Not too much to critique here, as that has never been my strong suit.
However, I did like this installment quite a bit as I have since I
discovered this story a few months back, so I just have this to say about
one small thing in here.

      In Altua, Saeni, on the last night before Baniesti.
end chapter 15

This line, and the text preceding it in the story, sent an actual chill down
my spine. Simple. Stark. Unassuming, but the promise of Mayhem lies in these
words. And I for one cannot wait to see what happens next.
Congrats, Mark, for constructing such a deeply involving story that one
simple line can evoke such a visceral reaction. I look forward to the next
installment of OACDYCSF. :)





             .---Anime/Manga Fanfiction Mailing List----.
             | Administrators - ffml-admins@anifics.com |
             | Unsubscribing - ffml-request@anifics.com |
             |     Put 'unsubscribe' in the subject     |
             `---- http://ffml.anifics.com/faq.txt -----'