Subject: [FFML] Re: [Fanfic][AMG] Only Human - Chapter Five
From: "Chan Wei Lik" <weimin@pl.jaring.my>
Date: 7/20/2002, 10:53 PM
To: "FFML \(FFML\)" <ffml@anifics.com>


Keiichi was having one of those mornings.  The kind that appeared 
when the day before was so hectic and stressful that he could 
barely recall the details so quickly after waking up.<<

Try to set the scene properly. At first I thought Keiichi had just risen
from bed, then you mentioned his face was near the table. 

It resorted to Belldandy unexpectedly isolating herself in her room

Did this happen this morning or last night?

Lost in thought and worry, the wrench gave way, right after he had
succeeded in stripping the bolt so that it could not be removed.

Question, CAN you do that to a bolt?

"Everyone needs a hand up once in a while," Keiichi said softly, "It's
part of being human."

This is more like how Keiichi should be.

The roller coaster ride was superbly done.

You won't be able to fulfill any wishes. 

She hasn't done any in years anyway.

The best thing you did was to let Belldandy choose to remain as she was.
When the time comes, I hope you let her choose to change too. Don't
force her into a situation where she needs her divinity to do something.

I wish you well.


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