On Sat, 17 Aug 2002 01:51:56 +0400 "Kinnison, Myron N. AZ2(VF-103)"
<kinnisonmn@vf103.navy.mil> wrote:
Pulling off her shirt, she turned sideways and examined her profile in the
mirror. She was in reasonably good shape. Walking everywhere, especially
through snow in the winter time back in Saint Paul had seen to that, but she
lacked the curved, yet firm tightness of Bunny. Again, she felt the
irrational surge of jealousy.
Meanwhile Molly stood outside the window on the roof with her cam corder.
"Man Bunny'll pay a fortune for this. So will Rayleene's Grandpa."
You've added a whole new dimension to this scene.
"Mom likes to buy furniture that can be assembled and disassembled at
will,"
Amy Lynn replied. "I think it's a habit she picked up in the Army."
yeah sure it was the Army. I still say it was moving around to avoid
detection.
That _would_ be more fun.
Bunny grinned cheerfully. "Nope." She stomped on the clutch and shoved the
shift backwards, forcing Amy Lynn to grab whatever she could to keep from
flying forward and banging her head on the dashboard. "No seatbelts,
neither," she continued, seeing Amy Lynn now franticly looking around.
Needs more blind panic.
Maybe Amy Lynn trying to jump out onto the railroad tracks in front of an
oncoming express to get away.
"Pa taught me. 'Course, I don't drive recklessly like he does."
Amy Lynn let out a whimper.
Why was she reciting physics formulas in her head again?
Finding her religion. She's deeply regretting that she never got a chance
to probe the universe with that linear accellerator.
Molly proved to be correct and as the days became weeks, Amy Lynn got used to
Bunny's haphazard driving. Often, the trip was just into town, and the two
girls spent time in the general store, listening to the town's old men argue
and swap stories as they sat on front porch. She even got to meet Rayelene
Hino, daughter of the county judge, who lived with her grandather, who was
the preacher at the local church.
This last sentance seems a little awkward. Try losing the second 'Who' and
see how it sounds.
I'd drop the 'was' as well. Then it matches the clause after Rayelene
Hino.
More interesting to Amy Lynn, however, were the rumors of a blond-haired
woman who roamed the woods near the lake whenever the moon was in the night
sky accompanied by a black-haired wolf, searching for something. When she ask
ed Molly and Bunny about it, however, neither one could tell her anything.
Later, when Amy Lynn gave it some thought, she realized Bunny had looked a
little worried and even uncomfortable. The next day, however, a heat wave
struck and Amy Lynn forgot all about it.
Subtle as a truck their aren't we?
This aint your grandparents' Hearts of Ice.
Several weeks later, school started and Juuban Hollow's forty-five or so
children, ranging in age from six to seventeen, gathered in the school house,
a dilapidated scructure on a hill west of town. It was a single room and run
by Miss Haruna, a tall, imposing woman whose manner was almost as intense as
Rayelene's.
That's not a good thing.
She probably needs it to survive. No matter how sweet her disposition with
adults, she has to keep this crowd under control or she's a goner.
As Amy Lynn did so, she noticed two things.
The books had been printed nearly forty years ago.
They would be studying Long Division.
"Oh, no..." Amy Lynn whispered.
Yes Ami. Welcome to HELL!!!!!!!!!
I still think she should be whimpering rather than whispering. Anyone else
in that situation would be screaming, but Amy Lynn is so controlled.
Amy Lynn sighed and pulled on her work gloves. The brown leather was shiny,
having been purchased the previous day from Molly's mother. Amy Lynn was
wearing a straw hat to keep the sun off her face and neck, one of Bunny's
work shirts, old jeans, and a pair of work boots with paper in the toes to
make them fit. The boots had been left in the clinic by a previous paitent.
For a moment she reflected that the only thing of hers that she was wearing
was her hat, underwear and socks.
Okay! You're just screaming form me to lemonize this aren't you.
Sereously I like that. But concidering how practical and logical she thinks,
when she's alone in her rroom during the dog days of summer. What's she
going to wear? Hmmmm.
As big a block of ice as she can find. Ice is nice. She's probably built
herself an industrial strength ice making plant in her room with soda
straws, Dr Pepper, and a Woody Guthrie poster.