I normally don't C&C idea/chapters, but in this case, I feel kinda
obligated.  ^_^;

Zuriel wrote:

There might be more of this, depends on whether or not someone asks for it,
or if an idea occurs to me. *shrug*

Yes, I need a better story name. Feel free to suggest one.

Worlds Upon The World?  It depends on what you want to do with this
idea.  Okay, so Lina can simply walk from world to world within The
World in approximately the same way Tsukasa and others can, though for
different reasons (and slightly different in practice: she transits
from/to the edge of any given world).  She can also mold virtual
reality to her whim, and mold real reality the same way.  She knows of
Tsukasa, and is dropping hints about him to one who wishes to find him.
Those are facts, but not plots.  You need a plot.

If you're looking for suggestions there...watch the rest of the anime,
and see just why certain of the characters are hanging out in The World
so much.  What if Lina were to grant said characters the real world use
of their avatars?  (And, more importantly, why would she do so?)

You have her saying that VR is a bad thing, but not why this is bad.
She describes the results - shared dreamworlds - but this is not
something the characters (or most of the audience) would immediately see
as bad, even with the implication that it eventually affects real
reality.  (Also, you'd have to explain why Lina has come to see it as
bad: she was perfectly comfortable with this consequence of VR
throughout SV.)

Alternately, given Lina's probably age by the time of The World, perhaps
she had a hand in creating it?  You could make some parallels between
the Lord of Nightmares from Slayers, and Lina's role relative to The
World, especially if she rarely interfered directly but saw The World
(at least, its inanimate aspects) as somehow a part of herself
(metaphor: a child she was not quite willing to give birth to and
release, even as it matured; the incidents in your story might convince
her to let go).

You also have Lina casually talking about Tsukasa to Subaru.  Why is she
doing this?  Does she wish to lead Subaru (though not necessarily her
real self) through a quest through VR and RL to see how The World is
starting to change reality such that the world is starting to become
just one giant product of Lina's imagination, and she's getting a
headache from keeping it all in her mind?

And so forth.  Choose a plot and run with it.  Mere facts are not, in
itself, enough to hold most readers' interest (or even most authors':
you may have realised this subconsciously, and if so, this might be why
you lost interest where you did).


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