[FFML] [SHnY] Taniguchi and Kunikida are dead, chapter six of six.

[Michael Clark]

> "Kyon, you make it sound like we're bitter rivals. While I don't know
> her feelings, I still admire her. I remember feeling left out[,] when
> she'd lead her elementary class on some sort of interesting activity.
> Well now I finally am in the same room, so club or brigade, it doesn't
> matter. We've found a way to all be on the same page and leave nobody
> out."

I suggest removing the bracketed comma or leading the sentence with the
dependent clause "when..." to get the structure right.

Also, for some reason I prefer "no one" over "nobody," but I can't
really place why.

> "Just let her come along at her own pace. I'm sure she'll surprise as
> all some day. I'm amazed that Nagato would push her own idea out there
> like that. I think I smell some of your handiwork in that?"

Surprise "us" all.  Also, both these last two sentences end in "that".

> "You have a keen nose. Nagato just wanted to bounce the concept off me
> first. She's a big science fiction fan, as you can see from what she
> reads. Her apartment is starting to get big stacks of books, so remind
> me at the meeting tomorrow[,] to say that we need to help her carry up
> some bookcases."

I think I understand why you want that comma there.  I'd just think
about it a bit?  It seems like a natural pause but an unnatural place to
put a comma.  Not sure what to do with that.

> With all the problems with Nagato, not to mention the squabbling

I'm concerned about "with" and "with".

> The next weekend was at the start of June[,] and Suzumiya executed a

Comma suggested.

> Suzumiya grabbed Sasaki, who had put down the reflector board, wrapped
> her arms around her neck, and kissed her. I could even see Suzumiya's
> tongue move against the inside of Sasaki's cheek.

With two girls, the pronouns can get a bit muddled.  I think this okay
as it is, but it wouldn't surprise me if someone else has to read this
over to make sure who's doing what is correct.

Hm, so now that order and chaos have decided to be united, is the world
in equilibrium?  The scene at lunch earlier becomes clear, but I guess I
should go back and review any foreshadowing of this development from
earlier.

> "A mere human has been messing with Yuki. Will you help me catch them
> or not?"

Nagato?

> I pulled them up, untied them and slapped them awake.
>
> "What?"
>
> "What the hell did you do, Kyon?"

Who's saying what?


I'm a bit disappointed that Kunikida and Taniguchi are actually alive
still.  I guess to Fujiwara, their death would've been recorded, though,
so it all works out.

So here we are.  Fujiwara played with some things, tried to change them.
Is it a simple effort to break the chain of causality?  Is it more
specific?  I guess we can't know for sure, only infer from what he did
change.  He brings everyone together.  He neutralizes Nagato in a way.
With Haruhi and Sasaki seemingly friendly or even more than that, all he
needs is that Kyon stay in the middle, keeping them both stable and
controlled?  I guess the ultimate end has to come from what we already
know.  It's just the link between what he's done and how that
accomplishes his ends is left to the imagination?

Maybe that's not the right way to put it, either, or I could've
forgotten something from the earlier installments, which if so, I
apologize.

I hope that was of some use, Henry.

-MC