Heh, this must be a sign or something.  I just
finished watching what episodes I have of bleach and
was thinking of a possible Ranma/Bleach crossover when
this pops up.  

You really should format your fic better, so it won't
look so...awkward.

Onwards to the C&C

--- Peter Gallagher <ellfangor8@gmail.com> wrote:

***************************
Reaping the Souls of the Cursed

By: Ellf

Prologue: Introspective

***************************

Disclaimer:  If I owned either Ranma or Bleach, why
would I be writing this?

I would say....no? :D

Soul Society's morning air was crisp, clean and full
of anticipation.  The
Captains and Vice-Captains of the Gotei were all
gathered around the Court
of Pure Souls Central office.  A judgment was about

Should office be Office?

to be released.



"Vice-Captain Shihouin Ranma, step forward."  The

Comma after forward

voice of the head of
Central rang out.  The Shinigami in question walked
up from his standing

Do you mean 'from where he was standing'?

next to the Captain-Commander, Yamamoto Genryuusai
Shigekuni.  Dressed like
a typical Shinigami, Ranma had his hair tied up in a
pigtail that went down
to the center of his back, and his Zanpakutoh sits

Zanpakutoh securely fastened or sat 

in a sheath at his side.
"Vice-Captain, your judgment for your crime has been
decided.  Though this
crime in of itself did not harm Soul Society for the

Delete 'in of'

time being, it had the

it has the

potential to do great harm to the balance between
the worlds."

the two worlds."

Bowing his head, Ranma replied, "I understand,
Director."



They weren't finished yet.  "Shihouin Ranma, you

Add 'However they..'

have been judged guilty and
will now be sentenced.  For your past usefulness, we

Try replacing usefulness with service, maybe dedicated
service

will not give you the
Death Sentence; instead we shall send you to Earth
for an indeterminate
amount of time.  Eventually you may be allowed back

Comma after Eventually

into Seireitei, but for
now, you will be on Earth."



Ranma did not look surprised at his sentence and
bowed his head.
"Understood."



"Feel free to do your normal Shinigami duties while
on Earth, but you will
be limited just as all Vice-Captains and Captains
are.  Your escort to earth
will be Aizen Sousuke, after which he will take away
your Hell Butterfly to
prevent you from getting back here."



Captain Aizen walked up to stand next to Ranma. 
"Well, Vice-Captain, shall
we go?"



Nodding Ranma opened the portal to Earth, and

Comma after Nodding.  And maybe Aizen should be the
one to open the portal.

stepped through, followed
shortly by Captain Aizen.

**************************************************************

The portal opened up in a city and out stepped the
two Shinigami, Captain
Aizen and Ranma.  The buildings here were taller

Just say 'and out stepped the two of them'. We already
know who they are.

than in Soul Society, and
unlike in Seireitei it was night here.

night time

"Where are we, Captain Aizen?" Ranma looked at the
glasses-wearing Captain.

eye-glass wearing or spectacles wearing

"Earth, of course.  More specifically, we're in
Tokyo, the Karakura

Japan, Tokyo, 

Townarea to be precise. And this is where I leave
you."
Aizen snatched something that was floating around
Ranma.  "You can't have
this with you, now can you?  Your Hell Butterfly
would be awkward to leave
with you.  After all, we can't have you returning to
Soul Society."



Ranma turned and faced the city from the rooftop
they were standing on.  It
seemed oddly appropriate that here was where he
would face his sentence.  After
what he had gone through, he had hoped for the death
penalty.  It seemed
that someone up there hated him.  Captain Aizen
turned around and began to
walk through the portal, saying something before he
left.  "You, of all my
experiments, had the most success; it's a pity you
won't be there for the
destruction of Soul Society."  The portal closed
behind him, leaving Ranma
there on the rooftop to contemplate in silence.



The destruction of Soul Society?  Was that what
Aizen was after? Why hadn't
he seen it before?   Ranma thought of Soul Society,
and how he could
possibly get back to stop Aizen. There was nothing
he could do in this
situation; Aizen had made sure of that.  His oh so
heinous crime that he had
committed was slightly the fault of Aizen, only
because he made an idle
suggestion.  No.  He would take responsibility for
his actions.  He had gone
into Hueco Mundo knowing full well what would
happen.  It was only luck that
he had managed to prevent that Menos from escaping
into Soul Society.  He
had to use Hoshimaru's Bankai in order to do it too.
 He deserved his
punishment and anything that came with it.

The above paragraph needs work.  Make Ranma more
surprised
and shocked that someone of Aizen's rep would do some-
thing like that.  And then make him angry about the
fact that he can't do anything about it.  Maybe that
would be when he decides that fighting Hallows would
be a nice way to work off his anger.

Ranma sat on that rooftop for hours, just thinking,
wallowing in his own
guilt over his crime.  A couple of times he thought
of committing seppuku,
but he knew that even that would not excuse him of
his sin.

If he knew what would happen, then why would he be
wallowing in guilt over it?  Regret it yeah, but since
it sounds as if it was something that had to be done
whatever the cost than I think you should rewrite that
paragraph.  

and take out the mention of seppuku :D

Only able to take so much of his own self pity,
Ranma decided that he would
do his best to atone for his sin by taking out as
many Hollows as possible.
It was at that moment he heard the woman's scream,
followed by that damnable

How about 'that familiar, damnable roar.'

roar.  Looking down from the roof, he saw it and its
prey.  The Hollow was
insect-like in shape, having six legs and three body
parts, but way too
large.  Its mask-covered face let out another roar

All three body parts were way too large?  All of equal
size or what?

before looking at its
prey once more.  Its prey was a rather pretty
chestnut-haired young woman,
maybe in her twenties, wearing a kimono.

Definitely not the best choice for running for one's
life

*Well, time to go to work.*



The Hollow pinned the woman down with one of its
legs, and was about to

Told ya so lady!

begin its feast on her soul.  Hearing a slashing

Replace 'its feast' with 'feasting'

sound, the Hollow cried out
in pain two seconds later as its leg wasn't there
any more.  Ranma turned to
the lady, "Are you alright Miss?"  After seeing her
nod, he confirmed why
the Hollow was after her.  "Stay here, it'll be
alright."

Heh. Ranma:  Come with me if you want to live!

<snip>

Nodoka Saotome was elated.  Her husband Genma was so
manly!  Manly 
enough to
get her pregnant on their first try.  That Isshin
Kurosaki was a 

Hmm, that's Nodoka all right!

wonderful
physician, and his wife Masaki was friendly enough
that they made her 
visit
fly by.


However that elation only lasted a short while as she
noticed a 
familiar
shimmer in the air.

However, that elation only lasted a short while when

she noticed...


"Keh heh heh, I smell something delightfully tasty."
The voice was 
male, but
one couldn't really tell with Hollows.  "A meal made
of Quincy would be
beautiful."



Normally this wouldn't be too much of a problem for
Nodoka, but she had 

Suggest but 'now' she

the
baby too worry about.  She was unsure as to how the
Quincy abilities 

baby to worry about.  She was unsure as to how her

Quincy abilities..

she had
would affect her unborn child.  It was entirely
possible that she would 
draw
too much energy and end up taking some of her child's
Reiatsu as well.



Having no other choice, Nodoka turned and ran.  Maybe
she could lose 
this
Hollow to some passing Shinigami or something.  Either
that or she 
could get
to her father's house.  Unfortunately, like all
Hollows, this one was 
fast.

Aren't Quincy's supposed to hate Shinigami's?  If

that's the case, than 

she shouldn't be too rely on one.  

"Where are you going, Quincy?  Are you scared of me?" 
The Hollow 
followed
closely behind her, dead set on having her for a meal.
 Nodoka was 
genuinely
scared and let out a shriek that would make any
schoolgirl proud, only 

Suggest 'let out a loud shriek'...

to be
drowned out by the roar of the Hollow that followed
her.



Running in a Kimono is remarkably hard, and though
Nodoka had done it
before, this time she wasn't able to fight back.   
The Hollow quickly
caught up to her and pinned her down with one of its
legs.  Damnable 

Replace Damnable with Damned; sounds better I think.

Hollow,
if it weren't for her child...  She screamed again.



Suddenly, one of its legs came off, bleeding that
horrible color blood 

horrible colored blood..

that
Hollows all bleed.  A young man, dressed in a black
hakama and holding 

'that all Hollows bled.'

a
katana was standing in between her and the Hollow. 
Nodoka gasped.  
This man
was a Shinigami, one of the slayers of her kind.  Her
sensei said to 
her
that they had good reason, but her former betrothed
disliked them.  At 
the
moment she was just thanking all the Kami she could
think of that this
Shinigami appeared.


"Are you alright, Miss?"  The Shinigami asked and
Nodoka nodded, still 
in
awe that she was being saved by what she had thought
was her enemy.  

How about 'still shocked and unable to believe that

she was...'

"Stay
here, it'll be alright."



Then the Hollow swung one of its other legs at the
Shinigami, who 
dodged it
quickly.  Using his Zanpakutoh to deflect the legs, he
slashed at the
Hollow's mask, but only managed to slash air.



"Oooh, Shinigami, you almost hit me with that one." 
The Hollow's 
haunting
voice resounded throughout the area. The Shinigami
then obviously 
noticed an
opening, one that Nodoka herself noticed, and he
slashed the Hollow's 
mask,
leaving a scratch.  Hearing the Hollow's cry of pain,
Nodoka felt some 
small
satisfaction.  Any pain to a Hollow, whether caused by
herself or 
others was
good pain.

How about 'was definitely a good thing.' instead of

'good pain.'


"Shinigami!  Try once more!"



"What do ya think I'm tryin' to do, lady?"  The
Shinigami seemed to be 
a bit
annoyed.  "I can't believe I'm going to have to do
this."



***********************************************



Ranma was panting heavily; this Hollow was tougher
than usual.  Or was 
it
that he was weaker?  Either way, he needed to end this
fight.  The 
woman
should have ran by now, but she was still here.

Suggest replacing 'ran' with 'escaped'

"Shinigami! Try once more!"  Great, the woman knew
what he was, and 
here he
was without his memory lighter.

What does Nodoka think this is?  A wrestling T.V.

show?

"What do ya think I'm tryin' to do, lady?"  No other
choice. "I can't
believe I'm going to have to do this."  Raising his
sword at the 
Hollow, he smirked.



"Ah, Shinigami...  What are you going to do?  You're
tiring.  I'll 
allow you
a few last words before I dine on this feast."



"Fine then.  Shine, Hoshimaru."  His Zanpakutoh began
to glow a 
brilliant
gold.  As he swung the sword at the Hollow, an arc of
golden light came 
out
of the sword, cutting through the Hollow's mask,
purifying it in an 
instant.



"Sugoi! That was amazing!"  The woman looked at him,
starry-eyed.  "You 
are
so... so... manly!"

Run, Ranma, Run, fast!

Ranma sweatdropped.  He allowed his Shikai to
dissipate, and he 
sheathed
Hoshimaru.  Glancing over the woman, he breathed a
sigh of relief.  She 
was
alright.  Though her face was paling quickly.  He
shuddered as he felt 
the
reiatsu of four strong Hollows.  "Oh... shit...  Get
behind me, quick!"

He should've scooped her up and start roof hopping

away instead


The woman did get behind him, though the four Hollows
surrounded them 
as
they materialized from Hueco Mundo.



"Um... Shinigami... we're in trouble aren't we?"



"It would seem so, lady.  Call me Ranma, Miss."



"Nodoka, Saotome Nodoka."



"Alright, Nodoka-san.  You can see me, but that
doesn't mean much but
explain that they are after your high reiatsu."

Add 'but it does explain...'

"I'm a Quincy, Ranma-san."



"A Quincy?  Why didn't you defeat that Hollow yourself
then?"



"I'm... I'm pregnant."



Nodding as if that explained everything, Ranma
released his Shikai once
more.  Launching a wave of light at the nearest
Hollow, he managed to 
push
it back some.  "Damn, I wish I wasn't so... limited."



Suddenly, an arrow of reiatsu struck one of the
Hollows in its mask, 
causing
it to evaporate immediately, and a firecracker landed
inside one of the
Hollows' mouth.  The firecracker exploded, taking with
it the Hollow.  
Two
figures jumped out beside Nodoka, one a diminutive,
bald old man with a
pipe, the other another old man who was about a foot
shorter than 
Nodoka,
armed with a bow made of reiatsu.



"Ishida-sensei, Happosai-sensei!"



"Well, well, No-chan, it seems you have gotten
yourself in a little 
mess.  I
can't stand it when pretty ladies are in danger.  Of
course I'll have 
you
reward me later for saving you."



"Happi!  Leave my student alone, and let's deal with
the Hollows."



The two older men quickly engaged in the battle, the
smaller moving 
around
quickly and the larger shooting arrows at the larger
Hollow.



"Right, two left.  Shinigami!  Your name and rank!"
Ranma looked at the 
old
man inquisitively as he dodged a Hollow strike. 
"Quickly, child!"

Introductions should wait when the battle is

finished. 

"Shihouin Ranma, Former Vice-Captain of the first
division."  Ranma 
answered
as he panted out



"Former?  Never mind that, Ranma m'boy can you take
out these Hollows 
if
Ishida and I distract them?"  Happosai leaped around
the Hollow's melee
strikes like a Mexican jumping bean.



The smaller Hollow launched a ball of tainted reiatsu
at Ranma who 
deflected
it with a shot from his Zanpakutoh.  "I think I can if
I get a well 
timed
strike.  Ishida-san, can you hit the smaller one while
this erm... 
person
and I take the larger one?"



Ishida-san nodded and took aim.



Ranma put his palm up at the smaller Hollow.  "Shot of
Blue Fire!"  The 
blue
fireball engulfed the smaller Hollow, doing barely any
damage to it, 
but it
did give Ishida-san time to let off his arrow, driving
deep into the
Hollow's mask.



Happosai quickly got to work on the larger Hollow. 
"Happodaikarin!"  
The
small firecrackers had amazingly large explosions,
causing the Hollow 
to cry
out in pain.  "Now, Ranma!"



Ranma launched his attack at the Hollow while it was
distracted by the
Happodaikarin, and was able to purify it instantly. 
Panting heavily, 
Ranma
sheathed his sword once more.  Happosai and Ishida-san
were in a 
similar
condition.  Yet another roar resounded through the
area.  "What is 
this?  Night
of the living Hollow?"

Who said this?  Ranma?  Make it clearer.

An arrow arced through the air, striking the
materializing Hollow 
behind the
trio.  They then looked over to see Nodoka, armed with
her Spirit Bow,
collapse.



Ranma rushed over to the woman to check if she was
alright.  Happosai 
and
Ishida-san had already gotten there.



"Why'd she collapse?" Ranma asked.  He looked at the
two men as if they
might know something.  He wasn't on the medical squad
in Soul Society, 
thus
he didn't know anything about what might be going on.

Okay, but a Vice-captain should have experience with

such things,
right? 

Happosai and Ishida-san began to examine Nodoka's
body.  "Her reiatsu 
seems
to be normal; she shouldn't have collapsed like that
from just using 
her
spirit bow."



"Ishida, as usual, you only see half of the picture. 
That spirit bow 
wasn't
only reiatsu; it had some ki mixed in as well.  She
poured all her 
energy
and then some into that shot. It would seem she didn't
want to be
overprotected." Happosai's face paled as he noticed
something in her
aura.  "Damn,
she was pregnant!"



Ranma looked at the Master.  "What do you mean,
'was'?"



"Look for yourself Ranma, m'boy!  The child's soul is
coming out of her

Move comma after yourself

womb, its reiatsu and ki are both spent!"



Ranma paled as he realized what he was seeing.  He was
watching her 
unborn
child die.  The pigtailed Shinigami could already see
the child's soul 
and
its Chain of Fate coming out from the woman's womb.



Not knowing what he could do about it, he began
preparations to perform
Konsoh.  "I wish it didn't have to be this way lady,
but your kid is 
dying."



Ishida-san sighed, "I'm sorry, No-chan.  I couldn't
teach you enough
control."



"Don't blame yourself Ishida.  No-chan always had this
problem, even 
before
she met you." Happosai looked over at Ranma.  "Ranma
m'boy, I want to 
save
that kid more than anything, but I'll need your help
to do it."

 "What do you mean?"



"I have a technique, known as the Soul Fusion.  The
child's reiatsu is 
far
too low for it to survive.  You, on the other hand,
former 
Vice-Captain,
have plenty of it.  This technique will take your
reiatsu and place it 
in
the child, much in the same way as when you use a
gigai."



"Huh?  You mean I'll become the child?"



"In a manner of speaking, yes, but it is slightly
different.  Do you 
still
want to do it?"



"Tell me what to do."



"Place your hands on her child's Chain of Fate." 
Ranma complied.  
"This may
feel funny, but it's the only way.  You will become
her child, fused 
with
this unnamed boy's soul."



Ranma nodded.  "Perhaps... perhaps this is the way I
can repent.  Do 
it,
Happosai-san."



The diminutive grandmaster smiled and then cried out,
"SOUL FUSION!"  
Ranma's
body transformed into light and both his light and the
baby's soul were
pulled into Nodoka's womb.

Put more description in the above paragraph about

the technique itself 

while it was being done.

Happosai smiled, the child was saved.  Perhaps he
would make a good 

Replace the comma with semi-colon.

martial
artist.  The technique was draining, but it managed to
save the child.  

Save the martial artist thought for later.

He
wouldn't remember his time before the birth,
unfortunately, but maybe 
that
would be for the best.



"Happi, I've been meaning to ask you, where are your
students?"



"Oh, they are just doing some self-training for a
while."



*************************************



"Saotome, we have to free ourselves of the master!"

of the Master!

"I know, Tendo, I know.  And I have an idea on just
how to do it!"


Soun and Genma were running from a horde of angry
women as they spoke.
  Eventually
they managed to ditch the women, but they had ended up
on the opposite 
side
of the town they needed to be on.



*************************************



Nodoka awoke in a familiar bed.  It was hers.  She
must have been 

How about 'It was her own, in her room.  She was

home.' 

carried
there by someone.



"No-chan, that Shinigami made a wonderful sacrifice
for you today."  
Happosai
could be seen at her bedside, looking drained.  "He
helped to save your
child by becoming him.  Please honor him and name your
son after him."



"What do you mean 'becoming him'?"



"I used a technique that fused his soul with that of
your child, 
placing him
in your son's body."



"So my son isn't my son?"



"No.  Ranma, assuming you name him that, will very
much be your son.  
He
won't remember being a Shinigami at all.  He'll still
have yours and 

'He just won't remember being a Shinigami, that's

all.'

Genma's
traits; he'll just be also similar to the Shinigami."



Nodoka's face became muddled in contemplation.  "He'll
be my son?"  
Seeing
the nod from Happosai, Nodoka stated seriously, "Then
I should name my 
son
after the Shinigami who sacrificed his memories and
sense of self to 
become
my son."



"I'm happy to hear that, No-chan.  Now I've been
meaning to ask you, 
why did
you use your spirit bow if you knew you were pregnant?
 Surely you knew 
the
effects it would have on your child."



"I... I'm not sure, Happosai-sensei.  All I can
remember is looking up 
and
seeing the Hollow appearing behind you three and then
waking up here."



"I see.  This may also explain why those Hollows were
after you as 
well.  You
were in no way masking your reiatsu.  Your pregnancy
must have been 
screwing
with your subconscious control."



Nodoka gasped as it began to make sense.  "But what
about now?"



"I put a dampener on your reiatsu that'll last for a
while.  You and 
your
child will be safe from Hollows as long as that
dampener is active."


"Thank you Happosai-sensei."  Nodoka's face turned
curious.  
"Happosai-sensei,
where did Ishida-sensei go off to?"



"He said something about having to help Ryuken with
his wife, and then 
he
left."



"What about Genma, where is he?"

"What about Genma?  Where is that no good, fat,

irresponsible husband

of mine." :D

"I have him and Soun working on some *extra study*
elsewhere.  They 
said to
me earlier that they'd take me out for sake tonight." 
Happosai smiled,
there were three things he loved in the world, the
Art, his silky 
darlings
(and the pretty women that wore them), and sake.



"Oh.  Tell him when you see him that I want to speak
to him."



"Alright, No-chan, I will."



"Thank you, Grandmaster."

*************************************



That night Happosai was sealed up in his cave, and a
little under nine
months later, Saotome Ranma was born.  How will this
little child, 
carrier
of Quincy blood and a Shinigami soul, affect the
world?  Only time will
tell.

I would suggest that you rewrite and make this a bit

longer.



Dave Wong

a.k.a. DarkWing
"Let's get dangerous"

Website: www.geocities.com/darksoar/start.html

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