Subject: [FFML] Missing Link [fic][Utena][Missing Link]
From: "Caleb" <caleb_david@angelfire.com>
Date: 7/1/2002, 6:05 PM
To: ffml@anifics.com
Reply-to:
caleb_david@angelfire.com





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-- Attached file included as plaintext by Ecartis --
-- File: SKUmovie.txt

[fic][Utena][Missing Link]
By:  Caleb
By all means, let me know if you think I'm on to something or totally 
off base or if you're wondering what the hell is going on or any 
other feedback at:  caleb_david@angelfire.com   Revolutionary Girl 
Utena is the creation and property of Ikuhara-sama and various other 
entities, none of whom happen to be me.  I'm just borrowing them 
without permission.  Considerable spoilers and considerable weirdness 
abound in this fic.  Consider yourself warned.



Missing Link


          Akio couldn't help but flinch as the world was smashed to 
pieces before his very eyes.  When he reopened them and looked 
through the elevator door everything was back to normal.  Regaining 
his composure, the Prince strode back into his domain.  The last rays 
of the setting sun revealed that the sparse furniture had been 
overturned during the struggle which had recently transpired.

          "Anthy?" called Akio with a tinge of apprehension.  No 
response.  Now with agitation,"Anthy!"  Still no response.  Damn.  
Where was she?  This had better not be some game.  Still, he had seen 
her fall... Though he didn't want to think it Akio found himself 
looking down from one of the shutter openings.  Though the images had 
been illusions, projections of myth, Akio was old enough to not 
discount myths to readily, there was often some truth underlying 
them.  Even if Anthy hadn't really fallen Akio was unnerved by what 
he'd witnessed.

          Damn her.  Most likely she was just off in some corner 
sulking over this latest failure.  She could at least let him know 
she was alright; she knew he'd be worried sick about her.  But she 
probably was getting back at him for what'd happened to her precious 
Utena-sama.  Some nerve, considering who'd back stabbed her.  Damn 
that passive aggressive bitch.  

          As Akio turned back toward the elevator, determined to find 
Anthy, he heard a pained moan come from the other side of the 
projector.  Changing his course, he passed by the bleeding and 
convulsing hero, teeth gritted against unimaginable pain.  "Anthy, 
I'm sorry..."  Akio stopped and turned around, surprised.  

          "Even in the end you won't hate her, will you?  No... the 
one your hating is yourself."  There was a lot of blood.  Akio turned 
Utena over and examined the wound.  "*tsk* Idiot, you made this a lot 
worse with your pointless heroics.  If you would have just laid low I 
could have patched this up, but there's internal bleeding now."  
Utena didn't have long to live.  Akio pulled out his cell phone and 
began to dial, but then stopped as he realized there wasn't enough 
time for an ambulance.

          Shrugging his shoulders, Akio got up to leave, but at that 
moment Utena lost her battle to hold in the screams being ripped out 
of her by hundreds of slashing and stabbing swords.  If only they 
were real, for then surely she would have died and the torture would 
be over.  Then surely they would have severed her nerves, cutting off 
the pain.  But each impalation brought to the body the shock of a 
fresh injury and left the mind with the dread anticipation of further 
pain and the soul with no hope for respite.  "Oh God...Make it stop!  
Please make it stop!  Dios?  My prince?  Where are you...  why... why 
have you forsaken me?!"

          Akio remembered those words well.  In the end they all said 
that.  It was a sorry sight indeed, but Utena had brought it upon her 
self.  This was the price all who pretended to princehood paid.  The 
price for getting everyone's hopes up and failing to then deliver the 
impossible.  He owed her nothing.  And yet he found himself picking 
Utena up and putting her in the passenger seat of his car.  It was 
because of Anthy he told himself.  If she came back here while he was 
searching for her and found Utena like this it would be a bad thing.  
Yes, that was it.  First thing was to put away the pieces.  

         Grabbing the passenger seat and windshield Akio flipped over 
Utena and into the drivers seat.  As the engine roared to life Akio 
noticed a girl with a bow in her hair standing to the side of the car 
and holding a street sign that read Stage Lane.  Up ahead was another 
girl with twin pigtails holding up twin signs that read:  "Hospital:  
Exit Stage Left       Museum:  Exit Stage Right."  "Idiots.  I don't 
need stage cues," growled Akio as he spun the wheel to the left and 
sped off like a bat out of hell.

          A moment later a black car emerged from the shadow 
underneath the projector.  It looked exactly like the Akio car, 
excepting the color and the license plate that read kagecar.  Sitting 
in the drivers seat was a girl wearing a headband who had arm draped 
familiarly around an object concealed by a Shroud.  "Don't worry 
Utena-sama, we're almost there," declared the driver as she turned 
the radio to the Shadow girl theme and turned the car to the right, 
right into the side of the Chairman's tower.  *CRASH*  

          "Oops, the cursed clutch and misplaced steering wheel threw 
me off!  You okay Utena-sama?  On the bright side at least we didn't 
go between those arches.  That's one long drop.  Ooh, I knew this was 
a stupid idea.  I told them I didn't have my license yet,  but they 
insisted and told me the first part needed two sets of signs, so I 
was stuck with this.  *sigh*  Being the odd man out sucks, I get 
stuck with all the crazy roles.  Anyway, we're here Utena-sama.  Let 
me help you out."


                                                                     
*    *    *


          "Wow!  I didn't know the chairmen had such an amazing 
museum!"  squealed B-ko as she ran back and forth, trying to take in 
all the historical works.  "Oh, look at this, it's a signed first 
edition of "The Origin Of The Species" and it's got my picture on the 
back!"

          "That's your reflection idiot.  See, someone put a mirror 
on the back cover," explained A-ko.

          "Oh.  Hey, this is a cool painting.  This guys on the left 
is Plato, right?  Even with that heavy beard of old age weighing him 
down he gestures up to the heavens."

         "Actually that's really Leonardo.  Plato rejected the Gods, 
but in his old age became a bitter man recommending a state propped 
up with a fabricated religion because people were to dumb to be moral 
on their own."

         "Oh, but I thought Plato was a rather spiritual guy, he 
certainly looks like it in this picture.  And wouldn't the people 
eventually figure out that the religion was just a fake?"

         "For the last time, that pictures not really Plato, that 
beard and gesture are Leonardo's!  It was Porphyry's interpretations 
that created the Neo-Platonic idealization of Plato.  And the people 
wouldn't ever question the religion because Plato proposed a death 
sentence for any doubters."

         "He'd kill people for doubting a religion that he made up?!  
Boy, talk about a bitter old man.  Well, let's check out this 
"Theology of Aristotle" then.  Ooh, it's one of the original Arabic 
translations.  This must be worth a fortune.  Check this out, 
Aristotle's got some pretty cool ideas in here."

         "Aristotle didn't write that.  Some Neoplatonist concocted 
it in the fifth century and the Muslims mistook it for a genuine work 
of the Stagirite.  The real Aristotle was a down to earth scientists 
who'd have nothing to do with theology."  

         "Oh... Hey!  Isn't that the Shroud of Tur-"

         "Forgery made by a church in need of a holy relic.  A 
scientific study showed the pattern was just pigment painted on the 
shroud several hundred years ago."

         "A-ko!  Stop being such a kill joy and contradicting 
everything I say.  Aren't you in the least bit impressed by any of 
this?  This is our cultural heritage that's reached down through the 
ages to shape our present world and even the very patterns of our 
minds."

         "Um... B-ko?  We're Japanese.  These are all Western works."

         "See!  Your doing it again!"

         "Ah!  Young Mademolises, you are just in time for ze 
unveiling of our newest addition," announced C-ko in a bad French 
accent.  She was dressed up in a black and white striped shirt with a 
red beret and an even sillier looking fake mustache (for it goes 
without saying that French berets look silly).  "Zis is my 
masterpiece upon I have labored long and hard.  Viola!"  C-ko pulled 
on a drawstring, lifting up the Shroud which had concealed her 
statue.

         "Hmmm," murmured A-ko as she narrowed her eyes and 
critically appraised the work.  

         "Ooh, it's real nice C-ko.  You're so creative.  The wings 
are a lovely touch."

         "Creative?!  It's a rip off of promotional artwork done in 
the style of the Greek Nikes, which is totally inappropriate 
considering Utena was hardly victorious!  Weren't you paying any 
attention C-ko?  Not only did Utena fail to beat the final bad guy 
and save the princess, but she got mortally wounded to boot!"

         "A-ko, don't make a scene," pleaded B-ko.  Then she  turned 
to C-ko, "I'm sorry, don't take her personally.  She's so touchy 
cause she really believed in Utena to the very end.  That'd she'd 
become a real Prince and Revolutionize the World.  It really is a 
very nice statue."  

	"Nice?!  It's a wildly inaccurate forgery.  What the hell is up 
with the wings!  Utena never had wings!  Think of all the people who 
will see this and get the wrong idea."

          "How do you know Utena wasn't an angel?" countered C-ko.  
"The pic I used for the model came off the net, so it must be true.  
They say her body was never found, in fact, I've heard that at the 
last moment Dios saved her.  They must have ascended to heaven by now 
and are living happily ever after."

          "Bull crap!  The reason her body is never going to be found 
is Akio made off with it and  is probably dumping it in an 
incinerator as we speak.  I can't believe how gullible you two saps 
are, believing every pretty little made up story you hear," said A-ko 
as she threw up her hands in disgust.

          "A-ko," said B-ko gently, "you're getting so hung up on the 
little details that I think your missing what's important." 

          "Oh yeah?!  Well at least I've got reality.  You guys are 
completely missing the truth."

          "A-ko, how'd your audition go?" asked C-ko.

          "Huh?  Oh it was great.  I think I've got a good shot at 
getting the part, but what's that got to do with anything?"

          "How'd you end up working up the nerve to try out?  Did 
something... or _someone_ inspire you?"  prodded B-ko.

          "Uh, well... maybe a little, but I still don't see what 
this has to do with..."	  

          "And what about what happened after you took B-ko out to 
"celebrate" that night?  The A-ko I knew at the start of the quarter 
never would have had the guts to do that.  I wonder if perhaps 
someone inspired you there?  I wonder, I wonder, do you know what I 
wonder?"

          "Y-You were watching?!" exclaimed a blushing A-ko.

          "A-ko, I don't think it so much matters whether Utena was 
victorious or lost, whether she's dead or alive," explained an also 
blushing B-ko.  "What's really important was her life, how everyone 
who met her was inspired and had their life profoundly changed by 
her.  And that even those who never met her will be inspired by her 
story throughout the ages.  With art and myths, I think what's 
important is not that they're completely accurate, but that they make 
us proud to be human and inspire us to live up to our potential..." 

          "Uh, B-ko, I hate to interrupt your great speech, but it's 
time for us to do the voice overs for the last scene," interrupted C-
ko.

          "Ah, I love the song that plays then," sighed B-ko.  As if 
on cue the radio station the kagecar was tuned to started playing 
Baiser.  "Ahh, this has got to be the prettiest song of all."

          "Silly.  You said that about the opening to the Overture 
also," teased A-ko.  "Hey, you know what this songs other name is B-
ko?"  

          "Nope.  I just always called it that-really-pretty-song-
that-plays-right-near-the-end."

          "Is it Aphrodite Ascension?"  guessed C-ko.  

          "Nope.  The other name is... *CHU*"  

          "Real smooth, A-ko, but you guys can practice that anytime 
you want, we've got to get going... ACK!  Look out B-ko!" warned C-
ko, too late.  A blissful B-ko was leaning back against a statue of a 
nude goddess which was starting to tip over.  B-ko suddenly found 
herself without support and fell over backward with A-ko landing on 
top of her.  The statue crashed into another nearby statue, smashing 
to pieces and setting off a chain reaction of destruction before C-
ko's horrified eyes.

          "Look what you've done you two!  You killed Venus!" 
admonished C-ko as she dodged a chunk of falling ceiling and helped 
the two girls lying admits the ruins of the fallen goddess to their 
feet.

          "Quick, we've got to get out of here before this turns into 
another skit where we get killed at the end!  To the kagecar girls!" 
shouted A-ko as she struck a dramatic pose.

          "Uh guys, about the car..."


                                                                                       
*     *     *


          "ACHOO!"  Akio gave his car a queer look, wondering why the 
hell there would be sneezing on the radio.  Shrugging, Akio decided 
not to waste anymore time with this weird station and flipped the 
dial.  "The orbit of Pluto, Plato, a circumscribed circle.  The orbit 
of Sol, Plato, an inscribed circle."  "Nonexistent circle," corrected 
Akio as he finally reached his favorite station, 66.6, all Akio car 
theme all the time.  

          "I never showed you the Ends of the World, did I Tenjou?"  
said Akio to his unhearing passenger.  "Well, now it's your turn."  
The engine roared like a beast unleashed as the car began to 
accelerate unnaturally fast, 40...80...160...320...640...  Utena's 
pained moans increased in intensity, as if the depths of the sword 
thrusts were linked to the gas pedal Akio was mercilessly grinding 
into the floor.   With a final burst the Akio car reached a speed at 
which the street lights along the deserted highway and the pain 
throughout Utena's body climaxed into one blur.  

          "Does it hurt Utena?" snarled Akio as he focused all his 
attention on tackling the corners at such an insane speed.  "It's not 
me who's causing your pain though, it's the world.  The world can't 
abide Princes.  It always ends up destroying them.  Princes are only 
allowed in my world.  Any who try to leave it will soon find 
themselves at the End of the World.  But don't worry, they'll return 
you to my world after they're through with you.  They always regret 
it after they finish off a Prince, so they always return him to my 
safe, secure world.  Akio let loose a bitter laugh, "They're already 
making images of you as an angel you know."

          "Anthy..." moaned Utena as a silent silver tear began to 
slowly make it's way down her face.

          Akio glared at her and then continued, "I wish for once 
they'd tell the last chapter of the Prince's story right.  Once the 
Prince gets bit by the snake he's dead and that's it, he doesn't get 
to go see his damned precious rose.  You understand Utena?"  Utena 
just continued to cry.  

          Off to the right a tempest started brewing as a grave came 
into view.  Akio's face softened as he continued, "I suppose there 
are less harsh alternatives for the final chapter.  We're near the 
village that was once known as Herai, Utena.  Do you know who's grave 
that's said to be?  I like that as an ending to his story much 
better.  That he gave up all that craziness and escaped to Japan, 
raised a family, and lived a good long life.  Hell, I find that a lot 
more credible than the "official" account.  Like the judge, I was 
always suspicious about how quickly he gave up the ghost.  And his 
death was only confirmed by one officer, wonder how much it took to 
pay him off?  Doubt is was much, the officials didn't really care 
about doing him in.  Just appeasing local sentiment."  

          Akio looked down at Utena's swollen and bruised hands.  
Still affixed to her ring finger was the rose signet.  He gently took 
her left hand in his and kissed the tears from her eyes.  Inside of 
her he could feel her mind breaking down.  "I'll become a prince...  
Foolish human, there never was such a thing as a prince...  Do you 
love Himemiyia?...  Himemiyia, you and I... But I can't...  not 
anymore...  I'll save her from you...  Wrong!  This is the only way 
she can be happy...  I'm sorry for being a make believe prince...  
Your my sister's, no, my good friend...  A LIE!  ALL OF IT WAS LIES!  
MY LIFE WAS A JOKE BASED ON A LIE!  THEY ALL USED ME, but... but I 
let them, because I wanted to live in that make believe world..."

          "Poor thing.  You, Anthy, I, we  can't be happy in the 
outside world.  It's only in that inner world that we can have what 
we want.  I will give you a parting gift,"  Akio leaned over and 
kissed Utena's rose signet.  "As long as you wear this ring you may 
use my power...  Oh shit!"  

          Akio looked up just in time to see that they'd reached a 
dead end.  He desperately spun the wheel to the right, but the car 
was doomed.  However, the passengers side door flew open and Utena 
was thrown clear before the Akio car slammed into the Tokyo General 
hospital with a sickening crunch.  

          "What the hell did you think you were doing!  Damned 
motorists these days think they're God.  You're lucky to be alive!"  
yelled a doctor at a groaning Akio who was clutching his bleeding 
forehead.  The doctor spared Akio one last withering glance before he 
reached Utena.  "Holy shit!  This girl needs to get to the ER ASAP!  
Damn, and I was just about to go home."  

         Wasting no time, the doctor whipped out his cell phone.  "I 
need a table with an IV and a coagulant out here on the double!  And 
I've got a blood sample that needs to be rushed down to the lab so we 
can get a proper transfusion ready...what?  Screw the universal 
precautions!  There's a life fading here while you waste my time!"

          "She's B positive,"  said Akio as he unsteadily rose from 
the now flaming wreckage of his car.  

          "Wha...How the hell can you still... No, I'm not talking to 
you idiot!  Just send an IV of B positive after that table!  As for 
you for mister hot shot driver, as long as you can talk I've got some 
questions for you!"

          Akio was too tough to be taken out by an over 600 kph 
crash, but he'd just about reached his limit.  His precious car was 
ruined, the doctor's attitude was starting to grate on his nerves 
(Akio really really disliked self-righteous people), and he had blood 
dripping into his left eye (Akio also disliked blood, he'd made a 
point of banning it from campus his first day as acting chairman).  
This all was a good reminder of why he avoided venturing into the 
world outside Ohtori.  The sooner he got out of here and back home 
the better.  

          "Taxi!"  called Akio as he casually, despite his injuries, 
managed to both wave down a nearby green taxi and leap clear of his 
conflagration of a car.  Before the taxi had even came to a stop Akio 
used a half cartwheel half flip to get over the hood and onto the 
passenger side.  "I hate to leave her here like this," thought Akio 
as he jumped into the cab, "but it's not like I don't have a couple 
spare cars at home.  Damn this is humiliating, I could never stand 
using a taxi regularly."  

          "Wait!"  cried the doctor as he stood up with Utena in his 
arms.  "You forgot your..."  KABOOM!  The doctor was knocked back 
down as the explosion of the Akio car drowned out his last word, 
"key."  

          "Oh well," thought the doctor as he got back up and rushed 
Utena to the IV table, "such an irresponsible guy who runs away 
deserves to misplace those.  I've got a life to save."   

          
                                                                  *     
*     *       


          The first thing Utena became aware of, besides the dull 
pain in her heart, was the sound of an organ playing in the distance.  
It was a sad haunting piece, foreshadowing the death of a Greek youth 
after he barely failed in rescuing his beloved from hell.  The image 
of Anthy's hand slipping from hers flashed through Utena's mind.

          "Anthy!"  Utena forced her eyes open, the dried up blood 
that had glued her eyelids shut making it a considerable task.  A 
gasp escaped from Utena as she realized where she was.  This was the 
place where it had all started, where her destiny had been set in 
motion.  The church.

          Utena gulped as she noticed she was suspended in mid air.  
She tried to move, but found swords were pinning her against a cross 
on the wall.  It wasn't that bad though, the swords were no longer 
actively harassing her and she'd gotten used to the aching pain.  The 
only sword that really hurt was the Sword of Diablo piercing her 
abdomen.  At least it wasn't Anthy impaled this time, that was some 
consolation.  

          Utena's eyes were drawn across the chasm to the stained 
glass.  To her surprise she saw that her story was captured in those 
windows.  Thirty nine panes cast their soft light like a spotlight 
onto the three coffins in the center of the church.  There was one 
final circular window, bigger than all the rest.  Above the crucifix 
in the center of the church, it's black surface waited hungrily to be 
filled in.  "I'm afraid there's nothing left to be said," apologized 
Utena to the blank window.  Except...

          Utena closed her eyes as she remembered her first meeting 
with Dios.  Opening them she saw her younger self looking up at Dios.  
"I will!  I'll become a prince and save her!"

          "So impressed was the little princess by the prince that 
she vowed to become a prince herself one day.  But was that really 
such a good idea?"  mocked the shadows.  

          "No, it wasn't," replied Utena.  "A girl couldn't become a 
prince.  And besides..."

          "There never was such a thing as a prince," mocked Dios as 
he morphed into Akio.  

          Anger flared up in Utena at Akio's mocking know it all 
grin.  This was not the pure anger she had let out when confronted 
with injustice.  This was a dark venomous hatred, slowly twisting her 
insides as it futilely tried to find some outlet.  A LIE!  MY LIFE 
WAS ALL BASED ON HIS ILLUSION!  Utena felt her heart, which had once 
loved this man, began to harden.  At least it wasn't aching as much 
like this.  "I wish that I'd never met you that night!"

          "Oh, but who would have saved you then?"  asked Akio as he 
looked down on Utena.  Looked down?  She was off the cross!  Turning 
back she saw her limp unmoving body still crucified.  Examining 
herself, Utena blushed at her lack of attire, well not complete lack, 
she still was wearing her ring.  With a warning snarl at a leering 
Akio, she hastily bandaged her chest.  "You still seem intent on 
being a prince instead of a princess," smirked Akio.  "If you'd never 
met me you'd never had the opportunity to be a prince, and...  you'd 
never have met Anthy.  Would you give up being a prince... and your 
memories of Anthy?"

          "Anthy...  I'm sorry, but I can't be your prince anymore... 
it's to painful for me to bear... if only... if only we could have 
met for real and not as pretend prince and princess, but it's to 
late... I'm sorry I'm not stronger... but I have to let this all 
go... it's tearing me apart... I'm sorry I couldn't save you..." with 
tears in her eyes Utena cut her hair and let it fall atop the center 
coffin.  "Farewell."

          "You mustn't open your heart to the Ends of the World or 
the Rose Bride."

          "I should have listened to you," thought Utena.  "And your 
sister.  You both tried to warn me."  With a deep breath Utena closed 
her heart.  It hurt her more than all the tortures she'd endured from 
the swords.  When she looked up Akio's eyes narrowed in surprise.

          "My, my, you're no longer a child, are you?  Who'd have 
ever thought the open and care free Utena would ever put on such 
jaded armor.  You're outward personality has practically flipped, 
though I guess it's no surprise after how you were betrayed.  Welcome 
to adolescence Utena, you're well on your way to becoming a cynical 
adult like myself."

          "How dare you!  I'll never let myself end up like you.  I'm 
through with you!"

          "How fortunate for you then, you no longer need be caught 
up in his unfathomable game.  Forget about him and his duels for the 
power to revolutionize the world.  You wished to save the Rose Bride, 
but in the end she betrayed you.  You wished to be a prince, but in 
the end you couldn't live up to it.  Well, this is an excellent 
chance for you to go back to being a normal girl, isn't it?"  Utena 
let out a yelp of fright as Touga emerged from one of the coffins, 
bearing two bouquets of Roses, one white and one black.

          "T-Touga?!  What's with the black uniform?"

          "Why, isn't it traditional to wear black at a funeral?" 
smirked Touga as he leapt the chasm and laid the white roses at the 
feet of the crucified prince.  After mumbling some prayers of last 
respects Touga leapt back over to the coffins and presented the black 
roses to Utena.  "And these are for you my lady.  Even with your 
femininity concealed your beauty calls to me more loudly than the 
chorus of all the girls of the academy combined."

          "W-why are you here Touga," said Utena blushing, as she 
accepted the roses.  Their scent was remarkably similar to that of 
the poppy.

          "Because I can't ignore a damsel in distress, of course," 
declared Touga as he closed in on Utena.  She gasped as he pulled her 
in close and whispered, "It's the nature of being a prince."

          A prince.  Yes, she had mistaken him for her prince at 
first because he'd been there that night too.  And he'd sincerely 
wanted to be her prince at the end.  If only I'd let him be my 
prince... if only you would have saved me that time, then I never 
would have met him and gotten those notions about being a prince that 
hurt me and her so badly.  Then I could have lived the safe life of a 
normal girl with a normal romance.  Just that one slight change would 
make such a huge difference.  Utena closed her eyes and drew closer 
as she thought desperately, "I wish you'd been the one who saved me, 
Touga."

          Akio laughed as Touga grinned triumphantly at him.  "Is 
this your revenge against me?  I could care less what you do now, 
you're of no more use to me.  Mikage was right about how similar you 
were, do you remember what happened to him and his little fantasy 
world?  I'll warn you Touga, the prince inside her isn't completely 
dead.  When that desire of hers began to awaken it will destroy you 
so it can reassert itself."

          "If that is my destiny, so be it.  I will gladly follow my 
lady, even to the Ends of the World.  Shall we go Utena?"

          "Yes."  And with that Utena climbed inside the little girl 
in the remaining coffin and slid the lid shut, leaving her in the 
comforting oblivion of darkness.    

          
                                                              *       
*       *


          "Bubble gum pink hair?  Oh, you mean her.  Well, why didn't 
you say so in the first place, not many freaks... er (-_-; boy, she 
can go from kawai to kowai real fast)... people with hair like that.  
Yes, there's a Jane Doe matching that description here."

          "Tenjou Utena."

          "Huh?"

          "I told you her name was Tenjou Utena.  She's a friend of 
mine whom I'd like to see.  Now."

          "Um, I'm afraid that would be against our policy," gulped 
the receptionist.  The girl was still smiling at him, but he had the 
feeling she was the type of person you did _not_ want to get on the 
bad side of.  Plus that freaky monkey-mouse thing was starting to 
creep him out, what with the way it had climbed up onto the counter 
and was drinking his coffee while it's tail swished back and forth, 
back and forth, like an agitated cats.  And now... oh my God, it must 
have been his imagination, but he swore it was eyeing the Ctrl Alt 
Del keys on his computer.  

          "Um, but I don't supposed it'd hurt to let you see her for 
just a minute since your an old friend of hers, and uh, is this um, 
thing yours?" said the receptionist nervously as he pointed at the 
monkey that was currently typing Utena's name into the mental 
hospitals database.

          "ChuChu!  Behave yourself," admonished Anthy as ChuChu 
climbed back onto her shoulder.  Then she bowed to the receptionist, 
"Thank you, it's been to long since I've last seen her."

          "Well, I should warn you, she's not like you remember her," 
cautioned the receptionist as he led Anthy down the hallway.  "We 
know something traumatic happened to her because she just showed up 
at the ER one day with this big ol bleeding stab wound through her 
guts which nearly killed her.  Man, wait til you get a load of the 
scar it left.  Front and back.  And the entry wound was in the back, 
so some honorless creep must have driven a katana from behind; you 
see a street knife would be to short to go all the way through.  The 
way I see it the back-stabber must have been a real sadist, cause he 
could have killed her quickly by bringing the blade out with a slash 
and ripping through her, but he wanted her to die a slow lingering 
death, so he withdrew the blade without doing anymore damage.  What a 
sicko..."

          "*Ahem*.  

          "Uh, anyway (why'd she get so uncomfortable?  I guess girls 
got no stomach for blood and guts), turned out the physical wound, 
nasty as it was, wasn't the most severe.  Nope, the wound to her 
psyche must have been much deeper, cause she's completely withdrawn 
inside herself.  She just sits in her room all day with a blank look 
on her face, doesn't respond to anything going on around her.  
There's no damage to the hardware though, and when we scanned her 
brain we were surprised to find that there's a lot of activity going 
on in there, looks real similar to a sleeping persons scan, but not 
as random.  I figure what ever happened to her must have been so 
awful that's she's run away into her own personal dream that's 
protecting her from reality.  It's quite tragic."

          "I see."  The receptionist regretted that he didn't have 
any good news for the girl.  When she'd first come in she'd been 
quite vibrant and full of life, but he'd noted her become 
increasingly pensive as he'd informed her of her friends condition.  
Poor thing was going to need someone to support her.  ...And she was 
real cute.

          "Well, here we are," announced the receptionist as they 
came to door E 40.  "Your friends on the other side.  After you see 
her how about we grab a bite to eat?  There's a really great Indian 
restaurant around the corner.  Their curry is the best, real spicy.  
We could discuss options for how to take care of your friend in the 
future."  

          Anthy smiled in amusement.  "Thanks for the offer," she 
replied as she opened the door, "but I've already got other plans."  
The receptionist was momentarily crestfallen, but his spirit picked 
up as he saw the girl shine again like she had when she first came 
in.  Her whole face lit up as she beheld once again her prince who 
had believed in; believed in her and fought for her even after her 
betrayal.  How she'd longed for this moment.  

          Not that the journey had been tiresome or dreary, Anthy had 
actually enjoyed rediscovering the joy of the simple things of a 
world that she had long ago taken for granted; the aura and roar that 
surrounded waterfalls, the varied smells and tastes of summer 
festival, the sound of crickets chirping while one lazily watched the 
evening fireflies.  But through it all had been the nagging knowledge 
that something was missing; that special person to share it with.  
That person who'd be there through all the joys and trials of life.  
"Utena..."  

          Despite the fact that his brain told him is was completely 
irrational the receptionist half expected Utena to miraculously 
spring up at the sight of her friends joyful face.  Why, even the 
dead would surely come back to life to see such radiance.  "Utena?"  
But Utena did not even stir to her friends now pleading whisper.  

          Anthy's face fell for a moment, but then she held her head 
up with a look of fierce determination burning in her eyes.  "Yes, 
I've got other plans.  You see, I'm taking Utena out to dinner 
tonight.  Please leave us."

          There were many things the receptionist wanted to say to 
her.  Such as what she was asking was definitely against hospital 
policy.  That it was utterly crazy to think Utena would suddenly 
magically get better just because she wanted her to.  But instead he 
found himself quietly closing the door and heading back up front.  
That girl had a special charm that was hard to say no to.  If anyone 
could bring Utena back from where ever she'd ran away to it was her.  
He wished them both the best of luck.

          
          "Utena... I'm sorry," began Anthy as she caressed Utena's 
face and hair.  "Perhaps you don't want to see me.  I hurt you badly, 
didn't I?  But I'm a selfish woman Utena, I don't think I can go on 
without you.  If I were to lose you too I might as well follow my 
brother, so please..."  Unable to express her self with words Anthy 
embraced Utena in a fierce kiss.  God, she'd wanted to do this for so 
long.  Surely something in Utena would resonate with her desire.  But 
Utena was as unresponsive as a plastic doll.

          Anthy forced herself to stop.  She did want to make love to 
Utena, but not like this.  Though she was hardly the moralist, it 
still felt wrong.  ChuChu got a fan out of the purse and started 
cooling his mistress off.  Anthy sighed as the gentle breeze calmed 
her down, she just wasn't used to going more than a week without.  
Getting in bed with Utena had been near the top of her to do list 
once they were reunited, but she'd do it fair and square.  

          She remembered clearly when it first started.  It'd been 
the day Utena was showing off those earrings to ChuChu.  She'd looked 
very feminine without losing any of that special strength that made 
her Utena.  And the way she was flaunting it had been so naively 
seductive.  Like a maiden flower in full bloom, beckoning with it's 
sweet, intoxicating pollen.  That was the moment when she'd realized 
she wanted Utena.  It was frustrating that Utena hadn't seemed to 
notice her arousal; it'd been clearly visible in her riding up shirt.  
For a moment she'd felt like she really was a teenager, just 
awakening to the uncharted world of sexuality.    

          Yes, because of Utena so many things inside of her had been 
awakened.  She'd save Utena no matter what.  Bringing her forehead up 
to Utena's third eye, Anthy began to gaze into the mind reflected 
there.  Anthy let out a sigh of relief; Utena was here, just hidden 
very deep within the recesses of her own mind.  She was on a flight 
of fancy around the Castle.  Anthy gritted her teeth in exertion as 
she tried to get closer to Utena, but it did no good.  A flash of 
light erupted from Utena's forehead and threw Anthy back.  Utena was 
both armed and armored to repel any attempts of the outside world to 
intrude upon her sanctuary.  

          Well, if she couldn't get at Utena directly from the 
outside she'd have to go inside Utena's fantasy world.  "Chu?" said 
ChuChu worriedly.  

          "I'm sorry ChuChu.  You've been a good companion, but this 
is one journey you won't be able to follow me on.  Yes, it's pretty 
stupid to do a mind meld with an insane mind, but love is reckless 
you know.  Even if I lose my mind too and forget where I came from it 
will be worth it, just to be with her again.  I'll become a knight 
and pursue you toward the Castle Utena."

          The Castle... Anthy stopped and wondered if she was really 
being as heroic as she  sounded.  No, she was just being selfish 
again.  The truth is she'd gladly enter hell if she could once again 
be with the one she loved.  She wasn't really intending to save 
Utena, she just wanted to be reunited with her Prince.  Wait... if 
she forgot reality and her subconscious merged with Utena's to shape 
that inner world it would be possible to meet him again.  That which 
was no longer possible in this world would be there.

          Anthy wasn't sure whether to be excited or terrified by the 
possibility.  She had truly loved him, otherwise she wouldn't miss 
him so, wouldn't feel so guilty.  It was her fault for leaving him.  
That's what drove him to it.  What a cruel woman she was.  Leaving 
him even though she was the one who'd seduced him and dragged him 
down to her level.  

          Anthy gazed back at Utena and wondered if she had the right 
to do this.  Her brother and she were the one's who'd hurt Utena and 
whom she'd run from.  By merging her mind with Utena's she'd be 
shattering Utena's peaceful world and reintroducing the very things 
her world had been created to keep out.  And yet...  

          "I'm going to be selfish Utena, but there's more to it than 
that.  Your last words were a promise.  And I promised you that we'd 
laugh and have tea and cookies together," Anthy pulled a red rose out 
of her purse and placed it into Utena's hands, clasping them with her 
own.  "I can't help but feel it's destiny that has led us to meeting 
again like this.  Perhaps it's best for us to start over.  Forgetting 
everything will let us meet each other again, but for the first time 
as we really are.  Whatever happens now, after we've come so far, 
don't forget the promise we made to each other," Anthy looked into 
Utena's eyes one last time, then with a final thought merged her 
mouth and mind with Utena's.  "Someday... someday we'll shine 
together."
  

           


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