*Disclaimer*
Ranma 1/2 is owned by Rumiko Takahashi, Shonen Sunday Comics, Viz
Video, and a bunch of other people who are not me. Use of the
associated characters is done without their permission. Please
don't sue me.
Tail Kinker Presents
The Sixth Club
Costuming by BurgerBill (burger@contrabandent.com)
Casting by ChaosBurnFlame (bencarver@charter.net)
Stunts by Kitsy (kitsy@cogeco.ca)
Nabiki almost smiled as she stared up at the little camera.
"Found you, you little bastard..."
She pulled out a pair of wire-cutters, and reached behind the
camera. A single click, and the view went dark.
The First Club: Yearbook
"I tell you, it's uncanny. The girl has a talent for avoiding
me, it seems."
"Come on, Nabiki." Mayuko Yanagi was the editor-in-chief for the
school's 1995 Yearbook. "How hard can it be for you to get a
shot of the girl?"
"You don't understand." Nabiki flipped open her binder. "Look.
Not even school photos. Which means no mug shot for the student
list."
"That is odd." Mayuko frowned. "Was she sick that day?"
"No idea. No excuse was given."
"Really."
"And every time I go somewhere she's supposed to be - you know
she's in the school newspaper club?"
"I'd heard that."
"But I've never seen her at a meeting." Nabiki paused long
enough to tear into her bento. "What's worse, I'm supposed to be
head of the photography department, and she's in that department.
Should make it doubly easy to get a shot of her. But whenever
she's around, I never have a camera!"
Mayuko smirked.
"It's like she's got a sixth sense where cameras are involved."
Nabiki sighed. "I just don't see what I can do about this."
"I can ask someone else to get the shot--"
"No." Nabiki shook her head. "This is a matter of pride."
* * * * *
"Hey, Kiyomi!"
Takudo Kiyomi, third-year student at Fuurinkan High School,
whirled about, pulling her books tight against her chest.
"Sorry!" Sugita raised his hands defensively. "Didn't mean to
startle you."
"It's okay, I guess." Kiyomi's voice was hesitant and quiet.
"Listen, Nabiki told me she need you to get ahold of her. It's
for the yearbook, and very important."
"Okay, thank you."
"She stressed important." Sugita shrugged helplessly. "There's
not a single picture of you in the yearbook."
"I'll talk to her." Kiyomi smiled shyly. "I'm not very
photogenic."
"Photo-whatsit?"
"You're in the yearbook club, and you don't know what photogenic
means?"
"I'm not in the yearbook club; Nabs just gets me to run messages
for her."
"And doesn't like it when you call her Nabs."
"Yeah."
Kiyomi smiled weakly. "She chewed me out once for it."
"Well...message delivered." Sugita shrugged again. "It's not my
fault if you ignore it."
"You're probably right."
* * * * *
"You're sure this is legal?"
Nabiki smirked. "Heard about my reputation, have you?" She
gestured Hiroji closer. "First of all, we aren't getting
anything restricted, like financial history or criminal records.
We just want vital statistics."
She logged onto the computer and started some programs. "Let's
use Takudo Kiyomi as an example. Since we still have nothing on
her for the yearbook." She entered the name, and the computer
on the other end of the link spat back the information. "Born on
the fifth of February, 1977. Father is dead, mother works as a
nurse. We don't really need that. Contact info and such, we
don't need either, unless you want to try interviewing her."
"Might be a plan."
"Okay, grab a pen. I'll get her phone number and address...You
know, it'd probably be easier just to ambush her in the school
halls."
Hiroji jotted down Kiyomi's contact information. "Probably, but
why not try it this way?"
Nabiki shrugged. "Fine." Something caught her attention.
"Looks like someone else is interested in Kiyomi."
"What do you mean?"
"The file has been queried recently." She tapped the screen.
"Wonder who it was?"
The Second Club: Volunteers
"Where's the profit in this for you, Nabs?"
"Don't call me that." Nabiki adjusted the candy-striper uniform,
then pulled out her cap and began trying to force it into
something resembling its original form.
"I just don't understand why you'd volunteer. Volunteering, by
definition, does not include pay."
Nabiki turned sharply. "Look, Urako. This goes no further than
you or I. Specifically, that flake Kiyomi and my clueless
brother-in-law must not hear it, okay?"
"Okay. I promise."
Nabiki sighed. "I don't volunteer because I expect anything in
return. Really, I enjoy helping people, okay?"
"This is why you gouge them for as much as you can?"
"Family comes first. With Daddy being so damn useless, I have to
do something to bring in the cash."
"Fair enough." Urako chuckled. "Nabiki, the do-gooder. Who
woulda guessed."
"Well, there's lots you don't know about me." Nabiki turned back
to the mirror, and pulled the cap onto her head.
"Really. I heard you were in the Girl Scouts."
"Also true. You wouldn't believe the contacts you can make
there."
"Fair again." Urako smirked. "You know that Takudo came around
the Volunteers' Club? She said she might want to volunteer in an
elderly-care ward."
"She's a flake. I wouldn't trust her to look after a hamster,
let alone an elder."
* * * * *
"It's getting late, Arato-san. You have to go back to your room
now."
"Oh, fiddlesticks." The old woman pushed her wheelchair away
from the computer. "You know, I never would have guessed that
this device would be so easy to learn. They seem so complex."
"Yes, but they've come a long way over the years." Kiyomi smiled
hesitantly. "And you are quite intelligent, Arato-san."
"You're just trying to flatter an old woman." Arato-san yawned.
"Still...it's probably a good time for a break...my eyes tend to
hurt if I stare at the screen too long. But it's so nice--I got
a language course off the Internet yesterday. I'm learning
English, believe it or not." She switched to broken and thickly
accented English. "<My learn English fast, soon be able speak
good.>"
In unaccented and flawless English, Kiyomi replied, "<I have no
doubt. You're getting better every day.>"
"Ah!" The old woman shook her head. "I'm not that good yet, I'm
afraid. You seem to have a talent for the language."
Kiyomi blushed, and ran a hand through her long hair. "I always
did well in English class."
"Well, it's always a pleasure to see you. Pity you can't turn up
till seven o'clock."
Once the old woman was safely back into her room, Kiyomi stole
back to the computer. The machine had been left unattended for
the last half hour, and was still connected to the Internet.
Kiyomi opened a new Email message.
To: tendo_nabiki@nerima.jp
From: takudo_kiyomo@fuurinkan.jp.edu
Subject: I know why you volunteer...
Did you know that all of the drugs in the hospital are counted by
computer? Even the smallest amount of aspirin that goes missing
is immediately tracked. But I know where the logs are kept. And
for one hundred thousand yen, those logs just might get
deleted...
The Third Club: Financial
"I can't believe that she's tried to blackmail me!"
Shoko smirked. "What's the matter with that? I thought that
blackmail was a standard business practise for you."
"Ha ha." Nabiki pushed through the cafeteria doors. "Very
funny. All rise."
It pleased her that she could command the Financial Club as
though she were Empress or something. The entire room snapped to
attention, and bowed. She seated herself at the head of the
table, and waved a hand. "Please, be seated."
Fujita-sensei had long ago abandoned the Financial Club to
Nabiki's tender mercies. No teacher supervision meant no
controls on their actions, which meant that the Financial Club
had actually managed to pay all student-related costs--dances,
sports teams and the like--and even put a good-sized amount of
money towards the hiring of a new Physics teacher. Of course,
the means that the Financial Club often employed only rarely fell
into the category of 'ethical business practises.'
"Okay, first thing on the agenda for today: Sales of Tendo Akane
merchandise have fallen recently, no doubt due to the fact that
she and Ranma have officially announced that they will be tying
the knot next year. On the other hand, there are still more than
enough stupid people out there that don't seem to realize that
Ranma and 'Ranko' are the same person."
One of the junior members raised his hand. "Can we maybe
compensate for that by getting some nude pics of Akane?"
Nabiki narrowed her eyes. "That's my sister you're talking
about. I don't mind selling cheesecake photos of her--heck, she
doesn't mind either--but real nudes?" She shook her head. "I
think not."
"What if she agrees?"
Nabiki raised an eyebrow. "You going to ask her?"
"Uhhh...Maybe we can fake some up?"
"Even if you did, the answer is no. I won't betray my sister
that way."
Another member spoke up. "What about your brother-in-law?"
Nabiki grinned.
* * * * *
Liquid freon was much easier to get ahold of than most people
suspected, and it took only a small amount poured into the lock
to render it fragile. A single tap from a small ball-peen hammer
cracked the cylinder, and the door swung open.
Kiyomi stepped into the bedroom, and quickly started setting up
cameras. They were tiny wireless devices, nearly invisible
against the pattern of the bedroom's wallpaper. She paused as
she placed the second camera; near where she wanted to place it,
there was already a camera.
"Odd."
She glanced around, then quickly disabled the camera.
A few snapshots managed to find their way into her pockets, but
she did not find what she sought within Nabiki's binder.
"Probably on the computer."
It took her a mere three minutes to crack the encryption on the
computer, and she was busily transferring files when the knock
sounded on the bedroom door.
"Yo, Nabiki. You in there?"
Kiyomi stood up, and started glancing around the room
frantically.
"Hey, this lock is bust." The door swung open, and Ranma stepped
in. She was wearing only her boxers, and was towelling her hair.
Her legs and breasts still glistened with bathwater. "Nabs, what
the heck happened--"
She paused, as she got her first look at the intruder. The girl
wore large wire-rimmed glasses, and had very long black hair,
reaching nearly to the floor. She held a small binder tight
across her chest.
"Who the heck are you?"
"Umm...Nabiki sent me to get this binder."
"Really?" She glanced back at the door. "She didn't give you a
key, huh? And you hadda break the lock, because she needed the
binder real bad? So bad that you had time to play with her
computer?"
Kiyomi stepped forward quickly. "Please don't tell anyone I was
here. I'll leave the binder...and I'll do anything you ask."
"Whoa. Anything?"
Her expression shifted, becoming crafty. "Anything at all." She
raised one hand, and cupped Ranma's breast.
"What are you--"
"Hush. We don't want anyone else to hear, do we?" Kiyomi
tweaked a nipple, causing Ranma to gasp. "But we should probably
go to your room, so we're not interrupted." She tilted her head.
"Trust me...I know how to make a woman feel very--"
Visions of mallets aimed directly at his skull filled Ranma's
mind before it shut down in an attempt to save itself. "I didn't
see nothin'. Get outta here!" Ranma turned and bolted from the
room.
Kiyomi chuckled. "So predictable."
* * * * *
"Pursuant to your suggestion of two days ago, Miyoko: I can get
the pictures easily enough. The only problem is convincing Ranma
that it's really in his best interest."
"How will you manage that?"
Nabiki smirked. "I can't tell you that; I'd be giving up trade
secrets. Don't worry. We'll get the pics easily enough."
"All right, Nabs. You're the boss."
"Don't call me that. And yes, I am." She snapped her binder
shut and stood. "This meeting is adjourned. Good work,
everyone, and we'll see you on Monday."
As the students filed out, one approached Nabiki. "You seemed
kind of out of it today, Sempai."
"Someone broke into my room."
"Really?"
"Yeah." Nabiki held up the binder. "And they got a good look at
this." She shook her head. "There's lots of things in here that
could get me burned, you know?"
"Really."
Nabiki glanced around, then leaned in close. "In here are all my
financial records. Including where my money has been invested.
Plus the names of people that owe me money. Plus..." She
glanced around again. "Gosunkugi got some nude shots of me, but
I got the negatives away from him. He didn't put up much of a
fight."
"You beat up Gosunkugi?"
"Kasumi could beat him up." Nabiki smirked. "I normally keep 'em
in here. Luckily, they weren't in here when whoever it was stole
it."
"Nudes...of you?"
"Believe it or not." Nabiki shook her head. "Why someone would
want to look at me nude..."
"You're quite well built, sempai."
"Thanks, Tomoe. I'd rather not be leered at, if it's all the
same to you."
"Maybe it was that Kiyomi girl you've been complaining about."
Tomoe leaned a little closer. "I've heard that she's a
hentai...she likes girls. Know what I mean?"
Nabiki shuddered. "I hope not."
Tomoe giggled, and she and Nabiki walked out of the cafeteria,
leaving it empty behind them.
The Fourth Club: Scouts
To: takudo_kiyomi@fuurinkan.jp.edu
From: reader@anime.NOSPAM.net
Subject: Tendo Nabiki
The pics of Nabiki in her bikini were well received. Your
ability at gathering such has been proven, including break-and-
enter and computer data theft. I am willing to offer you a
substantial monetary reward for nude pictures of Nabiki. Remove
'NOSPAM' to reply.
Kiyomi grinned. Now this would prove to be a challenge.
* * * * *
"I still can't believe you'd just let her wander off with my
ledger, Ranma."
"What was I supposed to do? She grabbed my boob, for cryin' out
loud."
"Wimp." Nabiki tossed her jacket across her desk's chair. "You
could have stopped her. From groping you, that is. Unless she
was a martial artist or something?"
Ranma shook his head. "No, I woulda sensed that."
"I'm sure you would." She started unbuttoning her shirt. "If
there's one thing you know, it's martial arts. It's the only
thing you know, but..."
"Hey!" Ranma suddenly realized that Nabiki was in the process of
disrobing, and bolted for the door.
"Hold on." Nabiki sighed. "I need you in here for this."
"No, you don't."
"Just look the other way, will you?"
"Fine." Ranma turned and walked across the room, and stared out
the window.
Nabiki sighed, and finished unbuttoning her shirt. "For pity's
sake, you've seen enough female flesh already. What with the
curse." She paused, and stared up at one corner. "Dammit." She
reached over, grabbed her umbrella, and savagely stabbed at the
camera in the corner. It exploded in a shower of plastic and
glass.
"I'll clean that up later."
"Why do you need me here, Nabs?"
"I need more pictures."
"What!?" Ranma started to turn, then remembered why he should
not. "Look, we just did a swimsuit series recently. And before
that was a fresh series of chemise-and-panties, and if my
commission was anything to judge by, that sold for a lot. Why do
we need more?"
"Oh, come on. It's for a good cause."
"What cause?"
"'Cause I need a hundred thousand yen."
The sound of a metal buckle hitting the floor, and the bedsprings
creaked; her skirt was off, and she was now removing her panties.
Ranma rolled his eyes. "You do this just to torment me?"
"Partially."
"Seriously: What good cause is this?"
"Trust me, it's something you'll love. Right up your alley."
"I bet."
"Look, it's only going to be twelve exposures, and only one of
those will be used. The pay is fifty thousand yen."
"For one pic?"
"Yep. And it's not even something you'll be embarrassed by;
after all, you often run around her in your girl form wearing
even less."
He sighed. "What would I be wearing?"
"Exactly what I'm wearing right now. You can turn around now."
He did, and his eyes widened. He raised his hands defensively.
"Oh, no. No way. No way in hell."
* * * * *
Kiyomi peeked into the room. "This the Scout meeting?"
"Yes." The woman--a short, rather pudgy lady dressed in a Scout
Master's uniform--smiled broadly. "Are you interested in
joining?"
"I might be." She glanced around the room. "Is this the entire
club?"
"No, there are several members not present this evening."
"Someone said you'd have a camping trip soon."
The Scout Master nodded. "A week in Hokkaido, at the beginning
of the rainy season."
"And we'll be roughing it?"
"Oh, yes. Four girls to a tent, and no cable TV."
She glanced around. "Is there a girl named Fujita Tomoe here?"
"Yes, right over there."
Kiyomi followed the Scout Master's finger. "Thanks...I need to
talk to her."
The Fifth Club: Press
*Click*
"That's good. Turn to the left, Ranma, and put your foot up
on...Perfect!"
*Click*
"Grab that thing there. Put it between your legs. No, closer to
your belly...Good."
*Click*
"One more. Grab that box and smile wide for the camera."
*Click*
"Great." Nabiki walked over to the desk and started rewinding
the film. "I'll get these out to Hiroshi for processing."
"You're not gonna just take it to a commercial developer?"
"Heck no." Nabiki smirked. "They might just disappear, or get
damaged, or otherwise delayed...I'd rather take them to someone I
trust. And Hiroshi's got unlimited access to the school's dark
room, since he's part of the Press Club."
"Aren't you also in the Press Club?"
She sighed. "Yes. You know that."
"So why not develop 'em yourself?"
"I don't like the smell of the developing chemicals." She
glanced over her shoulder, then quickly turned back. "For pity's
sake, put something on!"
"Sorry!"
"Anyway. I also don't want to abuse my privileges as part of the
Press Club. It's easily my favourite club."
"Fair enough." Ranma spun the desk chair around and dropped into
it. She adjusted the terrycloth bathrobe in an attempt at
keeping it decent. "Anything else, then?"
"No, I don't think so."
Ranma grinned. "You got any more film?"
Nabiki paused. "Why?"
"I wanna do a photo shoot of you."
Nabiki shook her head. "No, Ranma. That has never been part of
our contract, and you know it."
"I know. But turnabout's fair play, right?"
Nabiki smiled. "You want me to wear what you were wearing,
right?"
"Yep."
"I dunno about that..."
"Nabs, c'mon. I bet nobody even knows you have that thing,
right? It's too small for you to begin with."
"I know, but..."
"You afraid someone's gonna see them?"
"Well..." Nabiki indicated the corner over her bed. "You
remember the camera I busted up there?"
"Yeah."
"I've found three in here so far. All of them seem to connect to
the Internet. There are very fine, almost hairlike wires that
carry the information back to the telephone junction box." She
sighed. "And who knows how many of those little boxes exist?
For all I know, there could be hundreds of nude pics of me on the
Internet already."
"So?"
"So if someone's breaking into my room and planting cameras over
my bed--remember I change while sitting on the bed, right?"
Nabiki shuddered. "It's seriously weirding me out."
Ranma smirked. "So all the more reason." He pointed across at
the bed, and the article of apparel sitting on the duvet. "See
if you'll fit into that."
"Ranma--"
"Do it, or I'm done with this!"
Nabiki bit her lip. "Fine. Turn around so I can change."
* * * * *
"I'll take these ones, Hiroshi."
"Thanks." Hiroshi tossed Kiyomi the rolls of film. "I'm out of
here; talk to you tomorrow."
Kiyomi watched him leave, then smirked. A handkerchief went
around her face, covering her nose, and she slipped into the
darkroom.
* * * * *
"Hey, Nabiki." Ranma pushed open the door. "Got those prints
yet?"
"Yes, Hiroshi brought them to me earlier today." Nabiki waved a
sheaf of pictures. "Here. You can pick the best ones from your
set and mine."
"From both?" Ranma looked up in surprise.
"Yeah...might as well try getting money for both."
"But..." Ranma glanced down at the photos. "You *never* sell
pictures of yourself."
"These ones..." Nabiki blushed. "These ones are special."
The Sixth Club: Drama
To: reader@anime.net
From: takude_kiyomi@fuurinkan.jp.edu
Subject: Tendo Nabiki
I've scanned and attached the pictures, encrypted. Awaiting
payment, and I'll give you the password to decrypt them.
The computer pinged, and Kiyomi noted with satisfaction that the
required funds had reached her PayPal account.
She glanced up at the security camera in the library, then down
at the computer. And smiled.
"Got you."
The traceroute program pinned down her anonymous contact's
physical location, as well as finally deciphering the means by
which he'd been breaking into the school's security system. She
still didn't know who was planting cameras, but those cameras
used the same means of communication.
"You're toast, pal." She stood up and turned to face the camera.
"Yes, you. The one who's been watching me all this time, been
watching everyone in Nerima. You, on the other end of this
computer link."
The long hair and the glasses came off. Nabiki tossed the whole
assembly onto the desk, and grinned.
"Not only have you paid thirty thousand yen for these photos, but
you'll discover, if you ever break the passwords, that they're
photos of me in my Scout uniform. I had to be careful which
cameras I broke, to make sure you could still see what I wanted
you to see. I had to make sure you'd believe it was a nude photo
shoot, not pics for the cover of the Girl Scout calendar.
"I've played both myself and Kiyomi for quite some time; I knew
I'd find a use for all that hair Ranma shed during the Dragon's
Whisker incident. So far, you're the only one who knows the
truth." She grinned wickedly. "And you're in North America, and
soon to be incommunicado."
She tapped a key, launching a spread of viruses towards their
target. And just before the link went dead, she was heard to
say, "I'm glad I let Akane talk me into the Drama Club last
year."
THE END
Author's Notes:
I've had an idea for a fic on the back burner for a while, but I
needed some help from my friends to pull it off. Their names are
in the credits at the beginning of the story, and I think this
would have been a much sadder fic without them.