Ah, finally, I have time to finish and post this!

Yet another previously unpublished story set in my "Thy Outward Part"
universe.  This will be the last one, I promise.

Aww. :(

But then, you said the same thing with Serendipity :)

Same protestations as before:  this story is a bit gratuitous in that it
really doesn't cover anything new.  It takes place during the events of 
"The
Nature of Love", during the weeks where Ranma and Kentaro are separated.

So, to put it in its proper context, you should prolly read "Thy Outward
Part" and "The Nature of Love":

http://www.sterman.org/top.html

http://www.sterman.org/tnol.html

As well as "Technical Virginity" to understand a brief time-lapse. ;)

He says he loves my daughter.
I think so too; for never gazed the moon
Upon the water as he'll stand and read
As 'twere my daughter's eyes.
And, to be plain,
I think there is not half a kiss to choose
Who loves another best.

      -The Winter's Tale
       Act IV, Scene IV
       William Shakespeare

Oh, very nice. But I find it very difficult to associate it literally with 
the characters: at first blush, knowing the context of the TOP saga, I read 
it as a reference to Kentaro's feelings towards Ranma, which would be an 
awkward opinion for the Saotomes to have. Yet, within this installment, it 
could also refer to the unique relationship that Ranma and Akane build, but 
Soun is pretty much absent throughout the series.

Oddly enough? It could also hint at "Serendipity," and Ranma's acceptance of 
his/her dual nature. I really like the quote for its allegory, and how it 
can describe all three of Ranma relationships, even if I can't give it a 
literal attribution within either context.

Ranma stood on the porch, staring at the pond as the early-morning sun 
shone
off of it.  It looked pretty, the ripples seeming to be made of gold. 
Ranma
lost himself in the patterns, watching them mix and reform.

I enjoyed the opening with Ranma watching the pond, especially since you 
later close the story with Akane leaping into it. Really, the amount of 
symbolism that goes into the Tendo pond in this story is astounding, and 
opening with Ranma's contemplation makes for brilliant thematic 
foreshadowing.

(The wording in particular is _inspired_. Ranma losing himself in the 
mixing, reforming patterns on the water? Given his current condition, with 
all those unresolved identity issues? Hat's off to you, sir.)

Someone came up beside him.  Someone whose presence he felt like fire on 
his
skin.

That's because that someone had just accidentally dumped her omelette on top 
of him. Ow!

"Good morning.  How are you feeling?"

It was a very good question.  Waking up had been very disorienting, and he
was only now getting back to a state of relative equilibrium.  "Fine, I
guess."

After six years of waking up as a girl, "disorienting" is probably an 
understatement.

Ranma shrugged.  "It's funny.  I just don't feel like myself.  I mean, 
this
is me, the real me, this is what I wanted for so long.  But... I mean, 
part
of me, it really was starting to accept what I was like before, and now 
it's
freaking out a little."  He patted his chest almost unconsciously.

Hmm, I wonder what's freaking him out, exactly. On the one hand, he might be 
unnerved that he was starting to accept his previous situation, which might 
seem distant now that he's a man. On the other, it could be that, having 
begun to accept it, being able to turn into a man again has knocked him off 
whatever balance he had achieved, and _that's_ what freaks him out.

Aah, vague statements, they make for such contrasting yet valid views. :)

More silence.  Then his hand was gently clasped, a smaller hand fitting
inside his.  That too felt strange, he expected the hand to be larger.
Almost awkwardly he held on, trying to draw a degree of comfort from the
contact.

Interesting that he's still disassociating as a force of habit, especially 
since he has to catch himself from doing it later on. He's drawing comfort 
from the touch itself, where by all rights he should draw it from Akane's 
presence.

 Although he had only lived
here for a couple of years, it was the first place that had ever felt like
home, and it was wonderful to return.  He was Ranma, a man, and beside him
was a woman, his fianc�e, and he felt moved almost to tears by how
comfortable that felt.

That's because it IS home, in every sense of the word, and whenever he 
thinks of it he thinks of himself as a man, with Akane always nearby. It's a 
return to normalcy and stability, or at least the hope that he will find 
them there.

Besides, he was all but a pariah to them for the last three years. Feeling 
himself welcome with Akane, and at the Tendo home, must be cathartic.

The dining room was crowded again, snapping Ranma back to the present. 
His
father and mother sat on the far side of the table, next to Akane's 
father.
Tofu sat next to where Kasumi was carefully lowering herself.  Nabiki,
looking mildly grumpy, had a wide space next to her, the place reserved 
for
Ranma and Akane.

Why is Nabiki grumpy? Because she thinks she might have read Kentaro wrong 
after all, and she drew the wrong conclusions? Or is her mind already hard 
at work churning out a justification for what she saw up on the mountain? 
Again, nice and open characterization with just a small indication of her 
mood.

"I want to set a date as soon as possible."  His mother beamed at him from
across the table.  "Perhaps Midsummer's Day."

Uh, yeah. Nice way to bring down the mood, Mrs. Saotome.

"Mother," Ranma interrupted.  "Please, I need some time.  A lot's 
happened,
I need to... to internalize it all.

Ergh, I agree that this doesn't sound like a word Ranma would typically use. 
Maybe three years of listening to Kentaro has refined his speech, I'll give 
you that. In any case, depending on the meaning of "internalize" that 
Ranma's going by, I'm not sure that's what he should be doing --it's easier 
and much more effective for him to sort out his problems by sharing them, or 
at least venting, like past TOP installments have shown.

If he's using another meaning of the word, then it's definitely not a 
concept Ranma would use in regular conversation. (Unless his Psych and 
Sociology courses in college were more advanced than I give them credit for. 
:P)

 I don't want to rush into anything.  I
mean, rushing headfirst into situations is what started this all in the
first place."

This and many others yet to come. ;]

"Ranma."  Mother was clearly trying to be as calm and reasonable as
possible.  "The sooner you and Akane get married, the better everyone will
feel, including yourself."

That's an awfully egocentric way to look at an extremely complex situation.

Mother thinned her lips but made a visible effort not to respond angrily.
"Many... unfortunate things have happened.  I desperately wish I could 
undo
what had happened.  But you must accept-"

"You wish you could undo?"  Ranma matched glares with his mother.  "I'm
curious.  What is it that you wish you could undo, exactly?"

Yeah, she could've phrased that better.

Ranma dropped his gaze, feeling his face burn slightly.  Here he'd been
passing judgment on his mother, and he barely knew her.

To be fair, it worked both ways. She might have rigid notions about honor 
and duty, but she doesn't _know_ Ranma at all, or what he has lived through. 
All she knows about him is a bit of the Ranko charade, and maybe the few 
days between his return to the Dojo and this moment --and she's very prompt 
to pass judgment on him and his choices nonetheless.

The pond was no longer gold-tipped, the sun having risen, leaving it 
looking
plain.  Ranma amused himself with analogies.

Wholly appropriate ones, though. :)

"Ranma."  The presence was there, again.  Being quiet and solicitous, in a
way so different from all those years ago.  "What's wrong?"

What he reads as quiet and solicitous might be, in reality, apprehensive and 
possessive, even if she doesn't realize it herself.

"C'mon, I just met you again a couple of weeks ago, and we're supposed to 
be
married in less than a month?

(...never mind all the painful partings and fights, which would need to be 
healed first anyway...)

"Well... I mean, it was too much for him."  Akane was speaking quietly but
forcefully; Ranma wasn't sure if he was just imagining the hint of
vindication in her voice.

Inner Akane: I won! I won! Woohoo!

"I don't know.  I can't.  Maybe it was too much too soon; after all, we 
had
been giving his psyche a good beating.  Maybe the reality that you could
become a guy just caused him to blow a circuit.  Maybe he'll give you a 
call
once he's calmed down."

Maybe.  Ranma had found himself jumping at the sound of every phone call 
to
the house.  But it had been two days now, and nothing.

The time-jump here broke the pacing a little, and it threw off my timeline. 
Has it been two days since the mountain? When I read TNL, I thought that 
only a week or so had passed between Akane's arrival and finding the kettle, 
so Ranma's mention of "a couple of weeks ago" against this "two days" 
disoriented me.

And why the hell should he care, anyway?  Kentaro had left him.  At what
should have been one of the high points in Ranma's existence, one person 
who
had helped him survive to reach it had abandoned him.  Over a stupid, 
silly
thing.

Er, stupid and silly? Just _what_ is he thinking about here? Even if he's 
blaming it on Kentaro not accepting him as a man, that's in no way stupid or 
silly, even for Ranma.

Akane drew in a deep breath, then let it loose slowly.  Not quite a sigh,
but very close.  Dealing with Ranma was an emotionally draining task.  But
the end reward would be worth it, if she could just find a way to guide 
him
where he truly wanted to go.

Ah, but when even HE has yet to discover that, how can she presume to know? 
She's being terribly short-sighted, not to mention selfish, by trying to 
guide him where _she_ thinks he should go.

"Poor guy," Nabiki commented.  "Sometimes I wonder if we really did him a
favor finding that kettle."

"Oh come on."  Akane turned to face her sister.  "You saw how much he 
wanted
it, how excited he was when he found it.  He wants this, he's wanted it 
for
years.

As much as I agree with the overall sentiment, because it eventually led to 
freedom of choice rather than an imposed situation, it's obvious Akane has 
never heard the expression "be careful what you wish for." :P

"Oh, that will be easy."  Akane looked back at the dojo.  "I mean, it was 
so
unnatural, he was fighting himself the whole time.  Now that he doesn't 
have
to, he'll come around.  It was such a hell for him but he was finding a 
way
through it, because that's the kind of man he is.  Strong and stubborn and
willful.  Now he's back home and cured, and he doesn't need to fight any
more.  He's where he belongs."

"God, Akane."  Nabiki sounded close to disgust.  "Sometimes you make me
sick.  Are you really so incapable of seeing anything except in terms of 
how
it affects you?"

Kudos to Nabiki for expressing pretty much what I was thinking. I don't like 
her character very much from the manga, but her characterization here shows 
an astonishing degree of maturity from her.

"And you don't know anything about what's happening between me and Ranma.
So back off."

Ahaha. Yeah, she's being very, very close-minded, especially when it's 
because of Nabiki that there even _is_ a chance for anything to happen 
between her and Ranma.

"What, and leave you two miserable?  I wouldn't be much of a sister if I 
did
that."

"We won't be miserable!  We'll be happy!"

Selfish, close-minded and in complete denial. Has it ever occurred to her 
that, even if Ranma goes on his merry way without a single hangup, he might 
still choose not to marry her?

If you truly want a chance of happiness with him, then
help him.  And I mean really help, just don't sit there assuming 
everything
will work itself out."

"...or that it has to work in _your_ favor for him to be happy..."

Silence descended.  Akane felt Nabiki's words echoing through her head, 
and
they filled her with anger and despair in equal amounts.  Was everyone so
blind?  Could no one see how right this was for Ranma?

What is? Being free to be male again, or being with her? Because, as far as 
she's concerned, he has no choice but to marry her anyway.

Ranma eyed the shirt uncertainly.  Short-sleeved, blue, with a collar.  It
made him look older, somehow.  He wasn't certain he wanted to be older.

And he certainly didn't want to be a blue-collar worker.

Ranma had agreed reluctantly,
certain that the trip would be accomplished quickly so that he could go 
back
to brooding.

There's a lot of brooding to be done, and by golly, he was going to do as 
much of it as possible!

(Amazing that Nodoka didn't come along, like she usually does in "Ranma goes 
shopping!" fic scenes ;P)

He hadn't accounted for Akane.  She had taken to the task with a will.
Ranma tended to grab the first thing that was cheap and didn't look ugly.
Akane had lots to say about color, texture, and fabric.

Unfortunately, her ability to pick color, texture and fabric ran along the 
same lines as her cooking skill.

 It felt odd to be looking down at some
people again.  In almost every situation at college he had been the 
smallest
adult present.

Heh. You'd think that, since he takes so much after Nodoka, his female half 
would be as tall as she is.

Akane chose a small diner.  They went inside and were quickly seated.  The
server hurried up with two menus and two glasses of water.  In her rush, 
she
very nearly spilled the water and was saved by a quick grab of one of the
glasses by Ranma.

This works twofold: first, as a bit of foreshadowing for his claim later on 
that he won't change unless it's by his own choice (plus, it keeps him male 
until the actual moment of truth,) as well as an instance of wry irony in 
that he _finally_ learned to stop these accidents even though he doesn't 
really have to anymore.

Akane looked down at the water, glanced around the diner, seeing all the
people drinking hot beverages, looked back at Ranma.  "Did... how did you
get over that?"

"Well, you know, I think I did the right thing by going to college.
Eventually I got so busy I stopped worrying about it."

"As easy as that?"  Akane sounded skeptical.

It surprises me that Akane doesn't stop to consider that _she_ pretty much 
pushed him in that direction.

"Well... no."  Ranma took a sip of the water.  "It took a lot of time. 
But
you know, I still remember the first time I entered the shower and didn't
expect to change.  It was a shock that I had forgotten to remember."

"A shock that you were adjusting?  Accepting it, even?"

"Yeah.  And I hated myself for accepting it.  I didn't want to be... her."

"But her was you."

O_O Good God, woman, do you realize what you've just said? You're implying 
that "she" was him all along, and that doesn't exactly help your case if you 
want to help him put that in the past.

(Technical: I'd add single quotes around "her," or change it to "she." The 
former would denote emphatic repetition of Ranma's "her" while the latter 
would be grammatically correct if that's not her intention.)

"I don't see how else you could've.  I was being pretty obtuse.
Deliberately so.

"I was being pretty obtuse, deliberately." While it's correct as it is now, 
and even allowing for Ranma's expanded vocab, "Deliberately so" is a 
structure that I can't quite see him using.

Ranma felt his own smile fade.  "Yeah.  I think you should have.  But I 
also
told you to go away.  I should have kept in touch, let you know when I was
recovering, all that.  I... regret that."

Oh, _that_ would've turned the whole thing on its head. I can't imagine what 
could've resulted from a locked Ranma telling a distant Akane that she was 
dating Kentaro. Maybe Akane would've been creeped out at first, but maybe 
she would have been supportive from the start. And THAT would have led to 
endless problems with Nodoka.

The server came back and after a hurried consultation of the menu they
ordered.  When she was away Akane considered Ranma again.  "So at the
beginning it was terrible.  Tell me what it was like at the end. 
Before...
before I showed up."

Ranma: I was about to try out what I read in all those lemons. You kinda 
cramped my style, though.

I had a class of martial
arts students that let me instruct them,

Innnnteresting phrasing.

I was doing well in my classes, I
got along with my dormmates... it was great.  I mean, I hadn't really been
that much a part of something, anything.  Even at Furinkan.  The only 
thing
that came close to that was when I was with you guys, when Pop and I were
eating one of Kasumi's dinners with everyone.  It was like that, except 
all
the time."

Well, there's the difference between being part of a family, and being part 
(and center!) of a community.

"Were you going to live with him?"

Ranma felt his face beginning to burn.  "I was... ready to hear him offer
it.  I was prepared to be convinced by him that it wouldn't be a bad 
idea."

*chuckle* I like the way he admits it.

"Thanks."  Ranma braved a smile, then mechanically began working on 
placing
food into his mouth.

Akane picked up her own chopsticks but seemed more interested in pushing 
her
food about the plate.

She was so distracted, she didn't notice when it started pushing back.

"We never did enough of this.  I mean talk like this,
really try to understand one another."

............

Well, when one of you likes taunting and sniping, and the other responds to 
that with a mallet or a convenient stone lantern, heartfelt chats become 
somewhat of a rare commodity :P

Ranma swallowed his latest shovelful.  "When I was sixteen I thought I 
knew
everything I needed to know.  When I was eighteen, I thought I had become
such a tragic figure that I had accumulated the wisdom of the ages.  Now I
know that all along I knew nothing, and that I still don't know nothing
about anything."

Agreed on the comment that the shift in language seems very awkward here.

"Ranma, I need to know.  You said that at that time and at that
place, you loved Kentaro.  What about here and now?  Do you still love 
him?"

"Damn, you don't know when to let up, do you?"

Well, she's been rather selfish about a lot of things lately, but this, at 
least, she deserves.

Akane didn't even blink.  "I think it's the core of everything you have to
decide from this point on."

That too.

"Maybe... maybe you should call him.  Talk to him."

"No."  Ranma was slightly surprised by the force of that word.  "He can't
take it, then screw him.  I'm not about to beg him for support."

Akane chewed her lip.  "But... you need to find out if you're still in 
love
with him."

"Well, he made the choice that whatever decision I made would be without 
his
input."

"That almost sounds like an answer itself."

"I know, but..."  Ranma shook his head.  "It's hard.  To just let go. 
God,
it sounds weak to say that."

"It's better to admit that than pretend you know an answer you don't 
feel."
Akane cupped her chin with one hand.  "I think you know that by now."

"Maybe."  Ranma stood up.  "Let's go."

Akane nodded.  She left some money on the table and they left to go back
home.

This time Ranma found the handed closest to Akane's was free.  So he took
her hand in his, and this time it didn't feel wrong.

That's because, through all this exchange, Akane actually tried to help him 
based on his own feelings and thoughts as opposed to what _she_ thought he 
should do. Since he appreciates that (albeit subconsciously) he can 
appreciate the comfort of her presence now.

---

Ranma leaned back in his chair and stretched.  As always, it felt both
wonderful and strange that an uncontrollable mass on his chest didn't 
shift
when he did this.

I... think _someone_ in one of her clubs should've clued her in to the 
miracles of athletic support :P

With a yawn, Ranma looked back down at the column of figures he had been
playing with.  Trying to calculate how much money he'd need to open his 
own
dojo.  Of course Akane's father had made it clear that the Tendo Dojo was
his if he married Akane, and that would certainly make things very easy.
Still, Ranma felt a need to see how expensive it would be to do things
completely on his own.  The numbers were discouraging - he'd need quite a
sum on money, and he'd have to find someone willing to lend it to him when
he had no collateral.  Maybe his former college advisor would know 
someone.

Of course, if Ranma walked into his office, he wouldn't be recognized.
Ranma looked out the window into the darkened back yard.

I'm not sure if the "wouldn't be recognized" sentence should be part of the 
new paragraph. It might work better as a stand-alone statement, or as a 
conclusion to the prior paragraph.

  The pond could be
easily made out in the light of the moon.

(snip)

Tonight, for the first time, he felt something stirring, a desire to 
resume
his college form.

Hee! Here we go with the shifting symbolism again :)

Ranma sighed and walked over to his closet.  He changed into his pajamas -
it was well past his normal bedtime - and found his eyes resting on a 
small
barrel stuffed in the back.  His thoughts grew morose, and he wondered if
he'd ever have the courage to use it.

I'm downright amazed nobody has _told_ him to use it, especially Nodoka (who 
might not now, admittedly.)

Firmly Ranma slid the closet door closed.  He walked back over to his desk
and just as he was about to turn off the lamp, a gentle knocking came from
the hallway.

Ranma froze, if only for a second.  Then he walked over to the hallway 
door
and opened it.  Akane, dressed in slightly oversized flannel pajamas, 
stood
looking at him.  "May I come in?" she said in a near whisper.

Hmm. I suppose the Saotomes are over at their own house tonight?

Her face was quiet and composed.  Her face was also beautiful, her best
feature by far.

Likewise, the intended emphasis doesn't exactly work here. If you want to 
keep it, I suggest moving the second "her face" around in the second 
sentence, see where it fits better.

Ranma sat there, his heart pounding and his mind numb.  This past week had
been full of time spent talking with Akane, about everything but the
subjects of their discussion in the diner.  They had gone out to movies 
and
such, and more often than not he had held her hand, and more often than 
not
had enjoyed it.  But nothing more physical than that, nothing even hinted 
at
until Akane presented herself at the door and put herself in his bed.

"In" or "on" his bed?

Neither of them spoke.  Akane was just sitting patiently, waiting,
occasionally shifting position but never touching him.  The message was
clear; Ranma would have to initiate everything.  She had come this far, he
would have to do the rest.

In a way it made Ranma angry and reminded him vaguely of Kentaro's worst
trait, that of pushing Ranma at times when Ranma needed to work things out
himself.  Akane clearly had grown impatient and was forcing something 
Ranma
wasn't sure he was prepared to do.

Well, yes. But in Kentaro's case, it was _because_ it was a deliberate push. 
I think Akane is merely playing to traditional gender roles, allowing the 
man to take the first action.

(Of course, as the second paragraph notes, she's forcing the whole _idea_ in 
general terms.)

Ranma turned his head, and Akane stopped straightening the crease of her
pajama bottoms and returned his look.  He leaned forward and she cocked 
her
head to one side and leaned forward as well.  Their lips touch and 
instantly
she parted her lips and they began tasting each other.

touch->touched

Ranma closed his eyes.  This was it, a man and a woman kissing.  Almost
instinctively his mind began disassociating, detaching itself from his 
body.
And then he remembered that he was the male in this exchange.

Ranma: D'oh!

I can't figure out what the hell is wrong with me."

"Then let's figure it out together," Akane gently prompted.  "Why don't 
you
feel good kissing a woman?"

HAH! That was so very Kentaro-esque of her :D

"I... wanted to stay, wanted to be friends."

"But not my fianc�e.  Not... you weren't going to... give me what I 
needed."

Akane looked down.  "God, Ranma, if only I'd known.  I... the reasons I
broke up with you, we've been over them a thousand times."

But that's just it: the "if only" doesn't exist, the point is living with 
the choices you've made and how they affected those around you.

"I know.  I know.  We agreed, logically it made sense."

Should there be a comma after "logically," or should the word come at the 
end of the sentence?

After the door closed, Ranma stood up and looked back out into the yard,
staring at a certain point until clouds covered the moon and the rain 
began,
covering the yard in wet blackness.

Ranma: (yelling at the sky) Do you mind!? I'm not in the mood for allegories 
right now, much less insightful ones!

"I said don't ask me that!"  Akane finally relented, shaking out her fists
and glaring at Nabiki.  "There's like a thousand questions to be answered
before that.  Ask me again in a week."

*laugh* Nope, I don't think she's thinking all too clearly. :)

"Will it be a week?"  Nabiki took a sip of the tea she held in a cup in 
her
hands while sitting on the porch.  "I mean, it's been a month already and 
I
don't see that you guys have made a lot of progress."

To be fair, it took Ranma three years and the better part of a fourth to be 
comfortable with a new and strange situation. That it takes him a month to 
"recovering" from it isn't that far-fetched.

Akane massaged her hands.  "He needs more time.  And I'm not about to go
apply a lot of pressure.  There are some things he needs to work out on 
his
own.  I've told him where I stand."

"And where do you stand?"

"I..."  Akane drew a breath.  "I want to say I love him.  If he gives me 
the
slightest indication, I will."

And why doesn't she come out herself and actually _say_ it, without waiting 
for a cue? Is it because she's having her own doubts about it?

"I see."  Nabiki took another long sip of her tea.  "I want to tell you
something.  Something that I think may explain a lot to Ranma and help him
figure out what to do.  But that something may not be... favorable to your
cause.  You asked me not to interfere, so I won't.  But if you want to 
know
something that will help Ranma, I'm prepared to tell you."

Blankly, Akane considered Nabiki.  Her sister wasn't returning her gaze,
instead looking out into the yard, her tea cupped in front of her face.
This was so totally unlike Nabiki that it frightened Akane a little.

Which meant that whatever Nabiki had to share, it couldn't be good news.

If that's why it frightens Akane, it scares the hell out of me for a 
different reason --it says, to me, that Nabiki doesn't feel she's in control 
of the situation. She usually stares down people to impose her will or at 
least to challenge them, because she feels confident she can, and will, come 
out on top. If she's looking away, it means she doesn't have that certainty 
anymore, and can't even bring up a bluster to work with. The posture, 
sipping her tea and with her hands close to her face, gives me a mental 
image of her shrinking into herself, telling me that she's not only 
uncertain, she's very nervous, a very rare display of weakness for her.

All he saw
was Ranma curing himself with the kettle and becoming a man.  I think
Kentaro thought that was permanent.  I think that's why he ran."

And he raaaan, he ran so far awaaaaay...

Akane entered the room to see Ranma pacing frenetically.  He was antsy,
unable to sit still, flitting about the room like an overactive moth. 
Akane
knew enough of Ranma's habits to realize what this all meant: he was close
to deciding something.

It would've made for such a delightful parallel if she had asked him, at 
some point, "Is that smoke I smell?" :P

"I think you are."  Akane spoke probingly, quiet but forceful, needing to
know.  "I think the very fact that you're seeking him out means that 
you're
giving him another chance.  You want him to apologize, to work things out
between you, to make the relationship possible again."

Oh my God, it's spreading. She knew him for only a couple of days, but she 
caught the bug. Quick! Someone seal Kentaro in a bubble before his 
rationalization skills infect the rest of the household!

"Whaddya mean!"  Ranma's expression turned dark.  "He sure had no problem
leaving me when-"

"Unless," Akane interrupted, "he thought you had left him first."

Ranma stared at her quizzically.  Then, almost comically, his eyes widened
and lost focus.  "Oh my."

@_@ He was awfully, awfully _quick_ to pick up her meaning from that.

Akane waited, willing understanding into him.  The fact that he seemed to
have stopped breathing, though, was a good sign that he had made the
connection himself.

"Oh my," he said again.  Finally his eyes focused back on Akane.  "He 
didn't
know."

"That's what Nabiki thinks.  And it makes sense to me."

"Hell yes, it does."  Ranma was quivering slightly.  "It explains
everything.  Everything.  Oh my."

Yyyyyyeah, I think this is where he feels the bottom fall out and all those 
"Oh my" start making way for "Oh, fuck" and even fancier profanity :P

Ranma didn't seem to know what to say.  Ashen, he said, "Akane, I'm 
sorry."

It helped to hear him say that.  And hurt.  "Thank you, Ranma.  Right now,
let's figure out what to tell our parents."

The wince that crossed Ranma's face was a clear indication that he hadn't
thought about that at all.  "Okay.  Thanks."

It's been two minutes since he made the connection, so I think it's a 
natural assumption that he hadn't even begun to consider that issue.

From her newfound wellspring of serenity, Akane began a calm discussion 
with
Ranma about a future that did not involve her.  Idly, she wondered when 
and
if she would find the time and place to scream again.

Aww ;_;

Feeling a little surreal, Ranma picked up the pen and signed his name. 
For
the last time.  He shook his head, then handed the contract to Nabiki. 
She
studied his signature,

Nabiki: No, Ranma, I don't think you can sign with an "X."

"Thank you."  Ranma bowed from where he was sitting.  Then he turned and
bowed to his parents, a bit more deeply than he had to Soun.  "Thank you 
for
allowing this.  I hope you guys know... I mean, you're my parents no 
matter
what, that always come first."

"I know, Son."  Mother smiled.  "But thank you.  You have restored honor
that had all but vanished from our line."

Ouch. That speaks volumes over how much she values honor over her own family 
name.

"So, Ranma-kun," Kasumi said from where she sat next to Soun, "will we be
seeing more of Kentaro-san now?"

It surprised me a bit that she didn't use his last name. I know she'd be 
affable and familiar towards him, but somehow I think she'd use 
"Marumoto-san" when speaking about him to other people.

"He doesn't have to change his name, you know."  Akane's voice was 
extremely
deferential but with a touch of defiance.  "No matter who he ends up 
married
to, his name can remain the same.  He will always be a part of this 
family."

Mom shifted her steely gaze to Akane and Ranma rushed to regain its focus.

Er? He rushed to regain the focus of Nodoka's gaze? Or did you mean "regain 
his focus"?

Ranma's mother snapped her mouth closed.  "You cannot condone this,
husband."

"I do not.  But neither do I condone my offspring being forced to give up
true love to marry someone else out of a misplaced sense of honor. 
Because
that will surely lead to a life of misery."

Aaaand here's Genma, scoring one absurdly painful, critical hit... >_<

He made his way across the yard.  He stopped outside the dojo - his dojo -
and decided that he wasn't quite ready.  Instead he stepped over to the 
pond
and sat on a rock on the edge, looking intently at the fish swimming 
inside.

"Thinking of taking a dip?"

Ranma: Nah, someone replaced the koi with piranha. Think your dad is trying 
to tell us something?

Akane settled herself on a nearby rock.  "It's been so long.  It would be
good to see you as a woman again."

"Oh?  Really?"

"Yes."  Akane looked down into the pool herself.  "The woman I saw at her
graduation - she was confident, excited, and mature in a way I had never
seen before.  Since you got cured, I haven't seen her again.  The closest 
is
when you were packing, getting ready to see Kentaro again.  Your eyes 
shone.
I, I hadn't seen you like that since before Herb."

Ooh, that's a _very_ nice parallel. I remember that scene, which had pretty 
much that same description. Of course, there's also all the meaning implied 
in the difference between packing to go hunt Herb, and packing to go hunt 
Kentaro.

Ranma thought that over.  "No, keep talking.  By myself I tend to go 
around
in circles.  It's been too long, and now I feel so close.  I can finally
make a decision now that the ancillary issues have been taken care of."

"Ancillary."  Akane smiled.  "College sure has changed you.  I can't 
imagine
you using words like that during high school."

Yeah, he also learned a whole bunch of new words when dealing with the guys 
that kept ogling, but he can't use those in friendly conversation.

Ranma chuckled.  "Maybe.  I don't use 'em a lot, I sometimes get annoyed
when Kentaro talks too fancy.  But sometimes it's nice to know words that
describe things good."

"Describe things good?"  Akane laughed.  "You did that on purpose, didn't
you?"

"Maybe."  Ranma grinned.

"Me Ranma. Me grunt but good."

"So, underneath all the college courses, you're still the same Ranma."
Akane shrugged.  "Maybe there's an analogy there.  No matter what's been
done to you, you're still Ranma."

I dunno, I'd say that the whole fic is precisely about defining who "Ranma" 
is, and how Ranma deals with that knowledge.

"It's not that simple, though."  Ranma idly trailed his hand in the pond.

Then a koi came up and bit it. Hard.

Akane nodded.  "All right.  So, let's narrow the focus a bit.  Why would 
you
choose to become female all the time?  Would it only be because of 
Kentaro?"

"Yes!"  Ranma paused, frowned at himself, then repeated, "Yes.  There were
things I liked about being female

He felt pretty, so pretty and witty and wise!

...OK, I'll shut up now :P

but really, almost all the time it was a
struggle.  Sometimes I wanted to scream and attack everyone nearby."

"We all feel that way sometimes."  Akane smiled.

Ranma: (eyeing Akane incredulously) _Only_ sometimes? You?

"I think it's entirely the point."  Akane grabbed his shoulders, staring 
at
him intensely.  "You think that a female Ranma would be a weaker Ranma.
That's the fear that's lurking in the bottom of your panda-trained brain.
What I want you to understand - really, really understand - is that no
matter what gender you are, you're still Ranma.  If it helps, think of 
your
female self as a combination of me, Nabiki, and Kasumi."  Akane paused.
"Okay, maybe not Kasumi so much.

Akane: Substitute her for Shampoo.

(This whole exchange is exceedingly well done, by the way. I'm snipping most 
of it because I can't find anything to object to, except to say that I 
really, really like it.)

"Dammit," Ranma murmured.  "I do l-love him."

Akane ground bones together in his hands.  "Not good enough.  Try again."

"I..."  Ranma stopped, gathered himself, let it lose.  "I love him."

"Better."  She relaxed her grip marginally and shifted her stance.  "Now, 
do
you think you could stand be female again?"

"Yes."  The answer was natural, easy, almost an afterthought.

"Good.  Let's start now."

Heh! Saw her coming a mile away. And Ranma did too. ;)

Akane pulled on his arms, using the leverage she had established.  Ranma,
however, had deduced what the shifting of her stance had meant, and added
his own energy to the throw.  He flipped completely over Akane, grabbed 
her
forearms, and hauled her into the pond.  She landed with a shriek and a
splash, which Ranma managed to avoid.

Akane surfaced, spluttering.  "Damn you!"

Ranma laughed.  "C'mon, you gotta do better than that.  My students could
have set up a better throw."

Two things. Okay, three. First: Bwahahahaha. Second, I found it immensely 
fitting that she would be the one to get tossed into the pond, seeing how 
she never fell in during the whole manga, yet Ranma got tossed into it 
dozens of times. Third, I also noticed a parallel with a scene shortly after 
Akane got her hair cut --after she has her own little catharsis about Doc 
Tofu, she tips Ranma off the fence and into the canal, and they both have 
the nearly the same responses (though switched, of course.) I don't know if 
you intended this particular reversal, seeing how it came about after 
Ranma's own resolution, but it works beautifully.

Ranma woke.  Carefully and deliberately, because she was certain what she
was going to find and she wanted to be prepared for it.

However, nothing could have prepared her for the sight of a busty, tall and 
barely-dressed sorceress who kept calling her "Lina."

[Ranma waking up, taking stock, and going about picking up clothes]

Hmm. She's being very natural, maybe even casual about all this. To be 
frank, I expected a bit of introspection from her regarding what she has 
just been through. Now, I know you might not want to intrude into Technical 
Virginity's handling of those issues, but that was the "then" and this is 
the "after." She has just been through a monumental breakthrough: she 
rekindled the relationship and went as far as consummating it, all in the 
course of a day, just after a month of thinking it dead or unsalvageable. 
Then, also, is her own personal release. All thoughts had during the heat of 
the moment, so to speak, are well behind. So how about the "now"? Does she 
have any particular feelings about it, does she have a new insight on her 
situation? Any thoughts back to her days during "Time Never Did....", which 
were a stark contrast to what she just allowed to happen (and indeed, wanted 
to happen)?

A definitely domestic thought.  Ranma found herself staring around the
closet for a long moment.  Making these kind of long-term decisions was
frightening and exciting.  Disturbing and exhilarating.  She wished she
could settle on one emotion but her subconscious stubbornly refused.

Welcome to a grown-up relationship, Ranma :P

Ranma turned back to her duffle bag and pulled out the few toiletries 
she'd
brought along.  Hopefully Kentaro had some of the basics already, like 
soap
and shampoo.

Aiya!

Smiling, Ranma padded over to the bathroom.  She wanted to get an early
start - it was a long train ride back to the Tendo home,

(I suppose this is the morning after, right?)

She found herself standing in the middle of the bathroom musing, and 
forced
herself to focus on the details.  Kentaro had a small but adequate tub,
although Ranma decided she couldn't afford the luxury of a bath this
morning.  There was a shower area with a stool, and Ranma was pleased to
note that there was both soap and shampoo.

o_O For a medicine student on a budget, like he implied in TNL, Kentaro's 
apartment is more than just "fairly decent."

"I know."  Kentaro, Ranma was amused to notice, was keeping his eyes 
rigidly
locked on Ranma's face.  "It's just... well..."

"Enough."  Ranma smiled wickedly.  "Come here and give me a hug."

Heh!

"Which way?"  Kentaro sounded relieved and amused.  "Two naked men 
touching
each other?"

"Yeah."  Ranma snatched his hand away, suppressing a shudder.

Kentaro chuckled.  "All right.  I have to admit, I'm not eager to repeat
that experience."

"Good."

Ironic, because that's almost exactly what Ranma had to adapt to :P

But it still did bother her a little.  The train arrived and Ranma waited
until the man, with great reluctance, entered a car, then she got into a
different car.  She found a seat and sighed heavily.  No matter how much 
she
tried to work things out there would always be things she still needed to
deal with, externally and internally.  Ranma spent a few minutes in deep
melancholy, wondering when if ever she would find a safe and contented 
point
in her life.

It's not a matter of finding one, but building one. And that always takes 
more than one.

Ranma looked inside her backpack for things to do.  All it contained was 
her
wallet and the train schedule.  Not even a notebook.  Now that she was no
longer in college, the number of things she carried around had dropped
significantly.

She no longer carried the paddle and taser she used for hazing new pledges, 
for starters.

She pulled open the gate and ran into the house.  Ranma kicked off her 
shoes
and walked quickly down the hallway towards the phone, looking for Nabiki.

She skidded to a half halfway down.

"skidded to a half"->"skidded to a stop"

Her mother had heard her enter and was
looking into the hallway from the kitchen.  Her expression was closed, a
good impression of the old man, actually.  Ranma suddenly felt embarrassed
and guilty, her female form suddenly feeling wrong.  Swallowing, Ranma
forced out an unsteady, "Hello, Mother."

Choosing to be a woman was bad enough, but she just had sex out of wedlock. 
Mothers never like that. :P

(Unless it had been male Ranma, I suppose. Then it's possible she would've 
been thrilled.)

The words fell flat, the sound of water splashing filling the air.  Mother
sighed and uncupped her hands, the water in them draining away.  "All 
right,
Son.  I see that I will not be able to change your mind.  I hope you
understand the consequences."

Ranma cringed inwardly.  "I... uh, tell me."

"That, I think, is something you will have to figure out for yourself.  In 
a
way, I pray you never do."  Mother left the rest of the dishes in the sink
and began walking out of the kitchen.

I wonder if this very conversation came back to haunt them during 
"Serendipity."

The train pulling up to the station was a mild surprise.  Ranma glanced
around, making certain that this was indeed her stop.  She glanced down at
her newly-purchased notebook which contained the vaguest outlines of 
lesson
plans.  It was almost against her nature to plan things in such details -
Ranma specialized in making up lessons on the spot -

"OK, class, today we're learning how to defend ourselves from a hive of 
several hundred angry bees! It'll help you get faster, I promise!"

"Choice."  Kentaro sighed.  "That's what this whole thing has been about
from the first day I met you.  About letting you choose."

"Well, yeah."  Ranma walked over to the bed, searching herself for signs 
of
trepidation and, thankfully, not finding any.  "Another way to put it is
that this has been all about dealing with the choices that were forced 
upon
me."

Oh, ha-ha. Touch�.

"I don't know.  I really don't want to think about it, I'm too exhausted.
Right now I just want to relax."

"All right.  You know I'm here if you ever need to talk about it."  He
reached up one hand and turned off the lamp, plunging the room into a 
gloom
that was lit only by the lights of the city streaming through the window.

Ooh. Nice atmosphere.

"God, Ranma, no."  He moved one hand until it was lightly stroking her 
hair.
"I love you.  A lot.  A frightening amount, actually.  If you must know, 
the
worst problem I still am dealing with is the fear that I'll never be what
you need.  I know the struggles you go through just to be with me.  I live
every day deathly afraid that I'll say or do one wrong thing and you'll be
forever lost to me."

"Dammit, Kentaro-"  Ranma cut herself short, remembering the teasing test
she had given him in the bathroom this morning.  Maybe he had some basis 
for
this particular fear.  "Listen, think of it this way.  I have gone to hell
and back to be with you.  I'm not about to toss you aside over some little
thing.  I wouldn't have bothered if you'd meant that little to me."

Ah, here it is. Back when I commented on the revised TNL and Brave Bearing, 
I mentioned that I found this kind of conflict much more powerful and 
emotionally engaging than an actual combat (in an action series, of course) 
of equivalent magnitude, and this is precisely why. In my own fics, I tend 
to have the characters literally battle through hell to be with each other, 
but, to be honest, I find that I much prefer situations like this where they 
struggle with each other, and with their own personalities and 
idiosyncrasies, in order to attain their goals. Not that I've grown tired of 
the other kind --there's always a place for the romance epic, of course--  
but interpersonal clashes tend to develop the characters much more, giving 
them such a human and fallible quality that it's impossible not to feel 
sympathy for them. And, to cut straight to the point, that's exactly my 
absolute favorite aspect of the whole TOP saga: seeing the characters fight 
not an external opponent that can be easily personified, but themselves, 
their own vague insecurities and prejudices and perceptions, and come out 
all the wiser and stronger from it.

That said, all debate about whether manga-Ranma could actually go through 
this and whether it would be OOC or not, Ranma and Kentaro are one of the 
best couples I've read about in fanfiction, and probably beyond it. Without 
considerations of whether or not Ranma fits the reader's view of the 
Takahashi character, it's the evolution those two go through that makes them 
such a compelling read.

"I know.  Intellectually, I know.  But I don't quite feel that yet. 
That's
why I was waiting up for you.  For a while, I just need to be with you as
much as possible."

"I... feel the same." Ranma swallowed as raw emotion washed over her.  "I
need this, too.  Just us, together."

And here's the proof of what I just said up there. :)

Akane stared out the window of her old bedroom.

"Hmm, I wonder what Ranma was up to yesterday, after I left him at Kentaro's 
place..."

A movement caught her eye.  A woman was moving towards the pond.  She
stopped at the edge, looking down at it.

On an impulse, Akane left her room and walked downstairs and outside.  She
walked up next to the figure,

...and pushed her right in.

The water was as dark as the night.

Well, of course it is. That's the point.

Again, another excellent exchange between Akane and Nodoka. Brings out a 
characterization that bridges TNL and Serendipity (and, to some extent, 
Painted Smile and Definitions of Hell) very nicely. I still wish we could 
see her finally being happy, though, but that would only happen in the 
chronological future of the series.

Nodoka sat quickly and easily on her haunches, bringing herself closer to
the water.  "If I were to fall in, would I change?"

"Change?"  Akane smiled slightly.  "Not unless you've visited Jusenkyo."

"Perhaps I should go visit," Nodoka said softly.  "Perhaps then I could
change someone who would not feel so... unsettled by the choices her child
has made."

If it took Ranma years to grow to accept his, or rather, her own condition, 
maybe Nodoka could try the same --even if it takes place long after Kyoko's 
birth, at a point where she doesn't have to force herself to think of Ranma 
as a daughter in order to accept her.

Nodoka trailed her hand in the water,

And then the koi bit her too.

...or maybe not. Time will tell.

Akane looked back down at the pool.  If only.  Those two words had defined
her world recently as well.  But she could have a future that went beyond
that if she could only follow the advice she'd just given to a woman 
twenty
years her senior.

Just fall in and change.

Grinning, Akane pinched her nose shut, closed her eyes, and jumped, 
waiting
for the change.

Excellent ending, and a nice way to bookend the installment, like I said way 
up there. It also completes the symbolism inherent in the koi pond, because 
now it's unknown and hidden in darkness, just like Akane's future --but in a 
good way, one that might possibly lead to a bright outcome.

And I must insist. I was very, very excited to hear that you were finishing 
up this story when I commented on TNL, and it was an amazing coincidence 
that I was suggesting that same thing, but if I were given another chance 
I'd immediately ask for just one more piece, one where the point of view 
fell on the Saotomes themselves. TOP and TNL were all Kentaro, while TNDA, 
Those Tears, Serendipity, Painted Smile and Definitions were Ranma's. This 
one brought Akane into the fold, giving us a brief insight as to her own 
thoughts, which leaves Nodoka and her fragmented marriage to Genma as the 
final piece of the puzzle. We're fairly familiar now with Ranma and Kentaro, 
and what the future holds for them, but it still pains me to think of the 
Saotomes and what _they_ went through, especially since they have very 
little reward, if any, for all their suffering.

It's entirely up to you, of course --even a brief "this is what happens to 
them" in a postscript or a reply would suffice-- but for me, at least, it 
means that I really enjoy your writing and would like to read more of it. On 
the other hand, all good things come to an end and all that, so I'll be 
perfectly happy if you choose to close the chapter on Thy Outward Part and 
move on to other things. :)

In any case, thanks for the story, it was yet another great read.


Jorge A. Pratt
jorgepratt@prodigy.net.mx
terbril@rocketmail.com

             .---Anime/Manga Fanfiction Mailing List----.
             | Administrators - ffml-admins@anifics.com |
             | Unsubscribing - ffml-request@anifics.com |
             |     Put 'unsubscribe' in the subject     |
             `---- http://ffml.anifics.com/faq.txt -----'