Author's note at end. C&C welcome.
> This is an old project of mine that I was going to do for NaNoWriMo
> '04 and it never got past chapter 1. Got to thinking about it lately,
> went through, fixed it up, and thought I post it here, just to see
> what people think and if there's anything I missed. Should I
> continue? What?
Okay, good first draft of a first chapter, I think. The pace drags in
places, some imagery is a little thin, but nothing a little polish
wouldn't hurt. That's what rewrite(s) are for. :)
I like the characters. I can't help wondering what spin you can put on
the tale ... perhaps, since the action is a little slow, Excalibur might
take thing's into his/its/her/whatever's er... hands... and immediately
propel everyone into the adventure. Of course, there's the old saw
about an evil monster bursting into the computer room....
By all means, continue!
.---Anime/Manga Fanfiction Mailing List----.
| Administrators - email@example.com |
| Unsubscribing - firstname.lastname@example.org |
| Put 'unsubscribe' in the subject |
`---- http://ffml.anifics.com/faq.txt -----'