Suggested changes: {before : after}
On Fri, 08 Aug 2003 05:13:52 -0400 Sean Danna
<carrotglace@mindspring.com> wrote:
"She wouldn't say anything," said the woman as she walked over to her.
{: "}She's been quiet all night up to now.{: "}
"The front page," she said quietly. She still had him in her grip and
{: he} could feel her shuddering.
"All right," muttered the woman in defeat. She'd figure out a way to
coax her into it again. It brought in droves of minor injuries in young
men. With herself as the {Doctor : doctor}, she couldn't go wrong. She never did
understand why her sister wanted to work in the hospital. The real money
was in the private sector. Her looks would fade, but her reputation
would remain.
As he had suspected. Carrot stood in front of the remains of his second
hideout. It had been torn to shreds. There was police tape everywhere.
He stood calmly staring at the scene. Carnage had come, and ripped the
place apart in frustration. Fortunately, the information he'd given the
{Real Estate : real estate} agent was all completely false, except for the financial
end. Spike was a good man to go to if you wanted to get things done. He
basically was the middleman, and knew who to go talk {too : to}. He never had
inquired just how high up the man was. He seemed to have a lot of
connections, but also seemed restricted to grunt work.
"He may not have been home," He grumbled to himself as he looked
towards the buildings surrounding him. "Is he patient enough to wait for
him?" Did he want to risk it? He didn't have Usagi to back him up at the
moment.
He walked away from the scene unobstructed. If Carnage was there, he
wasn't budging to come after him. "I don't think he's here {anymore."
Muttered : anymore," muttered} the boy. He growled as he started walking a little faster and
spoke into his phone. It wouldn't work if he was swinging with it. "Damn
it. Mei Lin, do you have any idea where Hibiki might be right now? He's
not home, and he's very lucky he wasn't."
The man grabbed her into a rough hug and pulled her ear up to his lips.
"That guy over there, the one giving orders." She nodded slowly. "That's
not a Yakuza, that's Spiderman. You have to keep quiet, he's fought with
that thing before, and what I do know about him tells me he isn't lying.
Please, calm down and keep quiet. We'll know more when we get where
we're going. I promise. The people he stays with are easier to talk {too : to},
and a lot nicer. We'll be fine with him. He's one of those heroic
types."
"Um, no," muttered {Noriko : Nuriko} softly. "He bought it. I was there."
"This is a nice neighborhood," said Gia flatly. "He's just paranoid,
he's always been that way. We can't do anything else out {her : here} tonight
anyway. We're gonna have to force him out of that bathroom tomorrow. It
won't be easy. He can stay there tonight for all I care."
"These are the nice people you were telling me about?" asked Nuriko as
she grabbed her boyfriend's neck rather forcefully. "What did you get
me into?! You asshole!"
All he said is that they were a lot nicer than Carrot, and they are.
Carrot frowned. He was standing in front of the bathroom {Mirror : mirror} looking
at his finished costume. "Gotta start on the spare later." A familiar
tingling made him slowly turn towards the door behind him. "What the? Aw
man! I just finished damn it!" He flipped of the light switch and opened
the door. Whoever it was, they were sneaking around the outside wall.
It wasn't like he could do anything anyway. Michiru would shoot him.
She may be lonely and miss him, but her aim will get better.
Haruka frowned as she walked down the street with a pair of sunglasses
over her eyes. She was dressed casually, in very masculine looking
clothes. It made her look like an incredibly beautiful man. It was early
in the evening, and things were quiet all over town in the wake of the
disaster. It gave her a bit of breathing room so to speak. The monster
had vanished, but it would be back. She had to find it before it found
her and destroyed half the city in {the :} battle again. It had gone
underground, into the sewers probably. That was a lot of area to cover
underground. It could hide easily in such an environment, and would know
them well probably.
The {Thief : thief} nimbly flipped out of the way and gasped as a small {scar : cut}
appeared on her cheek as Kei slashed at her with the knife as she
landed.
"Yeah. Look, I'm a superhero{: ,} nimrod. I thought we covered the whole I
am not a demon thing a while back. You know, defender of justice, bane
to criminals, all around nice guy."
Maybe all but the last.
"Maybe they'll kill each other?" said Haruka hopefully.
I hadn't realized that Carrot and Haruka are getting along.
"We're probably going to have to replace the doors around here pretty
regularly, doorknobs, light switches, that sort of thing." He sighed
heavily and hung his head. "This is why I don't do outside assignments.
I'm an assassin{: ,} damn it. I'm not cut out for this sort of thing."
Next Time: Carrot gets even more annoyed!
I'd ask how, but I already know it sucks to be him.