> >About the hotaru abortion debate... it's damn simple. She's sick of

everything in her life being about death. I'm sure point that out in the
previous chapters.

Well, obviously that didn't come across to me as you intended.  That IS
quite a good starting point, however (and one that doesn't preclude the
Usual
Outer Suspects from taking another point of view).

The fact that they basically made total morons of themselves and ALMOSt
burnt all their bridges with Haruka's ignorant little rant does.

Oh, and about abortion in Japan... there is guilt about it. I don't want

to

go into detail, but there are religious issues about the soul not being

at

rest.

I'm quite aware of that.  Assuaging guilt over abortion is the main root

of

all those little "buddlet" (to use the term my brother, sister, and I
adopted) statues
decorating the entrance pathways into many temples.  It's not uncommon
for the parents to return every year to place an offering in front of
the statuette,
I'm told.  (I noticed rather a LOT of these statuettes, though.)

However, the common presence of after-the-fact guilt hardly changes my
main point.  Hotaru's school peers would be expecting her to get an
abortion,
and Hotaru knows this.  (In fact, most would probably view it as an almost
automatic decision.)  She decides to do otherwise.  Why?  What led to
this decision?  Show us, don't tell.

She beats herself up the herself up with indecision for the first few
chapters of the story.

I think the best way for me, as one individual reader, to swallow Hotaru's
decision might in fact be to have her defend it, repeatedly, using your
point
above (" 'Can't I for once have my purpose be about life rather than

death?'

Hotaru pleaded tearfully") to Haruka and Michiru, who hard-headedly take a
"why don't you be reasonable about this!?  You're sacrificing college!
Sacrifices have to be made for the greater good!" standpoint.  While I

don't

usually recommend characterization by conflict, in this case it might be
a good
strategy.

I might have her mention that to some other people, but Haruka and Michiru
are already tredding on thin ice... Michiru'll probelly ring Haruka's neck
if she ever THINKS about brining it up "soon".

Haruka seems almost hell bent in destroying their relationship with hotaru.

btw, if this isn't helping, i'm happy to drop the point.  The ONLY point
of C&C
is to help an author and a story become better.

Please do. It's stuff I already know. You are correct that I should really
make it more clear, but what you've been telling me is I already know.

Thanks though, C&C is ALWAYS welcome.

Oh, and to get another related issue out of the way. Something people have
been bitching about from point one is Ranma smokes.

It is not meant to be something Ranma would do. It's ment to show exactly
how far the stress level has pushed him. It's a sign of how far the mighty
have fallen thanks to stress.

-Sama



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