This one is rather short--and those who complained that the first chapter
was cliche and uninteresting and "could have been written better" will
probably find a lot to complain about here too.

Oh well.



=================================================

DISCLAIMERS, APOLOGIES, and RAMBLING

The following is a highly contrived piece of shite.

The following highly contrived piece of shite is based on characters from
Ranma 1/2 and other series.

Appropriate disclaimers will be posted at the beginning of each chapter.

Extreme suspension of disbelief is recommended for reading this story, as
many facets of reality are being disregarded in favour of the highly
contrived plot.

Feedback is encouraged. Flames are pointless, as the author is a flaming
retard.

...wait a minute, that isn't right. o.O;;

Ranma 1/2 is the property of Takahashi Rumiko, Shogakukan, Viz, and other
corporate entities who are not me.

Love Hina is the property of Akamatsu Ken, Kodansha, TV Tokyo, Bandai, and
other corporate entities who are not me.

No infringement is intended, no profit is being made, and I make no claims
of ownership to anything here except my own original characters.

=================================================

"But--Ane-ue--"

"The matter is settled. You will submit yourself as a bridal candidate for
Saotome Ranma."

"But--"

"This is my final word on the matter. It is for the honour of the family.
Unless that no longer holds any meaning for you."

"..."

"You'll cooperate then?"

"...yes, Ane-ue."

=================================================

R A N M A D A T E

=================================================

CHAPTER TWO:

KING OF THE HILLS (OR: THERE CAN BE ONLY TWO)

=================================================

"So, what's on the agenda for today?" Ranma asked as he walked into the
foyer. He'd risen early that morning and gone to the gymnasium wing of the
manor; now, an hour after sunrise, he was towelling sweat from his hair and
smiling broadly.

"Saotome-sama! You need to get ready for your date!" the maid, Haruka,
gasped, scandalised. "Those awful, ratty clothes--"

"I've just been workin' out, Haruka," Ranma groused. "Gimme a break."

"Still, you must--"

"I got time," Ranma said, stretching. "So, Kuromaki, what about that
schedule?"

Kuromaki bowed and retrieved a folder from a low table. He flipped it open,
blinked, and frowned. "Oh, dear."

"What's up?"

"It would appear--" Kuromaki shook his head, and passed the schedule over to
Ranma. "Well, see for yourself."

Ranma took the proffered page, glanced at it, and blinked.

"9 am...Formal challenge?!"

"There appears to be a letter of challenge enclosed within the itinerary,
Master Ranma. It reads," he cleared his throat, "'Saotome Ranma, you are
hereby challenged to a duel of honourable combat at the hill overlooking the
temple facing the court of the Emperor from the northwest, six kilometres
from Tokyo Tower, at the hour of nine in the morning--' today, of course--
'to determine your worthiness--' My word!"

Ranma grunted. "Sounds like somethin' Kunou would pull. Is it signed?"

"Yes, Master Ranma. By the girl you are supposed to be dating today."

"Oh...kay..." Ranma said slowly, blinking. He glanced over at Haruka. "I
guess these ratty ol' clothes'll be just fine then, huh?"

Haruka shook her head, muttered something, and wandered off. Ranma chuckled.

"A formal challenge, huh? I shoulda known somethin' like this was gonna
happen." Ranma sighed.

"What will you do, Master Ranma?" Kuromaki inquired politely.

Ranma looked at him as though he'd sprouted a second head. "You're kiddin',
right? I'm gonna go fight th' crazy chick, o' course."

Kuromaki blinked. "But--Master Ranma--your standing rule against fighting
girls..."

"Pretty much gone right out th' window," Ranma said with a shrug. "I mean, I
been thinkin'. A lotta th' people who try an' kill me are girls. All th'
girls I was engaged ta or who were after me before--well, they all fought
pretty okay, I guess. An' hell, I turn inta a girl, an' it don't make me
weak or nothin'. So..." He shrugged. "I mean, I don't like hittin' girls,
but I ain't gonna back down from a fight with anyone if they want their ass
kicked bad enough."

Kuromaki bowed. "Very good, sir. Shall I call Michaels and have him bring
the car around?"

"Yeah, it may take a while t' find th' place. Geez, what kinda crazy chick
are they tryin' t' hook me up with, anyway?"

=================================================

Ranma worried at first that he might be late for the challenge. He was
surprised, however, when LIMO-Z, after the challenge letter was fed through
a scanner on the dashboard, immediately pinpointed the precise location and
took off.

"You really landed a live one for today, huh?" Michaels asked.

"Looks like it. Geez, I thought I'd at least be leavin' THIS kinda crap
behind me when I signed on for this gig."

Michaels chuckled. "You'd die from the boredom."

"Nah, I--" Ranma paused. "Hmm. I guess I would get kinda bored, at that."

"We are nearing the specified location," LIMO-Z said. "Scanning the
area--one human life sign detected, female, estimated age fifteen. She is
armed--weapon analysis: a sword. Katana, classically forged, iron. An honour
blade. No other weapons detected in the vicinity. No electronic or
mechanical traps or eavesdropping devices detected. No electronic
transmissions detected."

Ranma looked through the window and saw a grassy hill looming ahead, a break
in the surrounding suburban sprawl. He could just make out a silhouetted
figure standing at the summit, waiting.

LIMO-Z slowed to a smooth stop less than a metre from the base of the hill.
Michaels turned to Ranma and said, "Good luck."

"Thanks." Rolling his shoulders and cracking his neck, Ranma stepped out of
the car and made his way up the hill.

=================================================

"So, you have come. You are not perhaps as cowardly as I might have
expected."

Ranma scowled. The girl standing across from him wore a loose white gi and a
red hakama; her long dark hair swayed in the soft breeze. Eyes full of
loathing glared at him from an otherwise pretty face. Her sword was drawn,
the scabbard tucked into the sash at her waist. "Yeah, I'm here. What th'
hell's your problem, anyway?"

"SILENCE!" The girl roared, levelling her sword at Ranma. "You will not
address me with such a crude tongue!"

"You wouldn't happen t' be related t' a guy named Kunou, wouldja?"

The girl drew herself up. "I would advise you to take this matter more
seriously, Saotome Ranma!"

"Yeah, yeah, whatever. Look, just tell me who th' hell you are, an' why th'
hell you wanna fight me."

The girl fixed him with an intense stare. "Aoyama Motoko, of the Shinmei
school of kendo. I seek to test your worthiness in battle, and, if possible,
remove you from this world to spare others the burden of having to endure
your crass, chauvinistic overtures."

Ranma blinked. "Okay, so...you signed up for this whole date thing...so you
could try an' kill me to keep me from datin' anyone?"

"I was forced to submit myself as a bridal candidate as a matter of family
honour!" Motoko shouted, anger flashing in her eyes. "Make no mistake,
Saotome Ranma: I do not desire you. I despise you. I will prove, by
defeating you, that you are unworthy of marriage into the Aoyama clan. I
will prove that the Shinmei school is superior, and would only be weakened
by the tainted blood of the likes of you."

Ranma bristled. "Oh yeah? Well I don't much like you either just now. An' if
you don't wanna marry me, you ain't gotta, cuz I got th' final say in who I
marry, an' it sure as hell ain't gonna be a crazy wannabe samurai chick like
you. If I wanted t' marry some wacko with a sword, I'd marry Kunou. So if
that's all this is about, then I'll just be on my way. Have a nice life." He
turned to leave.

"HOLD!"

The pigtailed martial artist sighed. "NOW what?"

Motoko strode forward, sword lewelled at Ranma's chest. "Forfeit to me, and
you forfeit your life. I would strike you down rather than allow your parade
of lechery to continue."

Ranma rolled his eyes. "Oh great, another violent tomboy callin' me a
pervert for no good reason."

"So. Others have seen the villainy in your heart."

"Yeah, yeah, I've heard all this shit before. Find a new one."

Motoko growled. "Enough! Shinmei-ryu, ZANKUUSEN!"

Ranma dropped and rolled down the hill as a flurry of vacuum slashes cleaved
the air where he'd been standing a moment ago. "Whoa!"

"Stand and fight!"

Ranma rolled to his feet, tensing and flexing his hands. "Alright, lady, you
just got your fight." Without further words, he blurred into motion,
striking low with a kick meant to send the kendoist toppling down the hill.
To his surprise, she parried with the flat of her blade, then swiftly
brought it around and slashed at his midsection, leaving a long, shallow cut
that stung as thin droplets of blood oozed forth. He sucked in his breath,
and dodged left as another slash followed the first. He then leapt straight
up, flying over Motoko and kicking her in the back of the head. As she
stumbled, he spun around, landing a midair kick to her shoulderblades that
knocked her flat on the grass. He leapt away, landing easily on the toes of
one foot, waiting.

Motoko stood, turning quickly, sword again at the ready. "You are quick."

"So're you." Ranma grinned. "Maybe this'll be fun."

"You mock me?" Motoko growled. "ZANGANKEN!"

Ranma let himself fall backwards, rolling with the momentum to avoid the
pressure strike. He then raced along the grade of the hill, rising behind
Motoko as she attempted to locate him. He tapped her on the shoulder. "Yo."

Motoko spun, lashing out wildly; Ranma caught her blade between his hands,
then swept her feet out from under her. "C'mon, you can do better than
that."

The kendoist surprised him by doing a forward flip, slamming her feet into
his chest. As he stumbled, she wrenched her sword free of his grip, then
stabbed at his throat.

"Ack!" Ranma yelped, ducking to the side; the blade missed his windpipe by
centimetres, but shaved a thin layer of skin off the side of his neck.
"Shit, that was close!"

"DIE!" Motoko snarled, pressing her attack. Her blade flashed as it blurred,
a dozen strikes, two dozen--the speed of her attack was impressive.

But, Ranma thought with a smirk, not fast enough.

"KACHUU TENSHIN AMAGURIKEN!" Open palms slapped away each strike of the
katana, closing ranks with the swordswoman; within seconds, he was inside
her guard. He tagged her thrice in the chest with an open palm, struck at
her elbows and forearms with the edges of his hands, and slapped her across
the face several times.

Motoko stood stock-still, staring, her sword limp in her hand. Her cheeks
burned red from the sting of the slaps. "You--you--"

"You wanna give up on this now, or what?" Ranma asked.

The kendoist's cheeks flamed even more brilliantly, and her eyes narrowed.
"I will not suffer such humiliation!" Abandoning all pretense of form and
style, she lashed out with a vicious stab at Ranma's groin.

"WHOA! Watch th' balls, Motoko!" Ranma shouted as he leapt away. "Y'call
that honourable?!"

"DO NOT LECTURE ME ABOUT HONOUR!" Motoko roared. "You are a craven,
honourless dog!" Again she struck out at him, the force of her attacks
cleaving the air with a deadly, venomous hiss. Ranma winced as several of
the pressure waves slipped past his guard, slicing his shirt to ribbons and
drawing more blood.

"Okay, so you ain't such a bad sparrin' partner after all," Ranma grunted,
putting some distance between himself and Motoko. "But didja hafta go an'
wreck th' shirt?" His red silk tang hung in tatters from his body. "I really
liked that shirt."

Motoko stared at him incredulously.

Suddenly, Ranma wasn't there anymore.

Motoko spun around warily. "What--"

SLAM.

The kendoist went flying; Ranma had gotten behind her somehow. She bounced
down the hill, nearly losing her grip on her sword. Ranma bounded down after
her.

"This is turnin' out t' be a fun date," he muttered, smirking.

=================================================

"Michaels...I'm still monitoring Ranma's vital signs, as well as those of
the girl."

"And?"

"The level of physical exertion has increased. Also, they seem to be headed
this way."

"Hmm. I think we might just be in for a show, buddy."

=================================================

Motoko skidded to a halt at the foot of the hill, nearly ploughing into the
rear wheel of LIMO-Z. Ranma landed lightly on top of the car, smirking down
at her with his arms crossed. "Yo, Motoko. You awake?"

The kendoist shuddered as she pushed herself to her knees, brushing dirt
from her face, eyes, and clothes. Her hakama was torn in places, and reddish
scrapes shone angrily on her hands, elbows, and exposed knees. She stood
shakily, steadied herself, and picked up her sword. Glaring up at Ranma, she
hissed, "You will pay for that." Tightening her grip on her sword, she
sprang into the air. "ZANSHOKEN!"

Ranma flipped over the rising sword thrust, wincing as the edge scraped
against the roof of LIMO-Z. "Hey, watch th' car, willya?"

"Don't worry, Ranma, my exterior shell is highly damage-resistant," LIMO-Z's
amplified voice sounded.

"Yeah? Well, she scratched th' paint."

"...she WHAT?"

"Yup. Big scratch, right there."

LIMO-Z's rear door suddenly opened violently as Motoko landed from her
attack, knocking her flat on her ass. She glowered at the car. "Tell your
servants not to interfere in our fight, Saotome!"

Ranma shrugged. "Hey, you scratched his paint. He's got a right t' be
pissed."

"Enough talk!" Motoko launched herself at Ranma once again, pressing the
same rapid attack pattern as earlier. Ranma used the Amaguriken to parry her
strikes, but the attack was far more vicious now; she was steadily pressing
him back up the hill. He tried to strike at her again as he had done before,
but she feinted, leaving him overextended...

"An opening!" Motoko cried. "ZANKUUSEN!"

A blinding flash emanated from her sword as it cleaved the air. Ranma had
leaned back to avoid the blow as best he could, but he'd definitely felt it;
his entire front now felt severely bruised. And his shirt--

"Dammit," Ranma sighed, shedding the remains of his tang in disgust.

Motoko stared at him as he dropped into a ready stance. A faint blush crept
up her cheeks.

"Err--Motoko?" Ranma waved a hand in front of her. "Yoo-hoo, Motoko! I ain't
gonna attack ya if you ain't ready."

Motoko blinked, flushed even more, and glared at him. "You dare expose
yourself to me?!"

"Hey, YOU cut up my shirt! Geez."

Thunder rumbled overhead. Ranma glanced up; stormclouds had gathered rather
suddenly. He sighed. "Perfect."

"Defend yourself!" Motoko shouted. "ZANGANKEN!"

Ranma easily dodged another wave of pressure strikes, wincing slightly as he
did so. *Wow, she musta hit deeper than I thought...* He sighed. "Okay. I
really hate t' do this ta a girl, but--"

Then he felt it. The first drop of rain.

"Aw, crap."

Another drop, then another...a slow, steady drizzle began to fall on the
hill, forming a fine sheet of mist in the air.

Motoko's eyes widened. "What--?"

Ranma leapt at her, kicking the sword out of her hands, then slammed a palm
strike directly into her breastbone, sending her sprawling. Motoko lay on
the damp grass on her rear, eyes wide, continuing to stare at Ranma, whose
bare breasts were now heaving.

"You done yet?" the redhead asked, glaring at the fallen kendoist.

Motoko sat up, trembling, still staring wide-eyed at the topless girl before
her. "S-Saotome? Wh-what manner of demon are you?"

"I ain't a demon!" Ranma snapped. "I just turn inta a girl when I get wet."

Motoko stood. "I...I see." She picked up her sword. Her head was bowed, her
bangs obscuring her eyes. Her shoulders trembled violently.

Ranma tensed, anticipating another attack.

A low sound issued from the kendoist, her shoulders shaking even more
furiously. Ranma peered at her in confusion, lowering his guard slightly.
"Motoko?"

Motoko suddenly threw back her head and let out a loud, raucous peal of
laughter.

Ranma gaped at her. "Uhh..."

The kendoist continued to laugh, clutching at her stomach as she did so.

"O-oi," the redhead muttered, becoming annoyed.

Motoko wiped a rain-soaked arm across her face, drawing in a long shuddering
breath. A strange smile quirked her lips; she stood fully upright with
effort and sheathed her sword. Still chuckling, she bowed to Ranma. "I
underestimated you, Saotome. You are a worthy opponent. I hope to challenge
you again someday."

"Err--"

The kendoist unbelted her gi, slipping it off her shoulders; her chest was
bound by heavy cloth bandages wrapped around most of her torso. She stepped
forward and handed the damp gi to Ranma. "It will likely not cover your
breasts fully, as they are rather large, but it will at least serve to
somewhat protect your modesty." Her lips twitched as she bowed once more. "I
concede the duel, Saotome Ranma, and I bid you good day." With that, she
strolled down the hill on the side opposite the parked limousine, her
chortles carrying on the soft breeze.

The rain stopped.

Ranma stared after her for a long moment, sighed heavily, slipped on the gi
(which only barely covered her nipples), and headed down to the car.

=================================================

"Who won?" Michaels asked as Ranma slid into the back seat of the car.

"You know?" the boy-turned-girl asked as she reached for the thermos of hot
water stored in the wet bar. "I ain't really sure."

=================================================

Half a kilometre away, Motoko paused, glancing back at the hill. An errant
breeze blew several loose strands of grass past her even as it plucked up
her long raven hair.

"Saotome Ranma. The strength and power of a man--yet with the delicate
beauty of a woman--"

She fell silent for a long moment. Then, she glanced down at herself. She
flushed brilliantly.

"We WILL meet again, Saotome," she muttered as she ran into a copse of trees
, arms crossed over her chest.

=================================================

RATE THIS DATE!

Your participation determines the outcome of the Ranmadate project! Vote for
the bridal candidate you like best!

Below is a date rating form. Fill it out and send it to
lurker@lurkerdrome.com; results will be tallied during the course of the
Ranmadate project. The individual date-rating forms and the final voting
form at the end of the thirty days will be used to determine the outcome,
and Ranma's future bride.

IMPORTANT NOTE: PLEASE make sure the subject line of your e-mail reads
"Ranmadate Voting Form", and that you specify which candidate the voting
form refers to. Also, please DO NOT post voting responses to the FFML! Also
refrain from posting them to my LiveJournal. If you do not comply with the
above, I'll ignore your vote.

0. BRIDAL CANDIDATE NAME: ______________________

1. COMPATIBILITY

On a scale of one to ten, rate this candidate's compatibility with Ranma.
(1-worst, 10-best)

2. SUCCESS OF DATE

On a scale of one to ten, judge how successful this date was for both
parties (cumulatively; please do not enter separate values for both Ranma
and the girl). (1-worst, 10-best)

3. SURVIVAL CHANCES

On a scale of one to ten, rate how likely:

--Ranma is to survive this candidate. (1-worst, 10-best)

--This candidate is to survive Ranma. (1-worst, 10-best)

--Ranma is to survive becoming part of this candidate's life. (1-worst,
10-best)

--This candidate is to survive becoming part of Ranma's life. (1-worst,
10-best)

4. OPINION POLL

Would you like to see Ranma marry this candidate?

(yes or no)

Votes will be collected until the end of the Ranmadate project. Thanks for
reading!

=================================================

END OF DAY 2 -- RANMADATE

=================================================


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