Now that the final prereader got back to me, I can post this at last


Prologue

Pantyhose Tarou took a moment to straighten his tie and adjust the bouquet
of flowers cradled in his arm one last time before reaching forward and
ringing the doorbell.

Things were going perfectly. He didn't need a mirror to know he cut quite
the dashing figure. The tuxedo he had 'requisitioned' in the wee hours of
the morning from a tailor's shop fit his slender, well-muscled frame
perfectly. His hair was newly cut, still low in the back but with the bangs
removed from the front. And to complete his ensemble, he wore his best
pantyhose tied around his forehead. It was the hot pink one. Girls loved hot
pink. All of that, in addition to his naturally handsome features, charming
personality, and unrelenting charisma, made him irresistible to members of
the opposite gender.

Tarou snickered quietly to himself until the door opened and revealed the
figure behind it. It took Tarou a moment to recognize the man with the
mustache as being the Tendou girls' father. Shun? Spoon? It was something
that started with an 'S', not that it really mattered.

Tarou smiled and said, "I'm here to pick up Kachi for our date. Why don't
you go inside and grab her for me? Be quick, and I'll give you a tip." He
thought the last bit was a nice touch. Who said Pantyhose Tarou didn't exude
class?

Soun's eyes bulged until they nearly fell out of his head. He roared,
"You're here to date my Kachi?!"

Casually, Tarou said, "Yeah. I mean, I didn't call ahead or anything. I
thought I'd surprise her. Chicks dig surprises. Now you run along and tell
her that her Romeo is waiting."

Rather than retreating inside, Soun emerged from the house and took a
menacing step forward. "See here, you. I won't let you have anything to do
with my wife."

Tarou began to draw back in surprise for a moment before recovering. His
stance became one of defiance as he stood his ground and snickered. "Okay,
you old coot, you almost had me going there. I like to think that I know
Kachi well enough to say unequivocally that she would never marry some
creepy geriatric like you. Aside from you being old enough to be her father,
you could never come close to satisfying a hot chick like her. I can tell
she's one of them really passionate types that can't get enough of
snuggling, and other more naughty stuff that I'm not comfortable discussing
with an old fossil like you. Heck, I bet she's so energetic, she'll make me
have to put out some effort. Not that I can't keep up with her. I'm more
than man enough for that." He cleared his throat before the fantasy became
too entrenched. "Anyhow, an old guy like you would end up having a heart
attack inside a month. What she needs is some hot stud, like yours truly, to
satisfy her needs."

Talking about Kachiko really made Tarou excited, at least as much as when he
got into a fight. It was another sign of the True Love he had for Kachiko.
To Soun, he warned, "Now that we're clear on everything, why don't you move
that ancient backside of yours, so I can go see my woman, before I have to
move it for you?"

Soun's face took on a reddish hue as he began trembling uncontrollably.
"Why... you... little...."

Tarou shook his head sadly. There was nothing more pathetic than an ancient
fart that thought he still had 'the stuff'. "Fine, old man. We'll do it the
hard way." Tarou cracked his knuckles ominously and moved forward.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

The pepper shaker slipped from Kasumi's grasp as she felt a chill run down
her spine, one caused by the loud roar of terror inducing rage that filled
the air. She abandoned her meal preparations and hurriedly ran out of the
kitchen to where she had felt the origin of the disturbance.

Outside, her father stood above Pantyhose Tarou's prone form, shaking it
back and forth like an unwanted rag doll. Tarou didn't respond to the action
in the slightest; he just lay limply in Soun's grasp, staring off into space
with a look of wide-eyed horror and a rictus smile painted on his face.

"Oh my." Kasumi was a touch worried. Ordinarily, she couldn't feel the fear
generated by her father's demon head attack,. It had something to do with
growing up around it, as well as her naturally placid nature rendering her
largely immune. However, this time not only had she felt the technique in
use, but it had been at a great distance as well. Truly her father must have
been distraught to produce such a tremendous amount of power in his attack.

The other residents emerged hurriedly from of the house as well. Like
Kasumi, they too had been drawn by the aura of terror Soun had generated.
They stood by mutely and watched the scene unfold.

Kachiko was the first to understand what had happened and reacted. "Yeah,
that's it, you old coot! Make yourself useful for a change and kick the crap
out of that conceited, obnoxious jerk!"

For a moment, Soun stopped his throttling. He couldn't believe his ears. His
wife was cheering for him. More enthusiastically than ever, he started
working over Tarou's limp form, kicking and punching with all his might. He
would have kept doing it until he couldn't swing his arms any longer, but
Ranma and Genma dragged him off before he caused any permanent damage.

Kachiko continued whooping it up. "Sweet. Just for that, I'll treat you to
some of my famous curry bread, once I dump bull butt in the trash," she told
Soun in delight.

"I always loved your curry bread," Soun said. He broke free of the Saotomes'
hold and grabbed Tarou's limp form, hurling it over his shoulder like a sack
of rice. "Let me take care of him, and you can start baking."

"Done deal." Kachiko went back inside, humming pleasantly to herself.

Kasumi clapped her hands in delight. "How wonderful. Mother was actually
cheering for Father. I'll have to start inviting Mr. Pantyhose over for
meals."

"Oh, I'm sure he'll be more than happy to accept that," Nabiki said dryly as
yet another day at the Tendou household got underway.

Xxxxxxxx

The Things We Wish For...
Chapter 10

Any and all C+C is appreciated. You can contact me at
sommer@3rdm.net

All of my fics are stored at the following:

Larry F's new address at:
http://www.rakhal.com/florestica/d_b_sommer/index.html

Or R+C books at:
http://dbsommer.rcbooks.org

And also Angcobra is now storing all of my fics, at
http://dbsommer.web1000.com/dbsommer.html

Standard Disclaimer: I don't own the rights to any of the Ranma 1/2
characters. They belong to Takahashi and whomever she sold the rights to.

Preface: What's happened before: Akane got her hands on a wish and used it
to wish her mother had never been in a car accident and was alive in the
present. Well, her mother wasn't in an accident, and is with them in the
present. There's only a slight complication; Kachiko had been in two
accidents, the first occurring when she was the ripe old age of seventeen...

And on to the fic.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

"Two cards. And no dealing from the bottom of the deck."

"Come on, would I do that to you?"

"Yes."

"Ha! That's what you think. I'll have you know I believe card games are one
of the few things in this world that is sacrosanct. I'd never screw around
by cheating at a card game. Nor would I let anyone else screw around either,
if you get my meaning."

"In that case, read em and weep. Full house."

"!#$%^. I was sure you were bluffing. Another hand!"

"Okay. It's your money."

"Actually, it's your money. You're only just now starting to win some of it
back."

Ranma entered the room and nearly facefaulted into the floor at the sight of
Kachiko and Nabiki calmly sitting at a table and playing poker with one
another. Well, Kachiko seemed slightly irritated as she took swig from the
bottle of beer next to her, but was quickly regaining her composure. Both
had anted up already, and were in the process of considering their hands.

Daring to tread in the unknown waters, Ranma asked, "So, what's going on?"

Kachiko's eyes remained fixed to her cards, an unreadable expression on her
face. "We decided to be more open about trying to one up the other, so we're
playing games of poker to see who's the best. I'm winning." There was a
touch of pride in her voice.

Nabiki's eyebrow arced in mild reproach. "No. You had a hot streak. Now I'm
on one. I'll be getting back my money, and some of yours, shortly."

"We'll see." Kachiko tossed a few chips in. Nabiki answered with the same.

"I'm good at poker," Ranma boasted.

"Then why don't you join us?" Nabiki offered with the look of a spider
decked out in its best outfit inviting the fly into its web to drop by for
'just a bite.'

"Forget it," Kachiko answered. "With his poker face, you might as well just
reach into his pocket, take the wallet, and grab the money. It's no fun just
taking it. The enjoyment comes in outwitting a savvy opponent. Then you know
the satisfaction of earning your winnings."

"But I'm good at poker," Ranma insisted.

"Ha!" Kachiko threw down three cards. "You're exactly like this guy I knew
back in my old school. He thought he was the man when it came to poker and
just had to challenge me to prove who was better. It was pathetic. I beat
him four hundred consecutive times. After the last hand, his mind snapped
like a dry twig. The next day he came to school dressed up like one of the
guys on the cards, proclaimed himself 'The Gambler King', and stated that he
would show us all by making his fortune by gambling." Kachiko laughed hard.
"I'm telling you, he was so crappy at cards, he couldn't beat a five year
old with a loaded deck."

Nabiki's smile was nearly ear to ear as she stared at the crimson faced
Ranma. "Oh, I'm fairly certain he was good enough to manage that."

A sullen Ranma grumbled, "I'm going out," and left without another word.

"Touched a nerve, did I?" Kachiko asked.

"Let's just say, Ranma's had problems with gambling in the past, and I'll
take two."

Sagely, Kachiko said, "Can't be good at everything. Best to be great at one
or two things and bad at others instead of just being average with
everything. Take me for instance, I'm great at cards, martial arts, making
friends, being highly observant of my surroundings."

"Being modest," Nabiki slipped in.

"Yeah, that too, though Sakura always slapped me in the back of the head
when I said it. She was good at slapping me. Not that I deserved it, at
least, most of the time. Not that many people agreed with me when I said
that, either." Changing the subject, Kachiko said, "Why don't I bet fifty
chips?" and slid the appropriate amount to the middle of the table.

Nabiki looked at the huge stack of chips in the center of the table and
closely examined the time lost girl's features for any hint of what she
held. There was a cocky grin there, but thirty hands had taught Nabiki that
she always held that grin, even if she hadn't managed to snag something as
crappy as a pair of twos.

After a minute's indecision, and based on the fact she only had two pairs,
Nabiki tossed her cards down. "Fold. What did you have?"

Kachiko threw down her cards. "Flush. Told you my worm had turned."

"Again," Nabiki insisted, passing on making a snide remark at the poor
application of the saying. She was certain her luck hadn't left her and it
was a one hand aberration. She still needed to get her money back and at
least break even.

One thing Nabiki admitted to herself was that playing cards with her
mother... Kachiko, rather, was that it was proving itself to be unexpectedly
fun. Actually, she was finding Kachiko much more tolerable after the
incident with the hourglass. That the girl had been willing to risk so much
for a nominal enemy, or at least antagonist, spoke volumes for her when 'the
chips were down' (Nabiki prided herself on knowing how to turn an
appropriate phrase). Good volumes, since Kachiko was normally quite loud as
a rule, and not always in the nicest of ways.

Though once Nabiki thought about it, a lot of her antagonism was from the
rest of the families (except Ranma) trying to make her conform to something
she simply wasn't. Every time they tried, Kachiko rebelled in the worst way
possible. It was easy to see where Akane might have gotten her stubborn
streak from. Nabiki found herself wondering if her grandparents really had
been that old fashioned and determined to make their only daughter into a
'traditional' girl, as Kachiko claimed. The few times Nabiki had asked her
father about the matter, he confessed to only knowing his in-laws in a very
superficial manner. His mother-in-law died two years after he and Kachiko
were married, and her husband died within the year afterwards.

Still, the way Kachiko had described her upbringing, it was probably a
miracle she hadn't bolted on her own. Or perhaps she would have, save that a
bad leg prevented one from running very far.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxx

The doorbell rang while Kachiko was in the middle of dealing a new hand.
Eagerly she hopped to her feet and said, "Maybe it's Mr. Panties coming by
for seconds." She called out, "Soun-chan, get ready to scare the piss out of
Bull-butt again!" and ran down the hall to the door.

Kachiko threw the door open and shouted out an enthusiastic, "Hi there!"

Standing on the porch was an adult Miss Hinako, wearing a tight, clingy
dress that accentuated her every womanly curve, and whose low cut drew eyes
to her impressive chest. She had a great deal of make up on, far more than
she ever wore at school, that only enhanced her natural beauty. The necklace
and earrings she wore glistened under the rays of the sun in the way only
expensive jewelry could. The vision was one that would have left virtually
any man gaping in lust.

"Hello, Mrs. Tendou, I'm here to see Soun-chan," she said pleasantly.

Kachiko's enthusiasm died. "Oh, it's you."

"Yes, I'm here fo-"

Kachiko closed the door in Hinako's face.

"Who was it?" Nabiki called out.

"Garbage-" Kachiko was interrupted by a blast of chi energy that plowed
through the door and hit her squarely in the torso. It drove her through the
next wall and into the room beyond.

Soun, who had already headed toward the door, as per his wife's request,
hurried even more quickly at the sounds of destruction. He saw the
splintered remains of the door and immediately tensed for a fight.

Upon looking through the huge hole in the door, he saw chibi-Hinako standing
there, hands still up and making a circle. "Oh, hello there. You're Akane's
little friend, right?"

"Little?" the girl said in surprise, then looked down at herself.

Soun opened the door, which then fell off its hinges and struck the ground,
leaving him with only a broken handle in his hand. Accepting yet more damage
to his home, he brushed off the destruction and walked up to the girl. He
took a fatherly tone. "My, that dress is a bit big for you, isn't it? And
perhaps you shouldn't wear so much make-up. You should wait until you're a
little older."

Tears welled in the girl's eyes. She burst out crying, then ran away.

Soun was at a loss. None of his girls had reacted quite so badly when they
entered their phases of trying to dress older than they were. He was so
distracted by the tearful reaction that he failed to notice the hole in the
wall behind him. He simply walked deeper into the house, playing out the
scene in his mind and wondering where he might have gone wrong.

Soun was long gone by the time Kachiko revived enough to mumble,
"Size-changing bitch. I'll show her where she can stick her !#$% coins."

It was as Kachiko was starting to groggily remove chunks of the plaster that
had fallen on her that Nodoka walked past the hole and noticed the cursing
figure. She turned her nose up disdainfully at the sight of the time lost
girl lying among the remains of the wall. "How typical. Swearing like a
sailor and destroying the house. Why, if you were my child, I'd turn you
over my knee and spank you myself."

That roused Kachiko's senses, as well as her ire. She hopped up, sending a
cloud of dust around her, and confronted Nodoka. She wagged an accusatory
finger in the woman's direction. "Oh yeah? Well I sure as hell couldn't say
the same thing about you. My lap ain't big enough to hold hips that wide,
and with an ass as fat as yours I doubt you'd even feel someone paddling
your bottom."

Nodoka turned a shade of crimson and a number of disused facial tics made an
abrupt reappearance. "Enough! I will brook your insults no longer! I
challenge you to a duel!"

Kachiko recoiled slightly. "Hey, I was only joking about spanking you. I
don't like spanking. Or women. And even if I did, I wouldn't want to spank
old, saggy women whose bottoms would jiggle like gelatin. "

"Dojo! Now!" Nodoka stormed off, each step thundering throughout the house.

Nabiki watched Nodoka walk past. She didn't bother asking anything. She
simply rearranged the cards and began playing solitaire.

Genma was lying on his back, relaxing, when his wife stomped into their
temporary bedroom. She went to the closet where they kept their belongings.

He said, "Hello, Dear. What seems to be the matter?"

She glared at him as she pulled a wrapped bundle from the closet.

"Ah, I see. It doesn't concern me." Genma rolled over and decided to force
himself to go to sleep. No good would come from being awake for whatever it
was that was about to happen.

Upon arriving at the dojo, the matriarch of the Saotome family found Kachiko
already waiting. The time lost girl's battle preparations seemed to consist
of a nearly empty bottle of beer in her hand and idly leaning against a
wall.

Kachiko smirked. "Come on, I can tell by the way you move you don't know how
to fight. Why don't we call things off and bake some cookies?"

The condescending smile was more than Nodoka could bear. She unwrapped the
bundle she had brought with her, revealing her family katana. She then
tucked the scabbard into the waistband of her kimono.

"Aw, this isn't going to work. I can't hit you. Ranma would never forgive
me," Kachiko complained.

"I assure you, this fight will be over long before that happens."

Kachiko had a pained expression. She placed the now empty bottle down on the
floor. "This sucks. You really got to learn to get a sense of humor. You
don't see me getting all bitchy if someone calls my ass fat."

"That's because you don't have an ass, which only makes sense since it
counterbalances your lack of a top."

The sound of grinding teeth mixed with a guttural growl reached Nodoka's
ears. She shifted into a combat stance in answer to the one Kachiko suddenly
took.

Nodoka's grip tightened on her weapon. "I shall end this in one blow.
Lighting Fast Quick Draw!" she shouted, pulling the weapon from its sheath
in a move so fast it was little more than a metallic blur.

Even Kachiko was taken aback by the blinding speed Nodoka demonstrated. Then
she became taken aback at how the blur promptly flew up into the ceiling,
only to have its momentum stopped as it buried itself in the main crossbeam
in the roof of the dojo directly above Kachiko's head.

Nodoka chewed on her thumbnail as she stared at her family heirloom embedded
in the ceiling. "Oh dear. How did that happen? It looked so simple on
television."

It was more than Kachiko could bear. She fell to the floor and began rolling
back and forth, laughing maniacally. "That's too good. You can't even hold
on to your sword. You're more dangerous to yourself than to your opponent."
Tears rolled down Kachiko's face.

Her laughter was so uproarious that she failed to hear a groan come from
above her head. The crossbeam, a veteran of over a two dozen full scale
battles within the confines of the dojo, and one of the few original pieces
of the building dating before the Ranma Saotome Era, finally gave in to the
most recent damage inflicted upon it. The end the sword had been embedded in
had mostly been severed by the sharp blade. The other end, connected by mere
splinters from previous fights, could not support the sudden shift of weight
and cracked completely through. The same thing happened to the other side,
breaking the end the sword was in.

Kachiko had just a moment to see the timber plunging toward her before it
connected fully with her skull.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxx

"Come on, Mom, you have to tell me how you did it!"

"Sorry, Ranma, some techniques are so dangerous they must remain secret
until you are old enough, and responsible enough, to handle them."

"Quit it with the 'wizened --and I do mean wizened-- mentor' act! You just
got lucky, that's all! Don't even try pretending you meant to do that!"

Nodoka waved dismissively at Kachiko whose constant complaints could not
disturb the aura of satisfaction that surrounded the Saotome matriarch. "The
folly of youth. You do not accept what is plainly obvious."

The aura was only adding to Kachiko's irritation like salt rubbed into an
open wound. "Fine! Give me a rematch."

"No." Nodoka said firmly. "I have proven my point." She rose from the
kitchen table and prepared to leave.

Kachiko leaped for Nodoka's feet, grabbing only the hem of the kimono. Prone
on the ground, she began chanting, "Rematch, rematch!"

"Away, little girl." Nodoka tried pulling her outfit away from the clinging
martial artist.

Suddenly, another figure jumped upon Kachiko and began tugging at her own
skirt. "I want a rematch, too," Ranma stated.

Distracted, Kachiko released her hold on Nodoka. "No way!"

"Yeah, come on. If Mom can take you, I know I can."

"She got lucky!"

"And so did you!"

"Only if you equate luck with intelligence."

"If I do, will you give me a rematch?"

"No!"

Nodoka left the room, humming happily to herself. It was a good day for a
change, perhaps the first since her arrival at Kasumi's insistence. She
would have to share her good cheer with her husband. Kachiko's perpetual
resistance at any womanly duties, and reflexive digs at Nodoka's age, had
soured her mood so greatly that she and her husband had not been acting like
a married couple, despite finally being together and alone. Now Nodoka was
in the mood for Genma to live up to his husbandly duties. At least those
that did not involve giving her time to herself by going out and drinking
with Soun.

Xxxxxxxx

Kasumi stared in consternation at the scene. It was terrible. Her plan had
called for Auntie Saotome to help Kachiko awaken her, admittedly very
buried, mother persona. Instead, not only was Kachiko failing to act more
motherly, but now Auntie was behaving more like a rambunctious teenager as
well. And worse, it was obvious the older woman was delighted about her
actions.

Distraught and out of sorts in a way she had not felt for some time, Kasumi
decided to settle her mind by going out to do some shopping. Something had
to be done to make Kachiko motherly once again. Otherwise things would never
return to normal and she could never pick up where she left off with her
mother.

It took her only a moment to grab the shopping list, her purse, and leave
the house.

Xxxxxxxxxxxx

Nodoka was in an even more delighted mood than before as she made her way to
the bath, bucket of toiletries in hand. Genma had been more than happy to
share in her good cheer, much to her delight. It had been rare they could
indulge in an hour alone, and so actively. Now she was almost as giddy as
Kachiko normally was.

And then something odd occurred to Nodoka. She was giddy and still feeling
quite frisky, almost to the point where she wanted to turn around and return
to the comfort of her husband. Neither of these were states she was normally
in, nor had experienced for some time. Not for years, to be certain.

When she had first been married, she had been like that all the time.
Eventually, things settled down and gone to what she regarded as normal.
Even when Genma returned from his decade long journey with Ranma, it hadn't
exactly been one joyous moment after another. To put it bluntly, her life
had returned to the way it had been right before her husband and Ranma had
left, which was what Nodoka would have claimed was 'normal'. And normal was
not what Nodoka had been feeling over the last couple of hours. It was
something infinitely better and more enjoyable.

"I am not frumpy, and I enjoy life," Nodoka said to herself. But there was a
nagging sensation at the back of her mind, a whispering voice that sounded
far too much like Kachiko, that suggested there might have been at least a
grain of truth in what the younger girl had said. Maybe, just maybe it
wouldn't hurt to loosen up just a bit. Not to the degree of Kachiko's
outrageous behavior, but perhaps there wasn't a need to be so perpetually
formal either.

Nodoka tightened her robe. Listening to that insistent voice and considering
what it suggested could wait. There were more important matters to take care
of first. It wouldn't do to smell the way she did now. It would be most
scandalous. What happened in a bedroom remained in a bedroom; there was no
need to broadcast to the world what Nodoka had been up to. That meant
cleaning up.

Just as Nodoka arrived at the door to the bath, she heard an unusual sound
from within that made her come to a halt. It was unmistakably a grunt, one
too high pitched to be coming from a man.

Her actions over the last hour coloring her perceptions, Nodoka silently
prayed, "Please let it not be my son fornicating with that girl again."

A louder sound of a hard impact reached Nodoka's ears; a sound that could
not possibly have originated with what she had been thinking. Concerned that
something was amiss, Nodoka ignored the 'Occupied' sign and hurried into the
bath. Before her was a naked Kachiko, bent over with her forehead leaning
against the porcelain sink. Her knuckles were white with the deathgrip she
had on the side of the basin. Heavy, rapid gasps escaped from her, as though
she had just completed a marathon at a sprint. Her face was ashen and a wild
look was in her eyes. A towel had pooled around her ankles, and the wetness
that still clung to her body made it obvious she had just used the furo.
There was a red mark at the center of her forehead, and several chips of
porcelain lay at her feet next to the towel.

"Are you all right?" All of the former taunting had left Nodoka's voice.
What remained was genuine concern.

"I'm fine," Kachiko said, starting to catch her breath.

"What happened?"

"Nothing."

"It does not look like 'nothing' to me."

Kachiko's recovery seemed to be at an incredible pace. She sounded almost
normal as she said bitterly, "Perhaps if some incredibly skilled swordswoman
hadn't dropped half the dojo on my head, I would be feeling better."
Indignant now, and, aside from the red mark on her forehead, in normal
spirits, Kachiko wrapped the towel under her arms and exited the bath in a
huff.

Nodoka shook her head. Apparently whatever it was hadn't dampened any of
Kachiko's vigor. She had probably tripped and slammed her head against the
sink. That made sense. Yes, that was probably what had happened. Not
surprisingly, there was little damage done due to the thickness of the
vexing girl's skull. It was probably bulletproof as well. Still, there was
one thing that troubled Nodoka.

When she had first entered, for just a brief second, she could have sworn
Kachiko was slightly transparent.

"I do hate it when I start seeing things." Nodoka removed her robe and
prepared to rinse herself off.

xxxxxxxxxxxxx

Kasumi Tendou walked about the shopping district in what could only be
described as a depression. It simply wasn't fair. Her mother was back with
her, her fondest dream come true. All should have been right with the world,
and Kasumi should have been happier than she had ever been in her life. Her
whole family should have been delighted, and as perfect as it was when she
had been little.

Only it wasn't that way. It was nothing like that at all. Kachiko refused to
act like the sweet, wonderful, perfect woman who had raised Kasumi and her
sisters and been a wife for her husband. Instead, her behavior was almost
like that of a complete stranger. But that was the difference, one that made

things so much worse. The 'almost'. There were still things Kachiko did,
little habits, quaint sayings, her physical appearance, humor that no one
but her seemed to think was amusing, that reminded Kasumi exactly of the
woman who had given birth to her. Kachiko was just enough like her in those
treasured memories that made Kasumi know this girl was her mother, and that
a prod in the right direction would have her acting like normal in no time.
It just had to be the right kind of prod. Normal ones seemed to produce the
opposite of their intended effect. So a special one that would solve
everything all at once would be the best. It was just a matter of finding
the right one. It was up to Kasumi to act upon that knowledge, something she
did not like doing, but was good at when she did it.

Kasumi was still pondering her dilemma when a quartet of teenage girls
rushed past, nearly knocking her over. Unmindful of the near collision, they
continued their breakneck pace and did succeed in knocking over a man, one
at least in his sixties, and from all appearances, very frail.

With a surprising spring in his step, he shot back to his feet and shook his
fist in the direction of the girls. "You little punks should watch where
you're going!"

One of the girls paused long enough to give an obscene gesture before
hurrying along again.

"You little brat! You're lucky I don't give you the beating you deserve!" he
shouted.

Kasumi went over to the man and asked, "Are you all right? Do you need any
help?"

The man looked at her suspiciously, as though he expected her to behave in
the same way as the teenagers that had bowled him over. He examined Kasumi
closely, squinting a bit, before giving a slight nod of approval. "I'm fine.
It was those lousy kids. They don't care about anything. None of them do
nowadays, but especially the girls."

Kasumi nodded her head. She had noticed the same thing.

Seeing he had her attention, the man continued. "In my day, girls would
never run around in skimpy little skirts knocking people down. They knew
their place. They tried to find good husbands, learned how to run a house,
and have children. Now all they want to do is dress like prostitutes, sleep
around, and try to get educated so they can get jobs. Emancipation, bah!
They have their priorities complete screwed up. Whatever happened to
traditional values? Girls just don't have them nowadays"

Kasumi sighed. "It sounds like my mother."

"Your mother?" the man asked. "What do you mean? Surely a traditional girl
like you has a proper mother."

Kasumi nodded. "I did, but lately she's been acting, well, like a rowdy
teenager. She's been drinking heavily, getting into fights, refusing to cook
or clean. She's even been going after younger men and ignoring the man she's
married to."

The old man nodded in understanding. "Menopause. They do that sometimes when
it hits. They think they can recapture a lost youth, but all they really do
is forget what's important."

"That's exactly it," Kasumi said. "Except the menopause. I'm fairly certain
that's not the cause of her behavior."

"Well, whatever it is, she's not acting like a mother should, right?"

Kasumi nodded readily "Absolutely. It's almost like she's completely
changed."

The old man looked Kasumi over for a second. "I can tell you're a very
proper girl that's only trying to help. I'll tell you what I'll do. I might
be able to help you get your mother back on the right track again and acting
like a proper woman should."

Kasumi nearly wept in joy. "Oh, can you?"

"I think so. Follow me."

Kasumi did so eagerly, trying to keep from hoping too much that the solution
to all her mother's problems lay with this elderly gentleman.

xxxxxxxxxxxxx

The journey to the man's home was brief. He only lived two streets away. He
owned a small apartment above a grocer's. It was a quaint, tidy place that
had a very homey and traditional feel to it.

The moment they entered, the man began reminiscing about the past. "My
beloved wife, god rest her soul, went through a similar phase when she was
older. She started rambling about getting a job since she was bored with
keeping house and we didn't have any children to take care of. I tried being
reasonable and telling her no, but then she started getting mouthy with me.
She even threatened to leave, claiming I was a Neanderthal with archaic
values that no one in the modern day lived by, including herself. But I got
my hands on an item that helped her recover her senses. Soon she was back to
happily minding the home and letting me take care of her, the way it should
be." He sighed, cast adrift on the memories.

"How did you do it?" Kasumi asked eagerly.

"Ah, that was the tricky part." The man went to a storage closet next to the
kitchen and brought out a broom. It appeared quite ordinary. It was light
green in color and held plastic bristles rather than the straw type Kasumi
preferred. He held up the item as though it was the most made of gold and
embedded with jewels. "I helped her with this."

"A broom?"

"It's no ordinary broom. This is the 'Stepford Peace at Home' special model
broom. Made in Stepford, Connecticut, in the United States. Probably the
only good thing to come from that country of worthless gaijin," he grumbled.
"Anyway, it has special properties that awaken the proper instincts in women
and they accept their role in society. You give your mother this, and she'll
come to her senses and see the proper way of things in no time."

"Oh my," Kasumi said in awe. And it looked so ordinary. She had no idea
something so mundane could be so powerful.

The old man seemed satisfied by her reaction. "Now here's how it works. You
have to let her use it for a whole day, otherwise its effects wear off.
Luckily, after holding it for a few minutes, she'll want to keep it with
her, so that shouldn't be a problem. Just make sure she's not separated from
it."

"Right," Kasumi said firmly.

"You don't have to worry about guys handling it, it only works on women, so

you don't have to keep it out of your father's reach. Now, I'll wrap it up
for you so you can give it as a gift. It has to be flesh-to-flesh contact
with the broom handle, so don't you go grabbing it. If you do you'll want to
keep it for yourself, and I can tell you don't need any help."

Kasumi bowed deeply. "Thank you for all your help, kind Sir."

"You're more than welcome. Oh, if only all girls today were as dutiful as
you, our country would once again be on the road to true greatness instead
of the ineffectual joke we are now," he sobbed.

Patting his shoulder, Kasumi comforted the old man. She couldn't wait to see
if the broom would work they way he claimed. She prayed it would. It might
be her mother's only hope for a successful recovery from whatever it was
that ailed her.

xxxxxxxx

Kasumi could barely rein in her excitement as she burst into her house.
"Mother, I'm home!"

A voice drifted back, "I'm in the kitchen."

Being mindful not to damage the key to salvation, Kasumi carefully made her
way to the kitchen. Upon arriving, she saw her mother hard at work over the
stove. "Mother, you're cooking," she said in surprise.

Surly, Kachiko answered, "You weren't here. I don't trust the old hag to
serve me anything. She might decide to slip in a little poison, since
dropping a house on my head didn't finish me off. Nabiki won't cook. Akane
can't cook. I know better than to expect guys to be able to do more than
boil noodles. So I guess that leaves me." She paid closer attention to one
of the pots. "Just because I don't enjoy cooking doesn't mean I can't do it.
I can cook fine."

"I know you can, Mother," Kasumi encouraged. And to think, soon she'd not
only cook, but enjoy it as well. All she had to do was receive
enlightenment.

"Since I know how much you like gifts, here." Kasumi thrust the present
forward.

The amateur manner in which the item had been wrapped left little doubt to
its identity. Kachiko rolled her eyes. "Gee, I wonder what that could be?"
She held up her hand before Kasumi could form the first syllable. "Sarcasm.
Don't answer it or you're grounded."

Grounding would have been fine with Kasumi if it meant her mother would
return to normal. No sacrifice was too great for her family.

Kachiko gained a pained expression as she stared at the item in her hands.
"You know, when I say, 'I like gifts' it's with the unspoken assumption that
it is a present I would like." Despite her complaints, Kachiko's eyes took
on an eager gleam as she tore off the wrapping paper, sending it all over
the floor. Covering gone, she stared at the broom distastefully. "Shoot. And
here I was hoping this was a misdirection ploy and you secretly had
something neat hidden inside." She looked at Kasumi, who was practically
jumping up and down in anxiousness. "What?"

"Why don't you try sweeping with it, Mother?"

"I'm kind of busy cooking. Why don't you sweep?" She thrust the broom toward
Kasumi.

She backed away as though it was a poisonous snake. "No, you have to be the
one to sweep up your mess."

"I told you, I'm busy." She held it out expectantly to Kasumi again.

"I'll take over the cooking." Kasumi brushed past Kachiko and stationed
herself in front of the stove.

Hesitantly, Kachiko asked, "Do you know how to prepare that? It's a tricky
dish."

"Yes, you taught me it. It took me a while, but I have since mastered it."

"I didn't teach... Oh, never mind. I hate this temporal displacement crap,"
Kachiko grumbled. As she did so, the broom in her hand brushed ever so
gently across the floor. As the bristles came into contact with the floor,
Kachiko stiffened and her eyes goggled, as though she had been shocked. She
looked at the broom in her hands in amazement. She repositioned her hands,
firmly grasping the handle, then swept again, this time intentionally.

"Oooo." Kachiko began sweeping in earnest. Her eyes were all but glowing as
she stared in awe at the way the discarded wrapping paper was forming a
growing pile with each sweeping stroke. "I never realized sweeping could be
so... fun." She picked up her pace.

"Yes, Mother, it is fun," Kasumi said soothingly as the broom worked its
special kind of magic. Kasumi could barely keep from crying.

At last, all was right with the world.

xxxxxxxxxxxx

Nabiki came down from her room, yawning as she headed for the kitchen
looking for something to snack on. Her afternoon nap had done her some good.
And she was not lazy like Genma. Using her nimble mind burned up energy the
way a martial artist's nimble body burned it up, and she occasionally needed
to lay down to recharge it. Though once she considered the matter, it was
usually around this time of the day that Kachiko was curled up on the back
porch, surrounded by empty beer bottles as she snored up a storm. Maybe the
naps were a hereditary thing.

"Hi," Nabiki said as she walked past Kachiko, who was dressed in a kimono as
she swept up a storm.

"Good afternoon," Kachiko said warmly.

Nabiki headed into the kitchen, opened the refrigerator, and grabbed the
first edible food that met her eyes: some leftover sushi from the other
night. She stuck a trio of pieces in her mouth, savoring the cold, clammy
seafood. It was just what she was looking for, though a dash of wasabi would
have added a little kick to help fully wake her up.

She removed the small take out box from the refrigerator, munched on another
piece, then returned to the hall where Kachiko was continuing to sweep. The
time-lost girl was humming away as her arms pumped furiously, trying her
best to clean up a hard to reach spot under a stand.

"So, did you lose a bet?" Nabiki asked as she leaned against a wall and
continued to devour the seafood.

Kachiko momentarily paused in her sweeping. "Whatever do you mean?"

"That outfit and the cleaning." Nabiki pointed to them with a piece of sushi
in hand.

Kachiko looked at herself. "I'm simply wearing something for the house and
doing a little sweeping is all."

"You seem awful happy about it."

"I am."

Nabiki considered that. So something else was responsible for Kachiko's
delighted mood; something that made a duty as abhorrent as cleaning not
affect the time lost girl's mood in the slightest. "Did something to happen
to Mrs. Saotome or Miss Hinako?"

Kachiko appeared aghast. "Goodness, I certainly hope not."

"Why?"

"They're both such nice people, I wouldn't want anything bad to happen to
either of them."

Nabiki nearly choked on the piece of sushi in her mouth.

Concern was evident on Kachiko's features. "Are you all right?" She gently
patted Nabiki once on the back.

Nabiki was amazed, both by the words coming from Kachiko's mouth, as well as
the fact that she had passed up a golden opportunity to slap her hard on the
back using the excuse that it was in effort to dislodge the food.

"Do you need a glass of water?" Kachiko asked once Nabiki got over her
coughing fit.

In the beginning, Nabiki had assumed that Kachiko was wearing the outfit and
cleaning as some sort of gag, but now she began to suspect something far
more sinister. Looking closely in Kachiko's eyes, past the obvious concern,
there was something else. The best way to describe it was almost a sort of
vapidity, as though not all of Kachiko was there, or some unseen puppet
master was pulling her strings and having the girl dance to an unheard tune.
No matter what problems Nabiki might have had with Kachiko in the past,
dullness was not something anyone could accuse Kachiko of being. Seeing the
martial artist behave in such a manner was outright chilling.

Kasumi entered the hallway. She gave a delighted, "There you are, Mother,"
and drew up next to her.

Kachiko was equally pleased. "I was hoping you were finished with the
laundry. I'm almost done with the cleaning in here. What else shall we do?
Wash the windows? Scrub the floors? Shop for groceries?"

Nabiki grabbed Kasumi by the arm. She said to Kachiko, "Pardon me, I need to
have a private talk with my sister," and then proceeded to drag the
protesting Kasumi around the corner and out of sight, as well as hearing
range.

Keeping one eye on the hallway, Nabiki spoke in a low whisper. "I think
something's happened to Kachi."

"Yes, isn't it wonderful?" Kasumi gushed. "She's acting normal."

"No, it isn't and she's not. Something's really wrong here."

Kasumi shook her head. "Don't be silly. She's always been like that. She's
just been having problems showing it until now."

"I wouldn't say so much she's been having problems as much as been a
problem, for us, I mean," Nabiki elaborated. "Although Kachi has been
getting better lately."

"You shouldn't call Mother by her first name, it's most improper," Kasumi
said.

"That's not what the problem is here," Nabiki said.

"There is no problem, Nabiki. Stop acting like there is. I insist you drop
this matter and let things be. Mother is obviously happy acting normal, like
she used to, instead of acting like, well, an unruly, immature child since
she got back."

Nabiki gave her sister an incredulous look. "Sis, you do understand that the
only reason she was acting that way was because she IS an immature teenager,
right?"

"She is not. She is our mother. Stop this silly argument right now, Nabiki."

Nabiki was about to protest further when she noticed Kasumi's jaw was very
firm and her stance was almost aggressive, something as alien to Kasumi as
Kachiko's vacuousness was to her. Worse, there was something familiar about
the look as well. It took Nabiki a moment to realize it closely mirrored
when Kachiko put her own foot down regarding matters. She hadn't recognized
the resemblance between parent and offspring, mostly because her older
sister had never taken on such a stance, at least not in Nabiki's memory.

Nabiki decided to drop the matter, at least when it came to discussing it
with Kasumi. It was painfully obvious she approved of whatever had happened
to Kachiko. And one couldn't argue with Kasumi. Nobody could. It was like
kicking kittens and puppies around.

"Let's go see how Mom's doing," Nabiki said.

As she hoped, Kasumi returned to her normally placid state and agreed. The
two returned to the hall.

Kachiko's head was cocked quizzically. "Is everything all right? It sounded
like you two were arguing. I wouldn't want you to argue. You're such close
and loving sisters, it would be tragic and disruptive to the household."

"You're so right," Kasumi agreed. "We're fine. Nothing's wrong. We're
getting along just fine."

Nabiki felt like throwing up at the sigh and delighted look Kachiko gave. It
was like she was reading lines from a 'How to Behave Like A Proper and
Submissive Housewife' book. Something was definitely going on.

"So what shall we do next? Prepare dinner?" Kachiko asked.

Kasumi said, "Actually, I was thinking we might do something else. How about
we dress you up and surprise Father by having you ask him out on a date?"

Kachiko drew back, obviously scandalized. "I couldn't do that. He's so...
old."

The reaction seemed to confuse Kasumi. "But he's your husband. It's time you
started treating him as such."

Kachiko made a face like she had just sucked on a lemon. "I would never
marry someone in their twilight years; I'd end up a lonely widow in less
than a decade. He should marry someone else, like Mrs. Saotome, except she's
already married. Someone like that, though. Old, I mean."

"But older men are so much more interesting," Kasumi insisted.

"Absolutely not," Kachiko said firmly. "What I want in a man is someone
closer to my age so we have something in common. Someone strong, who would
be the man of the house, while I raise children and keep the household
running. It would be the perfect joining." She sighed.

"Father is all those things," Kasumi insisted.

"I was actually thinking more of... Ranma," Kachiko gave a girlish giggle
and blushed. "I can't believe I said that out loud."

"But Ranma's engaged to Akane." Kasumi pointed out.

"Ranma is supposed to marry a Tendou," Kachiko corrected. "I would be
perfect for the role, and the sooner the better. I'm already seventeen, and
need to plan for the future. If I haven't found a decent fianc� by the time
I graduate high school, I'll probably never find one since I'll be getting
too old. I'll practically be a spinster by then."

Kasumi gained an uncharacteristically cross look at the unintentional
insult.

Kachiko was lost in a fantasy world. "And we should have children right
away. I wonder if they'll look more like me or Ranma."

That was it! Nabiki decided. As it stood now, this person in front of her
could not be regarded as Kachiko Tendou. She ran through a list of possible
reasons for the girl's sudden shift in personality. Every scenario was
considered, from ghostly possession to a bump on the head and accompanying
character inversion that caused the change. Nabiki had to figure out the
source before she could come up with the cure. Since Kachiko would have
fought with her dying breath to keep from saying the words that were coming
from her mouth, and the lack of rampant destruction around the home, it
meant one of two things: either the change was instantaneous or subtle.

Nabiki tried to figure out when the change occurred to narrow things down.
Discovering the 'when' would help determine the 'how.' Kachiko was perfectly
normal early on, causing her usual brand of chaos and panic much in the same
way Ranma caused his. It was only after Nabiki had awakened from her nap
that the bizarre transformation had occurred.

She said to Kachiko, "When did you have this sudden change of heart
regarding home and marriage?"

Before Kachiko could respond, Kasumi said, "Nabiki, please don't distract
Mother. This is very important talk regarding Father."

"Please don't call me Mother. It's very improper," Kachiko told her.

Kasumi appeared hurt. "But you said it was all right."

"That was before, when I was confused. Now that I don't have unimportant
things cluttering up my mind, I can think more easily. You're older than me,
and people would get the wrong impression and think I'm old and married if
you call me Mother. That won't do at all. I need to find a good husband to
take care of me, and that's nearly impossible when you have a child."

It took all Nabiki had to keep from filling the room with the sound of
retching at the inane talk. It wasn't just the words, it was the vacuous way
in which Kachiko was saying it. The situation was intolerable.

Nabiki was still considering what to do when the familiar voice of Ranma
called out, "I'm home!"

The effect was instantaneous upon Kachiko. She blushed furiously and hurried
toward the front door, Nabiki watched as she moved in a very ladylike manner
instead of the full bore run she normally would have displayed if she had
wanted something that badly. Apparently the change was total, affecting even
her instincts as well as conscious decisions.

By the time Nabiki arrived, Kachiko was already on her knees helping a
confused Ranma off with his shoes. Once she was done, she remained on her
knees and nearly prostrated herself before him with her broom perched across
her lap. "How was your day?"

Ranma was obviously confused by both Kachiko's choice of dress and manner.
"Ah, fine."

"Was it eventful? You said that Mr. Hibiki person who picks on you learned
some new martial arts technique and wanted to see how good it was by
challenging you."

The topic shifted Ranma's attitude slightly. "Yeah, well, that turned out to
be a bust. It was some special pressure point he thought would send me into
convulsions. What it really did was cause people to convulse in laughter.
Ryouga hates feeling like he's being laughed at, so he stopped using it as
soon as he figured out what it did, and I beat him easily."

Kachiko rose to her feet, looping one arm in Ranma's and holding the broom
in the other "Why don't you tell me all about it while I serve you lunch?"

The gesture and close proximity had Ranma reacting in his usual manner by
darting out of her grasp, which was surprisingly easy. "You're acting funny.
What's with the get up? Did Mom make you start wearing one because you lost
the fight?"

Kachiko fingered her kimono mournfully. "You don't like what I'm wearing?"

Nabiki could practically see the warning lights shoot off in Ranma's head,
which was unusual, since he frequently missed the effect of his sometime
crass words. Perhaps in this case it was more the strangeness of the
reaction that had caught his attention than a sudden increase in his
empathy.

Quickly, Ranma said, "No, it looks okay. It's just you usually don't wear
stuff like that. You're tend to be more... casual."

Pride filled Kachiko's voice. "Well, I intend on being much more proper and
formal from now on."

"Why?" Ranma asked.

"To find a good husband, of course."

The way she batted her eyes at Ranma made him take a half-step back. Before
he could back away out of reach, her hand darted out to ensnare his. She
began to lead him away, saying, "You must be famished. Please, let serve you
lunch."

The talk of being fed rather than being romanced relaxed Ranma slightly, and
his stomach chose to grumble at that moment. Letting his stomach take over,
he allowed himself to be led to the kitchen and sat down.

It was as Kachiko began setting down the trays of food she had prepared
earlier that Nabiki finally noticed what was out of place; she was keeping
the broom close by her side. At first, Nabiki had assumed the time lost girl
was in too much of a hurry to greet Ranma and forgot to leave it behind.
However, when they passed the broom closet a second time, she hadn't given
it a glance. Now she was serving Ranma in an incredibly awkward way with the
food in one hand and the broom in the other. She was clutching it like it
was a precious treasure rather than a common household item.

"I made this just for you," Kachiko beamed.

Ranma's mouth watered at the sight. "Thanks. What's the occasion?"

Kachiko sat across from him and stared lovingly in his eyes. "No reason."

Ranma's appetite left him under that adoring stare. Sensing the time was
ripe, Nabiki walked over to Ranma, leaned over to snare him by the arm, and
pulled him to his feet. "There's something I need to discuss with you in
private, Ranma. It's about some pictures of a certain redhead and a
kendoist." She reassured her mother, "I'll bring him right back."

Ranma's continuing confusion made him passive as he allowed himself to be
led from the room, Kachiko's eyes following him the entire way.

Once they were out of earshot, Nabiki leaned in close and whispered
conspiratorially, "Okay, Saotome, I think even you can tell something's
wrong with Kachi."

"You're telling me. I'd say she's up to something, but I don't know what. I
didn't have her pegged as this good an actress."

Nabiki shook her head. "She's not. She was spouting a bunch of garbage long
before you showed up. Something's changed her personality. You know all
about personality changes, don't you?"

Ranma shivered, remembering more than one past incident. "Okay, so what do
we do about it? Hit her in the head a few times?"

"While that might be therapeutic for us more than her, no. I think I have it
figured out. It has something to do with the broom she's been dragging
around. It hasn't left her side since I've seen her, even when she was
trying to woo you."

"Yeah, you're telling me. I'm starting to get uneasy with all of her batting
her eyes at me and talking about marriage." Ranma shuddered at the word. "I
mean, I know she's said she's interested in me before, not that I'm
interested in her, of course, but I mean she's always been real clear about
not wanting to get married, and she actually doesn't try stuff most of the
time. And the few times she does, it's never anything serious. Now she's
doing everything but grabbing on to me. It's really freaking me out."

Nabiki said, "With any luck, once I get that broom from her, we'll figure
out how to turn her back to normal."

Ranma suddenly became suspicious. "Hey, why are you so determined to help
her? If she's acting like this, I can't see you two butting heads and trying
to one up each other like you usually do. I thought you might like her
acting all homey and stuff."

Nabiki made a sour face. "No way. It's unnatural and disturbing to see her
behaving this way. Besides, she's not as big a pain as she used to be."

"Sounds like you're almost buddies."

The half-lidded stare Nabiki shot Ranma almost made him cringe. "Coming from
anyone else, I'd make them pay, but given the sort of people you regard as
'buddies', I can see you thinking that. Now, you distract Kachi, and I'll
nab the broom."

Ranma agreed and the two reentered the kitchen.

"What were you two doing?" There was a hint of suspicion tinged with
jealousy in Kachiko's voice.

"Talking about you." Ranma moved close to Kachiko and grasped her hand. "I
can't help distracting you. I mean, I find you distracting," he quickly
corrected. Luckily, Kachiko seemed to miss the slip. "I keep getting lost in
those brown eyes of yours, which are like pools of dirty water."

Even in Kachiko's altered stated of mind, she was uncertain if she was being
insulted or flattered.

Nabiki decided to make her move before Ranma truly bungled things. Next time
she needed him to romance someone, she was playing Cyrano and feeding him
the lines. But his bumbling attempts at compliments were serving the true
goal: that of distraction. He had managed to gain all of Kachiko's,
admittedly confused, attention. Nabiki used that opening to snatch the broom
from her progenitor's grasp.

The effect was instantaneous as Kachiko gasped, "Give me that back. Give me
that back right now!"

Nabiki bolted out of the room. Ranma tried to grab Kachiko and flatter her
some more, but the girl regained some of her surprising quickness and darted
away from his hand. Without pausing, she ran as fast as she could after
Nabiki.

Ranma was about to follow when he was forced to stop by someone that hurled
themselves between him and the doorway. He was stunned by the identity of
the person preventing him from moving. "Kasumi, what are you doing?"

Kasumi remained where she was. "Mother has to get her broom back. Nabiki had
no business taking it from her."

Ranma was at a loss. He couldn't just move Kasumi. It was Kasumi. It would
have been... wrong. He decided the best thing to do was reason with the girl
and help her see things his way. "Kasumi, it's obvious Kachi's acting weird
and that broom's probably responsible for it."

"No, she's not! She behaving normal finally!" Kasumi insisted with unusual
vehemence.

Now Ranma thought he understood. The influence of the broom was affecting
Kasumi too. Since her normal behavior was a lot like Kachiko's current one,
it was hard to notice. Ranma sighed. There was only one way he could remove
her from his path.

"I'm sorry, Kasumi. Shoubakuten!" and he poked a spot in her stomach.

Instantly, Kasumi convulsed in laughter.

That gave Ranma the opportunity he needed to dart past her.

xxxxxxxx

The hot pursuit made Nabiki silently curse. While it was obvious the broom
was the cause of the change, she had hoped removing it would also remove its
influence. Obviously she was going to have to figure out something else, but
only after she hid the cursed item from sight.

Nabiki decided she needed to get outside. She was rapidly loosing her wind,
and needed to find some place where she could hide. Just as she made a hard
turn around a corner, the broom started to slip from her grasp. She caught
it before it could truly fall, though the bottom scraped across the ground.

"Ooooo," Nabiki said in awe as she watched the bristles play across the
ground. That was sort of... fun. Perhaps she should try it again, just to
see if it would produce the same effect.

Xxxxxxxx

By the time Ranma arrived at the scene, things had taken a turn for the
worse. Now Nabiki and Kachiko were fighting over the broom, which was to be
expected once Kachiko caught up, which was inevitable since Nabiki was not
very quick to begin with. However, the problem was along a different line.

"It's mine! Give it back to me! I want to clean with it."

"No way! It's my broom! I want to sweep with it!"

"It's mine!"

"No, mine!"

"Mine!"

"Mine!"

The tug of war was disturbing. Never in Ranma's wildest dreams would he have
pictured those two fighting it out to clean a house. This had to stop now,
before the infectious cursed item affected Akane as well.

Ranma executed a running leap, snatching the bone of contention from between
the two fighting girls. He then landed and leaped again high into the
branches of a tree and out of the reach of anyone on the ground. Kachiko, in
her right mind, would have easily been able to leap that high, but Ranma was
counting on the curse to make her continue acting 'ladylike' and prevent her
from accessing her martial arts skills.

Both girls ran until they were directly under the branch Ranma was standing
on. They looked up at him imploringly.

"Give it back!" they cried out as one.

"No way! It's screwing up your heads!"

"We like being this way!" they said in unison again.

This had to end. Since taking the broom away was doing no good, and Ranma
sure as hell didn't want to get splashed with water and start acting like a
'traditional' girl, he did the only thing he could think of.

He broke the broom over his knee.

Both girls stared up, horrified.

It suddenly occurred to Ranma that perhaps breaking the item was not the
best idea in the world. After all, one might have needed it to undo the
damage it already done, and now the changes might have become permanent.

"You stupid !#$%!" Kachiko cried out, and leaped up.

The power behind the leap easily shot her high enough in the air to be level
with the distracted Ranma. A hard right fist lashed out, striking him
cleanly in the jaw and knocking him from his lofty perch. He hit the ground
hard, landing on his head solidly enough to leave even him stunned.

The instant Kachiko landed, she was on top of him, ripping the bottom of her
kimono as she straddled his waist, grabbed him by the collar, and started
shaking him so fast his head was a blur.

"Maybe we can tape it back together," Ranma said.

"Don't be an idiot! We'll never be able to tape that broom together!"
Suddenly, the desire to break Ranma in half, like he had the broom, left
Kachiko. "Wait a minute, why am I getting so worked up over a broom?" She
released Ranma's collar.

It was almost more than Ranma could hope. "How do you feel about marrying
out of high school, minding a house, and raising a family?"

Kachiko gave him a look of disgust. "Look, I told you before, I still have
my whole life ahead of me, and have no interest in marrying young, any guy I
marry is doing half the housework, and while my opinion on children has been
undergoing a bit of a change lately, I do not want any kids for a good long
while. So you can just sit on that marriage proposal."

Ranma released a sigh of relief. A punch to the jaw was worth things
returning to the status quo. Then he realized what Kachiko had just said.
"Wait a minute, I wasn't proposing."

"Sure, sure, back off now after getting all caught up in the heat of the
moment," Kachiko said dismissively. "I don't blame you for getting all hot
and bothered. I have that effect on guys sometimes. Did you know I was once
abducted by a foreign prince who wanted to marry me? Oh, sure, he thought I
was Wakaba, but I taught him a lesson and made him swear not to go after
her. She was so angry with his attempt, she nearly blew him up in the
zeppelin that was his base of operations." Actually, Wacky Wakaba had nearly
messed up and blew Kachiko up as well as the dirigible, but accidents
happened. " He did try wooing me at first, but being disgustingly wealthy
doesn't impress me anymore than coming from a reputable family does. I'm
marrying for love or nothing. So you're going to have to work hard to
impress me if you're thinking that far in the future."

"What's this about Ranma proposing to Kachi?!"

Ranma winced. Of course, since this was the worst possible time, Akane would
appear, overhear the tail end of the conversation, and assume the worst. "It
wasn't a proposal!" Not that shouting out an excuse would work, just that he
had the satisfaction of knowing he tried.

"It sounded like a proposal to me," Kachiko said.

Akane tapped her foot impatiently, anger obviously growing.

Nabiki just stood by the sidelines, relieved at not finding dusting the most
fascinating thing in the world anymore.

Ranma shouted, "It was not a proposal! Besides, why would I want to marry
some flat-chested tomboy anyway?"

Kachiko's eyebrow twitched slightly. "So, if you're interested in a quiet,
traditional girl with a big rack, why aren't you asking Kasumi out?"

"I didn't say I want that type of girl either," Ranma retorted.

"You want someone that's bright, yet disturbingly manipulative?"

Nabiki coughed irritably.

"I didn't say that either," Ranma said.

Kachiko let out a tired sigh. "Do you even have any idea of what you really
want?"

Ranma was about to snap out a reply, but stopped. He shifted uncomfortably
with Kachiko still on top of him. "Well...."

"You don't do you?" she pressed on.

"Well...."

The anger seemed to drift away from Kachiko. She stopped straddling Ranma as
she rose to her feet. "At least we got that straightened out. Sakura always
said 'You'll know what you're interested in when you find it and become
interested'. The more I think about it, the more I'm convinced she was
right. She could be pretty smart about some things. So don't let it get you
down. You'll figure it out someday, just like everyone else does." She gave
him a friendly pat on the head.

Kachiko headed to the house, leaving a dumbfounded Ranma still on the
ground. She looked over her shoulder, "By the way, thanks for helping to
free me from that cursed broom." She gave Nabiki a thanks as well before
reentering the house. Nabiki followed right behind her.

Ranma slowly rose to his feet. That was decidedly odd. His slightly scathing
commentary hadn't ended in him being swatted. He wasn't sure exactly how it
ended, but it was better than usual.

As he began to walk to the house, he noticed Akane had remained outside.
While it was obvious she was no longer angry with him, she looked at him
with an unmistakably dour expression. "You really don't know what you want,
do you?"

The question coming from Akane made him even more uneasy than when Kachiko
had asked it in the heat of her anger. "Well...."

"I see." Akane walked back into the house, obviously depressed.

Ranma was left staring at her back as she retreated from his sight. He
wasn't sure what to do. He wasn't even sure why she was depressed, so how
could he know what it would take to cheer her up? All he knew was he hadn't
done anything wrong for a change. In fact, he felt an odd sense of peace
over having finally admitted (well, not in so many words, but everyone
seemed to understand what he meant) certain things that had been bothering
him for a while, but he had never been able to say aloud.

Deciding it would be best to leave matters to themselves, it was a Ranma
with mixed feelings that reentered the house to be alone for a while.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxx

"I don't think this is necessary, Mother."

"Yes, it is. Now continue."

"But it seems so childish."

"That's because what you did was childish. I mean really, you should test
brooms to make sure they aren't cursed."

"But it wasn't cursed. It worked perfectly fine."

"That's enough out of you, now obey your mother. I mean really, what is it
with you guys and using magical items all the time? It's like you're
addicted to shortcuts or something. There are no shortcuts in life. You just
have to slog through it, making mistakes, offending people, and creating
enemies while doing the best that you can, just like I did. You follow that
way of life, and you can't go wrong: look at how I've turned out. Stop
giving me those hurt puppy dog eyes. It's not going to work this time. Now
keep going."

"Fine." Kasumi's retort was almost petulant as she returned to writing 'I
Will Not Give People Cursed Items' five hundred times. She had been so
close, too. Although now that she thought about it, she had inadvertently
brought back another, less pleasant, attribute her mother had possessed when
Kasumi was a child. Something she had forgotten after her mother died,
opting to recall more pleasant memories and burying the bad.

Punishing unruly children. Kachiko Tendou always had been good at that.

xxxxxxxx

[End Notes]
There, you see? I haven't abandoned this. In fact, it's getting closer to
the end with each chapter. I'm over the halfway point (according to the
outline), and hope to have it done before the end of the year, depending on
how the muse feels.

Kudos to anyone picking up on the Stepford reference.

Thanks for reading.

And special thanks to:
Rakhal for looking up the Soun Hinako thing an Chris Horton for prereading
and figuring out the battle cry for the laughing point technique Ranma used
on Kasumi.

Also thanks to:
Eternal Lost Lurker
Michael Chase
David Tai
Chris Horton
The Apprentice





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