-----Original Message-----
From: ffml-bounce@anifics.com [mailto:ffml-bounce@anifics.com] On Behalf
Of the DragonBard
Sent: Monday, July 03, 2006 8:26 AM
To: ffml@anifics.com
Subject: [FFML] [fanfic][HP]Harry Potter, the Arch-Magus Chapter 2


Harry Potter, the Arch-Magus

Mmm.. I liked both this and the previous chapter. Word of advice though is
to proofread for names - it's "Dursley", and not any of the various
transpositions you managed in the prologue and chapter one...

Got a laugh out of Harry *not* being able to order truly magical clothing -
it's become rather tedious to read various other efforts that go into great
detail about the spells Harry orders on his new clothes when he defies
Dumbledore and goes shopping on his own in Diagon Alley after OOTP. 

The Flame and Void, which you mention in the first chapter, is apparently a
real meditation technique, in addition to being the preferred way of getting
into the right state of mind to harness the male half of the One Power
(which I honestly hope you'll not mix into this fic, since gender-separated
magical powers have *no* precedent in the HP-verse). Reading the
descriptions used in various places in the Wheel of Time makes me think that
it is very likely an effective method of Occlumency - but I think you've
likely come up with that yourself or you wouldn't have used it. 

Other techniques from your sources that could work as methods of Occlumency
would be the mental shields that the Belgariad crew use to hide from the
Grolim mind searches in Magician's Gambit and Castle of Wizardry, as well as
one or two places in the Malloreon.

I know a lot of people like grafting ritual magic of some kinds into the
HP-verse for various nefarious reasons - have you thought about
medium-length spells (not power-word style incantations such as in HP, nor
chant-for-hours rituals, but moderate length verse spells like in the
Elenium/Tamuli and Slayers? One pretty major problem with them is that HP
spells are all instant cast - standing still for a thirty-second chant is
pretty stupid unless casting by surprise, or from outside of the targets own
casting range... only good for serious long-range firepower or non-combat
spells, in other words. (if Harry will eventually learn to replicate stuff
like that in an instant manner... brrr.)

Assuming Harry can learn to replicate at least the simpler effects from any
of his source materials, even without having access to the specific magical
system that produced them in their source material, he'd be a nightmare to
face on the battlefields. The Wheel of Time, even if it has some funky
gender issues, has a lot of cool and probably easy-to-replicate ideas for
turning the forces of nature on their ear. Rand and Taim are pretty
inventive with simple stuff, like the headbursting thing, or the falling
sparks that went through several floors and anything between them. (and some
of the more complex things that LTT inspires is on par with Lina's bouts of
casual mass destruction - like the pacman imitation from the latest book,
and the thunderstorms he conjured in the Stone and in Altara...)

SP



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