On Fri, 17 Oct 2003, ucchans wrote:

This is the last of the pretty-much-completed chapters. 7 is still
undergoing some draft work, and I'll post it tomorrow.

Whoa, whoa.  You're hardly giving us time to respond, sugar.  But I'll try.

	Heheh...my apologies. :)

  The voice, the unfamiliar voice, I did not like it, the voice that
confirmed Belldandy's guess, I did not like it at all it felt wrong GO
AWAY.

Interesting slip into stream-of-consciouness style as 'your' automatic
impulses take over.

	Yep.

  I shook my head. "Okay, warn away. Tell us how Skuld's going to suffer,
how you're going to break us and wear us down and all that crap." I
paused, realizing that my hand was actually starting to twitch a little
bit.

Maybe a little tremor in the voice, too, whether from fear (after all, what
*is* going on in 'your' head?) or purer rage.

	Ooh, good idea. I'll fiddle with that.

  "Why hello there," Mara said, right next to my ear.

  Again with the wrestling with fury and fear and the need to fight.
"Please do not get so close to me, demon," I said, grinding my teeth.

The funny part here is how 'you've' sort of lapsed into a Kunoesque form of
address when speaking to Mara.  And frankly, I'd keep it up.  The fact that
she eventually gets irritated at not being called by name might prove a
useful weapon for needling *her* back.

	Definitely will do so. :)

Of course, she'll just call you 'Mr. Guardian Angel' from now on, but you
can live with that, ne?

	Yup.

  Well, except for her screams as Banpei and Sigel--the two robotic guards
that Skuld had set up to patrol the temple--managed to be a little less
predictable than she'd gauged. It made me feel a little better instead of
worse, though. I sighed with relief.

Hee-hee.  Overconfidence will get you every time.  Unless you're a Yankees
fan, evidently.

	Bah.
	My condolences on Cubs, by the way. They were so robbed.

  I nodded, then grinned. "And Skuld's protectors need support of the
emotional kind too, right?"

  They both blushed, as expected.

Nice exchange, but they are a bit too easy to tease, aren't they?

	Absolutely.

around. But I there's a difference between a warning sense and a primal
urge to kill."

Whoa!  First grammar error of the night!  Either get that 'I' out, or use it
as a sort of ellipsis: "But I... well, there's a difference..."  That sort
of thing.

	Eep, typo. I was fixing that sentence up earlier, must have missed
the extraneous 'I' in there.

I watched as Keiichi handed her some pickled daikon slices, and
fought back the urge to remark on how wonderfully domestic this was. I
think I already hit my quota for teasing them this week.

Oh, yeah.  But just wait till next week.

	Heehee.

  I plopped down on the opposite end of the couch, glanced briefly at the
TV. Nothing particularly interesting.

Interesting reminder to us readers how Urd could get out of her bedroom
without opening the door.

	Heh, that actually wasn't the intent, but cool. :)

  "You think she'd try the potion thing on us?" The idea didn't sit all
that well with me.

  "I guess it's possible. But I like to think that she's learned from her
mistakes."

Actually, my thought is that nothing would piss Keiichi off more than some
guy, even a mensch like yourself making time with his sister.  And Urd
doesn't wanna piss Keiichi off.

	Hrm, that's true. I'll take a look at that.

  And what was a goddess' mother doing giving orders to a demon?

Nice to see that *this* version of you isn't all that familiar with the
whole setup.

	Yup. Andrew still has a lot to learn about what's going on in this
universe.

  Fear of disturbing things that weren't ready to be disturbed warred with
the fear of leaving things to fester that shouldn't fester. The latter
quickly won, especially as it was assisted by curiosity.

Not to mention 'you' genuinely needed her assistance.

	Oop, forgot about that. :)

  "That's because I'm half-demon."

  Silence.

  "I really don't know how to respond to that," I finally said.

Wow.  I gotta admit, that's probably the best course of action to take, and
one I wouldn't have thought of.  Honest, and yet open-minded.

	I've also always wanted to write that line into something. :)

  "You all have any other deep, dark secrets I don't know about?" I said,
trying to lighten the mood. My words fell flat, though, and I didn't think
it really worked.

  "We've all got our secrets."

  Nope, it didn't. I hoped this wouldn't last too long.

Well, scratch what I said about the best course of action.  But then, you
didn't want an avatar that *always* knew the right thing - more or less - to
say, anyway, ne?

	Yeah. Andrew can't be perfect, 'cos I'm hardly perfect. I hope
you're not disappointed by the speed with which this bit of tension is
resolved, though; I couldn't find a way to keep it up without derailing
some things and also making Andrew look like an utter jerk.

Until next time, excelsior!

	Thanks again. :)

Andrew Huang...Shizumaru@KawaiiMUCK
http://www.hcs.harvard.edu/~alhuang/
NAC MAC FEEGLE!

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