Look, shade, the criticism is valid, you had Ranma
follow basically the same
plotline as laid out in LH for how Naru and Kei
meet, that plus this dream
sequence adds to this.

Valid? You apparently haven't even been reading my
fic, you're making so many false claims I'm wondering
just whose fic you are reading at this point.

Also, if you're getting a lot of "you shouldn't kill
Granny hina" advice
from people that know the LH universe, maybe you
should stop behaving like
this and just accept that maybe the people telling
you that might have a
point... and that they're telling you it for a good
reason...and that it's
not "bias" as you put it.

I haven't been getting that, I've been getting poorly
reasoned "You just can't kill Grandma Hina because she
can't die". There's a difference.

But, given the tone use used by you from the
start... maybe you just aren't
able to handle feedback. Thats what it looks like to
me at least.

I can handle feedback just fine, its when people make
false claims about my writing, with NO evidence to
back them up, that I get annoyed.

Mallet happy, meaning that many BAD writers of Akane
tend to write her
whacking Ranma with a mallet repeatedly in a fic,
something that rarely
happens in the manga. 

I repeat, WHERE is this in my fic? So far I see a lot
of bluster but no PROOF.

Who do you think you are? Donald Rumsfield?

I remember Gary Kleppe counted
the number of times she
used a mallet in the Manga and mentioned it at some
point... it turned out
to be a rarity.

http://www.nizkor.org/features/fallacies/red-herring.html

Didn't you read that site yet?

But the point is that you wrote her as the
"sterotypical" Akane that
Anti-Akane folk like to paint her as.

Sterotypical? Do you think she should be jumping with
joy that she's going to be married off? Please, tell
me how a "non-sterotypical" Akane would react to that,
with NO knowledge of what Ranma just found out?

 

Now me, I don't like Akane, I'd rather Ranma ended
up with Ukyou... but
that's my bias, I like Ukyou because she's willing
to let a grudge of a
decade go, that says a ton about the maturity of the
person. It also tells
me that if she and Ranma got married that she'd be
patient enough to put up
with the social damage his father inflicted on him,
and help him become a
more socially balanced person. But hey, that's just
me.

And this has absolutely nothing to do with this fic or
the points you try to make.

Happy to oblige

David gave his honest opinion, one that I concure
on. To be honest, I'd read
your first run through on this fic, and wasn't going
to read it again given
the quaity of it the first time through, until I saw
his post, then I
decided to give it another go to see if it had
improved.

I still concure with him, Akane's actions were not
at all the reactions of
the character that I'm familiar with.

Right.....avoid answering the question.

WHERE is this evil Akane? You aren't giving me proof,
you're giving me unsubstantiated claims that amount to
nothing more then a repeating of what you already
claimed. 

 

Ranma is an emotionally open book, and as david put
it,

...But still, it bugs me every time Akane's
personality
is erased to make it happen.  Would Akane verbally
abuse Ranma
when he's standing there with a letter informing him
that his
grandmother is dead?  I don't think so.  Akane may
be bad-tempered,
and unreasonably suspicious, but in scenes like this
she is being
written as devoid of the capacity for human sympathy
and concern,
a capacity that she has repeatedly demonstrated when
Ranma was
on the skids.
And as I just said, Ranma wears his emotions in
plain sight...and his
emotions would be all over his face from the letter,
she'd see that and
inquire what was wrong not verbally abuse him like
she did.

Akane is not a psychic. Using some deductive reasoning
based on the EVIDENCE available to her she can
interpret his reaction as being to the impending
wedding discussion/preperations taking place.

This was poor writing on your
part, and an example of
you just taking the lazy way out. So instead of
writing her as the character
she is... you write her as something that would
drive ranma away.
LAZINESS!!!

This is poor observation on your part. Instead of
actually taking the time to read my fic you have come
barging in with a whole bunch of unfounded
assumptions.
And when those assumptions were popped, do you bother
to go back and check for your mistakes? No, you insist
on more fallacies.

LAZINESS!!!

The Tendou's and Genma get the mail for him and we
have the scene with all
the money, someone would wonder where it all came
from .

Perhaps, if enough time had passed for the initial
celebration over finding such a large sum of money to
fade a little. The Tendos and Genma aren't any more
noted for their logic then Ranma is. And of course,
last I checked, they were still celebrating their good
fortune....
 

They'd see it was from the Hina estate, and they did
find out about the
death,

Incorrect. The priest was for the Wedding.

 We had the whole scene with the priest

arriving, and then akane
denoucing him and calling him a jerk and an idiot
while he's in emotional
distress... this is all so much bull it's not funny.

Denoucing him? She's arguing with Nabiki and Soun, not
talking to Ranma. There's a difference. At NO POINT in
this did Akane take any direct action/speech against
Ranma.

 

Simply put, Akane would NOT do that, instead she'd
assume that he was in
some sort of distress...and maybe even be supportive
of him... dirrecting
her anger at her father and Genma for trying to
force the marriage.

Welcome to non-fanon Akane. The one who is not a
psychic Saint Mary. 

However, in this fic, she exhibits many of the

"bad"

fan-fic akaneisms that
just aren't found in the manga.

So Akane never assumes something? She doesn't
selectively interpret what she sees? She doesn't
reject being married in space of a single afternoon?

Who are you trying to kid here?

Just pointed one out.

*Bzzzt* Wrong.

You just showed everyone that you don't even read what
you're critiquing.

What you wrote felt like the characters were under
some alien mind control
device making them behave like puppets.

How so? 

Evidence, its not just for WMD hunters anymore.

Ranma Saotome doesn't run away from nothin. Sorry had

to say it since he couldn't.

To quote you, "Where Ranma is all about dodging
comittments".

Ranma runs when it comes to non-martial artist things.
Be it cats, commitment, or awkward moments, he does
indeed run.

Ranma never once ran away from a problem. 

Bullshit.

Read the manga again.

When I say "force him to leave" I mean drive him

away. 

And when I say "Stop saying one thing and meaning
another" I mean "Stop saying one thing and meaning
another".

If by the point in the Manga you're basing this on, 
he hasn't left, the current stuff going on wouldn't 
make him give up and leave.

And when did his grandmother die in the manga at this
point?

http://www.nizkor.org/features/fallacies/begging-the-question.html

Seriously, you REALLY need to read this site before
trying to debate.

character that Ranma has had no ties to before 
otherwise and just plunking the situation down

without

preamble.

Plunking the situation down? I haven't even finished
setting it up yet. 

Maybe because people who know the LH Manga and Anime
know that she's there for a reason, and does play a 
vital role as the shadow of the old manager
against which Kei is being measured. She is the
catalyst for Kei's introduction, the person that
reaffirms the that Naru is the girl, the
person that took care of Kei's adopted sister , and a
fun character all around. 

Consult your dictionary on "Deus Ex Machina" and then
get back to me.

Oh, most impressive, trying to back up poor writing

by >arguing that the reviewer is engaging in faulty
logic.

http://www.nizkor.org/features/fallacies/poisoning-the-well.html

Okay, you've just gone from being a "bad writer" to
being an idiot.

http://www.nizkor.org/features/fallacies/personal-attack.html

Don't you get tired of making fallacies?

Reviews are based on an opinion of the literary merit

of a work, and opinions on such can neither be right 
nor wrong, they only ARE.

And listing only two lines of reasoning for an action
that could have a reason beyond those two is a
fallacy.

My opinion is this... given your bad handling of
Akane,

And your proof of this is?

Inability to see that if a number of people are
telling you "Killing Granny Hina is a bad
idea in a LH fic" is for your own good... 

So far I have heard no good reasons why killing Granny
Hina is a bad idea, only that some people seem to be
locked on this "It MUST go like Canon" that was also a
problem for the Ranma 1/2 writing community.

You've shown that you are not able to handle honest
criticism or take advice.

http://www.nizkor.org/features/fallacies/false-dilemma.html

Again, I have not seen honesty in your words. When you
actually read the fic and give actual criticism and
advice based on the actual fic let me know.

Hmm... why do I feel like I'm writing back to some
middleschooler who engages in "Am too, Am not, Am

too, 

Am not" reasoning. 

Wow, two fallacies in the same sentence.

http://www.nizkor.org/features/fallacies/red-herring.html

http://www.nizkor.org/features/fallacies/personal-attack.html

Believing that just because he repeats something
endlessly that he's making points in an agrument.

I pointed out a simple fact, when did I ever say I
wanted Ranma to be Keitaro?

Look, the staging, the dream, the grope in the bath, 
all of these are basically replays of LH intro, so 
it's pretty obvious the role he's being cast in

The staging is different, the dream is different, the
grope diverges fairly quickly. So again, why do you
keep assuming things despite all evidence to the
contrary?

Ranma can fill different roles IF he is suited for 
them. The roles that Keifilled, he's not suited for. 
Period.

And who are you to say which roles Ranma can or can
not be? You do grasp the concept of Alternate Universe
right?

Ranma, being Ranma would fail in trying to fulfil
Kei's roles because he simply doesn't have the
qualities needed to succeed in them, the same 
way that Boy George would fail in the role of Othello
if he kept up his "Boy George" act.

Again, you miss the point. Who said Ranma is trying
fulfill Keitaro's specific roles? Ranma has different
qualities that can be applied in interaction with the
girls of Love Hina.

As Henny Youngman put it, telling a good joke is all
about 3 things.

And when did Grandma Hina's death become a joke? I
must have missed that...oh wait, just another fallacy.

http://www.nizkor.org/features/fallacies/red-herring.html

big dif between a deus ex machina and a manipulator.

Wrong. Grandma Hina is used as Deus Ex Machina in Love
Hina. Look up the definition. Then read the manga.

Not really interested at this point...
after giving constructing criticism and getting this
sort of  response back

Here's a hint, try actually READING the work you're
critiquing first. It works much better that way.

-Shade





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