[FFML] [orig] Keit-AI! Tomoyuki x Seiko Chapter 10: The Yankee Playboy and the False Flag

[Abdiel]

Later that Monday night...

"Quick, tell me what happened to former WWE champion Chris Benoit in
your dimension back in 2007," asked Alternate Universe Seiko Okamoto.

"...WW_E_?" returned Tomoyuki Yamamoto.

Yamamoto heard an annoyed grunt on the other line. "_Fine_. WW_F_.
_Federation_ instead of _Entertainment_. Former _WWF_ Champion Chris
Benoit."

Tomoyuki looked up the information on his phone. "He was never the WWF
Champion. He won the World Heavyweight Champion."

"CHERRY BOY!"

"Okay, okay. He died back in 2007. He committed suicide in my universe.
_Happy_?"

"What else?"

"What else _what_? He died, left a suicide note for his family to read,
saying he was joining Eddie Guerrero in heaven. Guerrero died in your
universe too, right? The WWF even had a tribute show about Benoit the
following night. Why? What happened in your world? Is it something as
shocking as a white Michael Jackson?"

"Are you _serious_? SHUT UP! THAT IS SO FREAKY!"

"OKAY! WHY ARE WE SCREAMING?"

And so AU Seiko explained to Tomoyuki the bone-chilling reason behind
her shrieks by detailing her universe's Chris Benoit double murder and
suicide, which (tragically) involved his wife Nancy Benoit and their son
Daniel.

Yamamoto didn't scream after learning the terrible truth (both versions
of Benoit had brains so damaged, they resembled that of an 80-year-old
Alzheimer's patient) but he was screaming _inside_, because the "bad
end" that Benoit suffered in his universe became an "even worse end" in
AU Seiko's universe.

He then came up with this conclusion. "Jeez, Seiko-chan. Your universe
sucks."

"Says the guy who lives in a universe where there's only one installment
of Final Fantasy."

"Yeah, like that's even remotely the same deal! At least it makes
_sense_ that Final Fantasy only has one installment. It's called _Final_
Fantasy, not _Forever_ Fantasy!"

"...Well, in other news, did you make up with the other me back in your
dimension or whatever?"

"Hey, nice _segue_."

"Shut up and answer, Cherry Boy."

"W-ell..."


========================================================================


Keit-AI! Tomoyuki x Seiko
An Anime-Inspired Original Story from 4chan's /a/ Board
By Abdiel
Original Idea by Hataki !WBLg6PTzh.
http://www.fictionpress.com/s/3206139/

Have you ever seen a harem from the outside looking in instead of the
inside looking out?


========================================================================

Chapter 10: The Yankee Playboy and the False Flag

========================================================================


Earlier that (momentous) May Monday afternoon in Maehara High...

As the "couple" of Tomoyuki Yamamoto and Miku Machida rose up the last
flight of stairs, they ended up face-to-face with Student Council
President Mana Otonashi, a platinum-blonde diva that showed how
different it was to gain popularity in an Eastern school as opposed to a
western one.

While in American schools, looks, charm, and people skills were the
main factors required to attain a place at the top of the food chain, in
Japanese schools, there was a breed of student that had both brains and
beauty. A super-being of sorts. Neither jock nor nerd, but both. A
sporty honor student.

That was Otonashi in a nutshell. She became the Class Rep of Class 2A
and the Student Body Council President by popular vote even though she
was only a second year high school student _exactly_ because she could
outscore (almost) everyone in the school and she could even win beauty
pageants or idol contests if she so chose.

In Japanese schools... or at least in Maehara High... brains and beauty
weren't mutually exclusive traits as far as popularity was concerned. Of
course, even with all her attributes, Otonashi wasn't perfect.

Non-AU Seiko Okamoto was far and beyond her superior in PE and Gym Class
(although Mana still scored high marks there). Ditto when it came to
overall grades. Every time, even back in first year, 2B's very own
Iincho always became the top scorer, at times beating 2A's Mana by one
or two digits.

Yamamoto wasn't sure what business the StuCo Pres had with Miku, but he
did know enough to be aware that ever since he met Machida, the 2B Class
Rep went out of her way to avoid talking to the gorgeous school idol.

At any rate, Tomoyuki was the first one to break eye contact from the
StuCo president, his gaze ending up on a glass-pane window that showed
the reflection of the silent confrontation between the two class reps.

Was there some universe in the multiverse wherein what was happening to
him was also happening to his alternate self? Was there a mirror
dimension like AU Okamoto's that looked so much like his own, but had
minute or overt differences?

In AU Seiko's dimension, were Otonoashi and Machida also at odds?

"...."

"Who is that, President Otonashi? Someone you know?"

"Hey, I know who that is! It's the nerdy iincho of 2B! Machida Miku!"

"Why is it that she needs to be a total bookworm in order to score high
in the tests, while the Pres here can do that without becoming a nerd?"

"I heard she's, like, a female _otaku_ or something."

"Yeah, and she even has _Cherry Boy_ as a best friend!"

"Cherry Boy? Ew! What an awful name!"

"Isn't he the weird pervert virgin guy who asks all the pretty girls out
even though he himself is nothing to write home about?"

"Yeah, that's the guy. The one who's too eager to get a girlfriend. The
creep Matsuda-san says has a _Friend Zone Harem_."

"HA! That's so lame! I bet he'd ask out anyone that has a vagina! Even
animals!"

"HAHAHA! Gross! That's nasty!"

"Female otaku? As in like those disgusting fat geeks that are into anime
and manga that hang out in Akihabara? The female version of those...
people?"

"Yuck! Why do you know so much about it?"

"...I-I heard about it on the news, okay? Some old guy was talking about
'figure zoku moe' or something. It was scary!"

"I know, right? I heard that all otaku are creepy pedophiles who like to
watch anime about little girls."

"So is that what 'moe' means? Anime about little girls?"

"Yeah, yeah! Lolitas! Animation and comics about Lolitas! Like the
movie!"

"I can't believe a girl would actually watch _that kind_ of anime. She'd
have to be nuts or have something wrong in her head to do that!"

However, instead of an epic showdown between the platinum-haired school
idol superstar of Maehara High and the humble bookworm iincho of Class
2B (who was, in fairness, academically superior), Otonashi chose to
ignore both Miku and Tomoyuki as she walked off, her floozies revolving
around her like her own personal satellites.

"...Let's go, girls," she commanded with a toss of her hair.

"Uh, right! Of course, Miss President!"

"Wait for us, Pres!"

Tomoyuki turned in time to see Machida look like she was about to say
something to the girl with the second highest grade average of their
year and Incumbent Student Council President, but the bespectacled young
woman chose to bite her lip and look away.

Yamamoto breathed a sigh of relief. The last thing he wanted was to be
recognized by the popular school idol who, once upon a time, made him
sing over the phone for her own amusement, even though he couldn't sing
and even though she couldn't stop talking about the guy who she'd rather
be with instead of him.

Who was that guy again? Oh wait... _Of course_. Who else could it have
been?

Sure enough, even as Tomoyuki remembered who Otonashi's true crush was,
the crowd parted amid hushed whispers (the likes of which the Cherry Boy
hadn't heard since it was rumored that he somehow snagged the Amazon
Queen and broke his friend zone losing streak).

Like Moses and the Red Sea, the man of the hour (or the day) came
through the separating crowd of humanity, his school bag in tow, with a
self-assured smirk on his face. It was the Class 2B delinquent himself,
Kazuhito Sugata.

Even though they were classmates in the first year, Tomoyuki was never
within Kazuhito's "inner circle" up until recently. The Cherry Boy had
_heard_ of the infamous Yankee of 1A, but his contact with him was
limited at best till the last couple of weeks.

Even back then, he knew the furyou was a notorious Casanova. Sugata had
different girls following him even when he first entered Maehara High.
Some of them upperclass(wo)men. Some of them flirty teachers. Some of
them from the nearby Shiba Commercial School.

Kazuhito had come a long way from being someone that both Seiko and her
AU counterpart claimed to be nothing more than a crybaby poser and
Hiroshima country bumpkin... or so Tomoyuki heard.

"Oh. I've been looking for you, Sugata-kun," the student body president
told the delinquent. "It's unfortunate that you've been suspended from
school for defending the honor of a maiden from that uncouth basketball
player, but I also heard you were honorable enough to take full
responsibility for the entire incident."

A tired Kazuhito scratched the back of his neck and guffawed. "It really
was my fault. I threw the first punch and I told both the principal and
the vice-principal as much. I'm man enough to admit that. Now if you
girls will excuse me, I'll be having my little siesta for now, if you
don't mind."

"But of course," cooed Otonoashi with a voice that Tomoyuki could best
describe as belonging to a voice talent or pop idol. Like a voice
actress from one of the "harem" anime he preferred to watch, as opposed
to the Boy's Love series that the closeted "fujoshi" Machida loved
instead. Those anime were the only "romance" anime that Yamamoto could
stand.

As Sugata did a small polite wave (instead of bow) at Mana and her
cohorts, he turned a corner and chanced upon the downtrodden-looking
Machida and Tomoyuki.

"Hey, Cherry Boy."

"H-Hey, Sugata. Too bad about the suspension, man. But thanks for the
save from that bully."

"Yeah, it sucks. But it was worth it, am I right? I sure shut Matsuda's
big mouth up."

"Ya sure did!"

Like Otonashi, the Yankee ended up ignoring Miku, but it was more out
of awkwardness from being dumped for the sake of fantasy bishonen
rather than (in Tomoyuki's eyes, at least) arrogant malice.

"Machida was worried about you too!" was Yamamoto's white lie for the
Class Rep's sake as he called out to the Yankee and gripped his next
door neighbor's shoulder supportively.

"...Thanks." Kazuhito gave Miku a sidelong glance that made her fidget
in panic before she could protest and deny Tomoyuki's claim.

"Y-You're welcome," replied Machida as she adjusted her glasses, their
glint hiding her eyes while she punched Yamamoto's arm like she were
Seiko herself.

"Omigosh! Don't tell me that Sugata-kun has the hots for that nerd!
They're totally incompatible!"

"Isn't he still hanging around that sports nut man-woman, the Amazon
Queen?"

"...Who said that?" asked Sugata as he circled back to the top of the
stairs, acting confrontational (as usual).

Meanwhile, both Machida and Yamamoto would've walked briskly back to
class had the commotion not gathered a crowd.

"Weren't there rumors of Okamoto hooking up with some _other_ guy behind
your back?" another one of Mana's "girl-friends" said.

"Well, Cherry Boy said that the rumors about Sei-kun aren't true, so..."
defended Kazuhito.

The same girl then answered, "'Cherry Boy' was probably the one who
spread those rumors from the get go!" much to Yamamoto's chagrin. He was
still within earshot, after all.

"'Sei-kun'? He calls her 'Sei-kun'? Even Sugata-kun doesn't see the
Amazon Queen as a woman!" some other girl supposed.

"Oh, come now! Why would he spread rumors only to say they weren't true
in the end?" reasoned Sugata, and Tomoyuki's respect for the scary
Yankee rose up again.

"Only because it backfired, no one believed they're true, and he didn't
want the Amazon Queen to end up hating him for lying. It makes perfect
sense," another girl from Otonashi's posse piped up.

"N-Now hold on a minute..." began Sugata as he wiped the large dollop of
sweat on his forehead. He wasn't used to _this_ type of confrontation.

Machida grabbed Yamamoto's sleeve and tugged at it before murmuring,
"Let's go back to class now, Yamamoto-kun. Please?"

Tomoyuki looked back at Miku helplessly as they were drowned by half
the student body who wanted to see the latest "publicity stunts" that
Sugata was pulling.

Dealing with bullies like Matsuda was one thing, but how could Kazuhito
get through a gaggle of gossiping girls and make their brand of
psychological terrorism stop without looking like the basketball player
did when he shoved 2C Class Rep Aya Fubuki down on the ground?

Even more students began gathering as Sugata was again in the eye of
another storm of controversy, his well-meaning actions delivering
himself and those around him into deeper trouble. From first to second
year, he was always a train wreck waiting to happen.

"You'd have to be a complete weirdo to _reject_ someone like Sugata-kun!
A Grade-A, egg-headed weirdo that's turned on by drawings of gay pretty
boys, I bet!

"What is she, seven? She's a girl who dates fat, stinky virgins or otaku
like herself because she has no taste in men."

"U-huh. Perverts should only date perverts, after all."

"What'd they even see in the Friend Zone King anyway? To still be
friends with someone as friendless as him is like asking for social
suicide."

Yamamoto drew Machida close as he saw the color in her face drain. That
last remark hit too close to home for the 2B Class Rep. All this time,
StuCo President Otonashi had barely said a word. However, she wasn't
exactly _stopping_ her posse from passive-aggressively lambasting
Sugata and every one of his circle of friends and acquaintances.

Meanwhile, Tomoyuki could see the 2B Iincho mouth the words, 'I hope the
normals would die in an explosion,' over and over.

"If you're going to date someone, why not date a girl that's not some
butch jock or nerd that are both two-timing you for the same guy?" one
of Otonashi's "moons" said, and everyone else in their clique agreed.

"Yeah, the President is certainly a better choice than some mousy
librarian girl who couldn't speak up for herself or a karate chick
who'd likelier kick poor Sugata-kun around than actually confess to him
her love."

"They aren't in love, they're only friends! They're practically brother
and sister. Opposites attract, right? Then what better way for Sugata-
kun to reform from his delinquency than to date the student body
president!"

"Hey, wait a minute. You guys aren't seriously _planning_ my dating life
without my say on it or something, right?" asked Sugata, his earlier
aggressiveness gone because there was no way he could save face from
hitting a bunch of gossips.

"Yeah! That's right! Don't President Otonashi and Sugata-kun look like
the perfect couple? They're, like, the best couple ever! Like Mark
Antony and Cleopatra! Or Romeo and Juliet!"

"...." both Machida and Yamamoto held their tongues to keep themselves
from pointing out that _both_ those couples had tragic fates involved in
their romances.

"Wait, wasn't Otonashi-san dating Kanemoto-san? So if she ended up
dating Sugata-kun, then wouldn't that mean she's two-timing _both_?
Isn't that a bit _shameless_?" the clear, well-modulated voice worthy of
someone voted as "Class Rep" asked.

A more high-pitched, babyish tone then pleaded, "Aya-chan! Not here!
Don't poke your nose into this cat fight! EEEK!" as everyone's heads
moved in unison to the origin of the two voices.

"...Who's that?" asked one of Otonoashi's "satellite" girls as they all
stared at the raven-haired, oval-eyed, and sharp-tongued Class Rep of 2C
while she herself put her hands on her hips as if daring Mana to answer.

"It's the two lesbians from 2C! Class Rep Fubuki Aya and her lover, Goto
Yukari!"

"_Another_ Class Rep? What is it about Sugata-kun and his iincho fetish?
I thought he was a _delinquent_! Where are all the delinquent girls who
are after him?"

The girl whom Sugata "rescued" after being shoved around by Matsuda...
Aya Fubuki of Class 2C... and classmate/_friend_ Yukari Goto had joined
the fray.

Several of the boys did congratulatory wolf-whistles at Kazuhito while
mocking, "You can have any girl you want, and here you are, hanging out
with Cherry Boy! Are you swinging for the other team, Sugata?"

"Cherry Boy" rolled his eyes. Here was the thing about friend zones and
nice guys he learned straight from Machida.

'If you're good looking, you have this thing called 'options'. It keeps
you from falling in love with anyone who's pretty and acts nice towards
you.'

Sugata wasn't being gay. He just wasn't desperate for companionship
like, well, Tomoyuki and many other boys in Maehara High School were.

Unfazed by the psychological attacks leveled at her by the Student
Council President's hangers-on, the confrontational Fubuki strode
straight towards the silent (yet consenting) Otonashi and asked:

"Well? Since everyone wants to air their dirty laundry right here, right
now, are you dating Kanemoto while flirting with Sugata or not? If
you're not going to answer, then I guess I'll have to ask your not-
boyfriend if he is instead just one of many boyfriends of yours."

Otonashi finally spoke instead of hiding behind the skirts of her posse.
And oh boy, did she speak a doozy of words.

"Ah, Aya-chan. If memory serves me correctly, weren't _you_ rescued
before by Sugata-kun even before that little incident just this morning
happened? From a bunch of delinquents too, to be exact. You were acting
like some sort of teacher as usual with these Yankees who wanted to
beat up Sugata-kun. They attacked you, and out came your knight in
shining armor to the rescue."

"...What are you trying to imply, _Mana_-chan?" hissed a reddened,
easily embarrassed Aya as the rest of the StuCo President clique giggled
at how she wore her heart in her sleeve.

"Me? I'm implying nothing at all. It's just that it makes sense you'd
come to Sugata-kun's rescue every single time. I heard the reason
Matsuda shoved you was because you slapped him after he badmouthed
Sugata-kun. And here you are again, probably intending to slap me too
over something that's beyond my control. Let people speculate. What do
you care?"

"Beyond your control? Really? You're full of...!"

"Full of _what_, Miss 2C Class Rep? Aren't you getting a little hot
under the collar because you also have a stake at the Sugata
Sweepstakes?"

"...I have no idea what you're talking about, Miss _President_."

"Ah. Now _who's_ full of _what_?"

"Seriously. It's not as if I'm doing this for _him_ or anything. What a
_shameless_ thing to even suggest! Don't compare yourself to me!"

As for the twin-tailed Yukari, she used her "tails" as earplugs while
the tittering Otonashi groupies pointed out, "Hey, isn't Fubuki's friend
the first girl in Maehara High that the Virgin King asked out? She's so
dumb she actually sent her love confession text to the wrong guy! What a
ditz!"

"Oh yeah! She totally ruined that guy's social life without even knowing
it! What an idiot!"

"But who did she _intend_ to send her text to?"

"Wouldn't you know it? It was for _Sugata-kun_, of all people!"

"BWAHAHAHA! That's hilarious! What a bimbo! She really thought she could
send a confession _through text_? Who does that? It's no wonder Fubuki
Aya is her only friend. Who'd want to be friends with a mentally retarded
person like her?"

Just then, when Sugata didn't think things could get any worse, his
childhood friend Seiko Okamoto arrived in the scene (she was actually in
the nearby girl's WC the whole time).

"...The hell is going on here? Was there a school meeting I'm not aware
of? What's with the crowd?" Seiko asked aloud as she dried her hands
with her handkerchief.

"It's the Amazon Queen! The burping, farting bull-dyke of 2B! No wonder
after all this time, she never hooked up with Sugata-kun even though she
was so close to him! She obviously likes...!"

That was a mistake on whoever it was that spoke, because unlike Sugata,
Okamoto was more than willing to hurt women without worrying about
saving face.

"Go on. Complete that sentence. Tell that to my _face_ instead of
tittering with your little friends. I dare you," Seiko challenged the
girl who called her out behind her back, which made the gossip shrink
back behind her friends.

"...So who among us do you like the most, Sugata-kun?" Otonashi asked
with a Cheshire Cat grin on her face, obviously intending to stoke the
flames created by her own lackeys. "I'm sure _everybody_ is _dying_ to
know."

"Eh? What was that?" Sugata asked as though he were an old man that lost
his hearing aid. "I didn't quite catch that, Seito Kaicho! Sorry! Ask me
again after my suspension is over!"

Like a scalded dog, he ran past the crowd of students (who looked like
picketers for a political rally with all the buzz they were creating
amongst themselves) and slid on the handrails of the stairs to quickly
get away from the mess that Mana and her minions created.

'...Well, that wasn't the most dignified of exits,' thought Tomoyuki
with half-lidded eyes along with the rest of the disappointed throng of
students expecting another brawl (or catfight) to erupt.

"WHAT ARE YOU KIDS DOING IN THE HALLWAYS? GET BACK TO CLASS!" the burly
second-year gym teacher screamed at the gathered students before some
sort of riot happened.


===


Later that Monday night...

"...'Yankee Playboy'? You're not serious, are you? Kazu-kun? A playboy?
That blonde, wannabe delinquent poser of your universe?" asked Okamoto.

"Actually..." Yamamoto sighed as he finally found the avenue to relay
the bad news regarding Seiko's childhood friend to her AU counterpart,
from him beating up the bully Matsuda to him getting swarmed by the
floozies of the Student Council President Mana Otonashi and the rest of
his Actual Harem (as opposed to the Cherry Boy's Friend Zone Harem).

The AU Amazon Queen was left speechless. "Kazu-kun did _what_? Why? I
mean, the Kazu-kun in my dimension manned up quite a bit too, but yours
seems like a total bastard!"

"Huh. That's strange, your other self in my dimension was all for him
beating up Matsuda. So am I, actually... although not to the extreme he
went," admitted Tomoyuki.

"Really? I don't know, Cherry Boy. I'm only getting this news through
secondhand info from you. I wasn't there. Maybe my other self knows
something about Kazu-kun that I don't know?" disclaimed AU Seiko.

"Speaking of which, what do you think of President Otonashi?"

"What about her?"

"Is she as insufferable in your world as ours?"

"...I guess? Not that I know of. I'm actually friends with Mana-chan.
She's a perfectly nice girl, if you ask me, even if she's a bit hard on
Miku-chin."

"_Really_? But she's so horrible in our dimension. Are you sure we're
talking about the same Otonashi Mana? Do our universes even have the
same StuCo Pres with the vindictive hangers-on?"

"Maybe the presence of a Yankee Kazu-kun in your version of Maehara High
is making all the difference there in your world? Because in mine, as
far as I'm concerned, the only time I've butted heads with the StuCo is
whenever I need a budget increase for the Judo Club."

"I see." Tomoyuki rubbed his chin. The AU Amazon Queen raised a valid
point. Maybe the presence of the delinquent of 2B was making all this
chaos and controversy possible.

The question was, how was he supposed to take advantage of the
circumstances before him to make his universe's Seiko look at him less
as a friend and more of a potential boyfriend even after being
friendzoned?

"You only gave up on Sugata after he dumped you for another childhood
friend of his, right?" asked Tomoyuki.

"...That was rather harsh and cruel of you to point out, but yes. That's
what happened, Mister Sensitivity," snapped AU Seiko.

"I'm thinking that maybe if I could make your other self get so jealous
with all the girls that are running after Sugata, she'd confess and get
dumped by him, so she should finally realize he doesn't see her that
way. What do you think?"

"I think you're a horrible, manipulative person and I expected better
from you. That's what I think," came the AU Amazon Queen's frank
assessment.

"Oh, come on! Every time I talk to Okamoto about something, it's always
'Furyou-kun' this or 'When will you and Miku-chin hook up' that. The
only way I could burst her bubble is to have her get unequivocally
dumped by Sugata. Otherwise, I'd really have a better shot at Machida
or..."

Oops. Tomoyuki let slip of something that wasn't supposed to slip out.
He should really start thinking before speaking.

"...Or?" prompted AU Okamoto. "Or _what_, Cherry Boy?"

"...Or Otonashi! Yeah, I'd be friendzoned so hard by Okamoto that it's
likelier for me to end up with Otonashi than with her. Yup."

"You're lying, aren't you?"

"What? No. How could you say that?" asked Tomoyuki as he wiped the
beads of sweat forming on his forehead and brows with his hand. Was AU
Okamoto psychic?

"Let's just cut to the chase. I know you don't share everything with me,
but I also know when you're hiding something from me. It's the way you
pause. You stammer. You beat around the bush yet still end up talking
about the thing you're attempting to hide. In that regard, you're
_exactly_ like the Yamamoto-kun I know in my dimension. Spit it out."

Wow. Even though his world's Okamoto was clueless about him, AU Okamoto
knew him like the back of her hand. It was kind of scary, actually.
"Fine. You know how the Tomoyuki in your universe doesn't have a Cherry
Boy nickname?"

"Yeah? What about it?"

"I recently met the girl partly responsible for that nickname of mine."

And then Cherry Boy proceeded to recap the history behind his nickname
and the rest of that Monday's multitude of events, like how his bumping
into Yukari Goto was the flap of the butterfly wings that created the
storm of controversy surrounding Class 2B's Yankee.

"...Are you giving up on my other self in favor of this ditz who first
dumped you?" was AU Seiko's strange conclusion after Tomoyuki told her
everything about Monday's crazy events.

"...What? No! What makes you say that?" cried Yamamoto. "She ruined my
social life! I'll be forever known as Cherry Boy even after I do get
laid! Like _hell_ I'll go after her again! I've learned my lesson!"

AU Seiko's streak of clinginess and jealousy reared its ugly head again.
Even after being surrounded by Otonashi, Fubuki, Goto, Machida, and the
StuCo President's groupies for so long, Sugata only hightailed his way
out of the school once _Okamoto_ was in the mix.

"Okay. Fine. If you say so. Although you wouldn't have hidden that fact
from me if you weren't feeling guilty." The AU Amazon Queen harrumphed.
"Speaking of which, what happened with your apology to my other self?
You keep changing the subject!"

"Oh, right. She said it's all right. I don't need to apologize, I was
partly right about her sending mixed messages to the people around
her... and she friendzoned me again."

"...You got friendzoned _again_?" repeated AU Seiko.

To be quite frank, he had his fill of talk about the Class 2B Yankee for
today. "Yeah. The Friend Zone King strikes again."

"A-Are you giving up?" stammered the tomboy, unsure of her romantic
chances now that the AU version of her own crush had blundered once more.

"Hell no. I've got _you_ by my side. There's no way she won't fall heads
over heels for me while I have your advice to depend on. It's only a
matter of time," he reassured the Amazon Queen from another universe,
although he himself wasn't sure if he was bluffing or not. Or maybe he
was in denial.

Perhaps he simply didn't want to end up losing _her_ as well as the
"flesh-and-blood" Seiko he could actually interact with. "How about you?
You haven't been updating me about my other self there in your universe.
How's your _friend zone_ with AU Tomoyuki going?"

"_My_ 'Tomoyuki'... Yamamoto-kun and I... are doing fine, thank you very
much," she said, and Yamamoto couldn't help but grin while imagining the
tough karate club captain blushing over calling the other him on a
first-name basis.

"...And? Don't you need my _advice_, Seiko-chan?"

After five minutes of hemming and hawing, AU Seiko finally relented.
"ARRGH! All right, fine! I made the same mistake as you did with my...
self. I got the name of some dumb movie wrong, and you... well, _he_
wouldn't stop laughing, and I punched him in the face."

"Wait, what? Are you serious?"

"Yeah."

Tomoyuki's subsequent laughter served as his way of saying, '_You're_
the one to talk about slipups, Amazon Queen! You're no worse than me!'
as revenge for her laughter for his UCC slipup earlier, which actually
led AU Seiko to drop his call.

"...H-Hello?"

A few minutes later, while he was still in shock, Seiko called back,
mumbling an apology.

"O-Okay. I'm sorry too. But shouldn't you have told me all this before
interrogating me about your other self?" asked Yamamoto.

"I-It's embarrassing, okay!?" She sighed. "What do I do now, Cherry Boy?
Yamamoto-kun... I mean, your other self was so mean! I couldn't help but
punch his face. How will I face him at school tomorrow?"

"It depends. What movie title did you get wrong?"

"...You're enjoying this, aren't you?"

"No, seriously. Didn't I give great advice in researching my other
self's likes and dislikes? So tell me what went wrong."

The defensive AU Seiko answered, "I have a _life_, Yamamoto-kun! You
can't expect me to know the title to every obscure art house movie from
the Fifties and Sixties... before I was even _born_... while serving as
the Judo Club's captain!"

"Okay, okay. Fine..."

"...Or cramming for exams with Miku-chin as a tutor so that I won't be
kicked out of the incoming tournament! Gimme a break!"

"I get it, Amazon Queen. Fair enough. Then again, was your mistake any
worse than my UCC flub? Chill for a minute."

AU Seiko snickered at that. "Well, maybe not. You have a point there.
Your flub was pretty bad."

"Yeah, yeah. So what's _your_ flub?"

"All right, _Dad_. I mispronounced the title of a Kurosawa movie we were
talking about... Dammit, I forgot its name again. _Segata_ something."

"Segata?"

"Yeah, or something."

It was Tomoyuki's turn to laugh out loud like his "otherworldly"
counterpart did (and, according to AU Seiko after she calmed down, he
did the _exact_ same laugh).

"FUCK YOU! Both you and Yamamoto-kun can go to hell, _AU_ Yamamoto-kun!"
shouted AU Seiko as she dropped his call for a second time.

The avid video gamer in Okamoto mispronounced "Sugata Sanshiro" as
"Segata Sanshiro", the fictional Sega-created character mascot based on
Sanshiro Sugata the judo master that was used to advertise the Sega
Saturn game console about a decade ago.

It was such a famous commercial from their childhood, it probably got
stuck in Okamoto's head, resulting in her Freudian slip. What was doubly
hilarious was that Sanshiro had the _same surname_ as her childhood
friend, and she still got the name wrong!

A little later, when AU Okamoto calmed down enough to finally call back
and mumble another apology, Tomoyuki asked, "But seriously, why would
_you_ get _that_ wrong? It's Sugata's _name_! Some childhood friend you
turned up to be!"

"SHADDAP! It's not _that_ funny..."


===


On the following Tuesday (during the day of Sugata's suspension), at the
JR Yamanote Line...

Dammit. Tomoyuki was so tired after the events of Monday afternoon that
he ended up oversleeping and taking the late train to Shiba that Tuesday
morning. Again.

"We meet again, Cherry... I mean, Yamamoto-kun!"

"Oh. Good morning, Goto."

Along with Yukari Goto. The ditzy texter who, as Otonashi's posse so
succinctly described, killed his social life.

However, he wasn't the only one who ended up exhausted by the antics of
Sugata (not Sanshiro) and his "true" harem (if there was anyone who
epitomized a light novel protagonist right down to his cluelessness,
then it would be Kazuhito).

First, there was the sleepy Miku Machida beside him who wasn't able to
wake him up on time because she herself overslept. Then there was Goto's
best friend, Aya Fubuki.

Yep, it was the two second-year class representatives and their
respective best friends riding on the same late train to Maehara High.

All that was left was Seiko and the StuCo President, and Tomoyuki's
"Friend Zone Harem" would be complete. He didn't count AU Seiko because
she was from another dimension and she kinda, sorta didn't "friendzone"
him.

What a day yesterday was. A suspension, a catfight, and yet another
friendzoning from Okamoto (two in a row).

He didn't know whether he was deluded for thinking this way, but by his
estimations, this was the closest he'd ever get to having a harem:
Gathering the good will of girls who told him they should just stay as
friends instead becoming anything more than that.

When he thought of it _that way_, he realized that Otonashi's little
posse did have a point about him being pathetic and lame.

Yamamoto yawned, rubbed his rheumy eyes, and assessed the situation
before him. As expected, the girl in his "harem" who hated him the
most... Aya... was keeping her distance from him by using Yukari as a
shield.

Right beside him, her head leaning on his shoulder until it went numb,
was a drowsy Miku, who herself was probably up all night in panic over
the Mana posse "exposing" her rumored (open) secret of being a closeted
fujoshi.

"Who do you like more? Miku-chan or Seiko-chan?" It was Goto who broke
the ice, and that was a _helluva_ ice breaker she came up with.

"Uhhh..." stammered Tomoyuki, feeling as though he was asked a trick or
loaded question. "Can I call a friend?"

"Come on. Didn't we bury the hatchet yesterday? Or are you still in love
with me after all this time?"

Yamamoto gulped while Machida stirred on his shoulder. Yukari was
exactly as he remembered her: Frank, honest, bubbly, and perceptive. She
might be an adorable klutz at times, but few people could keep up with
her energy.

"W-What are you talking about? O-Of course, I'm not! I can take a hint!"

Yukari's smile never left her face, as though unfazed by his confession.
'Of course, she's unfazed. She never loved me in the first place,' he
thought.

Before things got too awkward, Tomoyuki answered Goto's question.
"Okamoto, of course."

Yukari double-blinked. "Really? Are you sure it's not Miku-chan? That's
awfully cold of you. If she were awake, you'd break her heart."

"No, I won't. She loves me about as much as _you_ love me."

"...You don't know what you're talking about," concluded Yukari.

"That's all I'm going to say about it because if I say any more, she'd
wake up and get angry at me," swore Yamamoto. After all, the real reason
why she couldn't get a boyfriend was that she was a fujoshi who was in
love with 2D instead of 3D men.

...Okay. Maybe she'd still friendzone the Cherry Boy regardless of her
"fetish". Whatever.

He wasn't sure his former best (girl) friend was prepared to know that
his current best (girl) friend liked fictional men that didn't exist in
reality or any of the multiple dimensions out there.

Then again, Tomoyuki did like the rapport he had going with Yukari. It
had been months since they were able to hold an earnest conversation
like this.

At any rate, Goto dropped the subject and shifted to another one. "Okay,
so you're crushing hard on Seiko-chan. What makes her different from me,
Miku-chan, or any other girl who've friendzoned you?"

"Well, I confessed to her twice... once, intentional, once accidental...
and I got shot down both times. That's different than usual."

"Wait, you confessed to her _twice_? And you're still after her? Why?
I thought you can take a hint!" Yukari demanded, intrigued by Yamamoto's
determination. "On that note, why don't you try again with all the other
girls who friendzoned you?"

Tomoyuki wagged his finger at Yukari. "Let's just say that unlike the
letdowns I got from you, Machida, and Fubuki, I have a secret weapon
against Okamoto that will help me win her over sooner or later."

For some reason, Goto's jaw dropped and Fubuki was glaring at Yamamoto,
and he didn't know why. He then realized he let slip that Aya was part
of his Friend Zone Harem. _Kind of_.

"You shameless, lying son of a...!"

"W-Wait, let me explain, Fubuki!"

"...Famous last words, _Cherry Boy_."

Maybe Fubuki _didn't_ belong to Yamamoto's Friend Zone. He was instead
part of her Hate Zone.

Even Yukari was incensed. "The members of the StuCo Pres posse were
right, weren't they? You'd hit on anything that moves that's female!
Even animals! You animal!"

"I don't hit on animals!" was Yamamoto's damning denial that somehow
turned into an indirect confession. "I didn't hit on any of you at the
same time, okay? I went through each of you one-by-one!" No, that didn't
come out right either.

Before the confrontational Aya made a scene on the train and "choked a
bitch" (the same way she made a scene with Matsuda and President
Otonashi yesterday), a voice of reason prevailed.

"Would you guys turn it down? Jeez. Act like grownups. You're bothering
the other passengers," a cap-wearing young man that was about a year
younger than the four of them berated.

"Of course. We're sorry, Little Brother," apologized Fubuki.

Aya's younger sibling, Akira Fubuki, nodded, put back on the earphones
he removed after noticing the commotion that was happening right in
front of him (he sat across them on another bench), and lowered his cap
over his eyes while turning on his cellular phone's MP3 Player
functionality.

Yukari then whispered to Tomoyuki, "How many girls friendzoned you
exactly?" with an accusatory tone. "I thought I was your only one!"

"'None of your business' and 'What the hell?'" Yamamoto answered every
one of Yukari's questions respectively.

"...Was I your first time, though?"

"God dammit, Goto."


===


During the first period classes on Tuesday...

Tomoyuki got a text. It wasn't from AU Seiko, though (who was still
feeling miffed at him for yesterday's antics). It was instead from
Machida, of all people.

"What is your relationship with Goto Yukari-chan?" her message read.

He sent back, "Friend. She's just a friend. Like you."

To his bewilderment, Miku sent him the kind of text he'd expect Yukari
would send: "How good of a friend is she? Who's the better friend, her
or me?"

He replied, "Uh, you? You didn't give me a reputation of hitting on
anything female that moved. Because of her, I turned into the Pepe
Le Pew of our freshmen and junior years."

"OH! I see. So she's the girl who gave you the Cherry Boy nickname!"

Yamamoto's answers seemed to satisfy Machida for now. In fact, she was
all smiles at him every time their eyes met during class.

Nevertheless, he sure hated it whenever the girls who friendzoned him
acted in ways that suggested otherwise. Why the hell should Miku care
about him being better friends with someone else? It wasn't as if he was
being friends with people behind her back or anything!

'What am I thinking? When is _making friends_ a bad thing? It's not
_cheating_ to make friends with people other than your current friends!
It doesn't work that way!' he berated himself.

He added, 'Jeez, if you're going to friendzone someone, then _act_ like
it and stop being jealous of other, friendly girls around me. For the
love of Buddha, behave in a way that makes _sense_!'

Tomoyuki wanted so badly to send that message to every girl who ever
told him to just be friends (which was about all of the girls in his
cell phone address book, actually, give or take a relative and
acquaintance or two).


===


Tomoyuki splashed more water on his face and his bloodshot eyes. He
stared back at his reflection. His panda-ring lazy eyes. His disheveled
hair. His dried, cracked lips. 'Oh man. Maybe I should've stayed at
home.'

At least with Machida's case, she had those wide, coke-bottle glasses to
hide her pink-eye and eye bags. Besides which, she could still end up
with great grades even in her sleep. Not so with him.

He then wondered what his other self thought of AU Seiko. AU Tomoyuki
faced different circumstances than he did. For example, AU Machida and
him ended up as "childhood friends" earlier on, realizing that they
were neighbors _and_ classmates sooner than Yamamoto and Machida did.

Was AU Yamamoto clueless of AU Seiko's advances? Did AU Tomoyuki view
the other Okamoto like Yamamoto viewed Yukari? To him, was she a dear
friend sending mixed messages? A crush or potential crush who said
things that he didn't know how to interpret?

Was it wishful thinking that made him interpret Goto's innocent words in
a romantic manner? Or was he falling yet again for the same trap that
led him to become Maehara High's own infamous Cherry Boy? Always the
friend, but never the boyfriend?

AU Tomoyuki was blessed with the honor of never being called "Cherry
Boy". As much as AU Seiko's world sucked compared to his world, there
were things about the alternate universe Yamamoto envied, like his
other self's superior social positioning.

He wiped his face with his handkerchief dry. Perhaps his other self
didn't see things the way he did because he went through things that AU
Yamamoto never experienced.

Alas, AU Seiko was asking the wrong guy for advice on her crush, because
he and his other self might as well be polar opposites (despite the fact
that they both cross-dressed and pretended to be beauty pageant
contenders as their first memory when they were four years old).

He had no certain answers, only questions.

As he searched through his inbox full of messages from either AU Seiko,
Seiko, or Miku, nostalgia filled him.

It was once filled with messages from Yukari; messages he never once
deleted until that fateful day back in first year.

The only message he saved from her since then was the love confession: A
reminder for him to never read too deeply into what girls sent, said, or
did. A hard lesson to learn, since he made the same mistake again and
again regardless.

Yukari never asked him for his number back. She wanted to merely be
friends, and she meant it. No amount of "flirting" (she didn't even
consider it as such anyway) from her would change that fact.

She drew the lines on the sand and set boundaries. He should respect
them the same way she respected his answer regarding him forgiving (not
forgetting) what she did to him.

It was about time he learned his lesson on not getting ahead of himself.

'No, Seiko-chan. I won't fall in love with the first girl who pays
attention to me. Not anymore. For their sake and for mine, I'm going to
set my sights on you and you alone. Prepare yourself.'


===


That Tuesday afternoon...

"Hey, Romeo," said Non-AU Seiko in the middle of taking a break during
PE class on the football field.

"What's up, Juliet?" asked Tomoyuki as he got an eye-full of a sweaty,
dirty Okamoto in bloomers and a PE shirt.

With a smile, she rolled her eyes. "HA. You _wish_."

"Fine. What's happening, _Rosaline_?" said Yamamoto.

"...Who?" said Okamoto as she wiped her brow.

They had volleyball as their class's current subject for the semester.
The only things the Cherry Boy knew about the sport was setting and
digging.

"Never mind." Tomoyuki waved the question off, not feeling up to the
challenge of explaining to Seiko his literary joke. "How's Sugata
doing?"

"Furyou-kun's doing great. He went sightseeing at Shiba Park. He'd have
fun in Roppongi too, if he had cash to spare."

"...He doesn't give a damn about the suspension, huh?"

"Nope. He'd punch Matsuda's lights out again if given the chance. That's
just the way he is."

Yamamoto cleared his throat. As expected, as soon as the conversation
about Sugata died down, he had nothing left to talk about with Seiko.
Par for the course, really.

Instead of risking another "UCC" or "Pac-Man versus Merryweather" flub,
he decided to cut his losses and stop while he was ahead and still had
Okamoto's good will. To his surprise, Seiko continued the conversation.

"I couldn't help but overhear some of the mean things the StuCo Pres
entourage told you yesterday," said Seiko.

"Oh, _that_. It's no big deal, really," said Tomoyuki.

"Still, to have someone send a text-messaged love confession to you
that's meant for someone else? That's harsh, man," said the Amazon Queen
as she wrinkled her nose and patted the Cherry Boy's shoulder.

Yamamoto sighed. He thought this morning's messages from Machida was the
last he'd hear of Yukari for the day. "What's past is past. I've moved
on. I even find being called 'Cherry Boy' cute nowadays."

"Really?" asked Okamoto.

"...No, not really," said Tomoyuki as he shook his head and frowned.

"Well, _I_ think it's adorable!" said someone else entirely.

"...." was what the Friend Zone King and Amazon Queen "said" to the
cheerful interjection of Yukari Goto, the girl in question. "Speak of
the devil, here's the culprit right now."

"Wait. Yuka-chin is the girl who broke your heart?" asked Seiko as she
swung her head back and forth from Yukari to Tomoyuki. "SHUT UP."

"Huh? _Yuka-chin_? You know her?" asked Yamamoto.

"Why, yes. I've already met her a long time ago," said Okamoto.

"Really? Since when?"

"It was when I had to retake my History exam after failing. All the
students from the different sections who failed were shoved into one
classroom," she said.

Seiko then gestured towards the grinning Goto, who waved back. "That's
where I met Yuka-chin. I didn't know at the time that she was _the_ girl
who caused you to 'become' Cherry Boy, though."

"Huh," said Yamamoto as he scratched his chin. "That's... something."
Inwardly, he wondered how Okamoto would react if she found out it was
Sugata whom Goto fancied.

"So is this the girl who broke your heart, Cherry Boy? I can take care
of her _real good_ if you want me to," a grinning Okamoto stage-
whispered while she cracked her knuckles.

Strangely enough, a trembling Yukari hid behind _Tomoyuki_ for
protection. "EEEK! SAVE ME, CHERRY BOY!"

"Uh, no need for that, Amazon Queen. I'm over it," he reassured, unsure
if Seiko was joking or not.

Apparently, that was the case. Okamoto went behind Yamamoto and pulled
at the tearful Goto's twin-tailed hair with a huge smile on her face.

"_Anyway_, what are you doing here, Yuka-chin? Go back to your own
class," shooed Seiko away while Yukari pouted.

"We're over there at the covered courts nearby. Isn't that great? We're
doing PE together!" informed Goto. "Actually, the real reason I'm here
is because I wanna borrow your not-boyfriend for a bit, Seiko-chan!"

"Huh? Well, you don't need my permission or anything. Ask him yourself."
Okamoto crossed her arms. "And I don't like what you're trying to imply
there, missy."

Yukari giggled. "I don't know what you're talking about. Let's go,
Cherry Boy!"

"HEY! Wait a minute...!" Yamamoto scratched his head, wondering what all
the fuss was about, as he followed after Goto, his curiosity getting the
better of him. 'What now?'


===


"Gimme your number," Yukari asked from behind an alleyway and blind
corner between the football field and the covered courts, sounding like
the cutest mugger in the world.

Meanwhile, Yamamoto was acting like he _was_ being mugged by a high
school girl. "Are you serious? What? Why?"

"You obviously need help, Cherry Boy. I can make it all up to you by
being your Doctor of Love."

"Make _what_ up? Also, I need help in _what_ exactly?"

"Help in getting Seiko-chan to fall in love with you. You're doing
terrible out there."

"...So you lost my number, huh?"

"I couldn't help it. Your number traumatized me for the longest time! I
had to delete it to move on. You did the same to my number, didn't you?"

Instead of answering, he rolled his eyes and pulled out his cell phone.

Yamamoto didn't know what possessed him to forward the love confession
Goto sent to him last year that wasn't meant for him at all. Maybe,
despite his claims of forgiveness, he still was bitter.

"...Oh," she said as she read the contents of her own message before
saving Tomoyuki's number. Her face turning beet-red, she asked Tomoyuki,
"Did you mean what you sent? You aren't joking?"

"Huh? What do you...?"

"Look, you're a nice guy and all, and if you still have feelings for me,
then I..."

"!?"

Yamamoto's heart was just about to ram through his rib cage when Yukari
placed her face near his, closed her eyes, and invaded his personal
space. This made him backpedal into a wall.

All throughout, Tomoyuki remembered the face of Seiko (or AU Seiko),
accusing him of not having any resolve and falling for any girl who
showed him kindness. "W-W-What are you doing?!"

Yukari's eyes fluttered open as she raised an eyebrow at Yamamoto. "Duh.
I'm responding to your message. If you were joking, then that's a joke
in bad taste to send to a pure-hearted high school girl like myself."

"I SENT YOU YOUR OWN LOVE CONFESSION MESSAGE TO SUGATA THAT YOU SENT
ME!" Tomoyuki spelled out for Yukari after realizing their failure of
communication.

"...Oh." Goto's pinkish face went white. "You saved _that_ message? Why
would you...?"

"Because like I told you, I don't want to forget your mistake.... and
mine. Every time I fell for a girl, it was because I read too much into
what she was saying or doing."

"I don't understand," she said.

He continued. "Every little nice thing a pretty girl has ever done to
me has made me fall in love with her, even if she didn't mean it
romantically. It's pretty pathetic. I needed that message of yours to
break that bad habit of mine. In short, I misread your intentions. I
won't let that happen again."

"But it wasn't your fault! I was the one who sent that message without
sending a second one clarifying the first one wasn't meant for you! No
one could blame you for misunderstanding!"

"That's not what happened, though. They all blamed me for it. There's
nothing you can do to erase what came to pass. What's done is done."

"...Please, tell me what I should do!"

"Pardon?"

"I thought I could make it up to you by helping you get your new crush!
And when I thought you ended up falling for me again..." Her words
trailed off.

"G-Goto...?"

"But you're not in love with me, you're in love with someone else, and
you don't even want me to be in your life anymore because I did an
unforgivable thing last year! I ruined your reputation! I hate that I
ended up betraying you!"

"Look, it's not a big deal!" he said, although even he doubted the
sincerity of his words.

"I only wanted us to go back to the way things were. Is that too much
to ask?" she said.

Not knowing what else to do, Yamamoto decided to crawl over the bawling
Yukari and embrace her. "Didn't I tell you that I forgive you? Maybe you
didn't believe me the first time I said it because I kept acting so
bitter. I'm sorry about that. You really hurt my feelings. But really,
I'm over it."

"...I'm not over it, though. Please, tell me what I should do to make it
up to you."

"There's no need for that. I've never been happier since I became the
Cherry Boy."

"...What?"

He scratched his cheek. "I mean, it sucks that people think I'm the
Friend Zone King. But I know more now about women and dating since that
incident that I would've known without it. I kind of owe you one, in a
sense. Thank you."

Yukari then asked with a sniffle, "Can you let me back into your life?
Or was it just lip service when we agreed we'd just be friends?"

Yamamoto held Goto at arm's length and said, "I could never stay mad at
you. You made every late train ride I had special. If you want to come
back into my life, be my guest. I'd be honored to have you."

Yukari ended up grabbing hold of Tomoyuki's collar and hugging him
again, but because he didn't expect the move, they ended up bumping
noses and freezing stock-still as their lips ended up mere inches away
from each other.

"GAH! Y-You almost took my first...!" a lightheaded Yamamoto mumbled to
himself after they separated altogether in embarrassment.

"H-Heh. Then I guess I really am your first _everything_." Yukari smiled
and laughed weakly before she pulled at her ponytails and looked away.

They then heard a gasp from behind them. Tomoyuki cringed as he braced
himself for impact at the crane kick and karate chop that never came.
"O-Okamoto...?"

Instead, he saw a pale, trembling Machida, her hands covering her mouth
and her eyes as wide as headlights.

"...How long have you been standing there?" was not what Yamamoto
intended to say to Miku, but he said it anyway. This caused Machida to
turn and run away, which prompted him to run after her.

If he could freely travel through time, he'd first warn his first-year
self about Yukari's misleading text and/or kick his second-year self's
ass for saying something so stupid just now.

Regardless, the damage had been done. To think, he'd promised Machida
earlier that she was the better "friend" than Yukari.

Who the hell attempts to French kiss friends anyway? The French? Anyhow,
Tomoyuki turned over his shoulder Goto to see how she was doing. She
appeared like she had just run over a puppy with a car.

Damn, they just couldn't get a break. To think, she almost got closure
with all her blunders with him earlier.

He could still feel the warmth of Goto's breath on his lips. His heart
was being pulled in many different directions, and he couldn't decide
which way to go.

Today was shaping up to be an even crazier day than even yesterday.


===


After excusing himself from PE to look for Miku, claiming he had asthma
and he couldn't do anything strenuous fort today (he was already
hyperventilating anyway, so it looked legit), Tomoyuki figured out her
location pretty quickly.

However, by the time Yamamoto found Machida over at the rooftop of the
school, staring into space, he still had no idea what to tell her.

Didn't she, like Goto, reject his romantic advances? Did she have a say
on who he could and couldn't kiss, even though he didn't mean to kiss
anyone? So why was he running after her? Why did he feel so guilty? Why
was she reacting like he betrayed her? Did he betray her?

What about Yukari? How was he supposed to react to her from now on?
Should he pursue her instead of the uninterested Seiko or the
interested-but-unattainable-nonetheless AU Seiko? He'd already forgiven
Goto, right?

"There you are! God, you ran off before I knew it," was what Yukari told
Tomoyuki instead of what Yamamoto told Machida, startling the boy. "I
already talked to Miku-chan about it. I explained everything that had
happened."

"...Really?"

"Well, yeah."

Yamamoto raised an eyebrow at Goto.

She whispered back, "Okay, fine. I _lied_. She's not going to accept any
other answer from me, though. If you have any better ideas, I'm all
ears."

"What lie did you use? What did you tell her?"

"I told her you were choking, so I tried giving you CPR," she said with
a straight face and a thumb's up sign.

"...."

Gently pushing the bimbo away before she made a bad situation worse with
her idiocy, Yamamoto made a beeline towards the glassy-eyed, despairing
Machida and shook her awake by the shoulders.

"Wake up! Wake up! Let _me_ explain everything, Machida...!"

"No need to explain. You were choking and Yukari-chan gave you CPR so
that you'd recover," came Miku's lifeless response.

"Oh, come on! You're smarter than that! You know that's an obvious lie!
Even a fifth grader can tell that's a lie! Don't let your mind slip into
extreme denial, Machida!"

The light in her eyes not returning, Miku continued, "But that can't be,
Yamamoto-kun. I know you would never say one thing then do another
thing, so spontaneous CPR makes perfect sense. If you say that Yukari-
chan is only a friend and we're closer friends, then that's the truth.
If you say you're serious about going after Seiko-chan, then of course
I'd believe you. You've never betrayed me before, so why start now?"

Yamamoto went down on all fours, his head bowed low in defeat. "She
could've at least told you she was doing the Heimlich Maneuver."

"Don't be silly, Yamamoto-kun. You don't do the Heimlich up front with
your lips and tongue."

"There was no tongue! Or lips! I swear!"

"Oh, for fuck's sake..."

Like a professional wrestler, _Okamoto_ (of all people) came from out of
nowhere (since when did she get there?) and grabbed hold of both the
collars of Yamamoto and Machida in an attempt to mash together their
lips like she were playing with two life-sized dolls and she wanted to
have them kiss.

"OKAMOTO? Where the hell did you...? HEY!" said Tomoyuki.

"EEEK! S-S-Seiko-chan!?" shrieked Miku.

"Eeeh? Is this a good idea, Seiko-chan?" asked Yukari as she bit her
knuckles.

Apparently, as far as Tomoyuki could tell, the perennially tardy twin-
tailed girl neglected to mention that before the asthmatic, non-athletic
Cherry Boy arrived on the scene, both she and the Amazon Queen had
already found and talked to Class 2B's Iincho.

"NOOO!" Miku screamed as she covered Tomoyuki's lips with both hands.
"Not this way." With cheeks as pink as a peach, she moved Yamamoto's
head sideways and kissed his cheek. "There. We're even now, Yamamoto-
kun. Yukari-chan."

"M-Machida..."

"Don't misunderstand. I'll let you off the hook just this once, okay?"
she said with a stern look as she pressed her finger on his lips to
silence him. "No more lying to me, okay?"

"Y-Yes'm."

Goto bit her lips. The same lips that almost touched Tomoyuki's. "Yeah,
sure, I guess. Whatever works, Miku-chan."

Seiko heaved a sigh of relief. "Well, I guess all's well that ends well.
Right, Cherry...? EEK!"

She then ended up chopping Tomoyuki's throat by reflex as he lunged at
her with puckered lips that both scared her and made her burst laughing
at the same time. "What the hell, Cherry Boy!?"

The coughing and smirking Tomoyuki said with a mock hoarse voice, "I'm
choking, Amazon Queen! Gimme CPR."

"I'll do you one better. I'll get you to the ICU! Or maybe even the
_UCC_!" said the Karate Club Captain as she brought Yamamoto to his
knees with a sleeper hold.

Meanwhile, as Tomoyuki reached nirvana, his back cushioned by the plump,
soft breasts of his crush while his head was crushed by her biceps, he
considered whether or not he should tell AU Seiko that he'd almost
gotten his first kiss from someone other than her counterpart in his
universe.


===


Next: Tomoyuki's resolve.

Rosaline is the girl Romeo fell in love with before meeting Juliet.

No, Japanese school idols and popular kids in American schools aren't
really like _that_ in real life. Come on. You should know better than to
trust works of _fiction_. Next you'll tell me you believe in the various
"factoids" given by the Da Vinci Code.

Also, this is a work that, for once, is in the point of view of the
"Sunohara" of a harem work instead of the harem lead! How about that?

Farewell,
Abdiel
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