[FFML] [Mai Hime, Future] The Summer of Her Discontent Teaser

[John Biles]

On Mon, Jul 20, 2009 at 8:26 AM, Bert Miller <hkmiller at theeddy.com> wrote:

> John Biles wrote:
> > However, because it cannibalized pieces from drafts which died and adds a
> > ton of new stuff, it ended up stupidly large.
> >
> That's not a problem.  Trust me.


It was hitting around 700 pages, which was too big.


>
> >     "Do you get to see your family very often?" I asked Mr. Smith
> > curiously.  I know he is from the US.
> >
> I think most Japanese would be more likely to say "from America";
> preferring "the US" to "America" is, in my experience, an Americanism.


Okay!

>
>
> >     "That's why we never went back to Tokyo," Kazuya said.  "You chose
> > wisely.  Osaka is a great city."
> >
> I see you settled on the "move everyone to Osaka" strategy.  Given how
> little fanfic is set there, this has a lot of potential:  kaiju battles
> involving Big O with Osaka Castle as a backdrop, etc.  ;)


Yeah, I decided to go with your advice as it worked well.


>
>
> >     Shizuru smiled.  "I grew up around Kyoto, but I like Osaka.  Of
> course,
> > you all stand out as outsiders to the locals, even now."  She has the
> local
> > accent and we don't.
> >
> Good point.  What accent do the kids have?
>

This is a good question.  Now, here's a little story.  I grew up in Texas,
but I have a Midwestern acceent (while using southern slang) because my
mother would rather I be ripped apart by a mob than sound like a
southerner.  In fact, in Huntsville, pretty much all middle class people
sound like they are from Ohio, while the working class has a southern
accent.  (Our upper class is so small, I have no clue what they sound like)

Would the parents force the Tokyo accent on their kids or would they just
let the kids pick up the local accent?  I honestly have no clue how much
accent snobbery there is in Japan.

Mind you, I can do a Southern accent if I want to.  It just isn't
instinctive to me.


> >     "A combination of investigation and negotiation," Shizuru said.  "We
> try
> > to help the parties involved to come to terms.
> This was a surprise:  having Shizuru also be a "Negotiator".  In
> hindsight, though, I can see it.  Though I'm not sure what she does if
> she gets caught up in violent situations like Roger does.


This is where knowing Natsuki comes in handy :)

>
>
> >     "Oh, the business with the container ship where half of it showed up
> on
> > the shore and the other half is missing?" Kazuya asked, sounding curious.
> >
> >     Shizuru and Natsuki looked curiously at Mr. Smith also.
> >
> >     "The curious thing is that the last example of this was a good
> > twenty-three years ago near Fuuka City when a ferry was cut in half," Mr.
> > Smith said.
> Heh.


Hehe.


>
>
> >   "However, whoever did this was not as good at cutting ships in
> > half as whoever did that."
> >
> Double heh.
>

Hehe.


>
> >     "This could have some connection to the appearance of a mysterious
> mech
> > during the destruction of Tallin," Mr. Smith said.  "Matching no known
> > model."
> >
> >     We suspect he's connected to that, but he doesn't seem to know about
> it,
> > I thought.  But if he isn't, who was?
> >
> >     Shizuru was smiling an odd smile and I don't know why.  It rather
> > reminded me of a mother smiling at her child, but that made no sense at
> all.
> >
> Well, I can see there've been developments.  The Hime have fingered
> Roger, and gotten the word out enough so that even Akane knows.  But
> Shizuru and Natsuki know more than Akane; are the Hime starting to keep
> secrets from each other?
>

This isn't so much a matter of secrets as Shizuru being amused that Mr.
Smith is pretending he's not connected to it. But Akanae can't read
Shizuru's mind.

(And Akane being naive enough to be conned by Roger pretending he is not
connected.)



>
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