Odd. I thought I was more caught up than this. *Shrug*

I'm not sure if this chapter works or not, as I've been messing with it
on-and-off for easily more than a year.  Feedback is very welcome.  I
have some thoughts of stuff I'm considering doing with this chapter at
the end, but I'm wavering on whether to do them.

Well, let's see what you have for us today:

***

Those denizens of Nerima who have come to know Mousse have often
commented that the young man has a peculiar way of looking at life.

Example one:  His amusing (if ultimately doomed) attempts to become
captain of the Kendo Team without actually knowing Kendo.

Who knows. Around here that might not be an impossible dream.

Example three:  His belief that it was less reprehensible to have
several dozen other people beat on someone than to actually do it
yourself.

Actually I term that rather smart. :)

Hence, Mousse taking a good long look at Shampoo, then and charging
towards her, arms wide, crying "My darling Shampoo, you came for me!"

Shampoo: Shampoo hoped Mousse was dead.

Ranma: Don't you mean 'though Mousse was dead'?

Shampoo: No.

One:  Creeps are to be pounded.

Two:  Girls are to be protected, especially MY girl.

Three:  That guy strikes me as a creep.

Four:  Said creep is about to try to glomp MY girl.

Ladies and gentlemen, meet Ramna Saotome.  Mousse, meet Ranma's
foot...in your face.

Mousse: (through foot in mouth) Ha! This foot is small and girlish, even if
it does pack quite a wallop. No woman would find a man with feminine feet
attractive.

Mousse watched the byplay in shock.  "Umm, excuse me...."

"Shaddap, creep."

"Silence, dog!"

Heh. I wonder if Mousse feels privilaged having people compete to beat him
up.

Ranma sighed and brought up a fist.  "Jan Ken Pow you for it?"

After a moment's hesitation, Tatewaki nodded.  "Acceptable."

Several seconds later, Ranma swore. "Damnit!  I never win at Jan Ken
Pow!"

Shoot. Trying to remember what I just saw that had someone losing over a
hundred times in a row at that. The person that was winning even told the
losing character what he was going to do, and the the loser still chose
wrong.

"But-" Akane protested.  "No one beats Mousse!  He's the best in the
school!"

"Mousse stupid blind fool," Shampoo scoffed, almost skipping along them
in cheer.  "Poet boy turn into stir fry."

This should be interesting.

***

"Shampoo said so," the amazon gloated.  "Mousse weak male.  Nothing like
Airen or even Poet boy."

Tatewaki hissed as Kodachi examined a bruise on his neck.  "Zounds!
Gently, woman."

Well, he did get at least one good lick in. Mousse isn't that soft.

Tatewaki smirked in a self-satsified sort of way.  "He rather reminded
me of someone, so I took the chance to relate my impressions."

***

Nabiki puzzled over something the nurse said to her after she dragged
Mousse to the infirmary (couldn't do to have one of her favorite marks
permanently hurt, after all).  *Lu Bu?*

Got me what that's supposed to mean.

Ranma nodded sagely, his lips twiching as he tried to suppress a smile.
"No appreciation for great literature."

Kodachi: You don't even know what literature means.

"Shampoo no understand how Mousse like Lu Bu.  Lu Bu was mighty warrior,
many great feat in battle."

Tatewaki nodded, but held up a finger.  "Yes, he was, but he was also a
fool, a coward, a dishonorable knave, and ultimately, was put down like
a feral beast."

The Ghost of Lu Bu appeared before them. "Lies! And they forgot to mention I
have great fashion sense. Now I shall haunt you for sullying by good name.
Boo, boo I say."

Ranma sighed.  First day in school, already he had bucket duty.  What a
wonderful omen.

"This is all your cousin's fault," Akane groused.

"Shampoo think fault belong with Mousse."

Well, he's in good company.

"Hey!" Ranma protested.  "They don't do crap like that in Shamps tribe,
right?"

"Once did," Shampoo allowed, with a blush.  "Long time ago.  One girl
want many husband.  Very much pervert girl.  Killed by many jealous
girlfriend."

Heh.

Kodachi took a breath to ask for more details, but then halted.  "No,"
she muttered, "I think I don't want to know."  She looked over at Akane.
"But then why did all those fools go along?"

"Yeah, I mean, why did everyone want to date you?" Ranma added.

"And what's wrong with me?" Akane demanded angrilly.

"Shampoo make list." And handed it to her.

"Bad oral hygene?! I brush my teeth everyday!" Akane raged.

"Aww, I didn't mean it that way, jeez."

Shampoo nodded in agreement, and then giggled.  "Is silly.  Many cute
girl in school.

"Shampoo thinking about hitting on some." She saw the look Ranma shot her,
and sweatdropped bigtime. "Err, so, Ranma. Shampoo sometimes forget she
attached girl now."

"Okay," Shampoo said blandly, and then began to curse in Chinese.  It
was a rather long, involved curse, that worked its way up his ancestry
claiming many unpleasant things, working its way back down his family
tree describing more of the same, then spending a good long while
discusing his own intellectual deficiencies and genetic abmormalities,
and then finally ending on a suggestion of some very nasty places he
could go and some downright awful things he could do there.

Ranma, who understood enough Chinese to get himself into trouble,

Heh. Cute way to term it.

your cousin was."

Tatewaki frowned and nodded.  "Did you inform him of the matter of last
evening?"

It took Nabiki a moment to figure out what he was talking about.  "Oh
no, Saotome-chan, I'm not going to have that join the rumor mill."

Hmm. Been so long I forgot what it was.

"I'll see what I can do about damage control."  Inwardly, she cursed
herself for giving away information that was infinitely more valuable
hidden.

As long as she has her priorities straight.

Shampoo sighed.  She was never one to be patient, and this stupid waste
of space teacher was trying what little she had.  "Shampoo say one more
time," she growled.  "Not going to special class."

"Young lady," the teacher primly, adjusting her classes down on her nose
by the temple, "Your grasp of the Japanese language is deplorable."

"It no bad for 3 week learning!  Shampoo want see you learn Chinese so
good that quick!"

"None the less..."

Shampoo: Nonetheless is one word.

Teacher: Er... Okay, you can stay.

"Hey, if I wasn't allowed to butt in on that fight of yours with that
crazy Perfume chick back in the village, you ain't allowed to mess in my
fights now!"

He raises a point.

Packing up her papers, the teacher grimaced.  "The principal gives
special consideration for martial artists in this district," she
explained, and began to walk out of the room.  "Why do you think young
Mousse and young Miss Tendo over there would haven't been expelled for
violence a long time ago?"

The young lady in question flushed.  "Those perverts attack ME!"

Teacher: Stop bringing the facts into this.

Shampoo began to curse louder, becoming quite eloquent in her insistence
that her husband was a moron.  Kodachi looked sideways at her and said
with am amused tone.  "I believe the exact phrase you're looking for is
'Ranma no baka'."

Akane; She shouldn't call him that. It's just plain rude.


You gotta use irony when the opportunity presents itself. :)

Shampoo paused, and mouthed the words silently.  "Ranma no baka," she
said experimentally.  "Shampoo think she like that."  She gave a most
heartfelt sigh.  "Now Shampoo miss more class getting hot water for
stupid airen."

"Why Shampoo, I thought you loved him?" Kodachi said slyly.

"Shampoo does.  No change fact he no swiftest arrow in quiver."

Shampoo: But Shampoo like them big and dumb, or in Ranma case, just plain
dumb.

Kodachi: I imagine that's the same reason you have so many admirers.

Shampoo: Probab... Hey!

***

"Everywhere I go," Ranma griped, "the kami find some kinda way to make
cold water find me.

Actually it was a case of Genma giving Ranma  a 'lucky water charm' that
guarenteed the holder would find water no matter where he went. In deserts,
it was a life saver. Anywhere else, it was an annoyance.

Ranma looked at her in shock, and fell off the branch face first,
hitting the ground with a numbing thud.  The Amazon sighed at her
husbands antics and poured the hot water on him; then blushed as she
realized that while the chinese shirt Ranma affected was like a dress on
his female form, it fit rather differently on his male form.  *Shampoo,
you are one LUCKY girl.*

Rolling on his back, Ranma looked up at Shampoo's face and discovered
the most extraordinary thing - somehow, the girl was able to leer with
only a raised eyebrow and innocently widened eyes.  Following her gaze,
he looked down and saw...

...well, himself.  (This isn't that kind of work, my friends.)

"Jeez!" he yelped, and drove for his pants.

Eh? When did he lose his pants?

"Shampoo no have stupid Airen!  Airen go to class!"

Heh. Thought so.

"I request that you cease calling me that, Nabiki Tendo."

"Not happening anytime soon, Saotome-chan.  That was Ranma and Shampoo,
wasn't it?"

"I am unfortunately forced to confirm that."

"I hate to point this out, but your cousin is whipped."

Tatewaki sighed again.  "That he is."

Nabiki: I only hope i can make somene that submissive to me.

Tatewaki: No way I'm being engaged to you.

Genma grunted.  "Not exactly what I planned for the boy," he muttered
and then stood to head back into the house.  "Nodoka's going to kill
me."

Tatewaki frowned at this, but kept his silence.

***

(1) Okay, for those who didn't get this, go read The Romance of the
Three Kingdoms....expect to take a while, it's no short read.

No. I'm not going to read a novel to get a joke when I'm so backlogged on
the C+C. :P

Thoughts:
1) More school scenes?  I dunno.  I want to get things going, but I'm
not sure if I'm moving too fast.
2) Tack on a Tatewaki/Kasumi WAFF scene at the end?
3) More scenes about Ranma/Shampoo?  The story's supposed to get off
them for focus now that I've established their relationship.

It's open to anything you want to do. The story's lose enough to fit just
about ideas you want. Some humorous chaos at school for all to enjoy could
be fun. New antagonist that's in Mousse's corner to help him even things up,
or screw things up when he/she tries to help. Lots of things open to you to
go with. Not much help, I know, but it's still real early in the story and
we're just adjusting to the tone in it.

D.B. Sommer

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