The Eternal Lost Lurker wrote:

~Something Fishy~

"Yay! I can't believe all of the new things they have here this year!"

Chiyo

cried out in delight as she took in all of the exotic sights and sounds

that

surrounded her and her companions.

"There's the Durex Mascot! And the grow-your-own-dildo booth! And the
Vibrating Horsies!"

No, not that sort of fic. >_<

With lightning fast quickness, Yukari's net flashed into the water,

catching

a fish without breaking the thin gauze. The barker gave her a small bowl
with water in it to hold the fish.

A bowl...? Don't they usually use plastic bags for this? </nitpick>

You're right, but I need Yukari to have quick access to the fish in order
for the joke to work, so bowl it is.

"Mr. Tadakichi Two," Osaka suggested. "Because he looks so much like Mr.
Tadakichi."

Everyone stared at her, including the fish.

And the reader.

Osaka sees things in a unique perspective is all.

it

to drop into her maw. There was a gulping sound, then Yukari looked back

at

the others. "See? I haven't lost my touch. I could handle ten of them,

no

problem."

;_;

I never cared much for goldfish. Everyone I knew that had them would have
the little things die pretty quick.

*snip Chiyo's fortune*

You know, it actually took me two read-throughs to get the joke there. I'm
so used to Chiyo's being a child-prodigy that I forgot not everyone is

aware

of this. Very nice, very subtle.

It comes up every now and then in the series.

Sakaki's heart leapt into her throat. "Do you mean I don't have a

future?"

"I mean there are so many scars on your palm, I can't see your lines. Do

you

handle broken glass on a daily basis or something?"

I saw that coming, but it was still funny. :)

I was tempted to have him look over her palm and say something like "You
should get into either taxadermy of big game hunting. You deserve to have
some measure of revenge for all the suffering you've had to go through.'

"What did he say?" Chiyo prodded.

"I should wear gloves more often."

XD

Nice thick chain mesh ones.

Osaka sat down. As the Seer grabbed her hand, she said, "Did you know I

can

read palms, too?"

Oh dear.

Nah, she's good at it.

Osaka held out her hand.

"What?" he asked.

"I get two hundred yen for reading your palm, just like the sign says."

Daaaaaaaamn. XD

She does have a point.

"I read his palm while I was there. Apparently he's going to be shot

down

in

the near future

I only got THAT on the second read-through too. VERY SNEAKY. ^_^

Heh. It's one of those things that might not be obvious the first time
around.

"I want you to go in with me."

"How come?"

"If he gives you a bad future, I might not want to hear mine," Tomo
explained as she forced Yomi to enter the tent.

For some reason, that seems almost logical.

Tomo skirts logic sometimes.

This time the seer didn't bother with any showmanship. He simply held

her

offered hand and began reading her palm. "I see that you are suffering

under

a terrible weight, as though a great burden has been set upon your
shoulders."

*

Izumiya held her hand. "I see that you are a great burden."

*dies laughing*

Well, from a certain perspective...

Osaka stopped Tomo. "Let me read your palm, and we'll compare

predictions."

Tomo did as she was asked.

Osaka read her palm. "I see that you are a great burden."

XD!!

As much as I pick on Tomo, I like her. I wouldn't be able to do half my
jokes if she wasn't such a troublemaker. :)

"Shouldn't you be looking at my palm when you're saying that?" Nyamo

asked.

"Oh, of course." Izumiya tore his eyes away from hers

At least he wasn't staring at her tits.

True.

Izumiya closed his eyes and furrowed his brow, as though he was
concentrating deeply. "It's... it's your only chance. After you have

left

the festival, you must call 555-6161. Only then will you discover your
soulmate."

Clever pickup line. NOT. XD

A pity he can't see he's doomed to fail before he's begun.

"Oh?" Izumiya said. "Perhaps she has a chance at salvation, too."

"I'll send her in."

oh GOD this'll be rich XD

He does have it coming.

"So, what do you think he's going to say about Miss Yukari?" Chiyo

asked.

A resounding, "AAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!" emerged from the tent.

XD)))))))))))))))

Wouldn't you if you met a Yukari and had almost hit on her? :)

Izumiya stomped out of the tent, his very form radiating unrestrained

anger.

His eyes settled on Nyamo, and he pointed an accusatory finger at her.

"You!

How dare you try to foist that, that, that... thing upon me!"

I call it "justice".

"Hey, she's all right, once you get to know her," Nyamo defended.

"No, she only gets worse once you get to know her. Take it from me, I

can

tell."

*snrk*

She does too. :(

"What about my future?" Kagura protested.

"I don't know, and I don't care!" Izumiya snapped as he reentered the

tent,

throwing the curtain shut behind him.

Someone's being a very poor sport.

Osaka will pinch hit. :)

Osaka's eyes moved back and forth over Kagura's hand as though she were
reading a book. Eventually, she said, "Wow, an entire baseball team."

There

was a hint of awe in her voice.

O_o

Of course, that's so vague it could mean anything.

Osaka blinked, as though she suddenly realized Kagura was there. She

laughed

hesitantly. "Nevermind."

o.O

"No, really, what did you mean 'an entire baseball team'?"

"Some things are best left unknown," Osaka said sagely, then released
Kagura's hand and walked away.

H_H

But I see the conclusion you've come up with. :)

Kagura stared at her back in distress. "What was it about me and a

baseball

team you saw?" She began following the dreamy girl, begging and pleading

for

answers the entire time.

#X_X#

Tomo snapped her fingers. "Shoot! I always lose control during the

release.

I guess you can call me, 'Wild Thing'," she quipped to the others.

"We'll be calling you 'Broken Arm Thing' once Yomi gets her wind back,"
Kagura said.

Heh.

She would have it coming.

The barker gave Kagura a warm smile. "Congratulations, Little Lady. You

won

the grand prize, just like the sign says." He handed her the prize.

There

was one slight problem with it.

"This is Chiyo-chan." Kagura pointed out as she held Chiyo up from under

the

smaller girl's arms, just like the barker had handed her to him.

O_o;;

he is about to raise a good point about it.

"But she's by far the cutest thing you've ever laid eyes on, and like

the

sign says, I have to give you the cutest thing you've ever laid eyes on.

So

there you go."

Man, talk about your grade-A cons...

As Kagura and the barker began arguing back and forth, Sakaki blushed as

she

had a brief fantasy of winning a Chiyo-chan of her own, and wondered if

she

could ask the barker if she could play again.

And they thought Osaka was the one who needed a reality check...

Sakaki fantasizes often as well.

Tomo moved to the head of the group. She told the others, "Obviously

from

this man's accent, he is American. Allow me to take care of this."

Oh hell.

Yes, that would be a good way to phrase it.

"I shall open this conversation with a standard English greeting," Tomo
informed the others as she walked up to the man. She turned her full
attention to him and boldly said, "Voulez-vous coucher avec moi, ce

soir."

*FACEFAULT*

Recycling humor can be fun too. :)

"Oh." A knowing light flashed in Tomo's eyes. She pondered the matter

for

a

moment, then said, "I still think he was rude. He didn't even think

about

sleeping with me for a second before running off."

*double facefault* X_x

I know women like this, though.

"But what if it was a cute tattoo? A really cute one of something

like...

Necoconeco. Wouldn't that make the person cuter, especially if they

were...

fierce-looking?"

Chiyo scratched her head. "Well, I guess maybe it would then. Why do you
ask?"

"I was just wondering" Sakaki said as she scratched at her breast, a

slight

blush entering her cheeks.

*snrk* Cute.

*snippage*

Nice touch with Osaka and Kagura.

*snippage*

Also a nice touch with Sakaki being afraid of heights.

Thanks. The line about her height was kind of the inspiration for her
phobia.

The girls were just about to call it a night when they stopped in front

of

a

curious looking machine. The top part held the upper half of a

mannequin,

adorned in robes appropriate for a court magician, in a glass case. The
lower part had a slot for money and a place where something could be
dispensed. The exterior was surrounded with hearts and in hot pink

lettering

it said, "Magus, the Love Predictor."

Uh-oh.

But it is always bad news, isn't it?

Osaka picked it up and read it aloud. "'There is no romantic problem so
great that a boob job can't make it better'." Osaka looked down at her
chest, or lack thereof, then back at the card. "Whoa, that's some

seriously

good advice."

Someone's been playing with the Osaka simulator. :P

Not familiar with that one

Chiyo tried her luck. She read the card she was given. "'Strike while

the

iron is hot before time robs you of your youth and looks'."

So she has a good what, fifteen years' window of opportunity?

Yes, only some of these cards are on the mark.

"Ha! That sounds like Nyamo's card," Yukari giggled.

"We are the same age, you know," Nyamo said in a dry voice.

Yukari's giggles died.

Ha!

She finally outsmarted herself.

Chiyo looked to the others. "I'm not in danger of losing my looks, am

I?"

Tomo considered that, "I was just saying to Yomi that I think you look

more

like one of those troll dolls with the funny hair that sticks up every

day."

XO

As inappropriate a comparison as I could come up with.

Tomo said, "So, you want to start making out or what?"

"Hell no!"

*snickers* Very nice. :)

Thanks.

Sakaki took her turn. Silently she read to herself, "For all of your
exceptional abilities, expect karma to even things out as you'll have a
normal romantic life." Sakaki scratched her head, trying to figure out

what

was exceptional about her.

Awww.

Just because she can't see it doesn't make it true. :)

Nyamo tauntingly waved the card in front of her. "It says here romance

is

no

problem for me since I'm a babe magnet. Hahaha..." Her laughing suddenly
died off and she read the card again. "Wait a minute. 'Babe magnet'?"

*SNRK*

And a guy magnet too, given her fan clubs. :)

Still smirking, Yukari put a coin in the slot and read her card. "Mine

says,

'Yeah, right. Stop wasting my time and yours'." Her eyebrow began

twitching

madly. "Why you worthless piece of crap!" She threw the card on the

ground

and began stomping on it.

*dies laughing* It's so true!

I think that someday she will come across someone desperate and deluded
enough to propose.

The youth suddenly shouted out, "Yes! I won the grand prize. A million
dollars a year for life! Wahoo!" He began dancing around, shouting out

in

glee as he waved a ticket of some kind around.

Naturally.

Yep/

[END FIC] Not much of a bang to end it on, but that's sort of the

problem

with vignettes. They just end. Thanks for reading.

Thanks for writing. It was, as usual, very much fun to read. ^_^

Glad  you enjoyed it. It was fun to write.

DB Sommer



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