[FFML] [orig] Keit-AI! Tomoyuki x Seiko Chapter 5: Sticks and Stones

[Abdiel]

That Friday, in Maehara High School, during recess, Tomoyuki Yamamoto
called his crush on his cell phone, Seiko Okamoto. It'd been two weeks
since they started conversing and messaging each other via their mobile
phones.

There was nothing unusual about that... save for the fact that Tomoyuki
was actually Section 2B's infamous Cherry Boy, the person who was also
known in the entire school as the Friend Zone King. His exploits in
being friendzoned had reached legendary status, and his classmates had
voted him the boy who'd most likely remain a virgin after forty.

He never once was able to get a girl look at him romantically in all his
seventeen years on this earth, and even his best friend and nerdy next
door neighbor, Miku Machida... the Class Rep of Section 2B... had also
pushed him into the Friend Zone.

There was also the fact that the person he was calling wasn't the real
Seiko Okamoto, the Amazon Queen of Section 2B... or at least the Seiko
he knew in his world. No, this person was instead the Seiko of another
dimension, a world similar to Tomoyuki's, but different all the same.

Neither knew how their cell phones were able to call each other across
dimensions. All they knew was that they had somehow gotten each other's
numbers and they were able to call each other even though they lived in
separate worlds. They never really questioned the concept.

This was their story.


========================================================================


Keit-AI! Tomoyuki x Seiko
An Anime-Inspired Original Story from 4chan's /a/ Board
By Abdiel
Original Idea by Hataki
http://www.fictionpress.com/s/3206139/

It's about time the tomboyish side of Seiko was shown instead of merely
talking about it... Well, sort of.


========================================================================

Chapter 5: Sticks and Stones

========================================================================


Yamamoto knew that not all bullies had some Freudian excuse for their
actions, or came from troubled homes, or were out to ruin the lives of
the people they victimize to make themselves feel better. Some of them
were simply doing the same things anyone else would do to a weirdo that
stood out like a sore thumb, feeling perfectly justified with picking on
someone different because of their socially awkward and off-putting
actions.

The problem with fictional bullies when compared to real ones was that
they were written by people who got bullied a lot, so they tended to
get portrayed as trying-hard dorks at best and unfunny, uninspired
morons at worse.

A real bully wasn't someone who got violent at the drop of a hat like in
fictional stories (although they were all egomaniacs in one degree or
another). These people were instead jackasses who lived by their own
rules and who could act like the best and worst persons they could
possibly be while making others follow them around in accordance to
their whims thanks to their charm.

Bullies weren't the caricatures found in fiction. They were actually
quite cool. The cool kids as portrayed in animation, television, and
film weren't quite the same either. Sure, they were shallow. Sure, they
were full of themselves like their fictional counterparts.

And yes, some of them were quite evil to the point of psychosis. Yet the
thing that most fictional adaptations of bullying leave out was the fact
that these were funny, charming, and popular guys.

There were times when a fictional work mentioned that the bullies were
charismatic and whatnot, but most of the time, this was just proverbial
lip service. They never actually portrayed bullies as their charming
selves, which Yamamoto personally thought as a disservice because it
made the bullied people in television look like a bunch of morons
letting trying-hard idiots push them around.

Many bullies also felt that all their horrendous actions were somewhat
justified. Sure, there were some assholes who get carried away, but for
the most part, to them, their victims "asked for it" for being socially
inept weirdoes that needed to be put into their place so that they'd
learn how to act like normal people.

As cruel as it was, this sense of "Schadenfreude," as the Germans
called it, was something common to all people, because everyone had a
tendency to bully those weaker than them.

How did Miku Machida describe Schadenfreude? Oh yes, it was pleasure
derived from the misfortune of others. Yes, there was an actual name for
that sadistic feeling people had when others undergo pain, and it was a
_German_ word, appropriately enough.

Bullies rarely ever or at all feel regret for their malicious acts,
although they weren't proud of it either, because when was the last time
someone ever heard a bully proudly calling himself one? In Japan, such
pranks probably weren't even considered as bullying.

Were the situation reversed, would Yamamoto have done the same to the
bullies? Not for the sake of revenge, of course, but for the sake of the
argument that if he were popular and respected like they were now, would
he be any better than them?

He'd like to think yes, but then he knew better. Based on his behavior
before he became "Cherry Boy", he knew that he was no better than the
bullies who plagued him or the people that laughed along with them.

Before he was being dunked into toilets, he was no better than those
goons who harassed him. He was a "beta male" by the real definition of
the term (the one supplied to him by the Class Rep): A sycophant that
played along with bully pranks to avoid being bullied himself.

He had no right to complain. Bullying was a guilty pleasure bullies
rarely if ever felt guilty about because they justify their bullying
over weirdoes as par for the course or only natural.

At any rate, the mark of a true-life high school bully was doing
something to you that, while it sucked for you, you'd be laughing your
ass off if you saw it happen to someone else, as horrible as it might
sound.

For example, Matsuda once made the entire class laugh when he said that
Yamamoto had been friendzoned by so many girls he could make a "harem"
out of them (and it was indeed true). Matsuda's mouth and wit, more than
his fists and his large stature, intimidated Tomoyuki the most.

Long story short, the thing about bullies was that anyone could be a
bully. Wasn't it the author of "Kokoro", Natsume Soseki himself, who
wrote that there was no such thing as a breed of bad humans, and the
most frightening thing about any man was that when given the
opportunity, they could become as bad as they wanted themselves to be?


===


On Friday, in the middle of Tomoyuki's call to Seiko, a couple of
classmates of his... all jocks from Maehara High's top athletic clubs...
decided to mess around with him by snatching his phone and asking him
who he was calling.

One thing led to another, and now Yamamoto was running for dear life as
Matsuda... who was part of the Basketball Club... Ishiguro... who was
part of the Boxing Club... and Kanemoto... who was the Judo Club's
Captain... was now in hot pursuit of him.

To make a long story short, in order to avoid having his bullies
discover his secret in regards to an alternate universe version of Seiko
calling him, Tomoyuki was forced to take a swing at them. However, his
fist landed straight into the crotch of the Basketball Club's Matsuda,
so now it was open season for cherry boys, namely him.

Yamamoto ran as far as his thin, non-athletic legs could carry him.
Meanwhile, the human sharks behind him jogged at a leisurely pace, their
sharp-toothed grins gleaming in the sunlight.

Dammit.

Although getting beat up by those three jockstraps was always an ever-
present danger in the Cherry Boy's mind, he was far more concerned
about Matsuda's sadistic brain than his just-as-dangerous brawn. Come
to think of it, the big-headed basketball player knew a multitude of
ways to mess with people using words _and_ actions.

With that said, Yaamoto's asthma was already kicking in, and he had no
time to whip out his inhaler to keep his wheezing down. The physical
exertion was literally killing him. By a stroke of "luck", he was
fortunate enough to make his bullies laugh at his pathetic state hard
enough for him to get away, their own mirth keeping them from catching
up.

Yamamoto didn't know what to feel about that. He didn't have enough
oxygen going to his brain (or any time left) to let him think about the
implications of how pathetic he looked at the moment. The trio of
Matsuda, Kanemoto, and Ishiguro were about done with their light jog.

Did he mention that he was more afraid of the teasing than the physical
pain? Well, as soon as Matsuda landed his punch to his gut, he quickly
realized just how stupid he was being for thinking that while air
whooshed out of his lungs. He doubled over and collapsed on the soccer
field before he scrambled up, crawling blindly towards one of the two
football goals.

"Whoops. I was aiming for your nuts. You need to keep still, Cherry
Boy!" said Matsuda while grabbing hold of the struggling, blue-faced
Yamamoto as if he were merely helping him up. "Easy there, partner. It
looks like you're about to have a heart attack." At any rate, people had
begun to gather around the soccer field... curious onlookers who wanted
to know what Class 2B's infamous trio of jocks were up to now.

The assembled audience all sported huge grins because they remembered
that these three jocks usually delivered when it came to hilarious
pranks, like the time when they used an online picture of a cosplayer
(someone who dressed up like an anime character, which was very common
in conventions like Comiket that otaku and fujoshi like Machida
regularly attended) on a dating profile in order to lure unsuspecting
lonely people to reveal that they were otaku freaks.

The profile was a singles ad that required those who wanted to respond
to include their top favorite anime (which made sense, since the female
featured there was supposed to be a young girl who was into cosplay).
Tomoyuki couldn't remember the name of the anime character that the girl
whose picture Matsuda and company used for the dating profile was
supposed to be cosplaying as, but her name had something to do with
underwear, from what he could recall.

The whole class laughed it up as Matsuda and company got all sorts of
responses from weirdoes that they shared via mass-sent email to all
their classmates. Everyone had a hoot and a half over the fat "big
friends" (they were called as such because they watched cartoons made
for "little friends" or kids) who said they liked kiddy shows that had a
strong adult periphery demographic, like magical girl series with a moe
slant (whatever "moe" meant).

They were the hardcore otaku that posted an entire laundry list of
anime, thinking they'd have a better chance at scoring with the red-
dressed cosplayer that way. There were also the guys who watched anime
casually and only knew about boy's anime from their childhood (the ones
that dealt with fights and different power levels that lasted multiple
episodes before anything significant happened).

The tough guys who seriously responded to the fake ad and posted
pictures of themselves in various states of muscular undress while
trying to think up of their favorite cartoons were also amusing
(particularly the ones that misspelled the names of the anime they
supposedly adore). The real laugh riots were the ones who cited adult,
erotic anime in their list of favorites.

Yamamoto couldn't forget the one who mentioned he was 100% disease-free
and considered the act of sending text messages as a valid "hobby".
However, the really creepy ones were the anime nerds that were older
than dirt and knew animation that probably even Tomoyuki's parents
weren't aware of. These old geezers actually had the gall to click on a
young girl's single's ad. The entire class would never forget that
practical joke.

That was the brand of bullying that Matsuda brought to the table. It was
mean-spirited and done in bad taste without a doubt, yet ultimately
hilarious, especially for those who weren't being victimized by his
monkeyshines. This was why after Yamamoto had gotten enough time to
recover from his asthma, catch his breath, and get a puff from his
inhaler (he seriously thought he was going to die), he immediately
surrendered to his tormentors.

He had no allies amongst the gathered. He might as well give up. He put
his hands up in the air and said, "Okay, Matsuda, I get it. I'm sorry.
What I did earlier was an accident, honest! Hit me in the nuts and get
it over with, please."

"Oh, it was an _accident_ now, is it?" Matsuda guffawed as he paraded
the out-of-breath Cherry Boy around the crowd. "If that's the case, then
I can't possibly kick your nuts now! If what you did was accidental,
then it hardly seems fair for me to intentionally hit you on the balls,
wouldn't it?" the basketball player pointed out, which to Tomoyuki's
ears meant, "No, you're not going to get off that easily."

'Oh no.'

Both Ishiguro and Kanemoto stood back and let the maestro Class Clown go
about his work while they grinned like idiots. Tomoyuki couldn't do
anything about it even if he tried; that nut shot he gave Matsuda was a
once-in-a-lifetime fluke that the gigantic lug didn't want him to ever
forget.

Matsuda turned and addressed the crowd with his loud and obnoxious voice
that made Yamamoto cringe. "Ladies and gentlemen, let me introduce you
to Class 2B's very own Cherry Boy, Yamamoto Tomoyuki. I'm sure you've
all probably heard of the exploits of this ladies man. Some of the girls
might have gotten a love letter or two from him too."

The crowd snickered as they lapped Matsuda's spiel up. Meanwhile,
Tomoyuki wished he had a shovel so that he could dig a ditch he could
bury himself in to hide in embarrassment. 'I should've just lied and
told them my mom was calling me or something.'

"Anyway, to make a long story short, the Virgin King is already on the
threshold of manhood! He will no longer be a Cherry Boy any longer,
because we've discovered that he has actually gotten himself a
girlfriend! He was calling her a while ago, acting all lovey-dovey
on his cell phone!"

As laughter mixed with gasps of snickering "shock" and murmurs of,
"Seriously?" echoed across the growing throng of students, a misty-eyed
Yamamoto dropped to his knees and grabbed hold of the sides of his face.
This couldn't be happening. 'Just kill me now,' he thought as he felt
the amused stares of everyone bore through him.

"The catch, though, is the fact that we still have no idea who the
special girl is!" Matsuda grinned and waggled his eyebrows as the hoots
and hollers from the throng of students grew louder, while the girls
that did put Tomoyuki into the "Friend Zone" glanced around nervously,
afraid that they too would be shoved into this awkward spotlight of
sorts.

They probably hated Ymamoto's guts right about then for having the
audacity to fall for them in the first place with his bothersome,
desperate love.

"We've all heard of Cherry Boy's attempts to woo girls. We probably even
know some of them already, like the girl he helped get her class picture
scanned so that she'd have a digital copy of it, or the one he helped
get a gift for her boyfriend because she didn't have the time to shop.
When it comes to trying to get the girls, he's the nicest guy around!"

The red-eyed Yamamoto raised his head up in time to see both Kazuhito
Sugata and Miku Machida looking at him from across the field, their
mouths agape in shock at what was happening. Wait, they were together?

'Of course, they are,' Tomoyuki thought bitterly. 'Why wouldn't a
fujoshi like the Class Rep fall for our class's resident bad boy,
Furyou-kun?'

"So if you all don't mind, because everyone is curious, I'd like to find
out which one of the girls who friendzoned Cherry Boy was the one who
called him earlier. I'd also like to know if this isn't some sort of
elaborate ruse. Sure, I could get the info from Cherry Boy himself, but
for some reason, he seems quite secretive about that call. This is
silly, because the whole school is practically aware of his love life by
now..."

'That's all your fault,' Tomoyuki wanted to retort, but couldn't. What
Matsuda was doing wasn't eye-for-an-eye revenge; he wanted to make sure
that Yamamoto suffered. He was hit on the nuts, so now he had the Cherry
Boy by the balls.

Matsuda grabbed Yamamoto by the collar and wrested his turned-off cell
phone away from him. "If any of the girls that are friends or have
rejected Cherry Boy outright got a change of heart and decided to date
him, come forward now or forever hold your peace. If you're not going
to come forward, then I'll just have to reveal who it is that called him
myself."

"Matsuda! Please stop! You're going too far!" begged Tomoyuki amidst
the growing murmur of the crowd, but Matsuda merely ignored him while
circling around him like a predator would his prey. Yamamoto glanced
back to the crowd in time to see Miku relinquish his grip of Sugata and
begin running towards his direction. 'Machida, no! Don't involve
yourself with these clowns!'

From behind him, Tomoyuki heard Kanemoto pipe up, "Ah! I knew it! It was
the Class Rep...!"

The next thing everyone knew, the six-footer body of Matsuda went
sailing past a wide-eyed Tomoyuki while the Section 2B Iincho stopped
dead on her tracks before her presence was revealed to the rest of the
crowd. The beefy jock fell to the ground like a sack of bricks,
producing a cloud of smoke in his wake.

Everyone turned around in time to see Seiko Okamoto in a basic Kokucho
Dachi or Back Stance Posture for Shotokan Karate.

"Sei... I mean, Okamoto!" Tomoyuki blurted out to Seiko as he scrambled
up to his feet. "W-What are you...?"

"A-Amazon Queen," Ishiguro mumbled, gulping, while Kanemoto furrowed his
eyebrows. "What's the meaning of this, Okamoto?" the judo captain asked.

Ignoring the two jocks, Okamoto gave Yamamoto a sidelong glance,
grinned, and winked while doing a peace sign. Consequently, Tommoyuki
felt all the blood in his body rush towards his head, particularly his
cheeks.

To the two bullies left standing, she said, "We only became classmates
recently, so it's understandable if you didn't know."

"Didn't know what?" asked Ishiguro, biting at Okamoto's bait and
getting caught hook, line, and sinker.

"Before I became known as the Amazon Queen of Section 2B, I was more
renowned by another name. Maybe you've heard of me? In middle school, I
was called the Bully Hunter."

'I-Ijime Hanta?' repeated Yamamoto in his mind before the Amazon Queen
grabbed hold of his hand and led him away from his bullies and the
crowd.


===


He was already at his limits before, but perhaps due to the adrenalin
rush of having Seiko grab his hand and, for lack of a better term,
"rescue" him from his bullies like old times, he was able to keep up
with her despite his condition.

Besides, even if he were to die right then and there because of
asphyxiation, it'd be all right. He would've died while holding hands
with a girl; a laughable death for some, but for the Virgin King, it was
a priceless commodity.

"Hey, Yamamoto-kun! You okay? You look kind of blue," said Okamoto while
Yamamoto hunched over and wheezed his way back to retrieve lost air.
After several hard slaps to the back and a coughing fit, Tomoyuki
finally regained his breath enough to speak.

"No problem," rasped a pale, blue-faced Yamamoto with a "thumbs up"
sign.

"THAT'S OBVIOUSLY A LIE!" snarled the Amazon Queen, Bully Hunter,
"Transvestite" (according to her childhood friend, Sugata), and woman of
many names while shaking Tomoyuki around. Unfortunately, this only led
to aggravating the Cherry Boy's asthma.

"Ah! Sorry, I got carried away again!" apologized Seiko while patting
the back of Yamamoto, who was now coughing up phlegm.

This time around, after Tomoyuki got a hold of his inhaler and took a
much needed puff of the bronchodilator so that his asthma would finally
subside to manageable levels, he asked Seiko, "Now why the heck did you
do that?"

"Do what?"

"Get me out of trouble."

"Yeah. How _dare_ I, huh?"

"N-No, that's not what I meant..." stuttered Yamamoto as he took stock
of his current location. From what he could gather, they were behind the
school pool, just beside the street leading to the highway from the
other side of the football field. "I mean... Thanks. But why...?"

"What? I can't help a classmate in need?"

"I thought you've stopped being the Bully Hunter."

"Well, I guess talking to you about it the other day kind of made me
reminisce about... simpler times."

"B-But you shouldn't have interfered!" was Tomoyuki's stuttering attempt
at admonishing his savior. "Now everyone might..."

"Everyone might what?" reiterated Seiko.

"Y'know. Misunderstand. They might misunderstand things."

"Oh."

Yamamoto woke up from his brief reprieve as Okamoto slapped his behind
and slung her arm around his shoulder. "I never gave a damn about what
other people thought. Why should I start thinking about it now?"

All he could do in response was scratch his head and bow back at the
girl who invaded his personal space with little to no resistance on his
part. "I'm so sorry for troubling you with my own problems."

She raised a hand to interrupt him. "Think nothing of it. I never liked
those bullies of yours. They're so full of themselves. I'm glad I was
able to punch out that donkey-toothed Matsuda. He's a real asshole,
isn't he?"

"...What's the meaning of this, Amazon Queen?"

The pair froze in their tracks. As they turned as one, Yamamoto felt
Okamoto retract her arm from his.

Before them stood a cross-armed Kanemoto, his nose upturned at them as
though he were in front of a fish market or the city dump. "I want you
to explain yourself."

The both of them got blindsided by the two other bullies. Yamamoto
dully noted as he got pounded like a slab of meat by the middleweight-
level punches of Ishiguro that Matsuda had managed to land a sucker
punch... a rabbit punch with brass knuckles, at that... on Okamoto's
temple.

"I don't usually hit girls, but since you barely even act like one, I
guess I could make an exception," said Matsuda as he walloped the dizzy
Seiko twice over on the stomach.

"YOU BASTARD!" Yamamoto hissed as he poked Ishiguro's eye with his thumb
and took a swing at Matsuda. Unfortunately, his own sucker punch didn't
pack as much of a bite as his earlier low blow, which meant he was left
at the mercy of the basketball player and a member of the Boxing Club.

Kanemoto harrumphed as he turned his back on the carnage. "You idiots
better not hit either of them on the face or arms. I don't want to end
up with more trouble than it's worth."

They all heard a cackle that sent chills down their spine.

"Hehehe. Iiinteresting," said a grinning Seiko as she cracked her
knuckles. "It's been a while since I've been in a real fight."

Without ceremony, Matsuda hit Okamoto in the face.

"You idiot! Do you want to get expelled?" shouted Kanemoto too late. Not
that it mattered, because the next thing Matsuda knew, his hand was at
his back and his brass knuckles were ripped from his fingers, breaking
several of them.

"AAAIIEE!"

"Hey, wait! It was Matsuda that hit you, not me!" yelped Ishiguro before
his face met the business end of Okamoto's high kick, his jaw shuddering
from the impact.

"That was for Yamamoto-kun, you gorilla bastard. Shame on you, picking
on a ninety-pound asthmatic," berated the tall Seiko while wrapping her
hands around Matsuda's thick neck and pounding on his face repeatedly
with his own brass knuckles until his nose ripened like a tomato.

"All right, that's it, you bitch! The kid's gloves are off!"

"Oh-ho. You won't go down easily?"

Yamamoto stayed down on the floor, his uniform full of shoe marks from
his bullies, his eye seeing stars. He then saw a face-full of Seiko's
spandex underpants as he watched the action from below.

Okamoto and Ishiguro hit each other with their respective Sunday
punches. Tomoyuki shouldn't be surprised since Ishiguro outweighed her
several pounds, but it was Seiko who got the short end of the stick and
staggered from the mutual exchange of blows.

The beastly Ishiguro punched his own jaw. "That was a nice punch. Nine
more of those, and maybe I'll start feeling it."

Seiko licked her lips. "Good idea. Let's do just that."

'Why am I hard?' thought Yamamoto as he hid his crotch from view.

Okamoto never stopped grinning all that time. Even during the karate
competitions she won for the school, Yamamoto had never seen her this
happy before.

For every all-or-nothing sledgehammer blow that Ishiguro swung... it was
a tossup if they landed or not... Okamoto landed four to five punches or
kicks from all angles while moving every time towards her opponent's
blind spot.

As such, for every two punches Ishiguro threw, he began feeling Seiko
pound him into mincemeat because, like he said, he could only feel her
best punches if they were thrown ten at a time.

She was amazing. Seiko was a one-woman melee. The legends about her
being a bully hunter... _the_ Bully Hunter... were true, and Tomoyuki
was witnessing it right on the spot.

The muscular lummox looked like he was about to go down when Matsuda
grabbed Okamoto from behind to hold her down and distract her. "Now,
Ishiguro! Pound this bitch hard!"

Under normal circumstances, Seiko would've slipped away and smashed
Matsuda's face in with a well-placed elbow swing. However, the tall,
lanky basketball varsity played dirty by grabbing hold of her school-
renowned breasts and squeezed tight, which led her to yelp in surprise.

'Bastard!' thought Yamamoto as he scrabbled on the ground for leverage.

"Eeeek!" Okamoto couldn't help but scream as Matsuda fondled her
thoroughly. Meanwhile, Ishiguro cocked his fist back in order to
deliver a blow to the womb that would've given problems to Seiko in
terms of childbearing in the future... had a wheezing Tomoyuki not
jumped in time to intercept the punch with his own head.

"YAMAMOTO-KUN!"

In an instant, everything went dark for the Cherry Boy while Okamoto
shouted his name.


===


The next thing Yamamoto knew, Seiko was tending to the huge bump on
his forehead, his head on her soft, creamy thighs.

"Oh, thank goodness! I thought you were a goner, Yamamoto-kun!"

"Wow... Am I dreaming?"

Seiko blushed and pushed Yamamoto's head away from her lap. She then
apologized profusely for adding further injury to a person who got
knocked out by a punch aimed at her. "Sorry. You just woke up..."

Yamamoto laughed halfheartedly while gingerly raising his dizzy head.
"That's twice now that I've been beaten up by you."

"I'm really sorry!"

"It's quite all right. You can beat me up anytime."

"...What?"

"Uh, never mind." Tomoyuki cleared his throat. "So what happened to
Ishiguro and Matsuda?"

"Oh, those two idiots? I told them to screw themselves, and they
obliged," said Seiko while pointing her thumb from behind her, her fat-
lipped grin making her wince. "It serves that fat-headed pervert
right, feeling me up like that..."

Yamamoto tilted his head and body to the side to see what was behind
Okamoto. Sure enough, it was exactly as she'd described it: The black,
blue, and red Matsuda and Ishiguro where piled together like slabs of
swelling meat, Matsuda serving as the top half of the two's "sausage and
four meatball" sandwich, while Ishiguro was left at the bottom below him
(just like in real life).

Tomoyuki grabbed his mouth and stifled a chuckle. As expected of the
Amazon Quenn... Oh, wait, no. The Bully Hunter. This was the girl he
fell for in his first year in high school, right around the time Machida
rejected his advances to become more than just friends.

His face then grew warm again as he remembered the gentle look Seiko
gave him while his head lay on her warm lap. He then pinched his nose
for a nosebleed that never came to be (What was up with that old wives'
tale anyway?) He instead got an erection... morning wood from waking up,
to be more specific (although it wasn't strictly speaking morning).

Yamamoto then asked, "Aw, jeez. How long have I been out cold?" If he
got a hard-on in the afternoon, then he must've been out like a light
thanks to Ishiguro's punch. As expected of an amateur boxer who made it
to the finals of the boxing nationals.

Seiko blinked. "Not long. About two minutes, at most."

"Eeeeh? Then... it only took you two minutes to take them down?" No,
that wasn't what Yamamoto was concerned about. He felt a chill down the
nape of his neck that reached all the way to his spine.

"Enough games, Amazon Queen," a voice from behind the pair said.
Tomoyuki turned and look the other direction in time to see Kanemoto
headed their way.

"Aw, sheesh. I thought for sure that you ran away as soon as I made
short work out of your minions here," said the black-and-blue but still
ravishing Okamoto. She spat out a little bit of blood from her mouth,
then fell into her Zenkutsu Dachi or Front Stance Posture, which was her
way of baring her fangs. "Do you view yourself as some sort of final
boss or something, Pretty Boy?"

Before Kanemoto could speak, Seiko sprung into action, her arms a blur
as she attempted to take the last of the three bullies down. Her feint
was read and her punch landed smack-dab onto Kanemoto's waiting palm.
She winced as he harrumphed.

"I'm not like those other guys, Miss Captain of the Karate Club. If all
you're doing is take down beatable opponents, then you're a bully
yourself, are you not?"

"That's really fascinating, Mister Captain of the Judo Club. Are you
claiming that you can bully _me_ around by yourself?"

Her high kick missed, but her backhand was able to keep the judo captain
from capitalizing by grabbing hold of her leg and do a counter throw in
the form of a Sasae Tsurikomi Ashi.

She did a leg sweep, but he hopped away in time. He then attempted a
takedown as soon as she got up, but she stuffed it down and pushed him
away with a series of kicks and punches that mostly missed.

"Sei... OKAMOTO!"

The asthmatic Yamamoto attempted to run interference, but Kanemoto
merely swatted him away to the ground and continued to stalk Seiko with
waiting arms without missing a beat.

"Y-Yamamoto-kun!"

"What's the deal with you and Cherry Boy? I saw your number on his
phone. Why have you been calling him?"

"Wha...? How did you...?" Seiko's attempt at a karate chop... her Shuto
Uchi... missed by a mile, which allowed Kanemoto to pull her in a
clinch then attempt to throw her to the ground with a Uki Hoshi or
Floating Hip Throw.

Yamamoto was in the middle of getting up when he heard Kanemoto's words
that made him freeze like he'd seen Medusa's face herself. If this
conversation were to continue, then the truth about AU Seiko would be
exposed _at best_, or a misunderstanding between him and the real Seiko
would occur _at worst_.

Just when he was already making so much progress with her too! Not to
mention, he still had a lot of explaining to do to the AU Seiko after
their phone call earlier was rudely interrupted by his bullies.

With legs wobbly thanks to Ishiguro's megaton punch that knocked him
out cold earlier, Toshiyuki tried in vain to... well, he didn't know
what he was going to do exactly, but he sure hope it'd distract
Kanemoto long enough to let Seiko land a punch or something... before
the handsome captain of the Judo Club inadvertently exposed the fact
that _another_ Seiko had been calling him aside from the one in their
universe.

"You again? Don't you learn your...?" The brass knuckle that, Yamamoto
presumed, Seiko had taken off after she beat both Matsuda and Ishiguro
to a pulp, flew and hit Kanemoto right smack dab in between the eyes.

"AH! SON OF A BITCH! MY FACE!"

Yamamoto stumbled face-first unto the ground afterwards. "What? Who...?"
He picked himself up and turned in time to see Sugata leaning against
the wall, his hands behind the back of his head while he whistled.

The blond-haired Section 2B delinquent smirked and shrugged helplessly
at Yamamoto, Kanemoto, and Okamoto. "Hey, Motos!" he greeted the three
in light of the fact that their names all ended in "moto", "Sorry. My
bad. My hand slipped!"

Yamamoto's neck swung wildly from Seiko's blushing face to Sugata's
grinning one that it felt like it snapped in the middle of the extreme
movements. 'No. This can't be happening... Sugata again? He's always
going to be in my way, isn't he? N-NO! SEIKO-CHAN!'

Then Yamamoto woke up.


===


"WAH! You scared me!" chorused Seiko and Tomoyuki as they stared each
other from across the room. Well, it wasn't a perfect chorus; Yamamoto
wheezed his words more than said them.

"Oh, I got knocked out again?" he asked. "Ishiguro didn't hit me from
behind with that sledgehammer blow of his, did he?" he asked.

Seiko's lower lip quibbled as she went and checked Tomoyuki's
temperature... but not in the classic Rom Com Manga sort of way that
involved placing her forehead over his, to his chagrin. "I hope you're
not delirious or anything, Yamamoto-kun! I shouldn't have let you run
along with me. You should've told me you had asthma!"

"I thought the whole class knew," he murmured, his eyebrows furrowed and
his face flushed. "What about Matsuda and Ishiguro? You beat them up
real good. Why aren't they in the clinic?"

"No, I didn't. Why would I beat them up?"

"B-Because they jumped you while we were behind the swimming pool at the
edge off the soccer field, and..."

"Wait. You got it wrong, Yamamoto-kun. They're terrible bullies, but
why would they jump a girl? You're not seriously suggesting that they're
_that_ kind of people, are they?"

"B-But I saw you..." And that was the point where Yamamoto noticed the
lack of bruises and a busted lip on Okamoto. "Oh..." The parts where he
saw Seiko beating up Matsuda and Ishiguro like bad guys from a movie or
an animated series were probably all in his imagination, while he was
unconscious thanks to his severe asthma attack.

_Of course_ they didn't jump Seiko. Why would they? What benefit could
they possibly get from beating up one of the most popular girls in his
class, or even the entire second year? Even the most horrible of bullies
would have more common sense than that. Fights like that would have you
expelled from school, after all.

"You were only having a bad dream. While you were unconscious, you were
screaming out my name, and..." Seiko covered her mouth and looked away
from Tomoyuki.

Wordlessly, Okamoto rose up, went to Yamamoto's bedside, and began
setting up the nebulizer that he noticed just now. A nebulizer was a
machine designed to vaporize medicine for asthmatics to breathe in so
that they could get over their asthma attack.

As Tomoyuki looked at her quizzically, she explained, "Oh, the nurse
told me to give you this once you woke up. Don't worry, she taught me
how to use it."

Tomoyuki motioned for her to stop, saying, "Oh, don't bother, Okamoto. I
can do it by myself," in between wheezes.

"Oh. Okay, then."

For quite a while, they just sat there, with Seiko staring straight at
the wall while Tomoyuki inhaled the vaporized liquid bronchodilator
that, as its name suggested, widened his bronchial tubes and allowed him
to breathe better.

Fifteen minutes later, he switched off the machine... it still had a bit
of liquid medication on it, but he didn't care... and addressed Seiko,
stating, "I had the weirdest dream. I was being bullied by Matsuda and
company again when you showed up and we ran hand-in-hand away from
them and the forming crowd."

Okamoto tugged at her collar and ground her teeth. "Oh, no... _that_
actually happened," she said with a giggle, which made Tomoyuki blush
for various reasons.

"So I guess the karate fighting and the brass knuckles were all part of
my dream... but the asthma wasn't."

"I guess so. But wow, that was some dream you were having there," said
Seiko with a smirk. "I guess that asthma of yours is the reason why
you're always out of breath during PE Class..."

"Yeah. I usually take my medication around that time, but those assholes
really made me run... then you made me run..." Yamamoto choked on his own
spit at the memory of what really happened to him.

"I-I'm really sorry, I didn't know what else to do back there!" said
Okamoto in her defense, her hand on the top of her chest while Tomoyuki
avoided looking at her breasts as though they were twin suns of some
sort.

"N-No, it's quite all right..." he reassured her as he recovered from
his coughing fit and turned on the nebulizer once more. It hummed like
the motor of an aquarium pump near the Principal's Office inside the
Faculty Room. He turned it off two minutes later as the last remnants
of the medication sputtered into small clouds of vapor over his mouth.

Seiko spoke before he did this time around. "I did a stupid thing. Maybe
because our conversation the day before reminded me of my tomboyish self
back in middle school. Not that it's your fault or anything. Perhaps I
really should've punched Matsuda's lights out, like in your dream..."

"So we just ran away, huh?"

"Well..."

"Thank you for saving me."

"Maybe I shouldn't have done that?"

"No, you did nothing wrong."

Yamamoto turned to face the window and blinked back the moistness in his
eyes. What was he thinking, trying to confess to a girl like Seiko? How
could he even call himself a man after what happened? It was his crush
that saved him from harm. He couldn't even defend himself from Matsuda,
Ishiguro, or Kanemoto. They weren't his only bullies in the classroom,
at that.

It also made him sick to his stomach how he fantasized about Okamoto
saving him from his bullies to the point of beating them up for him.
Even in his dreams, he was utterly useless. His own mind knew that the
best he could do in a fight was to run interference and get knocked out.
What was wrong with him?

The only thing that allowed him to get close to Seiko in the first place
was the other Seiko from another universe. If it weren't for her help,
he'd be the same mostly harmless asthmatic nice guy that girls never
went for and jocks had fun bullying. His wish to stand out less from
being the infamous Cherry Boy was all but shattered thanks to Seiko
saving him from that trio of bullies, ironically.

Tomoyuki bowed low at Seiko, startling her. "Thank you very much for
what you did... Bully Hunter. I'm sorry for imposing on you. I wish I
was strong enough to stand up to those three. If it weren't for your
help, I don't know how much more trouble I would've ended up in. Really,
thanks a lot."

"Oh, quit it, Yamamoto-kun! You're embarrassing me!" said Seiko before
she punched Tomoyuki's arm. "Maybe those idiots learned their lesson and
will leave you alone this time around, huh?"

"I guess."

"It's also my way of making up for that horrible phone call I made the
other day."

"What? I was glad you called."

She bit her lip. "Were you really glad to talk to me about Furyou-kun?"

"...W-Why not? You're, like, the first girl who called me at home aside
from Machida. You can call me any time you want, Okamoto," was what he
said, although he was inwardly grateful that she realized how painful
their conversation was in her own way.

Yamamoto smiled wanly as he avoided Okamoto's probing eyes. Maybe he
shouldn't even be thinking about wooing this gorgeous, strong, and
tomboyish girl in the first place. His dream showed him the truth; the
person who deserved her love was someone like Sugata, not someone as
pitiful and pathetic as he was.

God dammit, why did he have to earn the nickname, "Cherry Boy" in the
first place? Why did he have to act so stupidly back then, with that
girl and her accidental text to him? No wonder even the girls that
friendzoned him never gave their numbers to him.

He got absolutely embarrassed in front of Seiko that day, firstly
because she had to bail him out from Matsuda's bullying, and secondly
because he fainted in front of her because of his asthma. Did he even
deserve to have a girlfriend?

"...You okay, Cherry Boy?"

"Yeah. I'm fine... Amazon Queen. Or is it Bully Hunter now?"

"HA! That was a one-time special appearance from my middle-school alter
ego. A girl my age can't afford to pull the stunts I used to do way back
when!"

"In retrospect, seeing you beat up boys back in my dream was something
you'd expect out of a TV show or comic book, wasn't it? What was I
thinking? What a stupid dream..."

"You were kind of delirious when I brought you here. You sure need to
exercise some more or something... No offense," giggled Seiko.

"Haha! N-None taken! I even imagined seeing you... well, _us_... get
rescued by Sugata from Kanemoto's clutches, as if Sugata were your
knight in shining armor and Kanemoto were the final boss! Who knew that
that was all a dream? Me and my overactive imagination, right?"

Their eyes met, and he had to take a step back from Seiko's wide eyes
of... Surprise? Shock? Disgust? Guilt? Regret? He couldn't tell. They
gulped as one as they both stared at somewhere aside from each others'
gazes.

"...Well, I guess we have to get back to class soon," he heard her say
all of a sudden. "Are you okay enough to go back?"

"Uh. Sure... I think my asthma has subsided enough." Was it his
imagination, or was she the one averting her gaze from his this time
around?

"To be honest, I don't even know what came over Kanemoto-kun and his
gang, with them getting all worked up over my phone call to you..."

'Oh, that's right. This all started because of AU Seiko's phone call to
me.' Come to think of it, he hadn't turned on his phone and explained to
the other Seiko what had happened yet. Dman, he wished he could call her
or text her somehow.

He hoped she wasn't mad over the whole ordeal. She was the only version
of Seiko he knew that loved him back, but in light of how pathetic he
was, did even deserve her love? Or was she instead in love with this
other version of him in her universe that was suave enough to make
both the Amazon Queen and the Class Rep of Section 2B fall for him?

He didn't know what to do or what to make of what had happened.


===


Back in Section 2B, just in time for the roll call...

Murmurs have always been a regular part of Tomoyuki's life ever since
the whole "Cherry Boy" thing started. Half of the time, he didn't even
notice them anymore. However, in this instance, the buzz of these harsh
whispers were so loud, that even the teacher noticed their
obnoxiousness.

"Quiet! Everyone, keep quiet! You're all like a bunch of bees, buzzing
around so irritatingly! Talk about whatever you want to talk about in
recess or something."

In deference to the Amazon Queen's wishes, she was the one who went in
first, followed by him a couple of minutes later. However, when he
arrived, all eyes remained on him and, unless his own eyes were seeing
things, on Seiko as well.

He still hadn't turned on his cell phone, at that. He really wanted to
call or email AU Seiko about what had happened and ask what was he
supposed to do.

As their English teacher (also) droned on and on about English's
opposing grammatical structure when compared to Japanese... English
speakers apparently went about it backwards, from how they read books
from left to right to the reverse  placement of the subject and
predicate... he felt the stares of the entire class bore down on him a
little stronger than usual.

Nearly every one of his classmates glared at him save Okamoto, who was
presently looking at anywhere and everywhere but his way. He then
realized that he himself should stop looking her way, or else she might
get into more trouble, such that people might misunderstand the
situation even more than usual. There was no doubt that everyone
misinterpreted what had happened back in the football field.

He glanced over Machida's seat in time to notice her staring at him too.
She quickly returned her bespectacled eyes to her notes, as though
nothing happened. Even Miku was embarrassed by how much of a spectacle
they were earlier, huh?

Time seemed to tick forever as teachers came and went. All the same, the
entire class... Wouldn't. Stop. Staring. At. Him.

What were they talking about? Didn't they have something better to do?

It was around the middle of the next to the last period that one of
Yamamoto's classmates finally had the courage to confront him about
what happened earlier. Funnily enough, it wasn't Ishiguro, Matsuda, or
Kanemoto who did so, because all three had decided to play hooky for
today.

It was Sugata himself instead. Sugata again. It was always Sugata, from
Yamamoto's nightmares to his reality. Wasn't it enough that the Yankee
won Machida's heart? Did he have to remain in Okamoto's as well? It
irritated Tomoyuki enough to want to punch the delinquent (for all the
good it would do).

Not that he stood a chance, of course. Ishiguro was a pushover compared
to Kazuhito.

"W-What is it, Sugata...?"

The blond-haired delinquent of the class grabbed hold of Yamamoto's head
and rubbed his knuckles raw over his noggin. The Cherry Boy's heart
stopped then and there. Like a wild animal, Kazuhito managed to put
Tomoyuki in a headlock as though the former sensed the latter's ill
intentions by instinct.

However, instead of being choked to death, the knuckle-rub noogie to the
forehead was apparently a congratulatory one. "I can't believe it! You
should've told us the good news! You should've seen the looks on those
three assholes' faces!"

"Eh?" Yamamoto blurted out before he felt a tap on his shoulder. He
turned his head in time to get his cheek poked by the Class Rep's
waiting finger while Sugata himself relinquished his grip.

"You rascal! I never thought you had it in you!"

"M-Machida..." Yamamoto trailed off as he seemingly deflated from the
finger poke. It had felt like weeks since he last talked to Miku. "Um,
what did you think I had in me?"

"Oh, you know what I mean!"

"No, I don't."

"Don't be so coy!"

"Seriously, what the heck are you guys talking about?"

He really was being coy, though. He knew exactly what they were talking
about. What else would the other people think after seeing the beautiful
Amazon Queen protect the pathetic Virgin King from his band of bullies?

It was like something out of a manga or anime that Machida loathed (she
liked her shows infested with pretty boys instead)... the ones where a
wimpy young man like him would be saved by a beautiful girl who was
skilled in martial arts.

Wasn't that the perfect dream scenario? Perhaps the real reason why
Yamamoto fainted after running hand-in-hand with Okamoto was because
his lungs couldn't contain his happiness. Yes, he still felt pathetic
that he couldn't defend himself against his bullies, but on the other
hand, Seiko making the save just before AU Seiko's identity was exposed
made him ecstatic.

While he was heading back to class, with Okamoto right in front of him,
his negative feelings started to fade from the realization that, for
good or for ill, he was able to run hand-in-hand with a girl earlier
that day. Although people would probably misunderstand what had
happened, he couldn't help but feel happy over the fact that they'd
think that the Cherry Boy had done it: He got the girl!

Shamed as he was to admit it, he couldn't help but feel good about the
whole debacle too, like it was a blessing in disguise for him. For the
first time, he liked being the center of attention, because it was
positive attention being directed to him instead of the usual negative
attention he got from being bullied as the section's designated Virgin
or Friend Zone King.

Perhaps she really did care for him. Maybe that phone call about Sugata
was her trying to sort out her feelings for _him_ instead. The idea made
his heart flutter. This was exactly why he got a kick out of what
Kazuhito told him next.

"It's too bad you somehow ended up in the clutches of that tranny,
Cherry Boy. There's no accounting for taste, I guess. I don't envy you,
but congrats all the same."

"Whoa! Furyou-kun accepts defeat!"

"Wah! Tell me this isn't so, Sugata-kun! You and Seiko were meant to
be!"

Tomoyuki's hand automatically went to the back of his head as his
classmates hooted and hollered at him. Even though there was a hint of
mocking and disbelief in the applause, his heart couldn't help but feel
as if it were on cloud nine.

"He's like the Train Man, isn't he? He's a virgin who somehow snagged a
keeper!"

By "Train Man", that random classmate meant the popular franchise wherein
an otaku from 2ch (a message board on the Internet) related his story of
defending a beautiful young lady from a drunk while inside a train (hence
his name), which somehow had him end up her knight in shining armor. He
later won her over despite being such a dreg of society.

"I still don't believe it. There must be some sort of mistake..."

"What mistake? She grabbed hold of his hand and they ran off together.
What are people supposed to think?"

"You sure aim your sights high, Cherry Boy!"

"Should he even be called Cherry Boy anymore?"

"Well, yeah. Nobody popped his cherry yet. Don't put the cart before the
horse!"

A red-faced Machida then did a one-eighty from her earlier, cheerier
demeanor and screamed... well, yelped... at the class, "Don't even joke
about that!"

"Hoo! Class Rep is jealous!"

"Yamamoto went from being the Virgin King to the Mack Daddy!"

Kazuhito then whispered to Tomoyuki, "Even though Amazon Queen is a bit
on the immature side, I hope you'll be able to take good care of her...
or else I'll beat you up even harder than those three bullies could."

"E-heh. I'll keep that in mind."

As Sugata turned around, he didn't know what hit him. The palm print on
his face was so deep, it included all the wrinkles and markings of the
hand that produced it.

"A-Amazon...?"

Yamamoto rose from his seat, his lips quivering. Still, Seiko's eyes
couldn't meet his. Or rather, she refused to meet his eyes, he realized.

"You're unbelievable. Why are you always like this?" growled Seiko as
she turned around in a huff and strode towards the door.

"W-Wait, Seiko-chan! We still have one more subject to go before
dismissal!" called out Machida.

"...I'm not feeling very well, Miku-chin. Can you tell the teacher I had
to go home early because of a headache? Thanks."

"Sei-kun! What's going on...?" As Sugata attempted to run after Okamoto,
she did a reverse kick straight to the gut that kept him at bay. She
harrumphed.

"I missed," Yamamoto heard her mutter before opening the door, exiting
the classroom, and sliding it shut without ceremony.

Even the crickets and cicadas didn't bother singing after witnessing
what had happened.

As Tomoyuki sat back down, he wished he could slam his head repeatedly
on his desk. What the hell was he thinking? _Of course_ she was still in
love with Sugata. Did he already forget that conversation they had on
the phone the other day? Was he really that clueless?

It was when Kazuhito recovered from the blow and ran off towards Okamoto
that the classroom exploded in an uproar of sorts, which made the soft-
spoken Class Rep have a hard time calming everyone down.

"As expected of Cherry Boy!"

"What's this? What's this? What's this? A love triangle?"

"Oh, come on. What rock have you been sleeping under? Amazon Queen is in
love with Furyou-kun! He's her childhood sweetheart!"

"I knew that rumor about Cherry Boy snagging her was bullshit."

"It's a love triangle! No girl in her right mind would try and rescue
Cherry Boy while he's being harassed by Matsuda and company unless she
wants to be harassed herself as Cherry Boy's girlfriend!"

"Ew, Cherry Boy's girlfriend! That's a fate worse than death! You know
how many girls he confessed to during the first year? It's like he's a
love letter addict!"

"No, you got it all wrong. Okamoto helped Cherry Boy out... as a friend.
He's still the Friend Zone King."

"Wait, I thought Cherry Boy was dating the Class Rep."

"Don't be ridiculous. She friendzoned him too, like all the rest of the
girls he wooed."

"Well, none of the girls that friendzoned Cherry Boy would've helped him
out with those three bullies!"

"Don't you know? Back in middle school and up until first year, the
Amazon Queen was known as the Bully Hunter. She actually beat up boys
with her bare fists! She had no intention of dating that loser, she
only saved him because he was so weak and pathetic!"

"No, man. I told you it was a misunderstanding. There was no way Cherry
Boy could've ended up dating the Amazon Queen! He's Cherry Boy, after
all."

"Yeah, I knew something smelled fishy. Yamamoto was grinning like an
idiot all this time, and he wouldn't deny the truth."

"Hey, I thought Sugata and you were dating, Class Rep!"

"Who told you that? No one's dating anyone!" half-shrieked, half-pleaded
Machida to that last remark.

Thanks to Tomoyuki's insensitivity and his desperate need to have Seiko
reciprocate his feelings for her, the Amazon Queen was forced to
listen to his childhood friend and crush ramble on about an unconfirmed
rumor regarding him and Okamoto.

Most disgustingly, Yamamoto never bothered to correct those assumptions
at all. Maybe he really did deserve all the bullying he got up until
now.


===


Listless and exhausted, Tomoyuki walked back to his home after a long
commute.

He still couldn't turn on his phone. He was afraid that the real Seiko
might call... or rather, might not call, because she hated his guts
yet again.

Real life didn't work that way. Even with all these interdimensional
shenanigans going on, the reality of the situation was that Cherry Boy
hadn't changed one bit. He was still out of the Amazon Queen's league,
and her crush from _this_ dimension was in love with someone else
altogether.

He wanted to turn on his phone, but he couldn't. Even if the version of
Seiko that liked him... the one that was actually calling him... was
from another universe, she was still Seiko. He didn't feel like facing
either version of the Amazon Queen right now.

"YAMAMOTO-KUN! YAMAMOTO-KUN!"

"Eh? Machida...?"

Tomoyuki averted his eyes as the glasses-wearing Class Rep bounced all
over the place while running towards him. "W-What do you want?" He
almost asked if Sugata left her for Okamoto out of bitterness, but the
words died in his throat as he saw the look in her eyes.

"Want to grab a bite to eat?" she asked with that kind, unassuming smile
of hers that once made him fall for her the first time they met.

As always, the Class Rep came through for him. His guardian angel.
Ironically, her friendzoning of him was the best thing that happened to
him in quite a while, he realized.

He'd served as the secret keeper of the fact that she was a fujoshi
since then. Most importantly, she became the best friend he never had.

"Yeah. I wasn't able to eat lunch. Let's do that. My treat."

"Ah, ah, ah! We pay for our own meals. This isn't a date."

He chuckled. "Yes, ma'am."


===


Next: Terrible misunderstandings.

Well, it wouldn't be a romantic comedy without some terrible
misunderstandings, now would it?

Farewell,
Abdiel
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