One other thing I noticed about this that I might question.  In one
paragraph, these people in the shadows are described as not the ones who
made history, but the ones who plan it.  In a later paragraph, you call them
"the creators of history."  This seems a bit contradictory.  Perhaps another
phrase may be used.  For instance, since they plan, rather than make
history, maybe you could say, "the designers of history," or "the designers
of destiny."  "Manipulators of history" might also work.

~Apollo Racer



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