I searched for and found the first two chapters of this story on-line, and read them, and then this one, and now I'm hooked!  This seems like a promising idea.  I'm very intrigued by your notions of Kasumi and Tofu, two characters that aren't used that often in favor of flashier personalities.  The Waking World vs. this shared dream of theirs is really a good idea.  The only thing I'd ask of you (and you may already have this planned) is that you explore Tofu's and Kasumi's reactions to each other when they next meet in the Waking World, as well as the observations and reactions of those who know them.  Do they know that they share an existence in the dream world?  How would they ascertain this fact without looking like a fool in case they were wrong?  (Perhaps the repetition of a short conversation they had while asleep would provide proof enough.)
There were some minor spelling errors, very few grammatical errors, but I have not the time at present to go over them.  If no one else does and you wish it of me, please respond privately and I'll be happy to oblige as soon as I can.
A fan,
Andrea Hill



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