You know, I don't generally comment publicly, since that usually implies a

long,

drawn-out, detailed line-by-liner... but the topic rather caught my

attention.

Profanity may be crude and vulgar, but it always does the job. ^_-

There's nothing more fun than messing with time around such an unyielding
character as good 'ol Fanfic Convention Sailor Pluto!

Indeed.

It's quite nice to have a contrast now and again with the Title Character.

A

professional, collected demeanor is probably as opposite to Usagi as

you'll

find in a main character.

*nod* Not to mention it's a lot more fun to mess with someone who's not
accustomed to being Messed With.

I mean, if we switched things around and had Usagi... or better yet,

Minako as

Guardian of Time (fully empowered by all the intricacies of convention),

we'd

have all kinds of nifty, funky stuff going on.

I don't think we'd even have a universe anymore. @_@

Gotta admit:  Time is bumpy.  You need a fine ship to sail it.

Pity most time travellers have clunky, barely-functional lowriders with bad
re-entry issues.

Time is fun when you compress it to wild and crazy standards.  Most of the
better (or, at least well-known) authors have a way to address it.  I

rather

liked Pratchett's handling of it in Thief of Time.  But, that's another
temporal theory.

Personally, I like to think of time as the flatulence of an aardvark. But
then, I'm known to be a little off-kilter.

I wonder where the Temporal Headaches(TM) for Sailor Pluto originated from

in

fan fiction.  I mean, when we have her viewing Time, it's only logical

that she

should have them... but when did they become Convention?

No clue, but they make sense.

...that something felt very, very wrong just now.

It's the lack of proper facilities in the Infinite Ether between the Gates

of

Time.  All at once, it's been a nanosecond as well as a dozen millenia

since

she's had a chance to visit one.  Having one of those spread-time

continuums

rather complicates things in that matter.

*snicker*

Frowning, Setsuna invoked the power of the Garnet Orb atop her staff.
Infinity rewound itself, and she was able to get a closer look at the
intruder. She stared.

A Time Guardian caught in the headlights. ^_^

XD

over in the void between and beyond time. She could swear that a few of
those cars had been *flying*, and the barrage abated with one

particularly

percussive flash of light, high above her head, which heralded a final,
airborne DeLorean, crackling with electricity, disappearing with a

rather

disconcerting crack that was different from the sound made by the rest.

You described this one well.  It made me instantly think of the BttF2

lightning

strike.

*bows* I was trying for precisely that. Glad it worked.

"What the hell was THAT all about?"

She's a little slow on the uptake now.  Nearly being run over several

dozen

times has the tendancy to do that to one.

I'd think a nigh-infinite number of dimension-crashing DeLoreans would give
ANYONE pause.

Once she did, though, she was not a happy camper.

Let's examine that statement...  What kind of a camper would S.Pluto

actually

be?  Does she like to go out into the wilderness with a tent and a

backpack, or

does she like to bring a lot of tech with her?

The Anime and Manga Plutos might be the sort to try and rough it, even if

it was

just with a knife and the clothes on her back... if she had very good

reason to

do so, of course.

Fanfic Convention Pluto, on the other hand... She likes to bring along the
trailer, the satellite dish, the portable shower, the lawn chair, and lots

of

sunscreen.  And bug spray.  Lots and lots of bug spray.

Heh.

As Pluto, it was her duty to prevent unauthorised temporal transit--in

other

words, she was supposed to keep ignorant people from going back and

forth

through time and mucking things up.

Which is precisely what the idiots with the DeLorean had done,

repeatedly.

It's a Perfectly Proper Impropriety, y'see.  Gotta go around mucking up

the

timeline.  What'd she do otherwise, to break the monotony?  Read a book?

Write

her memoirs?

Take up skateboarding?

And yet, just as she was about to step into the timestream and take

control

of things--by force if necessary--somehow, *somehow* the two idiots

managed

to fix the mess they made of time, and in some places, left it just a

bit

better than they found it.

It's Hollywood!  Gotta fix the timeline once you've broken it.  It's how

you

relieve the tension at the end.

But of course.

"Well, at least they're being somewhat responsible about it," Pluto
muttered, sighing as she watched the car vanish again in another time,

and

the counterpart of its occupant rush up to the counterpart of its

inventor,

setting off another chain of temporal violation.

Time Travel Responsibly.  Remember to bring along your Designated Time

Guardian.

But, since they're being responsible about it, I guess that's a good

reason to

not excessively harm the naive travelers.

The whole mess in 1955 should have been enough to make Doc dismantle the
time machine immediately after it returned to 1985. Some people just don't
learn. Being responsible after you've been irresponsible sort of negates
your responsibility...

...um, I digress, because I lost my train of thought. o.o;;

And Pluto hadn't even had to lift a finger.

"Well, Doc... I destroyed the time machine."

Nitpick...

"Well, Doc...it's destroyed."

That's another nifty thing about some varieties of timelines and Destiny:
they're sometimes very adaptable and tend to correct themselves after a

little

time.

Yup.

She was so busy being relieved that the crisis had been averted that she
didn't notice the flying steam engine until it knocked her ass over
teakettle.

...You know, I hadn't heard that expression before.  Though, I admit,

after some

analysis, it is quite descriptive. ^_^

Heh. It's a fun expression.

A flash of crimson and violet, an explosion, and a mighty crash.

With lots of flaming shrapnel and a huge, cinematic fireball as a

time-traveling

tanker-truck driven by a partially-damaged T-800 crashes into the side of

the

train?!  YEAAH! ^___^

*takes away your DVD carousel*

"It's spinning like crazy, Emmett!" a woman's voice called from inside.

"I

think the crash broke it!"

You know, that's one thing three movies never damaged: the flux capacitor.

The

time circuits got kind of finnicky at times, but overall, fuel and energy

was

more of a problem.

Well, since it was the single most important part of the machine, it only
stands to reason it had the most protection around it. I mean, remember the
end of the third movie, when we saw what was left of the DeLorean? The flux
capacitor itself was just BARELY bent--the glass on the case was shattered,
the box it was in was banged up and bent around the edges, but the capacitor
itself was still mostly intact.

"Your time control circuits aren't broken," Pluto said crisply, drawing

the

man's attention.

He blinked, stepping out of the train onto the mists below, surprised to
find them solid enough to stand on. "Who are you?"

"Your worst nightmare.  A staff-wielding time guardian in a miniskirt."

"NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!"

"Time to pay the piper, Doc Brown."

Heheheheheheheh. XD

"I am the Guardian of Time, the sworn protector of all points between

the

beginning and end of eternity, Sailor Pluto." Here, she levelled his

staff

at him, the Garnet Orb flaring brilliantly crimson. "Order your family

to

gather all possessions and vacate the time vehicle. Now."

What a way to deal with those dangerous time traveler types!

"Step away from the time machine and get down on the ground!!!"

Very... police-ey. ^_^

Heh.

"I'm afraid I don't quite understand what's going on here," the man
sometimes known as "Doc" Brown admitted.

"Let me clarify," Pluto began. "On October 27, 1985, at 1:20 am Pacific

For some strange reason, I imagine her whipping out a pair of black shades

here

and writing them a ticket on a clipboard...

*snrk*

"Your vehicle was stolen, and the thief used it to cause extensive

damage to

history. You and your assistant again took matters into your own hands,
again just as I was about to return to the flow of time to correct

matters

personally. By some miracle, you succeeded in restoring the proper

timeline,

and then..." She trailed off meaningfully.

Wow, she's really thumbing through the file here.

It IS her job, after all...

Ultimately, your assistant was returned home, but you remained in the

past,

and the time vehicle was destroyed.

Though, you have to admit, she sure took long enough to notice.  Doc Brown

was

there for long enough to set up a blacksmith shop and hide the time

machine in

an empty mine and all that.

Fourth-dimensional mechanics. Everything happened a hundred years ago two
seconds from now, and all that.

"Here's my satellite dish I had to unfold to get my Iridium phone to have
high-speed Internet.  And here's Mamoru, wishing Usagi had bugspray."

*falls over laughing*

"No," Pluto replied with a shake of her head. "I simply intend to

destroy

your time vehicle. I will then personally transport you to an era of

your

choosing, where you will remain for the rest of your lives. You," she

said

with a cold look at Doc, "are to refrain from constructing a time

machine

EVER. AGAIN. If I ever catch you building another one, the next time I

won't

be so lenient." The Orb pulsed blood-red at this pronouncement. "Do you
understand me?"

That's a reasonable deal.  Can they construct a time-guardian-zapping

lantern

before they build the next time machine?

They can TRY... XD

"Y-yes...yes, ma'am," Doc said, swallowing nervously.

Pluto nodded. "Now, remove your things from the train, please."

Here... I imagine Pluto aiming her staff like a Howitzer at the train,

motioning

for the others to back away.

Pretty much accurate, yeah.

the time from whence the family came. "I'll also be confiscating THAT,"

she

replied, pointing at the hoverboard.

She's just saying that because she always wanted one when she was a little

girl,

and her stepmom never let her have one.

"But maaaa!"

"No buts, now get back to your poise and mysteriousness lessons!"

*snicker*

She wanted to be a holy-terror HOVERBOARD chick, but noooooooooo, she had

to go

off and become the high-and-mighty Guardian of Time. ^_^

Life sucks sometimes. *nodnod*

Pluto quirked an eyebrow at that, but let it slide. "Is that

everything?" At

the family's nods, Pluto raised her staff again. "Dead Scream."

Pretty standard, all-purpose attack.  Guaranteed to remove stumps,

gophers,

youma, and vaporize errant time machines.

And yet it STILL can't scratch those pesky AOL CDs...

The Browns flinched as a whirling orb of energy smashed into the time
locomotive, obliterating it in a heartbeat. "Now," Pluto said with a

small,

cold smile, "Where can I drop you nice folks?"

Why am I suddenly getting Animaniacs flashbacks with the Warner Brothers

(and

sister) deciding they don't want to be dropped in any particular time
period--they want to stay forever and ever and ever with Auntie Pluto?

KYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! BEGONE EVIL THOUGHT, BEGONE!!

Pluto slipped back through the Gate into the ether of infinity,

satisfied

that once again, she had prevented the destruction of history. Her job

could

be incredibly boring at times, but the periods of excitement more than

made

up for it.

^_^ Ah hah!  I knew it.  Having something to blow up now and again

certainly

breaks the monotony.

Yup. XD

She glanced at the pink Mattel hoverboard tucked under her arm, quirked

a

smile, and had just started to place one booted foot into the pink nylon
strap when...

Hah-hah!  Yeah, she DID want to be a skater.

Heheheheh.

YES!  Keanu's BEST JOB EVER.  Apologies to the Matrix fans, but... nothing

beats

the classic Bill and Ted stuff.  Watched that stuff till the tapes wore

out.

^_^

We are in agreement...about Ted being the only role Keanu was ever suited
for. XD

The Guardian of Time's left eye twitched.

MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAA!!

*evil grin*

Pluto felt her headache returning. "Please explain how two imbeciles

like

you managed to travel to the Gates of Time. Before I throw you back

wherever

you came from."

No, in this circumstance, she has to go with them to talk with the

futuristic

types that sent them.  Neo-Queen Serenity NOTHING!  She's talking with the

ones

whose music becomes the basis of a totally peaceful utopian society!
Excellent! *Guitar noises*

Oh, there will be a reckoning...and a Rufus-beating...

By all means!  But it can't be a simple

throw-'em-back-where-they-came-from sort

of deals.  She has to play detective, trying to figure out where the

problem

is, cramming into that rickety time booth and following them along to make

sure

they don't damage things too badly!

Oh, there'll be plenty of things for Pluto to do if I keep going with
this...there's no end to the number of temporal violations I can draw from.

...but then again, who am I to tell you how to write your stories?  You've

been

around the fanfic scene for probably half a decade or more longer than I

have.

AND you've actually finished some series, which I can't honestly say yet.

I have? o.o;; News to me... O_O;

Nevertheless, I found this quite entertaining and definitely worth

commenting

on!  Thanks for writing it!  It was jolly good fun.

Glad you enjoyed it! Thanks for the comments.

--------------------------------------
The Eternal Lost Lurker
www.lurkerdrome.com



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