Hmm... I just happen to pause and blink, then three months dash on by without me
posting another chapter in this random saga.  Oops! ^^;;;

Those of you who remember Nuke 'Em 'Till They Glow!!, the odd fanfic sensation
of 1999 and 2002, this one's different.  It's an alternate storyline that I
wrote in an effort to just get the entire thing done in one huge gulp.  I named
it after the worst Tenchi series of all time so I wouldn't waste my writing
moments worrying about little things like quality and trying to meet others'
expectations. ^_^

Of course, some people have looked over the chapters and provided a bit of
feedback on things that needed to be fixed since its initial draft.  So, the
story's not too shabby now, or at least it won't be once the first editing pass
is complete.

-Larry F, for one, is still my main editor-guy.  He's been busy during the past
while, but he still managed to get this one looked over.  He's still keeping
the Florestica site up to date! (www.florestica.com)

-Josh Temple, who laughed, cried, complained, rejoiced, complimented, and
suffered through the entire draft and gave me some feedback on things he saw
could be fixed.  Some things in future chapters shall have to be tweaked still,
but I'm taking in consideration comments that he made on the draft.  Even got
some comments on earlier chapters on the Fukufics forum (www.fukufics.com).

Previous chapters of this story can be found at:
http://boliver.florestica.com/tint/index.htm

Fans of what I now call NETTG Classic (that one with novel-length chapters)
might like my webcomic, now getting rather infrequent updates due to various
art and script concerns:  http://nettg.com

The last two chapters of Terra in Tokyo were "The Plot Thickens," and "Then it
Jibbers a Bit."

And now....

Nuke 'Em 'Till They Glow!!
Terra in Tokyo

---Chapter 11:  Then it Falls Over, Screaming.

	Tuxedo Kamen fought like mad to keep the angry demon squirrels from rending the
flesh from his bones.  For a long series of seconds that felt like minutes, he
deflected countless numbers of missile-like rodents from all directions with
his spinning extendable cane.

	"Where are they all coming from!?" the man shouted in confusion.

	The cat on his shoulder opened her mouth to suggest a possible explanation, but
stopped and gasped when her eyes fell upon the source of the sciurid maelstrom. 
"It's a mystic solid holographic projection generator!"

	"A WHAT?!" exclaimed Tuxedo Kamen.

	Luna glanced at the shining shape that was the source of their dilemma, then
looked at him and clarified her statement in simpler terms, "It's an enchanted
stone ball that makes fake things seem real."

	"How do I stop it?"

	"If you damage it, the magic should fall right apart!"

	"Right."  The masked man took out a long-stemmed red rose and flung it at
supersonic speeds at the glowing rock sphere.  In a flash, the stem jammed
deeply into the polished surface.  A series of cracks extended from the point
of entry while sparkling smoke poured out of the device.

	Soon, the smoke faded, and the assorted furballs disappeared.

	"That's very strange," said Luna as she hopped off the man's shoulder and
padded over to examine the projector.  "I thought all of these had been
destroyed."

	"We made a few new ones," said a voice from the shadows.

	"Who's there?" asked Tuxedo Kamen as he himself retreated into a shady corner
of the street.

	General Nephrite of the Dark Kingdom stepped into the light, an almost regal
figure in his uniform and long brown hair.  His lightly scarred jaw hardly
showed any signs that it had been shattered just a few days before.  "You came
here very quickly," he noted.

	Tuxedo Kamen scowled.  "You're after the Rainbow Crystals, aren't you?"

	Nephrite nodded.  "We don't like losing, so we decided we ought to step things
up a bit.  So, you've come here to find the next one, have you?"

	"I'll stop you," insisted the masked man.  "I have my reasons to get them as
well."

	The general shook his head, smiling as if he were speaking to a child who
totally missed the point.  "You're too late."  He held up a green gem.

	Tuxedo Kamen clutched his cane and prepared to rush forward.

	A woman stepped out of the shadows beside Nephrite.  She had long dark hair, a
pink robe, and white angelic wings.  However, the sickly hue of her skin drove
home the point that she was a youma--a sort of demon monster of the Dark
Kingdom.

	"I present the newly revived Great Youma," said Nephrite proudly.  "Say hello,
Bina."

	The angelic youma nodded pleasantly, and held out her hand.  Dozens of
feathers--quill pens--appeared and began to sketch in the air.  Drawings of
knives became real projectiles speeding towards both Luna and Tuxedo Kamen. 
The man grabbed Luna and rolled out of the way of the sharp objects.

	"Oh no!" cried Luna.  "We have to get out of here!"

	"I'm not leaving without my crystal," Tuxedo Kamen replied through clenched
teeth.  He placed Luna in the bushes and motioned for her to stay put.  He spun
his cane quickly in the air to knock aside the newest volley of knives.

	The man took four roses in his fist and hurled them at Nephrite.  Before the
general could react, he took thorny stems in the wrist, shoulder, and in the
foot.  Nephrite staggered and dropped the crystal he held.

	Tuxedo Kamen used the building's large metal fire escape to block another
series of projectiles--these ones large one-ton boulders--and delivered a firm
kick to Bina's larynx.  The resulting crack probably created more noise than
damage, but the youma was still stunned from the impact.

	"Careful!" hollered Luna.  "She's a human being that's been turned into a
youma!"

	"Tell it to someone who cares," muttered Tuxedo Kamen as he snatched the green
Rainbow Crystal, cartwheeled around Nephrite's enraged energy blasts, grabbed
Luna, and sped away down the street.

	After about five minutes' sprint, they found what looked like a quiet, secluded
spot and took stock of their situation.

	"Is this the real thing?" Tuxedo Kamen inquired, holding the gem up so that
Luna could see it.

	The cat stared at it, blinked, sniffed it, then closed her eyes.  The crescent
mark on her forehead glowed momentarily.  "Yes," she replied.  "It's a Rainbow
Crystal."

	The man breathed a sigh of relief.  "Good."

	"But the Dark Kingdom still kidnapped that poor woman.  And that means they
have another one of their Great Youma to send against us!"

	"Shh," Tuxedo Kamen hushed, as he held a hand to his forehead in concentration.
 "The images in my head are showing me something."

	From the look in his eyes, what was once a mire of murky misconceptions seemed
to become a fountain of pure clarity.

	"Ah-ha!  I knew it!" the masked man proclaimed.  "I AM Tuxedo Kamen!"

	Luna stared at him.  "Well, yes.  I thought we had been over this."

	"No, no.  You don't understand," Tuxedo Kamen amended.  "I also know who I
really am.  Before, it's been just like a series of scattered dreams.  Now it's
all clear.  My memories are coming back to me, and having this crystal here is
helping me sort it out."  He held up the gem to demonstrate it again to Luna.

	Then a sparking energy blast struck his hand, knocking the crystal away.  A
feather quill drew a baseball catcher's mitt in the air, which grabbed the
shard and flew in a semicircle around the man and the cat, back to Nephrite and
the newest addition to the Negamafoozles.

	"Good work, Bina," Nephrite whispered.

	"GIVE THAT BACK!" hollered Tuxedo Kamen as he clutched in pain his moderately
burned hand.

	The Second General grinned and said, "I'd love to stay and chat about old
times, but I've got a delivery to make.  Here, play with Leo instead."

	"Leo?" whispered Luna.

	Nephrite held his hands together and an arena of stars appeared behind him.  A
series of lines connected a constellation, which was soon overlaid by the
glowing form of a lion.  Then he laughed, turned around with Bina in tow, and
vanished.

	Roaring, Leo leapt high into the air with claws slashing down towards Tuxedo
Kamen.

---

	It had taken some effort, but Sailor Mars and Sailor Mercury had managed to
track down one of the Rainbow Crystal carriers.  Ami's computer had led them to
a laboratory deep within Tokyo University.  Security was light; apparently, no
one in charge was very concerned with rumors they might have heard about the
Dark Kingdom's attacks.

	Seeming to drive home the casual atmosphere, the lab's heavy metal
keycard-access door was propped open with a chair.

	"It's so hot in here," a woman in a lab coat moaned, loosening her collar while
she examined the progress of the chemical experiment going on in front of her.

	A large blue dot flashed on the visor over Sailor Mercury's eyes.  "It's locked
on," Ami said.  "She has one of the crystals."

	Sailor Mars nodded and took out an inscribed paper ward--not that different
from the ones decorating the Hikawa Shrine.  "We need the crystal, but I don't
want any more people taken by the Dark Kingdom."

	"Can you remove it without it turning her into a youma?"

	"I hope so."

	The scientist looked up and noticed them.  Her eyes went wide and she started
towards them urgently.  "Err!  Excuse me, but you can't be in here right now." 
She glanced at their outfits.  "Especially not without goggles and lab coats. 
We have some VERY volatile experiments going on."

	Rei came forward and held up a hand.  "I know this may seem strange, but we
have to talk to you."

	"I mean, really," the crystal carrier continued to herself, "who do these
cheerleaders think they are, barging in like that?  Not hardly proper."

	Mars saw the woman's nametag.  "Look, Reika.  There's something very important
we have to do."

	Reika froze.  "Who are you?  How do you know my name?  Did Doctor Germahn send
you?  I warn you--I know chemistry, entomology, and anthropology.  Why are you
working for him, anyway?  Shrink Soda, Femme Cola, and Furry Juice?  He's mad,
I say.  Mad!"

	"He's not the only one," sighed Mercury, who stepped forward and spoke up. 
"Doctor... Reika...?"

	"I'm only a doctoral student, but I'm due to defend my thesis next Thursday. 
Now, if you'll--"

	"Yes, well," continued Ami, who took a deep breath, "your body currently houses
a crystal fragment of one of the most important artifacts in the world.  The
world, you see, is in danger from beings called youma, from another dimension. 
We need to extract it from you so we can stop them and save the world.  Will you
let us?"

	Reika folded her arms and stared at them.  "Pull the other one."

	"It's true," Mars insisted.

	The woman scientist chewed her lip for a moment, apparently deciding whether or
not to believe them.  Finally, she shrugged.  "Hmm.  You must be telling the
truth, because the cheerleaders' honor code dictates that you must not lie, on
penalty of humiliation by ritualistic hazing.  I've attended one or two
ceremonies, and I can tell you it's not pretty.  Unless you're one of those
creepy Emo Goth bondage types.  Then you might actually enjoy it."  She cleared
her throat.  "Very well.  What shall I do?"

	"Just stand still," Rei said, lifting the ward, "and I'll do the rest."

	However, before Rei could apply her Mystic Shinto Voodoo Magic to Reika, a beam
of dark energy hit the woman from behind, ripped out a blue gem, and engulfed
her in a swirl of black smoke.

	"NO!" cried both Rei and Ami in unison.

	Kunzite came out of the shadows in the corner of the darkened laboratory and
pocketed the blue Rainbow Crystal.  "You're too slow, Sailor SUSHI."  He gazed
toward the green-skinned being that had replaced Reika.  "Rikoukeidaa!  We're
going back to the Dark Kingdom to meet Queen Beryl.  But first, what do you say
we dispose of these annoying brats?"

	"With pleasure, General!" Rikoukeidaa replied gleefully, and took out a pair of
large beakers full of bubbling chemicals.  "Tell me, girls, do you know what
happens when you mix an acid with a base?"

	"SHABON SPRAY!"
	"FIRE SOUL!"

	"Wrong on both accounts," the youma said, quite full of herself and oblivious
of the combined incoming strikes.

	Kunzite stepped forward and blocked Mars' and Mercury's attacks.  "No, on
second thought, let's just go back to see Beryl.  These two look like they want
to get tricky tonight."

	Sailor Mars had leapt towards them in a flying kick, glowing wards in both
hands, but by the time she reached their position, they had disappeared into a
fast-dissolving black vortex.  Instead, she slammed knees-first into a
chemical-laden table, sending flasks and beakers high into the air.

	Drops sizzled on the floor as they rained down and both girls cursed loudly as
the rest of the noxious compounds flew towards them.

---

	The Star Light Knight impatiently tapped his foot while Usagi waved the
Crescent Moon Stick in hopes that it would show her the way towards a Rainbow
Crystal.

	"How DOES this thing work, anyway?" Sailor Moon wondered aloud.

	"Don't you know?"  S.L.K. grabbed the device.  "Here, let me show you."  He
shook it around, banged it on his armor, and stuck it out in front of him. 
"All right, Stick!  Time for you to get workin' and earn your keep!  Which way
to the crystal, huh?"

	Nothing happened, except that the man started to look pretty silly holding up
what appeared to be a crescent-shaped plastic wand.  After a minute, he gave up
and handed the wand back to Usagi.

	"Hmm, that didn't work," commented Usagi.

	"Yeah, this stinks," S.L.K. said.  "What we need here is, like, some serious
spiritual guidance."  He looked at the girl.  "Where would you go for spiritual
guidance if you needed some?"

	Sailor Moon thought about that.  "I don't know.  Maybe up on the top of Mount
Fuji to meditate where it's quiet?"

	S.L.K. nodded.  "Yeah, that's what I was gonna say too."

	A gem on the stick started blinking when a black-clad Christian priest walked
by and gave them a pleasant wave.

	Sailor Moon held up the wand and pointed it toward the priest.  The device
glowed brighter the more directly she aimed it.  "Starlight!  I think we found
it!"

	The Star Light Knight slapped his face, shook his head, and moaned, "Oh, give
me a break!  Does HE look like Mount Fuji to you?"  He held up his palm. 
"Don't answer that.  Now c'mon, let's go!"  He took the girl by the wrist and
started to pull her away while she puzzled over his logic.

	A few seconds later, the armored man stopped and sniffed the air.  "Hang on. 
Do you smell something?"

	Sailor Moon also sniffed around.  "You're wearing cologne that smells like
thirty-weight motor oil?"

	"No!" S.L.K. shot back, then paused and amended, "Well yes.  But that's not
what I was talking about."

	"What did you smell?"

	"I smelled," S.L.K. replied, deep in thought, before going wild-eyed and
whipping out a sawed-off shotgun, "CHERRY BLOSSOMS!  GRRRAAAAHHHRRR!!!"

	The man whipped around and fired four shots in the priest's general direction. 
The holy man yelled out in fright and dove for cover while a swirl of cherry
petals appeared behind where he had stood.

	When Zoicite finally materialized, he staggered backward, his chest riddled
with little holes.  Green ichor poured out and pooled beneath the fallen body.

	"Yeah, that's RIGHT!" S.L.K. yelled, stalking towards his victim.  "That's
what'chew get!  Wait till I reload!  I'm gonna lay all your buddies out right
beside you!  Who's the man?!  WHO'S THE MAN?!"

	"Umm, Starlight?" Sailor Moon whispered urgently when she saw something waver
behind the man.

	In a bamph of smoke, Zoicite's body disappeared and was replaced with a bucket
of green slime.

	S.L.K. frowned, but a sudden jarring sensation notified him of something amiss.
 Looking down, he saw the giant rock shard protruding from his now-broken
breastplate.  The stone hissed and vanished, leaving a huge gaping hole.

	Sailor Moon gasped and covered her mouth in shock.

	"Eh, don't worry, kid!" S.L.K. called back to her.  "I'm a professional!  I do
this all the time!"

	Usagi stared at him for a moment and apparently decided that since the man
wasn't bleeding and didn't seem to be in any pain, he was probably okay,
though, for the life of her, she couldn't figure out how.  She glanced towards
Zoicite.  "Starlight!" she cried.  "He's taking the crystal!"

	"What?!"  S.L.K. turned around to see Zoicite with a black gem pointed at the
priest, who cowered on the ground.  A pillar of red and black engulfed the
minister, and he turned into a taller light-greenish-skinned version of
himself, wearing athletic shorts and boxing gloves.  "Hey!"

	"Good to have you back, Bokushi."  An orange gem flew from the former priest's
chest into Zoicite's grasp.  The general grinned cruelly at S.L.K. and Sailor
Moon.  "Oh no," he said, "it looks like your boyfriend's dead now, Sailor Moon,
doesn't it?"

	"Hey, Zoi," S.L.K. choked out, "I love what'cha did with your face.  Here, let
me fix up the rest of you!"  He whipped out a gauss rifle and opened fire. 
Despite the suddenness of the assault, Zoicite was able to avoid getting hit,
save for a slight graze on his hand, which was painful enough to force him to
drop the Rainbow Crystal.  Then the knight pulled out a grenade, ripped the pin
out, and hurled towards the boxer youma, who merely looked down as it bounced
off of him.

	The resulting explosion flung Bokushi away into the bushes.

	"Yeah, take that, you boxing-gloves-wearing green-skinned freak!" S.L.K.
shouted after the youma, taking aim again with his gun.

	"But Starlight," Usagi coughed, "he's really just an innocent human being."

	The knight frowned.  "Oh yeah, I forgot about that.  Need to take out the
marginally-less-than-lethal stuff."  He put away the rifle, reached into his
pocket, and pulled out the mother of all Tasers.  Four feet long and covered
with bizarre wiring, it didn't look like something he could have easily
concealed on his person.  "SAY HELLO TO MY LITTLE FRIEND!!!"

	He pulled the trigger and the Taser started to hum.  In two seconds, a
one-meter-diameter ball of condensed lightning formed at the device's tip.  The
recoil from when it fired scooted S.L.K. back half a meter on his feet.  When
the blast impacted, the resulting shockwave broke all the windows within a
half-mile radius and sent an acrid ozone-smelling wind blowing from the scene
at thirty miles per hour.  A nearby building collapsed in a shower of debris.

	"WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" S.L.K. shouted in triumph.

	When the dust cleared, Zoicite stood firm in front of Bokushi, seemingly amused
by the attack.

	"What the freak is this?!" the knight shouted angrily.  "I shot you fair and
square!  You're supposed to be knocked silly and crispy from that!"

	Zoicite ignored him, but rather stared at the gaping hole in his chest. 
"You're a machine, are you?"

	"You got a problem with that?!"

	"No, not really.  I was afraid you were actually going to be dangerous.  Robots
can't hurt me.  In fact, no non-magical weapons can affect the barriers of a
Dark Kingdom general."

	"Cheater," S.L.K. spat, and took out a .44 Magnum as well as a clip with mystic
runes and symbols drawn on it.  Locking and loading, he muttered, "Guess we'll
have to do this the old-fashioned way."

	"I'm sorry but I don't have time to mess with you, wires-for-brains," Zoicite
said derisively as he picked up the fallen Rainbow Crystal.  "The Queen is so
anxious to meet our old friend here."  He grabbed Bokushi by the shoulder and
prepared to teleport away.

	"Moon Tiara Action!"

	The glowing disc of Sailor Moon's charged tiara bit deeply into the general's
arm, once again forcing him to drop the crystal, and he had already teleported
back to the Dark Kingdom in a shower of cherry blossoms before he could do
anything about it.

	Sailor Moon hurried over and picked up the Orange Rainbow Crystal.  "All
right!"  She jumped for joy.  "We got one of the crystals!"

	"Wa-hoo!" S.L.K. cheered enthusiastically, and held out his hand.  "Great job,
kid.  Can I see it?"

	Usagi clasped the gem close, looking rather uncertain.  "Umm...."

	S.L.K. shrugged.  "Fine, I don't care."

	"Aw, I didn't mean it," Sailor Moon said hurriedly, and handed over the Rainbow
Crystal.  "You know you've still got a big hole in your chest, right?"

	The man nodded while he examined the crystal very closely.  "Yeah, I'll go find
a machine shop somewhere and get it fixed up when we're all done here tonight." 
As if to emphasize his words, some of the wires hanging down sparked a little. 
"Happens all the time."  He sighed when a tag labeled "HECHO EN MEXICO" fell
onto the ground.  "Cheap foreign mechanical body replacements...."

	"So, Starlight," Usagi said in a forced cheerful tone, "you're really a robot?"

	"Kind of, but not really.  I'm just using something I had custom made so I
don't use up all my power.  I'm a psychically projected being made of pure
energy."

	"Pure energy?"

	"Well, maybe only ninety percent pure energy."  S.L.K. turned his face upward
in thought.  "Hey, if you want to get WAY specific, I'm really the psychic
projection of a reincarnated destroyer of worlds that had to turn itself into
royalty to survive.  Now how messed up is that?"

	Sailor Moon's eyes glazed momentarily while she sorted through some of the
words.  "You're royalty?"

	"Kind of."

	"Are you a prince?"

	"That's a stretch, but close enough."

	"A prince," Usagi whispered to herself in awe.  "Neat!"  Then she looked
nervous.  "Umm... can I ask you, ah, what's your real name?"

	"Oh, that's easy," S.L.K. said offhandedly.  "My real name is... the
Hydrogen-Fueled Fusion-Powered Razzle-Dazzle Jazzle-Matazzle Atomic Star Light
Knight!"  His voice seemed to echo dramatically when he said his name.  "I
slice, I dice, I blast things into smithereens... and I can even make youma
french fries in point oh-two seconds!  YEAH, BABY!!!"

	"Huh?!"

	At the girl's confusion, he amended, "But there are some who might call me...
'Tom, for short?"

	"'Tom?  That's... that's a handsome name."  Usagi's eyes went all dreamy.  "I
like it, it's foreign."

	"Yeah," 'Tom replied.  "Anyway, here's your crystal back--"

	Then at that moment, a red energy blade cut through the air in front of the
Star Light Knight, slicing cleanly through his wrist.  The hand that held the
Rainbow Crystal spiraled in the air for a moment before it was snatched up in a
flash by Kunzite, who stopped a short distance away.

	Sailor Moon gasped and covered her mouth.  "You!"

	"Ha-hah," said Kunzite cleanly, "so you see, there is nothing you have that we
cannot take away!"  He pulled the crystal from the grasp of the mechanical
fingers and was gone before the metallic mess hit the ground.

	"Oh no!" Usagi whined.  "Now they've got another crystal!"

	"Egads," S.L.K. whispered in shock.  "Has the world gone mad?  Have those
generals finally learned proper TACTICS?!  THE FIENDS!"  He looked at the
blonde teen.  "Look, you go back to your friends.  I need to head off."

	"But wait!  Where are you going, 'Tom?"

	S.L.K. pointed at his chest and waved with his still-glowing stump.  "Isn't it
obvious?  The Negamapansies are gearing up for a big fight, so I'm gonna have
to go make some repairs and upgrades before going up against them again."

	That seemed to make perfect sense to Usagi.  "Oh, right!  But wait a second." 
She rushed over and picked up the damaged bit of electronics on the ground,
then went back and handed it to the android.  "Here."

	"What's that?"

	"It's your hand."

	The knight looked down at the black-gloved metal bit, then back at Usagi before
finally shrugging.  He closed the girl's hand over the device, patted it, and
said, "Eh, keep it."

	"You don't need it?"

	"Nah, I'll make a better one."  He gave her a quick, sloppy salute with his
remaining hand.  "ROCK AND ROLL!  Anyway, see you later, and be careful."

	"R-right," Sailor Moon stammered, and then the man was gone.

---

	Back at the Hikawa Shrine, it appeared that most of the group had made it back.
 Mercury and Mars were gingerly treating marginally serious chemical burns while
Tuxedo Kamen wrapped up his arms in thick bandages.  He had claw marks over a
lot of his body.

	Luna seemed particularly sorry.  "I'm sorry, Tuxedo Kamen.  If only we'd gotten
there sooner, we could have kept the crystal from them."

	"It's okay," sighed the masked man.  "At least now, I've got my memories back. 
Most of them, I think."

	Usagi walked in and took a seat.  "So," she said with feigned cheerfulness,
"did anyone manage to get a crystal?"

	"No," said Tuxedo Kamen.  "They came too fast."

	"We couldn't hardly do anything," muttered Mars.  "No crystal here, either. 
How about you, Sailor Moon?"

	Usagi fidgeted.  "Ah... Heh... Well... That is... Um... No."

	Everyone breathed a sad sigh of defeat.

	"Where's the Star Light Knight?" asked Luna.  "Did he run off?"

	"Um, the thing is, we were fighting really, really good for a while," Sailor
Moon said, "but then Zoicite teamed up with Kunzite, and we just couldn't win. 
Starlight got... hurt, and he went off to 'fix' himself up."

	"There's something really wrong about that guy," said Mars.

	"I agree," added Mercury.  "It's like he isn't human."

	"He's a robot," replied Usagi with resignation.  "Here, he gave me this."  With
a loud thunk, she dropped the heavy severed metal hand on the table.  Everyone
stared at it for a while with their mouths hanging open.

	"A robot?"  Luna boggled at the concept.  "What in the world?!"

	Usagi waved as if she wanted to dispel any misconceptions.  "But a good robot! 
A robot that helps us win!"

	"He really gave you a hand there back there," punned Rei.  "Didn't he, Usagi?"

	Usagi laughed nervously.  "Yeah, I guess."

	Mercury got her computer out and started scanning the mechanical limb fragment.
 "But, if he's a robot, I don't see how this could work for him.  There aren't
any motors or things that could be used for locomotion."

	"The thing is," Usagi said, "he said he was... well, I don't remember exactly
what he said.  He might be a prince or something, though.  Maybe."

	"Prince of the Tin Men, maybe," Rei jibed.

	"So, has anyone heard from Terra yet?" Sailor Moon asked.

	Mercury shook her head.  "No, nobody.  But at last count, this means that the
Dark Kingdom has six out of seven of the crystals, as well as the Great Youma."

	Usagi sighed.  "I just hope Chibimoon and Sailor Jupiter have better luck than
we did."

	Wincing from his battle-inflicted wounds, Tuxedo Kamen whispered, "I hope she's
all right."

	Luna nodded her agreement.  Looking out the window at the stars, she added,
"Right now, they're our last hope."

---

	At the local mall, Sailors Jupiter and Chibimoon were trying on shoes.  As soon
as the duo had left the shrine, Makoto began dutifully following Terra around,
as per Luna's instructions.  Unfortunately, as it turned out, Terra didn't seem
to have any intention of hunting down youma or Rainbow Crystals.  The Irish girl
made a beeline straight for the nearest shopping center, and couldn't be easily
distracted from her unknown goal for a very long time.

	"I don't really like Rei's sneakers," Terra said while lacing up a new pair of
shoes, "and they don't go with my skirt.  Maybe I don't like my fuku colors,
but if I'm gonna have them anyway, I might as well get something that matches."

	"Yeah, I guess so," commented Makoto.

	Chibimoon chewed her lip for a moment, as if forcing herself to change her mind
about something.  "No, that's wrong.  Actually, I LOVE my fuku colors.  They're
very cute and adorable, and I LIKE looking cute and adorable.  I LIKE jewelry,
I LIKE shopping, and I LIKE dressing up in cute outfits, too."  She pounded on
her head a little, then looked down at her feet.  "But I DON'T like these
shoes, so I'm not going to buy them."  She removed the current set of footwear
and put Rei's sneakers back on.

	Jupiter looked at her friend quizzically.  "Chibimoon, don't you think we're
taking this kind of, y'know, lightly?  This IS the end of the world we're
talking about here."

	"Sailor Jupiter, I'm surprised at you," Terra replied sternly with her voice
nearly cracking.  "How can you even THINK about talking about the end of the
world when I just missed out on the biggest chance ever to spend some quality
time with my boyfriend?"  She paused in thought.  "Okay, I admit, my priorities
may seem a bit screwed-up right now, but still--"

	"No, no," Makoto replied with a peaceful hand gesture.  "I understand.  Let's
go shop some more."

	Terra nodded.  "Some other place now.  There's nothing I want here anyway."

---

	What's gotten into me? Terra asked herself as she walked through the mall
alongside Sailor Jupiter.  Real heroines aren't supposed to act like this.

	But, she didn't really feel like being a heroine right now.  All she wanted to
do was go home, crawl into bed, and forget the last few months ever happened. 
She might feel differently in the morning, she imagined, but as for right now,
she'd had it with a lot of what was going on, especially with Arby, the Rainbow
Crystals, and the end of the world.  Plus, her self-confidence was at an
all-time low.

	A pair of young boys jumped up from a bench, gasped, and pointed at her and
Makoto.  "It's the Sailor Soldier girls!" they squealed.

	Chibimoon forced herself to smile.  It seemed that there were people around who
could appreciate her after all.  What's a heroine's job without a bit of praise
now and again?  It'd do her a lot of good, she thought, to bask in some praise
for a few minutes.  Then maybe she could go look for whatever it was she was
supposed to look for.

	"Sailor Jupiter," Chibimoon said in a relaxed, professional tone, "we're going
over there to talk to those two kids."

	"We are?" replied Jupiter in surprise.  "Is one of them a crystal carrier?"

	"Let's find out."

	Adopting a smooth military-like pace, Terra turned on her heel and marched
toward the boys.  As she came close, she gave them a smart salute and said,
"Good evening.  I understand you two know about the Sailor Soldiers?"

	The younger of the two boys nodded emphatically.  "Uh-huh!  We hear about you
all the time, how you go out and whack evil stuff, save the world, and all that
good stuff."  He blinked at Terra and rubbed his eyes.  "Sailor Chibimoon?!"

	Terra smiled keenly.  "Yes, that's me, young man."  She added a mature edge to
her voice and tried to adopt a little of her native accent when she spoke to
add a more fantasy-like flair to the conversation.  "You've heard of me?"

	"Hoo-yeah, I have!  You're the best!  I'm one of your biggest fans!  I'm Timmy.
 Can I have your autograph?"  The boy held up a white-paged book.

	Terra signed "Sailor Chibimoon" in neat calligraphy.

	"Thanks!" Timmy said.

	"Your name is YOSHI, 'niichan," whispered the older boy impatiently.

	"Who's this?" Terra asked, pointing toward the older one of the two.  "A
friend?"

	"Nah, that's just my brother, Steve."

	"My name is Yamato," corrected Steve.  "Excuse Yoshi.  He's a little obsessed
with American culture."

	"I see," commented Terra.  "So, what do you think of me, Steve?"

	"He says you SUCK!" replied Timmy.

	Chibimoon's expression fell and she started to glare at the older boy, who
returned her gaze with equal intensity.  "Oh he does, does he?"

	"Yeah, that's right," said Steve.  "But I think Sailor Jupiter ROCKS!"

	"She DOES rock," agreed Timmy.

	Jupiter folded her arms smugly.  "Yeah, that's right."

	"And aren't there five of you?" asked Steve.

	"Well yeah," Terra replied.  "But the rest are probably off saving the world,
thwarting villains, risking their lives and stuff, so they couldn't be here."

	"And what are you doing here in the mall, Chibimoon?" inquired Steve.  "What
dire threat have you come to ward off?"

	"Me?" replied Terra, who shrugged.  "Just came to shop, blow off steam, and
maybe get some new shoes--"

	"Whoa, whoa, whoa," interrupted Timmy with frantic hand gestures.  "You mean to
say that while all your friends are risking their lives in defense of the
planet, you're here moping around and shopping for clothes?"

	"Well, yeah," said Terra weakly.

	Timmy looked at his brother.  "You were right.  She DOES suck."

	"Hey, I toldja," replied Steve, and the two walked off, pausing only to bow and
wave to Jupiter as they departed.

	Terra's mind found itself in a loop considering the words she had just heard. 
All that night, she could have been bravely scouring the city for a crystal
that she could have kept from falling into the hands of the Negamafoozles. 
Instead, she spent the evening moping and feeling sorry for herself that she
didn't get to spend the time with Tuxedo Kamen.  That wasn't what real heroines
did.  That's what sniveling little cowards did.  Tears welled up in her eyes. 
"It's so true!  I do suck!"

	"Hey, Red, don't take it so hard," Jupiter comforted the girl.  "After all, you
can't ALWAYS be going around half-killing yourself to save the day."

	But it was too late.  The girl had already run off, sobbing like a particularly
loud baby.  "WA-HAAAAAAH!"

	"Chibimoon!" Makoto called after her and began pursuit.  "Wait up!  Sheesh,
what's gotten into you?!"

	From the darkness between the cloth folds in the white underthings section of a
nearby department store, a pair of red eyes glowed.  "Yesssss, very good!  Go
on, lead me right to him, you sssssimple-minded foolsssss!"

---End of Chapter 11

And now it's time for... MIND YOUR MANNERS!!! with Sailor Nuke.

(Scene of the Star Light Knight powering up and firing the mother of all Tasers)

Sailor Nuke:  Today we learned that whenever you find out that lives are in
danger, it just means you need to use a bigger gun.

Sailor Kawaii(walks on stage, reading a book, and looks up):  Uh, what are you
talking about?

(Mars and Mercury combine attacks to combat Kunzite)

Sailor Nuke:  Little wussie pansy attacks like bubbles and fireballs just don't
cut it anymore.

Sailor Kawaii(protesting loudly):  Bubbles and little fireballs are CUTE!

(Sailor Moon slams Zoicite with her tiara and takes the crystal back)

Sailor Nuke:  Those tiny attacks may LOOK strategic, but they're really just a
waste of time.

Sailor Kawaii:  Are not!  Take that back!!!

(A grenade knocks the boxer-youma back into the bushes)

Sailor Nuke(ignores Kawaii):  So remember: don't bring a knife to a bazooka
fight.  Sailor Nuke sez.  BWAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAAA!!!

(Terra tries some new shoes on)

Sailor Kawaii(composes herself):  On the other hand, whatever gun you use, you
should always try to find a nice, cute outfit to wear, so you can confuse your
enemies until it's too late for them to react.

(Bruce eyes the girls from the shadows)

Sailor Kawaii:  Sailor Kawaii says!  Tee-hee!

--
Benjamin A Oliver
boliver@email.arizona.edu

Master of Science in Management Information Systems
Eller College of Management
University of Arizona

Writings: Fan Fiction
http://boliver.florestica.com/

Webcomic: Nuke 'Em 'Till They Glow!! The Early Years
http://nettg.com


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