Disclaimer: I don't own any of these characters, but I'm not trying to
make any money off this so I guess it's OK then.
This is a Ranma continuation and multi-cross-over with Sailor Moon,
Tenchi Muyo!, Mermaid Saga, Ah Megami-sama and Mamono Hunter Yohko.
This is my first time writing a fan fiction, so please review and tell
me what you think.
Ranma Crossing Over to the Wild Side
By Paul Bennett aka Shadowbakasama
Chapter 10: Engagement from Above
Up in Asgard, in the Contract Offices for the Gods, a memo was printed
out and started an uproar.
A young goddess grabbed the memo from the printer, reads it, and
exclaims. "Like the dung of the Great Wolf Fenrir, this is going to
cause a great stink in Asgard!" She yells waving the memo around and
holding her nose.
This drew the attention of Hermes, God of Messengers and Thieves, who
ran over and grabbed the memo. "Let's see what has you so excited
Sheena." He says starting to read the memo. "Hmm, 'Urgent action
required in the matter of the engagement between a daughter of Odin aka
Kami-sama and Saotome Ranma son of Saotome Genma. Reference Prayer
1989AD-OD#25436.' WAOH! Who would have though it of old 'One-Eye'!
Setting up one of his girls in an arranged marriage. HA HA HA!"
"But Lord Hermes, isn't there a clause invalidating arranged marriages
between Gods and mortals." Sheena asks suddenly worried about all the
times her father Bacchus engaged while drunk in a bar on Earth.
"That's right Sheena, that has been on the books since the Titan's were
in charge." Hermes replies. "As I recall the story, several of
Kronos's daughters were mighty upset about being married off too men
that rarely lived even 50 years and were of less than 6 feet in height.
I could see the problem of course, his youngest daughter was 300 years
old at the time and his shortest was 20 feet tall, they gathered support
from the other young Titan's, even the men since it would prevent a
forced wedding if they got some mortal maiden in the family way. It's
been enforced ever since, even by our rivals down below."
"But Lord Hermes, how does that effect Lady Belldandy's situation?"
Sheena asks.
"Well, Belldandy has a contract to fulfil a Wish. The only time she
questioned the arrangement was right at the start, and she never really
complained about it. Also the Wish never mentioned getting married,
that's up too them to decide on."
"Then shouldn't Yggdrasil have ignored this deal?"
"Well you would think so. Maybe Odin will give his girls the option to
marry this mortal, but he can't insist. The only way this could be a
problem is if this Ranma fellow is an Immortal. Then of course this
would be a done deal with little chance to get out of it. But Odin
knows better too make deals like that with other god's after all the
trouble he used to have with Loki."
"Hmm, I'll just pull up this Ranma's file." Sheena says sitting down at
her workstation and typing away. "Hmm, Saotome Ranma, son of Saotome
Genma and Masaki Nodoka, Japanese male or female?! see note 2? age 17,
height 5'9" or 5', weight 150 lbs or 105 lbs, hair color black or red,
eye color blue. All right, note 2 is a Nyanniichuan curse! He changes
into a girl when splashed with cold water with hot water returning him
to his male body."
"Poor guy, that must make his life 'interesting'." Hermes remarks,
reading over Sheena's shoulder. "Look for something that would change
his mortal status, check in his accomplishments."
"OK, lets see. Possible third in line for the Throne of the Jurai Empire."
"Hmm, that could do it if he has a Ship Tree, they extend their
partner's lifespan to over a thousand years."
"No mention of a Jurai Ship Tree. Hmm, whats this? Survived eating
'Mermaid's Flesh', whats that? I've never heard of it." Sheena asks.
"Mermaid's Flesh! Well, it's a powerful mutagenic poison. But a man
that eats it and lives becomes Immortal. Age, disease, and most poisons
have no more effect on him, and he will heal injures at an amazing rate,
even to the point of coming back from the dead in most cases." Hermes
replies. "I'll have too rush this up to Odin, it seems that one of his
girls has a fiance to track down. I don't envy him telling them about it."
Everyone cringes at telling one of the Norns that they were getting
married to someguy.
Sheena calls up Ranma's ID picture and gets a split screen with boy and
girl Ranmas side by side and exclaims. "Wow! He's buff! and his girl
form is a hottie!"
"Urd may not complain when she sees this."
"Urd?! Why her?"
"Well, Skuld is still appears too young," Hermes says, "and Belldandy is
pretty stuck on that Morisato guy. Urd looks older than him, but I
doubt he would complain. Of course, being an Immortal now, he could
also wait a few years for Skuld too be old enough if he doesn't like
Urd. But I need to get this to Odin, come on Sheena."
"Why do I need to go?"
"Because misery loves company my dear little goddess. If I suffer so
should you, so put Ranma's file on a disc and come on." insists
Hermes. "And call ahead and tell his secretary that we're coming up."
---------
Getting in to see Kami-sama wasn't too hard, Yggdrasil was running fine
and things were OK between the forces of Heaven and Hell at the moment,
and they said it was urgent business concerning a new Immortal so Ares
got bumped and rescheduled for Thursday afternoon to discuss more
advanced training for the Valkeries and Eihenhier.
As Hermes ran in dragging Sheena behind him Ares was arguing with
Kami-sama's secretary about his appointment.
"Now Ares, don't be like that." Hermes says. "This is a rather unusual
case involving family business between Odin himself and a new Immortal.
In fact you might want to hang around if you want to see Himself loose
his cool, you should be able to hear it out hear just fine."
"What's this Hermes? You got a prank in the works?" Ares asks his
fellow Greek God.
"No, just being the messenger of weird news. It should be all over the
grapevine right after this meeting." Hermes replies. "He'll never be
able to keep this one quiet."
"Nuh unh, No Way, not this one, it's too ... juicy." Sheena adds barely
controlling her snickering.
"OK, now you've got me interested, Spill it. What's going on." Ares
demands.
"Sorry. Got to tell the bossman first, but stick around and we can get
a drink after and I'll let you in on the whole story." Hermes says
putting Ares off until later.
Then seeing an angry Hera coming out of Odin's office Ares says, "I
heard that she has another 'Woman Scorned' case, something about some
Japanese girl getting her marriage ruined, fighting, bombs and
bloodshed, a real mess and Hera wants to go after the playboy groom
'Ranma' something."
"Ranma? Would that happen to be Saotome Ranma?" Sheena asks the wargod.
"Hmm, probably." Ares replies. "Saotome Ranma, yeah that's where I saw
that name. He's quite the fighter, he won a battle with Saffron and the
Pheonix Guard. A Very good martial artist, from the report I saw, he
could give her more trouble than Hercales did if she goes after him."
"Tell you what Ares, get together what you can on this Ranma and his dad
'Genma' and meet us at the mead hall over on Troubadour. This is the
biggest thing to hit Asgard since Belldandy granted that kid's wish and
got stuck down there." Hermes tells him, then. "But I've got to give
the boss the 'Bad' news. C ya. Come on Sheena."
Hermes drags Sheena into Kami-sama's office and halts infront of the
one-eyed god's desk.
"So Hermes, what's so important that you had to bump Ares's appointment,
you know how he gets." Odin says from his spot behind the desk.
"Well, better get out the mead, this news requires a toast." Hermes
says trying to keep a straight face.
Odin tries to do the eyebrow trick, but doesn't pull it off very well,
what with the eye patch and all, so he pulls out a bottle from the desk
and conjures up 3 shot glasses and pours the shots. Once they all have
a glass in hand he says, "OK, now spill it."
Hermes looks at Sheena then raises his glass to Odin, Sheena mirroring
his actions and they both say "Congradulations on the upcoming wedding
of your daughter and Saotome Ranma. Kanpei!" as they toss back they're
shots leaving Odin spewing mead from his nose.
"WHAT!!!" Odin's roar is heard all over Asgard. "HERMES! You did that
on Purpose!" Odin yells across the desk at the God of Messengers. "You
and your Fiendish sence of humor are going to get you into trouble
someday, maybe today. Now tell me what is going on."
"Heh heh heh, it was worth it. Erm hrm, well Sheena here pulled an
important memo from Yggdrasil that suggests immediate action conserning
the engagement of a 'Daughter of Odin' and a certain Saotome Ranma."
Hermes explains handing over the memo.
"Did you know that Hera was just in here wanting support for going after
this Ranma boy for jilting his bride at the alter." Seeing Hermes nod
Odin continues. "She wanted several of our top Valkeries to put him in
his place since he has reservations about hitting girls. I told her I'd
look into it and get back too her. Now your telling me that one of my
little girls is going to marry this guy! Explain."
"The memo references a prayer that you answered 5 years ago, providing
aid to a Saotome Genma." Sheena replies.
"Yes, I remember that." Odin recalls. "He was in Hamburg with his son
Ranma who was about 13. He had accepted a contract to train Wolfgang
Krausser the Third in the art of Anything Goes for a year, but when he
got to the estate he was told that the elder Wolfgang had been killed by
his own son in a fight, and the young man he was to train was a vicious
beast of a man. So he canceled the contract and ran off without
refunding the deposit. This left him broke and stranded in Germany. (He
had already spent all the money.) He prayed to me at one of the old
road-side shrines, asking for help escaping Wolfgang and leaving
Germany. He even offered to marry his son to ... one of ... My
Daughters! But! His son is a mortal, so I ignored the offer and helped
him mostly for the sake of his son. Well Hermes, you had me going
worried there for a minute. That was a well played joke. HA HA HA."
"Well, its nice to see that you can appreciate a good joke, but the fact
remains that Saotome Ranma is no longer a mortal, Thus making a Valid
Engagement since you answered that prayer." Hermes tells Odin with his
most serious tone.
Sheena adds her 2 yen, "We looked up Saotome Ranma's file and found that
he has eaten the flesh of a Mermaid and acheived Immortality. If it
makes you feel better he is quite the handsome young man and probably
isn't as bad as some people make him out to be."
"I hope not!" Odin growls, banging his head on the desk. "According to
Hera, Ranma's womanizing causes more trouble than even that of Paris."
[Note: To those how don't know. Paris was a young man who judged a
beauty contest between several Greek Goddesses, Aphrodite, Athena, and
Hera I think, he choose Aphrodite and she rewarded him by making Helen
of Troy fall in love with him. Just one problem, she was married to a
Greek King at the time, her eloping with Paris to Troy caused the Trojan
War.]
"Leave the file and tell my secretary to cancel everything else today
and tomorrow for urgent family business, it looks like I'm going to
Tokyo for a visit." Kami-sama says shooing them from his office.
Just before they escape Odin yells out, "Oh Hermes, you and Sheena need
to go find my Son-in-law and escort him to Belldandy's temple tomorrow
for lunch. GOT IT!"
---------
Ares meets up with Hermes and Sheena later at the mead hall carrying
several files, with Athena at his side. Both Hermes and Sheena have
empty mugs lined up in front of them already.
"That bad hunh?" Ares asks them.
"What? Didn't you hear?" Sheena replies.
"Everyone heard." Ares replies. "Not everyone knows the whole story
yet, maybe no ones all of it, but I found out about most of it."
"WE found most of it." Athena tells them. "Ares called me in when it
started getting too confusing for him."
"Yeah, that was about 2 minutes after I started." Ares replies. "The
poor kid's life is like a multi-train pile-up at a switching yard.
There is no way in sight of getting the mess straightened out."
"Uhm, when did you two start getting along?" Hermes asks them. "You
used to hate each other with a passion, always at each others throats."
"Hah hah, we got over our little rivalry 2,000 years ago. We just kept
it a secret, it was too both our advantage." Athena replies.
"Yeah, for one thing other gods would always try and play us off agianst
each other," Ares adds, "and expect me to be too rash and Athena too
cautious, but we would be talking to each other behind the scenes. It
worked out great for both of us."
Hermes smacked himself in the forehead, now knowing why the pair had
never really fell into his pranks. Sheena just laughed.
Ares sets opens up a file on the table while Athena starts talking.
"The first thing we looked into was any contracts with other Gods. We
found one, turns out that what Saotome Genma met your father Bacchus in
a bar one night." She addresses too Sheena.
"Oh No!" Sheena yells.
"But this happened 18 years ago, so your safe, Sheena." Ares says
laying a hand on her shoulder.
"Right, your father Bacchus, engaged your older sister Peorth to
Ranma." Athena continues. "But we think that a Demon may also have
made a contract with Genma for Ranma."
"We can only hope it was just an engagement." Ares finishes. "Other
than that it looks like Ranma is engaged to 8 Japanese girls, 4 of whom
can be considered Immortals."
"As well as five Amazon brides by combat, one of them reaffirmed by a
challenge fight in front of witnesses." Athena adds.
"Also Ranma can be considered as being Japanese, Amazon, and Juraian by
law, marriage, and birthright." Ares tells them.
"Besides now being an Immortal by the laws of Heaven and Hell." Athena
says. "By Japanese law he is in a hopeless situation, honorably engaged
to sixteen girls and only able too marry one of them."
"But all of the others allow poligamy," Ares says, "even though 16 wives
is beyond any precedent in Heaven or Hell or among the Amazons or Jurai."
"The best option we've seen so far," Athena suggests, "is for all the
brides to be accepted into the Amazon tribe and then marry Ranma, and
get they're families and the Japanese government to recognize Amazon
marriage law."
"But Amazon marriage law is savage and feminist in the extreme." Ares
explains, "With engagement by combat, and settling disputes with duels.
The husband also has many duties to his wives, and almost no rights
under Amazon law." Ares says giving Athena a dirty look.
"Hey! Don't look at me like that!" Athena yells at Ares. "I'm just
they're War God, they took after Hera for how to treat they're men,
since Artemis is still a Virgin Goddess and has no family of her own.
Look at how your Musk tribe worked out!"
"Don't blame me for that!" Ares yells back. "They would have been fine
if they hadn't found a way to lock that Nyanniichuan curse to get
brides. Anything dunked in there comes out as a full blown hottie, that
made it real easy to get into beastiality. At least they don't let the
wild mothers raise the kids. It bad enough being descended from wild
animals without being raised by them."
"HEY! Hey! Hey!" Hermes yells, interrupting the two war gods. "What
happened to you to getting along?"
"Well, we have to keep up the act, and there are still several touche
subjects that we argue about." Athena explains. "The Amazon and Musk
tribes are one of our disagreements."
"So, what are the chances of Amazon law being recognized by the
Japanese?" Sheena asks.
"Slim to none, the Chinese don't recognize Amazon independance or law."
Ares replies. "They just leave them alone and respect their cultural
diversity, but still consider them Chinese citisens."
"Why not get them married on Tougenkyo?" Athena suggests. "I bet they
can get Prince Touma to agree to whatever marriage laws they want."
"Good idea," Ares agrees sarcastically, "except for the fact that no
country recognizes Tougenkyo as a country. You can't even put it on a
map since it drifts around and it's usually hidden by illusions. So it
remains a mythical place."
"Not true." Athena replies. "All NATO and former Warsaw Pact
countries recognize Tougenkyo as an island kingdom, and some have it
charted on electronic maps for they're navies."
"Radar satellites." Ares guesses, at seeing Athena's nod he says.
"They probably sent a few warships too check it out and were able to
guide boats right to the island, even without seeing it."
"So Tougenkyo is recognized by Japan." Athena tells them. "It's just
almost completely unknown outside of a few navy chartmakers that keep
track of it in the Pacific and try to steer shipping away from it."
"Uhm, I've never even heard more than vague rumors about Tougenkyo."
Hermes says. "So how did you two find out so much about the place?"
"Heh heh, it was mentioned in Ranma's file." Ares answers him. "He's
been there, so we got curious and looked it up. Moving on, Sheena, are
you going to track down your father, Bacchus, and question him about
Peorth's engagement?"
"Why bother." Sheena replies. "Dad was drunk when he made it, and
probably didn't even remember it the morning afterwards. The daughters
of Bacchus know how he works and sometimes check our files and tease
each other about our mortal fiancees. Last I checked I had 25 fiancees,
all mortal of course, so they don't count, Peorth had 48 fiancees, Diana
had 75, and my older sisters have all topped 100, with Tiphinius having
the record at 350 fiancees, of which only 4 are still alive. I think he
sets us up more often while we are young, but he still sometimes
remembers his older daughters that are still single."
"What!" Ares roars, outraged at Bacchus making so many engagements for
his daughters. "Your only, what 13 years old, and you've already got
major fiancee problems!"
"It's not a big deal." Sheena tells him in a calm voice, not wanting
them to know that shes only 10 years old. "We just ignore it mostly,
since our fiancees are mortal we don't have to marry them, and usually
both sides don't remember the deal in the morning anyway. I think this
will be the first time that Dad has set one of us up with an Immortal,
and that's just a fluke because he ate of a mermaid's flesh. I will, of
course, tell Peorth about it when I see her tomorrow. Lucky girl,
getting an arranged engagement to the newest Immortal bachelor. Hehehe
hahaha BwuhaHAHAHA!"
-----------
Down on Earth, at a temple not far from the Nekomi Institute of
Technology, Urd was playing Uno against Skuld and Peorth for the TV
remote, Keiichi was in the garage working on a motorized skateboard, and
Belldandy was cooking up a masterpiece in the kitchen when the phone
started ringing.
Skuld put down her cards and answered the phone before Belldandy could
get out of the kitchen. "Mushi mushi. ... Hello Otousama, it's nice to
hear from you too. ... No everything is fine here, Urd hasn't caused
'too' much trouble lately. ... ... We're going to have company coming
over for lunch tomorrow. How many? ... At least four, but you figure
more will show up. ... Ten! ... And several big eaters, I'll tell her.
... You want all of us here. What about Peorth, shes down here on
vacation. ... Great! Hermes is bringing Sheena down. I haven't seen
her since I've been down here. I'll be sure and tell her. ... We'll be
ready. Ja ne Otousama."
All the other goddesses had gathered around to listen in.
"OK squirt, what's wrong this time?" Urd asks.
"He didn't mention anything being wrong," Skuld answers, "but he also
didn't say 'why' we are having company tomorrow. He mentioned that
Hermes was going to bring Sheena down and escort a guest here, and that
some of his friends might come along with him. And that there might be
'other' uninvited guests, but that we are to try and avoid fighting with
them."
"Oh my." says Belldandy [What? Were you expecting it to be Kasumi?]
"Well it sounds like I'll have to do some shopping tonight. So Urd,
what's your mother's favorite food?"
"Right, we can probably expect Hild and Mara to drop in 'uninvited'. I
know she likes chocolate cake. They made up Devil's Food Cake for her
sweet tooth." Urd tells her.
"I wonder why Uncle Hermes is bringing Sheena-imoutochan with him?"
Peorth asks.
"I heard that Sheena has been hanging around the Contract Office where
he has been working recently." Skuld tells her. "Excuse me, I have to
go outside for something."
Skuld walks out behind the house and stands still looking up into the
sky when a bright beam of light reaches down from the sky to the goddess
mark on her forehead. Skuld seems to be growing up and filling out
while in the beam of light. When the light stops Skuld walks back
inside and is only a couple inches shorter than Urd and looks like a 17
year old hottie.
"Wha.. wha.. what is this for?!" Urd asks her not so little anymore sister.
"Uhm, well, Kami-sama said he didn't think it was fair for me too look
so young considering who is coming over." Skuld explains. "He said it
would give all the other girls too much of an advantage over me, so I
figure our important guest must be a guy."
"Oooh Skuld, for Kami-sama to do this, the guy must be a prospective
boyfriend or something." Peorth says teasing Skuld while eyeing her
up. "Why, you look good enough to give me and Urd some competition."
"Yeah, thats the idea I got too." Skuld says, sticking her chest out
and doing a bust check with Peorth and Urd. "Well, they may not be as
big, but I think I look cuter than you guys."
"Uh oh, you think 'we' are going to be compeating against each other for
some guy?" Urd says pointing at herself, Peorth, and Skuld.
"Yep, but I think that it goes beyond that." Skuld replies. "Why else
would he mention him maybe bringing 'friends' and expecting uninvited
guests to drop in. For some reason I think this is going to be
'complicated'."
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