**********************************************************************
[Kannazuki no Miko] Blinded
Blinded - Part I
A Kannazuki no Miko Fanfic
By Jen-chan
jen-chan@shaw.ca
July 17 - August 4, 2006
DISCLAIMER: This fanfic was written with knowledge of Kannazuki no
Miko derived from the entire twelve episode fansubbed series. The
characters from Kannazuki no Miko that appear in this fanfic do not
belong to the author and are being used without permission from their
owners, who include Kaishaku and TNK.
SPOILER WARNING: Spoilers for the entire series exist in this fanfic.
Do not read on if you don't want to know how the story ends.
LIME WARNING: This fanfic contains strong but non-explicit sexual
themes and is intended for an older teen audience. Reader discretion is
advised.
CONTINUITY NOTE: This fanfic takes place in the same universe as a
previous KnM fic of mine, Finally Healing. No knowledge of that fic is
required to understand this one, save for the following plot points:
1) This fic takes place when Chikane and Himeko are in their early
twenties, fresh out of college. Chikane has been reborn as Miyahime
Chikane. Still coming from a well privileged family, she has a budding
career as a pianist. Neither she, nor Himeko (nor anyone else for that
matter) retain memories of their previous written-over lives, save for
fragmented dreams.
2) Otoha-san was in the employment of the Himemiya family until about
the same time that Chikane returned to Japan from studying abroad. She
is now employed as Chikane's maid and loving her job.
3) Souma and Makoto have fallen in love and are about to be married.
SYNOPSIS: An accident robs Chikane of her vision temporarily. The
disability causes her to push those closest to her away. But they will
not be so easily deterred...
Comments and Criticisms are greatly appreciated!
Author's Notes and Omake follow this fanfic.
**********************************************************************
Miyahime Chikane's screaming - shrilly, painfully - was a sound that
Kurusugawa Himeko was never going to be able to forget. Nor would the
sight of the usually tall, graceful woman, bent over in shock and
searing agony, clutching at her flimsy plastic goggles as toxic
chemicals meant for film development dripped through her bangs into her
eyes, be a sight that would ever leave Himeko's memory again.
For the millionth time in the last two hours, as she sat shivering and
hunched over on the cold, impersonal hospital bench, Himeko wondered
how a simple outing to see her new place of employment could have ended
so disastrously. Had it been a prank - a cruel trick played out of
jealousy and resentment? Even amateur students knew that chemicals were
to be kept in the bottom drawers, precisely to prevent what had
occurred from ever happening. And, of course, all bottles were to be
properly and tightly sealed at all times - that step was even listed on
the safety checklist, posted on the darkroom door!
Oh why - why why why why why?! - had that bottle of stop bath teetered
twice and then fallen directly on top of Chikane's head, when Himeko
had idly suggested to her lover to look in an overhead cabinet for
paper towels?
Himeko heard Otoha Keiko sniff and out of the corner of her eyes,
noticed the maid raise a white handkerchief to her face once more,
silently weeping. Seeing the older woman's shoulders shaking so made
the blonde photographer almost wish that Otoha would scream at her, or
slap her again, as she had when she'd first gotten to the hospital. The
wordless accusations were far less bearable...
"Kurusugawa Himeko?"
Himeko jerked her head up and saw a white coated doctor gazing tiredly
down at her.
Otoha leapt to her feet beside Himeko and grabbed the doctor's arm
before Himeko even had a chance to stand up. "Doctor! How is Ojou-sama?
How is she??"
The doctor gave the woman a slightly perturbed once over as if to ask
who she was before sighing. "We were lucky that the safety glasses kept
the entire bottle from emptying into her eyes, but as it is, there's
still extensive damage. We managed to flush all of it out, and it's
looking good for a recovery but you also need to understand that
permanent blindness may also be a possibility..."
Otoha's face grew even more ashen. The doctor gave a yelp when she
tightened her grip. "How can you say that?!" She cried manically, "how
can you even say recovery and permanent blindness in the same
sentence?! It doesn't make sense! You-"
Himeko didn't listen to the rest of Otoha's harsh words at the doctor
as she quietly got to her feet and walked quickly passed him, into the
room he had just exited.
Chikane sat in an ugly bed in the middle of the sterile room, her face
turned away from the door. Himeko could see a piece of white gauze
wrapped several times around her lover's head. Silently, she padded
across the room. With a shaking hand, she pulled one of the chairs
resting against the wall towards the bed, and sat down on it.
The scrapping of the chair legs against the floor finally prompted
Chikane to start in surprise, sitting up straight and hesitantly
turning to face the noise.
"Himeko?" Chikane's voice sounded quiet and unsure - uncharacteristic
tones that caused Himeko's heart to wrench tightly. She opened her
mouth, but as she noticed how Chikane was looking just to the left of
where she was sitting, Himeko found that she wasn't able to answer her
beloved's trepid call. Instead, as tears came unbidden to Himeko's
eyes, she could only reach out, and timidly touch Chikane's hands,
resting atop the thin sheets that covered the resting woman.
Immediately, Chikane grasped Himeko's hands back, tightly, more than
desperately.
The blue-black haired woman smiled gratefully and leaned back against
the pillows that were supporting her. "It _is_ you, Himeko."
Words still refusing to come to her, Himeko could only nod, even though
she knew the other woman couldn't see the affirmation.
Silence of a not entirely comfortable nature continued to permeate
through the room, and though Himeko herself couldn't break it, she
wished that Chikane wouldn't feel the need to break it for her.
Listening to her lover speak so softly, and watching her try so
valiantly to make everything seem all right, only made Himeko feel that
much more despair.
"I'll be fine. I need to keep them bandaged and away from light for the
next three weeks, and then the chances of a good recovery will be more
than eighty percent." Chikane's voice grew ever softer. "It probably
won't be a full recovery, but the doctors are confident that most-"
"I'm sorry."
Himeko finally found her voice as those tears in her eyes finally spilt
over. They caused her hard found words to break and crack.
"Himeko..."
"I'm sorry! I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry!" And now that she found
her words, she couldn't seem to stop them. "I'm sorry! I shouldn't
have... I shouldn't have... oh, gods, Chikane-chan, I'm so sorry...!
This is all my... this is all my... fault..."
Himeko felt Chikane reach out for her, and eventually touch fingers
against her face. They wiped away the tears that streamed down her
cheeks, and then those fingers reached behind her head to pull her into
a delicate embrace against Chikane's chest.
"Shh..." Chikane soothed. Himeko felt the warmth of her beloved's cheek
atop her head.
"It wasn't your fault. It wasn't anyone's fault. Perhaps... perhaps
this is just karma..."
Himeko shook her head furiously. "No! No, Chikane-chan, if karma were
working properly, then this would never have happened! For
everything... for everything you've done... you deserve nothing but the
best. Nothing but happily ever after..."
The blonde photographer felt slight rumbles of mirth in Chikane's
chest. "But Himeko, I already have my happily ever after. I have you,
don't I?" Here, once again, Chikane's voice grew pensive in that way
that made Himeko's heart ache. "You... you'll stay with me through
this, won't you?"
Himeko's eyes widened before she squeezed them tightly shut again.
She wrapped her arms firmly around Chikane's body. "H-how could you
even question that?! Of course I will!"
She felt more purr-like chuckles rumble through Chikane's chest. "Then
everything will be just fine."
The confidence and security in her lover's voice tugged at the corner
of Himeko's lips and she closed her eyes again. She hoped Chikane-chan
was right. Dearly so.
***
In truth, Miyahime Chikane was not as certain as she had let her
beloved to believe. Whilst she had listened calmly to the doctors speak
about her chances, and had managed to relay the information
confidently, almost nonchalantly, back to Himeko and Otoha-san when the
maid had come into the room, she felt an acute sense of panic when the
nurse shooed her most loved ones out of the room an untraceable length
of time later, stating that visiting time was over many, many hours
ago, and that the best thing they could do for Chikane was to let her
rest.
Unfortunately, the 'rest' that the doctors claimed was so necessary to
her recovery, was anything but restful. A myriad of disturbing images
taunted and cackled cruelly at her. The most chilling dream was that of
a malevolently spiraling maw of dark despair that kept engulfing her
over and over whilst a deep booming voice proclaimed she would forever
wander in darkness, a creature of the moon, separated from the sun,
never to see daybreak again.
The worst part was that the voice was proved correct, when Chikane awoke
to the sensation of someone shaking her arm, telling her to wake up,
since it was already morning, and she couldn't make out anything at all
save for an unending expanse of inky, lonely, blackness.
She clung desperately to whomever - whatever - it was at her arm,
gasping plainly and feeling dizzy. "It's dark!!" She cried loudly, her
own voice shrill in her ears. "I can't see! Oh god, I can't- I
can't...!"
"It's alright. It's alright, Miyahime-san. I'm right here. You're not
alone."
Chikane continued to gasp. Gradually, mercifully, her memory came back
to her, pushing the roiling horror in her stomach down. It still took
several minutes - was it just a few minutes? Gods it was so hard to
tell - more for her manically thumping heart to stop trying to leap out
of her chest.
There had been an accident. She was in the hospital. Her eyes were
bandaged and would remain that way for the next three weeks and six
days.
Twenty-seven loooong and agonizing days...
Chikane tried to swallow, but her throat was parched and she ended up
coughing. "T-thank you, nurse." She finally managed to place the voice
that had awaken her. "I'm sorry. I... I forgot where I was."
"That's alright, it's perfectly understandable. You're doing very
well." The voice was kind, but rather impersonal. The nurse must have
said this a lot. "It's just a little bit past eight in the morning
right now, and I've got some cream for your eyes. After we get you
cleaned up a bit, would you like some breakfast?"
"Please, no." Chikane shook her head weakly. "I don't want food at
all."
"Hmm... well, alright, but you're going to have to eat eventually,
okay?"
Chikane nodded weakly. The nurse undid the bandages around her head,
and took off the patches and coverings over Chikane's eyes, telling her
to take care not to open them. Even though Chikane followed the nurse's
advice, still she felt an almost searing and unbearable brightness
through her eyelids. The nurse cleaned around her injury, and redressed
her wounds.
"Alright, that should do it. I need to go make my rounds now, but is
there anything else I can get for you? Headphones?"
Chikane felt a surge of fear run through her mind, but she refused to
let it show. "Headphones would... be nice. Excuse me, Nurse, but how
long must I stay here?"
"Hmm, I suspect they'll want to keep you here for observation for a
couple more days, but I'll check for you, alright?"
"Yes, thank you..."
In the end, Chikane raised enough of a dignified fuss to convince the
doctors to let her go home the next morning. She had never felt more
relieved to return home than that day. A very tired sort of relief
washed over her when she heard Otoha-san open the front door with a
click.
"Welcome home, Chikane-chan!"
Hearing Himeko's unexpected voice caused much of the wariness in
Chikane's limbs to dissipate. Her heart leapt happily into her throat.
"Himeko? Is that you?" She reached out blindly, panicking when she
couldn't find Himeko right away. But soon, she felt her beloved gently
grab her elbow. At the same time, Otoha-san reluctantly released her
other one, and she could hear her maid step quietly back.
"Yes it is! I'm sorry I couldn't come with Otoha-san to pick you up
from the hospital." Himeko's voice were sorrowful, and Chikane wanted
very much to take that sorrow and fling it into the sun.
"It's alright," Chikane replied. She paused. "Shouldn't you be at work
now?"
"The company is letting me take a leave of absence," Himeko explained
quietly.
Chikane could almost hear what Himeko had left unspoken.
"Chikane-chan, I... is it alright if I stayed with you? Until you got
better?"
Chikane felt a warm smile spread on her face. Really, why did Himeko
even feel the need to ask! "Of course, Himeko. I would most appreciate
it."
Though it wasn't exactly normal for a junior staff member to be able to
take so much time off, unpaid or otherwise, Himeko's superiors were
still trembling with fear at the prospect of a lawsuit. She moved into
the guest bedroom in name, though in practice, she shared Chikane's
bed every night.
Chikane spent her days eternally grateful for her lover's patient
presence at her side, helping her to re-familiarize herself to her
home. She felt an acute sense of helpless frustration when it took her
the better part of two days for her to find her way through all the
rooms in her home without help - not that Himeko or Otoha-san would let
her be by herself for too long.
Night quickly became Chikane's favorite time. The darkness of night
allowed her to forget that everything in her world was now dark, and as
she laid together with Himeko, bodies lightly touching and voices low
in quiet conversation, Chikane could almost feel like everything was
alright again.
***
The incessantly upbeat and cheerful tone from Himeko's cell phone woke
both she and Chikane up the next morning. Normally slow to rise, Himeko
gave a murmur of protest when her lover rolled away from her, robbing
her of that blissful, secure warmth only Chikane's arms could give.
Cracking her eyes open just a smidge, it took a few moments for Himeko
to recognize the other woman's form, blindly but patiently patting at
one of the night tables for the black eye mask that rested there.
Himeko began to reach over to help the other woman, but the cell phone
demanded instant attention. With a sigh, Himeko rolled over herself,
swinging her legs reluctantly off the bed into a sitting position. She
picked the annoying device off the night table on her side of the bed
and sleepily silenced it with a flick.
"Mmmm?" Himeko asked as intelligently as possible at such an ungodly
hour.
"Oh. My. God. Himeko, call that chorus of angels and let the trumpets
of triumph blare! My life's journey is finally complete - I have found
the _perfect_ centerpieces!!"
Himeko crinkled her nose. "M-Mako-chan?" She croaked.
"D'uh! Who else gets away with waking you this early in the morning!
For which I apologize! Erm, well, not really, but oh, Himeko, these
little flower glaze glass thingies are just the cutest things I've ever
laid eyes on! God, I wish you were hear now, so you could tell me if I
should go with the froggies or the dragonflies!"
Frogs? Dragonflies? Wish she were where now??
The last traces of sleep suddenly blinked clear from Himeko's eyes as
her best friend's words finally registered in her mind. "Ohmigod, Mako-
chan! Your wedding!"
"..."
There was a pregnant pause over the line and Himeko could just _hear_
the ellipses of exasperation in Saotome (soon to be Oogami) Makoto's
silence.
"Aaaalright, Himeko, this had _better_ be good. What. Do. You. Mean,
'omigod Mako-chan your wedding'?" There was a very dangerous halting in
the normally cheerful brunette's words.
Himeko swallowed, hastily looking over her shoulder. Chikane had
affixed the eye mask over the white gauze wrapped around her head,
which had loosened precariously throughout the night. The pretty woman
was looking in Himeko's general direction, head cocked cutely to one
side, gorgeous hair in a sexy muss.
A pang of heartache flared briefly in Himeko's chest and she turned
away from her lover. Cupping a hand over the microphone on her cell,
Himeko spoke softly.
"Mako-chan, I... I don't know if I'll be able to make it..."
"WHAT?!"
Himeko winced as she held the phone away from her ear. But before she
could bring it back, she felt a familiar hand touch a shoulder blade
timidly, then glide carefully up her shoulder and down her arm before
grabbing the phone from her outstretched hand. "Chikane-chan!" Himeko
turned to face her beloved who was already speaking into the device
smoothly.
"Good morning, is this Saotome Makoto-san?" Chikane asked politely.
"It's very nice to finally hear your voice, Saotome-san. My name is
Miyahime Chika- " She paused and chuckled softly. "Y-yes, I suppose I
am the infamous lover... yes, I've been looking forward to meeting you
in person too, but, unfortunately, I was in an accident a few days ago
and I don't think... oh, no, I'll be fine. I must be careful for the
next few weeks, but I'll be fine... right. Yes, no, it's alright, I'd
prefer not to go into the details but the point of the matter is that
Himeko is worrying needlessly over me which is why she said what she
did... no, you're perfectly right, as the Maid of Honor, she really
must be there... yes... yes, that's right... Please take my most humble
regrets at not being able to attend your most important day.... oh, of
course! Of course... yes, you take care now too, thank you. I'm going
to hand you back. It was nice to speak with you, Makoto-san."
Chikane held the phone back in Himeko's direction silently.
The blonde stared at the phone and then at her lover and then back at
the phone. Finally, she took it and placed it to her lips. "Mako-chan?"
The brunette began speaking at a thousand words a minute, such that
Himeko could only catch two in seven and wasn't able to interject
with even one of her own. As she struggled to get Makoto's attention,
she looked despairingly over at Chikane, whom had already carefully
fingered her way out of bed, found a wall, and was following it with
slow, precise steps to her ensuite bathroom.
"Mako-chan, please, I can't talk now," Himeko finally managed to break
into the conversation. "I'm sorry, but I'll call you back, alright?"
Not waiting for an answer, Himeko hung up and swiftly made her way over
to the bathroom.
Chikane had already taken off the temporary eye mask and was attempting
to unwind the gauze. Fresh protective coverings, gauze and a white
blindfold were sitting on the sink. Wordlessly, Himeko reached up to
help her lover, touching Chikane's fingers gently. Chikane gave a soft
murmur of disapproval.
"It's alright, Himeko. I want to be able to do this myself."
The blonde woman warred with herself internally, refusing to retract
her hand. "... but you don't have to." She lowered her eyes sadly. "You
didn't have to do that for Mako-chan either..."
"You've been helping her with wedding plans for over a year now,
Himeko." Chikane replied softly. "And you're her Maid of Honor. She
needs you there. You'll regret it if you don't go."
"I'll regret it more if I'm not here for you when you most need me!"
Himeko cried.
The awkward silence made the room feel thick and stuffy. Himeko could
feel Chikane being to tremble. Suddenly, the tall woman whirled around,
pulling her into a tight embrace. Himeko felt a moment of disorientation
at the sudden movement.
"Please, Himeko. Let me be selfish? If I... If I never... I couldn't
bare the thought of holding you back. Go. For me?"
And even though the strong, proud woman hadn't said it, Himeko could
understand Chikane's deep fear through her trembling frame.
Himeko closed her eyes, and wished she could be as strong as her
Chikane-chan was.
***
It was best this way. That was what Chikane kept telling herself as she
sat at her piano bench, back ram-rod straight, fingers intertwined
together and resting in her lap. The clock in the room bonged ten
o'clock in the evening.
Five hours since Himeko had left to catch her train. Sixty one more
until she'd come back.
What if her vision never returned? What if she was fated to a life of
permanent blindness? Would she tether Himeko to her side forever? Doom
her beloved to a life chained to an invalid?
As much as the thought haunted her, hurt her head and sent waves of
nausea to her stomach, still Chikane forced herself to deal with the
possibility. The risk and likelihood were far too high for her to put
off planning for the eventuality until it arrived on her doorstep.
There was a quiet knock at the door, followed by the tell-tale click of
it opening and closing. The soft sounds of slippered feet then padded
across the room, stopping a few feet away from her. Chikane could feel
the presence of her maid and turned to face her direction.
"Ojou-sama... it's really past time for dinner..."
"Thank you, Otoha-san, but I'm still not very hungry. Could you please
give Chef my regrets?"
There was an awkward pause before Otoha spoke again, tone unsure. "Are
you sure that's wise, Ojou-sama? I mean, you barely touched your lunch,
and your afternoon tea is still sitting beside you..."
"I appreciate your concern, Otoha-san, but yes, I am fine." Chikane
gave what she hoped was a soothing smile.
"If... you insist, Ojou-sama."
A moment later, and Chikane could hear the brief clatter of the
untouched tray on the stand beside her being picked up.
"There were a couple of telephone calls earlier. Your agent would like
to pass on the message to you that he is deeply regretful of your
injury and would like to wish for your most rapid recovery. He will
speak with the rest of the Fateful Night staff on Monday and the concert
will be canceled."
Chikane nodded, turning back to face her piano. She wondered how
agitated her agent was. Fateful Night was supposed to have been her
first solo performance in Japan. Tickets had been sold out for several
weeks already, and the buzz on the scene had been palpable. It was a
pity; Chikane would have liked very much to have Himeko finally come to
her debut.
"The second call was from Goshuujin-sama. Your agent felt it was
pertinent to inform your parents of the situation and they will be
returning as soon as they can."
Chikane frowned. That was rather odd. "I see. Do they know when they
will return?"
"No. It seems that Goshuujin-sama is unable to leave negotiations with
the Ogasawara Zaibatsu without suffering significant setbacks, so..."
Ah. The sounded more right. Whilst her parents had ensured that she
received the best education and opportunities money could buy, their
presence was one thing they could never seem to afford. She hadn't seen
them in years. So, 'soon' was a very relative word.
"Thank you, Otoha-san." Chikane politely intoned. "If there's nothing
else, then you may retire for the evening."
"Yes, Ojou-sama. Thank you." The slight clinking of the cutlery told
Chikane that Otoha-san had turned around, but when the clinking
continued, and the maid's presence continued to make itself known,
Chikane turned to the other woman's general direction once more.
"Yes?"
"Ojou-sama," there was more than a hint of nervousness in Otoha's
voice. "Since... since you have so graciously offered me an early
retirement this evening, may... may I request that I spent it in the
accompaniment of yourself and perhaps a few ballads?"
Chikane lifted her eyebrows in surprise. "You'd like me to play for
you?"
"If you wouldn't mind too terribly much..." Now Otoha's voice was
almost gushing.
Chikane considered this before nodding. "Alright, I think I can manage
that much. What would you have me play?"
The clinking sounds signified that Otoha had put down the dishes once
more. There was a brief pause before Chikane heard her maid's voice
again, this time further away, and to her other side, where she knew
several comfortable armchairs were arranged. "Anything you desire,
Ojou-sama, from your own repertoire, please."
The young pianist felt a small smile crack the face. "I've been
practicing those for weeks on end, for the concert. Are you sure you're
not sick of them?"
"Never, Ojou-sama." Otoha's voice was oddly vehement. "Never."
So Chikane accommodated, putting her fingers to the ivories. She began
with the songs she'd first penned while in adolescence, the ones that
had first gotten her noticed from amongst all the other faces, the ones
that spoke of a haunting loneliness while trapped for an eternity of
solitude, of a confused longing for an unrequited time that never was,
of the ache of a painfully familiar face caught perfectly in a dream,
yet rendered _just_ blurrily beyond recognition in life.
These songs were hit and miss. While some listeners found them brimming
with delicious agony, others found the intensity too plain a force to
contemplate. She hadn't played these songs in a while - ever since
Himeko had walked into her life. She hadn't needed to, until now.
Her fingers took on lives of their own, dancing down unfamiliar paths,
composing a requiem of regret by ear. Solemn notes chased fleeting
moments of happiness through the wind, until they dissipated into
emptiness. Strains of melancholy blew at candles of hope that struggled
once, twice, and then were no more.
And as her fingers hit the final keys, and those notes sounded
mournfully and faded to nothing, Chikane became aware of labored,
forced breathing in the room.
"Otoha-san?"
Her maid made some hasty noises to try to calm herself but not before
Chikane could tell she was crying.
"Otoha-san, are you alright?" Standing up from her seat, Chikane took
several uncertain steps towards the sounds before stopping.
"That... that was beautiful, Ojou-sama." Otoha said - hiccupped - her
voice growing closer. And then Chikane could feel her maid grasp her
elbow uncertainly. "It was new, wasn't it? I didn't recognize it."
Chikane nodded, suddenly feeling drained. She let her maid guide her
out of the music room, feeling a small comfort that Otoha-san would
know her desire to retire to her chambers. "Yes, I suppose it was."
"What do you call it?"
The pianist considered this silently for a moment.
Happiness followed by regret. Hope followed by loss. Wholeness turned
to lonely dust.
There was only one appropriate name for this piece.
"Yahari." Chikane finally decided.
Yahari. As expected.
***
Silently, faithfully, Otoha Keiko helped her Ojou-sama to re-dress
wounds, and undress clothing. Tenderly, she smoothed the healing cream
that could mean the difference between future and death over swollen
flesh, before ensuring that the gauze was tight enough to protect
damaged eyes, while loose enough to allow her Ojou-sama a reasonably
comfortable rest.
She brushed out Chikane's long hair lovingly, stroke by maddeningly
careful stroke, until the blue-black curtain shimmered softly, seeming
to dance in the dim glow of the room.
She put her charge to bed, pulling the covers up and whispering a soft
goodnight.
She walked to the bedroom door, turned off the light, opened the
door... and then shut it again. Then she silently waited for her eyes
to adjust to the dark - wondering if this was what Ojou-sama's world
was like - before sitting in one of the chairs that dotted Ojou-sama's
room, and silently watched the beautiful woman sleep.
Chikane fell into a very deep sleep very shortly thereafter, and Keiko
felt the knots in her chest relax ever so slightly as she gazed
longingly at the peaceful expression on the younger woman's face.
One hour, two hours, Keiko couldn't tell how many hours had passed but
she deemed it cruelly not enough before that peaceful expression she
treasured so much was lost to groans of fitfulness and gasps of
struggle.
Alarmed, Keiko headed over to her Ojou-sama's bedside immediately,
feeling a great piercing in her chest that she could not sooth her most
loved one's hurt beyond gingerly brushing aside Chikane's hair and
cooing softly and wordlessly, without giving away her presence.
Keiko watched helplessly as Chikane tossed, hands clenching and
unclenching, the nightmares relentlessly seizing her until all her
horrors welled up into a tiny, child-like voice, begging, "Himeko...
please... don't leave me..."
Keiko felt her heart crash into her stomach as she heard her Ojou-
sama's plea. 'She's not here', she wanted to say. 'That foolish woman
listened to your words, Ojou-sama, not your heart...'
But Keiko... Keiko knew how to listen to her Ojou-sama's heart.
Silently, she moved away from the bed, out the room and down the hall,
careful to open and close the door with not a lick of sound.
She walked quickly to Kurusugawa-sama's room, went straight to the
drawers and pulled out a pair of the blonde woman's pajamas. Moving
purposefully, she went to the bathroom and undressed. Spying her Ojou-
sama's most beloved's shampoos, body washes and perfumes, she carefully
picked one up, and began to wash...
***
Himeko was dressed in a beige sweater and a teal blue pleated skirt. A
string of pearls rested around her neck and her hair was done up in
twin braids. It was a Himeko whom Chikane knew she hadn't met in this
life. The girl was far younger than even when they had first met. But
she was still unmistakably, irrevocably, her beloved.
Himeko's voice was soft, sweet, lovetorn. "You told me the story of the
seashells before, right, Chikane-chan? How there's just one person
waiting for me..."
Chikane smiled a bittersweet smile, glad the other girl was not looking
at her, and yet also aching with the wish that the one Himeko saw in
the distance was herself. "Yes, I remember..."
The corners of Himeko's mouth turned up shyly, heart-breakingly so. "I
think that unique person waiting for me... might be Souma-kun. When I'm
with Souma-kun, my heart races, so rapidly..."
And as Himeko's voice trailed off, Chikane felt her own shrivel up and
die in her throat. Unbidden, unwanted, a cruel voice echoed through her
head.
'Your love, will never be requited...'
Chikane swallowed. She impulsively grabbed Himeko and pulled her
into a tight embrace against her chest.
Himeko made a noise of surprise. "Chikane-chan?"
"I'm happy for you," Chikane whispered. She kept her head lifted,
gazing forlornly upwards as tears welled up in her eyes. "I'm happy for
you..."
And then, suddenly, Himeko disappeared from her arms. Alarmed, Chikane
looked wildly all around the room, before she saw her beloved standing
a few feet from her.
Himeko's hair was shorter now; she was a few years older. She was _her_
Himeko. She wore a regretful expression as she held onto her suitcase.
She looked over her shoulder once, and then turned back to regard
Chikane, eyes brimming with unshed tears. "Well then... if this is what
you really want..." This was what Himeko had said before she'd left for
the wedding. "Goodbye..."
Chikane clenched her fists.
No. Of course that wasn't what she wanted! How could it be?!
"Himeko!!" Chikane leapt forward, trying to grasp her beloved in her
Arms. Instead, she fell headlong into a spiraling, never-ending tunnel
of black. There was nothing. Nothing at all but lonely, lonely darkness.
A dark, deep, cruel voice laughed at her as she fell.
'You will never be with her again! Never! You threw away your chance
and now, you will know nothing but despair!'
Chikane lashed out desperately. "No! I will! I will! Himeko! HIMEKO!!"
"Shh... Shhhh..."
And suddenly, Himeko was there. In the horror and the confusion and the
dark, dark nothingness, she could feel her beloved holding her
sweating, pitiful body. Himeko's scent filled her nose, powerful and
sweet, smelling of summer and sunlight. Chikane could feel her lover's
hands gently stroking her hair.
Chikane tried to swallow, throat dry. "H-Himeko?"
Her beloved continued to make soft, soothing noises.
Chikane choked back a sob. Oh gods, how pitiful she was. How could she
ever have contemplating going on without her beloved? There was no life
without Himeko! She buried her head into Himeko's ample bosom, wrapping
her arms tightly around the other woman, inhaling her beloved's familiar,
signature perfume.
She could never let Himeko go. No. Never.
With trembling hands, she reached up, felt the side of Himeko's face and
pulled her lover down into a deep, demanding kiss. The intensity of her
need surprised the other woman - it was surprising even to Chikane
herself.
Himeko resisted, jerking backwards, but when Chikane refused to let her
go, she began to melt into the kiss, responding back.
With trembling fingers, Chikane pulled open Himeko's pajamas, causing
stubborn buttons to pop. Her mouth and hands roamed over a body made
almost unfamiliar by the trauma of her dreams.
She heard Himeko gasp, voice raspy and almost unrecognizable with
throaty arousal. "W-wait! Chi-Chikannngh...!"
But Chikane could not wait. She silenced her lover with another kiss.
She had to make Himeko hers. Hers and only hers.
***
To Be Continued
**********************************************************************
AUTHOR'S NOTES & OMAKE
I'm not sure why this idea wouldn't leave me alone. Maybe it's because
Chikane-chan's uber competence, while amazingly cool and sexy, was just
begging to be toyed with. =P
Anyway, for those of you expecting more lemony material, my apologies
(but honestly, do ya really want to read about Chikane + anyone besides
Himeko?!). There exists an opportunity for more explicit disclosure in
the next chapter, and the chapter after that (this fic is planned to
be three chapters long), but I probably won't take that opportunity,
in order to keep this fic to a Lime rating, rather than a full blown
Lemon. Those scenes will probably be released as a separate 0.5
chapter, once the main story is told. Because muse-chan is sort of
begging to write them now. >_<
Many thanks to those of you who read Finally Healing! Your kind words
are a big reason why this fic was born. And a big thank you to Eimii.
I only hope to be able to have 1/34th of your mad English and
yarn-spinning skillz at some point in time.
Thanks for reading!
And here are omake, because this fic, and KnM in general, have a lot of
omake worthy moments...
***
OMAKE I - Someone's in a Good Mood...
<It is the morning after, and Chikane and Himeko are sitting at the
dinner table waiting for breakfast. Whaddaya mean it doesn't make
sense and Himeko's left for Mako-chan's wedding? Just ignore that for
now. Chikane keeps trying to hide behind a massive newspaper>
OTOHA: <rolls in on the morning breakfast dolly like a kid on a
shopping cart> Goooood Morning! Isn't it a beeeeeaaaauuuuutiful day?!
CHIKANE: <sweatdropping massively. Murmurs> Ohayo...
HIMEKO: <Surprised> Otoha-san... you're positively glowing!
OTOHA: <Puts a hand up to her cheek coyly> Aaaaaaaam I??
HIMEKO: <Slightly frightened smile> Y-yes? What's put you in such a
good mood?
OTOHA: Ohohohoho! That, Kurusugawa-sama, is a secret! <Turns to grab
food to put on table>
HIMEKO: <sweatdropping> Eheh... <whispers to CHIKANE> I think someone
got laid last night...
CHIKANE: <rips the paper in two with nervous energy> Itwasn'tmeiswear!!
***
OMAKE II - Why They were in the Dark Room in the First Place...
HIMEKO: Chikane-chan... are you sure we should be doing this...?
<putting print into developer with tongs>
CHIKANE: Well... would you rather we got these done by some teenager at
Walmart?
HIMEKO: <wrinkles her nose> No... but... <pauses> Saay, you're
fabulously rich! Why haven't you given me a digital camera yet?
CHIKANE: Uh... <sweatdrops>
HIMEKO: <Distracted> Oh! It's coming! It's...! <Looks at picture>
<blushes profusely> ...
CHIKANE: ... wow. <grins stupidly at HIMEKO> See, I told you the
handcuffs would be more dramatic than the whip!
HIMEKO: <continues to blush profusely> ...
CHIKANE: Hmm..., I shouldn't have zoomed in so much. I cut off your
stilettos. Rats. And they were so cute on you too...
**********************************************************************
.---Anime/Manga Fanfiction Mailing List----.
| Administrators - ffml-admins@anifics.com |
| Unsubscribing - ffml-request@anifics.com |
| Put 'unsubscribe' in the subject |
`---- http://ffml.anifics.com/faq.txt -----'