Nugar wrote:

DB Sommer wrote:

Prologue

It was a dark and stormy night.

Well, that wasn�t exactly true. It was an overcast and drizzly
afternoon, but that seemed too mundane for the seriousness of the
mission, Pink noted to herself.

$Oh, god.  You and Pink and Link.  You have entirely too much fun with 
them.

One of the advantages to using one shot characters that had no development, 
they are virgin territory. Though no one stays virgin in this for very long.

So she mentally took literary license to
make the situation more dark and foreboding, setting the proper mood.

$Memory... EDIT!

Pretty much

After all, she wanted people to read her memoirs, and at least one
chapter was going to be devoted to her and Link�s journey of revenge
against that awful Joketzusoku who had dared to ambush Link and disgrace
her in front of the whole village. The cowardly bitch had the audacity
to attack Link for no reason, strip her naked, tie her up, leave her in
the middle of the village, and write on her backside �Professional slut
taking on all comers. Enter here,� with arrows pointing to her pussy.
While everyone had better sense than to take advantage of the situation,
someone had taken pictures of her predicament.

$Those damned cellphone cameras.  They're everywhere these days.

And give the twins some more serious motivation for revenge. You know, this 
chapter does have a very good moral though:

Guys should not try to force themselves on militant lesbians that know 
martial arts.

Despite the twin�s
efforts, the photos were widely circulating around. Everyone whispered
behind Link�s back, and would shut up whenever she came around. Already
she was talking about moving to another village once their mission of
righteous vengeance was complete.

$Poor Link.  Filial responsibility versus removing the greatest
impediment to life and happiness in her life.  Damned if you do, tied up
and magic markered if you don't.

Heh

Pink still had no idea why that bitch Joketsuzoku had done such a thing
to Link. Okay, maybe it had something to do with Pink ambushing Shampoo
first, knocking her out, then dumping her unconscious body over a nearby
waterfall, leaving her for dead. But she had it coming. When Pink had
found her boyfriend, Li sporting two black eyes and sore ribs, she
demanded to know what happened. He informed Pink that the Amazon had
come onto him, and when he politely explained that he already had a
girlfriend, she beat him up for resisting her advances. Such an action
could never be forgiven. Pink was perfectly justified in her actions.

$Like I said, you write Pink's bizarre POV entirely too well.

Sadly, this is experience talking here. Sadly, I know women whose minds 
would work in similar fashion.

down, discovering the Joketsuzoku had fled to Japan to escape the twins
wrath (although Pink wasn�t sure how she knew they were coming, since
they had been secretive about their plans and had not encountered
Shampoo since that fateful day), but there could be no evading their
righteous vengeance. They would track her down to the ends of the earth,
should the need arise.

$Though, seeings how the earth has no ends, it's a pretty empty promise.

Heh

�Well, if you�re determined to go, let me get you something?� He walked
over to a nearby desk and began rummaging around in a drawer.

Link rolled her eyes. �What is it, a magic charm to ward off evil 
spirits?�

�Heck no. That wouldn�t do you any good.�

$Snerk.

At least he's honest

The old man gave a triumphant
cry. He began producing tee shirts, caps and books. On the shirt could
be clearly read, �I went to Mt. Terror and all I got was this lousy tee
shirt and death.�

$Heheheh.  I want one of those.

But if you were walking around wearing it, it reads false. You need to find 
it on a dead body. Then it's perfect. :)

�Wow! The old man wasn�t kidding about there being weird plants up here.
I haven�t seen any of these species in my life.� Link whistled
appreciatively. Apparently the old man knew at least partially what he
was talking about. There was indeed a crater at the top of the mountain;
a really deep one whose bottom couldn�t be seen. The only evidence there
was a bottom was the evil-looking red glow that emanated up from it
somewhere. If Link had been irrational, she could honestly believe it
led into some demon�s realm. Except there was no such thing as demons.
But if there were, they�d probably come from a place with a red glow
like that.

$I always kinda assumed they came from a meticulously etched chalk
circle with runes drawn in the blood of unrepentant sinners arrayed
around the edges.  Maybe I'm doing this wrong.

Probably.

The rocky ground surrounding the crater was mostly bare, but where
vegetation did grow, it tended to be exotic and of a variety Link had
never seen before. Some of them were kind of familiar, as if one took
some regular plants into a hall of mirrors, and decided to grow the
distortions that had been reflected from the surfaces.

$Nice line.

Thanks. I'm not much with similes and metaphors. I am going to experiment 
with them in a VP Miyu one shot.

�This is probably some corporation�s illegal dumping ground for toxic
waste and they use the old story for a cover,� Link mumbled to herself.
What she wouldn�t give to be an attorney at this moment.

$What, she wants to be invited in?

More like a Class Action and getting a cut of the action.

Link was still mulling over class actions law suits, and becoming
aroused,

$*raises eyebrow*

It's to highlight that she's evil deep down inside as well. ^_^

when Pink shouted out, �Hey, look here. Doesn�t this plant
remind you of Li?�

�What, it�s a lying Casanova that can only trick deluded morons into
believing he�s faithful to them?� Link said.

�How could a plant be something like that?� Pink asked.

$I guess it's not really like Li after all.

Heh

Link rolled her eyes. �What is it anyway?� She asked drew close enough
to see what her sister had been talking about. She had discovered a
plant that was shaped like a flower would, except instead of some
brightly colored petals, it had a very, very phallic shape to it. From
the helmet shape to veins running down the sides of its extremely thick
step the slit at the top, there was no mistaking what it looked like.

$Oh hell.  Link shouldn't have been getting aroused.  Plants are
sensitive to chemical triggers.

Wouldn't be much of a story then, though.

�Don�t touch it!� Link cried out.

It was too late as the plant extended itself, wrapping itself around
Pink�s wrist several times. She tried drawing it back, but impossibly,
the plant resisted her attempts to remove it by pulling it out of the
ground, despite her impressive martial artist�s strength.

Link�s hand went to her belt knife. She had only just cleared the blade

>from its scabbard when several of the plants shot out of the ground,

wrapping themselves around her wrists and her ankles. Panicked, the
knife slipped from her grasp and fell to the ground.

$Knife: I don't know about you, but I'm getting the fuck outta here
before I get raped, too.
Seriously, the way that's worded makes it seem like the knife is the one
panicing.

Hmm. Okay

It was then the plants revealed the source of their strength as the
roots began to pull up from the ground. They proved long as they ripped
through the buried earth in long lines, as though they were vines rather
than flowers. The ground tore up in violent upheavals until all of the
plants revealed that had originated from a common source: a large plant
that was easily two meters thick and five high. It was capped by a large
head, shaped like a Venus fly trap.

$Or a big set of lips.

Not wuite

for her own ends, now one was going to use her.

$In her own end, no less.

Oui

As Link felt the plant�s stems start to play across her pussy through
her panties,

$As I said, she should have been more careful about getting aroused near
a hellish gate to the netherworld.  Those things have very acute senses
of smell.

one thought overwhelmed her mind: This thing would have
been perfect to use against Shampoo.

$Whee!  Been wanting to write some silly pseudo tentacle porn/parody
stuff myself.  This is probably going to be a riot, especially since
Pink and Link are definitely going to blame Shampoo again.

You'll see. I have actually included a bit of the plot in this chapter, and 
more hints will be dropped. It'll all become obvious in retrospect, 
methinks.

Coming soon (as soon as I write more, that is) But I wanted folks to
know I was working on this one once again.

$Been a little while.  Good to see the promise of more.  Lemons seem
scarce on this list as of late, it's actually kinda intimidating.

Not much in the way of comments, but according to hit counters, they get the 
most readers. Ironic, isn't it? :)

 I've

got some new material myself but I don't know if this list is the best
place to put it.

Do the scattergun effect. Put it out everywhere and see what happens. I 
resign myself to little return commentary on lemons when I do them, so it's 
easier to handle.

Thanks again for the help. About 1/3 of the way done with the chapter. 
Depending on Real Life, we'll see how much more gets done in the near 
future.

DB Sommer

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