[FFML] [Mai Hime, Future] The Summer of Her Discontent 4--To Bear What Must Be Borne

[Bert Miller]

Last lap.  Now I suppose we have weeks or months to wait for either 
"Roger" or some other next story.

This took a little while; I kept getting side-tracked with too much 
side-speculation.

John Biles wrote:
>     "Just remember, no nookie until you're at least as old as your mother
> was when she first did it," Dad said, smiling.
>
>     "So, seventeen, then," I said, grinning.
>
>     Mom mumbled something incoherent and Dad said, "Just be glad you'll be
> of majority before you reach the age I was."
>
>     "Was Mom your first?" I asked, surprised.
>
>     Dad mumbled something incoherent.
>
>     I'm not waiting THAT long.
>   
Heh.

>     Dad and Aunt Mikoto were in their workout clothes, which is to say as
> casual as Dad ever gets.  He and Mom both love to dress up and are totally
> vain about it, though they'd never admit it.  Aunt Mikoto, on the other
> hand, only dresses up for fancy occasions.
>   
This detail surprised me about Yuiichi.  In the series, he's usually in 
his school uniform, and kind of sloppily so.
It doesn't seem to really fit with his "utter lack of a hairstyle".

> from this and stay on the sidelines, living in fear.  You are right.  We do
> all lose sometimes."  She shivered and I wondered what she had lost.  "Real
> strength isn't never getting knocked down, it's getting back up when you
> do."
>   
Well said.  This is what really impresses about Mai in the series: that 
she takes the blows and comes
back for more.  She surprised first Ishigami and later the O.L. in this 
respect.

>     Aunt Mikoto suddenly swallowed all her coffee and said quickly,
> "Crystal's roommate and suitemates are here, trying to sleep."
>   
Heh.  Probably not very successfully, with people screaming about 
'monster attacks' in their suite...

> Natasha's Tale:
>
> Mom's boyfriend of the time, George.  Or was he Fred?
Red-haired and British?

>   Anyway, whatever his
> name was, he was a redhead like Mom and I
Heh.  I guess so.

>  and he liked emeralds and other
> green gems and gave Mom and I jewelry to that effect.  He claimed it was
> magical, but I think that was just him teasing me.
>   
Not sure how much I'd trust a gift from George or Fred...

> not dead.  Unless...no, there was no way she could be talking about my
> actual Father.
>   
BTW, you said something about Natasha finding out about her father in 
this story somewhere?  Where?
Or did you just mean finding out what Shiho thinks of him?

> to be over.  But Yuuichi offered to take the baby himself.  Mai was pregnant
> with Crystal and it would have been easy to pass you two off as twins."  I
> was born the day after Crystal.
>   
Natasha said in 'Road Trip' that, if they were both Yuichi's daughters, 
Crystal would be her younger
sister, not older.  Unless you have a specific reason to change it, 
suggest "I was born the day before Crystal".

> paused, then said, "I think whoever turned the snakes loose must have been
> who I thought was stalking me."
>   
When was this?  Did I forget something, or is this a stray from an 
abandoned draft?

>     "He can't even keep his mouth shut about fantasizing about the two of us
> together in bikinis," she said.  "You think he could keep this secret?"
>   
Heh.

> Aoi's Tale:
>
>     I woke up and went out to make everyone breakfast.  Chie mumbled
> something incoherent about helping me, but I left her and Erica still
> sprawled across each other.  Erica was mumbling about finding tasty leaves.
>   
Dreaming of her elephant.  How sweet.

> Shun's Tale:
>
>
> siblings.  But the Principal is in her forties, I think, which I guess means
> she might still have some nieces around our age," Kagami said.
>   
So the Principal as well as the Vice-Principal is definitely younger 
than she should be. 

I'm not sure what to make of the Principal, but it occurs to me that 
maybe you didn't intend
all the stuff which confuses me:  "auburn ponytail" AND "glasses"; 
"kind" AND "tennis";
no mention at all of, say, an indicative forehead or a particular shade 
of skin or relatives
running a particular robotics firm.  It's as if you're conflating two 
different characters here.
I don't think the Regent proves anything either way, given that the 
event discussed in Part 3
apparently occurred when they were in high school.

> most people were sitll in bed.  Or malingering around their dorm.
>   
(SP) "still", not "sitll".

> Kasumi's Tale:
>
>     He was wearing a suit when I came down, and he looked very worried.
> "Hey, I heard from your mother that you quit the track team."
>
>     I stared at the ground, wondering what he thought.  "Yeah, I'm too busy
> for it," I said.
>   
Kasumi using "yeah" rather than just "yes"?  Or maybe "yes, I did.  I'm 
too busy...""
>     "I had an emergency meeting," he said.  "Ms. Johnson is napping in the
> car in the parking lot."
>
>     "What's wrong?" I asked.
>
>     He laughed nervously.  "Now I feel a hypocrite, as I can't talk about it
> myself.  There was trouble with some business rivals."
>   
Hmm... in the same timeframe as Roger's client lost half-a-ship's worth 
of mechs to pirates.
Not a good sign, but not enough to draw any conclusion.

>     "Yes," he said.  "Though half of it consisted of me listening to this
> tech woman spew words I didn't understand.  Ms. Johnson has a sister,
> Harmony, who works in the tech department of US Robots.  Her Japanese was
> good, but it was all words I never use and don't know."
>   
And we still don't know why on Earth "US Robots and Mechanical Men, Inc" 
would be part of
a consortium working on a new solar power project.  On the other hand, 
if this is not what the
project is really about, why would Shell Solar be involved?  I suppose 
it's possible that the
large number of solar panels said to be involved needs its own automated 
maintenance force,
which most participants wanted to make sure would be completely 
harmless, but somebody has
a different idea...

>     "That's just for in private," Uncle Yuuichi said dryly.
>
>     "I still don't understand how I got stuck under the bed that time," Aunt
> Mikoto said.
>   
Heh.

> Crystal's Tale:
>
> you.  Knowing they'd been made to turn on each other made me very
> uncomfortable; I had been assuming one big happy team, but...
>   
Even if she is only sixteen, Crystal is the daughter of a business 
consultant specializing in
corporate reorganizations.  (Check out the Wikipedia page on "Forming, 
storming,
norming, performing" for a concept Mai would have to be thoroughly familiar
with.)  Crystal has heard lots about her father's job, and even took
the trouble to read up in the area; she must have heard shop-talk from 
her mother
as well, sometimes about the conflicts that happen during the formation 
of new teams.

This reflection, attributed to Kasumi or Natasha, makes a lot of sense 
to me, but I
think Crystal would have to be thinking about things a bit differently.  
Maybe switching
an internal pointer away from "happy sentai teams" to "Mom's real world 
stories".

>     "One of our biggest sources of trouble was Nagi, a servant of the
> Obsidian Lord," Mom said.
>
>     Nagi...Nagisa...  "Nagi. What did he look like?"
>
>     Mom described him to me and I suddenly wanted to just douse myself in
> gasoline and burn myself.  "Short, junior high...teal hair."
>   
Heh.

>     "He goes to school and was helping me investigate the events at Fuuka,"
> I said, burying my face in my hands in utter frustration with myself.  "He's
> probably also Kei and he's been totally playing me and I am going to kill
> him."
>
>     "He's probably also 'Kei', then," Kasumi said, explaining Kei for
> everyone.
>   
Crystal already said that.

>     "It looked like it," Aunt Midori said, then frowned.  "I suppose
> anything that didn't fell into the ocean and washed out to sea.  It would be
> gone by now."
>   
Meaning we'll see such pieces play a piece in the story.  Or maybe they 
already have; I think
we've already seen a color match.

>      Aunt Shizuru swept in.  "It is my fault."
>
>     "Shizuru," Mom said.  "You don't..."
>
>     "I do," Shizuru said.  "I killed everyone in Primus.  Everyone who
> died.
Points to Shizuru for this.  I can't have been easy.

BTW, it occurred to me at some point that one of the kids might confront 
Shizuru and ask her
why she didn't turn herself into the police (not necessarily 
confrontationally; given what happens
later, I could see Crystal or Natasha doing so more out of 
desperation).  At any rate, it occurred
to me that Shizuru might very well have done so:  walked into a police 
station, a few weeks
later, and confessed to killing the entirety of Primus Research, by 
herself, with the help of her
giant squid, which unfortunately she could no longer show to the 
police.  They'd throw her
out, of course.  Then, if sufficiently depressed, she might study up on 
terrorist tactics books
from the library, and try again a year or two later, only to have the 
police pull her first
confession out of a file cabinet, together with her library records, and 
throw her out again.
At this point, even the most conscientious perpetrator would have to 
give up.

> hate me, Kagami, you have the right.  I...I killed so many and I didn't even
> know their names.  It's all a blur.  But if your mother's first husband died
> there, then I am to blame and I am sorry.  Your mother is on the Primus
> Survivor's Fund, right?"
>
>     "Yes, it pays my tuition to go to Rosewood and it will be paying to send
> me to college too," Kagami mumbled.  "You set that up?"
>   
You're generally using "mumbled" a lot in this story.  Here in 
particular, I'd suggest using another word
or phrase, perhaps "replied slowly."  'Mumbled' implies that listeners 
have a hard time understanding,
and is fine for embarrassing admissions, but this isn't one.

> But you will.  You possess great power which will only grow stronger.  And
> power corrupts."
>
>     "Lord Acton," Dan said.
>
>     Power corrupts Lord Acton?  Who is Lord Acton?
>
>     Aunt Shizuru blinked at him, then said, "What?"
>
>     "He's a historian famous for saying power corrupts and absolute power
> corrupts absolutely," Dan said.
>   
This doesn't seem like Dan to me.  Who's he trying to impress?  Everyone 
present knows that
he knows his history.  Just offer the quote the first time, and skip the 
attribution.

> But we promise, we will do our best to be responsible with our powers and
> keep the family secrets.  We will make you proud of us and help defend
> everyone from all the gods and demons that may rise against us.  May the
> Crystal Princess be our witness."  The others repeated what I had said, and
> I felt a sudden jolt in my new tattoo.  Aunt Akane and Aunt Akira jumped as
> well.
>   
So this new promise did SOMETHING.

> much good, though Sakomizu-sensei, Aoi and Chie are all close by and armed
> for trouble."
>   
So Mai is going to trust Sakomizu-sensei, and she assumes he knows 
everything Aoi and Chie do?
And how does she know he's armed?

Actually, now that I think of it, it's just as possible he's really 
working for Fumi as for anyone else,
and you just haven't had occasion to mention it.

>     "Oh yes," Mom said.  "One more thing."  She let go of Aunt Shizuru,
> clicking up a slide.  "The Sears Foundation. They possess the technology to
> create artificial Hime, using it to create Alyssa and Miyu." 
Implying to the kids that Miyu is an artificial Hime.  Do none of the 
kids question the mismatch
on numbers?  That would make sixteen.

>     My curiosity warred with the part of me which now didn't want to know
> more.  God, they fucked up so much.  Can we really do better?  We have to do
> better.  I have to do better.  Or else they will have been right.  We have
> to show them we can handle this and do better than they did.
>   
Nice reflection on Crystal's part, potentially charitable (especially if 
she does end up screwing
up badly).

> Kasumi's Tale:
>
>     So he wants people like Ayumi-sempai, I thought, then told myself to be
> less uncharitable.
>   
Heh.

> was pretty thoroughly smashed up and turned into a campfire pit, but we
> found a small amount of an odd reddish-pink crystalline substance which Miyu
> thinks..."  She frowned.  "It seems to basically be solidified spiritual
> power."
>   
Gee, where could it have come from?

>     "Nagi," Aunt Haruka said.  "Five will get you ten it's that bastard Nagi
> in disguise.  Was he eating expensive Italian Sorbet?  Lime flavored?"
>
>     "No," I said.  "Why would he be eating ice cream?"
>
>     "Ahah!" Crystal said.  "That time you came over to our house in the
> middle of the night, was that Nagi stealing your ice cream?"
>
>     "Hell yes," Aunt Haruka said.  "Do you know how much that stuff costs to
> import from Italy?  You'd think a country with over a hundred billion people
> could make decent sorbet, but no, I have to import it."
>   
Heh.

> Jinnai's Tale:
>
>     I only made it back in time because Ms. Johnson drove like a maniac.  It
> was my own fault for sleeping later than I planned.  "You really didn't have
> to drive me all the way back; I could have taken the train," I told her.
>   
She drove him from Osaka to Tokyo?  Wouldn't that be, like, six hours 
minimum?  When he could have gotten there
in less than half that time by train?  (Shin Osaka to Tokyo Station is 
under two and a half hours by Shinkansen.)

It doesn't seem to serve any purpose to the story; just have him take 
the train.  Or conceivably have
her double as a private pilot if she has to be here for some reason.

>     "Mr. Smith?" I asked.
>
>     Mr. Smith was a grey haired old man, somewhere in his seventies, I
> think.  He wore a nice, but out of date charcoal colored suit and a red tie
> with grey circuit patterns on it.  He saw me looking at the tie and said,
> "One of my granddaughters gave it to me.  She works in electronics.  Yes, I
> am."
>   
No mention of the beak-like nose?  Even for an American, John Smith has 
a real beak.

>     "So what have you found out about what happened at Fuuka in 2005?" I
> said, getting right to the point.
>   
...that he didn't already know...
>     He produced two more pictures, showing the dog-robot blowing up what
> looked to me like parked military trucks, along with a picture of Ms. Kuga
> beating up US Army soldiers.  "She fought the occupation of Fuuka by US Army
> forces too."
>   
The soldiers are now supposed to have been official U.S. Army, instead 
of the private force
there were described as at the time?  The soldiers themselves told 
Shizuru and others that they had
been asked in by the Japanese government (which U.S. forces would have 
to have been), but the
soldiers don't say they're U.S. forces, and we don't see any U.S. 
insignia in the series itself, and
Yamada said they were a private Searrs force (which we know they were 
from Searrs own
actions).

Now, after the fact, what would the situation have been described as?  
Given that no witnesses
could testify to U.S. insignia on uniforms or vehicles, I'd think it 
would be easiest on all parties
involved to conclude that it was a rogue mercenary corporation, possibly 
of U.S. origin, but hired
by persons unknown.  Everybody could have their own conspiracy theory 
about who, of course:
the Japanese government, covering up supposed incompetence in the SDF 
(unable to deploy
for whatever reason); the U.S. government, in a hurry and not willing to 
wait for a Japanese
invitation (say because the 'plague virus' was originally stolen from a 
U.S. government
laboratory); the soldiers were the real terrorists all along; etc, etc.

>     Only to be replaced by the woman who in this picture is just her maid.
> IE, the woman who was probably really in charge all along, using this girl
> as a disposable proxy to take the fall when everything went to hell.  I
> grimaced at Himeno Fumi.  What a disgusting woman.
>   
Heh.

>     He pulled out another file folder with stapled photocopies from several
> journals.  "All published research connected to Primus concerned itself with
> human augmentation," Mr. Smith said, passing them to me.  "Human
> augmentation.  Making people faster, stronger, healthier, and so on."
>   
You have a repeat of "human augmentation" there.  And is this true?  It 
wouldn't be that hard for
Jinnai to check this claim, but I'd have thought there might be other 
topics.  Artificial Childs would
emphasize robotics research.

> Kasumi and now after both of them visited Fuuka, suddenly Kasumi was so fast
> I think she could set a world record or at least come close.
So he didn't really understand what he was looking at; he's 
underestimating Kasumi badly.  If he
suspects secret research, should his presuppositions be getting in the 
way, though?  Suggest
"..could set a world record, maybe shatter one."

>     "But you don't know specifics," I said.
>   
Heh.  Wanna bet?

>     "Most of the records were destroyed when 'Kiyohime' wiped out everyone
> there.  It took me substantial effort to find these photos,
"I had to go back into my personal files from 23 years ago."

>     A very good investigator.  He'd been recommended to me by Mr. Robert
> Cooper, one of the men I work with who is employed by US Robots.  He said
> Mr. Smith did top of the line work and I had to agree.
>   
This Robert Cooper is certainly showing up a lot.

> said.  He pulled out another file folder.  "We know that all the girls at
> Fuuka underwent medical examination during the army occupation, but not the
> boys.  It seems rather likely to me that the whole 'terrorists with plague'
> story was, in fact, an excuse to search for girls with certain qualities or
> maybe even specific girls."  He showed me several pictures of girls lined up
> to be checked by doctors.  "Some families eventually sued, but were paid
> hush money."
>   
Smith is sticking remarkably close to the truth here.

But who did these families sue?  Who paid?

>     Another picture.  I knew this woman vaguely by reputation, though we'd
> never met face to face.  Tate Mai.  "Tate Mai," I said.
>   
Suggest getting rid of the repetition, keeping the quoted instance.

> skilled pianist and gives concerts periodically.  She has released two
> records.  I have them on my MusicBox, in fact."  He pulled out the small
> widget and played a short snippet.
Given that this is 2028, suggest he simply plays the short snippet via 
his phone, on demand.

> vice versa.  But if it had been a one way crush...no wonder she was willing
> to take on an entire facility by herself in order to rescue Akane.
>   
Or maybe you're badly overestimating how risky the whole venture was for 
Natsuki, i.e.
underestimating the level of her enhancements.  Of course, you're 
thinking in terms of what
you've heard or read might be technologically feasible.

>     "Purely a coincidence," Mr. Smith said.  "Nearly three million Americans
> are named Smith; it's the most common family name in our mutual homeland.
> Smith and Waynewright seem to have come to Japan and attended Tokyo
> University a decade ago, but have no previous presence in Japan.
Heh.  Any previous presence anywhere else?

Attended Todai?  Interesting; this would kind of imply they showed up in 
Tokyo looking 18-ish,
and have been aging normally since.

>   Whatever
> happened at Fuuka, I don't think they're connected to it, other than now
> being tied to Kuga Natsuki and Fujino Shizuru.  Who I will note set up a
> large fund for the surviving family members of those who died at Primus.
> She's from very old money, and she seems to have devoted her whole life to
> peace activism and being a Negotiator ever since college, and to some degree
> since high school."
>
>     Something is going on here, even if I can't quite figure out the whole
> story.
Not sure why; given what John Smith has been saying, it's pretty easy to 
conclude that Shizuru,
at the very least, must have been involved with 'Kiyohime'.  It could 
easily occur to Jinnai that
Akane, who he's worried about, need not have participated simply because 
she was experimented
on; need not have even known about the incident ahead of time, but 
merely learned of it later,
and not been willing to turn in, the participants.  Which all happens to 
be true, actually.

> fear my brother and Akane are tangled up in it and...  They aren't aging.
> Had Primus discovered some sort of aganathic?  All the way back in the
> 2000s?
Heh.

>   We have had some success retarding aging, but we're still working on
> it.  But if it only works for people with the right DNA...
...then clearly 'Kiyohime' will be persecuted once they're unmasked, so 
they'd better steal an experimental
starship and flee the solar system.  (And maybe take Haruka's nanotech 
Hime technology with them.)

>     "Munakata Shiho, mother of Munakata Natasha, who goes to school with
> your neice,
(SP) still misspelling 'niece'.

>     "I will see what else I can find," he said.  "I'm rather confused myself
> by all this.
I doubt that VERY much.

Though I find I'm not sure what Smith is up to.  Maybe he's a real 
free-lance investigator now,
and he's doing his best for Jinnai while hiding only his own past?  He's 
almost being honest enough for
that; his only outright lie I could see concerns the bridge, and he's 
being as honest there as he could
be consistent with hiding his own past (Jinnai couldn't possibly falsify 
his statements on the bridge
without discovering the entire truth, including Smith's own background, 
first).

OTOH, his order of presentation could be construed as trying lead lead 
Jinnai to a specific
conclusion, without any possibility of comeback.

> Only a few companies could afford to make something like that, but if Fujino
> was old money...
Smith didn't mention Haruka and/or Yukino?

> Gin's Tale:
>
>     I was just trying to eat lunch when suddenly a swarm descended upon me.
> To be precise, it was Hayao, Mandi, Sanae and Hotaru.
"Mandi was trying to dress fairly hot, but really, she's too short.  
Sanae was dressed too conservatively
to be hot.  Hotaru, however, would have been way hot if she'd been less 
groggy."

>     Hotaru now drank my coke.  "So tired," she mumbled.
>   
You know, pretending to be a fake vampire would be GREAT cover for a 
real one...

>     "Don't worry, I'm sure it'll be safe," Hotaru said confidently.
>   
Interesting that Hotaru is so confident.  And without even mentioning 
snakes..

>     "Any conclusions?" I asked.
>
>     "Not as much as, say, Kasumi, does, but enough to substantially reduce
> the impact's effect on you.
Not as much what?  The sentence is missing something.

>     I hit Aunt Miyu with everything I had, right in the chest.  Then I
> stumbled back, wringing my hand.  "OW."
>   
Heh.  Still no questions about Miyu from the kids?

>     "You're a heroine, not a sinner," Kasumi said, resting her head on Aunt
> Miyu's shoulder.  "You probably saved our lives last night."
>   
??? From persuading Kasumi to want to get stronger ???

> intimacy.  So your love will grow.  Love needs a balanced diet, just like
> you do."
>
>     I nodded, wishing I could take notes.
>   
Words fail me.

>     Aunt Haruka said, "I will see about having them made.  If the
> nanomachine project works, we may be able to give you artificial Hime
> powers, but it's having some problems."
>
>     "Causing people to mutate into hideous monstrosities?" I teased.  I know
> that doesn't ever really happen.
>
>     "No, they break down when exposed to very much testosterone,"
Argh!  Another otome-ism.  Though this one isn't bad; almost worth a 
quick chuckle.

> crushed and smashed up and rough.  The other side of it was cleanly sliced
> as if someone had somehow smoothly sliced the granite with a blade.'
> 'sliced, as if someone had somehow cut the granite with a very sharp blade.
> The top of it was a chunk of chinese writing.  So was the bottom.
>   
You have the almost the same phrase repeated twice here.

>     In a few places under the piled rubble, there was pinkish-red powder,
> which Sanae collected into an envelope, using a hair brush from Hotaru's
> purse.
Good luck analyzing leftover Hime star chunks.  OTOH, maybe possession 
of them will have
some interesting effects on you...

>     "Yes, but we can't ask Dan," Hayao said.  "Dan is inside the secret and
> we are not.  He won't tell us."  He frowned.
>   
Nobody here has any solid reason to believe that this inscription has 
anything to do with the family secret,
though.  In fact, if they suspect it did, asking Dan might be the best 
way to find out for sure:  if
he clams, it does; otherwise, it doesn't.

> these mushrooms?"  I pointed to some purple mushrooms which now bloomed
> around the edge of the clearing.
>
>     "It's not just you," she said frowning.  She pulled up two of the
> mushrooms, putting them in a small bag.  "I can try and look these up."
>   
Or maybe possession of these will have some interesting effects...

I liked this scene with Gin, Hotaru, and the cousins, btw; nice to see 
them in action.  Pretty
competent detective work, too.

> Crystal's Tale:
>
>     "I...Aunt Miyu said to tell you about my Child," I said a little
> nervously.
>   
Why is Crystal nervous about talking to Mikoto, whom she's lived with 
her whole life?
This reads too much, I think, like all the other sessions, where people 
are more-or-less
meeting each other for the first time.

>     "Oooh, yes!  She said he's some kind of giant robot monk?"
>   
When did Miyu see it?

> Sanae's Tale:
>
>     I could hardly believe that.  I mean, Taiki's never been a pacifist, but
> giving someone a brutal beating like that is totally unlike him.
More evidence something's up with Taiki.

>   I really
> gave him a piece of my mind but it didn't work.  We've all tried, but it
> just doesn't seem to get through his anger for very long.  Hopefully,
> Ayumi-sempai will make him feel better.
>   
Heh.  Until Ayumi gets possessed by something.

> like that.  Especially since I couldn't find those mushrooms in any of Dad's
> reference works in his office or in my usual online databases.  They glow in
> the dark, but I couldn't figure out why.
>   
Heh.

>     And if I understand the test I ran, I think they cause hallucinations.
>   
Or maybe what you think you hallucinated really happened...

>     I half-jumped out of my skin.  She'd been a good ways over at our usual
> table when I came over here.  "Hey, Kasumi," I said.
>   
Somebody's going to notice Kasumi doing that.

> us alive.  "The idea that I'm getting power from a star makes me boggle."
>
>     "It's just hard to believe it's all real."
>
>     "It's not so hard for us because of the things we saw at Fuuka, but it's
> strange to be inside it, living it, instead of watching it from the
> outside," Chie-Mom said.
>   
Now Chie sounds like she actually saw quite a bit more than Mai probably 
thought she had at the time.

>     I was such an idiot, being suckered by Nagisa.  I had pretty much
> trusted him implicitly, but he'd pretty much led me around by the nose.
> Even if I couldn't figure out exactly what he was trying to accomplish or
> why he did it that way.  Though from the things I knew now, his mother and
> his likely father were both manipulators.
>   
Even if he did fool Crystal, none of it ended up hurting her.

> homework and I don't even know how much use I actually am.  Aunt Miyu
> totally had to save our asses.
>   
??? "Aunt Akira and Aunt Akane totally had to save our asses."

>     It would be so easy to just summon my sword and beat the shit out of
> these damn liars.
>
>     A second later, I realized what I'd just thought and felt utterly
> horrified with myself.
Heh.  Sixteen year olds, with this kind of power.  Not a good 
combination.  Could be worse, of
course; it could be the K twins.

> such a failure.  I thought I would be all awesome and I wasn't.  And there's
> so much I was counting on them to know and they don't.
Exactly.

> had worked well enough to get us there.  Or the Crimson Huntsman would be
> using as hostages.  Or worse.
>   
Missing an "us" after "using".

> wasn't much use, really.  The others had to save us, and then Aunt Miyu had
> to save us all.
>   
And again with the Aunt Miyu saving the day.  This must be a relic of an 
old draft or something; too
many occurences to be accidental.

> Kasumi's Karma:
> Avenger into battle.  I am the eldest of the Hime, and I am ready to fight
>   
Suggest "eldest of the Younger Hime"

> for my world with my family and my friends.  I am ready to race with comets
> and tornados and the stars in their courses.
>
>     My name is Kurauchi Kasumi.
>
>     And I am no longer afraid
Beginning and ending with Kasumi; nice symmetry.