An attempt at writing a fic in 500 words or less.

I've always found that writing less can be much harder than writing more.

Which is probably why I've gotten to the point that I call 100 KB
chapters relatively short.

Heh, I know what you mean.

     Duo dressed in red for the mission. Everything he wore was
dark, deep red, from his velvet vest and tailed coat, to his trim
slacks, to his silk shirt with the fall of lace at his throat and
cuffs, right down to the ribbon that tied off the end of his
braid.

He did cheat on the underwear, though - his red boxers were dirty.

:: valiantly resists the temptation to get sidetracked on a discussion of 
Duo's underwear ::

     "Maybe," he said, "but anyone who might recognize me also
knows that I'm just a poor L2 street rat -- one who's only known
starvation and disease and war. I'm the last person they'd expect
to be able to infiltrate high society." He flashed his signature
lopsided grin, but his eyes were hard, and glinting like chips of
ice behind the bone mask. "Trust me, Heero. There are times to
skulk in shadows, and times when the best hiding place is right
in plain sight.

I believe the comma after shadows is unnecessary.

Quite possibly.  I have the tendency to overdo it on the commas.  As you 
seem to have noticed.  ^^

     I snorted. "Where did you learn *that* little nugget of
espionage wisdom?"

If I was more confident in my appraisals of the Wing characters, I would
say that this line seems a little too sarcastic for Heero.  Since my
knowledge of them comes mainly from scattered watching of the dub years
ago, I'll just raise the possibility while noting that I'm probably wrong.

I seem to remember his sense of humor being rather sparse, but on the rare 
occassions that it did manifest, it was very dry.

     Clothed in the color of fresh spilled blood, he moved among
them like he belonged, chatting with strangers as if they were
old friends, pretending to sip at his champaign, and rubbing
elbows with the best of them.

Champaign should be champagne, unless it is an alternate spelling I'm
unaware of.

No alternate spelling.  Apparently I was being a bit *too* creative.  ;)

     Duo's mouth didn't move as his subvocalized response came
through my earpiece. "Just in time," he said, and I heard the
first strains of violins playing something that sounded like
Mozart.

Since you've already established that Heero doesn't know who Edgar Allen
Poe is, would he really know who Mozart is and recognize the music?  No
reason that couldn't be the case, but it seems a little odd to me.

Actually, I established that he hacked his American Lit grade.  ^^ Heero was 
shown being undercover as a student in some rather prestigous and expensive 
European schools.  While I can see him not knowing about some 19th century 
American author, I can't imagine him going to the same school as Relena 
Darlain and not knowing who Mozart was, or what a Viennese Waltz is.  In 
fact, that knowledge would seem to be, maybe not vital points, but important 
nonetheless to maintaining his cover.

     As the music started, everyone watched as the king led his
fairy princess to the ballroom floor and began a Viennese Waltz.

Likewise with recognizing the dance.

See above.

Everyone else quickly followed suite, pairing up and joining in
the dance.

"suite" should be "suit"

Nice catch.

     I watched Duo, as he watched the king.

That comma is unnecessary.

*sigh*  Very well.  (I luvs my commas.  And my semicolons.)

General thoughts:  Not too much to say.  It's a nice story and very well
written.  I certainly enjoyed it.

Thanks for the feedback.  :)  I will do my best to take the opportunity to 
return the favor.

-Krista 


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