Yep. We're doing this one again, and like so many things, this chapter grew
on me. One day I shall learn to write shorter chapters



The Things We Wish For...
Chapter 8

Any and all C+C is appreciated. You can contact me at
sommer@3rdm.net

All of my fics are stored at the following:

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Standard Disclaimer: I don't own the rights to any of the Ranma 1/2
characters. They belong to Takahashi and whomever she sold the rights to.

[Writer's note: I ordinarily don't like to do this, but I don't believe this
chapter is quite as good as the one before, but it accomplishes what I want
and need to do. Hopefully you'll enjoy it anyway.]

Preface: What's happened before: Akane got her hands on a wish and used it
to wish her mother had never been in a car accident and was alive in the
present. Well, her mother wasn't in an accident and is with them in the
present. There's only a slight complication; Kachiko had been in two
accidents, the first occurring when she was the ripe old age of seventeen...

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Emerging from the rear door of her home, Kachiko Tendou had a noticeable
spring in her step as she hummed to herself and entered the backyard. The
day was exceptionally bright and sunny, with hardly a cloud in the sky. It
was perfect weather for engaging in an activity she had never been permitted
to do by her parents: Sunbathing. The conservative couple had been adamant
about the improprieties of showing so much skin, and held the opinion men
wanted women to look like pale ghosts. Of course, they also held the opinion
women should be meek little mice that should be seen and not heard, and
whose sole dual purposes were taking care of their husbands and ushering in
the next generation of children. No other extraneous thoughts need enter a
woman's head. Such a lifestyle might have suited her mother, but not Kachiko
Tendou. She was destined for better, and infinitely more interesting,
things. On the sly she had managed to work a decent tan the few times she
went on trips to the seashore with Sakura, but those had been far in the
past (really far in the past, once Kachiko thought about it), and taking one
look into the mirror made the time-lost girl grimace in distaste. Steps had
to be taken immediately to rectify the problem.

Originally, Kachiko had planned on borrowing something from Akane, but the
few swimsuits Akane owned had way too much material. The girl didn't own a
single two piece. That meant heading to the local shopping mall to pick up
some suitable swimwear. The trip had been most enlightening. Times had
changed, as evidenced by the fact that what Kachiko had assumed was material
to make bikinis, turned out to be bikinis themselves. The items were so
small they practically weren't there, which made them perfect.

Kachiko refrained from buying what was termed a thong. It wasn't that she
considered it too revealing, just that her attempt to wear one proved that
walking around with a string running in between her buttocks was a decidedly
uncomfortable experience. So she settled on something small, that bordered
on scandalous, if not a touch on the other side.

"And it just might attract Ranma's attention," Kachiko told herself. That
was the other reason for taking the time out to tan in the backyard. The
poor boy was far too restrained for his own good. One look at Kachiko
though, and he couldn't help from loosening up at least a little. She knew
Tachi-chan would go through the roof if he saw her in such revealing garb,
though he didn't really need much in the way of prodding to be open about
his feelings. Usually coming into his line of sight was enough. One thing
Kunou had over Ranma was the ability to make a girl feel appreciated.

Kachiko spread out the towel across the grass and smeared tanning lotion on
her body. Ranma was supposedly due back from wherever he had gone before too
long. That should give her enough time to gain at least a little color, and
make it seem as though she was lying inconspicuously in the yard, and that
putting herself on display for his benefit was merely a coincidence.

Kachiko had been laying out on her back for no more than fifteen minutes
before she heard the door to the house slide open. She rose up and shielded
her eyes from the glare, squinting and trying to make out who had emerged.
"I should have brought sunglasses," she mumbled as her eyes failed to
refocus from the bright glare that had narrowed her irises to almost
nothing.

"Hey, Kachi," the familiar voice of Nabiki said.

Her eyes finally adjusting to the light, Kachiko could see that Nabiki had
come outside. She carried a sizable basket on her arm and was wearing a two
piece bikini that, while in no way conservative, contained about twice the
material Kachiko's did. Of course Nabiki did have more to conceal, Kachiko
noted with distaste.

"I saw you laying out, and decided to join you," Nabiki said cheerily as she
put down the basket. She pulled a towel from the top and laid it out next to
Kachiko. She then pulled out a radio, and sat it down between them. She
grabbed the bottle of lotion Kachiko had left out and proceeded to lather
herself up.

"How delightful," Kachiko managed without a hint of sincerity. Better
company she would have preferred. Actually she would have preferred no
company at all compared to Nabiki's presence. Competition she did not need.
But without some pretext to force her middle 'daughter' to leave, she'd have
to tolerate the annoying pest.

Nabiki finished lotioning in silence. She then lay on her back, just as
Kachiko was, and let out a loud sigh. "It sure is nice out."

"Uh," Kachiko grunted, trying to kill any attempt at conversation before it
could begin.

Nabiki seemed content to leave things at that. However, after a few minutes,
she turned to Kachiko and said, "Mind if I listen to some music?"

If it'll get you to leave me alone, Kachiko barely refrained from saying.
Instead she got out a neutral, "Sure."

Nabiki leaned over and pushed a button on the CD player. Instantly, a song
began to play:

~I must!
~I must!
~I must increase my bust!
~I must!
~I must!
~I must increase my bust!

Nabiki smiled evilly at Kachiko, whose entire body jerked as the first
chorus ended. Some of Nabiki's amusement disappeared when she heard the
muscles in Kachiko's neck, tensed beyond all measure, actually groaned in
protest as her head slowly, inexorably turned in Nabiki's direction. Further
amusement died as she saw the rictus smile plastered across Kachiko's
features, and the fact her eyes were now shot through with red, almost to
the point where it was painful to look upon.

"It's a bit loud," Kachiko said, smile not faltering in the slightest. "I'm
going to turn it down." She picked up the radio, and brought it down over
the top of her head, rending plastic and wires as she shattered it in two.
As though she had done nothing more than adjust a dial, she carefully set
the two pieces down, as if they were delicate pieces of china. "That's
better," she informed Nabiki, Kachiko's smile now somewhat back to normal.

That hadn't worked out quite as she planned. Nabiki decided to cut her
losses and lay back so that she could work on her tan.

Had Kachiko been a dog, she would have been frothing at the mouth in an
effort to come up with some means of retaliation for that not so subtle jab,
which was actually a slap in the face. There was no way such a conniving
girl could ever be her daughter. And her chest was too big to be her
offspring. Children weren't supposed to one up their parents, Kachiko
excluded from the rule, naturally.

The first edges of a plan involving hamsters, grease, and duct tape, had
just started to form when Kachiko heard the door to the house slide open.
Her eyes had once again shifted to the huge amount of light and was forced
to squint to see who had appeared. Kachiko could just make out the outline
of a young man with tousled hair coming through the doorway. The figure, who
could only be one person, gave a hesitant, "Ah," and scratched his head.

Kachiko was up in an instant, vaulting into a handspring and hurling herself
through the air towards Ranma. She would prove to Nabiki she had a desirable
body and that men weren't only interested in big chests.

"Oops!" Kachiko cried out, pretending to stumble forward into Ranma. She
then 'slipped' her hands around his neck, forcing his head down and into her
chest.

"It's so nice to see you, Ranma," she cooed, keeping his head snuggled
firmly between her breasts.

There was a loud, "Ack!" and Kachiko felt Ranma suddenly go limp in her
arms, forcing her to support him. Something wet then started to trickle down
her chest.

"What the heck?" Kachiko said, and pulled Ranma's head away.

Her eyes finally having a chance to adjust to the light, Kachiko saw that
the figure whom she had assumed to be Ranma was nothing of the kind. It was
somebody Ranma's age, with approximately the same color hair, height, and
weight, which explained the confusion. The most notable thing about him was
the yellow bandanna with black stripes wrapped around his forehead.
Currently he was unconscious, a huge gout of blood trickling from his nose,
that was the source of the wet substance Kachiko had felt on her stomach.

"Ahh! This isn't Ranma! It's some pervert!" She dropped the boy she had been
supporting like a rock, allowing his head to thump loudly to the ground.

Nabiki looked over the scene with an amused grin. "Not quite. His name is
Ryouga. He drops by sometimes. He's someone that hangs around Ranma. They're
sort of friends in the same sense you and that Wakaba girl were."

That made Kachiko relax. That meant he was one of Ranma's best friends in
the whole world, and probably not a pervert that had tried for a cheap
thrill by impersonating Ranma and receiving some 'special treatment' from
her. "He's injured." She pointed at the blood.

Nabiki shook her head. "He tends to pass out at the sight of a little female
flesh."

Kachiko reconsidered him. "Oh, so he's a weenie boy." She shook her head
distastefully. While she didn't like her men lecherous, like Icky
Slutzensin, she didn't care for weenie boys that passed out at the sight of
a little skin either. She wanted someone between the two extremes.

Since Ryouga's life wasn't in any danger, and seeing she had some blood
decorating her chest, she removed the fallen boy's bandanna and used it to
wipe off the blood.

As her attention was riveted to wiping her body, Soun emerged from the
house. "Is everything all right? I thought I heard a..." his voice trailed
off as he espied his wife, standing in a swimsuit far smaller than he had
ever seen her wear before. The sight of seeing someone he had been married
to for so many years in such a revealing in garb, in better shape than she
had been when they were married, combined with over ten years of abstinence,
had an odd effect upon him. His mind seem to shut down, as more basic
instincts took over. His eyes took on a vacant stare, drool trickled down
his chin, and he raised his arms up and began to walk slowly forward.
"Kachiiii."

Turning from her cleaning, Kachiko noticed him from the first time. She
screeched, "AHHH! The old guy's been turned into a zombie!" and proceeded to
level a hard kick right into him, punting him well over the wall and out of
sight.

Nabiki made a clucking noise with her tongue. "Geez, Kachi, you aren't ever
happy, are you? You dress in next to nothing to get guys' attention, then
complain when you get it."

"I don't want creepy old guys going for a grope or weenie boys bleeding on
me," Kachiko explained. Her eyes took on a sinister glint. "Sounds to me
like you're jealous that they're going after me instead of you."

Nabiki's eyebrow twitched. "You have got to be kidding. I am way more
attractive, and have a much better body, than you." Nabiki thrust out her
chest.

Kachiko's eyebrow twitched back in annoyance. "Yes, but looks only take you
so far, especially when attitude can scare guys away. It's not like you've
had a lot of men dropping by asking for you, now is it?"

"I have been on plenty of dates!" Nabiki shot back.

Sensing blood in the water, Kachiko pressed forward. "But how many of them
have gone out with you more than once? I bet you hit them up for every cent
you can milk out of them and don't give anything in return, other than a
cold shoulder."

Nabiki growled slightly.

Kachiko taunted, "I heard someone the other day say getting to first base
with Nabiki means she doesn't lunge for your wallet in the first hour."

"At least I don't hit on engaged men or deluded jerks!" Nabiki shot back.

Kachiko snorted. "Ranma obviously isn't comfortable with this whole
engagement thing or he wouldn't have agreed to postponing it so quickly. And
if you don't appreciate a guy like Tachi-chan, then you're an even greater
lost cause than I thought."

"At least I have some pride and don't throw myself at guys and hop into the
sack with them like some slut!"

It was Kachiko's turn to become angry. "I'll have you know I've never let a
guy get farther than second base, and only one even made it that far! But
even so, I'd rather be known as a slut than some frigid bitch!"

Nabiki walked forward until she was right next to Kachiko. "What did you
call me?!"

Kachiko shivered. "It's suddenly so cold my nipples are hard enough to cut
glass." She fingered her top to emphasize the point.

Nabiki was in a state she had rarely fallen into the last few years; one of
trembling anger. "You're really asking for it!"

Kachiko quaked in mock fear. "Oh no, you're going to run some kind of
simple-minded scam on me, aren't you? Woe is me. Whatever shall I do in the
face of such terror?"

Nabiki snarled at Kachiko, who didn't back off an inch and met her
eye-to-eye. Lightning seemed to dance between their baleful glares as they
squared off with one another.

xxxxxxxxxxxxx

Inside the house, Kasumi turned from the cupboard she was cleaning and
thought she heard the sounds of someone arguing in the backyard. What was
curious was that the usual cause of such disruptions, Ranma or Akane, were
both out. She hoped it wasn't something her father had done to her mother.
Kasumi kept telling him to take things slowly, but far too often he seemed
to lose control in Kachiko's presence and wasn't making any progress at all.
Kasumi had tried coming up with a plan to bring them closer together, but
nothing came to mind. If only someone would kidnap Kachiko, then her father
could rescue her, just like Ranma did with Akane on several occasions, and
then they could grow closer to one another.

Kasumi was pondering who might be interested in abducting her mother when
there was a knock at the front door. Her train of thought lost, she went to
the door and opened it.

Pantyhose Tarou waved pleasantly at her. "Hey there. How are you doing?
You're Akane's sister, Kasumi, right?"

"Why yes, I am," Kasumi bowed. "Can I help you?"

"I'm looking for Ranma. I need to beat the shit out of him before tomorrow.
Is he around?"

"I'm afraid not," Kasumi was taken a bit aback by both the youth's rough
demeanor and his stated intentions. Although curiously he didn't seem angry.
Just very businesslike.

"I'll wait for him to come back," Tarou said, allowing himself inside and
looking around, obviously searching for someone. "I'll stay out of your
way."

"Um, sure. I suppose so," Kasumi said. He was a bit on the rude side, but
perhaps whatever reason he wanted to beat Ranma up for was important.

Tarou's ears perked up at the sounds of an argument coming from outside. He
immediately headed towards the noise. Within moments he had navigated his
way through the house and out to the backyard.

He smiled as he spotted the two girls snarling and staring daggers at one
another. Out loud, he said, "Sweet, a catfight with girls in bikinis. Don't
let me interrupt you. My money's on you, Akane."

Both heads turned to the source of the disturbance. Kachiko's anger
momentarily abated, and her eyes took on a more evaluative glare. "Who's
this?"

Nabiki backed away slightly, allowing her mother to stand between her and
Tarou. Quietly, she said, "His name is Pantyhose Tarou. He's a pain in the
ass like you. Whenever he shows up, trouble follows." And he was one of the
few people Nabiki regarded as actually being dangerous. Kachiko was just an
annoyance that got under the skin (and cost a fair bit of money). Tarou was
far was worse than that, if the others' descriptions were the least bit
accurate. He had a fairly devious mind and a lot of power he was unafraid to
use to get what he wanted.

"What's he doing here?" Kachiko asked.

"I don't know, but it can't be for anything good." Nabiki admitted. "And if
he's smiling, that means it's almost certainly something bad for everyone
else."

Kachiko scowled at the youth. She sensed a great deal of power from him,
almost equal to Ranma's, whatever difference between them being negligible.
Also, she didn't like the looks of him either. He exuded an aura of danger.
Nabiki's change in demeanor and cautions felt merited rather than the
warning being some scheme she used to play with Kachiko's mind

Kachiko walked forward. Tarou gave an appreciative whistle. "Looking good
there, Akane. Not the sort of thing I ever thought I'd see you wear. Say,
did you change your hair? You look different."

"My name is Kachiko, not Akane," she said as she walked forward until she
was next to Tarou.

Tarou nodded his head in understanding. "I see now. Yeah, you do look
different from her. Family relation?"

"Sort of," she said. "What brings you here, Mr. Pantyhose?"

He flinched at hearing his name aloud. "It's just Tarou. Anyway, I dropped
by to kick Ranma's butt. It's not personal, this time. I just need to make
sure he's out of the way for the next day or two. He due back soon?"

Kachiko looked over Tarou's shoulder and said, "Good timing. There he is
now."

"What?!" Tarou spun on his heel, rapidly tensing up in order to fight Ranma.
Only when he turned around, he saw no one. "Where did he go?"

A foot came up from behind and found its way between Tarou's legs. He howled
in pain, and doubled over in agony.

Kachiko grabbed him by the back of his shirt and heaved him into the koi
pond, his wincing form making a loud splash. She said to the pond. "That's
what you get for trying to ambush up my Ranma." She slapped her hands
together, and gave a satisfied grin to Nabiki. "That takes care of that."

There was a loud eruption from the pond as water flew everywhere and an
inhuman roar reverberated throughout the neighborhood, making Kachiko's hair
stand on end. Reluctantly, she turned around, immediately wincing at the
monstrosity that was now standing in the pond.

"Oops. I didn't see that one coming," Kachiko admitted as the cursed form of
Pantyhose Tarou ominously began making its way to her.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Ranma wasn't in the Tendou home for more than minute before he sensed
something amiss. He entered the living room and spotted Nabiki watching the
television. Everything appeared all right on the surface, but there was
definitely something lingering in the air. Something not right.

She waved to Ranma. "Tarou came by to cause some trouble. Kachi tried to
take him out first. Big mistake."

The name of Pantyhose always came attached with bad news. That he was
specifically trying to find Ranma made it infinitely worse. "What? Where is
she?"

Nabiki pointed up at the ceiling. "In her bedroom. Kasumi's taking care of
her. He didn't rough her up too bad. I think she caught him on a good day,
despite the shot to the nuts. Well, that and the fact her top got ripped off
after his first couple of punches. I think seeing her like that distracted
him. Not that she had much to distract him with," she added acidly.

Ranma was upstairs in an instant. He rushed into what had formerly been
Akane's room and saw Kasumi sitting on a chair next to the bed staring
mournfully at it. On the bed was a human-sized lump under the covers. He
couldn't see who it was as a second, smaller sheet was completely over its
head, reminiscent of a funeral shroud.

Ranma's eyes widened. Nabiki had said it wasn't bad. How could she have been
so wrong? He shouted, "Kachi!" and lunged into the room.

A cry of alarm came from beneath the shroud. "Ahhh! Don't come in here,
Ranma! I don't want you to see me like this!"

Ranma stopped dead in his tracks at the 'body' screeching and wriggling
around. "What's going on?"

The concealed Kachiko sat up, keeping the sheet over her head and wrapping
the blanket around her torso. "No, I won't let you see me." She jumped out
of bed, hands still over sheet and blanket, and ran for the doorway. She
missed it by a good three feet as she instead slammed hard into the wall
next to the door, and bounced off.

"I could have sworn there was a door there," Kachiko said, before loosening
her hold on the sheets and slumping to her butt on the floor.

Ranma moved forward to make sure she was all right. As the covers fell away,
he received a look at what Kachiko had been hiding under the smaller sheet.
"Wow, that's a pretty good shiner you have there."

The statement shook Kachiko back into the real world. She clutched at her
face in horror, then grabbed the fallen sheet with both hands and held it
over her head. "Wah! Ranma's seen how ugly I am! Now he'll never want to go
out with me!"

"Ah, it's only a black eye," Ranma said, completely failing to understand
what was going on.

"It's a horrifying disfigurement!" Kachiko cried.

"It's just a black eye," Ranma insisted.

At that point, Kasumi said, "Ranma, I don't think you should really be
staring at mother's breasts like that."

"What?" Ranma started to ask, then realized that at the same time the sheet
had fallen from Kachiko's face, the blanket wrapped around her body had also
fallen away. Unlike her 'shroud', Kachiko had failed to pick that one up
again. He hadn't even realized what had happened because the black eye had
caught his attention first.

Ranma covered his eyes. "I'm not looking at her chest!"

Beneath the cloth, Kachiko cried out, "See? He thinks I'm so repulsive he
won't even look at my body! Wah!"

"That's not it!" Ranma assured her. "Look, you're overreacting. Black eyes
go away."

Refusing to be comforted, Kachiko cried out, "Every time you look at me from
now on, you'll only picture me with this horrifying disfigurement and you'll
be repulsed by the very sight of me!"

Ranma shook his head sadly. "Believe me, if I can look at Akane sprouting
whiskers and not be repulsed by the sight, a black eye ain't nothing."

Kachiko's sniffling subsided. "Akane had whiskers? Her harelip problem must
be way worse than mine."

"Cat's whiskers," Ranma clarified. "It was a side-effect from some super
soba she ate."

The sheet fell away from Kachiko's face. "Wow! She must have looked like a
real freak. Do you have any pictures?"

Ranma said, "Ah, no. It wasn't the sort of thing Akane wanted saved for
posterity."

Now recovered from her emotional turmoil in record time, Kachiko rewrapped
the blanket around her body. "You can look now," she said.

Ranma peeked through the fingers covering his eyes, saw Kachiko was indeed
telling the truth, and removed his hands altogether. "Now what's this about
Pantyhose coming by and beating you up?"

Kachiko said, "Actually, he came by to beat you up. I couldn't let him do
that, so I tried my best to take him out before he could attack you."

"You shouldn't have done that!" Ranma said with more than a touch of anger.
"I can take care of myself. Tarou's dangerous."

Kachiko looked aghast at the idea. "You couldn't expect me to stand idly by
while he laid in ambush, waiting to beat you up."

"He could have hurt you," Ranma protested.

"I can take care of myself, and I'm responsible for my own actions. If I
want to leap to your defense, I'm going to do it no matter what you say. You
don't like it; I don't care. I'll do it anyway. " Kachiko stated firmly,
crossing her arms defiantly under the bed sheet wrapped around her torso.

Ranma wanted to argue further, but let it go. He sensed any attempt to
change her mind would be a long and drawn out battle that he didn't feel up
to, given how guilty he felt about her getting a black eye for his sake.
Besides, no matter how often he tried, he never seemed to be able to change
any female's mind. He had tried it often with lots of different women and
never once been satisfied with the results.

Kachiko continued. "I was winning too, only that rat had another one of
those curse things and tricked me into throwing him into the pond. After
that, well, he doesn't suck when he's that big, let me tell you. What did
you that would make him want to beat you up?"

Ranma shrugged. "I haven't seen him since the big fight with Rouge. I can't
come up with a reason why. Of course, this is Pantyhose we're talking about,
and he's not exactly the most peaceful guy around. If he thinks beating me
up is in his best interest, he wouldn't hesitate to do it." Ranma placed his
hand to his chin in thought. "But for the life of me I can't figure out why
he'd want to."

"I might be able to answer that," Nabiki said, producing a small poster,
about the same size as the CLAP hung everywhere to identify 'perverts'.
"Pantyhose dropped it when Kachi tossed him into the pond." She handed it to
Ranma.

He read it. "It says here there's a race tomorrow outside of Nerima. Some
sort of obstacle course thing. Aw, they have an entry fee for it. Why would
I want to pay to go through some obstacle course? My life is already full of
lots of obstacles and I don't have to pay for any of them."

"Read all the way to the bottom," Nabiki said in a tired voice.

Ranma did so. "Third Prize is a slap to the face. Second Prize is a month's
supply of Rice O'Roni. First Prize is... a ring that can control curses?!"

Kachiko eagerly said, "Ohhh. Rice O'Roni. It's a treat even outside of San
Francisco. Sign me up!"

"I have to have it!" Ranma shouted.

"I didn't know Ranma was so big on rice," Kachiko whispered to Kasumi.

"I think he's more concerned about the curse controlling ring," Kasumi
pointed out.

"Oh. Well, it's not like I have a curse, so after I win, he's more than
welcome to..." Kachiko trailed off as an errant thought occurred to her. If
she won the contest, and gave the curse control ring to Ranma, then he'd owe
her one. She might even be able to get a date out of him. But it would mean
giving up the Rice O'Roni. Matters of the heart or matters of the stomach;
which was more important?

It was more likely she could acquire money to purchase an equivalent amount
of rice than find something else to get Ranma to agree to a date. To Ranma,
she said, "Don't worry. I'll win the race and get you that ring you want so
bad. Although don't think for one second that I'm proposing by giving you a
ring. I like taking things a wee bit slower than that."

"Yeah, right," Ranma scoffed. "I'm going to enter the race and win it."

Kachiko gave a laugh, one full of superiority. "Oh, poor, foolish Ranma.
I've been through so many obstacle courses, I'm known as the Queen of the
Obstacle Course."

"You made that up," Nabiki said flatly.

"Did not!" Kachiko shot back. She was too known as the Queen of the Obstacle
Course. Of course, she was the only one that actually used the title, but
that didn't mean she wasn't known as it. "Wakaba used to run me through them
all the time to help build up my reflexes. She had them all: Pit traps,
pendulums, flame throwers, land mines, piranha filled pools, ferocious
tigers, and even ravenous rabbits."

"Ravenous rabbits don't sound like much of an obstacle," Nabiki said.

"They are when there's five hundred of them and you've had a barrel full of
carrot-scented perfume dumped on you," Kachiko assured her.

The sound of footsteps hurrying toward the room came to everyone's ears.
Akane appeared a moment later. "Mom, I heard you were hurt. Ouch! That's a
pretty big black eye."

"Ranma said he loves me no matter what I look like," Kachiko said dreamily.

Akane shot Ranma a shocked, then angry glare.

Ranma let out a strangled noise and quickly blurted out more to Akane that
Kachiko, "I did not say that! I said your black eye would go away and it
wasn't anything to feel bad about."

"Sounds like a commitment to me," Kachiko said.

"Only to those that need to be committed," Nabiki added dryly.

Akane's eyebrow started to twitch madly when she spotted the paper in
Ranma's hand. A few words on it caught her attention, and deflected her
anger. "What's this?" she asked, pulling it out from his hands.

Her eyes pored over the text. Upon reading to the bottom, a bright smile lit
up her features. "This is great, Ranma. If I win this race, you won't have
to worry about changing into a girl against your will."

"Actually, I'm going to be winning it," Ranma pointed out.

"I am," Kachiko corrected. "After all, I'm not known as the Queen of the
Obstacle Course for nothing."

"You made than up," Akane said flatly.

"I did not!" Kachiko insisted.

Kasumi patted Kachiko's head. "I believe you were called the Queen of the
Obstacle Course, Mother."

Kachiko pointed at Kasumi and said to Akane and Nabiki, "See? This is how a
proper daughter is supposed to act. You should believe everything your
mother tells you."

Bitterly, Nabiki snapped. "Right! Like when you told me our dog wasn't
around anymore because he got a new job in a junkyard and had to relocate to
Singapore?!"

Somewhat off guard by the accusation, Kachiko said, "I never told you that."

Hesitantly, Kasumi said, "Technically, you did. We used to have a family dog
about eleven years ago. His name was Akuma. He was sort of a mix of Irish
setter, golden retriever, boxer, and German pinscher."

"So he was a mutt?" Kachiko said.

"Well, that is a bit blunt, but accurate," Kasumi agreed. "He was a touch
ill-tempered."

"He was not! He was a sweet and lovable dog!" Nabiki insisted.

Akane entered the conversation. "He always snarled at me and treated me like
his personal chew toy. He was nearly twice as big as me and was terrifying.
I didn't like him at all."

Nabiki said, "He kept you from drowning in a river once."

"He was the one that chased me into it in the first place!" Akane snapped.
"And he didn't save me. He was running after me so hard that he didn't stop
in time and fell in, too. He was saving himself. I only got out because I
clung to his back." Akane shuddered at the memory. "It's one of the reasons
I don't like dogs. Pigs are much better as pets."

"Yeah, they never try to bite or chase you around," Ranma said
sarcastically.

Kasumi said, "Nabiki was the only one that he liked, and she got along with
him, too. They loved each other very much. The two would play with each
other for hours. But one day he was run over by a car. So instead of telling
Nabiki what really happened, you said that he got a new job."

"I called every junkyard in Singapore looking for him," Nabiki said, her
voice full of emotion. "There was over five hundred of them, by the way, and
I don't know how to speak Chinese."

"You and Father nearly had a heart attack over the phone bill," Kasumi
informed her mother.

Kachiko gave Nabiki a soft look. "I'm sorry. The next time you lose a pet, I
won't lie. I'll be sure to let you know he was turned into a roadpancake."

Kasumi looked at her mother askance, "Actually, that's exactly what you told
Akane and me. I was a little sad. Akane cheered."

"I absolutely hated that dog," Akane confirmed.

Kasumi told her mother, "Father said we probably shouldn't be so blunt with
Nabiki, saying something about your sense of humor traumatizing her enough
already, so you came up with that instead."

"I'm not surprised." Kachiko turned to Nabiki. "Given how much you whine now
about losing money, I can't imagine how much worse you were when you were
five."

"The point is you used to lie to us all the time," Nabiki said.

"Probably to teach you not to be gullible," Kachiko retorted. "Are you
gullible?"

Nabiki considered that. Slowly, she said, "No. Not really."

"Obviously it worked," Kachiko said satisfactorily.

"Horribly enough, I can actually picture you doing that," Nabiki said,
annoyed that Kachiko probably had just won the argument.

The entire conversation had passed by Ranma without a thought; he was off in
his own little world. "Just you wait. By tomorrow, I'll be rid of changing
into a girl." He left the room, singing and dancing to a personal tune of,
"Never gonna be a girl again. Never gonna be a girl again."

xxxxxxxxxx

The hour was getting late as Ranma prepared to head to his room to catch
some sleep., Anxiousness over laying his hands on the ring made him awake
and alert long past his usual bedtime. Gaining some control over his
eagerness, Ranma made his way to his room. Just as he was about to enter, he
noticed Akane emerging from the bathroom, already dressed in her pajamas.

"What are you doing up?" he asked.

"I'm a little nervous about the race tomorrow. This could be your big chance
to control your curse," Akane explained.

Ranma was genuinely moved by the concern. He was trying to figure out how to
thank her, without being too blunt so she would read something into it that
wasn't there and become creeped out, when he heard movement coming from the
living room. He saw the noise had caught Akane's attention too, and she was
looking in the same direction.

Ranma moved Akane behind him and tensed for a fight. "Maybe Tarou's come
back again to try to take out the competition early." He sneaked forward,
Akane following behind far enough to stay out of Ranma's way but still close
enough to help if she could.

The pair emerged into the living room and were taken aback by what was
there. "What are you doing, Kachi?" Ranma asked.

Kachiko turned away from the pile of items she had been working on. "I'm
preparing for tomorrow's battle. That Tarou guy is tough, but with the
information you've given me, I'm know I can outsmart that oversized bovine."

Ranma gave a dismissive wave of his hand. "You don't have to worry about
him. I can handle Bull-Butt, no problem. I've beaten him before."

"He's still dangerous," Kachiko warned.

"Ah, he ain't nothing," Ranma bragged. "You're looking at someone who beat a
god once."

Kachiko rolled her eyes at the declaration. "Oh, please. I've heard some
pretty tall tales in my time, but beating a god? You can't expect anyone to
actually believe that."

"It's true," Akane confirmed. "I was there. Ranma beat him."

Sensing Akane's sincerity, Kachiko's expression of dubiousness became one of
awe. "That's amazing. I knew you were tough, but I didn't think you were
that powerful. I'm seriously impressed."

Ranma laughed confidently at the praise, but didn't deny it. It was the
truth, after all.

Kachiko continued looking at Ranma appreciatively. "I never beat a god. I
did beat someone that claimed he was a god, but he was full of crap."

"Really?" Akane asked, interested in hearing what her mother had to say.

Seeing Ranma was attentive as well, Kachiko began to explain. "Actually it's
kind of a funny story. You see, it sort of began because I accidentally
destroyed this treasure map Gosenkugi had, and it was totally not my fault.
Since Gos was an acquaintance, and I felt kind of bad for him, I promised
him I'd replace it. I asked around about important maps. Eventually I heard
these rumors about this ancient lost race living in the inland of China
having a map that led to some magical place. Naturally, I went to find them
and get the map. The usual gang followed since it was going to be fun. Once
I got there, I find these guys pretty easily, only there was a little
complication. There was this big jerk with a stupid set of wings that went
around saying he was god and how lowly people like me had no right
challenging him for the map since he was a god and everything and I was just
a worm. So after he finishes with his speech about how great he is, and how
unimportant I am, I said to him, 'How do you figure you're a god?' And he
tells me how he can basically fly and shoot flames. So of course I say I
really don't think having abilities that are a cross between a sparrow and
an oversized lighter really constitutes divinity. Well, he flipped his birdy
little brain and attacked me. Can you believe that?"

Both Akane and Ranma looked at each other, then turned their attention back
to Kachi. Slowly, Ranma said, "He shot flames and could fly?"

"Yeah, but it was no problem. It's not like he was dangerous or anything,"
Kachiko said with a dismissive wave of her hand. "The smaller flames I could
just dodge out of the way. For the really big blasts he tossed around, well,
it's like when you're training by the ocean. You don't try to stop a whole
wave, you ride it out to avoid harm. So I used the same technique that lets
you walk across hot coals without getting burned, amplified about a hundred
times, and rode out the blasts the way you would surfing waves. I mean 'Mr.
Bird God' was seriously a one-trick pony with fire being the only thing he
could do. Okay, his whole regeneration thing was a bit tricky, but I would
have eventually figured a way around it and kicked his ass good and proper,
but it turned out I didn't have to. Wakaba helped me out by giving me a
chance to trick him into dive bombing into a vat full of liquid nitrogen."

Kachiko didn't feel the need to mention that Wakaba had been so caught up in
the action that she had mistakenly told Kachiko, 'Jump into the vat and you
won't have to worry about the bird guy anymore.' Kachiko had tensed up to
dive into it, but slipped and fell flat on the ground. It proved to be most
opportune, since at that very moment the bird brain had swooped down on her
with some kind of weird-looking spear and tried to impale her with it.
Instead, he missed and ended up plunging into the vat of liquid nitrogen
instead. Wakaba had been so ashamed of nearly screwing up that she had cried
for hours afterward. Kachiko tried to console her and said she understood
that people often made mistakes when under pressure, but it had done little
good; Wakaba wailed for just about forever. Kachiko again thanked the stars
for being blessed with good friends that cared about her well being.

"You... beat... him?" Ranma barely managed to get out.

"Yeah. It was easy. We're talking instant birdcicle," Kachiko bragged. "So I
told all the remaining bird people that if they didn't cough up the map, all
the king's horses and all the king's men wouldn't be able to put Humpty
Ice-cube back together again. So they handed us the map and we helped them
thaw out bird brain. Only it turned out that he had been frozen too fast or
something, and he, get this, reverted to being in an egg. You should have
heard them whining about how it would take years for him to hatch again and
heat up the joint, which was just plain stupid. I mean they're half birds.
When it gets cold, all they need to do is fly south for the winter." Kachiko
stated it as though it was the most obvious thing in the world.

"You... took... their... map?" Akane said, trembling slightly.

Kachiko laughed nervously. "Well about the map. A funny thing happened. I
really did intend to give it to Gos, but I sort of, and this is the funny
part, lost it in a card game while I was in China. If I recall correctly, it
was to some guide running a famous hot spring or something. I wanted to
check it out, since it would be cool to visit a foreign hot spring, but
Sakura said it was time to go back home so we left instead. She could put a
real damper on things sometimes. Anyway, the whole thing turned out to be a
big waste of time. Pretty funny, huh?" Kachiko asked...

....And looked into two faces whose glare alone threatened to pull her into a
hellish abyss where her soul would be damned for an eternity.

"What?! What?!" Kachiko cringing back in fright.

A miasma of hatred clung to Ranma as he said is slow, dangerous tones, "You
mean to tell me that from hauling my butt halfway across a continent."

"To being kidnapped," Akane added.

"To nearly being frozen to death."

"To nearly being drowned."

"To nearly being boiled alive."

"To being shrunk to the size of a doll."

"WAS ALL YOUR FAULT?!!" the pair said as one.

"What are you two talking about?" Kachiko backed away, realizing neither was
in the mood to give her answer that didn't involve tremendous amounts of
violence, and prepared to retreat to somewhere, like Hokkaido.

She wasn't anywhere near fast enough as two irate martial artists fell upon
her.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxx

It was morning as Kasumi happily started breakfast and prepared to feed the
majority of her family.

She was in the middle of steaming some rice when Kachiko staggered into the
kitchen. Kasumi turned to her and said, "Good morning, Mother."

"Ur," Kachiko groaned, heading directly for the refrigerator. She flung open
the door, grabbed something with alcohol in it, removed the top and drank
nearly a third of the contents in one gulp.

Kasumi stared in disapproval at the display. "It's really a bit early to
drink so heavily, don't you think?

"Ur," Kachiko said again.

Kasumi noticed something odd, besides the fact no one had had to drag
Kachiko out of bed. "Mother?"

"Ur."

"I thought it was your other eye that was black."

Kachiko stared balefully at Kasumi, then wandered out of the room, mumbling,
"Stupid jerks blaming me for all their stupid problems they stupidly get
into like it's my fault. I'll show them. I'll win the race and give first
prize to Pantybull just to piss them off," Kachiko swore as she headed up
for her room, bottle in hand.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx











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