I enjoyed the fic. 

One of best parts about this was how the prose flowed. You did a very good job of building images without clogging the flow with you much description. Very well done. The opening scene with Beryl was extremely nice. Without really getting specific, you told me who the jane doe was, where she was, and her current condition. Nicely done. 

Now, I'm curious whether this will be an alt uni, as it would seem to be, or a very odd retelling of the original series of events. Or it could be much later in the series, and crazyness is about to ensue. 

Not telling that worked very well as a hook. Now title the fic. 

Miashara


             .---Anime/Manga Fanfiction Mailing List----.
             | Administrators - ffml-admins@anifics.com |
             | Unsubscribing - ffml-request@anifics.com |
             |     Put 'unsubscribe' in the subject     |
             `---- http://ffml.anifics.com/faq.txt -----'