Yep, what I've been threatening to do for more than a year now has finally
seen the light of day. 'Things' isn't abandoned, I just needed a break is
all. And this idea has been on the backburner for some time. So close your
eyes and cover your ears...


Prologue

The early morning hour made Kasumi Tendou yawn. She raised one hand to her
mouth while she continued frying vegetables in the skillet with the other.
She observed their blackening condition through bleary eyes, satisfied at
their progress. Sometimes cooking for her family was a chore, but she did
care for them and her willingness to do such was her way of expressing that.
There was also the fact that had Kasumi not done it, Akane would quickly
volunteer to take her place, and then it would be over for all of them. No,
it was simply better this way.

A second yawn overcame her. She reached into her bathrobe and scratched at
an itchy spot under her breast. As she removed the skillet from the stove
and placed the vegetables into a mixing bowl, she noted she was far too
young to be this tired. She was only nineteen, and should have had far more
endurance. It was hard to believe she was feeling the effects of the
previous night, or more accurately, the very early morning. Club hopping
with Yui and the girls was fun, but it had taken its toll. It used to be she
could party all night long, grab a couple hours of sleep, and be wide awake
and ready for a full day of school. Now all it took was a six pack and a
couple hours of dancing to tire her out; it was disgraceful.

There was another detail that made Kasumi even more depressed than her lack
of endurance. Almost none of the guys at the clubs had hit on her. Usually
she had her pick of the lot when going out, but last night there hadn't been
more than a handful of come on's by only the worst of the men. True, it was
a quiet night for the club and there were far fewer men than usual, but even
Yui had some luck with a couple of cute guys hitting on her. Maybe now that
Kasumi was out of high school, she was beginning to turn frumpy. She hoped
that wasn't the case, but why else would she have no luck with guys trying
to pick her up?

The doorbell rang. No one else was awake yet, so Kasumi turned from her food
preparation and headed to the front door. Her bare feet crossed the wood
floor, chilling her slightly and making her feel more awake than before. She
came to the door and opened it. The visitor was a plain-looking boy with
several plastic bags in his hands. There was nothing extraordinary about
him; he was a standard pimply-faced sixteen year old, one Kasumi didn't
recognize. She wondered if he was one of Akane's friends. It wasn't a school
day, but perhaps she had agreed to do something early today.

"This is the Tendou residence, isn't it?" the youth asked, grimacing as he
shifted his burden uncomfortably.

Then it finally clicked "Oh, the groceries." Kasumi decided she must have
been really tired to have forgotten about their delivery this morning.
Cooking was bad enough, but she refused to do the shopping as well. Having
groceries delivered made things so much easier. "Come inside," she
instructed him.

The youth did so, placing the bags on a nearby stand. He looked at her
expectedly. "Ten thousand yen."

Kasumi looked around. Of course her purse would be upstairs, and she had no
money on her. She was about to tell the boy to wait a moment when a second
idea came to her. She stood in front of him, undid the tie at her waist and
opened her robe.

The boy's look didn't change as he went from staring at Kasumi's face to her
body. Eyes riveted to her, he pulled out his wallet, handed her ten thousand
yen, then turned and exited the house with a profound stiffness in his
stride.

Kasumi retied the robe and closed the door. Oh yes, she still had what it
took.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Ranma: Sextacular
Chapter 1

A lemony alternate universe I've been threatening to do for sometime.

Any and all C+C is appreciated. You can contact me at
sommer@3rdm.net

All of my fics are stored at the following:

Larry F's new address at:
http://www.rakhal.com/florestica

Or R+C books at:
http://dbsommer.rcbooks.org

And also Angcobra is now storing all but my latest fics, at
http://dbsommer.web1000.com/dbsommer.html

Standard Disclaimer: I don't own the Ranma 1/2 characters. They belong to
Takahashi and whomever she sold the rights to.

Since this is a lemon, no one under eighteen should read this for fear of
having your eyes burn out of your head.

Writer's note: Yep, we're going to start at the very beginning again, but
hopefully the twists will keep you interested. We're going to be humor
oriented this time out. There will be an underlying plot to everything, so
it's not a true PWP lemon, but it's definitely not meant to be a very
'serious' work either. It's really nothing more than an excuse for some
basic naughtiness and good fun.

Also this particular chapter has no outright 'lemon' scenes. However it does
earn its lemon tag for all the fanservice, crude language, suggestive
scenes, and dialogue that are included.

Throughout the series I will be using the 'Ranma-chan' appellation to denote
female Ranma due to gender being important to this, despite the fact it is
technically improper.

That's enough notes. On to the fic. And yes, the opening is similar, but the
changes, as evidenced in the prologue, will be readily apparent.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Rain fell heavily upon the streets of Nerima, deluging crowds of people who
paid it no mind. Their attention was instead focused on a panda pursuing a
red-haired girl. The pair were running through the streets, the girl barely
managing to stay ahead of the giant creature.

The panda held up a sign. *But we have to go meet my old friend.*

The girl shouted, "No way, you stupid old tub of lard! I want to find a cure
to my condition! The only reason I came back to Japan was because you told
me you knew someone that could fix this! I should have known better!"

The panda lunged at her, only to meet a foot that connected solidly with his
jaw. The blow sent the dampened creature hard to the ground, cracking the
pavement with the impact.

The girl unleashed a satisfied grin at her handiwork. "That takes care of
that. Now to figure out a way to get back to China." She turned her back to
the panda and began to walk off.

Still lying on the street, the panda held up a sign. *He has three teenage
daughters.*

The girl stopped in mid-stride, turned around and walked up to the panda.
"Well geez, Pop, why didn't you say that in the first place?" She helped the
panda to his feet and brushed some of the street grime from his fur. Now far
more respectful, the girl said, "Lead the way, Old Man."

Most of the passersby thought they could make out a look of recrimination on
the panda's features when it stared at the girl, if such a feeling could be
communicated on its animalistic features. However, whatever expression the
creature held disappeared as it lumbered down the street, its human
companion following merrily along.

Xxxxxxx

Soun Tendou looked at the postcard in his hand. So it was finally that time,
was it? He wondered how the girls were going to react to the information he
was about to give them. It would make things... interesting, to say the
least. Perhaps he should have informed them beforehand to prepare them for
what was to come. No, knowing his girls, any previous knowledge of the issue
would not make a bit of difference when it came time to make a choice.
Either they would accept things or they would not. In the latter case it
would fall to him to convince them of the necessity of the matter. Promises
had to be upheld, after all, and this was possibly the most important of
them all.

Now the moment of truth was upon him, even more quickly than he would have
expected. Today was the date mentioned on the card. Obviously the mail
service was becoming inept if it took them that long to deliver a mere
postcard.

Course decided, Soun situated himself at the dinner table, striking the pose
he thought would express the importance of the matter. Satisfied, he raised
his hand to his mouth and shouted out, "Kasumi! Nabiki! Akane!" There could
be no doubt the cry reached throughout his home. The final wheel had been
set in motion.

Within moments his three daughters appeared. Seeing their father sitting at
the table in a familiar manner, one of seriousness, the three sat down
opposite him at the table and regarded him with looks ranging from Kasumi's
warm one, to Nabiki's guarded pseudo-glare.

Soun cleared his throat. "I have something very important to inform you
about. A friend of mine is arriving with his son today, and they are going
to be staying with us for a while."

 "This is sort of at the last minute, isn't it, Father?" Kasumi clucked at
her father's neglect "I'll have to prepare bedding for them in one of the
spare rooms."

"How long are the staying?" Nabiki asked.

Akane stared at her sister in disappointment. "Nabiki, they're guests and
Dad's friends. It doesn't matter how long they're going to stay."

"True," Nabiki admitted. "It's not like I'm the one that's going to be
cleaning up after them."

Kasumi stiffened slightly. "Exactly how long did you say they were going to
stay, Father?"

Soun placed his hand behind his head and laughed embarrassingly.

The response made all three of the girls tense up. Nabiki took the lead.
"All right Daddy, spill it. What aren't you telling us?"

He shifted nervously. "Yes, well, they might be staying for a very long time
is all.."

All three stared at him suspiciously.

Soun cursed their ability to read him so easily; a trait they had picked up
from their mother. Now that there was no hope of easing them into the idea,
he decided to come clean and inform them. He knew he should have waited for
a better opportunity when they might have been more receptive to the plan.
Like when they were drunk, or something. "Oh yes. It was also our intention
to have one of you marry the boy. Joining the schools and such. Saotome and
I came up with the idea and thought it a good idea at the time." He laughed
again.

Suspicion turned to surprise.

Kasumi was the first to speak this time. "Is he older? I don't like younger
men. They're so inexperienced."

Nabiki asked, "Is he hung? I'm tired of going out with average guys. I want
someone that's really going to make me feel it in the morning."

Akane stared with disapproval at her sisters. "Come on, you guys. There's
more to men than just how good they are at sex."

Nabiki gestured grandly. "Oh yes, there's handsome older guys that are
semi-bishonen to really get your motor running."

Akane blushed. "Cut it out, Nabiki."

Nabiki continued. "And then there's their perfectly gentlemanly attitude
towards you instead of looking at you like a piece of meat they want to
devour. Of course one must consider the reason for that being-"

"I said knock it off!" Akane snapped.

Nabiki did so, making it clear she was backing off on her own and not
because of the implied threat.

Deciding to get back some of her own, Akane said, "Why are you interested
anyway? I thought you were going out with Matsui."

"I'm always looking for something better," Nabiki said nonchalantly.

"Oh, so he dumped you." Kasumi gave her younger sister a sympathetic gaze.

Nabiki shrugged. "Yeah. Evidently blow jobs weren't enough to keep him in
line anymore."

"You have fleeced him out of a lot of money," Akane reminded her.

Rather than be offended, Nabiki shrugged. "Relationships are give and take,
and I like being treated right. It's not like he didn't get anything out of
it, you know. Lots of guys would like to go out with me."

"Lots of guys have gone out with you," Akane said snidely.

"Not the whole soccer team, and not all at the same time," Nabiki teased.

Akane turned a bright shade of red. "That was only because I lost a bet! It
was a one time thing! And It wasn't the whole team! A lot of them had
girlfriends and refused, and others weren't interested in that sort of
thing!"

Kasumi looked at her curiously. "What's this all about?"

Anger switched to embarrassment. "Well, you see, it was kind of at the start
of the school year. Yuka was going on and on about her new boyfriend and how
he was such a stud on the soccer team and that they were going to really
kick butt this year and win the championship. Except the soccer team sucks.
They finished 1-10 last year. So Sayuri and I were making fun of her and I
sort of said that if the team could win it all, I'd sleep with the whole lot
of them." Akane shook her fist at the skies. "How was I to know those losers
would hear about it and win all of their games by at least three goals?!"

"Never underestimate what a man will go through with the temptation of free
sex placed before him," Nabiki said sagely.

"So how many did you take on?" Kasumi asked.

Akane considered that. "Well, I was pretty drunk at the time, so it's not
like I kept count. I know I'd never been so sore in my life afterwards. I
could barely walk straight for a week. And like I said, not all the guys
were interested in it. Around ten or so, probably."

Kasumi said, "That's impressive. I only did four a couple of times back in
high school. It was never very enjoyable. Boys tend to be very quick and get
in the way of one another when they try anything at the same time, so I gave
up on that sort of thing. Oh my, is there something wrong, Father?"

The other two girls looked to see their father had turned a bright shade of
red and was staring at them awkwardly. "I'd really prefer it if you wouldn't
talk about such things in front of me."

The girls looked at him quizzically. Akane said, "How come? Mom talked liked
this all the time at the dinner table and you never seemed to mind."

Nabiki said, "Yeah. I mean, you let her keep working as a 'Full-Service'
Masseuse even after we were born. She talked shop constantly and you never
complained."

"Everything we learned about sex came from her," Kasumi said wistfully.

"Which definitely helped our popularity," Nabiki quipped.

Soun began to sweat. This never became easier to deal with. True, Ayumi had
possessed a voracious sexual appetite --it was one of the initial reasons
Soun had married her-- but even he couldn't keep up with her near limitless
endurance. After a couple of years of monogamy, he allowed (insisted,
actually) his wife return to her job in order to leave him with enough
energy to do things, like eat and breathe. Despite her innate tendencies he
had hoped the girls would have been somewhat more normal when it came to
their sex drives --well, they were compared to their mother-- but they still
tended be very energetic, and certainly as liberated in attitude as Ayumi
was. He had wanted them to grow up more reserved, but Ayumi would have none
of that. She insisted they be as sexually easygoing as she had been,
claiming it was one of the keys to her happiness in life. He hadn't the
energy to fight the matter (literally, since she could still wear him out
even on top of her job) and so the girls were like this. It made for a very
trying fatherhood.

"It's all that damned Happosai's fault," Soun muttered.

"You're happy about what?" Kasumi asked.

"I'm happy you're so receptive to the idea of Ranma coming to live here,"
Soun lied. Some secrets were best left where they were, like buried under
tons of rubble with spirit wards placed on them.

"His name's Ranma?" Akane asked.

Nabiki shook her head. "'Wild Horse'. Probably a misname. Sort of like the
fat sumo they call 'Tiny'."

"Now, Father, keep in mind none of us said we'd marry him," Kasumi reminded
him.

"We're just keeping our minds open," Akane said.

"So what's he like?" Nabiki asked.

"I don't know. I've never met the boy."

Silence met Soun.

However, the encounter didn't last long.

Nabiki slapped her hand to her forehead. "So he could be some ugly, stupid,
poor, loser and you want us to marry him."

Kasumi shook her head. "I really think you should have learned what he is
like before considering him proper marriage material, Father. There might be
something unsuitable about him."

Akane said, "What if he's some psycho that's left a trail of dead and maimed
people behind him and has a bunch of people trying to kill him and he
fixates on me and I don't realize he's nuts and end up inadvertently being
his accomplice when I try to defend him from those seeking righteous
vengeance?"

The others stared at her.

"Okay, it is a completely silly idea," Akane admitted. "But the point is he
could be screwed up and we don't know it."

"I have faith that Saotome raised the boy right," Soun said. Raising him
away from Nodoka could only help in that regard. "However, if the boy is
completely unsuitable, I will dissolve the arrangement. Ah, there is one
other thing, though. I think it would be best if you don't mention your...
colorful pasts."

Nabiki laughed at that. "Get real, Daddy. I am not going to pretend I'm some
proper Japanese pristine virgin. If I think a guy is marriage material, he's
getting to know what I'm really all about long before the wedding night."

The other girls nodded in agreement.

"Well, perhaps not bragging about your exploits would suffice," Soun
relented. "Some men are uneasy around women how openly boast about their
experiences, and Ranma might be the type that's easily intimidated."

"Very well," Kasumi agreed. "Besides, he's essentially a stranger. I
wouldn't talk to a stranger that way."

"Good point," Akane agreed.

Soun decided that would have to suffice. While it was true the boy might be
'liberated' in attitude when it came to sexual partners, it would be best to
take things slowly. If he was, the truth would be discovered soon enough. If
he wasn't, he might grow to accept the idea if he was slowly introduced to
it.

A knock on the door ended the conversation. Nabiki went to answer it, before
the others could get to their feet. Within moments, she called out. "Daddy,
did you order a panda?"

That brought the remaining three Tendous to the front door. Standing on the
front step in front of the doorway  was a large panda and a short girl.

"Hi, I'm Ranma Saotome. Sorry about this," she said with a smile.

Nabiki considered the girl. "Well, Daddy, it appears that little oversight
of yours about not feeling out the situation has indeed led to ruin. Tough
luck about the family promise and everything."

"But Saotome told me he had a boy!" Soun insisted.

"Maybe that's what he started out as, but I'd say the end result is
something else." Nabiki poked the newcomer's breast. "Silicone enhancement
if ever I saw it."

Ranma-chan "Ooo"d at the sensation. "Actually they're real, sort of," she
said, then reached out and felt Nabiki's breast. "I bet these are one
hundred percent natural, too."

When the handling lasted longer than a mere poke, and traveled more into
'groping' territory, Nabiki pinched the flesh on the back of the offending
appendage. The pain made Ranma-chan wince and release her hold.

"Actually I am a guy," Ranma-chan insisted.

Nabiki said, "Well, of course you are. No amount of surgery can change what
you are . I could dye my hair blonde, but that doesn't really make me a
blonde."

Ranma-chan was about to say something, when Akane stepped between the two,
"Nabiki stop making fun of Ranma. If someone wishes to change their gender
then they should have the right to do so without having people harass them."

"Thanks for sticking up for me," Ranma-chan said, then thought about the
statement. "Err, wait a minute. I haven't had a-"

"No need to explain anything," Akane said.

"Yes, we'll accept you for who you are," Kasumi added.

"Yeah, what they said. It just wasn't what I was expecting was all," Nabiki
said.

"He was supposed to be a boy!" Soun wailed.

The panda held up a sign. *Isn't it nice they're so accepting of your
condition, Ranma?*

"Pop, there's a serious misunderstanding here," Ranma-chan said.

"I'm sure you had your reasons for doing what you did," Kasumi supplied
happily.

Ranma-chan was about to say something else, and just gave up. "Mind if I
clean up?" she finally asked.

Kasumi ushered him inside. "Of course. The bath is this way."

xxxxxxxxxxx

As Akane made her way back from her workout in the dojo, she felt relieved.
The whole situation with the potential fiancee had been fraught with
tension. At first it was at the idea her father and sisters might have tried
to foist it on her. That would have been bad, since she had her sights set
on a man already. True, he had managed to resist her advances so far, but
every woman had struck out with him to date, so Akane didn't feel dejected.
She was certain she could win him over. It would just take time is all. She
did have something of a reputation after all (a well deserved one, she would
admit), but she had vowed to change her ways for him. If she persevered long
enough, he would see the truth, realize her sincerity, judge her to be
worthy, and then they would be together.

But that had been a concern for a while, and she had long since learned to
deal with that. The real source of her increase in tension was the
revelation about Ranma. Like Nabiki, it had caught her off-guard. Unlike
Nabiki, her heart had gone out to someone that had undoubtedly had to go
through life being a social outcast for their choice in lifestyle. Sort of
like Sayuri, though not as extreme. It made Akane want to reach out and help
the girl. Acceptance was the way to go. She'd be Ranma's friend and help
him/her anyway she needed. In a non-romantic way, of course. She had no
interest in girls, even if a lesbian was one of her best friends. And since
Ranma wanted to be a girl, Akane would regard 'her' as such.

Akane paused in her thoughts as she arrived at the bathroom. The occupied
sign wasn't up, which meant Ranma must have been done with her bath. That
was probably for the best. Akane had no fascination with the end results of
whatever was done to Ranma to make her the way she was. It wasn't the
additions that were so bad, but knowing that parts (parts Akane had enjoyed
on other men) had been cut off and tossed out in the garbage was kind of
creepy.

Pushing such thoughts from her mind, Akane entered the bath and began to
remove her clothing.

Xxxxxxxxxxx

The now male Ranma continued luxuriating in the bath. Living life on the
road made it rare that he could enjoy the simple pleasures, such as
privately soaking in a tub. Public baths were the best he and his father
could ever do. Settling down for a while, in an actual home with a roof over
his head, sounded pretty darn good to him. No more getting rained on all the
time. No more unexpected sex changing. No more chaos or crazy people trying
to hunt him down and kill him over stupid misunderstandings. He would have
peace at last.

There was also the added bonus of whom he was staying with. The conditions
couldn't be better, especially with three attractive girls living under the
same roof, one of which he was supposed to marry. Of course he was only
sixteen and didn't want to settle down yet, but there was no reason why he
couldn't 'evaluate' the girls' marriage potential and get some serious
action in the process. After all, he was still young, and had the right to
sow his wild oats. Of course, he hadn't sown any yet, but he sure wanted to.
He was just a victim of circumstance was all, and not some loser that
couldn't score with the chicks. Moving around most of the time hadn't
allowed him to get to know any girls. The few times he had settled down in
one place for any real length of time... well, there were always
complications of some kind that destroyed any chance of romance, let alone
cheap sex. And the biggest complication of all had been...

No. He had to let it go. Anger would serve no purpose now. It was over and
in the past. He was free of the 'Unspoken One's damnable presence for all
time, and it was best to let it remain that way. He had to get on with his
life. Although were they to ever cross paths again, well, there was no
telling what would happen, other than it wouldn't be pretty.

Ranma observed the pruney texture his skin had taken. That was the telltale
sign he had enjoyed luxuriating in the furo long enough. Reluctantly he rose
out of the bath and headed towards the sliding partition in the bathroom,
lost deep in thought of how he was going to explain his curse to the girls.

As Ranma slid the door open, he was confronted with a sight that caught him
completely by surprise. There was Akane, naked save for a towel in her hands
that only served to cover an indecent portion of her body. He let out a low,
"Ooo," and remained motionless, a deer caught in a pair of oncoming
headlights. Unable to react immediately, he saw with his peripheral vision a
frown form on her features. Pervious experience informed him of what was to
come. His body automatically tensed up (well, the rest of his body tensed
up; the part between his legs had already begun to do just that upon seeing
a naked girl) as he prepared to receive the thunderous slap she would
unleash upon him.

But then Akane turned around, wrapping the towel around her body, and
stomped out of the bath.

Ranma was left with only one burning thought as she exited the bathroom.
"She has a seriously cute butt."

xxxxxxxxxx

Akane was in a proper anger as she stormed into Nabiki's room. She saw that
the owner of said room was occupying it, sitting at a desk as she chewed on
a pencil and read over a book. Nabiki looked up in surprise at the girl.

Akane said, "Look, from now on tell your boyfriends to put the occupied sign
on the bath when they're using it. I walked in there and the jerk got a free
show."

"Um, Akane, I would except for one tiny detail: I don't have any boyfriends
over."

"Oh." Temporarily derailed, Akane considered the new information. "Do you
think he's Kasumi's?"

"That would be a switch. She usually doesn't bring them home." Nabiki rose
from her chair. "Let's go ask."

Now a party two, the pair headed to Kasumi's room and knocked on the door.
After identifying themselves, she let them in.

Kasumi was just starting to dress. At the moment all she wore were a lacy,
almost see-through, black bra that enhanced her already ample bust., and a
matching garter with one nylon already attached it. She was in the process
of rolling the second one up her long, trim leg. All that was left was to
attach the remaining nylon and add panties to the ensemble before her
undergarments would be complete. She stopped what she was doing, unmindful
of her partially dressed state, and said to her sisters, "What is it?"

"Getting ready for a hot date?" Nabiki asked.

"No, I was just going to wear something casual around the house," Kasumi
answered.

"Not exactly my idea of casual," Akane commented as she looked the underwear
over and felt a twinge of jealousy. She wouldn't look that good in such
sensual garments.

"That's only because of who you've dated," Kasumi said. "Young men don't
appreciate provocative underwear. All they're concerned with is getting you
out of them. They don't take time to understand what a woman goes through to
impress them."

"Makes things easier in my opinion. Less hassle," Nabiki said.

"We're getting off track," Akane said. "Was that your guy who was in the
bath?"

"No. I didn't ask anyone over. Perhaps he was Ranma's boyfriend?" Kasumi
suggested.

"I do not have a boyfriend," a male voice said from behind the girls. A
moment later, Ranma forced his way between them. "Listen up. Like I was
trying to tell you before, I'm really a..." he trailed off as he finally
espied Kasumi's mostly unclothed state. His attention was transfixed by the
sight of the tiny triangle of hair between her legs, obviously meticulous
maintained in order for it to be so perfect shaped. Not a hair was out of
place. It was like a work of art.

A backfist delivered perfectly between the eyes ended his ability to
appreciate the scenery. He was sent reeling backward and into the hall.

Akane stalked menacingly toward him. "All right. It's pretty obvious you're
some sort of peeper that broke into the house hoping for some cheap thrills.
Well, I've got news for you, Pal. What you're going to get isn't going to be
either cheap or thrilling." She cracked her knuckles.

"But I'm not-" Ranma couldn't get out another word as Akane swung at him
again. With forewarning, he backed away from the punch. The move drew Akane
away from the room and further out in the hall in order to follow him.

Kasumi, now dressed in a robe, came out from the doorway to stand beside
Nabiki and watch the fight.

Akane evaluated her opponent. "Okay, so you don't suck. That means I can go
all out against you." She launched a third punch at him.

Again Ranma darted out of the way by leaping up in the air and going
directly above Akane, not allowing her blow to come close. Now that she was
overextended, it was simple matter for him to shove her with a hand while he
hung upside down above her. He spun his body in mid-air, landing on his feet
while she stumbled onto the floor.

"Would you cut it out?!" Ranma said, directing his attention to Akane, who
was already starting to return to her feet.

"Excuse me, Peeper. I need your opinion on something," Nabiki said.

Ranma turned around, "I am not a peeper-"

Nabiki then grabbed the front of Kasumi's robe and forced it open, allowing
Ranma to get an eyeful of her again.

"Ooo," he said, as his attention was once again riveted to the girls lower
regions

The distraction was enough to allow a powerful haymaker to connect with the
back of Ranma's skull. His eyes rolled into the back of his head, and he
fell to the floor, unconscious.

"Nabiki!" Kasumi scolded as she closed her robe again, this time making sure
to tie the belt at the waist.

"It was for our protection," Nabiki contended. "It was obvious he was way
better than Akane. We needed an equalizer and that was the only one I had on
hand."

Akane stared menacingly over the fallen boy. "So what should we do with the
peeper?"

Nabiki nudged his unconscious form with her toe. "Not bad looking. Not bad
at all." She said to Akane. "You said you saw him naked in the bath, right?
What's he like? Was he hung?"

Akane considered that. "He was definitely in real good shape. It's obvious
he works out constantly, but not with big body builder type muscles. He's
kind of good-looking. Average length from what I could tell. It is just an
estimate since he wasn't at full extension or anything."

Nabiki considered that. "Too bad. If he was bigger, I'd say we tie him up
and make him our sex slave."

Kasumi looked at her aghast. "We can't just tie up any wandering stranger
who comes around and use him as a giant sex toy." She reconsidered her
words. "Well, yes, it is theoretically possible, but highly improper. If
word ever got out we'd have people trying to break into our home
constantly."

Nabiki rolled her eyes. "I was only kidding, Sis."

"Oh, sometimes it's hard to tell," Kasumi admitted. "Perhaps we should turn
him over to the police?"

Nabiki snorted derisively at that. "It would be more humane to drown him in
the pond out back then leave him to them. You know how our local
constabulary feels about 'Pre-verts'," Nabiki drawled the last word.

Akane said, "I could tie him up and hang him upside down from a tree. Then
we could start beating him with kendo sticks. We have enough of them in the
dojo."

"Treat him like a giant pi�ata?" Nabiki asked, mentally picturing it in her
mind. "I can see that."

Kasumi gave a tiny clap of her hands in delightful anticipation. "Oh, I like
hitting pi�atas. This sounds like it could be fun."

"I'll get the ropes," Akane said, quickly heading to the dojo

xxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Genma sighed, now somewhat more happy about having regained his human form.
He was a bit put off, though. This was supposed to be a day of joy, the two
houses finally on their way to being united at last. But instead of the
unbridled enthusiasm he would have dreamed about, he still held deep
reservations about the whole thing. Perhaps it would have been better to
wait a while, at least until after he and the boy had their respective
curses cured.

On the other hand, Ranma's curse might have been a blessing in disguise,
although that seemed less likely by the day. Shortly after the initial shock
of what Jusenkyou had done to them, Genma reconsidered things. Ranma had
been growing increasingly unruly of late, especially when it came to the
matter of women. Actually he was borderline lascivious at times. Most women
didn't like men quite that enthusiastic when it came to romancing them and
to be honest, Ranma was terrible when it came to seducing the opposite sex.
It was those tendencies that made Genma worry that he might scare off the
Tendou girls. If they had turned out like their mother, then it wouldn't be
a problem, but if they were the least bit normal in their tendencies, it
would potentially be disastrous. This was a critical time for the joining of
the houses. Any small mistake could cost them everything, and the marriage
might not take place.

Really, it was all Nodoka's fault. Genma knew he should have taken the boy
away when he was three or so, but she would not hear of it. Instead she
insisted that Ranma be raised as she saw fit, and the woman had some very
odd ideas of what dealings between the two genders entailed. Of course,
Genma had no complaints about it in early days of their relationship, but
the circumstances surrounding him during that time in his life were far from
usual. And as much as he loved his wife, her ideas on appropriate behavior
and tremendous sexual appetite proved too great a strain over the long term.
So Genma had been forced to steal away with the boy in the middle of the
night, hoping to take him away from her harmful influences before it was too
late.

However the damage seemed to have been done. Ranma was far too aggressive
when it came to matters of the opposite sex, even for the giant sack of
hormones teenagers became; more of his mother's influence corrupting him.
That he had almost no success with girls only seemed to make him more
determined to try again, usually applying the same methods that had already
failed once before. Even turning into a girl did nothing to decrease his
desires. Already he had used his gender changing to his advantage a number
of times when it came to going into women's public baths and such (and
suffered tremendous beatings for it when he was inevitably splashed with hot
water). Genma had no doubts it would only get worse unless the boy settled
down soon. Which was why Genma was so desperate to make the plan work, and
so concerned Ranma would blow such a golden opportunity.

Sometimes he wondered if it was simply Happosai's teachings coming back to
the fore. True, it was the fault of those teachings that had caused he and
Soun to tie the old bastard up and chuck him into a cave with the
explosives, but perhaps in his haste to escape from the Master and his
demanding lifestyle, Genma had gone too far. Now with old age Genma was
starting to see some form of sound reasoning in living life the Master's
way. It was exasperating. Sometimes Genma wondered if life wasn't a giant
pendulum and he was stuck forever swinging back and forth from one extreme
to the next.

"You seem distracted, Saotome."

Genma turned to his companion. "Just considering matters. By the way,
Tendou, do the girls act overly much like their mother?"

Soun began to sweat. "Perhaps a little. Why do you ask?"

"I suspected as much. That would explain what's going on outside." Genma
pointed out the window.

Glancing that way, Soun saw Akane hauling the bound and gagged Ranma over a
tree limb, allowing him to dangle in mid-air upside down. She then tied him
off on a peg leftover from the volleyball net they sometimes hung in back.
Once properly secured, the girls spaced themselves evenly apart around him,
and drew back their kendo sticks, ignoring the squirming youth's muffled
protests.

Soun shot to his feet. "I don't think they're starting a courting ritual
with him. I think they really mean to beat him senseless."

Genma sighed as he followed Soun out the back and shouted at the girls to
wait. So much for things turning out easy. It looked like it was going to be
the hard way again.

It was always the hard way.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxx

"Wow, so you really are a guy." Nabiki poured a kettle of hot water over the
girl's soaked head and watched in awe as Ranma's form shifted gender for the
sixth time in as many tens of seconds.

Ranma spat out some of the water. "I just had a bath, you know."

"I just never met someone like that," Nabiki said, amazed and amused at the
same time. "So, do you swing both ways?"

"No way! I'm only straight. Allow me to demonstrate my heterosexuality." He
embraced Nabiki and puckered up.

The kettle met his lips with a resounding clang. "No thanks. I'll take your
word for it." Nabiki eased herself out of his grasp and situated herself
between her sisters again.

Soun was positively beaming as he announced, "Since Ranma is actually a boy,
there isn't any reason for one of you to not marry him. We can decide on who
he should marry right now."

"Unless we have other interests at the moment," Akane said.

"Or we're looking for someone more mature," Kasumi reminded him.

"Or we don't really want to be tied down at the moment," Nabiki finished.

Ranma panicked. Ideally he had hoped the girls would fight over the right to
be engaged to him, making it easy to sleep with all of them. That they were
all attractive made him burn with desire for that outcome even more. But
with all of them balking, he had to think fast before permanent damage was
done. This was his big chance to get laid. There was no way he would let it
pass up without a fight. Fortunately, he had 'a plan' to make things go more
smoothly.

Subtly Ranma rolled back the right sleeve of his shirt and turned the inner
forearm towards his eyes. He had prepared a list of things to do to get a
girl's interest. And he knew the list was legitimate and would work. After
all, he had copied it right out of 'Cosmo'.

He looked at the words, and mentally cursed. With all the water Nabiki had
doused him with, the letters had smeared until they were almost illegible.
He brought his arm up and squinted at the first word. Something about
flattening them? He made a fist, then realized it was to 'Flatter' them.

Ranma unclenched his fist and cleared his throat. "I have to agree, though
for different reasons. It's obvious all of these girls have qualities which
would make them suitable to marry." Seeing he had the girls' interest, he
continued, starting with Kasumi. "I see that you are a mature woman that
takes her responsibilities seriously, but it does nothing to diminish your
beauty." Especially her pussy, which he had seen twice already and was eager
to catch a glimpse of a third time, and under more intimate conditions.

Seeing Kasumi accept the compliment with a smile, Ranma turned to Nabiki.
"And I can see that you're a bright and charming girl that knows what she
wants. Very shrewd and intelligent, which, while some men might find
intimidating, I find alluring."

Ranma felt a surge of pride as she obviously reconsidered her initial
assessment. His plan was working. This was the sort of sheer genius even his
father could never come up with. He continued on to Akane. "And you are
obviously active and into athletics. You also have one of the nicest asses I
have ever seen."

He saw Akane frown slightly at that. Kasumi and Nabiki seemed a bit taken
aback.

Panicking, Ranma said, "Um, you also have really firm breasts, and unlike
some guys that have a fixation on big ones, I find them really appealing,
even if they aren't as big as mine when I'm in my cursed form." He saw the
effect that had on Kasumi and Nabiki: disapproval and general amusement
respectively.

He turned to them, words coming out with a machine-gun like speed. "Not that
you two have bad chests either. I like them too. I like breasts of all
sizes, unless they are absolutely flat-chested, since I think a woman should
be shaped like a woman, which all three of you are." He began sweating, even
his father and Mr. Tendou looked irritated at his comments.

Nabiki leaned forward and patted him on the top of the head. "And you were
doing so good too, Ranma. Very nice try." She rose to her feet and said to
the two fathers, "How about this? We'll not reject the engagement out of
hand. We'll have Ranma live under our roof and get to know him better, and
after the appropriate amount of time, we can make our choice."

Both men looked relieved. Soun said, "Yes, there's no need to rush into
anything."

Genma nodded his head in agreement, but for different reasons. He could not
help feeling something was a bit off, and the recriminations about the
marriage were still there. It would definitely be for the best to wait until
he felt better about the situation.

Ranma appeared satisfied as well. Spending some time with the girls, they
could get to know him better. And once they were impressed with his
manliness they would sleep with him. Like his mother always said, women
enjoyed having their bodies appreciated by manly men. And the more manly the
man, the more appreciation they would show. And Ranma was certainly a manly
man, curse notwithstanding.

It was the natural order to things, and his mother would never steer him
wrong. But even if those teachings didn't result in his desired outcome, one
thing was for certain in staying with the Tendous.

It was sure going to be an interesting time.

xxxxxxxxxx


End notes: Now the damage has been done. This chapter was a touch slow and
on the tame side since the groundwork needed to be laid in this alternate
universe, allowing you to get a feel for what is to come. I can guarantee
this will only be worked on sporadically, since I can't write this style of
thing for long stretches of time. Second chapter might not be that long in
coming, but don't count on this being written regularly. I haven't quit work
on my other fics, it's just that I needed a break on 'Things We Wish For', I
wanted to get started on Sextacular since it'll take a long time to finish,
(it has been running around in my head for well over a year) and I wanted to
experiment with a more humorous style of lemon, which are not that common
nowadays. (well, an intentionally silly one, I should qualify). Plans are
for only one true lemon scene per chapter, since I do not want to overdo
things, and I would like some semblance of structure and plot to the story
to make it a more enjoyable read (as opposed to the Ranma's Girl 'Orgy'
series *Shudder*). I think I have a few ideas that haven't been utilized too
often in the past that should keep reader interest.

And as to Ranma and his quest to 'get some', come on, this is the
Ranmaverse. Even staying with three woman who are a bit loose in the morals
department, you know it won't be that easy. ^_^.

Thanks for reading.

And special thanks to TH Tiger for looking it over.

D.B. Sommer












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