[FFML] [fanfic][Draft 2][Marvel][Chapter 1] Ultimate Boom-Boom

[Gary Kleppe]

Ragman Jack <studiopc at sbcglobal.net> wrote it.

I'm not sure where this is going. The best opportunity for conflict  
looks like Tabitha/BB trying to fit in to her new "straight" work life  
while having to worry about the mutant detector and the anti-mutant  
crusaders trying to exploit the company. Will she have to choose  
between keeping a low profile and hoping not to be found out, or  
acting against criminal activity that could do real harm, if not to  
her than to people like her? If that's in store than it could be very  
interesting.

On the other hand, I thought all of the character stuff may have been  
a bit much. In stuff like this what I look for are aspects of the  
protagonist's character that will help her get into trouble, or help  
her deal with trouble when it arises, or both.

Anyway, looking forward to more. And now for some mechanical stuff.  
First the obligatory typo correction:


> "You do this, and we can garuntee that some very powerful people

guarantee


There's also a few places where there's extra spacing for no apparent  
reason. Here's a few of them:


> Granger 's expression didn't change, but he nodded slightly
          ^

> She'd stopped practicing two years ago, and it  had bit
                                                  ^

> Otherwise, if it ain't  Grungecore, don't care."
                          ^

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