Subject: [FFML] Re: [Fanfic][Naruto] Suiren, Chapter 4: Shadows...
From: "The Eternal Lost Lurker" <lurkerdrome@sbcglobal.net>
Date: 6/30/2006, 7:26 AM
To: "Eimii" <eimii@bresnan.net>, <ffml@anifics.com>



SHADOWS...

*whacks them with the Keyblade*

This one would be like all of the others, with Mitarashi Anko or some
other unspeakable horror lurking behind it, ready to set her heart
hammering anew as they continued the twisted game of cat and mouse
they'd been playing since Sakura had woken hours earlier, naked and
alone in an empty room somewhere deep within the bowels of ANBU's
torture and interrogation facility.

Naked and alone is good. Bowels and torture, not so good.

Unfortunately, Anko wasn't giving her a lot of options. Sitting still
was probably about as effective as moving, but she wasn't the _only_
thing loose down here, it seemed. *Ugh- it's a good thing they had
eyes,* the pink haired girl mused with a shudder, rubbing the very
real-looking sucker marks on her arm.

"The better to see you with while we're tentacle-raping you, my dear!"

*This sucks!

*groan*

She would just have to confront the demon, then... but how? She wasn't a
genius ninja; she was barely even mediocre. She didn't have any special
techniques, and she had to assume that Anko controlled the environment
completely, so elaborate traps would be useless. It always came back to
control- Anko had her hooks in Sakura's mind, and Sakura wasn't good
enough to dig them out. *Maybe a counterattack of some sort- but she's a
_jounin_! I wouldn't even know where to start!*

Start by going down on her. She won't be expecting THAT.

*...It had better be.* An electric thrill surged from the base of her
spine to the top of her head; she was going to do it! It felt good to
finally have a plan, even if it was a crazy, doomed plan. Almost
absently, her hands began working as her gaze grew distant- looking
inward, as she felt out which seals opened the right chakra pathways.

Make the wrong seal, get eaten by a spirit grue.

"To hell with it! I've had enough!" Shoving doubt and worry for her
mortal soul aside, the young genin stepped away from the wall and took a
bold stance in front of the door. Anko was probably waiting for her
behind it; the sadistic bitch hadn't shown her face in a while. Sakura
was almost starting to forget how humiliating it was, having that
woman's mocking laugher chasing after her as she ran away. *Enough
running; from now on, the only people who see my back are those I've
sworn to protect, as a ninja.*

And those who take her from behind, as a sex toy.

"I was wondering when you'd join me; I'm afraid we've had to start
without you," the monster woman drawled, oozing sick sensuality with
every word. She glanced lazily down at the rat. "Don't worry, though,
it'll take more than this to spoil my appetite... but perhaps _you_ can
satisfy me." Anko's grin was all fangs, pearly white stained with red.

Scary! o.o;;

The confusion on Anko's face was more than ample reward as Sakura's
emerald gaze burned into her with defiance and victory. "I never count
on guts or luck for anything. They're nothing if you don't have a plan."
With that, she craned her neck forward and locked lips with the
surprised examiner, then flinched hard and bit the tip of her tongue as
her soul exploded.

SCORE!!

*I just kissed a woman who was eating a rat.*

That's not as disgusting as the things Ino has in her mouth when you kiss
*her*, Sakura-chan...

The one part of the Shintenshin that had given Sakura the most headaches
over the last three weeks was how the mind was projected out of the
body. She just couldn't figure out how so much information could be
moved around safely without some sort of conduit. This meant that, for
the improvised version that she'd kludged together, she had to actually
_touch_ Anko for it to work. Contact between parts that had a major
concentration of chakra gates seemed like her best shot; hands, mouths
or... elsewhere.

Awww, should've been the 'elsewhere'. XD

That it had hurt at all was definitely a bad sign; she'd probably done
serious injury to herself, but that was too big to take in at the
moment. Instead, she concentrated on the metallic tang of blood in her
mouth. *...she was eating a _rat._*

GET OFF THE DAMN RAT ALREADY, PINKY!

When Sakura's gaze finally returned to the examiner, Anko had looked up,
and was now staring at her in confusion. Setting her jaw, Sakura glared
right back and rolled into a low crouch, preparing to defend herself.
She'd made her bed so she'd better be ready to sleep in it, even if
there was still a snake in the sheets.

Man, every fic that sticks Sakura with Anko involves snakes in the bedding.

"What the hell did I ever do to you to deserve this!" Sakura roared,
nerves and weariness finally getting the better of her.

The examiner's good mood seemed to evaporate instantly, and after
simmering for all of two seconds she was as red in the face as Sakura.
"What did ya do ta me?! Ya tried ta (&$in' _kill_ me for trippin' over
yer fat ass and knockin' ya inta the mud, and _then_ ya locked me in yer
private sicko fantasy land for four hours just so ya could $%#(& with my
head until I went as nuts as you!" Anko declared, stabbing an accusing
finger at the pink-haired kunoichi. "And lemmie tell ya, that is
seriously (%)&$in' nuts! I mean, what the hell was with the (#$&in'
bagpipes in the room with the giant pudding thing that tried ta eat
me!?"

...oooooooh shit, Inner Sakura's OUT. @_@ *RUNS FOR THE HILLS*

The tall woman shot an indignant look at her, accompanied an obscene
gesture. "Damn straight I'm not (#&$in' Mitarashi Anko!"

"Then who the hell are you?!"

"Who else could I possibly (%&)$in' be?! I'm Haruno Sakura!"

And we have EVIL TWIN SIGN. XD

The brunette glared at her suspiciously. "Look, there's only two !(#$in'
people here, so one of us's gotta be Anko, and the other's gotta be
Sakura," Anko pointed out, starting to sound a little exasperated.

Not necessarily. ^_^

"What color underwear were ya wearing the
first time you saw Sasuke?"

Sakura thought for a moment, then frowned. "That's a trick question."

"And why's that?"

"Because I wasn't wearing any underwear."

H_H;;;

In response, Anko plopped back down on the floor, propping her elbow on
her knee and her chin in her hand. "Hell no! I mean, where the #()$&
does this leave _us_ then?" Though frustrated and confused, the older
woman sounded relieved to be allowed to swear again, now that she'd
proven her claim on her identity. "We can't _both_ be Sakura."

Well neither of you is Ino...

Despite herself, the petal-tressed girl had to break a weak smile. "And
is this anything like what we had planned?"

"We're completely in control, ain't we?"

Can't fault logic like *that*...

"Well, you do seem a bit... excitable."

"I'm havin' a (%!&in' mental breakdown here!" the brunette snapped
defensively. "_Excuse me_ if I'm a little on edge!"

XD

Their eyes traveled downward simultaneously. "...$#(&in' snake woman,"
the dark-haired Sakura commented in annoyance. "Should'a guessed that
first."

XD~

"Heh, don't worry about it!" she scoffed brashly, which of course only
served to make Sakura worry even more. "Just leave everythin' ta me!"

Oh hell. XD

*Wait, no- she ain't 'Kurenai-sensei!' $&%(, what would Anko call her?!*
Blazing through her vast store of local and tactical knowledge, Sakura
instantly determined that there were so few female Jounin in Konoha that
they probably all knew each other at least in passing. She also realized
that it was getting close to noon, Kurenai was most likely looking for
her, and Anko wasn't one to stand by formalities. Taking all these
things into account, she reached deep into whatever store of acting
talent she had hidden in her and blurted out the first thing that came
to mind.

"Yuuhiii! Feed me!" the wild-haired brunette cried, a manic grin
breaking across her beaming face.

*dies laughing*

Chuckling for reasons that only she could know, 'Anko' waved
dismissively. "Just another stupid kid..." She'd have wished the other
Sakura luck, but she suspected she needed it more herself. Impersonating
Anko was turning out to be surprisingly easy, but despite her success
thus far she doubted she could fool the Jounin for much longer.
Strangely, though, she wasn't all that worried. *Ah, ta hell with it. At
least I get a free lunch...*

Heheheh.

*Well, that was quick. No point in pretending now...* Still, Sakura
began by cautiously cracking an eyelid and peering to the side. She was
greeted by the sight of a masked ANBU ninja straddling a backwards chair
and leaning forward with his arms on the back rest, staring right at
her.

"Flippin' pervert..."

Sakura decided to forego the jumpsuit, since she wore her regular
running shorts and a black mesh half-shirt underneath it anyhow, just in
case she ever had to ditch her training uniform quickly. For instance,
if she ever saw Ino coming, she'd be out of that thing so fast that Gai
probably wouldn't even notice until minutes later.

For multiple reasons.

"...nice to see you're not taking this badly," her guard replied drolly,
though he didn't step out of the doorway. "Do you understand what you
did wrong?"

"I pissed off Mitarashi Anko?"

That's about the size of it.

He brought a clipboard over to her a moment later, and the pink-haired
kunoichi found herself scanning through a pile of non-disclosure and
release of liability agreements that she was apparently supposed to
sign, in triplicate. *I suppose mistakenly torturing your own village's
citizens isn't something they take lightly in ANBU. Hmm... I wonder if I
could sue...*

"LAWSUIT NO JUTSU!"

"Ah- ...thanks." Examining the mask more closely, Sakura noted that it
was rather different from the one she'd had before. Firstly, it seemed
to be a genuine _hunter nin_ mask, white with red accents and complete
with the Konoha leaf upon the forehead to indicate the village she
hailed from. It was also a different shape from the bird mask Anko had
broken. It was a fox mask instead, with abstract curves indicating a
snout and ears, and sharply tilted eye slits.

How fitting!

"Well," he began with a sheepish shrug, "If you're going to go around
wearing a mask, I figure a little warning might be in order, just so we
know what to expect in case we have to pick you up again."

Heh!

*I AM NOT A TROUBLEMAKER, DAMMIT!* Sakura could _tell_ the man was
grinning like an idiot behind that monkey-mask he was wearing. Gods- she
could just see this spreading around the village like wildfire. She'd
have a rep as bad as Naruto's before she knew it.

Worse. Naruto never got picked up by ANBU.

...well, okay, the whole "demon that raped the village" stigma might trump
an embarassing ANBU run-in, but...

"Shikamaru, what are you doing here?" Flipping the mask back onto the
top of her head, Sakura peered at the boy inquisitively.

The Nara Clan heir simply shrugged, quickly getting over the absurdity
of Haruno Sakura coming out of an ANBU haunt wearing a hunter nin mask.
"Ino asked me to help her find out where you were, to see if you were
okay."

Awww.

*But Ino-pig would probably have gotten caught in front of the butcher
shop,*

*snrk*

"Oh?" A glance at the road, which in this part of town was little more
than a wide strip of mud, churned by the rain and thousands of walking
feet, caused Sakura's thin pink brows to rise on her pleasantly wide
forehead. *What the hell kind of trail could he have possibly followed
through _that_? This isn't Kiba and Akamaru we're talking about here.*
The image of lazy, cantankerous Shikamaru, snorting along with his face
buried in the mud, made Sakura chuckle in amusement.

*SNRK*

At least she didn't think she had to worry about Shikamaru too much.

*ominous drama*

Ino bristled. "What- you let her leave?! Why didn't you tell her to
wait?" His customary 'it was too much trouble' shrug predictably caused
the blonde to shift into High Annoyance Mode. "That crazy forehead girl
_will_ apologize to my face for ruining my morning!" she ranted, looking
a bit more irritated and less worried than she had earlier. "Which way
did she go?"

Oh dear.

Of course this probably was furthest from the case, she told herself,
but it was still quite shocking to see the two jounin chatting like old
friends, as if nothing at all was amiss. Had the jutsu ended? Was
Mitarashi Anko back- and if so, what had happened to the other 'her?'
She was suddenly glad for the mask, and what little anonymity it offered
her, given that she was one of only two people she'd ever met with hair
the color of cherry blossoms, the other being her grandmother.

"I bet Utena-baachan never got into a mess like THIS, though..."

Seeing that she wasn't getting point across, Sakura growled, screwing
Anko's face into a scowl of frustration. "I mean that literally! I mean
I'm losin' _me_! I also thought it was too #)(&$in' good ta be true, how
easy it was ta 'pretend' ta be Anko an' fool 'er, and it _is_. She's
leakin' out!"

*mentally pictures Liquid Anko oozing out of Inner Sakura's ears*

Looking lower, she finally found a pair of smooth lips, parted slightly
in a gasp of surprise. *Here goes nothin'!* Putting her other hand on
the shorter girl's cheek to steady her, Sakura whispered a hasty prayer
to her ancestors and dove in, trying with all her might to pour her very
soul into the stunned kunoichi in her arms.

Oh damn, here we go again. XD

Instinct took hold where reason failed, and she realized that the
Jounin's eyes, pointed straight at her, were glazed, but beginning to
focus again. Speed and stealth were her allies as both ninja and prey,
and without even thinking she embraced both, vanishing from sight as she
rocketed toward the sky on legs propelled by frantic might.

And away we go!

"Huh?" Blinking, the short-haired brunette straightened and turned
around to see Yuuhi Kurenai standing in the restaurant's back door. Her
friend of several years was only partially successful in hiding the
shocked look on her face, covering it half-heartedly with a mysterious
smile.

I'm guessing she only got there as soon as the 'passionate kiss' part.

Eyes automatically drifting down to the object in her hands, Anko stared
at it uncomprehendingly for a few seconds, then realization dawned.
"AAAAAH? YUUUHIII! I can't afford this!" she screeched, holding the
tablet at arm's length, like the numbers might get smaller if they were
farther away.

Sadly, that never quite works.

"...fine, If that's the way you're going to be, then I won't ask,"
Kurenai muttered with a disappointed sniff.

Aww. Juicy gossip denied. Heehee.

"But Yuuhiii, I'll starve!" Anko protested, hurrying after the other
woman as she disappeared back inside.

"Hmph, a bit less dango and sweets every day would be good for you..."

"That's not fair!"

Heheheheh.

"Shikamaru," Ino prompted, gross disbelief making her voice faint and
airy, "after Mitarashi-san kissed her, how did Sakura look to you?"

"Troublesome."

"She looked... relieved, to me- happy, almost," the blonde girl finally
declared, shaking her head. *Who would have thought that- that
_Sakura_... no _wonder_ she hasn't made any progress with Sasuke...*

No, that'd be because he's an emofag.

Frowning, Ino bit her lower lip and began walking, not really caring
where her legs took her. "What's going on with you, Sakura...?"

Very Strange Things.

To be continued...

And we'll be here waiting!

================================
Dude, stop wailing on my junk!
              ~~*~~
The Eternal Lost Lurker
www.lurkerdrome.com



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