Max M wrote:

maybe i should include the post

Those are usually helpful.

  When I finally felt grass under me again, stationary and
slightly damp, I recognized the pure bone tiredness I had not felt in

think you can drop 'in'

since leaving behind Lanz Island and its rat infested bowels. My
cyc, my incredible red machine that had become more a part of me
than legs

than my legs (just sounds better to me.)

 was gone. Zig still had the Kawasaki Ninja he had stolen,

and he would probably lend it to me if he hadn't already sold it.

Yes, selling it might be a problem when trying to loan it out.

  Sitting up and brushing off my pants, I looked around and
saw the lower west side of my city, in the back yard of a solitary
house surrounded by taller buildings.

the whole lower west side fit in the backyard? (Wording seems awkward)

It was peacefully quiet and I

imagined that the residents were too afraid of the police to care
exactly who was trespassing. Navigating around the small forest of
plastic lawn-ornaments,

Lawn Gnomes. You have to specify them. :)

  Turning a corner and starting to head east, I saw head lights

headlights (One word, I think)

  A spot light

spotlight

  I raised my eyebrows. Not very many people knew me by
that name yet, and certainly not the cops. "Yeah, I'm Rick."

Indeed. Most unusual.

  The man walked toward me and I saw he had a small box
in his hand with a long antenna. "Good, I've been looking for you.
It's me."

  "Who?"

  "Me! Stitch!" He saw me reach into my jacket but said,
"No, no. I'm not gonna to kill you. And don't lie, I know you don't
have any guns. This bad boy is a metal detector too."

What, they don't manufacture plastic guns anymore?

themselves. But I obeyed, and I don't have to remind you how
much Chris needed to be stopped. Nevertheless, Arkoff was forced
to condemn my actions to the Mandate for public relations
purposes, and now I can't go back."

  I was surprised but said nothing.

I don't seem 'Rick' rolling over for that reason either. :)

  "I realize that I was picked because of my dedication to this
city and

city, and

  "Now I may not have done much to stop the riots or the
coup, but I can still save a whole mess of innocent people. City
Hall was built with an escape route that leads through a mile and a
half of underground tunnel to the Abrahms War Memorial. But
there is a whole platoon of gang boys with rocket weapons waiting
by the observatory nearby. As soon as they see people trying to
leave, they are going to blow that memorial back to the stone age
and kill everyone in it. Its

It's

just a matter of time before the civilians

find out about the tunnel and go get themselves slaughtered. I
know you aren't on my side, and I wont

won't

  "We have quite a file on you, Screw. I even know about
your little adventure in the Lanz Island Incarceration block. In fact
we both know I pretended not to see you back in your old
apartment building when Chris sent me to take you in a week
early. Remember the fire alarm? I let you go because if Chris had
gotten hold of you two weeks ago when you still didn't know
anything, he probably would have had to kill you himself to
eliminate liabilities. I'm sure he never mentioned that fact to you."

  I was silent.

Still not sure if this is on the up and up.

  "I didn't say that. I just wanted you to know that I've done
favors for you too. Chris kicked my ass when I told him Wells had
gotten to you first. It ruined all of his old plans. But again,
understand me when I say I don't care about the past. I needed you
alive too. All I need is you to somehow find and make up with
Chris, and then convince him he has more important things to deal
with than Abrahms. Like that Rufius guy you two seem to be so
worried about. Anything that would help those trapped civilians."

Need a break here.

Hmm. Seems like the only point to that scene was to rearm Screw, unless he
does try to save the civvies.

  I sighed and ran my fingers through my damp hair. "Ah, it's
not important. Every one

Everyone

  "Any word on whether the Mandate will approve the use of
Shock Troops?"

Heh. Screw is asking way too many questions.

  Of course this didn't mean I was against killing them if they
tried anything with me. War is hell, but it's also still war. Both
sides had their extremes; the Mandate had the Special Forces and
the Shock Troops while we had Das Uberdog and people like Chris
Dais. I was starting to believe we could do just fine without all of
them. I had served time under both sides over the years and the aim
of social politics in a closed environment was getting a lot clearer.

  Pure control.

Yep.

  It was now 5:00 AM and I had been awake for nearly forty
hours since escaping from the Apothecary the previous morning.
There were no buses running and I had no place else to go. The
only thing I knew of for miles was Korre's, my favorite bar, and
lacking a better plan I had decided to head there. Leah or Wes
might still be inside and let me crash in the stock room, which was
all I really needed right then. Trying to force myself forward I kept
the image of a bottle of Jack Daniel's aged rye whiskey in my mind
and dug up the strength to go on.

Nice motivator. :)

  "That's a relief. But you still look a little white."

  "Well, I haven't slept in a while. You know how it is." I
looked at her unnatural looking black hair and wondered why she
had felt the need to die

dye

  "No, don't go to sleep now! I'm taking you back to Diago's
place with me!"

  I lifted my head up. "What?"

  "I'm not kidding! Zig is there too."

Hmm. So that's why she was expecting him.

  "Suddenly all the windows just shattered and the place was
burning. Guys outside throwing bottles of gas and shooting into the
building aimlessly. It wasn't just vandalism, they were definitely
after someone, but its

it's

  I acted nonchalant and merely nodded.

Heh

  Screw-
  The back is locked up but you can open it with the
  keypad. If you can't remember the number, bang on the
  door until someone wakes up. But then I will murder you,
  so you had better remember.
Diago

Heh. Cute.

  I handed her my clothes and she folded them on a chair. It
felt good, I have to admit. I hadn't had a girl care for me like this
in a long time. Alethea never seemed to be around right after I got
in a fight. I wondered about this girl, a stranger until a few hours
ago and now she was wiping the blood and grime out of my eyes
so I could see without discomfort. Definitely indicative of
something, though exactly what was open to your guess.

In this story, you just never know. :)

curl around mine.

  Every time I get shot, life gets a little more complicated.

Now those are words to live by.

Excellent work. Feels like you're in a build up phase again. Looking forward
to getting to more.

D.B. Sommer

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