Suggested changes: {before : after}
Whatever you used to convert the file to ASCII text seemed to have a real
problem avoiding extra blank lines inside paragraphs. Mostly after first
lines since it appears to indent them a full tab stop and then wraps them
again. I have removed the indent from my copy to avoid even more wrapping
in the return email.
On Sun, 15 Sep 2002 13:02:41 -0800 Brian Randall <brian@azurite.org> wrote:
Diamonds in the Rough -- Chapter Four -- Can I Win?
Of course not. No matter who is asking.
"Aniki," Ranma supplied from his hiding spot behind Keitaro. "We worked
at your sister's dojo for a while."
Maybe "My aniki,"?
"There are lots of benefits! You and Keitaro can probably trade clothes
-- you couldn't do that {while you were seeing : with} a girl, now could you? Oh,
wait, I guess _you_ could...." Mitsune trailed off, frowning, and
touched a finger to her lips. "Err... anyhow, I just wanted to tell the
two of you that you have my full support, and that Keitaro was right; us
girls are all in good hands, because neither of you will ever take
advantage of us."
Mitsune struggled for the first few seconds, but quickly eased into the
contact, purring deeply. Keitaro blinked a few times, then covered his
nose with both hands and began to back away, while Tsuruko murmured,
"Oh, my," and placed a hand across Motoko's wide eyes.
Nice to see the tables turned on Mitsune occasionally.
"Uh-oh," Ranma mumbled, backing into a corner, as Keitaro marched out of
the room.
Did someone drop Ranma in a pit of starving girls too? Maybe he was
dropped in front of a department store wrapped in jewelry.
"You can hide behind me!" Mitsune suggested, winking at Ranma and
grinning widely.
I don't think that would help much.
Her head drooping, the girl slid the door to her room shut, leaving
Keitaro alone in the hall.
I know they were talking about different things, but I'm not sure what.
Happosai must be slipping if she had a pair of panties to wear.
Nodding to himself, he headed to a scroll on his wall, {rolling : rolled} it up, and
{stepping : stepped} into the passageway behind it. Most of the inner secrets of the
inn confused Keitaro, but he had learned one combination of passageways
fairly well -- enough to find an easy way onto the roof from his room.
The soft whisper of wind near him was the only warning he had, and he
froze, as Ranma flashed past him, a blur of concentrated motion and
force, passing within centimeters of Keitaro's form. A kick rocketed out
swiftly enough to crack the air, almost striking Keitaro's knee, and a
thrown punch stopped a {dozen : couple} centimeters from Keitaro's throat, the air
pressure from the blow nearly bowling him over.
She continued to walk forward in silence, thankful that they were nearly
home. Peeking around the bags in her hands, she was relieved to see the
foot of the long staircase leading up to the Hinata-Sou, and the much
thinner crowds so close to the hilltop. Soon, she would {be able to be : get}
home, {and :} put her own clothes back on, and promise her older sister that
whatever it was she had done, she would never do again.
"The Happosai is very dangerous," Suu agreed.
and not very delicious.
An angry battle cry rent the near-silence, and Keitaro suddenly vaulted
upwards, aided by a blow from Naru, and swiftly {disappearing : disappeared} over the
peak of the roof.
Ranma chuckled, shaking her head. "You're going to get really bored if
you don't let go, because I'm going to bed." She paused, considering,
then frowned. "And Motoko-chan might get the wrong idea. Again."
Still.
They did, however, ask him questions, nearly constantly, on what he
wanted done with the place, and it left him without a free moment to try
and speak with Naru. It wasn't until the men stopped for their lunch,
congregating in the {field : yard} to the side of the house, that they finally
left him alone.
Trudging tiredly up the stairs towards her room, he {deflated : was disappointed} to find her
gone from the inn. "Where did she go?" he mumbled tiredly, turning in
time to watch Motoko and her sister march down the hall, away from him.
"Hello?"
"I'm sure I will enjoy my stay," she {deferred : demured}, a smile playing about her
lips. "Motoko-chan is embarrassed, but I was wondering if you could show
us to the hotsprings that she has written to me about so often."
Tsuruko finally let up, clicking her tongue. Motoko fell heavily to the
ground, their arena being the same mid-stream island {she had challenged : where she had challenged Ranma},
and bounced on her rear end, wincing. "You've improved," the woman
finally admitted. "But all the same, I expected more from you."
Ranma shrugged absently, frowning. "Well," he said decisively, "tomorrow
is the first day of my new job, so I want to get ready. Night,
Kanrinin." With that, he trudged into the inn.
Forgive my spelling,
my U.S. education,
is the source of blame.
You don't have that much of a problem. Besides, that's what spel chekers
are for.