Suggested changes: {before : after}
On Mon, 24 Jun 2002 03:43:49 -0400 (EDT) Frederick Herriot
<fherriot@yahoo.com> wrote:
Settling on Toshitto, Lan watched as Rei, who served as a
deep-space sovereignty pilot, was ordered to Machibusu, scene of the
heaviest fighting against the Noukiites. She wanted to go with him,
but military authorities wouldn't let her. The Noukiites were
deploying starships of a design which outmatched anything the Onis
possessed. It was but only a matter of time before Machibusu
was overrun and the road to Uru would be wide open. That frightened
Lan. The Noukiites were showing uncommon savagery against their
centuries-old foe. Victory, despite the propaganda being churned
out by the government, was becoming more {faint : unlikely} by the day.
The _chance_ of victory might becoming more faint.
One night, when she was about to go to bed, she was struck down
by a blinding headache. Fainting on her bedroom floor, she remained
unconscious for almost a day. The newscast was on, reporting
{about :} an anti-matter bomb that wiped out the heart of Onishuto,
the capital city of Uru. Where Lum, her family, Rei's family,
Ten-chan and so many others lived.
"It's okay," the young detective grins. The party at the chapel
had gone on later than Ryouga had hoped, forcing the wanderer to camp
outside the rotunda overnight. He had been offered a chance to stay
at the cottage with Toshiko and Kumiko, but didn't want to risk
spending a night close to Ranma's love-starved mirror-twins.
"After all, if it weren't for Hibiki-san, Ani-chama's and Ane-chama's
wedding dress party wouldn't have gone {off so good : well}! Hibiki-san
deserves to remember it as much as everyone else!"
He chuckles, then gives her a warm squeeze. "She's not the only
one," he opens his eyes, then gazes fondly on her. "Not that I
really don't mind it in the long term. She does care."
The double negative makes the meaning a bit unclear to me.
Surprise crosses his face for a moment, then he chuckles.
During the wedding dress party, they had shared a {chase : chaste} kiss when
Ryouga, acting as the preacher, declared them "husband" and "wife."
"Good idea."
"To permit the treatment to take full effect in the shortest
period possible -- given the added problems his curse forces on him
emotionally and physically -- Ranma {requires : must} to remain in one body
for the whole of the treatment period," Negako instructs. "Since
the curse's nature does not allow us to freeze Ranma as a boy, he
must be a girl. Therefore, write up a medical note to the school
authorities stating that Ranma will be locked as a girl for the
period of this treatment. If that requires Ranma to attend girl-only
classes, so be it." A sarcastic smile crosses her face. Seeing
that, Toofuu tries not to grin too much; Negako was not the type of
person to express overt emotion to just anyone. "I am quite sure
that Pauline would take personal delight in 'torturing' Ranma this
way."
"If she was still alive, all you {: would} have to do is ask his mother."
"I only hope Father doesn't get too angry at the idea of you
taking on a new teacher, Nabiki-chan," Kasumi ruefully warns. "Even
though you were forced out of the dojo, you ARE seen as part of the
Tendou-ryuu."
"Too bad," Nabiki snorts. "If Dad won't get off his duff and
start teaching me, much less Akane, seriously, I'll go somewhere
else. Hell, I'd be tempted to ask Ranma-kun to teach me, to be
honest with you."
If you still plan to have Nabiki get drunk on Paradise Island, you will
need to start adding some tention soon. The Kasumi I see so far seems too
sensible to be so rigid and this Nabiki seems to resilient.
A hand gently squeezes her shoulder. "Hinako-sama, Ataru-sama
is simply protecting you from those he feels {are : is} a grave threat,"
Kimiko gazes on the youngest of the sisters. "Don't be angry at
him."
Everyone turns as Cherry and Sakura, alerted to Negako's true
nature by their spiritual training, {lung : lunge} at her, beads and
spirit-sensor out to battle this -- in the clerics' eyes -- ultimate
enemy of humankind. Before they can get close, someone dives at them
from out of the sun. The feet catch the monk and the priestess
in the backs of their necks, sending them to kiss the walkway!
Everyone jolts, turning away for a split-second, then on looking
back, gape on seeing it was Ataru who intercepted them.
Everyone save {: Ataru,} Negako and Mendou hit the deck. The latter is
frozen still, stunned beyond belief after seeing his katana literally
EXPLODE in his face after Ataru tapped it with the Heart Blast Touch.
"DARLING!!!" Lan/Lum gasps, then breathes out on seeing that Mendou
was okay. "Darling, be careful when you do that!!! You could've
taken his head off!!"
Everyone winces, watching as an incensed Sakura rails at Ataru,
she gesturing wildly as she waves her spirit-sensor in the general
direction of Negako. The ninjitsu grandmistress, standing close to
Lan, has a bemused {stare : look} on her face. Nearby, Cherry performs
every demonic exorcism spell he knows {of :} to remove the *saikoo
jinseijitsu* from Negako's body. He doesn't realize, of course,
that he'd end up killing her since she is the only spirit inhabiting
that body {at this time :}. Lan watches the nurse/priestess
rail at Ataru. Within the possessed alien, Lum seethes. She was
tempted to find the biggest book she could, then drop it on Sakura's
head to make her stop shouting at Darling like that. Seated across
from Ataru, Mendou, Shinobu and Ryuunosuke listen in, trying to
understand what Sakura was so nervous about. And Ataru...? He
almost looks ready to go to sleep.
Sakura balks, then shuddering at his flippant attitude, swings
back her spirit-sensor to knock some sense into the man's head.
Wrong move. His hand catches her wrist, then he sends the priestess
flying into a wall. "Ataru-kun!!!" Shinobu gasps as Sakura slides
to the floor, passing out.
It might be more poetic to alter the swing of the sensor so it knocks her
out.
"Yeah," Benten sighs. "Look, Nassur doesn't believe that
Moroboshi woulda intentionally killed three billion people even IF
any one of 'em would've killed him if they got the chance! I agree!
He just ain't that type of guy!! But..." she shrugs. "If the Church
leaders who survived that mess, the ones with the Niphentaxian
Fleet and on the colonies, saw that...! Hell, you can sure guess
what they'll all end up concluding!"
This sounds awful reasonable for Benten.
"It's okay, Kimiko-chan," Kasumi gently pats Kimiko's hand. The
older Tendou daughters, the mirror-twins, Happousai and Kimiko relax
around the sitting room table. "Father's become {torqued over : concerned about : worried over} the
whole matter with the schools since before Akane-chan had her big
fight with Ranma-kun on Tuesday. And after what you just did to
Uncle..."
"**I know,**" the Cyborg slowly nods. "**I had to do that,
Sensei. Much that I hated doing it, I had to do it. Right now, I'm
too dangerous for most of the people in Tomobiki to be around {with :}.
And right now, I seem to have found someone who's in as much need of
help getting herself out of the pit her life's become as I needed
{it :} weeks ago. But...**" he stares at Lan. "**At least Lum will have
someone to be with her from now on.**" He reaches out to touch Lan's
forehead again. "**Pity I didn't learn of what your mom did to you
when you were a little girl. Seems we've got something in common
now. Take care of her, Lan-chan.**"