Ohh. Another one of these.

"MYSTERY SCIENCE THEATER 6.7"  (SEASON FIVE)

EPISODE 41: THE LIGHT OF MY HOPES PT. 1

(A Sailor Moon/Escaflowne/Gundam Wing/Card Captor Sakura/Fushigi
Yuugi/Dragon Ball Z Crossover MSTing)

And right there you knew you had a winner, didn't you, Meg?

     "You wish, Fembot!"  Tom snapped.

     "Hey, settle down, guys!"  Joel admonished.  "I'll go first... my
chindogu is for people who like to look cool in public but find sunglasses
too cumbersome for their personal tastes.  They're shades for contact
lenses!"

Yep. Chindogu, all right

button.  One of the SAMs fired off a tiny missile that circled the room

for

a moment before locking onto the tail of the fly.  The fly immediately
panicked as it desperately flew around the room trying to lose it's

its

 >      "FRANK, NOOOOOO!!!"  Dr. Forrester screamed as the missile

abruptly aborted it's

its

The sky was as clear as fresh water in the morning. The way the sun
shone you would think it was literally bowing to the Tsuki no Hime.

Joel: But actually, the sun preferred Melty Blood.  Most folks do.

Yum. Melty Blood

When she was in front of the apartment's door she started to reach for
the knob when, all of a sudden, Mamoru opened the door while kissing
a red headed woman.

Crow: After years of rejecting Charlie Brown, the little red-haired girl
goes slumming.

Heh

Usagi ran with all her might. Her vision clearly stated that tears
blinded her.

Joel: ... her eyes can talk?

And yet still say nothing of consequence.

For once she was graceful, taking two steps at a time. She could hear
Mamoru shouting at her to stop running

Joel: <Mamoru as Tommy Lee Jones> Tsukino Usagi, it's time to stop
running!

Tom: <Usagi> But I caught you with another woman!

Joel: <Mamoru as Tommy Lee Jones> I don't care!

Hehehe.

The Queen of the Moon sighed as she sat on her throne while she felt
Usagi's soul enter the heaven gate,

Crow: Thank goodness her soul didn't get sent somewhere worse, like
Ishtar or Hudson Hawk.

Bah. I liked Hudson Hawk. Although keeping the agents with their STD names
would have been more amusing.

Usagi, in her princess form, was floating in pure white. Warmth
surrounded her. She kept on floating until she descended on her back
on something soft, 'Too soft.' She thought in confusion.

Crow: So soft that she didn't even notice Snuggles mauling her until it
was too late.

Snuggles, bah. The Care Bears are the ones that could seriously maul.

Crow: Only to have a falling Charlie Sheen ruin her day.

Tom: <Usagi> You jerk!  You sucked in "Men at Work" too!

Nod, nod. But it could be worse. It could have been Norm MacDonald who fell
into her lap. He's never done anything that didn't suck. He even titled one
of his movies 'Screwed' so you'd know coming in how you'd feel going out. :)

Crow: And if I see Robin Williams or Cuba Gooding Jr. I'm quitting
outright.

Yes, that would be for the best.

Joel: <Allen> Here's your television screen, Usagi.  Now scare that little
brat Carol Anne silly!

Hahaha! You know, I never thought of it from the other side like that.

Usagi looked at him with unshed tears and nodded as the duo left her.

'I hope she's okay,' Allen thought sadly.

Aside from the whole 'being dead' thing, she's fine.


 >The Queen drew in a breath to calm her senses, "It started when I met

your father in the garden, and your father was always hard to resist by
any girl,"

Tom: <Queen> He was immune to pepper spray and his bones healed
quickly.

Heh

Ami bit her lower lip as she stood in front of Usagi's grave. In her

hands

she held a bouquet a red rose.

A bouquet of one red rose, you see. It was a big rose.

A lonely tear rolled down her cheek as she spoke, "Usagi... it's been a
day," Ami smiled, "Time passes quickly... too quickly,"

Crow: Holy crap, she was buried in a flat hurry!

Now if it had  been Chibi-Usa who bit it, I'd have expected her to be
cremated and buried within an hour's time.

"Usagi," she whispered as she fell onto the damp ground.

Joel: <gravedigger> Hey, Smolken!  Cleanup on Aisle 3!

Heh

At last with one more tear she faded away as if she was trash.

Since trash, you know, fades away.

Crow: <Usagi> "Richard"?  The master of the universe and our Creator
is named "RICHARD"?!

Serenity: I just call him 'Dick'. It' because he has a fifteen inch--

Usagi: I don't want to know!

'Probably people dieing from age,' she thought as she ignored the fading
energies of people.

Crow: Meanwhile, Joe Estevez and Robert Z'Dar were laughing about
their fresh catches.

Ohh. I actually saw the JE movie. Oh, was that painful.

Joel: Yeah, that Quatre is one svelte heifer.

Then Quartre's face became straight.

Crow: Quatre?  Straight?  In fanfiction??

Obviously the author is taking great liberities here.

Usagi leaned over to look at his face as he began to talk again, "Look
out for your sister, Relena-hime."

Tom: <Quatre> She drives a truck too.

Heh

Usagi was in shock. Relena then spoke again in a voice that told
everyone that she was number one, "Rise Quartre," Relena smiled but it
disappeared as Relena turned towards Usagi, "And please teach this
bitch some manners." With that said she turned and walked away.

Usagi needs to point a gun at her head and threaten to kill her. Hey, it
worked for Heero. Relena thinks it's a sign of attraction and sexual
interest, and only some hot lesbian action can redeem anything about this
work.

"By killing the sailor senshi," he explained as Usagi dropped her books.

Usagi: Cool! We'll be together again, just like before. Does she need help
in killing them?

Tom: <Quatre> Naturally, God approves of this plan. Which reminds me,
I have to pick up his smokes and vodka after school.

Joel: <Usagi> Wouldn't it be easier to just hijack the Enterprise?

No! You bastard! Not Star Trek V flashbacks! Nooooo!

Crow: Well, at least it's nice to see Relena acting like her typical

fanfic

self....

Of course, she's evil because she prevented Heero from getting hot yaoi
action from all the guys in Wing. ^_^

Crow: And the million-dollar question: is this perky, cheerful TV
Hitomi, or scary, suicidal movie Hitomi?

Usagi smiled, "So your also my sisters?" she asked, 'They seem nice,'
she thought.

And then Miaka bit off Usagi's odangos, mistaking them for meatballs.

Joel: <Usagi> Wow, I have a bigger family than the Baldwins!

And have even more acting talent.

"Hi," said the one called Tomoyo with a smile, "I hope you'll enjoy it
here,"

If you don't enjoy Heaven, there's only one other place to go.

In the crystal ball Usagi saw through her tears that Relena's hand
appeared in the sacred fire room, the hand grabbed the sparkling red
star seed,

Then dropped it, as Relenad drew back a burned hand yelling, "Hot, hot,
hot!" Apparently it wasn't wise to handle the Senshi of Fire's spirit
without oven mitts.

Tom: <Deep Voice> WHO THE HELL IS RICHARD AND WHY IS
HE USING MY BATH TOWELS?!?  GET HIM OUT OF HERE,
PETER!

Hahahah

"Usagi, this is the Heaven Court," God said.

God: You have to defend yourself, since we have no lawyers here. They all go
to, well, you know, down there.

Tom: <Richard> Standing back, letting you handle it so that you could
grow as a human being and take your rightful place by my side
eventually... oh wait, you got tire treads on your face.  My bad.

Heh

"YOU HAVE DISPLAYED YOUR IGNORANCE! FOR YOUR
PUNISHMENT YOU'LL GO TO HELL!" God commanded.

Devil: Don't worry Usagi, we have no school here, and you can engage in
witty dance numbers with myself and Saddam Hussein.

Usagi: Sounds like an improvement already.

THAT'S ALL! A CLIFFHANGER I KNOW, SORRY BUT I WAS
IN A HURRY. HEAVEN MIGHT NOT SEEM RIGHT BUT
THAT'S HEAVEN TO ME.

Joel: Boring and cliched? Sounds about right.

ANYWAY R/R!

Revile and Retch? Okay.

And this continues for 3 more installments?

NOoooooooooooo!

     Piano and clarinet music suddenly filled the air as Torgo, now

dressed

in the white outfit of a choir boy, stumbled into the lab.  Dr. Forrester
cradled his head in his hands while Joel and the bots struggled to contain
their laughter.

     "GrEEtInGs... I aM ToRGo... I tAKe cARe oF...."  Torgo began.

Of course, Torgo. What wouldwe do without him.

             .---Anime/Manga Fanfiction Mailing List----.
             | Administrators - ffml-admins@anifics.com |
             | Unsubscribing - ffml-request@anifics.com |
             |     Put 'unsubscribe' in the subject     |
             `---- http://ffml.anifics.com/faq.txt -----'