Ah, nice to hear from you again:

Never haning seen this anime, my reply will probably mostly consist of

writing

critisism.

I was the same way when I read Lurker's first Azumanga fic. Looking back on
it, I had no idea of half the things going on that I do now. I'm three
episodes plus one short 'movie' away from the end. Makes me want to sniffle,
since they'll be graduating soon.

Seated directly across from them, Osaka interjected herself into the
conversation, "My parents took me to a museum that had dinosaurs once. It
was on this island that you could only get to by flying. And it was all
outdoors, so you had to drive around, and you got to see all the

different

dinosaurs penned up in their natural environments. Only someone sabotaged
the main power generator, and the dinosaurs got out and started eating
everyone. It was very scary."

haha

Osaka is a bit flighty. Sometimes she gets... confused

Tomo punched Yomi in the solar plexus, instantly winding her and doubling
her over as she gasped for air.

man

Tomo tends to be overly direct in everything, and I do mean everything. On
the other hand, it works and distracts Yukari, though having seen the third
beach episode, she would only do this to help the others, since she thinks
Yukari drives great.


Actually, the similarities between Yukari and Tomo really become evident by
Tomo's senior year. I see now why Lurker drew so many parallels between
Yukari-Nyamo and Tomo-Yomi in his fic.

"My, you're certainly eager," the woman said happily. Her poise and

demeanor

shifted to a somewhat more authoritative one. "Now if you'll step this

way,

we'll start with the Hall of Rocks,

hahaha

It was the best name I could come up with. How many different ways can you
call an area that consists of rocks?

"No. I'm a teacher. I don't need to learn anything."

exactly

Believe me, that would exemplify Yukari' attitude.

"Hmph, trying to foist her responsibilities on me.

unless the guide is a woman, you might want to make 'her' into 'their'

She is. I mention her name and reference her as a woman several times.

"I was just making a joke," Tomo admitted. She then elbowed Kagura in the
ribs. "Did you hear that? I got a saying right."

haha

And given Tomo's track record, this is grounds for her being delighted.

Bewildered, Yomi said, "I somehow doubt that. You can't genetically alter
rocks, seeing as they have no genes."

again, i havent seen this anime, but am i to take they are all very young?
or did they get to the museum on the short bus?

Tomo's not very bright and prone to doing things before thinking them
through. The Spiderman parallel has drowned out everything else in her
hyperactive mind. Osaka's a bit of a ditz prone to day dreams and such, and
Kagura just isn't that good with homework, but is fairly practical about
other things. The others are farily bright, with Chiyo being a child
prodigy.

Sakaki's attention had been so riveted to the smaller skeleton that she

had

failed to notice a taller one behind it. She looked up and into the
ferocious jaws of what was obviously a dinosaur with very many, very

sharp,

teeth.

the mommy dinosaur

Heh. The real punchline here is that Sakaki loves all things cute,
fantasizes about them at the drop of a hat, and in real life tries to pet
stray cats frequently. However, whenever she tries to pet them, they bite
her hard, to the point at which her hands are frequently bandaged, though
she never gives up hope.It finally pays off when she takes her senior trip
to Okinawa. In this case, the idea of a raptor chomping on her hand is a bit
much.

A chorus of  "Yes" filled the air.

need punctuation after any word in quotation marks, unless you want to

make

them single quotes.

Will add the missing exclamation point.

"One hundred bottles of beer on the wall.
One hundred bottles of beer.
You take one down.
Pass it around.
Ninety-nine bottles of beer on the wall.
Ninety-nine bottles of beer on the wall."

add a space before the last line, as it starts a new verse, and id add an
elipsis too...

You're probably write about the line skip, however since I used the line
markers usually used for music lines to seperate scene headers, I ended up
just making it a large chunk of dialogue. I will definitely add the elipses,
as it reinforces the idea that this song is going to go on and on and on and
on...

^_^

No, really, it is the writer's notes, not an introduction to the next

scene.

A bit sillier than usual for the series, but hey, I thought it'd be good

for

a few laughs, and it's not like there's a lot of Azumanga fics out there

to

compete with (though I'd really like for there to be.) Typical ending

with

no real point to it or deeper meaning. Just some basic silliness. Thanks

for

reading, and hope you enjoyed it at least a little.

I did, makes me want to watch the series.

It's a cute little humor series. It's not serious in the slightest, and
there is no overall plot. It details the life and times of a group of
(mostly) oddballs girls in high school from their sophmore year through
graduation. If it wasn't for them moving through the grades year by year
(thus indicating that events are moving forward and the series will reach a
resolution.) it would be the equivalent of Seinfeld in that it would be an
anime about nothing, just the characters antics (which carry it well, IMO).
They definitely work well together. and if you're in the mood for
lighthearted mindless entertainment, I recommened it.

Thanks for the help. It's really appreciated.

DB Sommer





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