Finally getting to this:

- - - - - - - - - -
At first it was the "same old, same old", ya know?  Not that Yuri
'n I'd had much in the way of missions in that part of the galaxy,
but otherwise the story seemed very familiar.  Mysterious
creature destroying everything and creating havok, yawn.

Hmm. So who is this, I wonder.

So Gooley gave us the planet's coordinates and we headed out,
figuring we could pick up anything else we needed to know by
watching the news while in flight.  So we get within range, and
the news starts covering the failures of other teams who've gone
in to try to stop the destruction.  Yuri and I look at each other,
puzzled, but she figures it out.  The planet where all this is
going on is part of the Jurai Empire, and every amateur team of
"Soldiers of Love and Justice" in that part of the Empire was
apparently headed for Epsilonsis IV.  Real bozo system they've
got there.

Yuri and I watched this one team, caught live in action...

Heh. Wonder if it's a Dirty Pair reference.

Three large mechas, red, green, and blue, stood poised to fight.
An amplified voice, high-pitched, caroled out over the battlefield.

"Foul creature!  We, the Magic Knights, will stop you!  I am
Rayearth!"  The voice apparently came from the red mech.

The newsguy's voice-over came simultaneously with a floating
hypertag:  "Lady Hikaru of House Shidou, 2nd degree hereditary
military nobility, fiancee of Prince Masaki Youshou Jurai."

Heh. Still hanging on to that dubious title of 'fiancee'

In obviously well-practiced unison, the three called out, "In the
cause of Love and Justice, we will defeat you!"

I think they need a few more levels. :)

- - - - - - - - - -
Well, they didn't; the monster proceeded to plow through all
three, apparently impervious to anything they

Specify some of the futile attacks. "Plasma balls, energy shots, and I think
the green one even broke wind on it or something. None of it worked.' :)

"Really, Kei.  This is just perfect for us; how can the situation
possibly get any worse?"

The age  old saying you never say.

Nodding decisively, Tenchi stealthily crept down the length of the
bed and over its foot, then smoothed his pajamas before leaving
his room.

He glanced into Mihoshi's and Kiyone's room.  Kiyone was staring
at herself in the mirror, horrorstruck.  Her hair had been cut
quite short.  It now bore a part straight down the middle and was
brushed straight over to each side, falling just short of covering
her ears.

blech.

Tenchi did a rapid cost/benefits calculation, then agreed with
Mihoshi.

smart boy.

- - - - - - - - - -
Tenchi descended the stairs to the living room, still conversing
with Kiyone and Mihoshi about Kiyone's hair.  He paused as he
noticed somebody new sitting on the sofa in the living room.

"Oh, Tenchi!" shouted Sasami gleefully.  "Grandma, this is Tenchi,
our fiance!  Tenchi, this is Aeka's and my grandmother, Kamiki
Seto Jurai."

Heh. Seen GPX, have you?

Tenchi bowed appropriately, and finished his descent of the
stairs, studying Seto.  He saw little resemblance to Aeka or
Sasami, although the relationship to Misaki was obvious.  Seto
looked like a more mature version of Misaki, but with a slight
greenish tinge to her hair color.  Instead of the innocent
mischief which Sasami's and Misaki's smiles sometimes displayed,
Seto's smile seemed downright Machiavellian.

Indeed.

"Of course I cut your hair, dear," explained Seto, putting one arm
around Kiyone and one around Sasami.  "Now you look much like
Sasami's old nanny.  I think it'll make Sasami feel more
comfortable in this alien environment."

Hmm. That seems a bit too direct, even for her. Still, I haven't seen the
last 9 eps yet, so she might have done something like that.

"And is that all, grandmother?"

Grandmother?

"...who keeps trying to hide us whenever he has visitors to the
shrine," Umi muttered darkly.  "And he always acts embarrassed
that we exist, and he keeps making 'secret' interstellar calls to
beg someone named 'Airi' for help..."

Heh.

Aeka turned to stare frostily at Kiyone.  "I'll have you know that
the polls give much higher popularity ratings to the average
Juraian Licensed Soldier of Justice than to the average GP
officer!"

I have a feeling Soldiers of Love and Justice don't do non flashy things,
like walk a beat or pull over speeders. That makes all the difference in the
world. :)

Edward, who was typing on her own laptop, chimed in,  chanting,
with a big grin, "Rivals with a rep so bad, who could make my
pals so mad?"  Then, in a more normal voice, she added, turning
to face Mihoshi and Kiyone, "The Galaxy Welfare Association is
coming instead."

heh

"Epsilonsis IV?  Was COLONIZED?  What idiot did that?  I built
that planet to be a trash heap for my most dangerous experiments!"
Washuu grabbed two fistfuls of her hair and looked as though she
were about to tear them out.

Hehehehe. She needed to stick them in a sun or something.

"Anyway, as I said, there are thirteen of those things running
around.  They all have the same forcefield, but different shapes
and abilities.  I called them 'Angels'.

Heh. Another cute xover reference.

  > - - - - - - - - - -

Yuri 'n I were both surprised by how easy it had been to enter
Juraian space.  We'd been denied entry in the past (with some
rather unflattering comments).  But this time, approval came very
quickly, apparently expedited by someone named 'Kamiki Seto
Jurai'.  Yuri looked her up, and found that she, like us, had
somehow acquired an uncomplimentary sobriquet:  'Demon Princess'.
No doubt she sympathized with the difficulties Yuri and I
sometimes run into because of that horrible name people keep
applying to us.

Or wants some competition to the name eliminated.

- - - - - - - - - -
   The usual cloudy background appeared.  A huge cube
   appeared in the sky, to be cut in half by a bare-chested,
   muscular hero who came out of nowhere, swinging a sword
   of pure light.  His teeth glinted in the sunshine as he
   smiled.  Other scenes followed in quick succession, the same,
   incredibly handsome figure slicing another dozen quickly-
   glimpsed shapes in two.

- - - - - - - - - -
"Mine," I heard Yuri whisper, even as my own lips shaped the same
word.

heh

We came back to ourselves only to see that the so-called 'Love
Angels' had taken advantage of our momentary precog trance

ah, using that angle. It was rarely touched on in the anime, as I recall.

armed and trained for that purpose.  There are many other,
similar galaxy-wide organizations established by the Galactic
Union:  the Galaxy Library Institute, for instance,

ROD equivelant?

"But things seem to happen around them a lot," Mihoshi added
solemnly, nodding wisely.

Everyone else present paused to give her a long look.

Kiyone: Worse things, she means.

"Ed checked the twenty closest," the urchin chortled as she spun a
slow circle in mid-air.  "All have at least one member descended
from him."

Perhaps it's something in his blood which spawns them. :)

"On this pleasant planet, on this nice spring day, the warm
sunshine should be raising one's spirits.  However, you have
depressed the spirits of the people by devastating their cities
and killing them by the hundreds of thousands.  This has made me,
the Angel of Love, Wedding Peach, become mildly upset with you!"

never saw that one.

I turned to Yuri.  "You've gotta be kidding me.  They only have
them on one leg.  Wouldn't that make flying incredibly awkward?
And wouldn't thrusters that small have, like, a significant
chance of exploding any given time you used them?"

Yuri replied, "I don't see how they couldn't.  Of course, this is
Juraian tech; maybe theirs are safer.  Still, what's wrong with a
standard flightpack?"

garter is much smaller and inconspicuous?

Yuri and I looked at each other.  "What now?" we asked
simultaneously.  We both shrugged, then looked back at the battle
to see how the bimbos were doing.  They continued to fly around
the monster like gnats, shooting it with beams from their hands,
to no effect.  It didn't look like the monster even noticed them.

gotta go for its core.

"No!  It's too strong!  It'll kill you," I heard Yuri whisper, and
made a mental note to myself that I'd have to move quick to beat
Yuri to this guy.

heh. They are the last thing in the world Tenchi needs.

This short, red-headed girl seemed surprised when Mughi walked out
from behind us.  "A coerl.  You keep a coerl as a pet.

not familiar with the name.

Are the

two of you completely insane?"  She asked impertinently, waving a
small sensor device in Yuri's face.  "They feed on phosphorus
taken directly from living tissue."

"Oh, izzat what that stuff is?" I asked, surprised.  I glanced at
Yuri; she shrugged.  "We just order his food from central supply."

Mughi growled briefly at the red-haired twit.

heh

"I can see where such a course of action might occur to you,"
Youshou admitted, pursing his lips in consideration.

Shouldn't she be running this by Funaho or something?

"I see." Aeka said, testily.  "I will refrain from asking whether
your personal situation has any bearing on your advice.  Please
ask the relevant ladies to join this call, and I will issue their
charge.  And if you wish to send the other pair to this planet as
well, I am sure we can find some use for them."

Youshou nodded, pleased, then stepped away from the screen and
called out the door of his office back at the Masaki Shrine on
Earth.  A few moments later, the faces of Sutingurei Shiria,
Daitokuji Pikko, Amberudon Teruzi, and Haafusaaku Menori, four
of Youshou's official fiancees, filled the screen.

Heh. Who made them 'official'?

At the bottom, just as Washuu had said, an entrance to the side
led into an enormous cavern.  Our steps, quiet as they were,
echoed eerily in the silence.  In the dim light, we could just
make out a number of large, indefinite shapes.  I could hear
detective Mihoshi whimpering behind me.  I hoped she was pointing
her blaster somewhere else.

heh

"They've never had one, single mission go right in their entire
careers, except for the one where Mihoshi and I met them."

heh. They canceled each other out.

"You just left those things disabled down there?" Asuka asked
Washuu.  "Can you make mecha out of them?  I've always wanted my
own mecha.  Bright red, to fit my personality!  C'mon, Wonder
Girl, let's go pick up some mecha of our own!"

heh

I signalled Yuri and we both headed for the bathroom.  Once away
from the table, I hissed, "Yuri, this guy is the pits.  He hasn't
even glanced my way for fifteen minutes now.  And the
competition's too much.  Our job's over; let's just take off."

"Kei, what are you talking about?  He's cute!  And he's looked MY
way twice in the last five minutes.  Let's stick around, at least
until they all leave or something.  We aren't in any hurry."

heh

Our communicators buzzed.  It was our boss Gooley, natch.  And
what did he want?  He ORDERED us to stay with this polygamous
prince and his sap brides-to-be.  He showed us the pile of
petitions on his desk, begging us to spend the rest of our lives
with them.

hehehehe. That's one way of forcing them to stick around.

- - - - - - - - - -
THE END (for now).


Notes:
  Why the first-person, told by Kei?  Because that's the way
  Haruka Takachiho always wrote his novels.  Mughi really is
  a Van Vogt coerl in the original, too; that's one respect in
  which the American manga is closer to the original than the
  anime was.

  And what was up with Seto and Kiyone?  Well, the release of
  GXP and its revelations puts me in a bind, since I'd already
  added Kiyone to this cast.  Who could have guessed that
  Kajishima would decline to add Kiyone in OAV III, but instead
  introduce a different green-haired former partner of Mihoshi's?
  I decided I'd try to stay as close as possible to the OAVs,
  which means changes for Kiyone.

that's fine. I don't see any one complaining about it. BEsides, as I recall,
the Mihoshi special was supposed to be set in the OVAverse, which means
Kiyone should be alive.

Nice work. I was amused by it. Centered more on the DP than Tenchi, but it's
a nice diversion.

DB Sommer



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