Already went over this once before, so I might not comment on large sections
of it:

David Dee wrote:

----

Ishi Takashi, when introduced to attractive women at
parties, usually gave his profession as "monetary
distribution agent".

This was a fancy way of saying "thief",

wouldn't it be 'redistribition' then?

which is
precisely

which 'was' (I think)

"Just hand me the money,"Ishi

need a space there

 explained, in a slow,

calm voice. "There's no need to try anything heroic."

That was when the arrow shot past, inches away from
his face, and buried itself in the wall behind
him. "There's ALWAYS a need to try something heroic!"

Heh

shouted a clear, high female voice. Ishi turned.
Ishi gulped. He was definitely not in any condition to

take on a superhero.

and getting odd line breaks here

Hellcat pouted in a rather sulky fashion. "Yes!"

Heh.

"Oh, no!"Son of Satan shouted in mock horror. "Now he
knows yer one of the million or so girls in Japan
called Kagome! Whatever shall we do?"

I doubt she operates far from home, so figureing out her identity wouldn't
be that difficult.

mentioned' rule of yours,"laughed Inu-Yasha. "Man,
why'd I ever agree to this...?"He began to walk away.

"Hey! Don't you walk out on me!"shouted Kagome.

and I'm assuming the lack of space in quotes is also a program compatablity
thing.

"I'll

remind you who's got the upper hand here!"

Tell him to 'Sit!'

"Right, right..."muttered Inu-Yasha, walking away.

"Umm, excuse me..."interjected Ishi.

"Oh you keep out of this!"Kagome stated
forcibly. "You're not worried, Inu-Yasha? Not worried
in the slightest that I'll say, si-"

Heh

A blissful smile appeared on Kagome's face. "It's the
way of the superhero, who strongly respects life
enough to bludgeon people into unconsciousness,
instead of simply killing them."

Inu-Yasha narrowed his eyes. "Right."

Hey, I'd rather be bludgeoned than killed.

A snore confirmed his guess. His apprentice was
asleep. Standing up.

You learn to do that when studying ancient secrets.

"My throne room."

room,"

"I found it in a canvas sack that had been buried six
feet beneath the ground, under a rock,"replied the
Ancient One.

It gets around

The Ancient One next pulled out a very large
crystal ball. "And this is the Orb of Agomotto!
Using it, you will discover the location of mystic
threats to this world. In time, you will learn to
use it to spy on any time, place, or dimension
you desire."He tossed it at Hikaru, who missed
it, and fell to the ground with a gasp as it
struck him straight on in the chest.

Heh

In a place that really could say it wasn't
a place but a state of mind, IT stirred.
There was something IT wanted.
Something IT needed.

Stephen King to write a story about IT, perhaps?

Hikaru stood out on the deck of the ship that
was taking him to Tokyo. He took a deep
breath, enjoying the salty air. This was, he
thought, the first time he'd ever been on a
ship, and not been violently ill. He liked to
think it was a symbol

'sigh' or 'omen' not symbol

Still-he was starting an adventure.

All of life is an adventure. His is simply going to be more adventuresome
than most.

An

insane, horrific adventure that probably

would probably

"Certainly,"said Matsumoto graciously,
always ready to help his fellow man. The
old man handed him a rather thin bit of
yellow parchment with a very unpleasant
texture to it. Matsumoto cleared his throat
and began. "I invoke thee, oh three-mouthed
render of souls. Ku-ku-ku..."

"I believe the word is 'Kuthargn',"offered
the old man. "It means 'to tear asunder
with great force' in the Elder tongue."

Heh. Nice way to gain dupes

He was just entering Nerima proper
when he heard a familiar voice. "Heh.
It's the freak."

These folks are about to be in for a surprise.

Hikaru felt a sudden an urge to roll
up into a ball and vanish but

vanish, but

Hikaru sighed. Great. Now, not only did
he have an overwhelming advantage, he
actually felt sympathy for his opponent,
who was really just a said

sad

Hikaru took a deep breath. He had to be
careful in what he told her-no one could
suspect the truth. "Oh, fine,"he began. "I
faced off against a powerful demonic wizard,
and became apprenticed to a sorcerer."Hikaru
buried his face in his palm. Oh, crap. That was
a mistake. He needed to move the conversation
along quickly. He recalled Akane mentioning a
trip to him once...

"So how was Norway?"

"Nice,"replied a smiling Akane. "I defeated a
bunch of invading stone aliens, and assumed
the power of the Goddess of Thunder."

It's nice to share one's burdens with others. ^_^

Inu-Yasha groaned. "Kagome-I-I just
don't wanna be a superhero. It seems like a
waste of time."

So what career choice does he want? Wandering youkai? It pays even less
well. :)

Kagome glanced at him, scandalized. "WEIRD!"
 she said, waving her scissors around. "I defy

shouldn't it be 'dare' rather than 'defy'?

*Well,* thought Hikaru, *that's four hours killed. Now

I've got to worry about the slow destruction of the
world's
protective barriers before an insidious onslaught of
demonic invaders...*  He sighed. *I think I'll worry
about my costume for a little while longer...*

So would I

Otherwise he was afraid he might be mistaken
for a pimp wearing that damn Cloak of Levitation,

Heh

something his sallow complexion and limited
physique would only act to confirm. Hikaru was
not going to be booked on an ethics charge.

Not again.

Doubl heh

Hikaru turned to his dresser. Fortunately he was
prepared for this eventuality. He snapped on a
domino mask, then glanced back at the mirror.

He should have gone for the Dr. Strange blue mask he wore before his first
title was canceled.

It appeared that this was his-best option. He
sighed. Well, if any of his classmates saw him,
he'd just pretend not to know them. After all,
what chance was there of them automatically
recognizing a ghastly pale young man wearing
a distinctive outfit?

He could probably use a spell to make it so they can't remember what he
looks like as well.

IT felt pleasure at these thoughts. In the
past, IT would not be capable of such
planning. IT would be wild and heedless
and slay until IT was stopped. But things
were different this time. IT felt-calmer.
 More in control. This time, the conditions
were just right. And not just for IT.

No, for all ITs old friends as well.

Heh. That would be bad.

Cross scowled. "Right."He hated Henry. The
Expositions were a big family in SHIELD

Jasper Stillwell would get along fine with them then

once made the mistake of comparing the Crown
Prince's wife to a bratwurst."Henry coughed at
that, then continued. "Randolph's pamphlet interested
one Edmund Fitzroy, a wealthy English financier, who
purchased the shard, and an hour later, was hit by a
cart, which dragged his body twenty three miles,
before crashing in a ditch."

So it's a cursed item, it is.

Not even they had imagined that this trouble
might take the form of being pulled into an
alleyway by a creature that looked like a
combination of spider, an octopus, and bit
of rotting food that'd been in the refrigerator
far too long, but this was mostly due to a
lack of imagination on their parts.

Yeah

"Count Dracula!"Yuka cried. She rushed
towards him, craning her neck at a very
odd angle. "Have you come to make me one
of your unholy brides?"

Horribly enough, Fangs does exist here and would if she caught his fancy.

Hikaru began to nervously tap his fingers
together. "I'm not a vampire."He cleared
his throat, and glanced around. "Actually,
the whole blood-sucking thing always struck
me as unhygienic..."

Being undead means disease doesn't harm you. It also means you burn up in
sunlight. This is not a good trade off, IMO.

"Are you sure you're not a vampire?"Yuka asked,
ignoring him. She glanced over again. "Or maybe
a zombie?"

Simon Garth looked much, much worse.

Hikaru paused. Apparently she thought his
confused strugglings for a name and his
statement of puzzlement were directly connected.
He turned the name over in his head. Dr. Strange.
Pretty good actually.

And the first guy to have it was a horrible one shot villain whom Iron Man
took out back when he wore bulky yellow armor.

Man, I'm a Marvel Nerd when it comes to their comics. :)

OH, said the entity, a general feeling unease
coming from its thoughts, before being masked
once again by bravado and boasting. LISTEN
WELL, MORTAL, FOR I AM HE-WHO-
DWELLS-IN-DARKNESS.

Hmm. The Dweller did cause problems every now and then. And he actually
manipulated Nightmare and D'Spayre into catspaws, which is quite the
accomplishment.

About five minutes later, Hikaru exited
 the anomaly, and completed the job
of closing it. "That was underwhelming."
He rubbed his eyes. "Oh, great. I think
the lighting in there gave me a headache..."
And so, Hikaru Gosunkugi strode out into
the night, looking for a 24 hour drugstore
that sold cheap aspirin.

Heh

Inu-Yasha considered saying no, but really
couldn't let Kagome down like that. "Sure.
Hurray for niceness. Wooh."

"Right!"cried Kagome. "To the Hellcat-Cycle!"

The Hellcat-Cycle had been just 'Kagome's bicycle'

Hahaha!

Or perhaps, he appended, it was all
the mockery his outfit was attracting
as he paused to get refreshed at an
all-night caf�.

He really needs to learn illusary spells. Hell. Strange used them to allow
the Hulk to move around normally among society.  Now that takes effort.

The crowd continued to pointedly
glance away.

That would be for the best.

"HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Well, night
owls, prepare for a stick-up of the most
figurative kind! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"

Oh, this is going to be fun.

Hikaru blinked. Then he blinked again, to
make sure he wasn't hallucinating. Then
he blinked a third time, in the desperate
hope that he was.

The blinking thing has happened to me.

"Oh, really?"snorted the villain. "And
tell me, Doctor are you ready to face
the uncanny power of-PASTE-POT
PETE?!!"

Sadly, Stan thought this was a good name for two issues before he returned
to his senses and dubbed PPP the Trapster, though people still give him a
hard time about it.

Secondly, his impromptu costume of an
artist's smock and dark glasses topped off by
kicky beret just didn't seem to grab people's
attention, at least, not in a way that screamed
'supervillain'.

Sweet. That was the true PPP look. :)

"Shut up!"said Hikaru forcibly. He
glanced back at the crowd. "Come on!
He's a scrawny young man who is trying
 to hold you up with a glue gun! Am I the
only one here who realizes the inherent
absurdity of this fact?"

Never been hit with the stuff, I see. It can bind nearly anyone and
anything.

"Yes, I'm insulting you because you are
probably one of the most intrinsically

 incompetent supervillains in existence,"

No. Thw Wrench, who was a normal guy in coveralls who went around with a
normal wrench was the worst. Blowtorch Brand was a step above that because
he was a mutant that could at least control the fire that eminated from his
normal blowtorch. The Ringer, with his giant rings was godawful, but at
least versitile. Sadly, there were two of them. Same with Steeplejack and
his rivet gun as well.

"And why would that be threatening?"Hikaru
asked quietly.

He looses a few layers of skin to get it off.

"Of course not,"Cross stated uncertainly.
"The cause of peace demands it. I know that."

The cause of peace had in fact demanded
that SHIELD build some of the most
terrifyingly deadly and destructive weapons
in the world, thus serving it by reducing the
number of pesky living people who could be
at times less than peaceable.

Actually, I don't think they made all that many. Some dangerous isotopes,
perhaps, but not much else. The Overkill Horn they used on Skull Island was
actually a stolen Hydra invention. The Yellow Claw's flying dragon was built
by the 'yellow menace' when it was stolen from their custody. Hmm. Battle
suits like the Bi-Beast used are too low scale for global problems. The
Deltites were an abberation, since SHIELD has used LMDs hundreds of times to
useful effect. They did have problems with the Helicarrier being taken over
every once and a while.

At that moment a large vehicle that looked
like a corkscrew on wheels burrowed out
of the ground. A group of men and women
wearing rather bulky brown environmental
suits topped by funnel-shaped helmets
emerged.

yellow, or blue. They never used brown

"Oh give it a rest, science boy!"muttered
a HYDRA member. "Everyone knows you
AIM flunkies are useless in a fight."

Which was why they used to make hordes of andriods to do their fighting for
them.

Another member grabbed him lightly
by the shoulder. "Let it go, Dwight."

"I'm sorry,"he muttered. "It just really,
REALLY annoys me when they make
fun of MODOK like that..."

In MODOK's defence, he's fought damn near everyone. He even returned from
genuine death once, thanks to the Cosmic Cube

"Sadly,"said a quiet voice, "you are all
wrong."The HYDRA and AIM agents
turned. A group of ninjas emerged from
the shadows. "The U-ray has been claimed
by the Hand, whose reach is as-"

Heh.

The other criminals grumbled in agreement. Zodiac
was one of the most universally resented gangs in
the criminal underworld. On the one hand, they got
their hands on more technology, and loot then most
other crime syndicates even dreamed of. On the
other hand, such things were soon wasted on
Byzantine plots that didn't even make much sense.

Depends on which version. The first were mostly underpowered human with
almost no powers that were thankfully killed to the man, except maybe
Liebra. Aries I was the only one that actually used thugs, and he died after
doing it. The second incarcation were robots that had no need of humans,
except Scorpio. The third though, yeah, no one knows what their true goal
even is, and they did use  a small army of thugs once.

It was a large truck, with a rather tasteless
picture of a beautiful woman cradling a bowling
pin. A group of scowling men in purple and
green bodysuits with a patch showing a bowling
ball striking a pin on their foreheads emerged
from it. Finally a man clad in what appeared to
be mechanized body armor stepped out. "I am
Hardstrike. My men and I make up the ideological
organization known as Stick and Balls."

Heh.

Hikaru began to massage his forehead.
He was really starting to wonder what
 this job was going to do to his health
even if he did manage to avoid being
eaten by something out of an H.R. Giger
picture

True, or from Ditko's art deco look.

"We are professionals,"said Kagome. "Professional
good guys."

True. They've killed a lot of demon in their time.

Inu-Yasha fell forwards with enough
force to unbalance Hikaru, who fell
backwards with a few feet away from
the half demon. His falling also tore
loose Tetsaiga. The blade soared briefly
in the air, then fell to the ground, where,
Hikaru could not help but note, it landed
only inches away from wiping out the
existence of the Gosunkugi family name
in all future generations.

Heh

The look on Inu-Yasha's face
made it clear he didn't think much
of her logic.

But she's right, and those are sensible reasons.

Hikaru glanced around. Something was
wrong, and he had an awful idea what it
was. "That's nice,"he said absently.

Oh?

"He covered me in SCORPIONS!"

"Not really,"pointed out Kagome. "He
just made you think you were. Which
makes it your fault."

Heh

Hikaru nodded. "When trying to apprehend
a deadly superweapon powered by evil magic,
do not fight your fellow heroes so that villains
can get away with said deadly superweapon."

Kagome mused on this. "Doesn't seem like
that will happen too often..."

"Oh, once is enough,"muttered Hikaru, as
he looked at the back of the SHIELD van,
where the U-ray was only conspicuous in
its absence.

Yep, that would do it.

-----

"Hurry my men!"shouted Hardstrike. "We
must not allow our magnificent Stick and Balls
to be defeated!"

I see the biggest morons of all got it as well

"For before you stands an ancient
spirit of destruction..."stated the
second mouth.

"Quiver at your lord mortals,"chortled
the third mouth. "Quiver at the presence
of-MR. WIGGLESWORTH!"

Remember, demons are given names, they don't actually choose them.

The third mouth almost seemed to
shrug. "Well, it's not like they can
even comprehend our true name, so
I thought, why not Mr. Wigglesworth?"

Oh, my bad.

Hikaru had finally reached Kagome and Inu-Yasha.
"All right. Plan A: Blow the monster into fiery
cinders
was a failure, so I'm going to suggest we start on
Plan B."

"What's that?"Kagome said eagerly.

"Run like hell."

Always an option.

"Dr. Strange!"she shouted cheerfully.

Hikaru threw up on her shoes.

Heh

About a minute later, Hikaru was cleaning
off her shoes with a hasty magick, and
apologizing. "Teleporting unbalances my
stomach, and..."

"It's all right,"Kagome said cheerfully.
"After all, how many people can say
they've been vomited on by a superhero?"

Who'd want to?

Kagome glanced at Inu-Yasha,
irritated. "Living in a shrine does
have its advantages. I had Grandpa
give me a lesson last week."

It shouldn't hurt.

Kagome gave him a grin so utterly
chipper that it not only failed to cheer
him up, but it actually made him doubt
her sanity. "Don't worry, Dr. Strange.
A superhero like you is a match for
any number of Elder Gods."

Well, she's probably right. He just doesn't realize it yet.

Hikaru blinked. "What?"

Heh. He has this one coming.

The three mouths screamed in unison.
It was, Hikaru realized, the first time
they'd all said exactly the same thing.

Heh. Irony

"Umm, Kagome,"Inu-Yasha said
quietly, "I think he was sayin' that
to you."

Kagome seemed about to reply to that
when she noticed Hikaru was falling
face-forward.

Not bad for his first night on the job.

A part of Hikaru felt like saying,
*'Look, I'm just as confused and
clueless as you are. I just hide it
better.'* But he didn't. He at least
owed the girl her illusions. "I-
prefer to work alone."That was
definitely the truth. Hikaru just
wasn't terribly fond of people.

Only because to date no people have been terribly fond of him.

"But we can help you!"said Kagome
anxiously. "We did last night!"

*Out of mess

Out of the mess

you pretty much got me

and he got into it himself.

"Yes. Now help me out of this
tree. My cloak seems to have
gotten tangled up in it."

Heh

"There's a phone call for you,
from some girl. Says she's in
your manga club."

Hikaru felt a sinking feeling in
his stomach. "Oh. I see."

Heh. That didn't take long.

Very nice work. Look forward to reading the other chapters.

DB Sommer



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