Obscure Crossover Theater; Plunging the depths of fandom so you don't  
have to, and besides, we're bored.

Episode 1

* * * *

For the most part, the American was like all the others that passed  
through the customs station. Tall, brown hair and blue eyes.

'More gaijin scum,' the customs official thought as he asked the  
questions and examined the papers. 'Stupid foreigners running around  
polluting Japan.' However, the Gaijin did have some interesting  
jewelry. A pair of rings, one on each hand, made of metal with a  
strange sheen. They appeared to be a matched set, the tops made with  
designs that could interlock together.

Unfortunately, there was nothing about the gaijn that could be used  
to deny him entrance and he was waved through.

Five blocks away, all hell was breaking loose.

* * * *

Mariko Nawasaki was a recent college graduate. She was athletic, had  
a cute voice, and a chest that she wasn't shy about. She worked in a  
department store and was well liked by her coworkers.

Which made it all the more surprising when she turned into a seven  
foot tall crystal, metal, and flesh killing machine and headed for  
the street, the nearest entrance to which, was seven floors down.

Mariko took her time getting there.

* * * *

To stave off boredom and keep in shape, the Sailor Senshi had taken  
up crime-fighting. Their powers, intended for fighting the mythical  
and superhuman were more then a match for criminals and there were  
rumors on the street that several crime lords were banking mech and  
battle-suit research. Others were investing in cybernetics and  
genetic tinkering, all hoping to find a way to match the Senshi's raw  
physical power.

All in all, it was a fine time to be a genius with a taste for cold  
hard cash and a lack of scruples.

All of this explains why the Senshi were supremely, perhaps even  
arrogantly confident when they arrived at the department store.

That confidence was shattered within thirty seconds as Mariko went  
through them like a whirlwind and out onto the street.

And then, perhaps, just for the hell of it, she picked up a car and  
threw it at Sailor Jupiter.

Jupiter ducked the car easily enough, but then realized someone was  
standing in the car's path. Cursing, she ran for it, outrunning the  
car by inches, and tackle dived, catching the person around the waist  
and put out her foot, curling her body around their waist. The car  
hit her outstretched foot, her back hit the wall, which shattered  
under the impact and they both went through.

Jupiter must have briefly blacked out, because when she awoke, there  
was a man crouched over her, looking worried.

He was an American, she judged. Tall, with brown hair and blue eyes  
and an easy smile. Jupiter wasn't as prejudiced as her friends  
against gaijin, but neither did she regard them with any fondness.

"Are . . ." his brow furrowed in concentration. "Are . . . you . . .  
all right?" He spoke Japanese poorly and with a thick accent. But at  
least he spoke it.

Jupiter gave him a nod as she looked around. They were in a small  
grocery store of some kind, the empty shelves indicating that it had  
been closed for some time.

"Where . . .?" The man trailed off and then made a noise of disgust  
and Jupiter took pity on him.

"I speak English," she said. Ami had insisted that they all learn  
English. These days, you couldn't afford not to. Which was easy for  
Ami to say, since she not only spoke English, but also Chinese,  
Korean, Russian and Vietnamese.

"Oh," he said, rubbing his face with one hand. "I just didn't want to  
be one more ugly American, you know? My fiancee would kill me if I  
acted like an idiot."

Jupiter's lips twitched in an unwilling smile and then they both  
regarded the pile of rubble. Jupiter winced as she heard a dull thud  
from somewhere outside. Her friends were out there and there was  
nothing she could do from in here. "Stand back," she said and took  
her stance.

On a purely physical basis, Jupiter was the most powerful of the  
Senshi and her power was second only to Sailor Moon.

The pile of rubble laughed at her attacks and Jupiter swore. "I can't  
break through."

"Can I try?" the gaijin asked.

"Sure," Jupiter said. She could use a good laugh, she thought as she  
leaned against the shelving. She wondered if he would remove his  
jacket and try to impress her by flexing his muscles.

But instead, he looked down at his hands. "Weird," he said. "I  
haven't used these things in years, but I keep wearing them." For the  
first time, Jupiter noticed the rings on his hands. "Good thing, I  
guess." He gave a little laugh and then formed his hands into fists.  
"Thing ring, do your thing!" he said, and slammed his fists together.

There was a flash of light and Jupiter's jaw dropped. The man had  
been replaced by a seven foot . . . well, thing. It had skin made of  
bright orange rocks, large, four fingered hands, and surprisingly  
human blue eyes. Dark blue pants were on it's legs, and it wore black  
boots. "Stand back," it said in a deep, rough voice and backed up to  
the other end of the aisle. "It's clobberin time!" The Thing roared  
and charged.

* * * *

Author's note: Way back in the 60's or 70's, there was a short lived  
animated series starring The Thing. In the series, Ben Grimm was an  
"Aw shucks" sort of teenager who had been given a pair of rings  
created by a local scientist. When he slammed his fists together and  
spoke the words, he turned into The Thing.

With such a fascinating and well developed premise, it's hard to see  
why the show didn't last longer. *Cough*

Disclaimer: Sailor Moon was the creation of Noako Takeuchi, The Thing  
by Stan Lee. No money is being made from this and no such intent  
should be inferred.

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