$So late....  I'm so late....

Prologue

While there had been a real Senator Timely, Kang had him quietly killed 
and his remains disintegrated, subsequently replacing him with a robotic 
 

$Swap remains and disintegrated

duplicate. The man had been a reclusive bachelor with no family, so 
having the robot behave as though he were the real thing, using the same 
itinerary the senator had and mirroring every official decision the 
original had made meant no one picked up on any discrepancies between 
the two. Besides, the public tended to see politicians as caricatures 
rather than real people anyway, and people tended to see what they 
wanted to.
 

$Yeah, but it also says a lot about our current stock of politicians.

�I don�t think you�ve had the honor of meeting my new personal aide, 
Jonathon Smith.� The president indicated the man sitting at the couch.

 

$I should know that name. 

�I prefer John.� The man remained seated, nodding his head in the 
senator�s direction. �A pleasure, Sir.�

Now the man�s presence made sense. Kang returned his attention to the 
president, �I was sorry to hear about Alex.� Alex Jacoby had been the 
original personal aide to the president, dying only last week from a 
sudden heart attack. It had taken everyone by surprise, since he had 
seemed to be in perfect health.

 

$The Hand?
<snip>

It had been a simple enough matter to shift the election in the favor of 
the current president. The election had been decided by such a small 
percentage that all it took was gaining a few thousand votes in one 
state to shift it. With a man of Senator Timely�s influence whispering 
in a candidate�s ear about concentrating more attention on the state, 
the man had gained the necessary votes to win. There was one curious 
thing, though. By Kang�s estimation, with the additional campaigning the 
president had done, he should only have won by five thousand votes. 
Instead he had won a clear cut margin of twenty-thousand. Kang didn�t 
like his estimations being off. The stakes were too high to allow 
mistakes of any kind.

 

$Sounds like someone else was messing with the event, too.  Himself, 
from an alt timeline?

However, Kang�s fervent hope in doing an end run around The Tragedy

$I'm not familiar with that.  I assume its some nasty, world changing event?

Jonathon straightened up a bit. �That would be a bad idea, Sir. It was 
green-lighted by your predecessor, when you were vice-president. It 
would look bad for you to say things like this slipped by under your 
nose. Besides, it was Shaw Industries that won the contract for it, and 
he�s also one of those enlightened about your potential as president and 
 

$Last sentance is awkward.

contributed heavily to you.�

The president considered that. �Of course, an inquiry would be pointless 
now. The program was discontinued anyway. It�s probably best to let the 
matter lie.�

�And you read my recommendation?� Kang prodded. �The gamma readings on 
site match the ones taken by SHIELD. They clearly indicate this 
rampaging behemoth called the Hulk is clearly that muted pig. That means 
 

$mutated pig?

we�re responsible for its creation.�

�Yes,� the president said dubiously. �Well, I think you might be 
overstating the dangers a bit. The formation of a hunt team to destroy 
him sounds like sending good money after bad, especially since I�m 
planning on trimming the military�s bloated budget. Your suggestion 
would be counterproductive. Besides, he�s spending his time in Japan. 
He�s hardly our problem.�

�Perhaps you should see this latest file from SHIELD, Sir.� Kang handed 
the president the folder he had been carrying.

The president leafed through the folder, his eyes poring over the 
contents. Slowly his face took on a horrified expression.

Kang took it he had finally read the �good part� of the documents. �As 
you can see, Sir, the Hulk completely destroyed that large hill and 
razed the surrounding terrain.�

 

$Snerk.  Cute.

The president paled. �My god, the damage to the environment, it�s like 
ground zero of an extinction level event. It�ll take hundreds of years 
for that forest to grow back, and that hill will never return.�

 

$We hope, at any friggin rate.

At that point Jonathon stood up and held a hand out, silently seeking 
the documents. The president handed them to him absent-mindedly, his 
eyes distant.

 

<snip>

The president nodded. �Yes, that might work. And after the Hulk matter 
is taken care of, we�ll bring it up again at a later time. Good plan. I 
actually have a close friend high up in the Diet, too. She can probably 
help grease the wheels as well, since she�s of a like mind when it comes 
to environmental dangers like this creature. We�ll have Gyrich as the 
liaison. He�s been to Japan before, and he has the right sort of 
enthusiasm when it comes to situations with powered beings.�

 

$Yeah, you could say that.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

�It�s nice to see you, Kaori-chan,� Henry Peter Gyrich said in lightly 
accented Japanese. �My, you�ve grown up. Let me look at you.� He held 
her out at arm�s length, staring at her a moment as a look of 
consternation crossed his features. It disappeared almost as quickly as 
it had arrived. �Kaori, I want you to know that you�ll always be my 
goddaughter, no matter what your sexual orientation is.�

 

$So long as you're not a mutant lesbian, you're okay in my book.

A fist met his face. �I am not a lesbian!�

 

$Ah, we all wanted to see Gyrich get punched.

The two men standing guard a discreet distance behind Gyrich turned to 
one another. The first one said, �Told you so.� The second one handed 
him several bills of money in response.

Kaori took a closer look at the men and realized they were identical 
twins. That put her on edge. She had bad luck with twins. �And who are 
you two gentleman?�

As one they twisted their necks, causing a cracking sound. �Our name is 
Mr. Smith, Miss Anderson.�

 

$Ah, 'Snarky' Smith, I see.

�My name isn�t Anderson,� Kaori said, bewildered.

Gyrich continued. �He literally does the work of a hundred men.�

�Yeah, but I only get paid like one,� Jamie Two grumbled.

 

$So what else is new?  Busting ass never pays.

Jamie One walked up to Kaori. �Since you�re not lesbian, like I said 

>from the start,� he shot a glare toward Jamie Two. �How about we go out 

dancing later? I can do a mean conga line.�

 

$Heheh.  I bet he does.  Too bad it only takes two to tango.

�You will date my goddaughter over my dead body,� Gyrich said in a tone 
that could chill ice. He returned his attention to Kaori. �All of the 
equipment was sent ahead of me and should be enroute to the rendezvous 
point. There isn�t all that much. We only have one specialized squad for 
the actual field operation, some support personnel for the equipment, 
and a platoon of normal grunts to help with any manual tasks. How about 
things on your end?�

Kaori began leading him to a large structure next to field. �This whole 
school will be our base of operations. Space has been made in that gym 
over there. I�m actually just a liaison for the local police, though. 
I�m to keep our people out of the way of your people and the ministry�s.�

 

$Should ministry be capped?

�Ministry?�

Kaori tensed up. �Yes, the overseers on our side aren�t JSDF, like it 
was supposed to be. At the last minute they got pulled off and some 
outfit connected with the Ministry of Health and Welfare stepped in and 
took over everything.�

 

<snip>

However, after smashing his way through the castle�s defenses, the Hulk 
discovered Chi was not a robot at all, but a pretty girl (though not as 
pretty as the Hammer Girl).

$Ah, beauty is in the eye of the Hulk, I suppose.  Personally, I thought 
pretty much the entire chobits cast was cuter than Akane.  Even the boys.

When the tiny girl on Chi�s shoulder asked 
the Hulk what he was doing there, and he explained he was there to 
destroy the evil robot, Chi, the pretty girl began crying. She said Dr. 
Doom was a bad person that wanted to do bad things to Chi, who was a 
poor helpless girl that was trying to help the world.

 

$Poor Doom.  He had a great idea, but didn't factor in Excel.

�The homeless population in Japan is so insignificant as to be almost 
non-existent,� Irie said in an almost teasing way.

 

$Of course it is.  They also are a peace loving society and have never 
started any wars or commited any atrocities.
<snip>

Walker seemed to pick up on it. �You know what you�re doing, though. I 
can tell by the way you move. They said you ain�t regular military, 
though. What do you Hounds do?�

�Chase cats.�

�Cats are so dangerous in Japan you need an automatic rifle to take them 
out?�

�Some breeds.�

 

$Nuku Nuku probably would fit.  And I guess Kagome, that is, Hellcat, 
would, too.
<snip>

Ryouga looked through the bottom of the hole, keeping as close to the 
edge as he could without giving away his position. There were only two 
people dressed in military uniforms. Surprisingly, one was a gaijin who 
had some sort of box in his hands. The other was a girl. Ryouga didn�t 
like hitting girls, but sometime it had to be done. Besides, girls 
tended to have little reluctance when it came to smacking men around, 
when they felt there was just cause.

 

$Ain't that the truth.  Double standards happen both ways.

Once they passed by, Ryouga leaped down through the hole. He tried 
landing quietly, but the weakened flooring groaned under his sudden 
weight, threatening to break. Both soldiers turned in surprise.
 

<snip>

�Right. Good luck. I hope you find some place were soldiers can�t find 
you.� For some reason, that desire struck a chord in Ryouga, even if he 
had never been chased by soldiers.

$Until now.  Or has he?

He waved at them and turned to go.


 

<snip>

�Now it�s too late. We liked you, Mister, really we did. You helped us, 
and we were real appreciative, but now it�s too late. You�ll tell others 
and they�ll blame Kenny again, like they always do. It�s not his fault, 
his condition. We was poor, and his father was dead, and fishing was 
bad. He found it washed up on the shore and thought it was just a fish. 
He didn�t know it was a mermaid, not with its top missing.

$Oooh, now that's creepy.  But personally, I think I would realize a 
bare breasted, half woman, half fish would probably be a mermaid.  
Wonder how it lost its top?  Ataru? 

On the other hand, I wonder what happens to fish that snack on them.  Is 
that the source of great whites, or just sea monsters?

Wasn�t right 
it made him into what he is, and gave him an appetite for people. It�s 
hard on us, it is. Always having to move before people find out. It�s 
just not right.�

Ryouga had heard legends of what happened to people that devoured 
mermaid�s flesh. Some said it gave the eater immortality, while others 
said it only brought death. He had also heard it changed people into 
monsters. Since he didn�t believe in mermaids, there was no reason to 
wonder which of the legends were true, though by all appearances it was 
the last.
 

$Should have found the heart.  That's good, if you cook it with lots of 
eel sauce.

�Perhaps if you go to the police they�ll help Kenny find a cure,� Ryouga 
suggested, peering into the gloom, praying he could find an alternate exit.

�They�ll just lock him up when it ain�t his fault. No, it�s better this 
way. Kenny was going to have these two as a meal before we left, but 
he�s got a hearty appetite. Three will keep him happy for a while.� She 
nodded at the misshapen form of her son

Kenny allowed the soldiers to slump to the floor, then charged Ryouga. 
Even he was startled by the burst of speed from someone so large. The 
top of the cloak fell away, revealing the face of Kenny. It was hideous, 
large and lumpy, with scales, large fish eyes, and a hole where his nose 
should have been. Not a strand of hair was left, on his head, and only 
hunger existed in his jaundiced-colored eyes.

 

$Oh, I see.  He's a third stage Deep One.  Ia Cthulu, my brother.  Ia.

Ryouga only had a chance to take a half-step back when the cursed-human 
was upon him. Kenny said nothing, given the shape of his head and neck 
perhaps he was incapable of creating human sounds. His mouth worked 
fine, though, as he opened his maw so large it appeared his jaw must 
have dislocated. Two rows of centimeters long teeth were revealed, and 
 

$The plural 'centimeters' reads odd.  Needs a number.

sank deep into Ryouga�s shoulder, causing him pain like nothing else 
ever had. He roared in agony.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Yumi watched her son go to work. He had a hearty appetite, her boy did. 
He�d eat all three of the meddlesome people, and then they could move on 
to somewhere else. Maybe Kyoto. There were lots of people there. Who 
would miss a few? One thing Japan didn�t suffer from was a shortage of 
people. She was doing the country a favor, when one thought of it. 
Kenshiro was a good boy, he was.

Then she saw something peculiar. Kenny had stopped for some reason. 
Usually he would have bitten through the boy�s shoulder and worked his 
way up to the torso. He had wonderful teeth. No need for a dentist, not 
for him. But instead he ceased chewing for some reason.

 

$Hulk going to do a muscle flex jaw break like he did on the pit bull in 
the movie?

Then he started to rise up. Yumi wondered what was going on when she 
realized he was rising up until his feet were dangling off the floor. 
Then she saw it, the huge green hand reach up from under his arm to grab 
Kenny by his neck. The arm was huge, even bigger than her Kenny�s, and 
the cries from the boy became deeper bellows of rage.

The arm pried Kenny from his perch on the boy, and Yumi saw the huge 
green beast that now had her son in its powerful grip. Her heart 
trembled, just like it had when she realized what her son had eaten on 
that windswept beach so many months ago.

The beast roared, �You try to eat Hulk! You hurt Hulk! You make Hulk 
bleed! Now Hulk will make you bleed!� He threw Kenny across the length 
of the room. The cursed boy�s body collided with a pillar that buckled 
under the force of the impact.

�Kenny!� Yumi cried out, not understanding what was going on, other than 
some terrible monster was trying to kill her child.

 

$Waiting for it...

The mermaid�s curse left Kenny with the stamina and power of a dozen 
men. He rose back to his feet and charged the Hulk, intent on finishing 
his meal.

Eyes rimmed in red from pain and rage, the Hulk drew back his fist and 
struck the incoming mass of flesh hard in the stomach with an uppercut. 
The blow sent Kenny sailing back where he had originally been tossed, 
this time impacting with the ceiling. He bounced off and back to the 
ground where he lay motionless for several seconds. Then he began to 
rise again.

�Hulk will smash stupid monster!� the emerald behemoth promised.

It was not to be as the combination of the loss of pillar and impact to 
the ceiling proved too much for the ages old structure to bear. Three 
quarters of the ceiling came down upon Kenny, crushing him under tons of 
rubble since that part of the basement extended to a fallen in part of 
the warehouse. Metal rods and concrete stuck up from the pile of debris, 
but there was no movement other than the slow settling of dust.

�Kenny!� Yumi shouted, running over to pile of concrete debris

 

$Oh my god...  Nah.    Need a period.

Xxxxxxxxxxx

The Hulk watched the pile of rubble intently, wanting to smash the 
monster that had hurt him so severely. Though only with his good arm, 
since the wounds the monster had given him were still bleeding. He 
looked down at the holes still there. Never had he been hurt like this 
before. He wanted to punch the creature again and again until there was 
nothing left.

So intent was the Hulk on wanting revenge that he was unaware of the 
activity on the surface until lights shined down upon him. He looked up 
and was perplexed by what he saw. Six giant armored figures, each nearly 
four meters tall, looked down on him from edges of the hole. The figures 
had oversized forearms and lower legs, and cables led from those parts 
into a huge hump on their backs, though they remained upright. They 
weren�t robots, however, as each one had a clear faceplate, and behind 
them were the faces of men.

Xxxxxxxxx

Major Glenn Talbot had led his five men to the site where they had 
received the last transmission of Sergeant Walker and his Hound guide. 
When they had failed to report in, General Ross feared the worst and 
ordered Talbot to lead the squad of Mandroid Armor out to locate the 
soldiers, low profile be damned.

That was the way Talbot wanted it. He finally had a chance to be the 
hero and impress Betty Ross, the general�s daughter. It had been love at 
first sight for Talbot, though he quickly learned she seemed to only 
have eyes for that wimp Bruce Banner. But that was because she hadn�t 
met a man like Glenn Talbot. Once she saw what a true man of action was 
capable of, downing that walking disaster called the Hulk, she�d fall 
for him in an instant. Then he�d show her what real men were capable of 
and why nerds like Banner weren�t worth giving the time of day.

The sound of something collapsing had drawn the squad�s attention. They 
had raced as fast as they could to the source of the noise, only to 
discover a scene out of some horror movie. It was a pit full of human 
remains, dozens of them, some of them showing signs of having been 
eaten, with a huge, roaring monstrosity in the center of the charnel 
house. The Hulk looked even more dangerous and horrifying in person, 
especially when surrounded by so many dead bodies.

Talbot made certain that image was being transmitted back to the base. 
�Can you see this, General?�

�We see it. My god, we see it,� Ross said.
 

$Hulk: It misunderstanding!  Hulk swear!

Kaori�s voice came over in the background. �The Hulk was responsible for 
all the disappearances. He�s a serial killer of some kind! He has to be 
killed!�

Another voice, much more official in tone, came over. �This is Soyozoh. 
You have my permission to use lethal force in dealing with the Hulk.�

�Thank you, Sir,� Talbot said. He was about to order the men to open 
fire on the Hulk when he noticed in elderly woman nearby. It looked like 
she was trying to dig her way out to escape the Hulk. It was probably 
his latest intended victim. Well, he had no intention of allowing her to 
be devoured by that monster.

As Talbot considered how to get the Hulk out, the creature did the job 
for him. While he had heard stories of the Hulk�s prodigious leaps, the 
major was unprepared for how far and fast the monstrosity could go with 
barely tensing his legs. He sailed up and out of the pit, landing a good 
twenty meters away. The behemoth turned, rage evident on his features. 
Talbot wondered if, after he killed the Hulk, that look would still be 
on his face. He would love to keep the head and mount it on his wall 
next to his other trophies. The Hulk was just a mutated pig, after all.

 

$Mmm, hulk-bacon.

�As we practiced, men,� Talbot ordered. The men ran around the Hulk, 
surrounding him in a circle, yet each was mindful not to stand directly 
across from one of the others.

Talbot wanted to open fire, but protocol dictated he try to end things 
peacefully. �Surrender, monster, and submit yourself to United States 
authority.�

The Hulk bellowed, �Stupid metal man with big hands, Hulk not monster. 
Hulk stop monster.�

 

$Probably needs an exclaimation mark at the end.

That sounded like a refusal to Talbot. Everything was recorded for 
posterity. Now he would have a clear conscience in destroying the Hulk. 
�Unit�s 2 and 5, maneuver D4.�

�Roger!� the men operating the Mandroids shouted. Each of the men raised 
their metal gauntlets and opened their hands, pointing them in the 
Hulk�s direction. From their index fingers thick cables shot out. Unit 2 
snared the Hulk�s good arm, while the other wrapped one around the 
Hulk�s left ankle.

�Now!� Talbot ordered. Thousands of amps shot through the cable and into 
the Hulk, making his body twitch and hair stand on end. It was proving 
too easy.

The Hulk stopped twitching long enough to brace his feet and tense up 
his good arm. Then he jerked the snared arm, whipping the Mandroid 
around as though he weighed one pound instead of a thousand. The 
Mandroid went sailing into the air, colliding with the other one that 
was electrocuting the Hulk. The impact caused the cable around the 
Hulk�s arm to snap and the one around his leg stopped conducting 
electricity into his body, going slack. The Hulk stepped out of cable 
and turned to confront his remaining attackers.

�Stupid metal men are just as bad as robots! Everyone attacks Hulk for 
no reason!

$Mostly, they really do.

Now Hulk will smash!�

Now Talbot felt the first vestige of fear creep along his spine. The 
Hulk hadn�t been affected by the electricity in the slightest. But years 
of training and cool professionalism took over. �Heat beams! We�ll boil 
the blood in his veins!�

 

<snip>

The Mandroids started to do so, pouring the fire from their hands at 
their target.

Then a shield whizzed through the air and hit Unit 2�s in the hands, 
striking one and bouncing off to hit the other, sending his blasts awry.

 

$Ranma's not so bad, once you start getting to know him.  Of course, 
then you actually GET to know him, and he's an arrogant prick.

A flying hammer impacted with Unit 3, sending him sailing through the 
air, his flight arrested upon crashing into a building.

 

$His lady love to the rescue.

A pair of repulsor rays struck Unit 4, knocking him off his feet.

 

$I see the upgrade is comeplete.

Two arrows struck Unit 5 in the hands, each exploding and disrupting his 
firing capabilities.

 

$And doing it all ambiguously!

Talbot and the remaining Mandroid discontinued their attack and turned 
to face the new threat. Standing boldly before him on a nearby pile of 
rubble, the major identified the entire roster of the Avengers, save for 
one female in a suit of power armor of some kind, one much smaller than 
the Mandroids. Since the large, bulky armor of the Iron Rose wasn�t 
present, he assumed this was a new version of the armor. Lighter by far 
than its predecessor and a mix of grey and black instead of jet black, 
it looked too slender to be very powerful.

 

<snip>

Darting and weaving through the unrelenting fire, Captain Japan was 
suddenly standing in front of the Mandroid, bringing his shield up in 
front of him. Like some hunk of metal that would stop a full power 
energy blast. The youth was a century too late. Maybe destroying the 
shield would convince the hero he was totally outclassed.

Unit 2 put his hands up flush with the shield and fired at point blank 
range. Captain Japan remained where he was,

$And that never made any sense to me.  Even less than the rest of it.

but the back blast from the 
concussion traveled up the barrels the discharge had come from. It went 
up the Mandroid�s arms, blowing the metal off and causing the suit to 
shut down from the catastrophic damage it had suffered. It froze up, 
standing like a statue.

Captain Japan smirked at the man behind the faceplate. �Sorry, Pal, I 
gotta do it.� He placed one arm against the armor and pushed.

The Mandroid fell over with an audible thump.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Unit 6 found himself facing off against the Goddess of Thunder. Now this 
was a chick he�d love to go hand-to-hand with, and do a whole lot of 
other things to as well. �You�d better give up,� he warned. �This unit 
is designed to withstand lightning strikes. There isn�t anything you can 
do.�

�Thou thinkist the tinkerings of man can overcome the full fury of the 
storm? Think again.� Thor tapped her hammer to the ground. A lightning 
bolt five times greater than any normal one struck the Mandroid in the 
top of the head.

$Hell, even the BEST we've been able to make so far is a third of the 
power of a regular bolt of lightening.

When the flash of light cleared, all could see the now 
smoldering singed black remains of the giant, inoperable hunk of metal 
with its pilot now trapped inside.

 

$Heh, Thor outclasses most.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Unit 3 squared off with the Iron Rose�s new streamlined armor that was 
hovering before him. �Get ready to have your ass kicked, Avenger. You�re 
dealing with a twenty million dollar, top-of-the-line power armor built 
by America�s greatest mechanical genius. There�s no way that rice burner 
you�re wearing can stand up to it.�

 

$Ooh, adding the rice burner insult, how very.

The Iron Rose replied, �While I will concede Stark�s inventive genius 
might rival my employer�s own, I�m afraid that what you�re wearing is a 
mass-produced, cost-efficient production model, while my own armor is a 
unique, highly customized, prohibitively expensive armor, which means I 
can afford to have the absolute best of every piece of technology there 
is, all of it handmade by the person who developed it.�

Unit 3 suddenly felt very uneasy. He tried to prove the Iron Rose wrong 
by firing upon her. However she proved far too fast and nimble, deftly 
evading his energy blasts in an elaborate aerial ballet. She literally 
flew circles around him, lashing out everywhere with her repulsor beams 
and causing warning lights to flash all across his readouts. Then she 
became creative, using lasers, tasers, and a dozen other exotic weapons, 
as though she were testing out their capabilities, on him. Within 
minutes his armor was reduced to a useless hunk of metal.

Silently he swore the next time he bought a car, it would be a Honda.

 

$Toyota, man, I'm telling ya.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Unit 5 found himself confronted by a red garbed man wearing a devil�s 
mask. He also found himself laughing contemptuously. �I know you. You�re 
Daredevil, the powerless superhero who hides stuff in his pants. You go 
ahead and throw your billy clubs, chains, and whatever useless crap you 
got stuffed in there. I�m going to find me a real superhero.�

 

$Heh.  At least he has a superpower. 

�How about I try this?� Daredevil reached into his sleeves and pulled 
out in object.

Unit 5 laughed even harder. �Oh yeah, a water balloon. Now that�s 
dangerous. I guess I�d better surrender before you make me rust solid.�

Daredevil lobbed the balloon at Unit�s 5 faceplate. It exploded against 
the plastic, blackening the view so the man inside couldn�t see 
anything. �Paint? You think that can stop me? I got heat sensors, you 
know.�

Unit 5 switched them on just in time to make out Daredevil throwing a 
small metal can at him. Unit 5 tried to block the can, but it slipped 
past his arms and hit him in the face, where it broke and splattered 
some wet substance over him.

�You already messed up by windshield,� the soldier said.

Daredevil pulled out a book of matches, lit one up, and threw it at the 
Mandroid. Instantly his sensor unit was covered in flame, turning his 
view an unrelenting red.

Blinded, Unit 5 was unaware of the archer

$Who doesn't have a real power.  Anyone can shoot an arrow.

that had made her way behind 
him until four blast arrows impacted at his shoulders and knees, 
disabling all of his limbs, leaving him to collapse on his stomach, 
unable to move or see.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Unit 4 found himself confronted by twenty feet of human being in the 
form of Giant Man. While the Mandroid armor made Unit 4 extremely tall, 
there was something terribly disturbing about seeing someone so 
proportionately huge.

�I feel extraordinarily Lilliputian,� Unit 4 said to himself. He then 
activated his external speakers. �You know, shooting you isn�t going to 
be a problem. I don�t think I could miss if I tried.�

 

$Yeah, Tofu would be smarting from one of those shots.

�How about shooting me instead?�

Unit 4 couldn�t locate the source of the voice, until he saw a small 
girl with wings out of her back hovering no more than a handful of 
centimeters in front of his faceplate. She waved at him, smiling pleasantly.

�You�re got power blasts, don�t you?� Unit 4 asked.

�Yes,� Wasp answered.

It now occurred to him that her smile wasn�t all the pleasant, at least 
not as far as he was concerned. He knew enough about the specs of the 
Mandroid armor to know the faceplate was the weak point, and that at 
such a close range he couldn�t do anything to the Wasp that wouldn�t 
cause him considerable damage as well.

�I have no interest in wasting the taxpayers� money in trashing this 
armor.� He held his hands up in surrender.

 

$Yay!  Let's elect him president.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxx

 

<snip>

�No, you can�t be that strong!� Talbot protested.

�Hulk can be that strong, because Hulk is the� strongest� one� there� 
is!�

$Except maybe Juggernaut.  Oh, and I bet the Silver Surfer could kick 
his ass.  Galactus, certainly.  Oh, and Gladiator.  Doomsday, from DH, 
and Apocalypse, as well.

And with a tearing of metal, the Hulk broke free, every one of the 
Mandroid�s fingers shattering into useless stumps.

 

$Nicely dramatic.

The Hulk fell to the ground gasping, the exertion of overcoming the 
Mandroid taxing even his might, and leaving him more vulnerable than ever.

�Damn you!� Talbot raged, his mind going through a thousand different 
scenarios on what he would do to the Hulk once he was free. Then he 
became aware of an increase in the temperature inside the armor. Smoke 
began to fill the airtight cockpit. He tried using the manual release, 
but discovered the mechanism had shattered in the crash, rendering it 
non-functional. Lacking that, the only way to exit the Mandroid was a 
team of men armed with cutting torches to burn him out, and the nearest 
ones were nearly a mile away.

�No, I�ll die!� Talbot shouted through the armor.

The cries attracted the attention of someone nearby.

The Hulk began walking forth.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Bruce Banner arrived at the scene just in time to see the Hulk lumbering 
toward the fallen Mandroid. While Talbot had made his contempt for 
Banner known from the outset, the doctor had ignored it for the most 
part. He was used to being picked on since his college days. He didn�t 
get angry. Not anymore. Becoming angry reminded him of his father. Made 
him like his father. Better to keep the anger bottled up, ignore it 
until it went away.

Besides, there was always Betty to think about. Beautiful Betty, who, 
against all reason, was attracted to the wimp Bruce Banner. Her love was 
so magnificent that he had started to not think of himself in those 
terms anymore. If someone like Betty could fall for someone like him 
instead of a walking testament to testosterone, like Glenn Talbot, maybe 
Bruce Banner wasn�t so insignificant after all.

 

$Banner, coming to terms with his anger?  Actually growing up a bit?  
Nah.  My willing suspesion of disbelief can't handle it. 

Heh, could you imagine a fic based off of Sandler's Anger Management 
with the Hulk/Ryoga?  That'd probably be pretty funny.

He wanted to prove that to himself, so Bruce and stolen away with his 
 

$had stolen

Gamma Imploder, intent on ending the situation. After seeing the 
Mandroids transmission of all of those bodies in the pit, innocent 
people the Hulk had killed, Banner knew there was no other way to claim 
absolution than by personally killing the Hulk. Until he saw that 
massive, unmarked grave, he had admired the Hulk, in a way. The Hulk 
took crap from no one and gave even better than he got. There was 
something liberating in fantasizing about being like the Hulk, of 
swatting the obnoxious Talbots of the world like a fly. But after seeing 
those bodies, Banner stopped admiring the Hulk. He was a merciless 
machine of rage, one that Banner had created, and it was only right that 
he put an end to it as well.

 

<snip>

The Hulk pulled the broken blade from his shoulder, keeping it in his 
good hand as he stood over the prone, screaming Talbot. Banner felt 
sick. He had never seen a man disemboweled before.

$It's not as bad as you'd think, though there is a lot of screaming.

Luckily, the Gamma 
Imploder would be powered up in the next ten seconds. It might not be 
enough time to save Talbot, but it would be enough to avenge him.

 

$Perfect.  Heh heh heh heh...  Oh, Betty, I feel so guilty.  I wasn't in 
time to save Talbot.  Hold me?

The Hulk brought the hand up high over his head and brought it down into 
the armor. Banner closed his eyes as he heard the impact. Talbot�s 
screams continued uninterrupted as there was a grind of metal on metal. 
Not wanting to see it, but unable to keep his mentally visualizing 
everything, Banner opened his eyes.


The Hulk looked disdainfully at the man, then walked away, holding his 
wounded shoulder gingerly. Now the Hulk was in the clear, allowing 
Banner to finish the matter once and for all. A simple pull of the 
trigger to clear his conscience, but instead of firing, the weapon fell 
to Banner�s side. He wasn�t sure of exactly what happened, but anything� 
no, anyone that could show mercy to a foe like Talbot would not die at 
the hands of Robert Bruce Banner. Nor would he create anymore weapons to 
capture of kill the Hulk. Upon returning to the base, he would break the 
 

$or kill

Gamma Imploder and destroy the plans to it.

 

$Now that's the man Betty Ross likes.

The matter of the Hulk was finished, at least as far as Banner was 
concerned.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

�Hey, Hulk, old Buddy. You look like crap.�

The Hulk stopped walking randomly in one direction and looked up to see 
the Avengers surrounding him. The speaker had been Captain Japan. �Does 
Shield Man want to fight Hulk?�

Captain Japan shook his head, but kept most of his shield between him 
and the Hulk. �Nah, we�re here to help ya�. After all, us Avengers got 
to stick together.�

�You�re going to help Hulk?� he asked suspiciously.

Thor spoke. �Indeed, already we have smote those that sought to do thee 
harm.�

Seeing the Pretty Hammer Girl cheered the Hulk up immeasurably. �Hulk 
tried to find Avengers, but couldn�t seem to find them. Hulk gets lost 
easily. Stupid roads change underneath his feet. All forests look the 
same. And sometimes hills attack Hulk.�

 

$Damn the hills, anyway.  Heh, you're milking that one for all it's 
worth, aren't you?

�I� see,� Hawkeye said slowly. �Life is pretty hard on you.�

Iron Rose considered that. �You do seem to have a problem with locating 
things. Why don�t we plant several global positioning units in your 
clothing so that we can locate you wherever you go?�

The Hulk looked inquiringly at Thor. �Um, is that good idea?�

�Verily.�

�Then Hulk will let you do that.�

Iron Rose added, �I might be able to rig up an audio directional unit 
that you could use. If you have your Avengers card, and say, �I�� I 
mean, �Hulk want to go home� it will start beeping. The closer you get 
to Avengers mansion, the louder the beeps get. So you won�t have to pay 
attention to where you are walking, just listen for the beeps and walk 
around until they get louder.�

 

$Mmm.  I forsee problems with that.  A swath of destruction a hulk wide 
spiraling enexorably to the avenger's hideout.

�Hulk is good at listening. When tree fall in forest, Hulk knows he can 
hear it, even if he not there to hear it.�

 

$He's right you know.

�Right,� Iron Rose said slowly.

Giant Man, shrunk down to normal size, moved closer to the Hulk. �Why 
don�t we have someone look at that shoulder of yours?�

�Can�t Tall Man, who isn�t tall now, see it from there?� the Hulk asked.

�I mean let a doctor see it.� Giant Man corrected. He examined the 
wound. �Amazing, it�s already healing. If you continue on like this, I 
think it�ll be healed by the end of the day.�

 

$Tofu: That'll be 35000 yen, please.
Because HMO's suck.

�If Hulk gets scab, Hulk won�t pick at it,� the green giant promised.

�You�re a good patient,� Giant Man said cheerfully.

Captain Japan spoke once more. �Why don�t we head back to the mansion 
and find out what that supposed deal with the military was? Not that 
we�ll turn the Jolly Green Giant over to them. I just want to know 
what�s going on and if those guys were legit or not.�

Iron Rose nodded. �My employer has impressive connections with the 
government. She can buy us the time we need to ascertain what is 
happening. The government isn�t foolish enough to anger one of its 
primary munitions suppliers, one that employs over five thousand of its 
tax-paying citizens.�

The Hulk couldn�t follow what the metal girl was talking about. Or even 
who the metal girl was. She sounded like the Stove Person, but she 
didn�t look like her. It was confusing. At least the Hammer Girl was as 
pretty as always. But as pleasing to his senses as the Hammer Girl was, 
there was something else the Hulk needed to urgently to take care of. 
�Hulk is hungry. Are there beans at the mansion? Hulk likes beans.�

�All the beans you can eat,� Hawkeye said.

�I�ll be leaving before that happens,� Daredevil assured him.

�Your super nose would be affected by that, wouldn�t it?� Captain Japan 
jibed.

�At least I have a super power!� Daredevil snapped back.

 

$Oooh, burn.

As the two began bickering, the Hulk assessed the situation as his 
simple, direct mind could. Looking around at the heroes assembled about 
him, the Hulk felt unnaturally good for the first time in months, as 
though he had finally come home. That was especially good, since he 
couldn�t think of an actual home he ever had. He wanted a home, though. 
He was certain of that. He didn�t know why, and didn�t care. Just 
wanting it was enough.

 

<snip>

�I will,� Kaori shuddered. She�d prefer a date with both Saeba twins 
then spend one minute longer around Irie Soyozoh. Worse, she had a 
terrible feeling she�d be meeting him again whether she wanted to or not.

 

$Bitchiness is it's own punishment.  In stories.

Ah, finally.  Nice chapter.  I've always liked the hulk.  These filler 
chapters are pretty fun as an in depth look at hero specific villians.  
I see Mousse's is out, so I'll be working on that soon.  Who's after 
that?  Kodachi?  Or Ukyo?  I'm guessing you'll save Ranma for last, as 
the figure head of the avengers.  Nice fic, definitely fun to see a 
mermaid-monster make an appearance.  I also like what you've done with 
Banner.  Structurally, very clean.  I saw few mistakes, which have 
probably already been pointed out to you.  Here's my two cents!

-Nugar

Look for my comments on chapter four soon!  But not today.

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