[FFML] (fanfiction)(Ranma 1/2)(Please critique!)

Please critique this! I want input! I want opinions! I need encouragement! Just one fan, pleeeeeeease!

The Search for Manhood
By Andrea Hill

Comments and criticisms are very welcome! Please respond to the following email address: email_andreas_art@yahoo.com

SPOILER ALERT: The writer of this fanfiction assumes that you have read all of the manga for Ranma 1/2. There will probably be references to everything. This story takes place in the beginning of the summer after the end of the manga.

Ranma � and all of the associated characters thereof belong to Rumiko Takahashi. The author of this fan fiction is not attempting to infringe on any copyrights. In other words, I'm writing this for fun, not for money.

Note: To avoid confusion and hokey new names, Saotome Ranma will be referred to as follows. Female form = Ranma-chan. Male form = Ranma-kun. Remember "Ranko" is a GIRL'S name, and Ranma is anything but a girl, even when he does have breasts.

This story is rated PG15 for bad language and some sexual references - nothing worse than in the manga, folks!

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Chapter One
The Curse

It was one of those hot, humid nights that made everything he touched stick to his skin. The sheets he slept on would adhere like Velcro, and the light cotton sheet he started out sleeping under grew to feel like a wool blanket heaped atop him. It was the kind of night that made falling asleep hard to do, and invariably gave anyone a headache upon finally awakening. The fact that the night was so uncomfortable was not helped at all by the large, densely furred panda snoring next to him. Well, panting, anyway. Ranma finally gave up trying to fall asleep in the close atmosphere of the guest bedroom that he and his father had been inhabiting, and left in disgust, escaping the confines of the house through the window.

Outside, it was not much better. The slight breeze blew in just as hot as the rest of the air, giving no respite to feverish cheeks. Ranma settled himself down on top of the roof, peeled off his shirt and laid it out between the tiles and the bare skin of his back. Exposed thus to the stars he finally fell asleep.

>From the ground you could see the soles of his feet, toes pointing to the heavens. The big toe on his right foot twitched once, scaring away a fat green fly that had landed there.

A small form pushed itself from the ground to the roof, but the grunt that issued forth upon landing was almost silent. It carried with it an incense brazier and a small cone of black. This it placed in the brass holder upwind from the sleeping boy, and lit the tip of it with a match. The cone caught fire and blazed for a second, before being blown out by the hot breeze. The tip continued to glow like the ember it was, and the figure sat on its haunches and waited for the wisp of smoke emitted by the cone of incense to take effect.

It was not disappointed. In mere moments, a buxom red haired girl lay on the roof, and much to the small figure's delight, she was naked. The sight of so much bare flesh was too much for the diminutive figure, and it leapt at the girl with a shout of joy.

"SWEET-O!" the clarion call resounded through the night. It was followed a short second later by a feminine scream of disgust and rage, and then the sound of something small flying through the air at high velocity.

And then�

"NNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!"

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Akane sat up in bed the second she heard Happosai's lusty cry. Her arms crossed over her chest and her knees drew up in an almost fetal position before she realized that the little pervert wasn't in her room. She listened intently as Ranma-chan screamed in revulsion and then kicked or punched Happosai into Low Earth Orbit. She was about to lie down again when the third cry to split the night reached her ears. This one held a tone of pure agony, and sent her flying out of bed, through the house, and outside.

She craned her neck to look up at the spot on the roof where Ranma usually tried to get some peaceful sleep. Her family joined her in a moment, bleary eyed, hair rumpled, yawning ferociously. Kasumi placed a soft hand on her youngest sister's shoulder. "Akane, what's going on?"

There was no time to answer, however, as they all caught sight of a naked and female Ranma-chan standing his full height and looking down on something at his feet in absolute horror. His hands were clapped tightly over his mouth and his eyes were as big as dinner plates.

Without realizing how she did it, Akane found herself on the roof beside the red haired martial artist. "Ranma!" she cried in alarm. "Is it a ca-�"

Her question died in her throat and her eyes grew almost as wide as her companion's when she saw what the other had been staring at.

Ranma-kun finally levered himself off of his elbows, his expression completely different from that of the redhead standing next to him. He stood to his full height and gazed down at her. There was nothing but joy on his face at the sight, and he grabbed Akane by the shoulders and spun her around in triumph.

"I'M CURED!" He nearly screamed in ecstasy at the realization. "I'M FINALLY CURED FOR GOOD!!!"

At last the stress became too much, and Ranma-chan fainted.

The only other sound in the neighborhood was a phrase of two words that pretty much summed it all up.

"Oh, my!"

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The first thing that you noticed about the restaurant upon walking in was the smell of exotic spices. It swirled through the nose like heavy, dark orange koi slid through water. The second thing you noticed, after your eyes adjusted to the dimmer lighting, was the color red. It dominated everywhere - in geometric designs woven into the carpeting, in large panels on the walls, and on the thick pillars that stood sentry in the corners. After that, one usually noticed the lavender-haired waitress bouncing cheerily throughout the establishment, catching bowls full of soup or noodles and placing them before customers without spilling anything. If one cared to pull one's eyes from the ample bosom of the cheery waitress to find the source of the flying delicacies, one would then discover a wizened old woman perched like some sort of human cross between a vulture and a preying mantis over bubbling kettles of food.

It was directly to the wrinkled crone that Nabiki Tendo headed, her face and body language determined. As she approached, Cologne let herself dwell on the pitiable fact that Nabiki Tendo had no warrior skills. Those would, if combined with her razor-sharp intelligence and observant nature, be skills well worth considering recruiting into the Amazon tribe. For a second, the elder weighed the possibility of making the offer anyway. After all, a strong woman was a worthy one, and physical attributes aside Nabiki Tendo was as strong as they came.

The sharp-faced girl slapped something contained in a zip-locked plastic bag onto the counter. "What can you tell me about this?"

There was an understanding between the two of them. In return for tutoring in Chinese and information on any artifact, herb, or curse that Nabiki could bring before her, Cologne received accurate information on the state of Ranma Saotome's relationship with Nabiki's younger sister Akane. This included any activities the two were participating in together, whether of their own making or those forced upon them by others.

Cologne peered intently at the black cone of incense contained in the bag. It had crumbled just a little bit, but looked mainly like charcoal.

"It's incense." She replied.

Nabiki just raised an eyebrow at her. "I know that, elder. But what I don't know is how it does what it does, and what we can do to reverse the effects."

Cologne picked up the bag, opened it, and whiffed the scent tentatively. Her eyes widened momentarily, and then she began to grind her teeth. "Where did you get this, child?!" She was so livid that her face was actually pinking up from the ghastly pale color that it usually was.

"Happosai paid us a visit last night."

"Oh, no�" Cologne breathed.

"What?!" Nabiki's grip on the edge of the counter tightened. Her face became smooth and utterly unreadable.

"This is� it's a curse divider."

"It's not the same stuff he used on Ranma before, is it? Last time that happened the female Ranma that came out was some kind of vampire. This time -"

"This time she's not evil. She has all of the memories, personality traits and flaws, feelings and abilities that the male Ranma does. They are essentially the same person in two bodies - cursed, and not cursed.

"It is a tool we use only in time of great need. In the past when warriors were needed for the tribe this incense was used. Men were sent to the Spring of Drowned Woman, and the curse would be divided. This should never have gotten into the hands of that letch! It was locked in a safe and hidden. I am the only one that knows where it is and how to enter it. I don't know how Happosai found it." Her eyes narrowed. "We will have words."

Nabiki nearly shivered at the intensely cold gaze the old woman leveled at the incense in her weathered old palm. She did not want to be Happosai when Cologne caught up to him. "So how can we reverse this? Ranma-kun couldn't be happier about it, but Ranma-chan is about to have a nervous breakdown. She was so agitated we had to have Genma knock her out."

A long moment of silence passed before Cologne looked up at the girl. "I think I should break the news in person."

In the Tendo residence a small party of worried onlookers gazed at the nearly comatose form of Ranma-chan. His pretty face was screwed up in agitation even while he was unconscious, and his small hands were balled into iron-hard fists. On occasion a murmur passed his bee-stung lips. Kasumi, Akane, Tendo Soun, and Ranma's parents looked on in worry. The sixth person there was Ranma-kun, who divided his time between casting worried looks at his now completely cursed counterpart, and wringing a washcloth drenched in cold water over his head.

"Never gonna be a girl again!" he sang softly to himself.

Akane crossed her arms, glaring at him over Ranma-chan's body. "I can't believe how insensitive you're being. How would you feel if this were you lying here? You should have a little heart, Ranma."

"Mmm," her father hummed. "She's right. As good a fortune as this may be for you, boy, Ran�ma�ko? Er, Ranma-chan, here, is probably in Hell. It is our responsibility to find a way to make herrrrr, er, him? Er, make �him� feel better about his situation." He sweated a little at the confusing gender crisis before him. In the long run he decided that female body or no, Ranma Saotome was still himself, and thoroughly a young man.

"Indeed," Genma nodded at his old friend. "What better way to do that than have a celebration?" He smacked a fist into his palm. "In fact, what better excuse for a celebration than for you and Akane to�"

Soun chimed in and the two finished the sentence in harmony. "GET MARRIED!"

Nodoka Saotome leveled a chilling glare at her husband while Kasumi frowned slightly at her father. Akane rolled up one sleeve in preparation for an awesome punch, and Ranma-kun was already drawing back his fist.

Soun and Genma wisely decided to leave the room.

"Really," Kasumi said to Nodoka of the departed fathers. "You would think they'd have more sense after what happened last time."

Akane was looking at Ranma's mother when a sudden horrifying thought occurred to her. "Mrs. Saotome�" she began, but trailed off. She wasn't sure how to finish her thought, but her face had drained.

Nodoka leaned forward. "What is it, dear?"

Akane swallowed, looked over at Ranma-kun, and then down at Ranma-chan. "What� I mean, the contract!" She blurted.

Kasumi, Akane, and Ranma-kun fell silent at this and turned to look at Nodoka.

Ranma had turned slightly green. "You wouldn't make him commit seppuku, would you, mother?" he asked, referring to Ranma-chan.

Nodoka's mouth turned down at the corners and her eyebrows drew up and together slightly. "No, I would not. Once I had established your manliness, even despite this curse, I burned the contract. It no longer dictates our lives or your death. You and Ranko needn't worry over that."

It was then that Ranma-chan decided to wake up. He bolted from his prone position into a sitting one; the thick, bright red rope of his pigtail whipping about to settle heavily over his shoulder. The end of it made a small curl that lay just above the swell of his breast. Akane squirmed uncomfortably at the realization, for the millionth time, of just how unconsciously female Ranma was in this body. She still thought of him as a man, and knew that whatever he looked like he could be nothing but. Still, there were times when he would hold his head or his hands in a certain way, or shift the weight of his body that for a fleeting moment made it seem as if a whole and natural girl was there.

The first face that he saw was Akane's, and for a moment nothing but stark panic was evident in his expression. Then his eyes caught sight of his mother and his face smoothed until he looked only minimally concerned. For a moment, Ranma-kun was shocked to see the transformation. Was he so uncomfortable around his own mother that he was afraid to show his true emotions to her? The image of a brightly polished and expertly sharpened katana flashed through his mind and he repressed a shudder. Yes, he was.

Ranma-kun's wet washcloth decided to take that moment and drip onto the polished wood floor. Ranma-chan turned her head and looked squarely into the face of his rightful body. His shoulders sagged, and he sighed. "So, it's true then. I really am stuck like this."

"Hey, buddy, it's ok, I mean, the old ghoul is bound to know a way to fix this. Right?" Ranma-kun tried to sound upbeat, but couldn't quite pull it off.

Ranma-chan just looked at the cold, sopping washcloth, struggling to hide his dismay. "Sure," he said softly. "She's bound to."

It wasn't long before Cologne and Nabiki showed up, faces grim on both of them. Both of the Ranma's stood up anxiously at the crone's arrival and said in unison "So can you fix this?"

Cologne visibly digested the scene before her. Ranma split into two beings - one cursed, the other not cursed. She hopped down from her staff before motioning for everyone to sit. "I am afraid I have some rather difficult news." She watched as Ranma-chan's face filled with dread at her pronouncement, but continued before he could say anything. "But first let me explain what happened to you. This incense is a very ancient and - until tonight - well-guarded secret of the Amazon Tribe. It has never, to my knowledge, been used outside of China. Its properties are such that once used there is only one way to reverse the effects, and that way is most difficult, and perilous.

"In the beginning of the Amazon tribal nation there was much war between our peoples and those of outlying villages. Others sought to gain what we had through battle. This is a large part of the reason we are who we are today. But of course, war is a demanding mistress, and many of our warriors died. It came to be so bad at one point that this incense was concocted to help our people recoup our numbers. Oh, sure, there was always recruitment of poor women from patriarchal societies, but they could usually only be trusted to a certain extent. We were desperate, and in that desperation we sent our battle-trained men to the Spring of Drowned Girl, and used this incense to separate the curse, thus doubling our numbers quickly and with absolutely loyal results. These 'Twin Warriors' were given much, and treated well, and they were the salvation of our people. I sent for this single cone after Taro showed up. I thought that it could be useful in the most extreme of circumstances. One whiff of this and Taro would be split from his minotaur form. In the ensuing confusion and distress it would be a simple matter to finish the monster off permanently, leaving only the boy. Little did I know that Happosai would pervert its original use. To think - that disgusting excuse of a human thought he could make a love-slave out of Ranma's female side!"

The entire room, especially the two Ranma's, blanched and looked ill for a moment.

"But it matters not," she resumed her soliloquy. "The fact is that only once in the history of the Amazon people has there ever been a re-merge of a split curse. That was a life or death situation, and cannot easily be duplicated."

Ranma-kun clenched a fist. "I don't care how hard it is. I've been thinkin', and if it was me that was a girl permanently�" He fell silent for a second, unsure if that wasn't exactly the case. "Anyway, I wouldn't want to be stuck as a girl forever. I would do anything to get back to bein' a girl just half the time instead." He looked at his other self. "Even if it means giving up my cure, I won't let you� me� us stay this way forever."

Relief washed over Ranma-chan's face and he bowed to his male half gratefully. "You all already know I'll do whatever it takes to get back to normal. Well, as normal as I was, at least."

Cologne smiled bitterly at them. "It is good that you both feel this way, as that is the one factor of the solution to this mess that must be absolute. Neither one of you can be hesitant for a moment, or it simply will not work."

All eyes turned to Ranma-kun, who was staring at his hands in his lap. "Ranma-kun," Akane began softly. "Can you�?"

He looked up at her, his blue-gray eyes flashing, and then cut a quick glance at Ranma-chan. "Yes, I can. I know how I would feel if it were me. It's gotta happen." He looked at Cologne again, his gaze fierce. "When can we do this?"

"As soon as you marry Shampoo," she replied promptly.

There was dead silence in the room for a full minute. Ranma-chan's face drained of blood. Ranma-kun simply gaped at her, and Akane and Nabiki gasped.

Nodoka sat up straighter and looked at Cologne. She no longer carried the family katana, but the steel in her eyes was just as deadly. "I do not take kindly to your attempts to force my son into something which he obviously has no desire to do, elder."

Cologne assesed her for a moment more before grinning slightly. "Oh? I am pleased to finally meet the mother of my son-in-law. I am Cologne, Elder of the Joketsuzoku. Ranma defeated my great-grand-daughter in honorable combat, and as such the laws of our people demand that Shampoo take him as her husband."

"I am Nodoka Saotome, mother of Ranma Saotome, and my husband has already pledged our son's hand in marriage to Akane Tendo. This agreement was made long before my husband and son visited your land, indeed, before my son was yet conceived, and therefore takes precedence. Also, we are not in China, we are in Japan, and your laws do not apply here."

Cologne waved her withered old hand. "Amazon laws apply to wherever there are Amazons. Would you give up your samurai code of honor if you were in China? Besides, I have heard these arguments before. Nothing you can say will make us change our minds."

"Is there no way of working out a compromise, then?"

There was a lengthy pause while Cologne considered. "Compromise is said by some to be for the weak." Nodoka raised an eyebrow and the elder continued. "However, wise women such as myself see the merits of such arrangements. What would you have in mind?"

Nodoka hesitated. "As I am not familiar with the laws or needs of your people, I would not venture such a suggestion. I am sure you can make one, and I will consider it in turn."

Kasumi, Akane, the two Ranmas, and especially Nabiki, were watching this exchange raptly. Nabiki was even leaning forward, eyes narrowed, as if to absorb everything.

Cologne pinched her chin thoughtfully. "There are a couple of things I can think of. One of them is if Ranma were to simply give Shampoo a child. Even bringing one strong child into the tribe would be acceptable."

Ranma-kun and Ranma-chan both chimed at the same time "NO WAY! I could never abandon my child!" They looked at each other in surprise.

Nodoka raised her hand in a placating manner. "Hush, children. Elder, I have suggested this to him before and he seems most disinclined to the idea. Perhaps another suggestion?"

Cologne pursed her lips. "If this merging of the curse does not work, I will accept Ranma-chan as a warrior into the tribe of the Amazons. This way you get your son, we get our strong addition to the people, and Ranma-chan gets an assured position in life as a valuable member of society. Shampoo will be a bit disappointed, but she'll get over it."

Nodoka considered this. "You are asking me to give up my child. Honored elder, Ranma has been away from me for the last ten years. In that time my husband did not deign it necessary to send me a photograph of him, or even detailed information on his well-being. At best I received infrequent post-cards. Because of this curse he and his father have been hiding themselves from me until just a few months ago� It would seem that they endeavored to keep the burden of such a truth from my shoulders.

"I am certain that having been a mother yourself you know how precious a woman's children are. Being a mother to Ranma, however distant, is what made me a complete woman�" She trailed off for a few seconds, slightly embarrassed at having stated such a fact. "I would not wish to part with him so soon after reuniting. Even if he is cursed, he is still my son, and I love him." Nodoka let her hand rest on Ranma-chan's shoulder. "Imagine what it would be like for me, to have not had my child for ten years, and now to have two children." Her hand fell back into her lap. "Do not ask me to give him up. There must be some way of everyone walking away from this with honor, besides that of having Ranma leave me?"

Cologne began to respect this woman. She was well-spoken and confident, if too submissive. She was willing to fight for the happiness of her son, but still recognized the importance of honor. "You are a brave woman, to barter so with the Amazons. But our Laws cannot be dismissed. The entire purpose of them is our survival, and we can only survive by remaining strong. If Ranma gave the Tribe a child we would gain that strength. If the merge failed and Ranma-chan was adopted into our people we would gain that strength. If Shampoo takes him as her husband we would gain the most. It would seem that we are at an impasse."

It was then that Nabiki spoke up. "May I suggest something, Cologne?"

Cologne turned her narrowed eyes at the middle Tendo sister. "What do you have on your mind, little one?"

Nabiki leaned to one side and rested her weight on her hand. "If the purpose of your laws is to make the Tribe stronger, then am I to assume that if circumstances are right you follow the spirit of the law rather than the letter?" Cologne nodded and Nabiki continued. "Obviously Ranma doesn't want to marry Shampoo. Honor has placed obligations on him that require him to marry Akane, and even Ukyo has a better claim than your great-granddaughter. Besides, her bimbo-glomp thing scares him more than anything else. I think we all know that she's a bit too� enthusiastic for him to handle."

"Hey!" Ranma-kun protested. Every real female in the room shot him an exasperated look and he sank back onto his heels, face red. "I'll just sit here and be quiet, now."

"All this time," Nabiki continued, "With everything she's tried, Shampoo is no closer to being Ranma's wife than you are. But if the whole purpose of the law is to gain strength for the Amazons, why don't you try to gain him and all of the power he represents as allies?"

Cologne let herself blink. " 'All of the power he represents'?" she asked.

"Ranma stands to inherit this dojo. A million yen says that he and Akane have at least three kids. Ranma is related to or friends with, let's see," she began counting off on her fingers. "Genma, Soun, Ryoga, Ukyo, Tofu, Karumi, Natsume� at least a dozen very powerful martial artists. With all of this extended family hanging around no one in his or her right mind would want to seriously piss him off." She glibly ignored the fact that the dojo was attacked by this or that glory/revenge seeking martial artist on an almost weekly basis. "Cologne, we all read the papers. China isn't exactly a hot place to be, right now, what with this government overthrowing that one every five or ten years. How long will it be until one of them decides to make patriots out of all of you mountain people?

"You have to realize that taking Ranma against his will - and it will never be any other way - will gain you nothing but very powerful enemies. On the other hand, cutting your losses now just may gain you more strength in the long run." Nabiki smiled wickedly. "You could even do some kind of child-exchange martial-arts program and trade your kids between here and there for training."

Everyone in the room was staring open-mouthed at Nabiki (Except for Kasumi and Nodoka, who merely placed their finger-tips to their lips and widened their eyes in an expression of shock). Ranma-kun blinked rapidly and asked "How long have you been thinking about this?"

Nabiki shrugged. "I just came up with it. What can I say? I'm brilliant."

Cologne stared into space, her staff soaring high above her head. Visions of Ranma's children arriving in the village to learn Amazon techniques, and her own heirs gleaning martial knowledge from Ranma's tutelage danced through her head. Shampoo would be disappointed, but Nabiki was right. The only real recourse she and her great-granddaughter had left to them was kidnapping Ranma, which would inevitably lead to a rescue squad of angry and very talented martial artists. Not to mention that the prize would seek freedom often and very likely violently. In the war to win Ranma's hand in marriage Shampoo came in third place, and Akane had practically already won. After all, hadn't Ranma killed a godling for her? The memory of Mousse's report of the incident made her shiver. Yes, perhaps it was a good idea to keep him as an ally, rather than a prisoner.

"Of course," the Amazon said to Ranma's mother, "Shampoo will be hard to convince. She really thinks she loves the young fool. But, Ranma would never make a proper husband� and he would make an excellent ally. Do you agree to young Nabiki's take on things?"

Nodoka was smiling in relief. "Oh, certainly! She does credit to her father."

"Then it is agreed. You and I will meet tomorrow to discuss the arrangements of this alliance between the Saotomes and the Amazons. Ah, do not bother to bring your husband. He has made enough of a mess of his son's life as it is."

Nodoka bowed. "I would be delighted to meet with you, elder. The Nekohanten at around four?"

Cologne nodded. "That would be fine." She perched her staff against her shoulder and rubbed her hands together. "Now, on with the cure. Kasumi, do you have any willow bark?"

In the Tendo family dojo all of the men - except for Ranma-kun - had been exiled to the house. Three concentric circles made of cherry-sized stones rested in the center of the broad, well-kept floor. Corresponding to the four directions were sprigs of different kinds of plants, each tied to a small piece of willow bark with dark yellow thread. In the very center of the circles Ranma-chan and Ranma-kun stood side-to-side, not touching, facing east. Akane was blushing and trying not to peek when anyone noticed. Ranma-kun's face was bright red, his eyes squeezed shut. His shoulders were tense and he kept trying to cover himself with his hands.

Cologne eyed the two bodies in the middle of the circle and the proceeded with her instructions. "I will begin reading from the scroll. I will complete the scroll, and there will be a bright light. When you can no longer stand to see it, the two of you must step into each other. Your bodies will merge, and that will be that. Once the light has died the two of you will be one. You will feel greatly fatigued. Sleep and lots of water are recommended. Shall we begin?"

Everyone nodded, and Cologne unrolled the scroll and began to read.

The words issuing from her wrinkled lips were not Chinese, or Japanese, or any other language any of them recognized. The syllables were spoken nasally and there was a twang to them. There was an oily quality about them that made it impossible to remember exactly what any one word sounded like, as if the words themselves chose to be spoken and then hide away from memory again. It made Ranma-chan's ears involuntarily pull back against her skull, and sent a shiver down his spine. Cologne stopped and tiredly raised her small hand.

They turned from Akane to face Cologne, who raised the scroll again and began chanting in that same slippery language. As Cologne chanted, Ranma-chan looked into the face of his male body, saw the determination there, and the selflessness. He knew what his other half was thinking - after all, it was his own brain at work. He was thinking that it wasn't fair for Ranma-chan to have gotten the short end of the stick like that. He was imagining himself in the same situation, and shuddering at the thought. He was feeling honor-bound to re-assume the curse, to fix what had gone wrong the only way he could. He was scared, but nothing in him thought twice about the chosen course of action. He would go through with it. He would sacrifice his cure - his happiness - to help the fully-cursed half of himself.

And then he saw Akane's face, her large brown eyes staring at the two of them raptly. Her face was full of hope, and fear, and wonder. She was so achingly beautiful that it cut him to the quick.

Doubts stirred in Ranma-chan's mind. Was it fair to her? Everything in Akane's life had been subject to chaos from practically the moment Ranma and his father had arrived. Nothing was spared - her social life, her school life, and her home life - even her future had been thrown into turmoil because of him. After the Jusendo adventure Ranma had come to terms with the fact that he loved Akane. He loved her so much it almost hurt, and they both already silently accepted the fact that they would marry each other. Ranma knew it, and he knew that Akane did, too.

Was it fair to subject her to a husband that would always be less then a full man? How would their children turn out, having a father who was a woman half the time? Who would they call mother? Here was his best chance to make her happy, to help her be that much closer to a normal life.

A normal life� for Akane.

In that instant Ranma-chan made up his mind. When faced with the decision before, he had always chosen Akane's well-being and happiness over his own, no matter how great the concession. A flash of light surrounded the two figures. Nodoka had to shield her eyes. Akane squinted, trying to see what was happening, until tears streamed down her cheeks from the stress of it, and she too had to look away. Cologne merely closed her eyes until the unbearable shine dissipated.

Nothing had changed. Akane gasped loudly at the sight of Ranma-chan and Ranma-kun standing next to each other, still completely separate beings.

Ranma-chan's expression went through a range of emotions even through the tears that streaked his face and dripped from his chin to darken the polished wood floor. He turned from his fully male counterpart and strode to Akane, looking up at the now-taller girl. "I hope you understand why I couldn't do it," he told her in a voice that throbbed with emotion. Then he leaned forward and grasped her shoulders before pressing his cheek to hers. He whispered something that only she could hear, and then before anyone could react, he was gone.

Chapter Two
Ukyo

He did not even stop by his old room for clothes or the meager stash of money hidden there. He took to the roofs, naked, glad that the new moon shed no light on the shameful state of his female body. He ran over the tiles and occasional tin roof without caring about the small scrapes and cuts that penetrated the thick calluses of his soles.

There was something in him that thought that he should be breathing heavily, raggedly. That the recent events that left him in this soft body - this woman's body - should have robbed him of the ability to run this smoothly. But he had trained his mind and body in the martial art since he was able to crawl. He had perfected the speed, stamina, agility and strength of his cursed form since the day he attained it, almost a year and a half ago. It would not betray him now.

A wide alley yawned between two houses and he gathered his muscles to make the jump. For an instant he knew that it would be supremely easy to just miss the landing. He imagined himself falling, letting his body go slack and resisting the urge to flip in the air like an acrobat. He knew he could do it. It would be so easy to just end it all. After all, he was the only loose end. His other half was male, Akane would be happy. Shampoo and Cologne and Mousse would go back to China with a contract of alliance with the Saotome clan, and they would be content. His father would no doubt forget about the female half having ever been a problem, and his mother would have her manly son. Ukyo would have her restaurant, and she would eventually accept the decision he had already made, about Akane, and about this giving up.

Then the reality of his last thought hit him. To fall would be to give up. It would be contrary to everything he believed in, everything he held close to his heart and everything he had been taught. Even the Saotome Secret Technique of Running Away was not completed until you came back and finished the fight. He had never given up in his life. He would not - could not - start now.

His muscles stretched and he sailed across the empty space like a deer. His feet connected solidly with the rough pitted surface of the opposite roof and he kept running.

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Ukyo had closed the restaurant hours ago and busied herself with reading in bed until her eyes began to droop with weariness. Her fingers were on the lamp switch to turn out the light when she heard a tap at her window. The unexpected sound combined with the late hour sent a shiver down her spine. She grabbed a fistful of throwing spatulas and cautiously moved the curtain aside.

A small, white, very forlorn face looked back at her, the features upside down. Ukyo let her heart return to it's normal rhythm before taking a deep breath and opening the window. Ranma, holding on to the edge of the roof for his impromptu pose, swung his body over and into the room. He landed in the middle of the floor, his small bare body hunched into itself. His feet were dirty and covered in tiny punctures and cuts. He crossed his arms over his breasts and looked up at her, the expression utterly dejected.

"By the gods, Ran-chan, are you ok?" Ukyo knelt next to him and stretched out her arms instinctively.

A sob tore out of his throat and he fell into her embrace. He buried his face into the side of her neck, clutched at her shoulders, and howled in agony.

A part of her ached for him, shared in his sorrow. In her hard life, the rejection she'd gone through from her friends, her father, her schoolmates, Ukyo had come to know sorrow intimately. She'd learned to use it as fuel, and turned some of the feelings of rejection into anger. This dark, simmering anger had driven her to practice the specialized martial art of her family for all of her formative years. In her village no one could touch her, and she'd liked it that way. It gave her more time to brood about the revenge she would exact on the cause of all of her suffering - Genma Saotome and his son Ranma, the fianc� who had rejected her.

After she had tracked the wandering pair to Nerima and spent some of her earnings to travel there, she'd discovered that despite her years of hard training she was not Ranma's equal in martial ability - not by half. To continue to try to kill or maim or even touch him would be fruitless and stupid. So after he told her that she was cute a new plan formed - She would make him fall in love with her, and she would ultimately reject him, thus subjecting him to the pain she'd experienced for most of her life.

But it hadn't worked out that way. The hate she fostered for him, nursing in her darkest hours and making a part of her, had turned to honest friendship. She had resided in Nerima for less than two months before Kuonji Ukyo came to terms with something that would change her life forever. She was head over heels in love with Ranma Saotome.

And it was half that time that before she realized that Ranma Saotome was in love with another woman.

Akane was mean to him. She yelled, hit him, spurned him and didn't trust him. She repeatedly denied that she loved him. She was engaged to him through a pact made by their two fathers that proceeded even hers in timeline.

Nabiki had told her everything that happened to Ranma before Ukyo had arrived on the scene, including a recap of his arrival in Nerima. She had been detailed, and honest, and after she'd walked away with her payment Ukyo was left to stew over that fact that Ranma had seen Akane naked and had� reacted�

So Ukyo was left with trying underhanded ways of getting her Ran-chan to see that Akane was all wrong for him. After all, they were only sixteen. It wouldn't be too long before he realized that his infatuation with the Tendo girl was silly. Then he would turn to his oldest friend - her, Ukyou Kuonji, and he would realize what a terrific girl she'd been all that time, and he would fall in love with her. Then Akane would end up with Ryoga, or something, Kodachi would be committed to an asylum. Those Chinese gaijin would go back to China where they belonged, and everyone would be happy.

So, even though Ranma was obviously in great distress at the moment, a small part of Ukyo rejoiced. She knew that one of the only things that could make him so distraught would be some kind of breaking away from Akane. If anyone in his family had been injured he wouldn't be here, he would be with the Tendos or in the hospital. The fact that he was here meant that this was her big chance to make her move.

When Ranma's wailing quieted to hiccoughs she reached for the blanket on her bed and drew it over his body. She moved the vivid red pigtail so that it rested outside the cover. She smoothed back his bangs and looked down in to his tear-filled, bright blue eyes. "Ran-chan, what happened?"

He told her of the incense, the alliance with the Amazons, and the merging spell that had failed because of his decision to give up his being a boy at least half the time again. He told her of how he found himself standing on her roof, unsure of how he arrived there.

"What are you going to do?" Ukyo asked him. "They're sure to come looking for you, and this will be the first place you'd go."

"Then let's leave! I can't see them again. I have to disappear." His eyes were desperate. "We could move the restaurant deeper into Tokyo. They'd never find us there! I would be a waitress for you - you know how much money I can bring in when I do that. We could make a killing."

Ukyo sat back on her heels, trying to ignore the discomfort in her knees, absorbing the magnitude of all he'd told her. He was asking her to go away with him, where all of their old friends and enemies would never find them again, and start a new life together. Ukyo had only dreamed of this contingency� but moving was a huge step. Just finding a restaurant that they could use at a reasonable price would be a miracle by itself. Perhaps if she had Tsubasa run the U-Chan and send her the extra money after the bills and his salary had been paid, they wouldn't have to completely drain the nest egg she'd been saving� Her cousin had mentioned something about her friend leaving for a scholarship in Germany for the summer. Supposedly she hadn't found any acceptable boarders for her one-bedroom apartment�

Ranma read her hesitation wrong. "It's because I'm stuck as a girl, isn't it? Now that I'm no longer a guy you can't stand to look at me." He stood like all of his limbs weighed as much as the world, and started for the window.

Ukyo latched onto his ankle from her kneeling position on the floor. "Wait, Ran-chan! That wasn't it at all. Moving is a giant big deal in Tokyo. In case you haven't noticed our great country is made of a chain of small islands. Land space is at a premium - especially Tokyo land space. Do you have any idea what kind of money I paid for this dump?" She had his attention now so she released him. "It's just going to take a lot of maneuvering, that's all. You stay here and get dressed - dresser's over there - I'm going to go downstairs and make some phone calls. I'll be back up when I can. If you want, you can start packing what you think I'll need. We can send for the rest later." She stood and kissed his forehead. "Don't worry, Ranma-honey; I'll take care of you."

She went downstairs and shook Tsubasa awake and quickly swore him to secrecy before outlining her plan. The pretty little ninja nodded and set to the task she'd given him.

An hour and a half later it was done. Ukyo called up her cousin and asked her if her friend's apartment was still open for the summer. It was, at a rental price that sent Ukyo's eyebrows climbing - but at least it wouldn't require the twelve month deposit that some places did. The girl had planned to leave the very next morning, and there was even an American food joint nearby that was advertising for waiters. If they got there soon they were bound to get a job.

Tsubasa pressed a reasonably heavy cloth-bound bundle into her hands and bowed to her, his soft eyes brimming with tears at this sudden departure. "Don't worry," he told her in his gentle voice. "I'll keep this place running for you, and I won't tell anyone where you've gone."

She touched his shoulder. "I know I can count on you."

Ukyo went upstairs and found Ranma dressed in one of her pairs of black tights and an off-white tee-shirt. He was without a bra but his feet bore an old pair of Ukyo's basic black slippers. They were too big, but Ranma didn't seem to mind.

His face was still red and his eyes were puffy, proving that he'd been crying while she was downstairs. "I packed enough clothes for both of us," he told her. "And your toothbrush an' stuff from the bathroom. I left some space for whatever else you want."

Ukyo nodded to him and went to her dresser where she swept up a few photographs and knick-knacks that she never when anywhere without. Five minutes later they were on the road.

They paid cash for train tickets deeper into the city, and soon arrived. Ukyo briefed Ranma on what would be going on.

"My cousin Aoi has a friend who won a scholarship to study in Germany for the summer. She lives in an apartment by herself, and her landlady told her to find someone to occupy the space or she would find someone for her. She left most of the furniture there, so the rent is kind of steep, but we can swing it. She lives just a few minutes walk from a small restaurant district. It won't be like working at U-Chan's, but I know I can get a job as a chef and you can get one as a waiter."

"Waitress," Ranma said quietly. "As far as anyone there knows, I'm just your average female." His voice was loaded with depression.

In an attempt to lighten the mood she poked one of his breasts. "Ranma, whatever body you're in I promise you no one is going to think you're an average anything." When that provoked no response she bit her lip and then continued. "Well, the place only has one bedroom, and a kitchenette, but it's a fairly new building so it has its own bathroom. We won't have to share the facilities with half the building, thank the kamis."

He turned to her then. "U-chan, how are you affording all of this?"

Ukyo felt herself blush a little. "Well, I had a little money saved up. You know, for a rainy day. I figured that this kind of fit the bill."

He nodded. "It was a nest egg, wasn't it?"

Ukyo stared at him, and then lowered her eyes. "�Yes, it was. I was hoping to have something to offer you when we�"

He raised his hand to cut her off. "U-chan� Ukyo. I love Akane." The words slipped from his mouth without hesitation, without dramatic pauses. "I've loved her since the second day I knew her, when I watched her hold her own against half of the male population of Furinkan High. I love her so much, I� U-chan, I killed a man for her! I've given up my last chance for a cure for her! Look at me!" He gestured furiously at his body, at the breasts that stood proudly from his ribs, at the hips that swelled sensuously from an hourglass waist only to taper into well-shaped legs and tiny feet. "I'm in the body of a woman! What kind of a husband could I possibly be to her, even if I'm only this way half of the time?! It's nuts! No one should have to put up with this! I� I couldn't let that happen to her." He breathed heavily for a few seconds, his eyes tortured. "She is the only one I would have done this for, Ukyo. Not Shampoo, not my mother, not even you. I love her so much that I gave up my one chance of normalcy for her happiness, even if it is with 'another man'!" The words tasted bitter on his tongue.

He stopped, and Ukyo knew that he was waiting for her to say something. The words swirled around in her head, bouncing off of her skull, echoing in her ears. He had said that he loved Akane. There was no question of the words, she had been watching his lips as they issued them. Something small inside her broke and turned to ash and the tears came to her eyes and spilled over. But I love you, she wanted to cry. You're supposed to love me back and we'll live happily together. We'll have a couple of kids and raise them up to be fine Okonomiyaki cooks and martial artists both. But those words would not come. Instead she said; "You killed a man?"

A hard look came into his eyes. "Well," he hesitated. "Sort of. I mean, he came back again. To life, I mean. And he wasn't really a man; he was a god. Well, sort of. It's kinda complicated." He sighed and passed a hand over his eyes. "I'll tell you about it sometime. Right now I just wanted you to know that I love Akane. I mean I really love her, and I want her to be happy. That's why I did this. Don't think that I'm just going to suddenly realize that I love you an' wanna marry you because you've been such a great pal, and all. I mean, you have been great. Really great, and you're my best friend. But right now there's just no point in you trying anything. Aside from the fact that I'm stuck in this body," his voice was bitter at that point, "I just couldn't see you as anything else but my best friend, ok?"

"So," she said, her voice thick with the tears she was trying to stop. "You're telling me that you just need a friend right now? That anything else would be futile on my part and too confusing for you to deal with after everything that's just happened?"

He blinked a couple of times. "Well, yeah. That's exactly it." Relief passed over his face. "You know, I was kinda afraid that you'd be really upset and toss me out on my ear."

Ukyo passed the back of her wrist over her eyes and cheeks, wiping away the tears and their tracks. "Hey, I wouldn't do that to you in your greatest time of need. I mean, what are pals for?" She forced a smile onto her face. It felt stiff and fake. If all he wanted right now was a friend, then she would be the best friend he ever had, and if later he needed something more, then she would be that, too. To Ukyo it was a failure, but she saw hope in her situation, and right now it was all she had. She clung to it desperately.

After that the silence was awkward, and they both turned to the window of the nearly-deserted train car that they were in to watch the city whip past them.

Chapter Three
Tokyo

It was only a short time later that they departed at their designated stop. The usher wished them a good night, and Ranma picked up the suitcase before Ukyo could make a grab for it. They came to stand under a station lamp-post and she looked at the piece of paper in her hands. "It's quite a ways from here," she told him, her voice hushed because it was early, and the looming darkness invited furtive tones and actions, and pressed in on the yellow light of the electric bulbs like some great smothering pillow. "We should probably take a cab there so we don't get lost."

The called a cab, and in half an hour they were seated inside. The driver, a grizzled man in his late fifties, wore a jaded expression and did not ask them any questions beyond the obligatory "Where to, ladies?" He delivered them to their stop, collected his fare, and drove away.

The apartment building was a twenty story gray affair, about fifteen years old. It had been built as a student housing option for the nearby graduate school of Tsunayimatsu, of which Aoi's friend Ami attended. They were buzzed in by a sleepy landlady who wanted to know why they were arriving so early in the morning. Ukyo made some excuse about cheaper travel at odd times, and the landlady nodded and introduced herself as Mrs. Kobiyashi. They were, she informed them, to keep noise levels at an absolute minimum. She didn't want to hear any of that obnoxious new rock music, or any of that gaijin crap from America. If anyone else moved in he or she would have to pay their own rent. She expected them to keep a clean place, too. If they ever attracted mice or so help her roaches� Mrs. Kobiyashi trailed off and only glared at them menacingly.

Mrs. Kobiyashi led them to the twelfth floor, apartment 1203, and knocked on the door.

A young woman of about twenty-one or twenty-two answered, smiled gently at Mrs. Kobiyashi, and then ushered them in and shut the door.

The girl bowed politely. "Hello, my name is Ami." She had a heart-shaped face and wide blue eyes behind reading glasses. Her short hair hung to just below her ears, and was a dark blue, almost black color. There was a calm, self-possessive air about her that reminded Ranma very much of Kasumi. At the same time the intelligence in her eyes shone unmistakably. Her build was athletic and curvy, and while she was very reserved in her motions and traditional in the ways that she stood and sat and served tea, there was something about her that told the world that she was quite capable of taking care of herself.

She showed them to a low table in the main room of the apartment and was serving them tea. "I hope you'll enjoy your stay here, Ukyo, Ranma. I took pains to remove everything of mine that was personal except for the furniture and the dishes. These you can use. Feel free to hang any pictures you want, just be sure to put any nails in during the day, or Mrs. Kobiyashi will hear complaints." She set the teapot in its designated place and inclined her head to Ukyo, letting her know that she was to drink first. "The neighbors to the left are the Wabare's. They just had their first baby, a little girl. Her name is Ayumi, isn't that sweet? To the right is Mr. Tomokone. He's terribly old, but he lives here because he's earning a degree in animal husbandry. He says that after forty years of selling insurance it was time he did something that always interested him. He's very wise, and kind, too, once you get to know him." She noticed that Ranma was looking at her strangely, and she tilted her head. "Yes?"

"You're a martial artist, aren't you?" He asked bluntly.

Ami smile at him. "Why yes I am, and so are you, am I correct?"

"Yeah," Ranma said. "I'm the heir to the Saotome School of Anything Goes Martial Arts. What do you study?"

"Oh," Ami set her cup down and folded her hands in her lap. "A little of this, a little of that. Most of what I know is self-taught."

This intrigued Ranma to no end. "Really? I've never heard of that, before. You hold yourself so well I thought for sure that you were at least a black belt in something. You must have been in a lot of fights to learn how to fight so well without a sensei." Then he realized how rude he'd been and blushed. "Er, sorry."

Ami flapped a hand in a dismissive gesture. "Oh, don't be. You're right, I have been in a lot of fights. But, not any more. At this point in my life the future is secure and I don't have to do it. I suppose that if I had to I could still throw a mean punch, but� well, it was all a long time ago."

Ami gave them the tour of her place. It was small, efficient, and very clean. In the bedroom there was an awkward pause over the futon before Ranma rolled his eyes. "Oh, go ahead and take it, U-chan," he said. "I'm used to sleeping on the floor." He placed his sack under the small square window that looked out into the small rectangular windows of the building across the narrow street.

Ami clasped her hands in front of her and tilted her head to one side. "Well, since you two have been traveling, I may as well leave. I'm glad you came today. I would hate to have left the place to perfect strangers for the summer."

Ukyo lowered herself to the bed gratefully. "Man, I am beat," she huffed quietly. "Ami, thank you so much for letting us rent the space."

"You're welcome," Ami told her. And then, "Ranma, would you see me to the door? I need to give you the key."

Ranma followed her out to the door, and she gave him the key. He locked her out, and stood alone in the living room for a long time.

Ukyo's voice floated out from the bedroom. "Ranma-honey? Are you coming to bed?"

A peculiar pain shot through him at those words. He knew that someday he had hoped to hear them from Akane. The image of Akane in her wedding dress beckoned to him. That small, secretive smile she wore and the way her eyes sparkled made his heart ache. Her voice had been so shy when he'd complimented her, and she'd blushed so prettily. And then they'd argued, as usual, and her face had come alive with fury and vitality, and he'd wanted to kiss her then, and he had come to know that she was the one for him, and that someday after he'd been cured they would be together always.

And now� Now he was cured, and Akane would have the man she deserved, and she would be happy. All that remained was the leftovers, the girl's body with a man's mind, but Akane wouldn't have to worry about that, not anymore.

He choked back the tears, amazed that he could still cry after all the weeping he'd already done. He quietly cleared his voice and called back to his childhood friend. "Yeah, Ukyo, I'll be right in."

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