Subject: [FFML] Re: [OMG] Drunkard's Walk V, Chapter 2
From: "Jimmy C" <jimmy.cwl@gmail.com>
Date: 9/29/2005, 11:35 AM
To: "FFML \(FFML\)" <ffml@anifics.com>


From: Bob Schroeck [rms@eclipse.net]

Well, folks...  it's been almost a year, and Chris and I have gone through
a couple dry spells each.  But the next installment is finally done.

What a year. The AMG tv series has come and gone, you guys seen it? Lots of
useful and current material there.

I find this chapter generally good, my standards are rather relaxed however.
A few things I wish to comment on:

The fact that (as far as Buckaroo and I could determine) I hadn't
aged a day in nearly 7 years, though, suggested that I wouldn't
need to worry (much) about racing the clock to make it back. <<

What about making it back before his friends passed away?

"Impossible!  She's supposed to be *dead*!" 

If this person is a goddess, you're in big trouble. The Doublet System is
supposed to discourage gods and demons from trying to kill each other. You
have an out, in that it appears that only some, not all, gods and demons are
doublets. Even so, killing someone on the other side, or letting them die,
is not something a god or demon would do lightly. So your explaination had
better be a good one, if the victim was indeed a goddess.

Good thing that Kubrick's "2002" obviously had existed in that universe,
too, 

Another transdimensional quirk, right? :)

"Look at this," he continued, and pointed at the books and
laserdiscs on his bed.  "The 'Valdemar' books by Mercedes Lackey.
The 'Bubblegum Crisis' anime.  The freaking *'Adventures of
Buckaroo Banzai Across the 8th Dimension'*, for Tyr's sake!"
With a wild gesture, he indicated his computer.  "'Kodomo no
Omocha', his third 'jump', is some stupid kids' anime that I
can't stand, and to top it all off, his bloody supposed
*homeworld* is a sourcebook for GURPS!"<<

You're going to have quite a bit of explaining to do here. It strikes me as
odd that, in all 4 jumps, no one has ever pointed out that Doug had been in
a fictional world before, yet someone in this world has easily identified
all five, including his homeworld. I know I haven't read the other
instalments of DW other than 2, for all I know, you haven't written them
yet. But consider his thoughts and actions on arrival, did he wonder which
fictional world he was in this time? When he was telling everyone about his
prior adventures, did he mention that those were fictional worlds? Did he
think about *not* saying so to avoid panicking the locals? No. His thoughts
and actions suggest that he felt the worlds he'd been to are as real as his
own. Why should this happen here and now, but not before?
I'm not completely sure what to do about the situation, for now, I suggest
moving 2 or 3 more of those worlds from Chris' library to the net search he
performed.
And will chris start wondering if *he* is in a fictional world?

If you're serious about keeping this from our little
guest, we need to get Skuld to put a filter on our network
connection and *watch* him.<< 

Yeah, keep him out of the local video and book stores.

but I hoped maybe Skuld would accept the toy robot as a peace offering.

Poor Doug, Skuld hates machanical devices that do nothing useful.

Makiyura Hall, Nekomi Institute of Technology

Megumi doesn't live in a dorm, she has her own apartment. 

Megumi usually just took the most convenient of the system's four routes
whenever she visited her brother.  

Megumi has a bike, she doesn't need to take the bus.

At the top she paused for a moment, one hand on the wooden gate; 

The temple doesn't have a front gate. But given what goes on frequently in
the yard, they should have installed one a long time ago, along with a demon
intrusion alarm.

"Sorry, no.  I'd rather the stuff I drive stay on the ground."

Could be memories of the time he flew the Shinden.

That's about it, any chance we can see the next chapter in less than a year?



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