Subject: [FFML] [Ranma/ Pretty Sammy] Magical Girl Pretty Ranko?!, Chapter 2
From: "Asgeras" <>
Date: 11/21/2002, 6:15 AM
To: "FFML" <>

Disclaimer:  I don't own either Ranma � or Magical Girl Pretty Sammy.  
I do, however, own the only fanfic I know of which crosses them over.  
Just goes to show how twisted my mind is.  ^_^

*...* denotes thoughts.
[...] denotes a panda sign.

What went on before: Pretty simple, actually.  The next in line for 
the throne of a magical world called Juraihelm chose Ranma as her 
champion, to make the earth a better place.  Needless to say, Ranma 
wasn't thrilled with becoming a magical girl, but when he was told 
that it'd let him control his curse...*picture of Ranma jumping up 
and down*.  

Warning: This is turning out to be quite a bit different then the 
first, especially in the beginning.  Email me to tell me if you 
prefer the original style.  If that's the case, I'll switch back and 
it'll become a short 3/ 4 chapter series.  As is, *shrug*  I don't 
know how long it'll run.

For those of you who don't know anything about Magical Girl Pretty 
Sammy, a really, really quick character guide is set up in the 
following three paragraphs.  If you know it, feel free to skip ahead.

Tsunami: Chosen by the counsel of Juraihelm to be the next in line 
for the throne.  She is required to select someone from earth to 
become her champion.  If the girl she selects does well, the throne 
is assured.  

Ramia:  Tsunami's rival for the throne.  By all appearances she seems 
to be a much better choice for the throne.  She's beautiful, 
intelligent, and down to 'earth', but has quite the ego.  In order to 
prove that she is the right choice for the throne, she chooses her 
own champion, to do battle with Pretty Sammy and prove that Tsunami 
was the wrong choice.

Rumiya:  Ramia's little brother/ lackey.  He is sent on her errands, 
including setting up things with her chosen champion.  In order to do 
so, he transforms into a bird and turns her into Pixy Misa, without 
her ever knowing about it.

Magical Girl Pretty Ranko?!
Chapter 2

 Ranma muttered to himself as he tried to find his way home.  
Wait a minute...strike that.  As she tried to find HER way home.  
Ranma blinked a couple times.  *Might as well change back.  After all, 
it's the only good thing that came out of this whole thing.*

 Ranma stopped in the middle of the side walk, taking a quick 
moment to concentrate on turning back into a male.  *Ahhh...much 
better!*  Ranma started walking down the street when something 
brought him to a halt.  Why was 'his' chest bouncing up and down as 
'he' walked.  Looking down, Ranma verified that, yup, 'he' was 
definitely still a she.

 Stopping once again, she closed her eyes and put all of her 
thoughts towards turning back into a male.  *I will turn male, I 
will turn male, I will turn male,* she started thinking in a mantra.  
After a couple minutes of concentration with no success, she opened 
her eyes to see everyone staring at her.  She tried to think of why, 
when she heard some kid tug on her mother's dress.  "Why's that girl 
saying she wanna turn into a guy, Momma?"

 Ranma's cheeks turned crimson as she made a desperate jump to 
the roof.   Incidentally, people started moving down below.  Jumping 
35 feet was much more normal than finding girls who were muttering 
about wanting to be guys.

 On route back to the Tendo Dojo, Ranma cursed the name 
Tsunami. "Baka princess.  'It'll give you control over your curse', 
she says," Ranma sneered while scrunching her face up in a manner 
that was supposed to be condescending.  All it actually succeeded in 
doing was making her even more cute than usual.  "I swear, when I get 
my hands on her..."

 "Akane boot you out again, Ranchan," she heard Ukyo shout 
from down below.  Sure enough, she was near Ucchan's Okonomyaki.  
Ranma debated on whether he should head home or stop to talk to her, 
when her stomach growled.   

 "If you want, I can whip you up a deluxe okonomyaki."

 Ukyo blinked as she felt a sudden breeze.  Turning so she 
could see her restaurant, she saw Ranma already waiting quietly by 
the door.  Grinning, Ukyo made her way to the door.  Things were 
turning out pretty well today.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * 

 Ramia could be seen frowning, as she flopped onto her bed.  
*How in the world did Tsunami get picked to be Juraihelm's heir?  I 
mean, it's Tsunami, the ultimate airhead!!!  Geesh.  There's no 
telling what kind of damage she might end up doing!*

 Ramia tried to come up with a solution.  She absentmindedly 
beckoned to a floating crystal that was about twice the size of a her 
head.  It sputtered to life and slowly made it's way toward her.

 As soon as it reached her, Ramia snapped her fingers.  Turning 
towards the crystal, she started whispering in a slow, quiet voice.  
"I call upon the crystal of Juraihelm.  Show me the way that I may 
claim this realm."  *Stupid incantations.  Hmmph.*

 A picture started to appear within the crystal.  It was rather 
blurry at first, but started to clear up after a couple of moments.  
However, she wished she could turn it off once it did clear up.  She 
smacked it in the side.  "That's a picture of Tsunami's chosen one, 
you dolt.  I want to get RID of her, not help her."

 The crystal grew a pinkish color in it's background.  Ramia 
wondered if it might actually be blushing.  She discounted that when 
it rushed forward and bumped into her forehead.  She made a side-note 
not to anger the all powerful crystal.

 Grabbing the edge of the bed, she hoisted herself up and 
stared back into the crystal.  On a second look, Tsunami's kid was 
just on the edge.  The main image seemed to be focused on a girl that 
was across from him.

 Studying the image and the little details that gave away her 
background (a.k.a. Big battle spatula), she started to smile.  Maybe 
things wouldn't be so bad after all.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * 

 Ranma finished his third deluxe okonomyaki with a flourish 
that only a Saotome family member could hope to accomplish.

 "Hey, Ucchan, thanks again for the water and food," he said 
as he got up and headed for the door.

 "Wait up, Ranchan.  I was just about to close up anyway, 
since there's nobody here.  Maybe I can walk home with you?" she said 
as she finished making sure that her grill was off and grabbed her 
battle spatula.  

 Ranma stood there in indecision.  *Bring Ukyo, don't bring 
Ukyo.  Bring Ukyo, don't bring Ukyo.  Friendship, beat up by Akane.  
Be kind to a cute girl who offers great food, be kind to a cute girl 
that shoves toxic substances down my throat.*  Ranma grinned at her.  
"Sounds good ta me."

 Ranma headed outside, then bunched his legs up, getting 
ready to hop to a nearby roof when he felt a hand on his shoulder.  
"How about doing this the normal way?  It's getting a little chilly 
for rooftop racing."

 Ranma turned around and shrugged.  The cold never bothered 
him all that much.  At least, not since he swam to and from China.  
Now THAT was cold.

 They walked together, side by side, in companionable silence.  
It wasn't the first time that Ranma enjoyed silence, but it never 
felt as good or comfortable as it did with Ucchan.

 A couple of blocks from the dojo, Ukyo stopped.  "I better 
get back.  No need to get Akane mad at you."  *Or me,* she thought to 

 Ranma bowed then gave her his characteristic smirk.  "Always 
great to walk home with a good looking girl."

 Ukyo blushed before she could turn away.  "Thanks," she 
mumbled, then started running back to her restaurant.

 The smirk never left his face as Ranma started the last leg 
of his trip.


 Shampoo looked down to see what she'd crashed into.  Seeing 
Ranma stuck underneath her front tire, she gave out a squeal of joy, 
threw her bike off to the side and her take out container high into 
the air.  "Wo de airen, Ranma," she gushed, glomping Ranma.

 Ranma tried, unsuccessfully, to push her away.  Not only was 
he having trouble breathing, but knowing his luck...

 "RANMA!!!!," could be heard throughout Nerima.  People who 
were eating put down their utensils and bowed their heads in prayer 
for this Ranma.  From the sounds of it, he'd need all the help he 
could get.

 Ranma slowly turned his head around.  Sure enough, Akane was 
behind him and glowing a very unhealthy shade of blue.  Well, 
unhealthy for him, anyway.

 "Akane, wait, I can explain," he said, still trying to push 
off Shampoo, who seemed totally oblivious to his impending doom.

 "No need to explain.  You vanish for several hours, than show 
up with Shampoo clinging to your leg," Akane yelled.  "It's perfectly 
clear!!!  What could you possibly say to those facts?"

 "Ummm...I was framed?"

 "Ranma no baka," Akane screamed as booted him into orbit.

 *This day just keeps getting better and better,* he thought 
as he glided through the air.  Looking at the height and trajectory, 
it'd be a half hour minimum before he was able to get back.  Oh well, 
it was always beautiful up here.  Plus, unlike some fianc�es he could 
name, birds tended to listen.

 As if to prove his point, a exotic looking red bird flew up 
to him and landed on his shoulder.  Just as he was starting to speak 
to it, it started to peck at his head.  *Nope.  Definitely not a good 
day.  Then again, don't see how it could get any worse.*

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * 

 Ukyo sat down on a bench, going over the day's events.  She'd 
actually been able to spend time with Ranma!!!  Then again, did it 
really matter?  She was hardly ever able to see him outside of school 

 She continued pondering her Ranma problems, when she noticed 
a beautiful bird looking at her from atop a tree branch.  She'd never 
seen anything like it before, such a bright red, and those eyes...
those eyes...

 Then, the world went black.  Moments later Ukyo was replaced 
by a girl with blonde hair and a rather daring purple and black two 
piece dress.  Pixy Misa smiled.  Today was going to be fun.  In fact, 
she could sense the perfect playmates nearby.  Pixy Misa's smile 
turned feral.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * 

 Ranma was once again found herself in her female form as she 
entered the last stretch homeward.  Why was it that every time he was 
sent into on these little trips he landed in water?  Did he really 
piss the kami off that much?!

 Ranma paused as she heard a commotion nearby.  Knowing the 
two of them, Akane and Shampoo were probably still fighting with each 
other.  As usual, she'd have to break them up.  Ranma sighed as she 
started to break into a run.

 What she saw when she rounded the corner was the last thing 
she expected.  There were two huge, ugly, green...creatures in front 
of the dojo.  From the looks of things, they were really enjoying 
their fight.  Wait, scratch that.  They were enjoying a game of 
patti-cake.  Only problem was that occasionally one of them would 
fall over and destroy something.  All around were broken fences, 
light poles, and power lines.

 Ranma went up to one of them and tapped them on it's leg.  No 
need to be rude.  Maybe they were good monsters.  "Could you guys 
stop?  You're kinda trashin' the whole neighborhood."

 The creature bent over and Ranma got into a fighting stance 
in preparation.  No way was this....

 She found herself in a bear hug before she even realized the 
creature moved.  Not only that, but it rivaled Shampoo at her worst.  
*Gotta get out...*

 "Oh ho ho ho," was heard coming from the side.  Ranma turned 
her head, expecting to see Kodachi, but instead was treated to the 
site of a new girl.  She couldn't turn her head far enough to see the 
girl that well, but knew she wasn't Kodachi.  Kodachi never wore 
anything like that!!

 "I see you've met my luv luv monsters.  It looks like they're 
quite happy to see you.  In fact, I'd wager that they'll love you to 
death, and the only one that can save you is that magical girl, the 
so called Pretty Ranko.  Too bad she's nowhere to be found. "

 Ranma groaned as she heard this.  Looking at the evidence, 
she had to concede.  There was no way she could fight these things 
without some help.  They were just too fast.

 She used every ounce of her strength and was able to break 
free.  Before they could have a chance to grab her again, she ran 
into an alley and...and...where's that blasted wand?

 The rod appeared in her hands almost as soon as she 
visualized the horrific pink atrocity.  Sighing, she realized that 
there was no way to get out of what was going to happen.

 "Pretty Princess Makeup Activation," she muttered.  Sure 
enough, she was thrown up into the air and slowly spun around as her 
'battle costume' formed around her.  *Isn't this supposed to take a 
shorter amount of time then it did before?*

 Ranko fell back to the earth and got ready to run when she 
heard a voice behind her.  "Pretty Ranko.  Are you ready for your 
first battle?"

 A chill ran up Ranko's spine as she slowly turned around.  
She'd heard that voice before.

 Ranko got ready to run as fast as she could, after seeing the 
cabbit, when she realized a couple of things.  First off, she wasn't 
freaked out.  It was just like a bad memory.  And second, that thing 
wasn't a cat.  Close though.  Very, very close.

 "Yeah, yeah.  World is in danger, blah, blah, blah," she 

 "Yes, go get them.  The magical attacks should be in your 
head, ready to use."

 Ranko nodded, as she ran out the alley.  Time to get down to 

 "Stop.  In the name of love and justice and all innocent lamp 
posts, you shall be punished."  Ranma groaned as she finished her 
speech.  Where did that come from?

 Both of the monsters turned around and tried to attack her.  
This time around, they seemed to be a bit slower.  They were still 
fast, but this time it was like fighting Ryoga.  *Umm...then again, 
maybe not,* she thought to herself as she finished a kick to one of 
their heads.  It was a clean hit.  Problem was, her leg bounced off, 
almost as if she'd hit a pillow.

 "Use your magic, Pretty Ranko," Ryo-ohki yelled from the 

 Jumping back a couple paces she raised her baton into the 
air, shouting the first thing that came to her mind.  "Sugar Glitter 
Attack," she shouted.  A spout of pinkish dust came from her wand and 
struck the creature, causing it to shrink back into the form of Akane.

 Ranko blinked.  It wasn't that the creature turned into 
Akane.  It wasn't even the fact that the attack actually worked.  No, 
what really hit Ranko was how lame her attack was.  Sugar Glitter 
Attack?!  *Beware, enemies of good.  Quake in your boots at the fear 
of...pixy dust.*  

 She searched her mind for anything better.  She gulped as she 
got ready to perform the least humiliating/ insane attack she could 
find.  It was pretty sad, really.

 She dropped her wand to the floor then pirouetted around.  
Sticking one hand on her hip, she kissed the other and made as if she 
was going to blow the monster a kiss.  Instead, she whispered, in a 
low sultry voice, "Sexy lips parade."  A row of lips shot out from 
her hand, one after the other, and hit the creature square in the 
chest, making it revert back into Shampoo.

 Ranko jumped as cheers went up all around her.  Looking 
around, she noticed that there was a sizable crowd watching the 
display she just gave.  She blushed and was about ready to yell at 
some of the boys she noticed staring at her a little too hard, when 
she heard a voice off to her right side.

 Turning around she saw her.  The perfect girl!!  That lush 
blonde hair.  That sexy two piece dress.  Those cute pouting lips.  
Why didn't any of her fianc�es look like that?

 Pixy Misa, however wasn't thinking about love.  Here, this 
girl had come along and ruined her fun.  She was assured that it 
would be an easy victory.  She was told that Pretty Ranko wouldn't 
even be likely to show up, but nooo, she had to not only show up, but 
use such powerful attacks.  Grrrr.

 "Mark my words, Ranko.  This isn't over.   It's only just 
beginning and next time I'll be sure to program my monsters to dodge," 
she said.  She looked at Ranko, expecting her to cower in fear.  *Why 
did her pupils turn into hearts?  Oh couldn't be.  Is she 
going to attack?*   Pixy Misa's eyes grew twice as big, then she ran 
away as quickly as possible.

 Ranko tried to call out to her, but she just seemed to 
increase her speed.  *Drats,* she thought, snapping her fingers.

 Ranko jumped up to a nearby rooftop and ran to the nearest 
secluded alley, where she changed back into her regular form.

 "That was pretty good, Ranko," she heard Ryo-Ohki call out 
from behind her.  She still got a chill, but she knew she could stand 
it.  After all, she didn't panic before, since she found out it wasn't 
a cat.

 She saw that small furry body, with the long whiskers 
sprouting from it's face, hunched over on four legs.  Did I mention 
the whiskers?  "Aaaaaa," she screamed as she crashed through a nearby 

 Ryo-Ohki sighed.  *Guess I'll have to stay away from 
her...him...her unless she's transformed.  *Things certainly are 
interesting around that one.*

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * 

 Back in Juraihelm, Tsunami was watching the end of the battle 
in her own crystal.  As soon as it finished, a set of scales tipped 
towards the right hand side.  *Wonderful.  One point for Ranko!!  
Guess she wasn't such a bad choice after all.*

 She clapped her hands, then turned towards Ramia and gave her 
a hug.  "Isn't it great, Ramia?  Good has triumphed!"

 "Yeah, yeah.  Great.  Real, real great," Ramia mumbled.  
*Shoot me now.*

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * 

 Ukyo woke up on the park bench she been resting on earlier.  
*Must've fallen asleep.  Hmmm....I wonder why I'm still so tired.  
Guess I better get back home so I can go to bed.*

End Chapter 2.

Authors Notes:  Well, it's finally done.  A good portion was written 
while I was half asleep.  *yawn*  Take it with a grain of salt.  
Plus, I tried to incorporate an actual plot, while keeping a definite 
sense of humor, which became more prominent towards the end.  As is, 
I know I can make it at least six episodes long.  However, I imagine 
it will be quite a bit longer than that, if people actually want to 
see it continued.

For the previous chapter, please go to: .

As always, please send all comments to, 
unless they apply to the whole post.  Thanks.


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