Edward Becerra wrote on 5/10/2004, 3:15 PM:
> I recently got permission from Kenko to float
> this by the FFML in order to un-confuse folks who didn't
> understand some of the things referred to in the first
> draft of chapter 8 of Pagliacci.
WooHOO!
> Now, Kenk wants you all to know that this is
> STRICTLY beta, has lots of minor typos, is subject to
> extreme revision, and even entire re-writes.
Who cares! Gimme the fic!
> Don't read while driving, operating heavy
> construction equipment, while under the influence
> of alcohol or other recreational drugs. Don't read
> while laughing. Choking hazard. Not to be used by
> children under the age of 13. And all that rot.
> You get the idea.
Yeah yeah yeah. Now lemme at the good stuff!
> Anyway, enjoy, and if you have any feedback,
> be sure to let Kenko know, 'kay?.
Bbbut... I don't have his edress! (Oh, wait, I can just look it up
once I'm on line again, tonight...)
> Ed.
>
>
> The Training Of Hikaru Gosunkugi
>
> Or
>
> Courage and Chaos
>
> Part the First: Magic.
>
> In which a surprising revelation is revealed and one cursed person
> discovers that it's only going to get worse.
Well, heck, it's not like things ever get *better* for anyone in the
RanmaVerse.
> By Robert Haynie, following patterns laid down by Edward Becerra,
> and shamelessly borrowing characters and situations created by Rumiko
> Takahashi... and a bunch of other people who shall be referenced
> at the end.
IOW, inking by Haynie, stencils by Becerra, paint&canvas by Takahashi.
Got it.
> ####
>
> Maiku was a PI.
>
> PI's, in his worldview, should operate under certain rules--
> specifically, certain uniquely AMERICAN rules. Not surprisingly,
> he was the only private investigator in all Japan who felt this way.
> Then again, he was the only PI in all Japan who WAS a true PI, in the
> classic American style.
How circular.
> You HAD to have a weather-beaten hat. You HAD to have a case of
> 5 O'clock shadow-- which was why he shaved in the evenings so that
> in the morning it would be guaranteed. You HAD to habitually
> have a wrinkled cigarette hanging out of the corner of your mouth.
> (It didn't have to be lit. It just had to be there.)
Oh, so he's going *old* classic -- Sam Spade instead of Thomas Magnum.
> There were also things you were supposed to have that Maiku
> somehow never managed to get a hold of. Like a partner. All the
> best PI's had partners. True, their main purpose seemed to be for
> dying so that the big dramatic case could commence, in which you
> avenged your partner. Maiku couldn't begrudge anyone for being
> reluctant to work with him, considering those terms.
An obsessed man who's reasonable about his obsessions. I like that.
> You were also supposed to have a slightly battered 38 caliber
> Police Special, left over from your days on the force, which you left
> in anger because of all the corruption. Either that or a Colt 45
> automatic from your days in the Army. But Tokyo police didn't carry
> firearms as a rule, private ownership was restricted in ways that the
> American Democratic Party could only have wet dreams about, and
> anyway he'd never actually BEEN a cop. As for the other? Japan
> didn't HAVE an army any more, and were you likely to walk away from
> a stint in the SDF with a weapon?
Stinks, don't it?
> Yeah, RIGHT.
>
> As Maiku followed the blond foreigner, he was unexpectedly
> reminded that he DID have ONE of the things a "proper" PI was
> supposed to have. Even if she wasn't quite the classic version.
>
> "Maiku-chan!"
>
> (Oh, Crap.)
>
> "I suppose you're on a case?"
>
> It was HER. The strange girl that had saved his life at least
> twice... if not three times. He personally wasn't sure about the
> thing with the people in bird suits. "Um. Yes. Please tell me that
> you aren't involved in this thing."
Who...?
> "Sorry, Maiku-chan. I need to ask a favor."
>
> "I'm going to hate this, aren't I?" But Maiku knew that he was
> doomed even as he asked the question. He OWED the girl.
>
> "I just need to ask him a few questions. In private. You mind?"
>
> "Knock yourself out." Oh, well, at the worst it meant that it
> would take a day longer to get the information his client wanted...
> which, now that he thought on it was a GOOD thing since it meant that
> an extra day's pay would be forthcoming. Which meant that instead
> of paying off part of his karmic debt he probably owed her again.
He's part of the union, isn't he? PI Local 357...
> As the pigtailed redhead dashed off in her ill-fitting clothing
> after his target, he sighed. OTHER PI's got Dames that were slinky
> and seductive. HE got a martial artist from hell tomboy.
<BOGGLE> Okay, Ranma as a "Dame" in this sense just... did NOT occur
to me. Oy. But I gotta wonder about Maiku, if he's never stumbled over
knowledge of Ranma's true nature.
Wait, this is Nerima. Never mind.
> But at least there was a Dame in his life. The-- as he thought
> of her-- Lady in Red.
<facefault>
> "Shoulda KNOWN she was from Nerima," he muttered.
Ah. Well, that explains why he didn't know.
> ####
>
> Hikaru Gosunkugi, should you ask him, was not Hikaru Gosunkugi.
>
> Not when he was over two meters tall, blond, muscled in ways that
> would make not a few gods jealous (and goddesses blush) and dressed
> like a cheap knock off of Kevin Sorbo. Okay, the last was not true.
> He was dressed in an excruciatingly accurate reproduction of Kevin
> Sorbo's "Hercules" costume from the television series of the same
> name. (This would come to haunt him in ways he could not EVEN begin
> to comprehend at this moment in time.) And he felt like an absolute
> jackass.
I'd forgotten Ed's little Sorbo Scene a chapter or three back. Yes,
this could get interesting.
It's still better than the Superman getup, though.
> Clutching his new best friend in the whole wide world-- an
> umbrella that could have easily been purchased anywhere in London
> but only in one small shop in one particular district of the Nerima
> ward in Tokyo-- he ran as fast as he could. He wasn't sure how or
> why he knew, but he KNEW he was being followed. Not by the little
> pervert. Not by the OTHER little pervert. And not by-- he was very
> happy about this indeed-- any of the Amazons.
>
> No, he was being followed by something far, far worse, in his
> opinion. Something he'd come over time to regard as an almost
> unstoppable force of nature-- at least he hadn't ever heard of it
> being stopped.
Akane: Who am I, chopped liver?
> Then suddenly he wasn't being followed. But he knew very well
> why he wasn't being followed. The follower had overtaken him and
> dropped off of a rooftop to land in front of him.
>
> It was a girl. Quite attractive. Well formed. Eyes so blue,
> they reminded one of a lake's depths, and surely one could drown in
> them. Hair that mirrored the setting sun, yet the sun certainly
> was not as radiant. Clad in garments that should have spoken ill of
> her beauty, yet instead enhanced it to realms unlike any known on
> this coarse Earth.
Ranma: Okay, Haynie, just STOP writing about me that way, all right?
You're weirding me out, here...
> And as THAT part of Hikaru's mind went in to Romance Hero Mode,
> it was unexpectedly stomped on by a much louder part that was
> yelling, "SHUT UP, you MORON! It's RANMA! We are SO going to have
> our ass handed to us on a sizzle platter!"
Some things are more powerful than his curse. Lucky him.
> "You. We have to talk. I got a couple of questions. Better
> have a couple of answers."
>
> "Um... Miss, I am, sadly, in a hurry. If you don't mind--"
>
> "Oh, but I DO mind. It's sorta my job. See, you fight really
> good, ya know."
>
> Eiyu-Gos began to smile, in muted modest pride, when the redhead
> added, "And you damn well shouldn't be able to. Buster, you ain't
> going ANYWHERE until you explain how the HELL you fight like that
> when you ain't taken Lesson One in your entire LIFE."
>
> "How did-- I mean, of course I've trained. Where did you get the
> idea that--"
>
> "Save it, Blondie. You never trained at all. It's clear as day.
> Well, to ME anyhow," she retorted, with that aggravating smirk she
> shared with only one person in the ward-- although it wasn't worth
> the pain to mention that Nabiki had it as well.
Ranma vs Nabiki in a smugness contest. Oboy...
> "And... and what makes you say that, Miss?" Outward calm was
> beginning to dissolve as inward panic built up pressure more suited
> to a steam locomotive. Eiyu-Gos was NOT comfortable.
>
> "Someone who's trained, it's about Mind and Body acting as one.
> Or at least trying to. You? Pretty damn clear to me that Mind was
> pretty freaked out at what Body was doing half the time. You were
> doing stuff you didn't know you could do, and the umbrella cinched
> it. If ya HAD trained like you had to, to be able to fight at the
> level you were fightin' at, you'da been packing that bumbershoot
<boggle> Wait, did I just hear Ranma use the word "bumbershoot"?
> in the first place-- and you're damn lucky I was right about that.
>
> "No. You were all over the place, no single style-- just a bunch
> of unconnected moves that were tacked on to each other. It looked
> like French kickboxing, at first, but there was stuff in there that
> just didn't fit. And it was pretty obvious after a bit that you were
> supposed to be using a weapon-- but you didn't _know_ you were
> supposed ta.
Missing end quote. Deliberate?
> "You were confused and mixed up most of the time-- and should
> have got your ass kicked, but didn't. Cripes-- you were yelling
> incredibly lame attack names. Which is DUMB since western styles
> don't USE attack names. No. You ain't trained a day in your life,
> pal. And I intend to get an explanation. Here and now."
Minor quibble: Happi's new apprentice uses attack names in *his*
Western art. But maybe he's just an anomaly (above and beyond what he
is already, that is).
> "Um. Well. It's an ancient Spanish Secret method of training?"
>
> "You mean Secret Spanish method-- and try again. The Spanish
> ain't got but two Arts and that stuff wasn't either one of them."
Ah, the Saotome Encyclodpedia of World Martial Arts. "I'll take Wildly
Obscure Martial Arts for $1000, Alex."
> "I read a book? Yeah, that's it, a very old book about--"
>
> "Oh, PLEASE. The only books that would have that kind of a
> mishmash of fighting techs would be a cheap-ass romance novel. A bad
> one."
Tee hee! I wonder how soon he'll discover just how true that is.
> "Aliens imprinted it into my brain?" Eiyu-Gos was becoming
> desperate, and with his mental processes in a state of war between
> the opposing concepts of Ranma Is A Babe and Ranma Will Kick My Ass
> In Ways I Dare Not Conceive, his attempts at plausible lies were
> becoming more feeble.
Not a bad try, actually.
A mental conlfict all too typical in Nerima.
> "Not even close. I happen to know that most aliens know squat
> about the Art. They rely on powers too much to have ever developed
> any. Except for Juraian Swordplay, and that stuff wasn't it."
Not to mention that most alien Arts depend on having the wrong number
of arms, or legs, or tentacles...
Ranma knows Juraiian Sword? Innnnteresting.
> Okay. What the hell was Ranma talking about? "Exposure to
> cosmic radiation?"
No, that just turns you into a Marvel Superhero.
> Ranma merely LOOKED at him, her expression clearly saying,
> "Pardon me, kind sir, but I am NOT a moron."
>
> "Well, it's really very simple, I can explain, if you'll just--
> OW! HOT HOT HOT!"
Well, *this* should move the plot along. (:)
> For reasons that have never really been explained, in Nerima,
> especially Furinkan-cho, most people saw nothing wrong with dumping
> large amounts of water out of their windows. It was the upper-floor
> apartment dweller's equivalent of the ubiquitous ladle lady dousing
> the sidewalk. However, where said ladle lady would be performing
> a sort of morning ritual, and thus with cold tap water, the
> upper-floor apartment people would be dumping the water for different
> reasons.
Well, you see, the "water magnet" aspect of the curse has the power to
reach back in time, see, and pre-position all these people years in
advance...
> Such as a small domestic argument, resulting in a teapot thrown
> out the window.
>
> And, by what could best be called Cosmic Dramatic Necessity,
> breaking against a railing and dousing both Ranma and the blond.
> With predictable results... in fact, inevitable ones.
You mean Gos's clothes fall off?
> As Nerima's Premiere Female Martial Artist was replaced by
> Nerima's Premiere Male Martial Artist, Nerima's Newest Impressive
> Hero was replaced by someone who was nothing of the sort at all.
>
> Ranma stared at the sight of a soaked and steaming Hikaru
> Gosunkugi almost swimming in the leather and metal outfit. And he
> sighed, deeply. "For pity's sake, Gos, why didn't ya just come out
> and tell me the truth instead of making all that silly stuff up?"
> ####
>
> Ranma listened to Gosunkugi's tale of woe in a small tea-shop
> somewhat off the beaten track. Off the beaten track meant that it
> was not in Furinkan-cho, but Tomobiki-cho, where people were less
> familiar with the pig-tailed fighter. And as the poster boy for
> underdevelopment (and at the moment, dressing to prove it) ended his
> tale, Ranma released another heavy sigh.
>
> "Ya know, it's funny. I never noticed that you had such
> potential to be a martial artist."
>
> "I do?" said Gosunkugi, beginning to preen.
>
> "I mean, it's usually only martial artists that make that kind
> of dumb-ass mistake. I think it's cause we keep gettin' hit in the
> head. Heck, even I've pulled a few prize ones in my time. 'Course
> they mostly consisted of listening to Pop, but you woulda thought
> I'd learn. I know I would think so."
<whistles innocently>
> "Thanks," replied the new cursed on the block, no longer
> preening. There was something very galling to have his intellect
> compared to Ranma's, the most galling of which being that it sounded
> pretty much correct.
"New Cursed On The Block"? Sounds like a Neriman boy-- er, *something*
band.
> "You're welcome. So, what style are you interested in?"
>
> "Very funny."
>
> "I ain't joking. You better start thinking about it...
> apprentice."
Darth Ranma?
> Gosunkugi blinked. "There must be something funny in this tea.
> The menu did say it was from off planet. It's messing with my
> hearing."
>
> "And why do you think that?"
>
> "Because I could have sworn you called me... oh. Oh, no. No
> WAY!"
Say what you will, Gos has decent (if belated) survival instincts.
> "Yes way. See, you made a big-ass mistake today. And you
> probably don't even realize it."
>
> "Mistake?"
>
> "You went and got yourself a rival."
>
> Gosunkugi somehow managed to go even more pale than he usually
> was. "Oh. My. God."
Like I said, belated.
> "And Happosai's training him. Way I have it figured, mostly
> in how to be an effective perv. But some of the Art will be in
> there. Not to mention what a hassle that scrub will be when he
> learns how to use panties to draw ki."
>
> "Oh. My. DEAR AND MERCIFUL GOD."
"Kami-sama! Wherefore hast thou forsaken me?"
> "And the main thing that keeps Happi in check is me. So, you're
> my apprentice, especially after the old freak did that Star Wars gig
> today."
>
> "I don't understand."
>
> Ranma smirked. "Well, the way I figure it, you're my best chance
> at the moment to see a light side to this farce."
Ranma... makes... PUNS?
> Gosunkugi would have tried to hit Ranma for the pun, but he knew
> he would never land a blow. That, and he knew-- as little as he
> might wish to admit it-- that Ranma was right.
>
> "I hate you, you know."
>
> "Never heard of a student who didn't hate his sensei, at
> first..."
Of course, using Genma as a baseline may be skewing his sample...
> ####
>
> Ranma had evaluated Hikaru Gosunkugi's cursed form.
>
> Said cursed form was trying to figure out where all the bruises
> had come from.
Sounds about right.
> Hikaru had never been in a "real" fight with Ranma-- as far as he
> was concerned, the Battle Armor travesty didn't count. And, truth
> to tell, he hadn't been now. It was merely a spar, to Ranma's eyes.
> Intellectually, Hikaru knew this also. EMOTIONALLY, well...
>
> Eiyu-Gos had just discovered what a spar with the Best of the
> Best meant.
"...die like the rest."
> It meant pain.
>
> "I figured it out, Gos. You ain't got any skills."
Tactful.
> At that, the blond romance hero took offense. "Hey, I blocked
> at least... one. One of your punches. And I'm alive! And you said
> that my moves were good!"
>
> "Good, yes. Skilled, no. You ain't got any skills. What you
> got is instincts."
>
> "Huh?"
>
> "Freaky effective instincts, yeah... but that's all you got.
> Skills, you learn them. You train them, you master them. Ain't
> something you can do, Gos. Because you ain't got any skills. You
> got instincts. And that ain't gonna be enough."
>
> "I see... then what do we do--OWW! HOT! HOT! HOT!"
>
> Ranma grinned, setting aside the kettle. "I try to teach you
> some skills. For real, with you being you. With any luck, it'll
> carry over."
>
> Gosunkugi blinked. Slowly. "You mean... you're going to do to
> me what you just did to me when I'm not changed?"
I need to go buy a wreath. What's appropriate for Japanese Voodo funerals?
> "Pretty much. Now, the first thing you have to learn is how to
> fall-- Oh."
>
> Ranma gazed upon the now unconscious Gosunkugi, who had passed
> out at the very thought of training with Ranma in an uncursed state.
> "Well, ain't what I had in mind, but seems you got a head start on
> that lesson..."
Rotfl!
> ####
>
> "Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow."
>
> "You got the fallin' part almost perfect, apprentice."
>
> "Off a damn FENCE?"
>
> "Ain't ready for rooftops yet."
"mommy!"
> "Ow..."
>
> "We're almost there, anyway. Back on the fence."
>
> "WAHHHHHH!"
>
> ####
>
> Gosunkugi looked around the facility. A large gym room, a bank
> of computers, shower facilities, lockers-- this was a place tailor
> made for a master martial artist to train an apprentice, if the
> master martial artist was also an ace secret agent, or maybe Batman.
O_o
> Exercise equipment, much of it decidedly high tech, stood next to
> traditional martial arts training tools. Various weapons and
> equipment were displayed in cases, ranging from the simple wooden
> staff to what looked like some sort of portable laser cannon. All
> hidden from public view, reached via a secret passage in an abandoned
> warehouse.
o_O
> In other words, somehow Ranma had an honest to the kami Secret
> Base, just like in a spy movie or a manga or an anime.
O_O
> Gosunkugi, on the other hand, merely had a headache.
>
> "What... what IS this place?"
>
> "Old Mishima Heavy Industries lab. For field-testing
> battlesuits and stuff like that. Obsolete, at least as far as
> they're concerned, so they let me use it after I did them a couple
> of favors. You know, stuff like helpin' them to field-test that
> Poison Zeta thingy."
<boggle> There is a positive *wealth* of backstory here, just
*begging* to be told...
> "Poison what?"
>
> "Well, I wasn't exactly planning to help, to be honest. But that
> dipstick Arisa mistook me for Atsuko, don't know how, we don't look
> anything alike, and well, Akiko-san was really upset about it, and
> she sorta lent me the place so I'd have a place to workout and test
> new moves, if I didn't sue or nothin'. And it sort of grew on me.
> She's pretty cool when she ain't trying to blow up her husband."
You know, in a *sane* world, we wouldn't be able to take that
explanation in stride.
"Workout" is a noun. The verbal form should be "work out," I think.
> "But... but all this equipment?"
>
> "She don't need it none. I test some of it for her, send her my
> impressions... you know, scratching backs." Ranma checked a computer
> terminal, and sighed. "No new e-mail. Well, that just means I can
> spend extra time on your training."
<!>
> "YOU know how to use a computer?"
That's what *I* was thining.
> "Who doesn't? Ain't like it's difficult." Ranma shrugged.
> "Why do people always think I'm some kinda dummy, just because I
> didn't get to study as much as some?"
Well, because you *act* like... never mind.
> "That page is in English."
>
> "Your point?"
>
> "Well, you never pay attention in Hinako-sensei's class."
>
> "Why should I? I know English already, better'n her. Learned
> it on US army bases. Good training, with their special forces guys.
> Hmm... need to save these posts for later reading."
Spoken, yeah, I could see that. But written? Then again, the best SF
guys tend to be readers, with rather eclectic tastes...
> "Posts?"
>
> "On Usenet. Alt.Martial-Arts.Esoteric. Newsgroup for the really
> capable martial artist. Moderated, so less SPAM."
Okay, he's freaking me out, here.
> "And I suppose you go and visit SPAMmers in the night to get them
> to stop, huh?"
>
> "Naw. I'm too nice a guy. No tellin' what Shizuma might do,
> though, or Hiei. Shizuma's a loose cannon if ever there was one, and
> Hiei can get kinda petty at times."
I don't know any Shizumas, but... Hiei? YYH Hiei?
> As Ranma turned to the terminal again, Hikaru Gosunkugi was
> trying desparately to wake up from the strange, surreal dream. And
> reluctantly beginning to accept that it wasn't a dream after all.
>
> This was a side of Ranma that Gosunkugi had never seen-- and
> suspected that no-one else had either. His preconceptions
> of the martial artist were being challenged in ways he'd never
> considered.
Join the club.
> Computer savvy. Apparently a lot more intelligent than anyone
> gave him credit for. Connections with one of the most powerful
> corporations in Japan-- possibly in the world. And mentioning
> names that he'd never heard of. Names of people not from Nerima--
> and who weren't trying to kill him.
Wait, Ranma knows people who aren't trying to kill him? Is that even
POSSIBLE? (:)
> "Where's Rod Serling? I know he's here somewhere," muttered
> Gosunkugi, who still couldn't quite believe that any of this was
> real.
>
> "Who?"
<phew!> Okay, he *does* have limits!
> "Never mind. How come no-one knows about all this?"
>
> "'Cause I don't tell anyone. Incidentally, I'd be very damn
> unhappy if anyone found out about the base. Especially people like
> Kuno and Nabiki."
AKA Bokken Boy and Blackmail Girl.
...okay, this fic is *officially* rotting my brain.
> "Got it," quavered the apprentice. "So... why am I here?"
>
> "Training. I can't teach you anything but a few basics in any
> short time. But I can teach you those. At the least they'll help
> you live long enough to find cold water when you need it."
"So there I was, middle of the Gobi at high noon..."
> "It finds me easily enough," Gosunkugi whined.
>
> "Until you NEED it. Trust me, I know."
He would.
> "It's just so unfair."
>
> "What is?"
>
> "The insanity."
>
> "What insanity?"
>
> At that, Gosunkugi stared at Ranma in sheer disbelief. "After
> everything I told you about at that tea shop, you can ask me THAT?"
>
> "Ya didn't say anything particularly strange at the tea shop."
>
> "I've got a pack of marriage-hungry Amazons after me, I can't
> help but want to help, water seems to hide in wait to attack me from
> nowhere, people want to fight me for no rational reason, my mother--
> oh, don't get me started on my MOTHER, she's completely out of her
> MIND, my dad's NO help at ALL, and Gods in Heaven help me, the only
> person who even seems to sympathise the tiniest bit is YOU! You
> can't tell me that that's not STRANGE!"
Consider your audience, Gos.
> Ranma paused for a moment, and started ticking items off on his
> fingers. "Hmm... chicks chasin' ya. Want to help... part of the
> duty, I guess. Water from outta the blue. Challenges. Mom's kinda
> a nut. Pop useless. Hmm..."
>
> The pigtailed youth mused for a moment, and then replied, "I
> don't see what you're gettin' at, Gos. Sounds pretty normal to me."
>
> As Gosunkugi toppled over at that comment, Ranma continued,
> "Now, if you ever start turning into a hot chick, that I can advise
> you about. But why're you sweating the everyday stuff?"
>
> "I'm doomed. I am SO DOOMED."
>
> ####
>
> Hikaru dragged himself to the door of his house, Ranma in tow.
> "This your place, Gos? Pretty nice joint," the martial artist noted.
>
> "It'll be heaven if Mother's out," the walking bruised (Ranma
> had not wounded him) replied.
>
> "Anyhow, see you later."
>
> "Um..." Gosunkugi began to draw imaginary circles in the dust.
> "I was kinda hoping you'd come in to talk to my mother--"
>
> "And let her know I'm training you?"
>
> "Um. Yes."
>
> "No can do. She's not what you'd call subtle, is she?"
She makes Nodoka look subtle.
> "Um. No."
>
> "So she hears, she starts bragging to her friends-- and we want
> to keep this secret."
>
> "We do?"
>
> "Unless you WANT Happi and friend showing up to mess with you."
>
> "ACK."
>
> "In fact, find out if she's told anyone. Best to keep it under
> wraps."
>
> "And how do you propose I get her to keep quiet?"
>
> "Oh, that's EASY..."
>
> ####
>
> "Oh, I can't BELIEVE I forgot to tell Aria-chan and Megumi-chan
> about my wonderful son!"
>
> Gosunkugi steeled himself. "Actually, Mother, it's best that you
> don't tell ANYONE. In fact, I have to insist."
It's like watching a wet noodle insist on not being eaten...
> "But why?" Mrs. Gosunkugi was somewhat taken aback at this
> pronouncement. She SO wanted to share her pride in her son, now that
> there was something to be proud about.
...okay, I can actually sympathize with that, a little....
> "It's called a Secret Identity. All the best Heroes have them,
> mother. I have that on good authority."
>
> Mrs. Gosunkugi blinked. "Can't you get by with, um, a pair of
> glasses or something?"
"That only works for Kryptonians."
> "Oh, like THAT'LL fool anyone. No, Mother, I have a tailor made
> secret identity, and I'm going to use it."
Also known as "Disappearing up your own existence." Handy, that.
> "Well, if you insist..." The lady was somewhat disappointed,
> but at least her Hikaru-chan was going to TRY.
>
> ####
>
> "Clark, you sneezed. You NEVER sneeze."
(-O_O-) <---"Kryptonian Wearing Glasses" Emoticon.
> ####
>
> Over the next few days, Gosunkugi's life took on a rather
> monotonous, if completely unlike anything he would have ever
> predicted, routine.
>
> Get up. Bathe. Get dressed. Go to school. Keep ducking Kuno
> as best he could. Dodge water. The last was the hard part, but with
> Ranma's covert aid, possible.
>
> Then go home, change clothes, and meet Ranma at the Base.
>
> And THEN experience pain unlike aything he'd ever experienced
> in his LIFE. Repeatedly. And have it start to DO things for him.
>
> Because Ranma knew The Art. Every time Ranma spoke about The Art
> Gosunkugi could HEAR the capitals-- or would have, were they speaking
> English. As it was, he had a mental image of the proper kanji leap
> into his mind.
>
> And Ranma had a method for teaching that was startlingly
> effective, simple, and elegant. It was based on two simple concepts.
>
> Everything Genma did that worked, was used.
>
> Everything that didn't, wasn't.
So, teaching Gos to swim by tying a cinderblock to his feet and tossing
him in the ocean got used, huh? I mean, it *did* work...
Still, nice and concise way to put it. I like it.
> Gosunkugi was in serious pain after every lesson.
>
> Gosunkugi was also, despite a natural inclination to the
> opposite, actually learning Kempo.
>
> He just wasn't HAPPY about it.
>
> It was really quite obvious, or would have been, had there been
> an outsider to observe the actual training. The single person least
> able to learn Kempo on the planet, who was not physically disabled,
> was Hikaru Gosunkugi. Ranma took the idea of training said Hikaru
> Gosunkugi as a challenge.
Sug: "...planet, barring the physically disabled/handicapped, was..."
> In fact, considering Hikaru's innate wimpiness, he looked at it
> as a sort of a fight-- a battle between Hikaru's almost absolute
> lack of any talent at the Art and Ranma's ability to teach.
Sug: "challenge" for "fight"?
> And as far as Ranma was concerned, it could be easily be called
> Anything-Goes Martial Arts Teaching to the Inept. That was how Ranma
> thought of it, anyhow.
Sug: Teaching of the (Hopelessly?) Inpet.
> And when it came to martial arts...
>
> Well, you know what they say about Ranma Saotome.
>
> They're right, you know.
"My victory, Gos, shall be won by blood, sweat, and tears. Yours."
> ####
>
> "So, give us your-- OW!"
>
> It was the guys in the animal masks. If there was anything
> Hikaru Gosunkugi hated more than the fact that Akane and Ranma were--
> technically-- a couple, it was the guys in the animal masks.
>
> And Hikaru blinked as the guy in the Octopus mask sat suddenly
> on his ass where he'd been driven to by a not particuarly forceful
> but completely unexpected punch. Then he stared at his fist. There
> had been the start of a threatening move-- the traditional prelude
> to his getting beaten up again, and relexes he had no idea he
> possessed had suddenly taken over.
Heh. "Reflexes" as opposed to "instincts." The instruction is taking,
I see.
> The rest of the gang stood frozen for a moment, and then began
> to advance in a menacing fashion (Something they were quite good at)
uncap (Something)
> when a crimson breeze seemed to pass by, and then they were all on
> the ground, moaning in pain.
The Crimson Hurricane!
> "Yeesh. I thought we were RID of you guys." A delicate hand
> plucked a mask from a face. "Huh. Seems we were. Who are YOU?"
>
> The unfamiliar face stared at the very pretty girl who had, for
> the lack of a better phrase, just kicked his ass. "Please don't hit
> me again?"
>
> "Depends on your answer."
>
> "We bought them from some guys, they said that they'd make us the
> toughest gang on the--"
>
> "You ain't from Furinkan, are ya?"
>
> "No Ma'am! We're from Kolkhoz. We just wanted to--"
??? Isn't Kolhhoz in Russia?
> "To forget the gang thing, and the mask thing, and live honest
> and righteous lives from now on, right?" The blue eyes had an edge
> of menace that the would-be ganger had never imagined was possible.
Who needs Jedi Mind Tricks?
> "Um... Yes! Whatever you say, Ma'am!"
>
> "Good. Because I'll know if you don't."
>
> As the no-longer gangers scrambled away, Ranma looked at
> Gosunkugi, with an approving smile. "Whad'ya know, he CAN be taught.
> Passable punch, that. Your wrist was too stiff, tho'."
>
> "I... I hit him. I really HIT him. And he fell down!"
"This has never happened to me before."
> "Less skill or power than luck-- he wasn't expecting it. But it
> was a fair blow. Anyhow, we've got special training this afternoon."
Agression and surprise wins a surprising number of fights.
> "We do?"
>
> "Yeah. We're taking a little trip. Cold-water style."
>
> "Where? And why?"
>
> "You'll see. We hit the base first."
"base" was capped earlier, but that was during Gos-Centric narration.
> "I'm going to hate this, aren't I?"
>
> Ranma paused. She carefully thought over her possible replies,
> and decided to go with the truth.
>
> "Probably."
Points for honesty, none for reassurance.
> ####
>
> "So, who splashed you?"
>
> "Nobody," replied Ranma. "I'm a girl on purpose."
>
> Gosunkugi blinked. "Okay. And WHY are you a girl on purpose?"
>
> "Because I can't do this as a guy," replied the redhead, opening
> a door that Gosunkugi hadn't noticed before. He followed her-- and
> then found himself upside down against the opposing wall, with a
> glaring Ranma-chan standing over him.
>
> "What do you THINK you're doing?!?"
?
> "Owwww."
>
> "Answer the question!"
>
> "Following my sensei?" (PLEASE let that be the right answer.)
>
> "Into my dressing room? And here I figured you were supposed
> to be some sort of a gentleman."
>
> "I didn't even KNOW you had a dressing room! Wait. WHY do you
> have a dressing room?"
Good question.
> Ranma blinked. "OK... sorry. Kinda forgot you didn't know yet.
> Anyhow, you don't go in there. That's my girl place."
O_o
> "Girl place."
>
> "Where I keep my girl stuff."
o_O
> "Girl stuff."
>
> "Right. So, you see why you ain't allowed."
O_O
> "I HAVE NO DAMN IDEA WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT!"
I'm having strange "Girl Days" *and* "NewRanma" flashbacks,
simultaneously, here. And I'm telling you, it's a WEIRD combination...
> "I have girl clothes in there and that's where I change into
> them."
>
> "Oh."
>
> "So, you can't come in--"
>
> "WAIT A MINUTE. SINCE WHEN DO YOU WILLINGLY DRESS LIKE A
> GIRL?!?"
>
> "It ain't about willing. It's about needing to. Sometimes
> I do things that mean I need to be a girl, and dress nice."
(must... suppress... hentai... wisecrack...)
> "I don't understand," Gos said, now as confused as he had ever
> been in his life.
>
> "You will. Now, get wet. There's a change of clothes over
> there, stuff that WORKS where we're going. Not anything like your
> mom picks up. Yeesh. Like SHE has any idea how to dress for a
> fight."
Wellll, I dunno, that Sorbo outfit isn't so bad for fighting in. Ditto
the Indiana Jones combo, as long as you know how to use a whip. OTOH,
the spandex is *right* out, unless you've got superpowers.
> "Tell me. I know I am going to hate this, but exactly how MUCH
> am I going to hate this?"
>
> Ranma paused, and just before entering her dressing room,
> replied, "Well, actually, there are upsides."
>
> And then she gave a quick, almost feminine smile that chilled
> Gosunkugi to his very marrow.
<twitch>
> ####
>
> Okay.
>
> This was STRANGE.
>
> For some reason, Ranma had had him dress in a perfectly tailored
> three-piece suit. Apparently, formal wear of some kind was proper
> fighting gear where-ever they were going.
I think I see where this is going.
> She'd also been very instistent that he made certain he knew
> where his umbrella was. He was going to need it, she'd said.
>
> She.
>
> Eiyu-Gos looked over at the redhead, her pigtail undone and
> refashioned into a simple ponytail. Clad in white hip-hugging
> leather pants and midriff-revealing bustier, knee-high gray boots
> and matching bracers, and a black leather sleeveless longcoat with
> a sort of eclipsed moon emblazoned on the left side of her chest,
> she looked like she'd just fallen out of a Matrix knockoff--
> down to the dark glasses.
....bad thoughts, Bad Thoughts, BAD THOUGHTS!
<ahem> Matrix or Emma Frost, yeah. Oy.
> "I can't imagine why you're dressed like that. Or why we're
> trying to ride the train from the damn OUTSIDE!" screamed Eiyu-Gos
> at Ranma.
"We're in a recession, or hadn't you noticed?"
> Which, mind you, they were. Instead of being inside of the
> bullet train, like any sane person, they were clinging to the top of
> the high-speed mecha, and to Eiyu-Gos's total amazement, NOT falling
> off. Thus the screaming, else he would not have been heard.
<blink> I thought that to qualify as "mecha," a machine had to be
human- or animal-oid.
> "It's cheaper," yelled back the no-longer pig-tailed girl, "and
> we'll need to be on the outside when it's time to jump!"
>
> "JUMP?!?"
>
> "Well, I can't very well ask the driver to stop the train, can
> I?"
Such a... reasonable... justification.
> "I hate you i hate you i hate you," Gosunkugi murmured to
> himself, as a sort of a mantra. Oddly, it DID soothe him.
>
> ####
>
> "Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow."
Any landing you can still complain about...
> "Work on a better battle cry, Wan. Now, about that landing--
> oh, wait, we're here, time to meet the girls."
>
> "Ow. Ow. Ow... who?"
Surprised his suit didn't take any damage, though.
> "Prepare yourself, my student, for an experience that will amaze
> you. I know it amazed me."
>
> "Yeah, right. This is all some sadistic...oh, MY."
>
> A girl had come around the corner.
>
> Her garments were, to be truthful, eccentric. A strangely
> stylised version of a girl's school uniform at first glance, although
> the multilayered skirt, the peculiar jewelry, and the heeled boots
> weren't anything you'd find at any school in Tokyo. Much less the
> wings.
Wings would make it Eternal Moon, right?
> The girl had wings.
>
> And Ranma blinked as Eiyu-Gos's instincts took over, and he
> suddenly dropped to one knee, his head bowed.
>
> "Um... Moonshadow, who is this--"
Moonshadow? Okay. For a bit, I was thinking we were having a
"Paragon" crossover.
> "He's my apprentice, Sailor Moon."
>
> Eiyu-Gos looked up-- barely, and murmured, "Your Highness.
> Unworthy as I am to even be in your presence, please accept what
> small aid that Sensei thinks I can give."
>
> Eternal Sailor Moon, one of the most powerful beings on the
> planet, blinked in mild confusion. "How did you know I was a
> princess?"
>
> "Is it not obvious? Your bearing, your demeanor, your very
> aura... is it not clear to all? Is it not sung from the skies
> themselves? Is it not chanted by the stones of the earth? Is it
> not--OW!" His Typical Romance Hero Speech, delivered in a style that
> would have given Kuno a serious case of envy, was interrupted
> by a sudden blow to the top of his skull.
"Geez, Moonshadow, you could have let him finish. Every girl likes a
little worship now and then."
> "It ain't obvious, since it's the first I'VE heard of it. Moon,
> what's he talking about?"
>
> "I never mentioned it? I'm a reincarnated princess from the Moon
> Kingdom."
>
> "Never came up, I guess."
>
> "That's odd. Um... he knows what you really are, right?"
>
> "Yup. And he isn't who he looks like either."
>
> Sailor Moon blinked. "So, that's why you bought him-- he's like
> you, and that's his... other shape?"
I'm sensing a subtext, here.
> Ranma-- or rather, Moonshadow, as Sailor Moon had called her
> nodded. "Yup again. Went to China on PURPOSE, and jumped into the
> Spring of Tall Gaijin Dumb Blond."
>
> "It is as sensei say-- HEY!"
<snerk>
> Moonshadow smirked. "Call him Tenorioh Wan. He's sort of
> Spanish."
>
> Sailor Moon blinked. "How can anyone be sort of Spanish?"
>
> "The same way I'm sort of a girl."
...well, that says it all, right there.
> "Oh. Well, the others are at the park. I suppose you want to
> make your usual dramatic entrance?"
>
> Moonshadow nodded. "That's half the fun."
>
> "I'll go ahead, then. You know, Mercury still hasn't figured
> out how you find us when one of these things pops up."
>
> "Mercury is smart, but she's going to be like the rest and try to
> figure some mystical, arcane thing, like I have some wierd
SP: "weird"
> ShadowSense or something. It just plain wouldn't occur to her that
> you just call ahead and tell me to meet you guys."
Nah, ShadowSense only works if you're trying to find Cranston or Allard...
> Sailor Moon merely giggled.
>
> "I think it's those communicators. Makes them forget that
> cellphones exist, they do," noted Moonshadow.
Hey, at the prices DoCoMo wanted for a cross-connection service to the
GSM network....
> "At least for talking about something like this."
>
> Eiyu-gos was puzzled. Not only was Ranma chatting amiably with
> what was, as best as he could see, a true princess-- indeed, nearly
> a goddess-- but she was doing so in a scandalously informal fashion.
> As he rubbed his head from the bump that Ranma had granted him, he
> kept staring at the skies.
>
> Apparently, the gods were slackers, since Saotome hadn't been
> struck down for her effrontery yet. As Sailor Moon left, he looked
> up at the person who in a few days had become a blend of sensei,
Sug: "over the past few days"
> confidant, and source of all pain, and asked, "How is it that you
> know a goddess incarnate?"
>
> "Naw, that's Belldandy-san. But I can see the Princess thing
> working for Sailor Moon, now that I think about it. Explains the
> sticks."
Ranma knows the Norns, too? Geez.
> "Sticks?"
>
> "Scepters, more like. Hella nasty scepters. Anyhow, told you it
> was amazing. I was pretty impressed when I first saw her myself,
> there's something about the girl. Didn't freak like you did, tho.
> Must be something in the water."
>
> "Something in--"
>
> "As in, China."
>
> "Oh. Um... how did you meet... Her?"
Now Gos is speaking in Capitals. Heh.
> "Long story..."
>
> And for a moment Ranma-Moonshadow's expression softened as she
> thought back to that particular day, over a year ago...
Unfortunately, the wavery video FX and harp music were stripped by
Ecartis as "Unsupported Attachments," more's the pity.
> ####
>
> As best as he could tell, he wasn't DYING. It hurt too much for
> that.
>
> Ranma Saotome had been in Nerima for perhaps a month when Kasumi
> had asked him to catch a train to Juuban and pick up a package at a
> shop that was the closest place that sold certan seasonings she liked
> to keep about. Shoyu one could get anywhere, but fresh basil wasn't
> a commonplace in Tokyo-- certainly not Nerima. And he'd never heard
> of couscous, but it was something Kasumi wanted to try.
>
> And on the way back from that shop, planning to take the train
> the cheap way (A technique that he would more than a year later teach
> to one Hikaru Gosunkugi) he found himself under attack.
>
> Being under attack was nothing new to him. So far, he got a fair
> amount of it from Kuno, Ryoga, and the like. Being under attack
> by what looked like some wierd-ass cross between a gasoline pump and
> a girl, though... that was novel.
>
> And right now he couldn't feel anything but pain from his empty
> chest where a gleaming crystal had been removed.
Ah, it's a Daimon. That pins down the season.
> "It's not a Talisman. Put it back, Neptune."
>
> (Wonder what that means? And why didn't that thing get hurt by
> my blows? It was like it didn't even notice. Wish I could move.)
>
> Then he felt his strength begin to return as a oddly garbed woman
> released the shining gem that had been inside him. He began to
> struggle to his feet, still determined to do battle.
>
> "You're a tough one, boy. But you're not going to be of any help
> here. Better let Sailor Moon and her friends take care of it."
>
> Still groggy, he looked up uncertainly, and saw Sailor Moon for
> the first time. She hadn't, then, the wings that would mark her
> penultimate form, but still he found it difficult to breathe as he
> gazed at her. There was pretty, and then there was the almost
> supernal beauty of the fuku-clad form-- who was doing her level best
> not to get incinerated by the gas-pump thing, who was now doing a
> very nice flamethrower imitation.
>
> Magical girls. Just like on TV, like Akane liked to watch. But
> a hell of a lot more impressive than any anime could create. Real
> magical-- wait a moment.
>
> He'd met an old Chinese man about a year ago, in Hong Kong, who
> was buying antiques with his nephew and a Japanese man who made Pop
> look freaking skinny. The nephew was a martial artist too-- a damn
> good one, and he'd had one of the most fulfilling spars of his life
> that afternoon.
>
> But the old man had looked at him, and shaken his head. "You are
> going to have a strange life. Uncle can tell. You have the same air
> as Jackie does."
Oooohh.
> "Oh, not that again," the Nephew had complained.
I don't think "nephew" should be capped.
> "You are saying your life is normal?"
>
> Nephew Jackie had fallen silent.
Don't think "nephew" is needed, here.
> "Listen to Uncle, boy. Try to be honest. Train well. And...
> be careful."
>
> "Heh. Like I need to worry about bein' careful."
>
> "One more thing. ESPECIALLY be careful in China. There are
> things in China that are very dangerous!"
>
> "I ain't afraid of no--"
>
> "One MORE thing. You should keep your wrist more straight
> when throwing your punches."
>
> "Hmm... Yeah, I guess that couldn't hurt--"
>
> "ONE MORE thing. Remember-- if you ever come up against it, do
> not try to fight magic with your hands and feet! Magic must defeat
> Magic!"
You've got Uncle's diction down nicely, here.
Now, personally, I like to see Magic defeated with High-Velocity
Jacketed Lead, but I'm not writing this story. Pass the popcorn?
> "Huh?"
>
> The nephew had nodded. "That's one I'd remember."
>
> And he did.
>
> Could it work?
>
> Could he USE his curse?
>
> He was alone, and unseen. He saw a faucet nearby. He opened
> the valve, and stopped being a he.
Wow. I do think this is the first time I've seen *this* use for
Ranma's girl form.
> And as she shook her hair free of the water that was usually
> her bane, and adjusted her clothing, she hoped to hell she was right
> about this.
>
> Sailor Moon was going almost insane. How the heck was she going
> to even START a Moon Spiral Heart Attack if she had to dodge fire
> that even Mars would be hard pressed to generate? And the others
> weren't here, and the enigmatic Sailor Neptune and Sailor Uranus
> weren't being of any help-- they'd vanished again.
>
> If only she had a distraction.
>
> A distraction was provided by a howling blur of redhead, who
> slammed into the Daimon with a brutal leap-kick. And the Daimon
> SCREAMED.
Waddaya know? It works.
> Ranma smirked. Magical Girls, Magical Monster... Magical BODY.
>
> Magic Must Defeat Magic.
>
> (I'm a magical girl too. HEH.)
Great, now we'll NEVER get his ego uninflated...
> A second kick, a well placed punch... then a throw into a
> convienient wall. That was all Sailor Moon needed to land the
> finishing blow.
>
> "MOON SPIRAL HEART ATTACK!"
>
> Ranma stared at the thing that had erased the Daimon-- a
> strange, almost astral in nature bolt of energy that had resembled
> for a moment a huge pink heart. But there was no denying the power
> of the attack-- or the effectiveness.
Sug: "...or its effectiveness."
> "Whoa. That's some move you got there, lady."
"So, what kinda technique is that, anyway?"
> Sailor Moon stared. "How did you hurt that Daimon? If there's
> one thing we've learned about youma, no matter what kind, it's that
> you can't just beat them up. If you could, Jupiter would be really
> happy. It takes magic."
>
> "Heh. Yeah, it does. Good thing I'm magical. He he heh. Just
"Heh heh heh."
> like what the tomboy watches. Never guessed it could be a GOOD
> thing." Ranma began to snicker.
>
> "Magical?"
>
> "Heh. Yeah. You and me. Magical Girls!" And the redhead
> fell down, in hysterical laughter-- not so much because of the humor,
> but rather now that the adrenaline rush from the battle was over,
> she had surrendered herself to well deserved hysteria.
extra space.
> Sailor Moon blinked. She'd never actually thought of herself
> as a Magical Girl... but she supposed that was the case. She
> certainly had all the required paraphernalia for the role. Even the
> cute mascot. This person didn't, however.
Well, there's P-ch--
Ryoga: NO WAY!
> "You don't look like a 'magical girl', miss..."
>
> "Ranma," the redhead replied without thinking.
>
> "That's not a lot of a codename, is it?"
Sug: "...much of a... "
> "Code-- Naw, that's just my name. And your's is?"
"yours"
> "A secret. But you can call me Sailor Moon. And you really
> should have a codename, you know. Heck, Venus has two. Sailor Venus
> and Sailor V-- well, she doesn't use Sailor V anymore, so I guess
> she only has one right now."
>
> "Um. Yeah, sure. If you say so."
>
> Sailor Moon started to tap her chin, in contemplation.
> "Now... what would be a good name for you? And you really need a
> better costume, you know."
>
> Ranma started to back off. "Um. I'm fine with my ordinary
> clothes. I really don't need anything-- Wha-ha-ha-haiiiee!"
>
> Backing off might be a good idea. Backing off and not noticing
> a small fountain that the Daimon had heated up during the fight
> wasn't. As Ranma stumbled and fell into the very warm water, her--
> or rather his most embarrassing secret was exposed. And here it
> would come-- ridicule, or horror, or accusations--
Sug: "...exposed. He braced himself for what would come next:
ridicule, or horror..."
> "Wow. How did you do that? For that matter, why? I mean,
> turning into a boy kinda seems like a strange power."
Just ask Birdy. Or Maze.
> Or something completely unexpected by anyone not familar with
> Sailor Moon, who was pretty much the very embodiment of love,
> kindness, and acceptance.
And (healthy) perversion. See, if she could figure out this power, and
apply it to Rei and Mamoru, it would solve her biggest romantic headache...
> ####
>
> "Too long to explain here and now."
<snerk>
> ####
>
> "I know you. You're Moonshadow."
>
> Ranma blinked. Sailor Moon had tagged her with the joking name,
> after Ranma had made a comment that if she WERE a magical girl, she'd
> be in Sailor Moon's shadow. But this girl-- about thirteen and in an
> outfit that made Sailor Moon's uniform seem normal (And respectable--
I don't think "and" should be capped.
> what was with the cat motif anyway? Sick and Wrong, in her opinion,
> had been redefined) with the odd staff and her own personal one-girl
> film crew knew the name.
<boggle> Sakura? Wow, this is approaching MegaXover territory.
> "Um. How do you know that?"
>
> "I've met Sailor Moon a couple of times. She mentioned you when
> I used the Fight Card... She said you were better."
Clow Reed: Now wait just one darn minute, here...
> "Heh. I ain't gonna contradict her."
>
> Ranma was about to leave-- hey, helping this little girl who
> somehow held power that matched Sailor Moon's had been kind of fun
> while she'd been buying some new Chinese shirts-- when the camera
> girl strode up to her and started writing in a small notebook.
> "I need your phone number, Moonshadow-san."
Yep, that's Tomoyo all over.
> "Um. What for?"
>
> "When you do special things, you should wear special clothes.
> I saw a movie that reminds me of how you fight, I'm so INSPIRED..."
Whoa.
> And a week later Tomoyo had delivered the first iteration
> of the Moonshadow uniform, patterned after the styles used in the
> motion picture, "The Matrix".
Oy.
> ####
>
> "Besides, it's not really important, Wan."
Yaright.
> ####
>
> "Whew. And Kuno thinks he knows how to use a sword..."
>
> "Thanks a lot, miss..."
>
> "Call me Moonshadow." And dressed the part too, due to a second
> meeting with Sakura Kinamoto and that strange girl Tomoyo's
> insistance that she try the outfit out for size. When a monster
Sug: "on for size"
> that made the things the Sailors fought look normal fell through
> a hole in the air, pursued by three girls in partial armor and school
> uniforms-- a damn odd combination if you asked HER-- well, a Martial
> Artist was supposed to protect the weak, right? Not that Sakura-chan
> was weak, or these girls, but the passers-by, well, there wasn't
> any real choice?
Sug: "was there any real choice?" or "there wasn't any real choice,
was there?"
Rayearth, now? Juuban's getting crowded.
> "Okay. I'm Hikaru Shidou... and I'm really sorry about the
> monster. For some reason it followed us from Cephiro. I...
> Umi-chan, Fuu-chan, what are you looking at?"
>
> And after some embarrassed explanations, both Hikaru and the
> so-called Moonshadow were regarding two of three Magic Knights with
> considerable cold scorn.
>
> They did not look ANYTHING alike. But, just to make certain
> that their not looking anything alike was pointed out with more
> focus, Moonshadow changed her hairstyle a bit.
Obviously, they've never read "Duet of Pigtails."
> ####
>
> "What's important is what we've got to do-- by all the Kami and
> the Bhuddas, what are THEY doing here?"
Right now, there are so many candidates for "THEY," I'm not even going
to make an attempt.
> Moonshadow had expected the Sailor Senshi, of course. After all,
> their leader had invited her to this "event".
>
> The unexpected sight of Sakura Kinamoto, and her boyfriend
> Shaoran Li-- two of the most potent magicians in Japan, especially
> considering that Sakura was probably the most powerful in the WORLD--
> was somehing of a start. So was the presence of the Magic Knights
> of Cephiro, including by definition Hikaru Shidou, who as the Pillar
> of that world (For all intents and purposes it's guiding Goddess)
> somehow held considerable power in this one.
>
> Moonshadow was only glad that that annoying Yohko twip hadn't
> shown up. She was on good terms with most of the loose Magical
> Girl "sorority", but the Devil Hunter just rubbed her the wrong way.
Awww...
> Eiyu-Gos, however was in a state of mild shock, and somewhere
> inside his heroic mind, terror. Between the supernatural beauty
> and power of the Sailor Senshi-- and there was a LOT of them, nine
> as best as he could count-- and the equally palpable sense of power
> coming from the girl with the odd staff and the one who bore a
> passing resemblance to Ranma-chan he had a feeling that he was
> completely outclassed in every way.
Like I said, good instincts.
> And then he became aware that in her own way, Ranma-- or if you
> would, Moonshadow-- had very much the same sense of power. Not,
> perhaps, in sheer raw quantity, but rather tightly focused and
> precisely directed. This was something he'd never seen before when
> it came to the Martial Artist... a true gathering of equals.
ObBraveheart: "Who ARE you talking to?" "The Almighty -- An Irishman
must needs speak with God in order to hold conversation with an equal."
> In other words, he was surrounded by a huge group of girls--
> of varying ages, but all more than comely, and all capable of erasing
> his existance with a thought. For a moment, the newest hero
> considered going somewhere safer. Like, maybe, to the Amazons.
Massive paradigm shift. (:)
> It was at that moment he realised that Moonshadow wasn't THERE.
> As he found himself approaching the massed magical girls, panic began
> to grip his heart. What was he supposed to do now? Sensei was
> missing! He had no idea how to handle anything like this-- for the
> sake of heaven, who WOULD?
Me, I'd run like heck, since this assemblage represents some kind of
Critical Mass of heroism... meaning that Something REALLY Bad is about
to come up...
> And so, he attempted to go with his instincts. Since even his
> instincts were overwhelmed, what he did next was oddly appropriate.
>
> As the various females turned to the only not-female there, with
> the exception of the aforementioned Shaoran Li and the quite
> enigmatic Tuxedo Kamen-- Oh, JOY, not only were there a packof scary
"pack of"
> women, there was a MAN whose unconcious grace and nobility made him
> look plain and dumpy in only the way a true prince could-- and of
> COURSE he was at Sailor Moon's side-- he found himself rubbing the
> back of his head in mixed embarrassment and confusion.
>
> "Um... I'm, well, here with my sensei, except that she's sort of
> vanished on me... and... I'm afraid I'm not really sure why she wants
> me here..."
>
> And his curse-given flair abandoning him in the presence of the
> assembled powers, he bowed-- with grace, true, for he could never
> be awkward in the matter of courtesy, and introduced himself.
>
> "I'm Tenorioh Wan. Ah. I'm really very sorry about this."
Full...circle.
> There was a quiet giggle from... nowhere. "Oh, he'll do well
> enough, my friends. Although I am surprised to find so many of us
> here..."
>
> A swirl of darkness seemed to seep from the shadow of a nearby
> trashcan, to resolve into the form of the Moonshadow. To anyone
> there, including "Tenorioh Wan", it seemed like a strange,
> supernatural form of materialisation. To Moonshadow (and Sailor
> Moon, who was in on the secret) it was an extension of concepts
> theorised by the Umisenken, a bit of ninjitsu trickery, and a few
> concepts that Ranma had been making for his own addition to the
> Musabetou Kakutou Saotome Ryu, the Tsukikage No Ken... the Moonshadow
> style.
Speaking of, where IS Elsa Bibat, and when's the next chapter of
"Dances" coming out?
> It was, in many ways, similar to the umisenken... the same base
> theory, but different enough in execution that it was not sealed.
> (Not that the umisenken WAS sealed. Genma sealed it, true... and
> then unsealed it long enough to teach Ranma the basics. What Genma
> never considered was that Ranma had NOT sealed it... but instead
> used it as a base for an improved version.)
Sug: "REsealed"
> In essence, it was the Umisenken revised... to be flashy,
> stylish, and highly deceptive in nature. It was a martial arts
> school designed to simulate the abilities of a magical girl. A bit
> frivolous, perhaps... but it served it's purpose.
>
> As Moonshadow once again appeared from nowhere, confounding
> Mercury's expected attempt to figure out how she did that, she moved
> to Wan's side. This, to her chagrin, was a minor faux pas.
Sug: "...chagrin, turned out to be a..."
> "About TIME," grinned Sailor Jupiter.
>
> "About time for what?" The leather-clad not-really-magical
> girl blinked.
>
> "We were wondering when you'd finally get a boyf--" Sailor Venus
AIIEE! Goodbye, Mina, it was good knowing you.
> stopped speaking as Moonshadow suddenly appeared in her face,
> scowling.
>
> "I'll say this once. He's not my boyfriend. He's my apprentice.
> No, he's not avaailable, because he's in training. And we're not
> here for that sort of chat, are we? I was informed that this would
> be the last one, almost certainly. And I STILL want to know why the
> Captor and the Knights are here. Is it THAT big?"
>
> Sailor Moon coughed. "Well, it IS that big, but they showed
> on their own. They could feel it even more than Mars and Neptune."
Sug: "...it, even more strongly than Mars and/or Neptune."
Well, that's... big. "Big" in the "Douglas Adams attempts to describe
how big space really is and then gives up in disgust before nipping off
to the pub for a pint and some skittles" sense, that is. This promises
to be Very Interesting indeed....
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