Sorry, been a bit busy getting back to responding to this:
David McMillan wrote:
Amazing. I suddenly have a twelve-hour work shift where I'm
essentially prohibited from doing anything. Now maybe I can get some
C&C done!
Lucky you. Hope you can keep it up. :)
> two
> were drunk by their incoherent laughter and swaying as they made their
> way
> down the street.
Sug: "drunk, judging by their"
Used pretty much all of the grammar suggestions.
mock
> the movie best. Their contest had made for a lot of angry stares by
the
> other patrons of the film, mostly girls, but both he and Kachiko had
too
> much fun to care what a bunch of shoujo fangirls thought.
Look! It's MST3&1/2K!
Yep. Pretty much.
> The sun had gone down. Ranma had to move under a streetlight to read
his
> watch. "Hmm. We're running a little late. Why don't we cut through the
> park?" He pointed to a walkway that led into the park, though it was
> quickly
> obscured by the trees lining the path.
Danger, Ranma Saotome! Danger! Danger!
Yep. Although not the kind he's thinking of.
> Kachiko tensed up slightly. "You want to take me through the park at
this
> time of night?"
>
> "Why not?" Ranma asked innocently.
"After all, if there's anyone good anough to mug you, *I'll*
take care
of 'em!"
Heh. There is that.
> After a moment of consideration, Kachiko chuckled. "Yeah, knowing you,
> you
> probably don't have a clue."
>
> "Clue to what?"
'nuff said.
Pretty much.
> They had only made their way a short distance through the park when
> Ranma's
> senses went on alert. He could feel the presence of people off the
path
> hidden out of sight, a sure sign of trouble. So they had wandered
into an
> ambush.
Somehow, I don't think that's an ambush....
I do believe you're right.
any
> harm. It was the manly thing to do. Besides, if he let Kachiko do it,
> she'd
> brag about how she protected him, and that wouldn't do at all.
And that was the *really* important thing.
Yep. Man has to have his pride, after all.
> They continued walking, Ranma wondering when the ambush would be
> tripped. He
> was beginning to think the group was too scared to move when he heard
a
> rustling sound come from a set of bushes a small distance away. It was
> followed by a woman's gasp. So, they had already found a victim.
Naivete, thy name is Ranma.
In this case, the gal wants to be 'victimized'. ^_^
>
> Kachiko froze for a second, startled at his declaration. By the time
she
> came out of it, he was already halfway there. "Wait, Ranma, I don't
think
> you want to do that!"
I *know* he doesn't. But do characters ever listen to their
C&Cers?
Noooooooooooo!
It's more fun that way, though.
> More slowly this time, Ranma walked out from the bushes, a red
> handprint on
> his cheek.
That actually went surprisingly well.
Ranma might beg to differ.
> "I told you you didn't want to do that," Kachiko teased in a sing-song
> voice.
>
> "How was I to know the park's a place to do perverted stuff at night?"
> Ranma
> grumbled.
Happousai: "I"ve been *Trying* to teach you. But would you
listen?
Nooooooooo..."
Well, listening to Happi isn't usually real high on the priority list for
most.
>
> "I don't want to do anything perverted with you," Ranma said gruffly
> as he
> continued on through the park.
<snerk> You know, that's one of those lines that dooms you, no
matter
how the woman feels. They always hear the emphsasis as being on "you."
Yep. The classic no win question, sort of like 'Do you enjoy beating your
wife?'
> Walking hurriedly, the two left the park and emerged close to the
> restaurant
> Ranma had made the reservations at. Once free from the uncomfortable
> environment of the perverted playground the park transformed into at
> night,
Look, Ma! Alliteration!
I so rarely use it, but this time it was cried out for.
> in very intimate moment, with the girl in a compromising position. For
> some
> bizarre reason, since that encounter, he felt strange when he looked
at
> Kachiko. A part of him wished he could end the date now and escape the
> cause
> of his reaction, while another part was reluctant to do so.
Good grief! He IS normal!
Relatively speaking.
> It mattered little. He had promised to go out on a date, and Kachiko
> wanted
> to be here with him. He would live up to his obligation, and be done
> with it
> and never date her again, even if they were having a good time
> together. It
> just made things too complicated.
Yeah. That'll last.
Hope springs eternal for us all. That would be too easy on him, though.
> pocket and pulled out what he thought was the folded over note and
> showed it
> to the man.
uh oh.
Yep
> Kachiko hadn't already slapped him for its presence. Cringing, he
> looked and
> noted her head was turned away as she examined one of the nearby
> paintings.
> However, it was turning back toward him.
Cue slo-mo! Cue "Jaws" music!
"C'mon, Ryouga, this is when I need you to show up. Ryouga?
Mousse?
Herb? Saffron? Happousai? ANYBODY?!?!?!?"
Ranma will get himself out of this situation. It happens from time to time.
> Thinking fast, Ranma snapped at the maitre'd, "How dare you imply my
> date is
> a loose woman!"
Brilliant. Who are you, and what have you done with Ranma?
Kachiko's sneaky. A little bit is rubbing off on him.
> "Yeah, apologize for saying I'm sleazy," Kachiko seconded.
She has NO idea what's going on, but she's sure willing to hop
on the
train in passing.
Ranma appears to be defending her honor. It's not an opportunity to pass up.
> The maitre'd paled. "Sir, I can explain. I asked for this man's
> reservation
> number and he flashed me-"
"How dare you call me a flasher!" POW!
Heh
> "He called my date a tramp!" Ranma interjected. "I demand an apology."
I actually feel a little sorry for the maitre'd here. Of
course, he
shouldn't have been snooty in the first place.
Yep. He was asking for it.
>
> "Offering free booze is always the best form of apology," Kachiko said
> enthusiastically. She looped her arm through Ranma's. "I must say,
Ranma,
> that was very noble of you to get so outraged and stick up for me like
> that.
> I am impressed."
Karmic backlash... building.
Well, things hit the fan by the end, all right.
> "Ah, thanks." Ranma gave a nervous laugh. That had been a close one.
He
> wondered how many more he'd have before the date was over.
Ranma saves himself from a social faux pas by *talking.* This
means
there's a major karmic backlash a'comin'.
Heh.
> xxxxxxxxxxx
>
> "Yes, alcohol makes everything better," Kachiko slurred slightly as
she
> drained her glass for the sixth time in a half hour and set it back
> down on
> the table.
Uh oh.
She's a heavy drinker. She likes her alcohol.
"Why, I
> bet if I was to give you a lap dance, you wouldn't try a thing. Want
> to find
> out?" She started to rise out of her chair.
"Okay, Ryouga, NOW would be a good time!"
Nah. Tarou will mess things up. I need to bring him back since I introed him
a ways ago.
> Her slightly loud voice, as well as the topic, was attracting a great
> deal
> of unwanted attention. "It was an accident. I didn't mean to do it,"
> Ranma
> explained as much to the other patrons as to her.
<snerk>
Who knows whose ears word will get back to? :)
> Ranma was about to protest when Kachiko slouched in her chair. He
> couldn't
> understand what was going on until he felt a bare toe rub itself up
> and down
> a leg.
whose leg?
Ranma's. Will make clear.
> Then there was a thud as Kachiko fell out of her chair. All Ranma
> could see
> of her was the top of her head.
>
> "My chair moved," she said from the floor.
Manager: "I'm sorry, we just waxed the floor."
Heh
> "Probably," Kachiko agreed as she set her chair back up and sat down
> properly in it once again. "I usually don't get giddy like this unless
> I'm
> having a good time."
Hint hint.
Actually she's being straightforward and not subtle at all.
> Kachiko whispered, "I'll let you in on a secret. You're doing so good,
> you've now got the inside line on Tachi-kun."
>
> Ranma started to smirk. He was distracted enough that he didn't react
> before
> Kachiko brought her face closer and gave him a peck on the cheek.
Nosebleed, Ranma Saotome! Nosebleed, Nosebleed!
Nah. Now if she flashed him some breast, maybe.
> She retreated back to her seat before he could offer a word of
protest.
> "Relax, I won't try for more than first base. I can tell I'm not the
only
> one who wants to take things really slow."
If Really=Dead, yeah.
Heh.
>
> As Kachiko began to pass by him, she leaned forward and whispered, "By
> the
> way, you're awful cute when you blush." Then left before he could say
> anything again.
Turnabout.
Yep.
> "Staying at home is definitely a lot less stressful." He drained a
> glass of
> wine himself as he tried to figure out which it was.
Amen, brother.
Yeah, but it tends to be a good kind of stress with the potential of a good
pay off.
> endearing, as well as distracting, traits. There were times when the
> frustration of trying to anticipate his reaction was so bad she would
> just
> as soon be done with him save for one problem.
>
> She really liked it when he called her cute.
Yep, she's Akane's mother, all right.
That and Ranma is unintentionally charming to many.
> "Idiot," she muttered under her breath.
>
> "I agree. Let's leave this loser so you can take up with a real man
> instead
> of the weenie fem-boy."
Huh? Yak-boy? What hole did YOU crawl out of?
He's been waiting for an opportunity to grab her once she was clear of the
Tendou home (and away from Soun's demon head)
> She turned in anger upon him. "Look, you creep, at least Ranma isn't
so
> sexually confused he'd enter a ladies room, and that's saying a lot
> since he
> turns into a girl. So why don't you make like a leaf and leave?"
She hasn't read "Girl Days."
No. I haven't. Tried to but couldn't get into it. Not my kind of humor.
And that was BAD.
She does have a lousy sense of humor.
> Tarou cringed. "That was just awful. We're really going to have to do
> something about that sense of humor of yours if there's going to be
> anything
> between us."
Other than about three feet of armor plate, you mean?
Heh.
> "Ranma appreciates my sense of humor, and there's nothing between us!"
> While
> the former was a lie, there was no need for Tarou to know it. And the
> latter
> was definitely true.
In vino, veritas? Oh, nothing between her and Tarou! I thought
she
was talking about Ranma.
It is a bit convoluted, but since she's been drinking, I think it works.
> "Yes, well about that nothing between us bit." Tarou held up his left
> hand
> far out to his side and wiggled his fingers.
>
> Kachiko looked at them in confusion. "What the hell is that supposed
to-"
"A distraction."
And it works too.
> "Let's work on that, shall we?" Tarou hefted her unconscious form over
> his
> shoulder and exited the restroom.
One of his springs must have inlcluded Drowned Neanderthal.
Heh. Well, sometimes the most direct course is the most effective.
> "Nah, I'm being silly," Ranma decided as he looked over his shoulder
> just in
> time to see Tarou head through the swinging doors to the kitchen with
> Kachiko slung over his shoulder.
"Okay, no I'm not."
It's hard to tell when one's life is like Ranma's.
> Ranma sighed. "It's never the easy way, is it?" At least he wouldn't
> have to
> worry about what Kachiko was going to try to do to him next. It was
> almost a
> relief that Tarou had ended things predictably.
<snerk>
Well, you have to admit, it's not an unheard of thins.
> "Shit!" he cursed under his breath as he saw Tarou's cursed form
> flying off
> with Kachiko cradled in his arms. He had forgotten that little detail.
That's a heck of a thing to forget.
Can't think of everything all the time.
catch
> Tarou and keep him from doing whatever terrible things he had planned
for
> the girl he wanted so badly.
Yeah, he's going to make her listen to his homemade demo tape of
him
yodelling until her ears bleed.
I know people who have singing voices that can do that, sadly enough.
>
> Yoji pulled out his radio and said, "Captain, a large beastie just
> landed on
> our deck."
Beastie? What is this guy, a Japanese Scot?
He's from the Japanese equivalent of Scotland. Yeah, that's the ticket.
> The radio crackled in response, "It's probably a dock inspector. Just
> bribe
> him to look the other way."
Dock inspectors are large beasties? Okay, I can see that.
Sometimes they seem that way. :)
> "He's abducting her?"
>
> "That sounds reasonable. Now show him to his room." The radio went
dead.
Gotta love working with professionals.
Heh.
> It took her a moment to collect her muddled thoughts. What was the
last
> thing she remembered? Ranma, the whip cream and... no, wait, that was
the
> dream she had before awakening. No way was he that inventive with an
ice
> cream scooper and hazelnuts. It was something else. She had gone to
O_o
Don't you love innuendo that can mean just about anything?
>
> Tarou breathed a sigh of relief. "Good. As much as I love you, I'm not
> into
> bondage or kinky stuff like that. If you were, I'd have to rethink our
> relationship."
She had a real opportunity there to get rid of Tarou. Of
course, the
problem with that approach is that he might heave decided he loves her
enough to rise to the challenge....
Yeah. Then she's really in for it then.
> denial on one or two of the people's parts. Then after we've shared
some
> bonding experiences and stuff, we'll grow closer after our trials and
> tribulations and eventually proclaim our love for one another. That's
> what
> makes cool romances like that worthwhile."
...this guy reads Victorian bodice-ripper romances, doesn't he?
Or standard manga romance plots. :)
>
> Yoji stopped directing the crane, which had picked up the last of
their
> cargo, a fifteen by fifteen foot box container suspended above the
> deck, and
Yoji was battening down hatches after "the last of the cargo" was
loaded when Tarou landed.
Oops. Right.
Also, International Standard Shipping Containers have different
dimensions, somewhat smaller than a rail freight car. Not that that's
important....
True. I was uncertain of how to phrase it, though.
> That served as a signal for the rest of the crewmen to descend on
Ranma,
> trying to gang tackle him all at once.
>
> Ranma finished the dozen large men off in under a minute.
He's slipping.
Oh, wait. You didn't say *how far* under a minute. Very good,
carry on.
Okay..
>
> "Looks like you're all warmed up. Ready for the main event?" Tarou
> dramatically cracked his knuckles again, since Ranma hadn't had the
> benefit
> of hearing him do it earlier.
<eyeroll>
Got to be dramatic. Wouldn't be a good fight without the drama.
>
> Tarou looked aghast at the accusation. "I am going to do no such
thing."
And what makes this *really* funny is that he's being honest.
Yep.
>
> Tarou gained a crafty smile. "Oh, from what I understand, most of the
> girls
> that are currently after you started off disliking you for one reason
or
> another."
The heck of it is, he's got a point.
Ranma: "But your *approach* is all wrong! I didn't *force*
them to go
anywhere with me, I just kept letting them beat me up until their closet
masochistic tendencies converted their hatred into... wait a minute...."
Heh
> Ranma became flustered. He came up with, "Kodachi didn't."
Nice comeback. Not.
Well, she did like him from the get go.
> testy, but as the couple gets to know one another, feelings blossom
> and the
> two fall in love. I'm just following the usual tried and true course."
And the Akane/Ranma parallel flies right past Ranma...
Make you have to rethink things, doesn't it?
>
> "I can tame her if I want!" Ranma jumped down to land next to Tarou,
That one ranks pretty high on the "stupid things to say" list.
That's what happens when one damages Ranma's pride.
> Tarou sneered. "Get real. You wouldn't know what to do with a woman if
> she
> stripped naked and began bouncing on your lap, Fem-boy." Tarou went
for a
> three punch combination.
Happousai: "I've been TRYING!"
Heh
> For the first time since the fight began Tarou became angry. "It's
not my
> fault I can't stand my name. Besides, I don't care if Kachi calls me
> by it.
> It's obviously a sign of true love, so quit interfering." Tarou tried
to
> attack Ranma again.
Man, he really does have it bad.
Yep. To Tarou, it is true love.
> inside of his vest. "Hey, Fem-boy, want to see a new trick?"
>
> Ranma tensed up. There was a good fifteen feet separating him and
> Tarou, so
> he should have time to react to anything the guy had planned with the
> short
> stick.
Which, of course, means that....
Yep
> The stick shrank down to regular staff size. Tarou began twirling it
> around.
> "I got this off some crappy fire breathing martial arts monk that was
> flying
> around on a silly cloud. It's kind of neat, though. Want to see what
> else it
> can do?"
The *original* Son Goku.
Sanzo, from Read or Die! OVA. He aped Goku's ablities.
ground
> due to the increasing length of the staff, as well as the blur it was
> in the
> hands of Tarou. The Chinese youth displayed an expertise with the
weapon
> Ranma hadn't thought he possessed.
Yeah, schools for telescoping bo staffs are pretty rare, unless
you
visit Babylon 5.
And Tarou's just plain talented. :)
> brought
> forward. The staff caught Tarou in the side of the ribs, but he
> brought an
> arm around it, trapping the weapon and pinning it to his side. With
That could work, but wouldn't it have broken his ribs in the
process?
He's a tough one, and Ranma wasn't at the apex of his swing, so the force
wasn't maximized.
dance
> began with Tarou trying to hit Ranma, but only succeeding in blowing a
> series of holes in the floor as he chased him.
Ranma Saotome's Lord of the Dance (of Battles).
Wait a minute... holes? In the deck? Um... guys..
Yep. it's coming.
..
> Saotome. Nothing can-" His cursing was abruptly stopped as what little
> remained of the metal flooring buckled and a huge spray of seawater
> burst up
> through the hole where Tarou's last blow had landed.
Cue "Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald." Or maybe "32 Down on the
Robert
Mackenzie."
I always liked 'Wreck'. Nice ballad.
> the metal of the hold or impact with it. Apparently Saotome was so
> tired, he
> had missed completely.
Um. I think there's still a craneload suspended somewhere...
Yep. Had that set up for this.
> Unleashing a gruff chuckle, Tarou looked up, intent on flying through
the
> hole and finishing the fight. Instead, all he saw was the bottom of
> something large and heavy falling toward him.
It's that expression of dawning comprehension that I live for.
Heh.
> xxxxxxxxxxxx
>
> Ranma smirked as he heard the grunt of pain come from Tarou as the
large
> container struck him squarely in the head. There was a loud crash as
both
> beast and container landed hard on the bottom of the ship.
Would be a splash, wouldn't it? With the hold partially filled
with water?
Hmm. Probably. Ought to add that.
> Then there was the sound of more metal buckling and a geyser of water
> shooting up through the hole in the deck.
"Cap'n? You know that little flooding problem we had? It ain't
so
little anymore..."
Heh
>
> "Oh crap," Ranma said as he ran into the interior of the ship.
That's one way to put it.
Concise and to the point.
> "Ohhh. That's really not good." Panicked, she tried rolling to the
set of
> steps Tarou had taken up and out of the room. If she tried hard
> enough, she
> thought she could make like a Slinky and inch her way up the steps.
o_O Now there's an image.
Excel from Excel Saga could probably manage it.
> would-be Casanova hitting on her, which was as reflexive as breathing
to
> him, she had opted to flee and head toward her house. Just as she was
> nearing it, everything went blank and she found herself lying on the
> ground
> in the middle of the sidewalk.
Hmmm... so was it Icky's limo that would have hit her originally?
No. She was just avoiding Icky.
> Strange things happen to me all the time. I'd say I was due for a
bout of
> temporary amnesia. At least I haven't had something like a personality
> inversion with Yumi happen. Now that would be really strange."
Nerima. Love it or leave it.
Yep.
> restoration. Her family had lots of geniuses, as evidenced by the
> number of
> things they loaned to Wakaba so she could show them off to Kachiko.
Kryptonite lasers, Illumidium Q-35 Space Modulators, various ACME
products...
The latter were always good for a laugh.
That
> prototype Battle Dogi had been pretty neat. It had allowed Wakaba to
> actualize her potential as a martial artist, and work out with Kachiko
> in a
> fun sparring match that ended with the Battle Dogi being damaged and
> Wakaba
> having one of her arms pulled out of her socket when it malfunctioned.
Dislocated shoulder, ITYM.
Okay
>
> Her diatribe ended abruptly as there was a sensation of falling
followed
> by....
Interesting. Looks like we're finally finding out what those
episodes
are about.
Yep. Been building up to that for some time. I figured the time Nodoka saw
her fading would be a giveaway.
> time something different happened. She had been cast into past with no
> memories of her time spent in the future. It was only upon her return
> to the
> future that her memories of that time came back to her.
>
> It took only a moment to make the logical conclusion to what it all
> meant.
That she needed to find The Doctor and join his band of-- no,
wait,
wrong series.
Fraid so. This doesn't really crossover with much.
and
> die before her life even had a chance to start. She would lose
everything
> she cared about, and it would only be replaced with ashes.
Well... there *are* compensations. But she's not going to see
that
right now.
To her, it's inconceivable that she would like being a mother. It was
something the 'original' her warmed up to only after a good bit of time.
> unrelenting stream. It wasn't fair. If anything could be called Hell,
> this
> was it. The detailed knowledge that one was doomed to lose everything
and
> there was no way to avert it.
Okay. For the first time in this whole series, I am now feeling
real
sympathy for Kachi. That sucks. DB, I hate you.
Cool. I am a person worthy of ire. ^_^
> The water rose higher, submerging her body halfway. She could have
> continued
> wiggling toward the steps and seek higher ground, hoping someone would
> find
> and rescue her, but what was the point? She was damned anyway. Move or
> stay,
> if the outcome was the same, what difference did it make? None at all.
> She
> remained motionless and allowed herself to be submerged in the brine.
Despair is an ugly thing.
Yep. Comes part and parcel with being a human.
>
> "He killed Hope." Kachiko knew Ranma wouldn't understand. She didn't
> care in
> the slightest. No one could understand.
Typical teenage complaint. But this time, with some validity.
Since she knows what's going to happen, yep.
> silent, the same could not be said for the rest of the ship as the
> sound of
> more metal tearing filled the air. The sound shook him out of the
spell
> woven by Kachiko's inexplicable actions. "I don't care what you say
about
> me. I'm getting you out of here."
That's our Ranma. Goal-orientation to the point of tunnel
vision.
In this case, a good thing.
> heavy struck the deck directly overhead. Then the ceiling gave way
and
> came
> crashing toward Ranma. He tensed up to leap, but the water pooled in
the
> bottom made the deck slippery and he fell.
Where's Kachi? Is he carrying her?
Not yet. She was a ways away on the deck. He stopped as soon as he saw her.
> the water merely rose up until it nearly filled her nostrils. She sat
> up as
> best as she could, catching a breath as she pulled and strained until
it
> felt as though every muscle in her body would tear free from bone.
Wait a minute, a couple pages back this chapter was a comedy!
What
happened? How did things go so bad, so fast?
I like mixing humor with seriousness, and this series was always going to
end on a serious note. It's just a question of how serious...
>
> position on the floor, but it couldn't have been more than a thousand
> pounds
> or so, and most of it hadn't fallen directly on Ranma.
Don't worry! It's only *half* a ton!
And not in one piece. You can move half a ton quick if its in small enough
pieces.
> mask. But the worst part was the small length of pipe sticking up
through
> her body, near her kidney. It had been driven vertically through her
side
> and into the deck below her. Blood flowed freely from the wound.
Okay, we are now *officially* outside of comedy territory.
Yep.
> Kachiko wasn't squeamish, but seeing the impaled girl nearly made her
> throw
> up. She had to repress the urge. Instead she forced herself to use the
> ruins
> of her fingers to grip the metal protruding from Ranma's flank. She
bent
> low, her back sending jolts of pain from her sore muscles pleading
> with her
> to stop, if only by making her pass out. Her body's aches joined in
the
> chorus of protest, but she ignored everything other than removing the
> projection of metal from Ranma's body.
You're really not supposed to do that. But in this case, since
the
pipe seems to be stapling Ranma to the deck....
and the water is flowing in, it would take longer to bleed to death than
drown.
> was a loud explosion behind her. Heat seared her back and she was
> lifted up
> the floor and through the air. There was the sensation of something
hard
> hitting her from the front.
That's right, they're near the engine spaces. Boiler must have
finally
flooded.
Yep.
>
> She had to rescue him. It was a competition between which would finish
> him
> off first: drowning or bleeding to death. She couldn't let him die.
> She was
> doomed, but there was no reason for him to be as well. No one deserved
> to be
> damned the way Kachiko was.
And now I can't help but root for her. Dammit all, DB....
I did like going against the grain in that she's too hurt to go move. It's
going to be up to Ranma to save the rest of the day.
> pitiful thing in her life, to know what she had to do and be unable
to do
> it. It was the first time she knew she had limitations she could not
> hope to
> overcome. She sobbed at her useless mortality.
And another lesson here.
Yep.
> moving
> past the concept of agony and into another state of mind where things
> were
> muted, like a faded water-color. Everything took a dreamlike quality.
Ah, shock. Ain't it wonderful?
Yep. Makes everything less.
just
> imagination. The ship, the explosions, the time shifting, nothing but
a
> twisted dream, and she'd wake up in her home, in her proper time, and
> laugh
> with Sakura about this tomorrow, especially the part about her best
> friend
> marrying an ugly man.
If things end that suddenly, there will be mobs with torches and
pitchforks marching on DB's door. I have foreseen it!
Nope. Still a little more to go. Just need to hear back from the prereaders
before I can post. It's all written out.
> wanted
> to know.
"Hey, on a clear day, you CAN see forever -- whups, wrong fic."
Heh.
> Ranma kept walking, until they reached a wide gangplank that, despite
the
> slow sinking of the ship, was still connected to the dock, though at a
> steep
> upward angle rather than the lower one it had started out with.
You know, it just now occurred to me that the water that close to the
docks probably isn't deep enough for the ship to sink completely -- but
once the keel touched bottom, there's a fair chance it would just turn
turtle. But that would make things a little *too* complicated for Ranma
and Kachi...
Yep.
> Ranma's eyes turned away from looking ahead, and seemed to suddenly
> understand that there was someone over her shoulder. She looked at
> Kachiko
> and said, "I told you this would be the most unforgettable date you've
> ever
> been on."
<facefault>
Well, it was.
> Then her eyes rolled into the back of her head, and she slumped to the
> ground, dumping Kachiko unceremoniously on her back.
And driving the ends of her broken ribs into her lungs, no doubt.
Just bruised. Most of them, but only bruised.
> Kachiko stared up at the sky. She had to admit, she was guilty of
> underestimating Ranma. He had given her the most interesting date she
had
> ever been on.
She's still thinking about *that,* after everyth-- no, never mind.
Ranma was doing it too. I'd almost say that these two deserve each
other....
Ranma did prod her with his comment.
> Deciding now was a good time to pass out, she did so.
And about darn time, too!
I forsee at least a week of hospital time for both of them, given how
much damage they took. More, if Ranma's kidney actually got puncutred
<shudder>.
Nope. Missed anything vital.
But I have a hunch that Kachi's little "temporal problem" is
going to come to a head sooner than that.
You'll see. We do jump ahead at the start of next chapter.
Ugly thought: just how close are Kachi's current wounds to the ones
that forced her to give up the Art originally? Or to having the same
end effect -- like, say, whatever she did to her back while freeing
Ranma? That could be one way of fixing the time stream w/o breaking
Akane's wish -- Kachi never had that first car accident, but still ended
up in the same boat....
These aren't the same injuries and she'll recover from them. Long lists of
lesser injuries can have the same effect as a big one when it comes to pain.
Thanks for the extensive comments. They were very helpful. Improved things a
lot.
DB Sommer
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